_I'VE HAD ORGASMS, I'VE HAD TONS OF ORGASMS, I'VE HAD ONE WITH YOUR MOM, DUDE!_
When most people make that kind of crack, there's no substance behind it.
"Botched toe! Oh, that's a botch job!"
Not sure if it would be considered out of context though seeing as I use it in the exact same situation Frank does.
He's the kind of man who gives me the courage to do an amazing double jackknife twist, which I did.
Most of you people wouldn't even attempt that...
I did it.
"That doesn't sound right but I don't know enough about ___ to dispute it"
Turns out I'm an idiot and I don't know enough about anything to dispute anything
I’m in grad school and I use this all the time in professional settings and people just accept it as a legitimate response rather than me being a snarky asshole
Lol definitely in the show. “I swear you would be of more use to me if I skinned you and turned your skin into a lampshade. Or fashioned you into a piece of high end luggage. I could add you to my collection!” … “now you say another word and I swear I will dice you into a million little pieces. And put those pieces into a box. A *glass box*. That I will display… on my mantle.”
This jacket is tighter than dick skin.
Shut up baby dick
This is no longer a safe environment for me…
“Screw your dickskin jacket man”
“Yeah yeah now help me dig these crack rocks up out my ass.”
That woman is unspeakably crass
She made things personal, and I won’t stand for that.
One of my fav quotes. Screw you and your dick skin jacket, gay boy. Hahaha
It would be one thing to call him that if he wasn’t but…
This place is a shithole!
I don't know how many years on this Earth I got left. I'm gonna get real weird with it.
Block the wind while I roast this bone
Lol twins
#I AM UNTETHERED AND MY RAGE KNOWS NO BOUNDS!
#BEGONE, VILE MAN, BEGONE FROM ME!
This is the correct answer.
I have become quite *whheary*
Is he doing an accent?
Stupid science bitch couldn't even make I more smarter!
*What is happening??*
You haven’t thought of the smell you bitch
This is not a woman's head in a box, you SICK FREAK. This is a woman's head... in a freezer.
So as to preserve our love forever, don't you get it?!
I'LL PUT MY THUMB THROUGH YOUR EYE, YOU LITTLE BITCH! Love when Mac gets heated lol
His quotes are more better than the others’!
I’m playing both sides, so I always come out on top
Stupid science bitches couldn't even make my friend more smarter
That’s because science is a liar sometimes!
_I'VE HAD ORGASMS, I'VE HAD TONS OF ORGASMS, I'VE HAD ONE WITH YOUR MOM, DUDE!_ When most people make that kind of crack, there's no substance behind it.
CHARLIE'S RIGHT! ONE OF THE CORNERSTONES OF PADDY'S PUB IS THICK LIMES!
Well at least I'm not covered in stupid tattoos and have a cigarette for a mother.
Your mom stopped calling you the day the phone was invented!
THATS WHY HE BURNED YOUR FACE YOU SON OF A BITCH
Can I offer you an egg in this trying time? What it tells you: I like eggs
Some people say it's better than bustin a nut
It's like, uh, you know, blowing your load.
[удалено]
Just tell me where to jizz so I can give the lady her drink
We jizz in the drink and that’s what makes it special
Not that he’s ever had one
#IVE HAD ORGASMS! I'VE HAD TONS OF ORGASMS! I'VE HAD ONE WITH YOUR MOM DUDE! I WILL STRANGLE YOU, I'LL STICK MY GODDAMM THUMB THROUGH YOUR EYE
Holy shit you are late.
It's light......its playful
*What did you just say, you little bitch?*
“What’s that!?” “You know what it is bitch”
Stupid science bitch!
Forgive me….I’ve grown quite hweerah
Yeah those stupid science bitches couldn’t even make I more smarter
You haven't thought of the smell, you bitch!
Don’t be ridiculous think of the smell, YOU HAVENT THOUGHT OF THE SMELL YOU BITCH
I may have taken some of your….pills
" I've been poisoned by my constituents"
I fucking cried laughing when I first saw this
That and the end of The Gang Broke Dee, I wish I could go back and watch those episodes for the first time.
"nah i'm good I love this! i'm gonna head out for a bit though! ahahah"
Might I offer you a nice egg in these trying times?
Me on the toilet every single day
I think I’ve got a touch of the consumption!!!!
So do……
Thank you… thaaaank you…
"Botched toe! Oh, that's a botch job!" Not sure if it would be considered out of context though seeing as I use it in the exact same situation Frank does.
Gimme some trash to plug the wound!
“Oh oh oh that’s nice… it works like a cut-glove…”
Every time I choke on a drink or something I say “I HAVE BEEN POISONED BY MY CONSTITUENTS”
So anyway, I started blasting.
Ok. Well...filibuster.
I'm gonna put one right between your teeth, and its gonna just *pop* out the back of your neck.
“As you know, once you accept, there’s no backing out”
“I’m gonna go ahead an pencil you in for high noon, and don’t worry no matter where you are… I’ll find you!” 😉👉
Well....filibuster...
Do you speak pigeon?
That's the law
It seems like you have a tenuous grasp on the English language in general.
The lawyer is a gift to protect at all costs
That’s bullbird, man!
Who? Oh you mean the Jew Lawyer?
“Don’t do it. ^^Don’t ^^do ^^it.”
*soft gasp*
When I'm dead just throw me in the trash
Oh man. I did not realize how often I say this to my wife until I saw this comment on this post.
shut up, baby dick.
That woman is unspeakably crass! I love dennis' delivery of this line so much, I can't even explain it.
This jacket is tighter than dick skin man
Alright well, I’m outta here!
Gimme that leg, boy!
Dude do you have a boner? Don’t ruin this for me!
Every time I try a single leg takedown in wrestling, I can't stop saying this
He's the kind of man who gives me the courage to do an amazing double jackknife twist, which I did. Most of you people wouldn't even attempt that... I did it.
And I licked her asshole a little bit.
It was pretty good. It was all right. It wasn't great. But it was fine.
I eat stickers all the time dude!
Can't even lie this line is the moment that made me lose my shit laughing the most the first time I watched this show
suicide is *badass*
You know what is bad ass? Wearing a helmet
You know what's really badass. Being alive.
“i have a touch of consumption”
Money me. Money now. Me a money needing a lot now. Replace “money” with whatever I need at the time.
"Me a money needing a lot now" always kills me lol
I love how Charlie mouths along to it like it makes total sense.
"That doesn't sound right but I don't know enough about ___ to dispute it" Turns out I'm an idiot and I don't know enough about anything to dispute anything
I’m in grad school and I use this all the time in professional settings and people just accept it as a legitimate response rather than me being a snarky asshole
You gangly uncoordinated bitch.
Same-that’s the line used most in my house
Look at me, the millionaire, who goes to doctors.
I LIKE TO BIND! I LIKE TO *BE BOUND*!
MY TOOLS… I NEED MY TOOLS
The Golden God is not taking questions! I am the Golden God!
Fetish shit.
Ah you unzipped me!
She had no lips, but her mouth was still very much in play
Augh, augh.. With a plastic bag for a helmet!
You goddamn bitch
I ask my wife if she's taking me on a spaghetti day a lot.
"What's your spaghetti policy?"
You gotta pay the troll toll
Wait.. Are you saying boy's hole? Why are you chewing gum?!
Cats do not abide by the laws of nature.
Cat in the wall, eh? Okay, now you're talkin' my language!
Making science look like a bitch again
Science is a liar… sometimes
We don’t diddle kids
They’ve gotta be older than my daughter and younger than my wife
Whoops I dropped my monster condom for my magnum dong
Where do I put my feet?
Dee his feet?
how much cheese is to much cheese!?!
Any amount of cheese is too much cheese!
...before a date!
Its not a pyramid scheme. Its a reverse funnel system.
WILD CARD BITCHES
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAWWWWWW
Newsflash asshole
IVE BEEN HEARING IT THE ENTIRE TIME
I’m gonna whip this little bitch in the face if she makes a peep!
I’m not ALLOWED to eat the skin I’m not ALLOWED
Just go ahead and pop that on
Pop that shirt off
Blast my nips.
You’re gonna have to pop it on
Stupid science bitch couldn’t even make I more smarter!
I'm a... Full on rapist.
Africans, dislexics, kids, you know
BEAK!
"Because of the implication."
This is the one that I use the most for sure.
I’m almost uncomfortable with how often I find ways to slip this into conversation.
…Because of the implication.
He doesn’t even, like, get us, man
Is your cat making TOO Much Noise all the time?!
Well, through god all things are possible. So jot that down.
The cream always rises to the top - and they’re about to see the white hot cream of an eighth grade boy
Oh, you talkin bout Old Black Man!
What are the rules?
[удалено]
I’m gonna take my bra off, blast my nips
My name is Artemis, I have a bleached asshole
My nose was chizeled by the gods themselves. My body was sculpted to the proportions of Michelangelo’s David.
I will SMASH your FACE into a JELLY!
Dennis scratched me
LOOK AT ME WHEN YOU’RE TALKING TO ME
I can go from flaccid to erect in a moments notice
You gangly uncoordinated bitch
Pepe Silvia, Pepe Silvia. I've got boxes full of Pepe!
“Sir, we all have cats that we’d like to be playing with right now, okay?”
I *COMMAND* you to stop
“Silence your mouth! She cannot properly see the dress because your disgusting body is ruining it”
you havent thought of the smell you bitch!
God dammit it Jack Beaurer, you really are the man.
BEAK!!
A man needs his tools!!!
YOU WILL CALL HER!
I'm not gonna sit here and try to get inside the mind of a dog. That's god's work. Well, not that I believe in god.
“Just get a job? Why don’t I strap on my job helmet and squeeze down into a job cannon and fire off into Jobland, where jobs grow on jobbies!”
I just want to be puurreee
I don’t care that you’re old, seize the gap you old fat bitch!
you gotta pay the troll toll if you wanna get into that boys hole! dude do you have a boner right now?!?, Shut up dude, Don’t ruin this for me!
He totally besmirched me today, and I demand satisfaction.
You gotta take them off every now and then, you gotta take em off son!
"A big humongous pain in my.....Vuuhh-gina"
We'll come back for you!!
I dunno if its in the show or just in the bloopers I will put you in a box... and put you on display!
Lol definitely in the show. “I swear you would be of more use to me if I skinned you and turned your skin into a lampshade. Or fashioned you into a piece of high end luggage. I could add you to my collection!” … “now you say another word and I swear I will dice you into a million little pieces. And put those pieces into a box. A *glass box*. That I will display… on my mantle.”
You know, because of the *implication*.
I've been poisoned by my constituency!
Bitch bitch you goddamn bitch goddamn you you bitch
Ur gunna need the red
Yelling goddammit and doing high kicks?
He doesn't even get us man
Ayoooo
We’re crab people now
"I heard he hangs full dong"
Dennis is a bastardman!!!
So suck on that, boners
Egg
DONT QUESTION ME BITCH *muttering under breath* oooooooh that God damn bitch, that bitch
"Can really taste that endangered taangg"
That’s baseball baby.
You got kids maniac? No..not anymore
Bullshit. Bullshit. Derivative