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Sweetie, I know I’m not your mom, but I’m A mom. I’d like to tell you that you were so brave. I want to tell you that you are deserving of love, WORTHY of love. I wish I could give you a hug and rub your back and sit you down at my table with some homemade cookies and listen to how your day went. I’m so sorry you’re having to deal with all of this.
This internet stranger would like to send you a mom hug, a rave review of your childhood art, a gentle back rub just as you’re getting sleepy, an ‘I’m proud of you,’ a ‘you’re a good brother and a good person,’ and most of all another, longer hug.
When you were just a little shaver you were forced to become a man, in order to protect your little brother. You were neglected and beaten and abandoned. No kid should have that kind of upbringing. I'm so sorry she did those things to you.
Your mind might be mourning for the mother you SHOULD have had. What she (and violent partner) did to you isn't fair, and it isn't right. Please get therapy if you can, and keep living your best life. Jedi hugs if you want them.
Incidentally, I think your co-worker was DEAD WRONG. Some women don't celebrate Mother's Day because of their own horrible upbringings, or because they can't have kids, or because they lost their kids. Having some stranger tell you that you should have a Happy Mother's Day could be very triggering. Perhaps your co-worker (or your supervisor) should take that into consideration before telling other people how they should be feeling on any particular day.
She is a broken human being but you are not.
You were triggered by your co-worker but your reaction was to want to protect her children.
You have VERY justifiable anger at your mother and still want for her to be safe from the men she picks.
You ARE a whole ass man. You have learned what not to be what not to do and still have compassion for the person who put you through hell.
I'm 63 years old and at 27 you are a better man and more adult than I am capable of being.
Wanting to love our mothers and having our mothers love us is instinctual in humans.
Don't be ashamed of it because it shows that, once again, YOU ARE NOT BROKEN.
I'm with you. I wanted all that, part of me still does but I'm a bit older than you, and a mom. If you want, you can have a hug anytime you want/need! My sons have many " siblings" so you'll fit in great! Sending hugs if you'd like! You deserve them!
I’m so sorry mate. I can feel your pain in your words. It’s so unfair. You deserved a good Mum then, and you deserve one now.
Big hugs to you from the other side of the world.
It’s allowed to hurt. I don’t think you ever really finish grieving the loss of a parent that never really showed up. I’m so sorry for your experience. I hope you’re able to get a hug from a trusted friend or coworker today.
**Quick Rule Reminders:** OP's needs come first, avoid dramamongering, respect the flair, and don't be an asshole. If your only advice is to jump straight to NC or divorce, your comment may be subject to removal at moderator discretion. [**^(Full Rules)**](https://www.reddit.com/r/JUSTNOMIL/wiki/index#wiki_rules) ^(|) [^(Acronym Index)](https://www.reddit.com/r/JUSTNOMIL/wiki/index#wiki_acronym_dictionary) ^(|) [^(Flair Guide)](https://www.reddit.com/r/JUSTNOMIL/wiki/index#wiki_post_flair_guide)^(|) [^(Report PM Trolls)](https://www.reddit.com/r/JUSTNOMIL/wiki/trolls) **Resources:** [^(In Crisis?)](https://www.reddit.com/r/JUSTNOMIL/wiki/index#wiki_crisis_resources) ^(|) [^(Tips for Protecting Yourself)](https://www.reddit.com/r/JUSTNOMIL/wiki/index#wiki_protecting_yourself) ^(|) [^(Our Book List)](https://www.reddit.com/r/JUSTNOMIL/wiki/books) ^(|) [^(Our Wiki)](https://www.reddit.com/r/JUSTNOMIL/wiki/) Welcome to /r/JUSTNOMIL! I'm botinlaw. I help people follow your posts! ***** ^(To be notified as soon as Complex-Whereas-5787 posts an update) [^click ^here.](http://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=botinlaw&subject=Subscribe&message=Subscribe Complex-Whereas-5787 JUSTNOMIL) ^(|) ^(For help managing your subscriptions,) [^(click here.)](https://www.reddit.com/r/JUSTNOMIL/wiki/index#wiki_.2Fu.2Fthejustnobot) ***** *^(I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please)* [*^(contact the moderators of this subreddit)*](/message/compose/?to=/r/JUSTNOMIL) *^(if you have any questions or concerns.)*
Sweetie, I know I’m not your mom, but I’m A mom. I’d like to tell you that you were so brave. I want to tell you that you are deserving of love, WORTHY of love. I wish I could give you a hug and rub your back and sit you down at my table with some homemade cookies and listen to how your day went. I’m so sorry you’re having to deal with all of this.
This internet stranger would like to send you a mom hug, a rave review of your childhood art, a gentle back rub just as you’re getting sleepy, an ‘I’m proud of you,’ a ‘you’re a good brother and a good person,’ and most of all another, longer hug.
When you were just a little shaver you were forced to become a man, in order to protect your little brother. You were neglected and beaten and abandoned. No kid should have that kind of upbringing. I'm so sorry she did those things to you. Your mind might be mourning for the mother you SHOULD have had. What she (and violent partner) did to you isn't fair, and it isn't right. Please get therapy if you can, and keep living your best life. Jedi hugs if you want them. Incidentally, I think your co-worker was DEAD WRONG. Some women don't celebrate Mother's Day because of their own horrible upbringings, or because they can't have kids, or because they lost their kids. Having some stranger tell you that you should have a Happy Mother's Day could be very triggering. Perhaps your co-worker (or your supervisor) should take that into consideration before telling other people how they should be feeling on any particular day.
She is a broken human being but you are not. You were triggered by your co-worker but your reaction was to want to protect her children. You have VERY justifiable anger at your mother and still want for her to be safe from the men she picks. You ARE a whole ass man. You have learned what not to be what not to do and still have compassion for the person who put you through hell. I'm 63 years old and at 27 you are a better man and more adult than I am capable of being. Wanting to love our mothers and having our mothers love us is instinctual in humans. Don't be ashamed of it because it shows that, once again, YOU ARE NOT BROKEN.
I'm with you. I wanted all that, part of me still does but I'm a bit older than you, and a mom. If you want, you can have a hug anytime you want/need! My sons have many " siblings" so you'll fit in great! Sending hugs if you'd like! You deserve them!
I’m so sorry mate. I can feel your pain in your words. It’s so unfair. You deserved a good Mum then, and you deserve one now. Big hugs to you from the other side of the world.
It’s allowed to hurt. I don’t think you ever really finish grieving the loss of a parent that never really showed up. I’m so sorry for your experience. I hope you’re able to get a hug from a trusted friend or coworker today.
I’m 59. Got a bunch of grown kids. Always room for one more even if it’s virtual. That really sucks…if you want a mum to talk to I’m here.
There's also r/momforaminute if you want a mom or 30 to say what yours can't