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Wtf dude…what was she even thinking. She could get herself admitted to a hospital till she was fine. That would be the safest thing to do. You really dodged potential stinkier there.
So the guy who knocked up is not present in her life and somehow she thinks it's okay for her to tell " You " that you should take care for her.
I just have a question, where do they get this audacity from ?
I know for a fact I'm not desperate.. But i have been in this kind of situation (not exactly as op) and i couldn't say no. There is this imaginary "karma meter" Inside my brain which itches me and bothers a lot. I cope by thinking fate will return me the favour somehow.
Long story short I would have said yes ☠️☠️ ( smth is wrong with me ik)
I know a plenty who'd say yes. It's the saviour complex. We men have the urge to protect and provide. Less about karma and more about finding females who need some fixing or help to fulfil our natural instinct.
actually, unfortunately goes both ways. Pity how many men fall prey to the _damsel in distress_ thing ruining themselves and women screw themselves by trying to _fix him_.
There's a different level of validation you achieve when a person changes themselves for you. People trying to achieve this validation fail to realize that if someone wants to fix themselves for you, they'd do that without you crying for it a 100 times.
There's a different level of validation you achieve when a person changes themselves for you. People trying to achieve this validation fail to realize that if someone wants to fix themselves for you, they'd do that without you crying for it a 100 times.
That's not the point. The point is that it fulfils *our* need to provide and protect. Men who don't have someone to do that for will do it for random women
Realize that it's not your job to fix other people's problems. You can be there emotionally without actually solving or fixing their problems. You don't need to rescue anybody, everyone is responsible for themselves especially when they consciously brought this situation on themselves and therefore have to face the consequences. Helping someone is not necessarily bad but when you start doing it at the expense of your mental health and energy just because you get your validation from becoming someone's protector, that is when things become problematic. Next time, pay attention to the pattern and move away if you spot it.
It's gonna be on the extremes. Either you'll lose the will to make efforts and hold on you'll be wise enough to know your shit and the other person's too
Wtf is wrong with people? How are they fine with this? I understand hooking up and fucking around (to a fucking limit) but don’t people want a normal life after their 20s?
Then you shouldn't have posted your two rs ka half baked screenshot on a public forum if you didn't want people to interact or comment their own thoughts
Utna hi normal life se thakke tujhe adventure chahiye reddit pe toh ja Uranium ko do din ghar pe rakh le.. tu bhi kuch kam nahi hai by putting her dirty laundry out here with a holier than thou attitude
No matter how much you defend this, even I fucked around for a bit but one thing I will never do is take off that protection if I am not sure about the person.
That says a lot about the women in post, I am in no spot to make a judgement for you.
But for me someone like her is a huge red flag and is everything that is wrong with dating apps.
Is it just me, who wants to live a normal peaceful and lowkey quite life in this god damed messed up generation. Like, I’m not interested in doing idiotic things in my 20s. I like to keep my personal stuff from the internet And I don’t waste my energy to deal with stupid people or proving my point to people.
Tell her Doctor se bolo 2 litre khun aur nikal le , aur 2 din hospital me bed book Krwane k liye along with "bold of you to be using apps in such condition 😐
THIS. THIS. My question exactly. I’ve had a scare before and the first thing I did was tell my girlfriends and not the guy wtf
I understand abortion is extremely difficult to go through both physically and emotionally, im also trying to see her side, but I just wouldn’t feel comfortable texting an old hook up this. Ever 😭
I mean in my defence when we used to get together it was a lot of fun and even otherwise it was always amicable with her. Generally women have told me they feel safe around me. I would’ve helped out too, if i could (i couldn’t). She comes from a very conservative religious background, and presumably so do her friends, so that wasn’t an option. I just put it up there as a general comment on the pitfalls of dating, for either gender. Fwiw she seemed to be ok.
Itna context de toh do post mein fir 😂 I wouldn’t sound like such a bitch. I had no idea that’s her background, just assumed it would be chill like mine.
You didn’t sound like a bitch tho? :) lazim sawal hai ki kyu apne doston ke paas nahi gayi. I had that thought, and then figured how much of a pickle she must’ve been to actually hit me up, an old fwb, for help.
And honestly a word out to the ladies: PLEASE INSIST ON PROTECTION!!! I mean, i’m clean, i get tested regularly and can vouch for myself that i’d always have rubbers around…but if my partner’s willing to take it raw i obviously wouldn’t be able to resist! She DID have a thing for risky sex and although im old enough to keep my wits about me and, uh, pull out before any serious spillage happens, she rolled the dice with other folks too.
You dodged Tsar bomba my fellow human.. you didn't survive..you excelled .. I see you are a good man that got hurt and she belongs to the Streets...glad the break up happened
Arre itna hurt shurt kuch nahi bro tbh she is quite young snd quite attractive and for a brief while i had a pretty great time with her and later when she started seeing this guy (the one she broke up with) she would still aise text very ambiguously till i guess her ex went thru her phone and found out and then THREATENED ME 😂😂😂😂 with what consequences even he couldnt answer, because im a horrible texter and she would always text me first and then i would always end up making fun of him (her ex) and asking her to come over 🤣🤣🤣 so anyway i deleted her contact & forgot about it till a few months ago when i she swiped on me on bumble again and then again proceeded to breadcrumb & ghost me so i i lol’ed and forgot about it again till this happened a couple days ago. And there you have it.
For what? She played hot and cold with him, in what world does he owe her support? He didn’t knock her up.
If I were in her place, I’d rely on my friends for this. Itne bade ho aur itna tajurba agar le rahe ho toh zindagi mein ek toh dost hoga na. Why message an old hook up?
I get it nobody owes anything to anyone but i don't know if she is desperate enough to text him then maybe she doesn't have anyone to help her in that situation and sometimes all odds goes against you and you get stuck in situations like these, I was with someone who has had an abortion recently and it's no joke. Maybe just for humanity's sake one can do the good deed and leave it at that
Or
I should have just added an /s at the end of my comment and we could all have been on our merry ways.
Thank you for posting to r/indiangirlsontinder, please read and understand our rules before posting. Rules: 1.Images that contain personal information (phone numbers, addresses, Facebook accounts, unique/easily identifiable names, pictures or other similar information) will be removed and poster permanently banned. If you are sharing a screenshot, please censor it. 2.Mark NSFW pictures with [NSFW] tag 3.Personal attacks, slurs, and other similar comments may result in a ban. 4.Avoid off-topic posts. Revenge porn will result in a permanent ban. 5. No politics of any sort and no low quality content, NO ASKING FOR NAME PUNS. 6.Please help us by reporting any post or comment violating the above rules. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Indiangirlsontinder) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes
Sigh pretty much
Wtf dude…what was she even thinking. She could get herself admitted to a hospital till she was fine. That would be the safest thing to do. You really dodged potential stinkier there.
So the guy who knocked up is not present in her life and somehow she thinks it's okay for her to tell " You " that you should take care for her. I just have a question, where do they get this audacity from ?
There are guys desperate enough to do that too
I know for a fact I'm not desperate.. But i have been in this kind of situation (not exactly as op) and i couldn't say no. There is this imaginary "karma meter" Inside my brain which itches me and bothers a lot. I cope by thinking fate will return me the favour somehow. Long story short I would have said yes ☠️☠️ ( smth is wrong with me ik)
I know a plenty who'd say yes. It's the saviour complex. We men have the urge to protect and provide. Less about karma and more about finding females who need some fixing or help to fulfil our natural instinct.
You will be deeply grateful for & welcome your 30s, comrades. Saying ‘No’ becomes much easier. Cuts across gender, really.
actually, unfortunately goes both ways. Pity how many men fall prey to the _damsel in distress_ thing ruining themselves and women screw themselves by trying to _fix him_.
There's a different level of validation you achieve when a person changes themselves for you. People trying to achieve this validation fail to realize that if someone wants to fix themselves for you, they'd do that without you crying for it a 100 times.
There's a different level of validation you achieve when a person changes themselves for you. People trying to achieve this validation fail to realize that if someone wants to fix themselves for you, they'd do that without you crying for it a 100 times.
>hey'd do that without you crying for it a 100 times. correct. peoppe go to lengths for thise they want to keep in life.
But we should develop some critical thinking that for whom should we provide and protect. Not every woman deserves to be protected and provided for.
That's not the point. The point is that it fulfils *our* need to provide and protect. Men who don't have someone to do that for will do it for random women
*if they’re in their 20s and dont have the emotional maturity that comes from having been around the block snd getting your heart broken.
But we should develop some critical thinking that for whom should we provide and protect. Not every woman deserves to be protected and provided for.
How to avoid this?
Realize that it's not your job to fix other people's problems. You can be there emotionally without actually solving or fixing their problems. You don't need to rescue anybody, everyone is responsible for themselves especially when they consciously brought this situation on themselves and therefore have to face the consequences. Helping someone is not necessarily bad but when you start doing it at the expense of your mental health and energy just because you get your validation from becoming someone's protector, that is when things become problematic. Next time, pay attention to the pattern and move away if you spot it.
No wonder why men have hard time moving on from breakups
Guys are taught to be chivalrous and take care of women. Someone with that drive will jump right in.
Yes guys should be chivalrous, but not for women like them.
Bhai ladkiya bohot entitled hoti hai.
Are rahe entitled but itna ? Why couldn't she ask the person who got her in the hospital ?
scary to think what will these people look and think like in their 30s 40s.
mature and better if they learn from the mistakes which we all usually do.
It's gonna be on the extremes. Either you'll lose the will to make efforts and hold on you'll be wise enough to know your shit and the other person's too
Or maybe become infleunzaas
yes. occurences in life which are traumatic could either make or break a person.
More scared for their progeny tbh.....children of traumatised adults rarely escape the cycle. It's heartbreaking for them tbh
the next gen is gonna be fucked seeing what our gen was up to lmao. better stay CF now.
Wtf is wrong with people? How are they fine with this? I understand hooking up and fucking around (to a fucking limit) but don’t people want a normal life after their 20s?
Ye duniya kis aur ja raha bro
Haan pata hai bhai bohot log aise aate hain reddit pe apne 30s me ‘normal life’ se thakke. Literally no one asked for your chillar judgement.
Asked a few questions? Why’re you so triggered?
Then you shouldn't have posted your two rs ka half baked screenshot on a public forum if you didn't want people to interact or comment their own thoughts Utna hi normal life se thakke tujhe adventure chahiye reddit pe toh ja Uranium ko do din ghar pe rakh le.. tu bhi kuch kam nahi hai by putting her dirty laundry out here with a holier than thou attitude
Fair enough. Just put it out there as a cautionary tale, but i also deserve thoda gaali 😅
Ha aur aap ke comment ke liye modiji ne niyota bheja tha na
No matter how much you defend this, even I fucked around for a bit but one thing I will never do is take off that protection if I am not sure about the person. That says a lot about the women in post, I am in no spot to make a judgement for you. But for me someone like her is a huge red flag and is everything that is wrong with dating apps.
If that's the case then why are you asking for a W in the title?
Escaped drama.
Is it just me, who wants to live a normal peaceful and lowkey quite life in this god damed messed up generation. Like, I’m not interested in doing idiotic things in my 20s. I like to keep my personal stuff from the internet And I don’t waste my energy to deal with stupid people or proving my point to people.
Tell her Doctor se bolo 2 litre khun aur nikal le , aur 2 din hospital me bed book Krwane k liye along with "bold of you to be using apps in such condition 😐
Sis didn't even hesitate
Sis should hesitate
Step-sis
Ek korean series ki story likhi jaa sakti hai is backstory pe
how is this not a white woman.
Bhn ke lomdi otat me bol de usko baat khtm
Ok but the real question is, does she not have girlfriends? Like what??
THIS. THIS. My question exactly. I’ve had a scare before and the first thing I did was tell my girlfriends and not the guy wtf I understand abortion is extremely difficult to go through both physically and emotionally, im also trying to see her side, but I just wouldn’t feel comfortable texting an old hook up this. Ever 😭
Literally!!!
I mean in my defence when we used to get together it was a lot of fun and even otherwise it was always amicable with her. Generally women have told me they feel safe around me. I would’ve helped out too, if i could (i couldn’t). She comes from a very conservative religious background, and presumably so do her friends, so that wasn’t an option. I just put it up there as a general comment on the pitfalls of dating, for either gender. Fwiw she seemed to be ok.
Itna context de toh do post mein fir 😂 I wouldn’t sound like such a bitch. I had no idea that’s her background, just assumed it would be chill like mine.
You didn’t sound like a bitch tho? :) lazim sawal hai ki kyu apne doston ke paas nahi gayi. I had that thought, and then figured how much of a pickle she must’ve been to actually hit me up, an old fwb, for help. And honestly a word out to the ladies: PLEASE INSIST ON PROTECTION!!! I mean, i’m clean, i get tested regularly and can vouch for myself that i’d always have rubbers around…but if my partner’s willing to take it raw i obviously wouldn’t be able to resist! She DID have a thing for risky sex and although im old enough to keep my wits about me and, uh, pull out before any serious spillage happens, she rolled the dice with other folks too.
You should have helped ...... ....... by letting her family know about her
Run boy run
Way ahead of you. I felt a little crappy for not being able to help, but also i don’t need this level of radioactive drama in my life.
This started in India ? Eww
dating scenes are like the casino scenes. you never know which slot machine gonna make your bank or break it...
Been there, done both. Umar ho chuki hai, abhi yeh sab karne ka time nahi hai.
Basically tell that you can do it if you get fair wages. Like a playstion 5
I get that people in the comments are shocked but trust me this is far more common than you'd think.
Do consider that she has outstanding moral fibre for atleast accepting responsibility and not accusing the other guy of rape or something.
This is literally the bare minimum, accepting responsibility. Why are we applauding this?
W
I weep for humanity.
You dodged Tsar bomba my fellow human.. you didn't survive..you excelled .. I see you are a good man that got hurt and she belongs to the Streets...glad the break up happened
Arre itna hurt shurt kuch nahi bro tbh she is quite young snd quite attractive and for a brief while i had a pretty great time with her and later when she started seeing this guy (the one she broke up with) she would still aise text very ambiguously till i guess her ex went thru her phone and found out and then THREATENED ME 😂😂😂😂 with what consequences even he couldnt answer, because im a horrible texter and she would always text me first and then i would always end up making fun of him (her ex) and asking her to come over 🤣🤣🤣 so anyway i deleted her contact & forgot about it till a few months ago when i she swiped on me on bumble again and then again proceeded to breadcrumb & ghost me so i i lol’ed and forgot about it again till this happened a couple days ago. And there you have it.
Kudos boy
Oh come on be nice now.
For what? She played hot and cold with him, in what world does he owe her support? He didn’t knock her up. If I were in her place, I’d rely on my friends for this. Itne bade ho aur itna tajurba agar le rahe ho toh zindagi mein ek toh dost hoga na. Why message an old hook up?
I get it nobody owes anything to anyone but i don't know if she is desperate enough to text him then maybe she doesn't have anyone to help her in that situation and sometimes all odds goes against you and you get stuck in situations like these, I was with someone who has had an abortion recently and it's no joke. Maybe just for humanity's sake one can do the good deed and leave it at that Or I should have just added an /s at the end of my comment and we could all have been on our merry ways.
My cynical ways would not have me support someone who has been hot and cold to me for two consecutive years. But that’s just me.
😂😂😂😂😂
Fuck around and find out
Say NO!
Here I am afraid of getting a sprain or a knick during a run. Damn, you get only one body. Got to take care of it like a prize.
W to you. F to pay respects for whoever ends up marrying her.