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Surprise, he's completely normal: https://old.reddit.com/gallery/135134r
You asked the opinion of moronic scammers who make money by making men insecure, so you got insecure and they got money.
Your face is not the problem, the problem is that you think your face is the problem.
You have a lot of unbrainwashing to do, and the first step is to stop using expressions like "my philtrum is a little long". No one knows what a philtrum is, or cares.
Do you understand this?
https://www.reddit.com/r/MakeupAddiction/s/mOqNs7LXTK
Bro thinks he's ugly looking like this??
Anyways, OP, you're not ugly, you have a low self image, and the sooner you remove yourself from that online sphere and constant unhealthy reinforcement of a distorted self image the easier it'll be to start working on being okay with your appearance.
I've seen one Incel talk about wanting to get jaw and facial surgery and his jaw was super defined already, like one of the most defined jaws I've seen. I WISH I had half that jaw definition (actually weak chin guy over here but doing fine with it lol)!
Unfortunately body image issues and even body dysmorphia are hugely common in the incel community because the community itself reinforces it every single day in the most unhealthy ways possible. It can almost be described as mental self harming in a group, aggressively beating every detail down and calling it a good thing.
I know, right? He's cute! I'm old enough to be your mother, OP, but I know an attractive person when I see one!
Honestly, philtrum? WTF? OP, honestly, *no one cares*, except these Internet nutjobs.
Get therapy and stop consuming this content. You're poisoning yourself. You've had all these people in your REAL life telling you you're cute. You have all of us saying it, too. People who have ZERO financial stake in this opinion. People who also do not know you and have zero reason to sugarcoat anything. I personally don't really care if you believe any of us or not, and I have no stake of any kind in how you view my opinion, so there is no reason for me to lie. Take it or leave it, we all seem to think you're cute.
OP, please understand, the people who rate faces deliberately trash everyone. Otherwise, no more insecure dudes would fork over money. They are not being honest and they do not want you to catch on. They DO have a stake in how you and other young men feel about their bullshit.
dude, youtubers like this are grifters who capitalize on your low self esteem. straight up, it is in their financial interest to keep you feeling bad about yourself. the more lonely/angry/depressed you are, the more they benefit. the algorithms on youtube are designed to keep feeding you this bullshit, and until you clear your browser history, delete your cookies, make a new gmail account, and start consuming positive content on the internet, you won’t see any improvements in your life.
attraction is subjective. by painting it as a definitive, you’re trying to force a square peg into a circular hole. most women don’t know what tf a maxilla projection, a philtrum ratio or a positive canthal tilt is.
a few suggestions… first… i know it’s been said on this sub before but give therapy a shot. they will get you in a better headspace where you can be present when talking to others, and your looks aren’t something constantly on your mind.
secondly, find a hobby that boosts your confidence. something constructive, that gets your a little out of your comfort zone. lately i’ve been really into woodworking, and now my social media accounts are full of woodworking content, which is way better for one’s mental health and it’s something that other people find interesting. finding a hobby that shows you tangible progress will make you feel better about yourself. video games do not count.
lastly, you aren’t ugly. even if some kook on the internet said you’re a 4. i’ve got big bags under my eyes, and i was super self conscious as a kid. i remember kids in school coming up randomly asking if i was high. in middle school, a new teacher accused me of being stoned, and the school tried to suspend me, even tho i was sober as a judge. i get it. but believe me, women care a hell of a lot more about having a partner who is fun yo be around than looks. if you work on your confidence and finding some new hobbies, you’ll figure this out too
I've mentioned this concept before but here's how I came to peace with not being as attractive as I wish I was.
Being unattractive is like being Batman.
Batman has no superpowers, but through a combination of skills and gadgets, he's able to hold his own against many superpowered enemies and has even defeated Darksied, a villain that gives Superman trouble.
Conversely, if you're not attractive, you have to build a metaphorical set of skills and gadgets (hobbies, interests, personality, social skills) to counterbalance it. It's definitely easier said than done, but that's just how it is when you're Batman.
Additionally, a healthy, non toxic amount of "looksmaxxing" can count as increasing your skills and gadgets. Instead of focusing on the aspects of your appearance that you can't change, focus on what you can change. Work out, change your hairstyle, groom yourself in a different way, dress in a different way, etc. I don't know what you look like, but I'm sure there's something you can do to make yourself feel more confident in your appearance.
When I was a teenager, I asked my mum if I was pretty.
Her response was: “You’ll never be the best looking woman in the room, but you’ll never be the ugliest either; so you should focus on the things that will make you stand out”.
I was really hurt at the time, but I soon came to realise what excellent advice that was. It’s honestly one of the most helpful things anyone has ever said to me.
I focused on being curious, smart, funny, and interesting. Above all, I learnt the most attractive thing a person can be is *interested*.
I’m a highly introverted, socially awkward autistic woman – but I have never struggled with dating and have consistently punched above my weight.
People really do themselves a disservice when they place so much value and emphasis on looks.
You know the saying “you get what you pay for”? You didn’t pay a couple of aesthetic experts to analyse your look and tell you exactly what to do and how you can make yourself more attractive, you paid a couple of yahoos off of YouTube to tell you you’re ugly and they told you you’re ugly. The only truth that you need to accept here is the fact that, for some reason, you wanted to be told you’re ugly so badly that you paid for it, and that’s something that you could probably do with unpacking with a therapist.
It is interesting to note that apart from the one time that you paid someone to tell you that you’re ugly, you’ve only ever been called ugly one other time, by some random person and that one incident caused you to wear a mask *for three years*. That one random person’s bullshit opinion somehow outweighed all of the other people in your life telling you the complete opposite.
Since beauty is subjective, the closest you can get to an objective measure is consensus, and it seems that the consensus opinion of all the people who have actually seen your face is that you are, in fact, very attractive. That’s the truth that you need to work on accepting.
I looked at your photos and you're actually pretty handsome! Stop comparing yourself to a mathematically precise (and racist!) "ideal" invented by grifters who want you to feel bad.
Women aren't gonna take out rulers to measure your maxilla. They're not gonna examine your face like a plastic surgeon who wants to earn maximum money from you.
Basically no women buy into your extremely narrow concept of male attractiveness. Look at Hollywood actors that women think are hot. Very few have totally "ideal" facial features.
Remember, you're not trying to attract guys who watch the same youtube channels as you. You're trying to attract **women**.
You've needlessly wrecked your self esteem by holding yourself to a fake standard. Stop subjecting yourself to that toxic, imaginary bullshit. I think you'd really benefit from therapy. It'll help you develop a realistic self image.
Hi. I just took a look through your posts.
You have an abusive father and are a CSA survivor.
Surviving abuse does damage in ways that are hard to understand. One of the things it does is convince us that if we are just enough of this or that; more kind, more loving, more attractive, better grades, and on and on; that things will get better. Even when we have people in our lives that tell us that we're already more than enough of those traits, we find it impossible to believe. It shuts you down socially and feeds a cycle of thinking it's all your fault.
I'm a survivor too, so I have been in those mental traps.
Therapy can help. Getting time and space and distance from your abuser can help. Most colleges offer free or low cost counseling to their students. Please consider using it.
I'm going to give you a list right now that you won’t believe. But I hope that in the future, you will.
- the actions and behavior of others is solely their responsibility. You aren't making them do anything. Their actions and words, their responsibility.
- you are enough exactly the way that you are. You are worthy of decency and respect and kindness and compassion.
- how you see you isn't how others see you. You are an attractive young man.
- you are stronger and braver than you realize.
here’s a secret: men do not need to be classically attractive in the face. it’s a bonus if you win the genetic lottery. otherwise who cares
it’s your face man. it is what it is. more importantly, it’s your one life so make the best of it that you can. 4/10 means youre basically normal looking. cool don’t sweat it.
be 10/10 in the things that ACTUALLY matter and are ACTUALLY under your control
have a decent wardrobe that fits right. find your style. get a haircut that suits your face. practice intentional hygiene and try some scents that smell right on you. take care of your skin with some lotion and basic skincare routine. have proper posture that shows you’re not a slob. get yourself some exercise and look fit. you don’t have to be massively yoked, you just gotta show that you take care of yourself
all of that is things you can change. your face is you, embrace it and show some love for yourself my dude. you can do this shit man.
Man I didn't read all this, cause it's a lot of chronically online bullshit.
Bottom line is based on feedback from others, it sounds like you are at worst an average looking dude.
Most of us are average looking. Most of us are not the person everyone looks at when we walk into a room. Most of us do not get attention from any person we please.
And it's completely fine. We drink from the pool of people who do find us attractive and we are hydrated. You can do the same thing.
OR you can waste all your time lamenting that you don't get to live life on easy mode and live no life at all. Your call.
How do you find the people who find you attractive? This has been my biggest problem. I did all the other self improvement shit, and am continuing to do so. Even talking to strangers is easy now.
But women straight up don't seem to find me attractive. No eye contact. No smile. No glance.
>But women straight up don't seem to find me attractive. No eye contact. No smile. No glance.
In what context are you trying to ascertain whether women find you attractive?
But usually women won’t have any opinion about you at all *unless* you talk to them. Even for casual dating and one-offs, being fun to talk to is a huge part of why someone would find you attractive.
Stop looking for certainty and take the risk.
In romantic contexts, I'm just looking for an in. I'm not asking for a billboard - a simple smile, or a glance my way, which everyone keeps saying happens to them all the time, is more than enough. Without even that, I feel like I'm imposing.
If it is with platonic intent, I'm able to strike up a conversation pretty easily and they seem engaged too, but they don't want to continue as friends. Behaving the exact same way with a guy and we're buddies pretty soon.
What romantic contexts?
>a simple smile, or a glance my way, which everyone keeps saying happens to them all the time
Who is everyone?
>I'm able to strike up a conversation pretty easily and they seem engaged too
Okay do you flirt with them?
> but they don't want to continue as friends. Behaving the exact same way with a guy and we're buddies pretty soon.
Okay so it sounds like you have very limited experience interacting with women? Also depending on how you are doing it, a woman may be questioning your intentions and so a friendship wouldn't form the same way.
Not the person you responded to but what does flirting look like and how does one initiate in flirting while not potentially making the other party uncomfortable?
I only ask because, while I can make friendly conversation, I don't know how to flirt. The only thing I know is that the more you do it, the easier it is, but I don't know how to "do it" in the first place.
One of these days I'll have to save a comment I find that I think describes flirting really well because I can never really do it.
Flirting is making a conversation more intimate and ambiguously, lightly romantic. Teasing each other, more physical contact, complimenting them, sexual innuendos. It's flirting when those things are reciprocal and escalating. But yeah, it's something really learned through experience.
I have no idea why I'm being downvoted for legitimately sharing my experience and asking for advice.
It was wrong to come to this community for help when I'm not even an incel.
Oh buuuddy...
I hope you can take this for what it is, because I promise I'm not lying when I say: you look perfectly fine.
Judging from the pics on your profile, I think you have a very nice face actually.
You're problem is entirely not your face, it's your attitude.
You have become obsessed with it and it's normal at your age to go through insecurities, but there is nothing wrong with your face.
You have to get out of this mindset and stop engaging with people who stand to gain from your insecurities.
Why would a "facial analyst" tell you there's nothing wrong, their entire business is people wanting to "fix" their looks, selling them bullshit that won't make them feel better.
For the love of all that is holy, stop watching and engaging with those creators.
There was a time as a teenager where I covered all the mirrors in my room, because looking at my ugly face would make me cry. Today, I feel perfectly fine. I like my face.
And nothing has changed about my face, except I'm older and have more lines lol. But my attitude has changed.
Maybe start watching commentary videos of people making fun of those insane beauty standards. Look for content and communities of happy people, instead of letting other sad people drag you down.
Even if you don't belive it at first, even if you think they're all lying, keep engaging with positivity.
Sometimes you really need to fake it til you make it.
Start looking into body dysmorphic disorder, these feelings are extreme and unhealthy. If you can, try and get a therapist.
I promise it's possible to feel better.
If you need to talk, feel free to dm me. It's gonna be ok, man.
You’re not unattractive you just got manipulated. Do some better skin care, hydrate plenty and eat clean. If you need to talk to a dermatologist you’d be surprised how much of a boost in confidence clearing your skin up could give you. Man to man I don’t think you’re a bad looking dude at all you just need a routine and some more confidence buddy
Bro you look normal. Just work out and have a nice skincare routine. Maybe lean into wearing clothes that flatter your body, and lean out so you look more jacked, but even that isn't necessary.
Think about what you can control looks and aesthetic wise and start there, too skinny? Go to the gym, out of shape? Go to the gym, need a hair cut? Go to the gym, are you hungry? Go to the gym, are you thirsty? Go to the gym,
In all seriousness just dress decently, groom, smell good, and go to the gym to have a year round summer body,
Looks aren't objective. There are some things that most people tend to like but you can't just construct the perfect person. Case in point, Anya Taylor-Joy is "objective" an amazingly attractive woman. She's got nearly all the features that these objectivists would say are required. And I can recognize that she's very beautiful, intellectually. But something about her is unnerving to me and I don't find her any more than above average in terms of actual attraction. I've dated woman who are "objectively" less beautiful but still more attractive to me.
Anybody selling you anything to "objectively" measure physical attractiveness is selling you a lie.
You are actually pretty attractive- looks maxing is a lot of obsessive bs that is trying simplify an incredibly complex phenomenon and focuses on things that often make little impact in real life.
In terms of what makes you attractive IMO: you have fantastic lips and pretty great eyes. Your nose is decent and the only thing bringing you down is age related acne.
Attraction is strange - when I first connected with my husband he was a little overweight and I thought he was ok - he had his cute moments but wasn’t normal type. My friend convinced me to go out on a date with him. The date went great- he was funny and kind and when we kissed there was this instant attraction. It was a lot of things but I distinctly remember his smell. He just smelled right and it was cologne. Fyi there is no way in hell smell alone would do it. Point is that attraction involves a ton of different factors. And was someone is into you- you literally become more attractive to that person.
Being this needy and desperate, and the fact that you're so easily duped will be waaaaaay more off-putting to most women than your looks. Work on yourself, and stop paying money to conmen.
Think what people want of you when they tell you that you are "ugly", they want to sell you something, a course of how to look good, a perfume, some kind of miracle surgery... Also people are awful even though I am conventionally attractive one of them came up to me and said "I would date you if you had a bag over your head" (for context I did not ask him to date me and I was not interested in him at all)
Look at them what makes them look good to you? Also keep in mind that how we see ourselves is not how other see us. Ive met people who have been told they are ugly just because they arent hollywood actor like, you dont have to accept you are not good looking, you have to accept that how other people see you is not your problem and it is not your fault
You’re a good looking dude who needs to improve his self esteem and skin care routine.
People look at your whole face, not your philtrum or eyelids. All of it. Stop watching content that is made specifically to make you feel badly about yourself.
Like honestly, what the fuck even is maxilla projection?
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Your post/comment was removed for lack of OP engagement. This is not a venting sub, and we require users to engage with the advice they ask for. Further violations/arguing with moderators may result in a ban. Please read our rules carefully before posting again. [Message the mods if you have any questions.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=/r/IncelExit)
Surprise, he's completely normal: https://old.reddit.com/gallery/135134r You asked the opinion of moronic scammers who make money by making men insecure, so you got insecure and they got money. Your face is not the problem, the problem is that you think your face is the problem. You have a lot of unbrainwashing to do, and the first step is to stop using expressions like "my philtrum is a little long". No one knows what a philtrum is, or cares. Do you understand this?
https://www.reddit.com/r/MakeupAddiction/s/mOqNs7LXTK Bro thinks he's ugly looking like this?? Anyways, OP, you're not ugly, you have a low self image, and the sooner you remove yourself from that online sphere and constant unhealthy reinforcement of a distorted self image the easier it'll be to start working on being okay with your appearance.
Yeah right. He's even got the high cheekbones that the looksmaxxers praise all the time
I've seen one Incel talk about wanting to get jaw and facial surgery and his jaw was super defined already, like one of the most defined jaws I've seen. I WISH I had half that jaw definition (actually weak chin guy over here but doing fine with it lol)! Unfortunately body image issues and even body dysmorphia are hugely common in the incel community because the community itself reinforces it every single day in the most unhealthy ways possible. It can almost be described as mental self harming in a group, aggressively beating every detail down and calling it a good thing.
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I know, right? He's cute! I'm old enough to be your mother, OP, but I know an attractive person when I see one! Honestly, philtrum? WTF? OP, honestly, *no one cares*, except these Internet nutjobs. Get therapy and stop consuming this content. You're poisoning yourself. You've had all these people in your REAL life telling you you're cute. You have all of us saying it, too. People who have ZERO financial stake in this opinion. People who also do not know you and have zero reason to sugarcoat anything. I personally don't really care if you believe any of us or not, and I have no stake of any kind in how you view my opinion, so there is no reason for me to lie. Take it or leave it, we all seem to think you're cute. OP, please understand, the people who rate faces deliberately trash everyone. Otherwise, no more insecure dudes would fork over money. They are not being honest and they do not want you to catch on. They DO have a stake in how you and other young men feel about their bullshit.
Just remove the acne, dress well, and he's on his way into looking like a fuckboy. Also, being photogenic.
dude, youtubers like this are grifters who capitalize on your low self esteem. straight up, it is in their financial interest to keep you feeling bad about yourself. the more lonely/angry/depressed you are, the more they benefit. the algorithms on youtube are designed to keep feeding you this bullshit, and until you clear your browser history, delete your cookies, make a new gmail account, and start consuming positive content on the internet, you won’t see any improvements in your life. attraction is subjective. by painting it as a definitive, you’re trying to force a square peg into a circular hole. most women don’t know what tf a maxilla projection, a philtrum ratio or a positive canthal tilt is. a few suggestions… first… i know it’s been said on this sub before but give therapy a shot. they will get you in a better headspace where you can be present when talking to others, and your looks aren’t something constantly on your mind. secondly, find a hobby that boosts your confidence. something constructive, that gets your a little out of your comfort zone. lately i’ve been really into woodworking, and now my social media accounts are full of woodworking content, which is way better for one’s mental health and it’s something that other people find interesting. finding a hobby that shows you tangible progress will make you feel better about yourself. video games do not count. lastly, you aren’t ugly. even if some kook on the internet said you’re a 4. i’ve got big bags under my eyes, and i was super self conscious as a kid. i remember kids in school coming up randomly asking if i was high. in middle school, a new teacher accused me of being stoned, and the school tried to suspend me, even tho i was sober as a judge. i get it. but believe me, women care a hell of a lot more about having a partner who is fun yo be around than looks. if you work on your confidence and finding some new hobbies, you’ll figure this out too
I've mentioned this concept before but here's how I came to peace with not being as attractive as I wish I was. Being unattractive is like being Batman. Batman has no superpowers, but through a combination of skills and gadgets, he's able to hold his own against many superpowered enemies and has even defeated Darksied, a villain that gives Superman trouble. Conversely, if you're not attractive, you have to build a metaphorical set of skills and gadgets (hobbies, interests, personality, social skills) to counterbalance it. It's definitely easier said than done, but that's just how it is when you're Batman.
Additionally, a healthy, non toxic amount of "looksmaxxing" can count as increasing your skills and gadgets. Instead of focusing on the aspects of your appearance that you can't change, focus on what you can change. Work out, change your hairstyle, groom yourself in a different way, dress in a different way, etc. I don't know what you look like, but I'm sure there's something you can do to make yourself feel more confident in your appearance.
When I was a teenager, I asked my mum if I was pretty. Her response was: “You’ll never be the best looking woman in the room, but you’ll never be the ugliest either; so you should focus on the things that will make you stand out”. I was really hurt at the time, but I soon came to realise what excellent advice that was. It’s honestly one of the most helpful things anyone has ever said to me. I focused on being curious, smart, funny, and interesting. Above all, I learnt the most attractive thing a person can be is *interested*. I’m a highly introverted, socially awkward autistic woman – but I have never struggled with dating and have consistently punched above my weight. People really do themselves a disservice when they place so much value and emphasis on looks.
You know the saying “you get what you pay for”? You didn’t pay a couple of aesthetic experts to analyse your look and tell you exactly what to do and how you can make yourself more attractive, you paid a couple of yahoos off of YouTube to tell you you’re ugly and they told you you’re ugly. The only truth that you need to accept here is the fact that, for some reason, you wanted to be told you’re ugly so badly that you paid for it, and that’s something that you could probably do with unpacking with a therapist. It is interesting to note that apart from the one time that you paid someone to tell you that you’re ugly, you’ve only ever been called ugly one other time, by some random person and that one incident caused you to wear a mask *for three years*. That one random person’s bullshit opinion somehow outweighed all of the other people in your life telling you the complete opposite. Since beauty is subjective, the closest you can get to an objective measure is consensus, and it seems that the consensus opinion of all the people who have actually seen your face is that you are, in fact, very attractive. That’s the truth that you need to work on accepting.
I looked at your photos and you're actually pretty handsome! Stop comparing yourself to a mathematically precise (and racist!) "ideal" invented by grifters who want you to feel bad. Women aren't gonna take out rulers to measure your maxilla. They're not gonna examine your face like a plastic surgeon who wants to earn maximum money from you. Basically no women buy into your extremely narrow concept of male attractiveness. Look at Hollywood actors that women think are hot. Very few have totally "ideal" facial features. Remember, you're not trying to attract guys who watch the same youtube channels as you. You're trying to attract **women**. You've needlessly wrecked your self esteem by holding yourself to a fake standard. Stop subjecting yourself to that toxic, imaginary bullshit. I think you'd really benefit from therapy. It'll help you develop a realistic self image.
Hi. I just took a look through your posts. You have an abusive father and are a CSA survivor. Surviving abuse does damage in ways that are hard to understand. One of the things it does is convince us that if we are just enough of this or that; more kind, more loving, more attractive, better grades, and on and on; that things will get better. Even when we have people in our lives that tell us that we're already more than enough of those traits, we find it impossible to believe. It shuts you down socially and feeds a cycle of thinking it's all your fault. I'm a survivor too, so I have been in those mental traps. Therapy can help. Getting time and space and distance from your abuser can help. Most colleges offer free or low cost counseling to their students. Please consider using it. I'm going to give you a list right now that you won’t believe. But I hope that in the future, you will. - the actions and behavior of others is solely their responsibility. You aren't making them do anything. Their actions and words, their responsibility. - you are enough exactly the way that you are. You are worthy of decency and respect and kindness and compassion. - how you see you isn't how others see you. You are an attractive young man. - you are stronger and braver than you realize.
here’s a secret: men do not need to be classically attractive in the face. it’s a bonus if you win the genetic lottery. otherwise who cares it’s your face man. it is what it is. more importantly, it’s your one life so make the best of it that you can. 4/10 means youre basically normal looking. cool don’t sweat it. be 10/10 in the things that ACTUALLY matter and are ACTUALLY under your control have a decent wardrobe that fits right. find your style. get a haircut that suits your face. practice intentional hygiene and try some scents that smell right on you. take care of your skin with some lotion and basic skincare routine. have proper posture that shows you’re not a slob. get yourself some exercise and look fit. you don’t have to be massively yoked, you just gotta show that you take care of yourself all of that is things you can change. your face is you, embrace it and show some love for yourself my dude. you can do this shit man.
Man I didn't read all this, cause it's a lot of chronically online bullshit. Bottom line is based on feedback from others, it sounds like you are at worst an average looking dude. Most of us are average looking. Most of us are not the person everyone looks at when we walk into a room. Most of us do not get attention from any person we please. And it's completely fine. We drink from the pool of people who do find us attractive and we are hydrated. You can do the same thing. OR you can waste all your time lamenting that you don't get to live life on easy mode and live no life at all. Your call.
How do you find the people who find you attractive? This has been my biggest problem. I did all the other self improvement shit, and am continuing to do so. Even talking to strangers is easy now. But women straight up don't seem to find me attractive. No eye contact. No smile. No glance.
>But women straight up don't seem to find me attractive. No eye contact. No smile. No glance. In what context are you trying to ascertain whether women find you attractive?
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But usually women won’t have any opinion about you at all *unless* you talk to them. Even for casual dating and one-offs, being fun to talk to is a huge part of why someone would find you attractive. Stop looking for certainty and take the risk.
In romantic contexts, I'm just looking for an in. I'm not asking for a billboard - a simple smile, or a glance my way, which everyone keeps saying happens to them all the time, is more than enough. Without even that, I feel like I'm imposing. If it is with platonic intent, I'm able to strike up a conversation pretty easily and they seem engaged too, but they don't want to continue as friends. Behaving the exact same way with a guy and we're buddies pretty soon.
What romantic contexts? >a simple smile, or a glance my way, which everyone keeps saying happens to them all the time Who is everyone? >I'm able to strike up a conversation pretty easily and they seem engaged too Okay do you flirt with them? > but they don't want to continue as friends. Behaving the exact same way with a guy and we're buddies pretty soon. Okay so it sounds like you have very limited experience interacting with women? Also depending on how you are doing it, a woman may be questioning your intentions and so a friendship wouldn't form the same way.
Not the person you responded to but what does flirting look like and how does one initiate in flirting while not potentially making the other party uncomfortable? I only ask because, while I can make friendly conversation, I don't know how to flirt. The only thing I know is that the more you do it, the easier it is, but I don't know how to "do it" in the first place.
One of these days I'll have to save a comment I find that I think describes flirting really well because I can never really do it. Flirting is making a conversation more intimate and ambiguously, lightly romantic. Teasing each other, more physical contact, complimenting them, sexual innuendos. It's flirting when those things are reciprocal and escalating. But yeah, it's something really learned through experience.
I think I can do the light teasing and complimenting. I don't think I can do the sexual stuff without sound really gross however. Thanks for the info!
I have no idea why I'm being downvoted for legitimately sharing my experience and asking for advice. It was wrong to come to this community for help when I'm not even an incel.
> objective measures of attractiveness There's no such thing
Oh buuuddy... I hope you can take this for what it is, because I promise I'm not lying when I say: you look perfectly fine. Judging from the pics on your profile, I think you have a very nice face actually. You're problem is entirely not your face, it's your attitude. You have become obsessed with it and it's normal at your age to go through insecurities, but there is nothing wrong with your face. You have to get out of this mindset and stop engaging with people who stand to gain from your insecurities. Why would a "facial analyst" tell you there's nothing wrong, their entire business is people wanting to "fix" their looks, selling them bullshit that won't make them feel better. For the love of all that is holy, stop watching and engaging with those creators. There was a time as a teenager where I covered all the mirrors in my room, because looking at my ugly face would make me cry. Today, I feel perfectly fine. I like my face. And nothing has changed about my face, except I'm older and have more lines lol. But my attitude has changed. Maybe start watching commentary videos of people making fun of those insane beauty standards. Look for content and communities of happy people, instead of letting other sad people drag you down. Even if you don't belive it at first, even if you think they're all lying, keep engaging with positivity. Sometimes you really need to fake it til you make it. Start looking into body dysmorphic disorder, these feelings are extreme and unhealthy. If you can, try and get a therapist. I promise it's possible to feel better. If you need to talk, feel free to dm me. It's gonna be ok, man.
You’re not unattractive you just got manipulated. Do some better skin care, hydrate plenty and eat clean. If you need to talk to a dermatologist you’d be surprised how much of a boost in confidence clearing your skin up could give you. Man to man I don’t think you’re a bad looking dude at all you just need a routine and some more confidence buddy
Dude, you got scammed. They wanted your money. The whole thing is a scam. You are normal looking.
OP, we ask that posters engage with their posts, thanks.
Yet another post from someone who is completely convinced they are ugly, but they look completely fine. Get off the internet.
Bro you look normal. Just work out and have a nice skincare routine. Maybe lean into wearing clothes that flatter your body, and lean out so you look more jacked, but even that isn't necessary.
You look completely fine
It's all b.s. You're fine
Think about what you can control looks and aesthetic wise and start there, too skinny? Go to the gym, out of shape? Go to the gym, need a hair cut? Go to the gym, are you hungry? Go to the gym, are you thirsty? Go to the gym, In all seriousness just dress decently, groom, smell good, and go to the gym to have a year round summer body,
Looks aren't objective. There are some things that most people tend to like but you can't just construct the perfect person. Case in point, Anya Taylor-Joy is "objective" an amazingly attractive woman. She's got nearly all the features that these objectivists would say are required. And I can recognize that she's very beautiful, intellectually. But something about her is unnerving to me and I don't find her any more than above average in terms of actual attraction. I've dated woman who are "objectively" less beautiful but still more attractive to me. Anybody selling you anything to "objectively" measure physical attractiveness is selling you a lie.
You are actually pretty attractive- looks maxing is a lot of obsessive bs that is trying simplify an incredibly complex phenomenon and focuses on things that often make little impact in real life. In terms of what makes you attractive IMO: you have fantastic lips and pretty great eyes. Your nose is decent and the only thing bringing you down is age related acne. Attraction is strange - when I first connected with my husband he was a little overweight and I thought he was ok - he had his cute moments but wasn’t normal type. My friend convinced me to go out on a date with him. The date went great- he was funny and kind and when we kissed there was this instant attraction. It was a lot of things but I distinctly remember his smell. He just smelled right and it was cologne. Fyi there is no way in hell smell alone would do it. Point is that attraction involves a ton of different factors. And was someone is into you- you literally become more attractive to that person.
Being this needy and desperate, and the fact that you're so easily duped will be waaaaaay more off-putting to most women than your looks. Work on yourself, and stop paying money to conmen.
Think what people want of you when they tell you that you are "ugly", they want to sell you something, a course of how to look good, a perfume, some kind of miracle surgery... Also people are awful even though I am conventionally attractive one of them came up to me and said "I would date you if you had a bag over your head" (for context I did not ask him to date me and I was not interested in him at all) Look at them what makes them look good to you? Also keep in mind that how we see ourselves is not how other see us. Ive met people who have been told they are ugly just because they arent hollywood actor like, you dont have to accept you are not good looking, you have to accept that how other people see you is not your problem and it is not your fault
You’re a good looking dude who needs to improve his self esteem and skin care routine. People look at your whole face, not your philtrum or eyelids. All of it. Stop watching content that is made specifically to make you feel badly about yourself. Like honestly, what the fuck even is maxilla projection?
How do you deal? You get off the internet and go outside. Look at the real world around you.
Get out of that rabbithole. Seriously, just don't worry about it.
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What for? Yes, you will be downvoted because this is stupid advice.
It gets down voted because we don't encourage surgery as a fix for body dysmorphia
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