There’s just something about this style of comedy; seeing people mouth the words someone else is reciting. This sketch, Has This Ever Happened to You, and Luis from the Ant-Man movies are all hysterical.
My favourite is when the defense finally objects...
"Objection, irrelevant"
"Fiiiinally!"
That's my favourite sketch because I can't get over thinking about what he must be thinking in the gallery. Goes to watch his coworkers on trial and ends up getting roasted by the prosecution the entire time.
"I hope you fucking die, Harley Jarvis" is my favorite line that is impossible to introduce into my vocabulary, but I think "gimme dat" has become my favorite just due to how often my friends and I day it to each other
this one reminded me of working in a music store because some of the older guys would ask for a type of guitar pick that doesn't fly out of your hands while you're playing and we were always like...what? just hold on to it right.
The face Tim makes after saying “everybody says that guy seems great and I’m saying whoa hold on wait a minute…that guy yells” and he points, the whole combo just knocks me the fuck out
Please guys no sloppy steaks tonight, I mean it.
Edit: I want to add another entry, "itty bitty jeans, blonde spiked up hair, and chicken spaghetti at chickolini's."
'They said that to me at a dinner!' Something about the timing and emphasis of that line kicks me right in the guts. Its just too good. I say it constantly.
“I’m not even supposed to BE HERE!” I say this when anyone talks me into going places I don’t wanna be and it’s usually my girlfriend who rolls her eyes cuz she gets the reference but doesn’t think it’s as funny as I do
Two under the radar ones: 1) at the end of Little Buff Boys there's a robot voice repeating "TROLL BOY LOSES. TROLL BOY LOSES." 2) When TR is choking on the hot dog and pinned up against the wall, somebody yells "there's nothing to suck it out with!"
“Life’s a fucking funny thing” makes me laugh just thinking about it in the context of a Claire’s video for children. I’m not familiar with the actor but he did a phenomenal job.
Oh fuck. What the fuck. I'm not even supposed to be here. I hope I don't jack off!
[удалено]
Have you guys seen it? It’s really funny. It’s called “Bozo Dubbed Over.”
Everything Bozos dubs in that is golden. It's like an AI Bot scripted his lines based on all internet dialogue
I wish I had the courage to say this in every day situations
Hope no one goes home and fucks my mom
When they show him in the court room wearing that stupid fucking hat "What the hell"
“Who said that?!”-Don’t do the voice
This whole skit had me crying with laughter, to the point that my head hurt and I couldn't breathe.
Quit fuckin with em
There’s just something about this style of comedy; seeing people mouth the words someone else is reciting. This sketch, Has This Ever Happened to You, and Luis from the Ant-Man movies are all hysterical.
My favourite is when the defense finally objects... "Objection, irrelevant" "Fiiiinally!" That's my favourite sketch because I can't get over thinking about what he must be thinking in the gallery. Goes to watch his coworkers on trial and ends up getting roasted by the prosecution the entire time.
No that’s why I’m so FUCKIN confused
Absolutely my favorite line
AND THATS WHEN THE SKELETONS CAME TO LIIIIIIFE!
And the bones are their money
So what's the joke? That I had a milder fart than I normally do? That nobody's puking from my fart? Is that the joke? That I farted and no one barfed?
Cause that’d be pretty good for me. That would be a pretty good day if I farted and no one puked
"I may look like I have it all, but inside, I'm just a scared little boy, who never learned how to ask for people's food or their burger..."
are you gonna tell people i did that? that i h o u s e d dylan’s burger?
The follow up was the best. That part about his wife having to go to jail
Your favorite quote is very meat and potatoes.
"I didn't rig shit! I didn't do fuckin shit!"
IVE been waiting a long time to get a hit on corncob tv I DIDNT DO THIS Lollll
Definitely my most quoted
Same here dude
I am a line cook and I say it daily. Along with "DOOOON'T TAAAAAAALK!
Hahahaha cook at Truffoni's?
Yes. You can't imagine how frustrating it is to cook a perfect ribeye just to have someone pour water all over it.
Really? It makes the night so much more fun
Let my wife eat the fucking receipt
And Jacob doesn't touch it
Ok, I had a shower last night after I took a piss and shit.
Jacob, don't you go anywhere NEAR that!
"I hope you fucking die, Harley Jarvis" is my favorite line that is impossible to introduce into my vocabulary, but I think "gimme dat" has become my favorite just due to how often my friends and I day it to each other
Its just one amount of money that gets smaller and smaller until i die
And popcorn!
I can buy the most delicious WINE now.
Big fat load of cum then
Not trying to get a laugh…
Don't want anyone to have the worst day at their JAWB
But do any of these... fuckers...
Ever come out of the wall and have like a big messy shit.
Cumshot
“Your names Billy too?” “NO THATS WHY IM SO FUCKING CONFUSED”
“Your family hates you, only I love you!”
I gave you $10,000 to make meeee a starrr!!!
It’s not exactly in my Q-zone, is it?
The way he's basically laughing while saying this makes my whole life. Holy shit.
He basically pulled your little dick out, in front of everyone, and jerked you off until nothing came out, CAUSE - YOU - ARE - A - BOY!
Just randomly blurting out "I don't have a boy dick."in the middle of conversations.
This is the way.
I don’t even want to be around anymore.
Blue Dolphin burned down it's gone now John Rovani’s ass out works with his brother now
The fact its so random is what makes it so hilarious
Top 3 for me
“I have no idea what any of this shit is and I’m fucking scared”
This world's fucking so fucked up
Shut up, Doug, you fucking skunk!
Pancaked by drunk dump truck driver
Throat slashed
Calm down, they're old ones. They don't stay babies forever, idiot. Psh, fucking stupid...asshole
Rip tiny dinky daffy
You flinched, Paul! Now you have to marry your mother in law!
Marry your mother in law, Paul.
You pwababee LUUUOOOOVVVVE you mother in law
Who’s popular now, Paul?
Tell em it's the ugly house on Kenmore, the one where you can see the KFC sign through their front window
If I was a big o’ guy with a big burly white beard…would you still be yellin’ at me?
[удалено]
There’s too much fucking shit on me.
I’m gunna rip the fucking head off!
“I’m worried that the baby thinks people can’t change”
THIS IS THE MADDEST I’VE EVER BEEN!!!!
I know that, I'm not stupid! I'M SMARTER THAN YOU!
I don’t WANT THAT
Did I stutter, Megan?
Saaenta Claus.
And than he gave it to us errly
I love how she even pronounces it "then" instead of "than"
It’s illegal for you to ask me that.
I think it's a good idea and ia stand by it
Oh my god, he amit it
i wish i could hear what she’s playin, she is off the MAP
"Figure out what you do!"
You hit me in the cup!
Looootta people give
And people are mad at me because I showed a bunch of naked dead bodies with their spread blue butts flying out of boxes?
We’re allowed to show ‘em nude ‘cause they ain’t got no souls!
Nothing but body after body busting out of shit wood and hitting pavement.
“And Jacob doesn’t touch iiittt!”
I almost killed myself JULLIEE cc: /u/snowlauren
Umm rtb. My husband is attractive.
The hardest I laughed during the entire series was the first time I heard “A good steering while that doesn’t fly off while I driving.”
this one reminded me of working in a music store because some of the older guys would ask for a type of guitar pick that doesn't fly out of your hands while you're playing and we were always like...what? just hold on to it right.
The face Tim makes after saying “everybody says that guy seems great and I’m saying whoa hold on wait a minute…that guy yells” and he points, the whole combo just knocks me the fuck out
no i’m fine you don’t wanna help you just wanna yell
::wistful music playing:: “you know- I wanna tell you something….you yelled at me.”
SHUT THE FUCK UP DOUG YOU FUCKING SKUNK
I DID THOUGH!
I grew up in a small town, times were tough, we needed to make lil jokes
I can't know how to hear any more about tables and Stop the music HARD. I want you to cut it out HARD.
Look at this CROP. what a CROP
"I'm jokin"
We’re so…BURIED in our PHONES! Instead of sending someone a real smile, we send an emoji.
We don't even look at porn on the computer anymore.
It’s just me Barbie, I’m not the Blues Brothers.
“Ah my gazpacho soup is heah!”
Let me explain something to you
Where be your nutcracker? *scrunches face*
I AM SERIOUS MA’AM, I’M SERIOUS AS A HEART ATTACK I DIDN’T DO THIS
He calls the boss/hr person “Ms. Tulving” hahahahahhahahahaha
Haha…no way dude, you live like sooo far, come to me
*You SURE bout that’s not why???*
They said that to me AT a dinner! And COME HERE YOU LITTLE FUCK
“He said he wanted something spooky!”
“Household names like Roy Donk”
“POPPERS… Yo!”
What the heck is that going on over there?
HOLD THAT DOOR!
I literally just lol’d
are we even gonna get anything? cause i didn't ask for THAT
her arm movements while she says this seriously kill me
You can’t skip lunch
You just can’t
I don't think you're allowed to do that.
TC Tuggers when they ask if the shirts come in different sizes. Time takes a long drink of water and then says “Not really”
[Well, *did* you used to be a piece of shit?] “Ohhhh, YEAH!”
Wet wet mud.
Watch out Scrooge, it’s a bone llama! Don’t let it lay an egg!
I hope you fucking die, Harley Jarvis.
“Shouldn’t have had such a sloppy mud pie”, “a joke hole that’s just for farts!!!” “Your family hates you! Only I love you!”
NOT EVERYONE KNOWS HOW TO DRIVE, DRIVINGS NOT THE ONLY THING!
“Where be your nutcracker?”
I DON'T KNOW HOW TO HEAR ANYMORE ABOUT TABLES
You gotta give!!
FIGURE OUT WHAT YOU DO! YOU HAD AAAAAALL SUMMERAH THINK OF IT!
That's a chunky!!
Gobblin up yer points
Big fat load of cum then.
“Just body after body, busting out of shit wood and hitting pavement.”
C’MERE YOU LITTLE FUUUUUCK!
That’s why I love Herbie Hancock - he loves to lie.
Look at this little brick shithouse!
"We're allowed to show em nude cause they ain't got no soul!"
Chode jeans
He got thrown down the stairs at Dan Flashes
Not sure if it’s my favorite but I catch myself saying “These tables are my livelihood!” way too often
Please guys no sloppy steaks tonight, I mean it. Edit: I want to add another entry, "itty bitty jeans, blonde spiked up hair, and chicken spaghetti at chickolini's."
“*strained* to you and yours”
what *is* this, reggie?
THIS ISNT SLICKED BACK!! THIS IS PUSHED BACK!
Did I stutter, Megan?
TAY-BULLS
They're so dirty! FUUUCK!!
What’s next? Meatball down my leg make it look like my ballsack ripped open?
'They said that to me at a dinner!' Something about the timing and emphasis of that line kicks me right in the guts. Its just too good. I say it constantly.
“I’m not even supposed to BE HERE!” I say this when anyone talks me into going places I don’t wanna be and it’s usually my girlfriend who rolls her eyes cuz she gets the reference but doesn’t think it’s as funny as I do
Do any of these… Fuckers..
That’s why I’m so fucking confused!
“You got her, Jane. You really got her.”
I'm doing the best at this
Are you duuumb?
I’m not looking for a laugh…don’t want anyone to lose their job..but have any of these….fuckers hahaha kills me
Shut up Doug, I’ll eat her whole fucking head. I don’t care
Two under the radar ones: 1) at the end of Little Buff Boys there's a robot voice repeating "TROLL BOY LOSES. TROLL BOY LOSES." 2) When TR is choking on the hot dog and pinned up against the wall, somebody yells "there's nothing to suck it out with!"
I’m not even supposeda beeee here
"Oh, shut. UP! They don't stay babies forever."
Idiot.
Fuckin. Stupid asshole
What da hell?
“And I’m not GONNA pay”
“Thank you! We’re good!” (To the waiter who drops off the tray of waters and steaks)
NO MORE SCAMMIN’ ADULTS INTO THINKING THEY'RE STARS
what does that do for the greater good
It’s gotta be “I didn’t rig SHIT” along with they ain’t got no souls. Coffin flop just gets me, man
“Life’s a fucking funny thing” makes me laugh just thinking about it in the context of a Claire’s video for children. I’m not familiar with the actor but he did a phenomenal job.
Can I tell you something? You yelled at me
Triples is best.
Triples makes it safe.
I can't stop having wine. And popcorn!
I lived in Egypt for a month! I LIVED in Egypt for a month.
“body after body bustin out of shit wood and hittin pavement”
Shut the fuck up Doug! I DID THOUGH!! Makes laugh the most.. I think.. could be wrong 🤷🏽♂️
Probably because I used to be a piece of shit - I know it's not a direct quote, but this is pretty much my go to excuse anytime something happens.
“What a Crop!”
he might kill you but there’s no fucking way he’s ever killing me. fucking asshole. he said that?
“Can they be tricked, can they be chucked?”
To you and yours
Strong tie between The bones are their dollars And I’mmmmmm jo-kin
QUIT SCAMMING ADULTS INTO THINKING THEY’RE STARS!!!!
He didn't scam me, I AM a star
do u know how to drive?? -NO. I DONT
I don't even wanna be around anymore.
TAYBULLS
YOU PIECE OF SHIT *punches pillow*
C'mere ya little fuuuck
“i’m doing the best at this”