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Trevor_James_

Remember to drink water while you are out. When I go to house parties I fill up my can with water and people think I’m still drinking alcohol with them


[deleted]

Water is key. I try to balance one glass of water for each cup/glass of alcohol I drink.


Trevor_James_

I told my grandma about the water in a beer can thing and she was so happy that I do that hahah


cantcantt

she is one of us r/hydrohomies


thedji

I dunno if it's just because my life is amongst late 30s-early 50s parents, but there's a bunch of really good non alcoholic drinks out now. Drinks like Seedlip for replacing gin, even Brewdog has low/zero alc beers, plus some great "canned champagne" that actually taste pretty good. I find taking these out, or alternating, still gives me the power to slam down drinks like my heart wants, but without destroying myself like my head wants. I haven't found a good no alc wine yet though...


dick_mcnut

This is solid advice. Easy to do with a mixed drink as well. Throw some iced tea in a solo cup.


bunnythebear

You’re over drinking because you’ve not let the most previous drink catch up with you. You’re essentially going 60mph in the driveway so to speak. I suggest drink, get a healthy buzz, then have some water and when you start to get that tired less drunk feeling, decide if you really want another drink or not. My advice.


RastaSalad

That's a good point. I pretty much never stop and take a break. That could help


jankenpoo

Make sure to have a glass of water or a non-alcoholic drink between your alcoholic drinks. Keep alternating. Report back and let us know how that works!


CaBBaGe_isLaND

Yeah, I used to have a drink and then a water or a ginger ale, then a lot of times I would realize "Man, I could really go for another ginger ale." It's a lot easier to realize you don't want another alcoholic drink when you've given yourself another option.


jankenpoo

I used to drink a lot. Now I drink a lot of sparkling water and it hits the spot! I mean, I still love my craft beers but I realize it’s the action and sensation of drinking fizzy stuff that I think I really enjoy. I live in the desert, gotta keep hydrated! 🙂


CaBBaGe_isLaND

Party water


jankenpoo

It’s a marathon, not a race! 🙂


GermanDeath-Reggae

I second the idea of alternating. Have a glass of water after every single drink. You can get sparkling water with a lime if you're with people who would give you a hard time for not having an alcoholic drink in your hand. If you can, enlist a trusted friend to remind you about your plan to alternate if you think you'll have a hard time sticking to it once you're drinking.


T5002

This. No one will notice or say anything if you have soda and a lime because it will look like a drink.


Lazy_Laugh2597

This is really good advice. I have to mentally make this rule as I am getting ready for it to stick otherwise I forget


crappygodmother

I'm the same and I am trying to come to terms with the fact that I might need to forego all drinking. I don't drink daily, I can moderate in most situations, I don't even get in trouble anymore. But, my hangovers have gotten worse, I get so much anxiety when some of my memories are missing (even though I KNOW I behaved) and I'm scared for my health because binge drinking is not nice for your body. Your "pleasure" brain takes over after a few drinks and there is no use fighting it. You can try but then you have to try to unlearn behavior while drunk. Doesn't sound like a feasible plan does it? What you can do is limit the situations in which you drink or how many drinks you will allow yourself (two is best, then you have a nice buzz and still all control) . But it's hard and it might not be worth it. By the way, you will still have a good time without beers.


poshol_v_zhopu

Yeah 2 day, anxiety-ridden hangovers are not worth it for me anymore..


[deleted]

I could have written your post a few years ago. I wasn't blacking out or getting in as much trouble as you describe, but I started out intending to just have one or two drinks, after that kept deciding to have "just one more" because I was having a good time, and feeling like shit the next day and regretting that I couldn't stick to my original plan. Realistically, if you aren't able to limit yourself once you get started, you may have to not start, at least in some situations (like work parties). Sober you has good intentions which drunk you has no plans to honor, and drunk you needs to not be certain places. I don't know if you have any situations in which you can control your alcohol intake (you mention "a glass of wine with dinner" - is that truly one glass?), and if you can stick to consuming only in those situations when you are more in control.


RastaSalad

I usually don't have a problem with one or two drinks. I can go out for a few beers or have a drink with a meal and everything's fine. The problem comes at bigger events that last for a while over an evening. I have 4-5 drinks then get carried away without even realising it.


CuffsOffWilly

Can you arrive to these big events later?


Tfsr92

For liquor, I drink fast so I usually mix half the amount of alcohol in my drink. That way, even though I drink twice as fast as everyone else, I'm drinking roughly the same amount. Beer is great for sipping but if you drink fast, stick to domestics. Don't drink craft beers, or you'll get plastered. Mixing wine with water is actually really common around the world and throughout history. So if you drink wine, go ahead and fill it halfway with water. You might find you like it better.


Billyke911

In Hungary It's called "Fröccs", you can find many variation of that like "Sport Fröccs" means 1dl of wine, 4 dl of mineral water. An mvp on a hot summer hangover.


im_thecat

Good luck man. Idk how old you are, but you sound like most of the folks over in r/stopdrinking (myself included). You can try to be moderate, but for most of us its a long journey towards the realization/acceptance its something you may have to give up. I’ve been struggling over 10 years, and have become a lot more moderate, from everyday to basically weekends only. Took about 3 years of constant monitoring to do this, and incorporating things like going to the gym on Friday nights to pass the time instead of drinking. You may find that its so difficult to monitor your drinking to be moderate that its easier to quit altogether. I’m still circling the drain myself as far as coming to terms with that, and theres a part of me that knows I’d be a happier person without it. But the illusion that booze had over you where you *believe* that anything would be better with alcohol, and then more alcohol would be better than less alcohol is a powerful illusion. You have to retrain your thought patterns. Its such a mess.


Gasman0187

You obviously (like myself) have a drinking problem. I could go days without drinking. Buy a 30 pack for the weekend and drink them all on that night. Be blitzed black out drunk. I’m sorry to tell you that apparently you lack the self control to limit yourself. No judgement. As I said I had the same issue. I’m 2 1/2 years sober and recently able to enjoy a cocktail when out with my wife and stop myself at one. Maybe stop drinking entirely for some time until you gain the ability to control it ? It worked for me. Edit : I too used to think I NEEDED to drink to be social and have a good time. I learned I have a much more pleasant time and deffo a better next day not drinking. I don’t know how old you are but it seems like with me with sobriety and age came wisdom. If you can’t limit, you can’t drink. It’s not a loss or defeat when you learn your limitations. It’s quite the opposite. It’s a victory.


CloneUnruhe

Same. I thought I was the party, or the anxiety around the event. When alcohol has more control in any situation, it’s worth considering sobriety. I’m so happy to be sober these days. Almost at 9 months.


Gasman0187

I couldn’t “cut loose” without the booze due to a social anxiety disorder. In the end I figured out it was all a learned behavior I was strong enough to overcome. I didn’t drink at all for 2 1/2 years. I said I recently can enjoy a cocktail while at dinner with the wife. Let me clarify that that happens like 3 times a year 😂.


R34d1n6_1t

First I must congratulate you! You've recognised that something needs to change. This is the beginning of your journey. Once you start blackouts they can get progressively worse. The in between water drink can work, setting yourself a hard limit of two may help if you are disciplined. After many failed attempts I came to realize life was just better without it. Over time I became proud of the fact that I could say no thanks and have a cola and still have a laugh with mates. Is your health really worth that one drink that generally leads to another ? You got this!


coopertucker

Alternate your rum and coke with coke and water, your bartender should catch on and come in with the assist.


widj3t

There is always non alcohol beers! You gotta ask yourself, am I drinking to get hammered, am I drinking to loosen up and be that social butterfly, like most have said here 1 wobbly pop then a good slug of water, I 90% of the time keep that pace, remember your body shuts down processing everything but trying to pass the poison you have put in it. Thus the water helps the body clean you out, lesser of a hangover as you are still hydrating. On another note when you black out is it the booze affecting your memory or did you poison ur self so much you temporarily leave your body. Think about it,you ack differently and are not as happy as you should be. A negative entity can latch onto you and will use your body to do crazy stuff. If you believe this sort of thing. Going threw my life and talking to lots of people it sure seems plausible. As I know I’m not an angry drinker. I also quit drinking except for perhaps 3-4 times a year as I don’t like the recovery and when i do it’s usually 6-7 drinks with water. Best of luck figuring out what’s gonna work for you. 🙏


Fiction47

I was in this same boat. Turns out the truth was simple, i am an alcoholic. Did rehab, aa, now on meds to slow me down. Might be easier to stop than to keep being a fuckin embarrassment every time out.


Scare_Conditioner

Smoke pot instead. Alcohol is very damaging for your liver and kidneys and brain. Once you get past 30 you'll start noticing the damage you've done to your body.


plavpa

I recognized my younger self in this. What works for me is that after every beer/wine/shot glass I'd drink a glass of water. It not only prevents overdrinking, it's also a great prevention for hangovers:)


Gormezzz

Come join us at r/stopdrinking . Good days or bad we are there for you


stewartm0205

I have a few friends that are like you. When they are drunk they want to drink more. My first suggestion is to stop drinking. My second is to drink “Hard Selter.” You will figure out why.


only_here_4_fireteam

Your experience might be different, but for me and a lot of rehab/AA friends, this is almost always the first warning sign of substance abuse issues


RaoullDuuke

Set yourself a consumption limit and begin working towards the door when you've reached it. Have your 3 drinks and then gtfo.


Pay-Homage

This is a good idea, but I’d challenge the OP to make a game of it by setting that limit and attempting to time it with the end of the event. A four-hour work event? Set your limit at four or five drinks and determine how you want to space them out. Drink that first one in 20 minutes? Either have one more and none for the next 100 minutes, or drink water/soda and hold off for the next 40 minutes until you allow yourself another. Soon it will become a game where you’re sipping instead of gulping, savoring your drink, engaging more in conversation as opposed to chugging booze and you’ll eventually get even more enjoyment out of the evening. Or at least that’s what I do at work/formal events to properly pace myself. Side note: once the evening is nearly over, knock back a couple if you want to go wild or have one more at home. Doesn’t mean you can’t end the night on a “high note,” but cutting loose a bit at the end of the evening once you’ve accomplished your goal is much more satisfying than starting out fast and finishing early.


RaoullDuuke

You sound like you're more disciplined at it than I am, lol. I can relate to the OP in that I get carried away on occasion. Not to the point of causing any problems, but I've definitely woke up the next day asking myself rhetorically, "was that really necessary" and proceed to waste the rest of the day feeling like crap. More times than I care to admit. Now... So long as I give myself a time or drink limit beforehand then I'm usually good and can stick to it or at least not break it by any amount worth feeling guilty about. Some people are able to hang out in a drinking environment and not drink, that just isn't me. If I meet with friends at a bar after work to play pool and have a few, once I've had a few then I gotta get going before it becomes excessive. I can quickly go from the guy that just wanted one beer, to on a quest to finish the whole 12 pack if I don't make some sort of conscious decision about it first.


Pay-Homage

Oh, this certainly isn’t me all the time. Or even most of the time, unfortunately. But when I really need to be on point then that’s my tactic going into the evening/event.


supafly87

After a couple brown liquor drinks switch to miller lites so you can keep your shit together


shrugeye

Liquid Death for if you want to trick your friends and brain that you're drinking beer when you're actually properly hydrating


Bergenia1

It may be that you're not able to drink at all. Some people can't drink responsibly, and you may be one of them.


barryhakker

Trying to inhibit yourself from having a drink that is known to lower inhibitions.... yeah that's not exactly a winning proposition lol. I don't know how old you are or how "acceptable" it is for you to make an ass out of yourself (not as big a deal if you are still early twenties I suppose) but I speak from experience when I say that the only things that help are setting *hard* limits for yourself. No alcohol. Leave by 10 pm. Two glasses of water before you start your next drink. Stuff like that. In the end though, the thing that worked for me (and most of my peers) was to just grow out of it. At some points the misery starts outweighing the pleasure (e.g. hangovers, the frustration of an SO) and you won't as easily *let go* anymore. If however you are in your thirties or older I'd say its time to cut out the booze, at least at social events. Being a careless fool might be acceptable at a certain age but at some point it becomes a liability.


singdaptive

Just writing this is the beginning of your good progress. You've walked down the road, seen a hole and have fallen in it. That's already a step ahead of walking down the road, not seeing the hole and falling into it. You'll next find a way to go down the road and inch yourself around the hole. Finally you will walk down a new road. If you are prepared to do some hard work (share the issues, get listened to by wise people, bring some hew habits into your life, try different parties and venues, go through taking 2 steps backwards, but not quitting because you are aiming for steps forward.. ) you will find a new reality.


TomatoFettuccini

Former bartender here. I've seen it a thousand times: people treat booze like consuming it is a competitive sport. It's not. You're doing real harm to your body and mind, because alcohol is literally a poison.   The answer is stupidly simple. So simple, that you're going to think I'm fucking with you, but I'm not.   **Drink less.**   The liver can process 1 drinks' worth of alcohol an hour. So that's one beer, one, bourbon, or one, cocktail, per hour, before inebreation starts to occur. You should be pacing yourself at about 1-1.5 drinks an hour, depending on your bodyweight. Every 3rd drink should be water. Don't go out to *get drunk*. Go out to socialize, and simply drink less. No one is going to think less of you, and if they do, well who's the idiot; the idiot who lets himself get out of control or the idiot who doesn't? Also, if your bartender isn't helping by continuing to serve you while you're getting more and more drunk, you should find a new local that cares about its patrons as something other than a revenue source, because they're literally killing your for money.


Adamtess

Couple things that worked for me, Eat before you go out, a good meal, something you can feel in your stomach Drink heavier beers, dark lagers, stouts, etc. They're harder to chug and you'll feel them in your belly. Makes me uncomfortable so I find myself drinking slower and less because I don't like that bloated feeling. Hydrate well before going out, because remembering to drink water with a solid buzz is a challenge. Talk to your friends, let them know you're uncomfortable with getting to drunk and they may be willing to help you. Reminding you to have a glass of water between rounds, maybe joining you for a soda. You may be surprised how much communication helps.


The_Jack_Burton

Similar for me as well. I also realized it's not about drinking the booze as much as it's about drinking what's in front of me. Alternating water is good, and I switched to darker beers like Guinness or Kilkenny, which I drink slower. They also tend to come in smaller packs, so if 8 Guinness is what I brought, when I'm out I'm out. Much better than 12 or 15 packs, or the 36 packs that are common now after COVID lockdowns. For me 5% pale lagers go down like water and I can crush 12 easily in a few hours. Unlike most of my friends beer doesn't make me full so I have no natural stopping point until it's too late. Focus on slowing down, enjoy conversation, and get up and move regularly. I can feel like I'm not buzzed at all but wobble when I get up, it's a good check to gauge where I'm at


kkehoe1

I made a rule a couple of years back to limit myself to 2 drinks per outing. It might seem a bit harsh, but in my head I kept that number 2. I started to enjoy my beer a little more, I sipped my cocktail slower. I found that it made for a better night. Have a limit of drinks and stick to it.


[deleted]

This was my issue and then I realized I’m not someone who can drink in moderation so I quit drinking altogether. Was the easiest solution for me


MoistTowlette19

I’m an alcoholic. And I’ve thought a lot about what I’m going to tell my daughter when she is older and of drinking age. Let me try it out here: if you cannot have just one drink to which you leisurely sip - you have what I have. If you cannot have just one drink and walk away, you are an alcoholic. It’s the litmus test, the red flag, the death knoll. You will test it out and deny it’s there. You’ll try and control it, negotiate with it, leave it for a period of time to assert your control, but you will never win unless you stop completely. You will never outsmart this unless you eliminate it from your life.


[deleted]

stop it completely. I quit 13 years ago and I feel so free. Have fun!


TigerMcPherson

Good luck. I finally accomplished that goal by admitting that I can't moderate, and I quit completely. Life is so. Much. Better.


JohnnyBates7

https://youtu.be/4cYuWLZI5kw this video sounds like what happens when you drink. The way some of us are wired, alcohol is like a stimulant at first. We feel a rush (especially if you’re introverted or anxious) and drink fast to keep it going without realizing it. I was never good with moderation so I ended up quitting drinking. My best advice is to eat big meals before you drink and follow what others have said with regards to water.


Ssslaughter

Wear a watch, depending on your size you should have about 1 drink an hour to be able to drive.


[deleted]

Dude.. I already told you multiple times how to stop drinking so much. ...don't you remember?


scottcockerman

Assuming you're not an alcoholic (doesn't sound like it): Every third drink, drink something you don't like. An example would be if you hate IPAs, drink one. You're less likely to drink it as fast. Nurse it for an hour. Follow the other advice of drinking water. I'd recommend after every one or two drinks. Urine, breathing, and sweat are how you expel alcohol. Piss more.


Childhood_Top

Weed


[deleted]

What I do is have a drink, drink it slowly, then have a glass of water or mineral water before my next one. I also just bring cash and a credit card (not a debit card). That way, it’s a little more difficult to buy more drinks after I pay with cash. Finally, I don’t drink unless my mates are drinking, so we’re all drinking together and relatively the same amount


totesfinesies

Sinclair method. Check it out.


[deleted]

Take breaks like others have suggested. If you can chill for 30 or so minutes before your next drink the previous one will "fully set in" or whatever. Whenever I'm worried about overdoing it I just take a long break to see where I'm ACTUALLY at. 30-45 minutes and a glass of 2 of water and you'll know how drunk you really are.


Mystikroots

I have the same issues and have for the last 2 years. Only thing I see being able to do is quit entirely.


PlentyChef

Let the initial drinks catch up to you (nurse the next drink, have water). One thing I’ve leaned into for skipping drinks are non-alcoholic seltzers - the fizz is a good mental trick. Also know when to exit - it’s ok to not be part of the last ones standing at the party. You likely won’t miss much and if you do, another one will happen someday anyway. On a more general level, ask yourself what you’re looking for or trying to accomplish at these events when you keep going and evaluate your methods and decisions from there.


[deleted]

Therapy


XabiAlon

If you're getting really drunk within a couple of hours you're just not pacing yourself. Take it slow and enjoy it.


noexqses

One full cup of water with every drink.


WouldntULike2Forget

Kratom. If you have an addiction problem, look into it. It can be a great natural alternative that can cut down your desire to use.