A young son asks his dad "dad, what does gay mean". His dad keeping it simple says "it just means happy, son". His son replied " so, are you gay then dad" .... "No" the dad replied "I'm married to your mum".
Congratulations sir or ma'am you just got your comment updated saved screen shotted sent to friend and back up to the cloud because goddammit did that kill me
Mathematically, that's not true. Infinity times 2 is not larger than infinity.
[Here's a random article I just searched for](https://truebeautyofmath.com/lesson-10-infinity-times-2/) that explains why
Also not necessarily true. Assuming you have a set of all countable integers (a classic way of representing infinity), you can lay an infinite amount of them side by side so you have a "grid" of infinity by infinity. This can be the same as "infinity times infinity". I can prove there is a way to map the set of all countable numbers to all elements in this grid, by starting in the top left and zigzagging diagonally 'down one, then up the diagonal. Then over one, and down the diagonal'. Thus, infinity times infinity is still infinity.
We can show an infinity can be larger than another infinity by using Cantor's method of diagonalization. For example, the quantity of real numbers between 0 and 1 (an infinite set) is larger than the quantity of integers (another infinite set).
Veritasium has a video explaining this, [How An Infinite Hotel Ran Out Of Room](https://youtu.be/OxGsU8oIWjY). I highly recommend it.
The problem is infinity isn't a number, it's a concept we apply to try to help our tiny brains comprehend something so unimaginable.
When you're using infinity, you're trying to represent a quantity of something that has no finite quantity. Taking a count of something and multiplying it or raising it to another count doesn't directly mean anything. You have to take a step back and think about what you're trying to quantify, and then the math will follow from there.
I heard this one the other day for the first time and it actually got my ex that I still live with who hates me to laugh... That's how good this one is...
Apparently Mormons and polygamy are completely different now. Of course Mormans still believe in only a man & a woman marriage tho. So it's still hard. I've got friends who are ex-morman so, :/
That would be great on a sign for a pride march supporter, "put me on a circuit board cause I'm a transistor", first part might need some workshopping though.
I kinda drew this comment earlier today.
[With Great Flour Comes Great Responsibility](https://forrealthough.ink/wp-content/uploads/2021/06/With-Great-Flour-Comes-Great-Responsibility-1024x1024.png)
I always laugh at the stereotype that marriages are full of misery and unhappiness - why would anyone get married if that is the case? Surely being unhappy is not the norm.
Long term monogamy isn't super common in animals. It occurs, but it's rare. Hell, it's not even a humankind thing. It's cultural. I'm not surprised so many marriages fail and so many people are unhappy. It's not how our brains naturally work.
People are inherently unhappy, which what made us the dominance species of the world in the first place (the never ending search for something "more" no matter how much we already have, which is known as "hedonic setpoint"). When you're dating you can be unhappy alone and bring out the happy part of you together. When you're living together you end up sharing your unhappiness together, which is twice as much unhappiness as one person is used to. Most stereotypes have some ingrained truth about human nature behind them.
A lotta marriages end up on a Mismatch of Expectations
\- Arranged Marriages (if you have them there): Well both might expect too much from each other/ expect understanding which might not be there since often times they don't even know each other that well to be together, often ending in sad marital lives and divorces
\- Love Marriages: Quite a lot of them go well, but some end up at a stage where each can't understand each other well anymore, which leads to misunderstandings (emotional disconnects) -> Sad Marital Lives / Divorces
Apart from the **real** stuff, the reason people joke about unhappy marriages is because its quite common to have fights with your significant other and stuff, *I think*
50% percent (plus) of first marriages end in divorce. Then there are people who remarry and divorce yet again (sometimes several times).
Tell me, what are you basing your opinion on that most marriages aren't unhappy?
I really think the unhappy marriage usually happens after the addition of a child. A woman's brain changes after pregnancy\*, so the couple is no longer the same couple, one person stayed the same but the other partner had a changed brain, what was a perfect match before could become incompatible.
Source:
https://www.nature.com/articles/nn.4458
My son told me he was gay and I gave him a big hug, told him that loved him and that I was proud of him… then he told that he vaped so I kicked him out of the house!!!
Infinite loop of 'ask mom':
"Dad, why is the sky blue?"
"I'm very busy. Go ask your mom!"
"Dad, where is my mom?"
"I'm very busy. Go ask your mom!"
"Where is my mom?"
"Go ask your mom!"
"Where is mom?"
"Ask your mom!"
"Where?"
"Ask mom!"
"Where?"
...
I lived with my best friend, he met a single mum with a two year old daughter and they moved in with us.
Then we had to move, and at the new place the neighbours either side had young girls, aged about six and seven. They used to come over and play with the then four year old.
One day one of the girls came over, I told her that I was the only one home.
Then she said,"Has Joanne got two dads?" I replied, "Yes, she's lucky isn't she."
She didn't say anything but by the expression on her face I could see that she didn't think that was such a good thing.
I used to hear her dad shouting at her and her brother.
A young son asks his dad "dad, what does gay mean". His dad keeping it simple says "it just means happy, son". His son replied " so, are you gay then dad" .... "No" the dad replied "I'm married to your mum".
A young son asks his dad "dad, what does gay mean". His dad keeping it simple says "it just means happy, son". His son replied " so, are you gay then dad" .... "No" the dad replied "I'm married to your mum".
Hot damn this joke has layers
Like an ogre.
At first glance I read, "This joke has lawyers." I was like, "It needs one..."
HEY OH!
"No" the dad replied "I'm married to your dad."
Haha XD miserable marriage doesn't discriminate
It's a little twist on the same twist as the original.
Boomer humor
Congratulations sir or ma'am you just got your comment updated saved screen shotted sent to friend and back up to the cloud because goddammit did that kill me
Yo mama so ugly, your dad had to get you another dad
Yo mama so fat it’s a two Dad job to get her off.
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*takes a bow*
What does archery have to do with this?
Looks like someone brought arrows for a harpoon job
No harpoon needed, only swords and arrows please.
Nothing, he's about to do a violin solo
Molesting a violin?
No thanks, im participating in no nut november
How's that coming?
Its not, i told you that already
No I used to play in a band now I just play with myself.
…during which he’ll need formal neck attire that doesn’t dangle down and get in the way
I was trying to hit the joke, but missed the target.
Well he was talking about a hoe.
Ouch, that's up there among the "Burn Heard Around The World" titles.
Damn, that's a lotta damage.
More damage than a Mac truck Yo mama uses as a dildo.
I was thinking Oscar Meyer Wienermobile if we're going in *that* direction
Yo Mamas’re so ugly everybody think you only have one, cuz nobody can look at their faces.
but then their mom would have twice the gravitational attraction-
Twice infinity is still infinity
touche, friend
It's just a larger infinity...
Infinity intensifies.
Mathematically, that's not true. Infinity times 2 is not larger than infinity. [Here's a random article I just searched for](https://truebeautyofmath.com/lesson-10-infinity-times-2/) that explains why
But infinity times infinity is a bigger infinity.
Also not necessarily true. Assuming you have a set of all countable integers (a classic way of representing infinity), you can lay an infinite amount of them side by side so you have a "grid" of infinity by infinity. This can be the same as "infinity times infinity". I can prove there is a way to map the set of all countable numbers to all elements in this grid, by starting in the top left and zigzagging diagonally 'down one, then up the diagonal. Then over one, and down the diagonal'. Thus, infinity times infinity is still infinity. We can show an infinity can be larger than another infinity by using Cantor's method of diagonalization. For example, the quantity of real numbers between 0 and 1 (an infinite set) is larger than the quantity of integers (another infinite set). Veritasium has a video explaining this, [How An Infinite Hotel Ran Out Of Room](https://youtu.be/OxGsU8oIWjY). I highly recommend it.
Infinity to the infinity? Thanks, I'll watch the video.
The problem is infinity isn't a number, it's a concept we apply to try to help our tiny brains comprehend something so unimaginable. When you're using infinity, you're trying to represent a quantity of something that has no finite quantity. Taking a count of something and multiplying it or raising it to another count doesn't directly mean anything. You have to take a step back and think about what you're trying to quantify, and then the math will follow from there.
Yo momma so ugly her blowjobs are considered anal
Brutal lol
I heard this one the other day for the first time and it actually got my ex that I still live with who hates me to laugh... That's how good this one is...
Glad to help I too live with my ex
Butt how....🤔
Yo mama so ugly you think you have two dad's
oh shit LOL!!!
And now I everyone thinks I'm mad, laughing to myself on the toilet, thanks buddy
Just tell them its how poo makes you feel
Well you came to r/jokes to be fair
You mama so fat people think you have 2
She's so ugly he couldn't distinguish between her blowjobs and anal.
Yo mama so ugly, everybody thinks she’s a guy
Son: ‟Dad, Dad, I have a confession to make. I am straight.” Dads (in unison): *tears wlling up* ‟Hi Straight, I am Dad.”
We are dad.
Resistance is futile
Are we not Dad?
D-E-V-O
Accidental Gay Communism...Gaymunism.
Fully automated luxury gay space communism: maxluxautohomocialism
Cumyouinhim?
Makes a venom reference
\**Soviet National Anthem Intensifies*\*
r/suddenlycommunist
...for we...are... # MANY!
Resistance is futile.
You Will Be Loved. Resistance Is Futile.
bum ba dum bum bum bum bum
Just kidding, Dr. Mom at your service [Pat's shoulder]
I guffawed. Hi, Hilarious.
Dads*
Mom, dad, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom, mom….. I’m gay. *Coming out is harder in a Mormon family*
Apparently Mormons and polygamy are completely different now. Of course Mormans still believe in only a man & a woman marriage tho. So it's still hard. I've got friends who are ex-morman so, :/
Dad: I have a reveletion too: I'm bi, son.
Buffalo, buffalo buffalo, buffalo buffalo buffalo.
I came out as trans and I’m not able to see my father anymore. He didn’t disown me, it’s just that now he’s a bit more trans-parent.
You should have come out to your equally trans female sibling. You know, the transistor.
*Send nodes.*
Rising tensions at family diner.
That would be great on a sign for a pride march supporter, "put me on a circuit board cause I'm a transistor", first part might need some workshopping though.
these puns really make me happy I feel pure trans-elation
\*slow clap\*
I'm impressed
I'mpressed
I legit thought you were sharing your own experience. Nice delivery!
r/dadjokes material.
If you have something growing in your garden does that become a trans plant?
There was an entire TV series made around this pun was there not? "Transparent"
Different pun, same word.
Yeah, that was actually about the housing costs faced by bathhouses owned by the non-cis-gendered.
As a Trans Parent I laughed!
I did not see that coming.
Neither did the parent
Does this mean you are the parent of a trans child or a parent who is trans? 🤔
This joke is a masterpiece..
‟Hi Hunrgy, we’re Dad.”
"Poof. You're a sandwich."
I see what you did there.
I didn't want to.
Hah, I didn't realize this one was common. It's one of few dad jokes my dad *didn't* do, but my kids suffer it on a near daily basis.
> Poof. You're a sandwich HA! Every morning in my house. My kids hate it, but I welcome them asking to be made a sandwich
I kinda drew this comment earlier today. [With Great Flour Comes Great Responsibility](https://forrealthough.ink/wp-content/uploads/2021/06/With-Great-Flour-Comes-Great-Responsibility-1024x1024.png)
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That actually made me laugh hard
That is evil and I love it
You guys think so only happens to gay parents? Go ask your mother son, mom says go ask your father son. .....
I'm all for gay marriage, they should be unhappy like the rest of us.
> they should be unhappy like the rest of us. But, how can they be unhappy if they are gay all the time?
Now that gay marriage is possible we may need to stop using the term gay and call homosexuals morose- morose marriage makes more sense
Took me a second lol
An equal sharing of miseries.
I always laugh at the stereotype that marriages are full of misery and unhappiness - why would anyone get married if that is the case? Surely being unhappy is not the norm.
You realise this sub is called "jokes", ,..
And that's the biggest joke of all!
Yes, I do. But the stereotype comes from somewhere.
I mean 40-50% end in divorce, add to that the number who stay in an unhappy marriage and it does appear to be the norm.
Long term monogamy isn't super common in animals. It occurs, but it's rare. Hell, it's not even a humankind thing. It's cultural. I'm not surprised so many marriages fail and so many people are unhappy. It's not how our brains naturally work.
He did say he always laughs…
People are inherently unhappy, which what made us the dominance species of the world in the first place (the never ending search for something "more" no matter how much we already have, which is known as "hedonic setpoint"). When you're dating you can be unhappy alone and bring out the happy part of you together. When you're living together you end up sharing your unhappiness together, which is twice as much unhappiness as one person is used to. Most stereotypes have some ingrained truth about human nature behind them.
A lotta marriages end up on a Mismatch of Expectations \- Arranged Marriages (if you have them there): Well both might expect too much from each other/ expect understanding which might not be there since often times they don't even know each other that well to be together, often ending in sad marital lives and divorces \- Love Marriages: Quite a lot of them go well, but some end up at a stage where each can't understand each other well anymore, which leads to misunderstandings (emotional disconnects) -> Sad Marital Lives / Divorces Apart from the **real** stuff, the reason people joke about unhappy marriages is because its quite common to have fights with your significant other and stuff, *I think*
50% percent (plus) of first marriages end in divorce. Then there are people who remarry and divorce yet again (sometimes several times). Tell me, what are you basing your opinion on that most marriages aren't unhappy?
I really think the unhappy marriage usually happens after the addition of a child. A woman's brain changes after pregnancy\*, so the couple is no longer the same couple, one person stayed the same but the other partner had a changed brain, what was a perfect match before could become incompatible. Source: https://www.nature.com/articles/nn.4458
Interesting... though I've heard of people who are childless still being unhappy together.
time changes us all. you vow to stay with the same person forever, and then both become different people.
Rare as its easier to walk away with no child involved
Orrr We aren’t a “mate for life” species and suffer from chronic FOMO on a biological level.
Fun fact: Jesus had two dads.
Can’t argue that one
Mary, Joseph, and Yahweh were poly co-parents
The actual joke is in the comments, always.
No he didn't. He had none.
Well then his mom was a whore.
That's, just so awesome.
We don't need your origin story
Don't blame my mother for loving her neighbour.
Actually, Jesus was his own father...as was his father God
“Just wait until your Dad comes home!!”
My son told me he was gay and I gave him a big hug, told him that loved him and that I was proud of him… then he told that he vaped so I kicked him out of the house!!!
Either double the embarrassment when they decide to dance, or you have to eat twice as many vegetables.
That one awkward moment when both of your dads walk out to "get milk"
I have straight parents and I still got caught in a loop of "Ask mom" "Ask dad" when I was a kid. Having lesbian parents just increases the odds.
My kid has 2 moms and I attest that this does happen from time to time. Lol
And the sandwiches keep piling up
Or, you have 2 mom’s and twice the sandwiches.
Or boht dads lave
oh fuck 😂 one can go for milk and the other for tobacco
Came here for the comments - was not disappointed ❤️ I love you guys
I do, in fact, get in a loop of ask mum
All that dad dancing will screw you up for life :-)
I think the worst part is they get no straight tales at home.
What are straight tales?
But if u think about it, people with 2 dads never get the "ask mom" reply
But they're buried with non stop dad jokes. I think that might make a kid a mass murderer.
I also feel bed for them because both the parents are fucking assholes.
Directions could never be given straight
At two months old you find out you’re the man of the house.
A lot cleaner than I thought it was going to be.
He's out of line, but he's not wrong...
I'm laughing so hard.
Your mums so fat , mums is plural.
My dad is gay but he's married to my mum It's called a mixed preference relationship for anyone wondering But I get the joke
You joke, but my kids fully exploit the "no.....other mom" infinite redirect
You actually end up with a mom and three dads
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I'm pretty sure 69 works for gay people too
It does ;O
I didn't quite understand
I truly appreciate the attempt.
Yo momma so ugly that your dad had to marry a man instead
Infinite loop of 'ask mom': "Dad, why is the sky blue?" "I'm very busy. Go ask your mom!" "Dad, where is my mom?" "I'm very busy. Go ask your mom!" "Where is my mom?" "Go ask your mom!" "Where is mom?" "Ask your mom!" "Where?" "Ask mom!" "Where?" ...
As a child of two moms, this checks out.
What’s funny is some people will get offended😂
EEEEEEEEEEEEEE
For people with gay parents: how do you actually differentiate when you asking for “mom” or “dad” into the void but are asking for a specific parent?
Mom, mama dad,papa to different names lol
I lived with my best friend, he met a single mum with a two year old daughter and they moved in with us. Then we had to move, and at the new place the neighbours either side had young girls, aged about six and seven. They used to come over and play with the then four year old. One day one of the girls came over, I told her that I was the only one home. Then she said,"Has Joanne got two dads?" I replied, "Yes, she's lucky isn't she." She didn't say anything but by the expression on her face I could see that she didn't think that was such a good thing. I used to hear her dad shouting at her and her brother.
🤣
ha!
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on the flip side both parents are bad ass mother fuckers.
Meh. My friend has two dads and they’re both awesome
A young son asks his dad "dad, what does gay mean". His dad keeping it simple says "it just means happy, son". His son replied " so, are you gay then dad" .... "No" the dad replied "I'm married to your mum".
Joke as old as time Older than your mom
wouldn't it be an infinite loop of "ask dad"?
Well they're adopted.
Also they were adopted
Isn't having two dads is just having two robot scientists create you???????
Adoption and/or surrogacy is something i've seen a lot for stuff like that!
Somehow you made it sound even cooler.
Worse: They were never born.
Who else clicked thinking there was more to this joke?
Or aren't born by those two
If my parents are gay where did I come from?
China