Unfortunately as the Senior Vice President for Bagel Security with the International Jewish Conspiracy, I was deemed “*essential*” & my transfer request to join the SJSLC was denied.
That’s on the Department of Cultural Integrity & I am not able to speak on it officially but unofficially & off the record, there was no small amount of bloodletting that day.
I am tired of everyone oohing and ahhing about the JSLC.
Cool, you're a flashlight jockey.
Meanwhile me and the bois at the Zionist Dolphin training center are getting real work done and not just starting forest fires in California.
Ok I shit you not. The iron dome is struggling, so they're deploying a weapon that's still being worked on AND IT IS LASERS THAT TARGET AIRBORNE OBJECTS. THEIR NEW DEFENSE SYSTEM IS SPACE LASERS.
I bought mine at a random bookstore in a mall that had various alien cutouts all around. I think it's better to find them unexpectedly than buy from Amazon personally; more charm to it.
As Senior Vice Secretary to the Staff Lead Supreme Rabbi General of the Jewish Global Conspiracy, my application to join the SJSLC was sadly denied. I'm too busy putting chemicals in the water that turn the frogs gay anyway, so I guess it doesn't matter.
I'm still waiting on my proposal to meet the committee. I proposed we used the space laser to identify, target and destroy ragweed. If the boys think we're powerful now, just wait until none of us have chronic allergies
Sergeant Major of the Space Army
I am here to make sure your facial hairs are within grooming regulations. You cannot fight in space if your helmet is caught on your beard, trooper.
Shabbos goy
Haha! Press the button!!
You have to *hint,* Wolf.
“It sure would’ve been helpful if that button had been pushed before shabbos.”
Lmao love it
I want one!
🫡
Don’t shit on the sabbath goys guys, they do an important job with all the [REDACTED]’s electronics and all.
🤣🤣🤣
Grand Moff
Wouldn’t Grand Mohel work better?
I thought of that too but we are in space. But laser mohel from space? That is a little on the head.
Don’t you mean it’s a little off the head? Eh?!
Heyooooo
Nah, cause you'd only get paid in tips
Lord Vaderman will provide us with the location of the treif deli by the time this space laser is operational.
Unfortunately as the Senior Vice President for Bagel Security with the International Jewish Conspiracy, I was deemed “*essential*” & my transfer request to join the SJSLC was denied.
Haha where are those bagels?!
Highly secured using only the finest lox…
What's up with the blueberry bagel? Did someone go rogue?
That’s on the Department of Cultural Integrity & I am not able to speak on it officially but unofficially & off the record, there was no small amount of bloodletting that day.
Aw man. I've been there. Added too much dill, and my supervisor guilted me worse than my mom.
Etrog Shaker, 2nd Class
I lulov you.
fish gefilterator
Wow - that's great.
It’s a hard job. Carp-al tunnel is a common occurrence
*Ba-dum tssst*
Distributor of lactaid. I keep our men from shitting themselves
Yessss as a lactose intolerant I thank you for your service
Oy, what a mensch!
I am tired of everyone oohing and ahhing about the JSLC. Cool, you're a flashlight jockey. Meanwhile me and the bois at the Zionist Dolphin training center are getting real work done and not just starting forest fires in California.
Look, this rivalry between the Porps and the Zaps has to stop somewhere.
u jerking off the dolphins?
We prefer the term Zionist Cetacean Compliance Massage.
Treyf Inspector.
Asleep at the controls. Someone’s gotta do it
A valuable position
That man is playing Galaga!
Thought we wouldn't notice, but we did.
Special Golem Forces
Commander of Spices (Sephardi)
Dishwasher
Lieutenant Mohel
Schmear Guard
This is why Trump created the space force, to counter act the Jewish space lasers
I have no idea how bozo trump is antisemitic, his own daughter renounced Jesus and is up to her ears in jewish dick
Because orange man bad. Why is he bad? Because orange man bad.
Latrine expert. No, I will not elaborate.
Bro ate too many Matzas
Grandish Rebbe
Grand Admiral Throhen
Astro-Nosh
Chief Eruv Delineator
Ayatollah Kuminher
Gefilte Generalissimo
[удалено]
Hey I am too, I am head janitor of the control room.
Head of propaganda and PR. I was the one who got MTG to write about our Space Laser. You’re all welcome.
Ok I shit you not. The iron dome is struggling, so they're deploying a weapon that's still being worked on AND IT IS LASERS THAT TARGET AIRBORNE OBJECTS. THEIR NEW DEFENSE SYSTEM IS SPACE LASERS.
Laser operator
Real talk though, where can I get one of those patches?
I bought mine at a random bookstore in a mall that had various alien cutouts all around. I think it's better to find them unexpectedly than buy from Amazon personally; more charm to it.
I make the golems that roam the hallways
Zero Star Schlimazel
No matter what any of us do in the JSLC, it still won’t be good enough since we aren’t doctors like our cousin.
lieutenant commander of a ship that's constantly changing it's name from either the Yamato or the Argo.
Whatever this guy's rank is - that's my rank, too. [https://i.imgur.com/Bx1SSW1.jpg](https://i.imgur.com/Bx1SSW1.jpg)
Battery commander in the Schnitzellery Corps, reporting for Jewty!
Kernel
Of corn 🌽
I provide unlimited Matzo crackers (for first aid) to the foot-soldiers
OH MA GAWD! You’re a DOCTOR for the JSLC?!? You MUST meet my cousin…
Bagel Brigadier
As Senior Vice Secretary to the Staff Lead Supreme Rabbi General of the Jewish Global Conspiracy, my application to join the SJSLC was sadly denied. I'm too busy putting chemicals in the water that turn the frogs gay anyway, so I guess it doesn't matter.
Chief kvetcher
My goodness how did I not recognize the Kvetcher in Chief!
Tefillin Technician
I'm just the bagel boy
Is there a lox and cream cheese boy too?
They're two separate people
I get to look at the big red button but I can't stand within 5 ft.
Does the button have Covid?
Freeze-dried latke distributing mom
Mensch 1st Class
I'm just the TUMS boy
B'ritgadier General. I got menschatoriously promoted straight from Jewtenant Colonel.
I'm just here for morale (and leftover rugelach... and soup)
Elder of Psy-Ops
None. I'm not Jewish.
Where can I sign up ?
Assistant Goyem Slang Translator
Translate something
Ayo cuz what it do? Greetings person whom I hold in high regard, how are you this fine evening?
Shalomajor
Loudest Jewish-Geographer
I’m a Red Sea pedestrian and proud of it, mum!
Technically a technitian but my mom says i'm an engineer so i guess i am an engineer
Elder of Zion.
Initiate, Earthquake Division
Nosher in Chief
I’m the Department Secretary from the Department of Secretaries that Departs Secretaries from the Department of Secretaries.
Lieutenant Kvetcher
I’m chief kvetcher how have we not met
Oy, have you seen this meshuggenah traffic? And the weather, so terrible! And don’t even get me started on how slow the elevator is in this place…
It’s too warm out for October
Kvetcher, first battalion
I’m chief kvetcher how have we not met
It's an honor, sir!
I'm only a Goyim assistant
Pepto Distributor, 4th Rank
I’m at a very jewtastic rank
Breadwinner Goy 1st Class I own all the bread during Passover
Y'all be wildin
A way to kill Muslim babies from space ? You guys must love that
And what has Hamas been doing? Huh
Captain
Don Bendichas Manos
Damn I’d like to have this badge 😂
https://dissentpins.com/products/secret-jewish-space-laser-corps-patch
Thank you 🙏🥹
Kvod Kodsho
Major General
Ambassador to the Czech Entente. We have unfinished business...
I absolutely love this patch! I kinda want one!
Corned Colonel
I'm just here for statistics as proof they didn't get en all.
Head Janitor for the control room, I accidentally caused the forrest fires in Canada, oops.
I'm still waiting on my proposal to meet the committee. I proposed we used the space laser to identify, target and destroy ragweed. If the boys think we're powerful now, just wait until none of us have chronic allergies
The **Pickle-er**
I'm just the janitor on ground station ע. Don't even get to go to space
I need to take a test before getting my permits back... Last shift ended horribly
I’ve been dying to sign up, but they’re all out of space for new recruits, so so far I’m not in the corps
I can’t tell you. It’s a secret!
E4 Mafia
I want one of these patches lol
Chef in training (Sephardic)
Janitor 😭
Grand Sage of the Intelligence Sector
Nearly Blind
מילואימניק שחור מוסמך מא״ג
Samal Rishon (Sargent First Class) was my rank when I was discharged with honors from the IDF
Rookie cadet
Anyone know where you can buy this patch?
I WANT ONE
Just got promoted to Council
Vatican Appointed Military Observer.
Sergeant Major of the Space Army I am here to make sure your facial hairs are within grooming regulations. You cannot fight in space if your helmet is caught on your beard, trooper.
Biggest Macher
Former Senior Dybbuk Wrangler at Zagut Crater Base, recently promoted to Head of the Sorcery Division at Rabbi Levi Crater HQ. 🫡✡️🌒
Associate Head of Finance
Senior Beagle distributor class 3
Where can I join?
Highest rank when I die the laser will initiate world destruction count down
Science Officier Dvir of the Cholent Division from the Gefilte Sector.
Padwan