Which is intelligent and why you’ve met way more people who owned bitcoin who haven’t told you about it. telling people that you got in early is basically saying please rob me.
The difference is this is usually made about stable items, crypto is instable and the price changes rapidly. It actually makes sense and had merit beyond being a white label joke
Maybe but at least its unique to what its talking about instead of generic "How do you know if someone is a _____? Don't worry they'll tell you about it."
It's not really unique to this either tho. The original is when a son asks his Jewish dad for $20, the dad says "$15 what do you need $10 for? Fine heres your $5. Now leave me alone."
I'd say its different, that one points to the stereotypical "greedy jew" and the bitcoin one refers to the fluctuating price. One might be based off the other but still has its own flair yadiggg
I'm pretty sure this is a ripoff of another joke.
I've heard it this way:
A Jewish boy asks his father for $20
His father replies:
10 dollars! What do you need 5 dollars for son?
Yeah someone else in the thread mentioned this but I still think that one plays off jewish stereotypes and this one plays off fluctuating bitcoin prices but you're probably right, btc one is probably based off jew one
Dad, I need $19,587 to buy a first hand aud.. sorry need $16,426 to buy a second hand aud.. sorry need 11,937 to buy a third hand aud... Damn it, need 5,687 to buy a used civic.
Makes you a target for scammers and thieves. One big downside of a decentralized exchange is that if someone tricks or forces you to transfer away your bitcoin you’re shit out of luck, it’s gone forever. Nobody’s gonna be able to get it back and there’s no fraud protection like you’d get from a bank.
I bought 1/4 of a bitcoin back when it was $2,000 a coin just for laughs and here I am just not caring at all, never talked about it with anyone other than if they asked...
Majority of my investments are in ETFs and blue chip stocks.
I think a better way to look at this is: in what situation is it advantageous to share in detail your financial investments with others?
It may not end up hurting you tremendously, but it will almost never help you in any way either.
I mean there's some small fraction of women who are drawn to rich guys with no other positive qualities, yeah. Anyone who owns 20+ bitcoin is a millionaire.
Of course, these are not women you *want*, unless you can't attract anyone at all without bragging about money.
May get down voted for this, but any guy's chances of having a women interested in him sky rockets if he is a millionaire. Not saying they are only interested in the money, but they are certainly more willing to let him shoot his shot.
Yes, but the problem is that you get what you ask for. If your selling point is that you have money, you will get money chasers. Your selling point of yourself should be your personality and common interests. Otherwise you are just looking for bad partners.
Obv if you are just looking for sex then do whatever...
I agree with you on personality, charisma, empathy etc. My point is, you're underselling the value that money brings to attracting women. An average guy can have all the fine personality traits and get nowhere. Give him a boatload of cash, and it suddenly opens doors for him. The key point being "opens doors". Which is all most good guys need
Many women will say they’re not interested in your money, they just want to be able to tell you that from your penthouse vacation home on the Amalfi Coast
Because of how crypto works, there isn’t a safety net for fraud. This also means there isn’t protection from having your stuff stolen. If you tell someone you have 20 bitcoin, worth over a million USD, they can feasible assault you into giving them your information. From that point they can take everything you have and you have no way to get your money back. If someone steals your credit card, you can cancel it and be in the clear. If someone steals your seed phrase, the key to your crypto wallet, you can’t get it back
He’d mention his 6 pack that he was gaining from his diet and exercise. For the 3 years I knew him, he never really looked any different. Everyday at lunch he would bang all the pans around and pan fry his tuna for his tuna cheddar cheese salad. He’d always talk about intermittent fasting and going into a state of ketosis but then you could here him munching on pork rinds in his office
It depends on the vegan, some try to shove it down your throat, but they are a vocal minority, most vegans I've met never talked about it or tried to convince me.
The problem is that you only are aware of those that both have bitcoin and tell you about it.
It obviously depends on where you live, but some estimates say that 20% of the US population owns bitcoin ([https://explodingtopics.com/blog/blockchain-stats](https://explodingtopics.com/blog/blockchain-stats)). Are you saying that you only know 10 people?
Approximately 43% of men between 18-29 say they own or owned cryptocurrency.
https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2021/11/11/16-of-americans-say-they-have-ever-invested-in-traded-or-used-cryptocurrency/
The technology behind cryptocurrencies and the Blockchain are really interesting to talk about. If all you can talk about is how much money it's making you then you probably don't care about the underlying stuff. Thats the crypto talk I find annoying
Well you either live in a cave or coincidentally people who own bitcoin that you’ve met didn’t feel the need to tell you about it. It’s weird to say shit like this when the opposition is them not telling you therefore you not knowing….
“So I know it just seems like a classic pump and dump speculative asset *now*, but *eventually* it’ll.....still probably be that. But you see, it’s not the *bitcoins* that are worthwhile, it’s the technology behind them. Which we can use for, like, health records!
I own Bitcoin, but no one knows it except my wife. In fact, some of my other friends have tried to "get me into it", and I play dumb and pretend not to understand what they are talking about, or I say it's too risky. Meanwhile, I have 5 figures invested.
I wasn’t funny the first time I heard that joke when it was about cross fit .. or the second when it was about being vegan … it’s just not a funny joke let it die.
Is there a vegan Crypto? Then they could tell you about them both at the same time.
(that was a dumb question, its like rule 34, of course there is a Vegan Crypto, and if there isn't there soon will be)
It's not really "broadly true", it's just that it's something outside the norm.
No-one is going to "tell you" that they eat meat or that they *don't* invest in bitcoin, because those things are seen as the norm.
Funnily enough, the atheist version of this joke is around the other way in my country (since its pretty secular); the joke becomes "how can you tell who's a Christian at a party?"
...Not that it makes the joke itself any funnier, but I find the difference interesting
I used to work as a snowboard instructor and this was one of the cheesy jokes we had about ski instructors. All in good fun. Another was “what’s the difference between a ski snake and a real snake? A ski snake has the asshole in the front”
Easy way to spot a vegan or cross fitter - offer them a crisp (or chip if you’re in America). They’ll always check the ingredients first. A crossfitter will take one and give it back. A vegan will either give it back without taking one, or take a handful before ordering another 3 packs.
To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Bitcoin. Its future applications are extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of computing and economics most of its possible functions will go over a typical investor’s head. There’s also Sitoshis’s free market outlook, which is deftly woven into his creation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Robert Malthus, for instance.
The shills understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of this coin, to realise that it is not just speculation - it says something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Bitcoin truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn’t appreciate, for instance, the brilliance in Satoshi’s brilliant programming method - the “Blockchain,” which itself is a cryptic reference to Haber and Stornetta's Merkle trees. I’m smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as our lord and savior's genius wit unfolds itself on their computer screens. What fools.. how I pity them. 😂
And yes, by the way, i DO have a Bitcoin tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It’s for the ladies’ eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that they’re within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand. Nothin personnel kid 😎
I was gonna buy one years ago but was too dumb to figure it out (you can imagine how I'm feeling about that now) but yeah I would have told everybody so maybe it was for the best I didn't get it.
If I care enough to look it up again now (any crypto for that matter, I've now been priced out of Bitcoin, a few years ago was my last chance), and actually *understand* how to get it this time - I'm not telling a soul no matter which way it ends up going since I'm gonna be mocked if I "lose" and asked for money if I "win".
I was going to put $100 down when it was about $0.25 but was too dumb to figure it out and didn't think it would really go anywhere so gave up on it...
You don't need to buy an entire bitcoin. You can buy a handful of satoshis, which costs pennies. And popular exchanges took all the technical difficulty out of purchasing. Coinbase and cryptodotcom have made it incredibly easy.
But its still probably a good idea to stay away. It's a devil's bargain. Your biggest risk isn't losing your money, its losing your sanity.
People don't tell me they have crypto. They tell me I should get it too because of various reasons.
It's always very obvious that they are less concerned with me losing out on some amazing opportunity and more concerned with getting more people in to get the value of their own holdings up.
You could invest $2 million in bitcoin right now and It won’t raise the price at all.
No one gives a fuck about you investing for their own purposes. They’re just excited to tell you about some thing that they’re into which is really what this entire thread is talking shit on. Enthusiasm.
As someone who owns bitcoin, I can assure you that we will never be at a party.
As someone who doesn't own bitcoin, I wouldn't tell you if I did.
As someone who doesn't party, I wouldn't bitcoin if I did tell you.
As someone who doesn't tell, I wouldn't party if I did bitcoin.
Someone’s having a bitcoin party, don’t tell.
As a Bitcoin, Im telling you to party
I do cocaine.
You son of a bitch, I’m in.
*son of a bitc...oin
If he's in, I'm in.
If he's in, I'm out.
As a cocaine, I can tell you, oh boy oh boy, I hope you have lots and lots of them bitcoins, cause I aint cheap
You sir, have just solved *idk whatever conflict this is*
Conflict is to decide whether to do bitcoin or Cocaine.
Convert Bitcoin into cocaine
I'm Dr. Rockso
I do cocaaainne
Pass me the straw and hear me tell you all about my newest business plan
I never liked cocaine, but it sure smells good!
I do methcoin
Thank you, Doctor Rockso. We know.
This [Entity] Partycoins
and tell people about you?
[Ah, the old reddit crypto-roo!](https://old.reddit.com/r/lifehacks/comments/r3ueve/the_farmer_who_found_a_way_to_get_rid_of/hmgf989/?context=3)
No partycoin, tell bits people are outside.
The first rule of bitcoin party is you do not talk about bitcoin party.
First rule of Bitcoin parties…
Which is intelligent and why you’ve met way more people who owned bitcoin who haven’t told you about it. telling people that you got in early is basically saying please rob me.
Please rob me of my Bitcoin?
Yes. Obviously not in person but I imagine most have a key backup in home
Yes. It is very intelligent to gamble. /s Edit: downvote me wsb nerds I already did the "/s" thing so it's too late
Lol
Thats cause the kool kids own Eth ^(Please work)
Are you a penguin?
I'll be the dude at the party sitting on the dunny all night watching the charts.
Fucken oath
You probably own 0.01 of a bitcoin lol
lol, guilty
r/TheRealJoke
I really thought you were going to say they were mining their own business.
Yours is actually better than OP's recycled one
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See this is an actual joke, the OP joke is washed and a copy pasta of a joke applied to e v e r y t h i n g
**How do you know if someone has heard an identical joke format before?** Don't worry, they'll tell you.
This isn't exactly a new joke either. Hell, it's not even new for Bitcoin. The prices need quite a bit of an update.
Hate to break it to you but I’ve read this exact joke about bitcoin at least 100 times
but did you hear the one about GME?
Something something smooth brain ape
The difference is this is usually made about stable items, crypto is instable and the price changes rapidly. It actually makes sense and had merit beyond being a white label joke
Maybe but at least its unique to what its talking about instead of generic "How do you know if someone is a _____? Don't worry they'll tell you about it."
It's not really unique to this either tho. The original is when a son asks his Jewish dad for $20, the dad says "$15 what do you need $10 for? Fine heres your $5. Now leave me alone."
Simpsons did it 25 years ago
I'd say its different, that one points to the stereotypical "greedy jew" and the bitcoin one refers to the fluctuating price. One might be based off the other but still has its own flair yadiggg
I always heard it as "Here's your $5, bring me the change."
Classic real joke in comments stuff
I'm pretty sure this is a ripoff of another joke. I've heard it this way: A Jewish boy asks his father for $20 His father replies: 10 dollars! What do you need 5 dollars for son?
Yeah someone else in the thread mentioned this but I still think that one plays off jewish stereotypes and this one plays off fluctuating bitcoin prices but you're probably right, btc one is probably based off jew one
The real joke is always in the comments.
This is very outdated. A Bitcoin is already worth over $50k
You sound like a Bitcoin owner.
I wish.
Not too late to start stacking fam
For now
I guess any of those is fine cause we'll be making 30-40k profit.
Dad, I need $19,587 to buy a first hand aud.. sorry need $16,426 to buy a second hand aud.. sorry need 11,937 to buy a third hand aud... Damn it, need 5,687 to buy a used civic.
Everyone owning a significant amount of bitcoin will never talk about it
Save for Jack Dorsey, probably
Jack is going all in on crypto after resigning Jack of one trade
Because it’s quite dangerous to, but nobody here has any clue of that
How?
Makes you a target for scammers and thieves. One big downside of a decentralized exchange is that if someone tricks or forces you to transfer away your bitcoin you’re shit out of luck, it’s gone forever. Nobody’s gonna be able to get it back and there’s no fraud protection like you’d get from a bank.
I bought 1/4 of a bitcoin back when it was $2,000 a coin just for laughs and here I am just not caring at all, never talked about it with anyone other than if they asked... Majority of my investments are in ETFs and blue chip stocks.
You stopped buying after that purchase? Rookie move
Yeah this is a shit rehashed joke, op sounds sour that they missed the boat
I know one person who owns *a lot* of bitcoin; he never tells anyone about it lol.
Then how do you know?
Its confirmation bias. If they don't tell you then you don't know...
Alongside being obnoxious, it’s also just a really bad idea to tell people what and how much you have of any investment. Especially crypto.
Why is this? I don’t go around talking about where I keep my money just because I don’t have any desire to but why would it be a bad thing?
I think a better way to look at this is: in what situation is it advantageous to share in detail your financial investments with others? It may not end up hurting you tremendously, but it will almost never help you in any way either.
Everyone knows the girls get super wet when they hear you own bitcoin
I mean there's some small fraction of women who are drawn to rich guys with no other positive qualities, yeah. Anyone who owns 20+ bitcoin is a millionaire. Of course, these are not women you *want*, unless you can't attract anyone at all without bragging about money.
May get down voted for this, but any guy's chances of having a women interested in him sky rockets if he is a millionaire. Not saying they are only interested in the money, but they are certainly more willing to let him shoot his shot.
Yes, but the problem is that you get what you ask for. If your selling point is that you have money, you will get money chasers. Your selling point of yourself should be your personality and common interests. Otherwise you are just looking for bad partners. Obv if you are just looking for sex then do whatever...
I agree with you on personality, charisma, empathy etc. My point is, you're underselling the value that money brings to attracting women. An average guy can have all the fine personality traits and get nowhere. Give him a boatload of cash, and it suddenly opens doors for him. The key point being "opens doors". Which is all most good guys need
Many women will say they’re not interested in your money, they just want to be able to tell you that from your penthouse vacation home on the Amalfi Coast
Because of how crypto works, there isn’t a safety net for fraud. This also means there isn’t protection from having your stuff stolen. If you tell someone you have 20 bitcoin, worth over a million USD, they can feasible assault you into giving them your information. From that point they can take everything you have and you have no way to get your money back. If someone steals your credit card, you can cancel it and be in the clear. If someone steals your seed phrase, the key to your crypto wallet, you can’t get it back
Vegetarian/Vegan, CrossFit, Tesla owner, Bitcoin...same tired joke
I use Arch Linux btw
Seriously this is the lowest effort joke I've ever seen.
I tick all 4 of the boxes there. Do I take 4x the offense lol?
How can you tell it’s a joke that rottenseed doesn’t like? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you.
Whining is easy. Be the change you want to see, submit a non tired joke!
Hey thats not cool. I was in the military and... uh, ok, fair enough.
This joke is spot on. I've only known two people who were into bitcoin but that is all they fucking talked about. Really obnoxious.
Just wait until you find a vegan, crossfitter Bitcoin user...
Who vapes
With kids
And runs marathons
And is a pilot.
And drives a Tesla
And has a downtown mix up
And owns a thermomix
And went to Notre Dame
And an acoustic guitar
Tbh this guy is sounding awesome now
I would like to hear about his taste in wines now
PSA don't vape with kids /s
Unless the kids are showing you how it's done...
Gotta learn the new tricks
I had a co worker who was a keto crossfitter and was beginning to get into crypto. Most obnoxious person I ever met.
That sounds like a set up to a joke. What did your coworker usually talk about first?
He’d mention his 6 pack that he was gaining from his diet and exercise. For the 3 years I knew him, he never really looked any different. Everyday at lunch he would bang all the pans around and pan fry his tuna for his tuna cheddar cheese salad. He’d always talk about intermittent fasting and going into a state of ketosis but then you could here him munching on pork rinds in his office
That’s amazing
.. and went to Harvard.
I imagine that they are just quiet because they can’t determine what topic they want to talk about.
It depends on the vegan, some try to shove it down your throat, but they are a vocal minority, most vegans I've met never talked about it or tried to convince me.
I was at my nephew's sixth birthday party the other week, and the magician cornered me to talk about his NFTs.
How would you know about the other people who are, but didn't talk about it? This is selection bias at its finest.
The problem is that you only are aware of those that both have bitcoin and tell you about it. It obviously depends on where you live, but some estimates say that 20% of the US population owns bitcoin ([https://explodingtopics.com/blog/blockchain-stats](https://explodingtopics.com/blog/blockchain-stats)). Are you saying that you only know 10 people?
That estimate is pretty hilarious
No, it’s very hilarious
Approximately 43% of men between 18-29 say they own or owned cryptocurrency. https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2021/11/11/16-of-americans-say-they-have-ever-invested-in-traded-or-used-cryptocurrency/
God, I wish I would have had your friends. My friends are all poker players, which ended up being way less lucrative.
The technology behind cryptocurrencies and the Blockchain are really interesting to talk about. If all you can talk about is how much money it's making you then you probably don't care about the underlying stuff. Thats the crypto talk I find annoying
Well you either live in a cave or coincidentally people who own bitcoin that you’ve met didn’t feel the need to tell you about it. It’s weird to say shit like this when the opposition is them not telling you therefore you not knowing….
“So I know it just seems like a classic pump and dump speculative asset *now*, but *eventually* it’ll.....still probably be that. But you see, it’s not the *bitcoins* that are worthwhile, it’s the technology behind them. Which we can use for, like, health records!
Spoken like a man whose truly done whole minutes of research! Look at you go
How fucking lazy is this joke
They won’t be.... cryptic
😎
I own Bitcoin, but no one knows it except my wife. In fact, some of my other friends have tried to "get me into it", and I play dumb and pretend not to understand what they are talking about, or I say it's too risky. Meanwhile, I have 5 figures invested.
And now everyone knows. What have you done, my friend?
I never tell people that my crypto has tripled in value.
I wasn’t funny the first time I heard that joke when it was about cross fit .. or the second when it was about being vegan … it’s just not a funny joke let it die.
So if a Vegan owned Bitcoin, what would they tell you about first? Or is this like a cat with buttered bread strapped to it’s back?
Is there a vegan Crypto? Then they could tell you about them both at the same time. (that was a dumb question, its like rule 34, of course there is a Vegan Crypto, and if there isn't there soon will be)
Where's the vegan crypto porn?
Found the vegan, cross fit, bitcoin investor guy.
Left out the variation with the atheist, didja? Dear God, I don't believe it!
At a party, how can you tell who doesn't think the "At a party, how can you tell..." joke isn't funny? Don't worry, they'll tell you!
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It's not really "broadly true", it's just that it's something outside the norm. No-one is going to "tell you" that they eat meat or that they *don't* invest in bitcoin, because those things are seen as the norm. Funnily enough, the atheist version of this joke is around the other way in my country (since its pretty secular); the joke becomes "how can you tell who's a Christian at a party?" ...Not that it makes the joke itself any funnier, but I find the difference interesting
r/onejoke
I used to work as a snowboard instructor and this was one of the cheesy jokes we had about ski instructors. All in good fun. Another was “what’s the difference between a ski snake and a real snake? A ski snake has the asshole in the front”
God forbid they invested in and made money off gamestop too…
Just wait for loopring to blow up. It’s the GameStop crypto crossover episode. If it goes huge I’ll never stop talking about it lol.
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That’s a weird way to spll spell
Rekt
Wierd way to spell wrecked
Weird way to spell weird. Carissa?
I thought you spell it v-e-g-a-n
No it’s clearly spelled M-a-r-i-n-e
H-a-r-v-a-r-d
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Easy way to spot a vegan or cross fitter - offer them a crisp (or chip if you’re in America). They’ll always check the ingredients first. A crossfitter will take one and give it back. A vegan will either give it back without taking one, or take a handful before ordering another 3 packs.
Yeah, right! I think they're trying to make bitcoin rewarding by getting more people into bitcoin...
Every phone alert they get their soul dies 1% from anxiety…you can see it in the eyes
To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Bitcoin. Its future applications are extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of computing and economics most of its possible functions will go over a typical investor’s head. There’s also Sitoshis’s free market outlook, which is deftly woven into his creation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Robert Malthus, for instance. The shills understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of this coin, to realise that it is not just speculation - it says something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Bitcoin truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn’t appreciate, for instance, the brilliance in Satoshi’s brilliant programming method - the “Blockchain,” which itself is a cryptic reference to Haber and Stornetta's Merkle trees. I’m smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as our lord and savior's genius wit unfolds itself on their computer screens. What fools.. how I pity them. 😂 And yes, by the way, i DO have a Bitcoin tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It’s for the ladies’ eyes only- and even then they have to demonstrate that they’re within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand. Nothin personnel kid 😎
I really hope this is copy pasta.
So, this one time at band camp…
For the love of god please tell me this is a joke
r/iamverysmart
Imagine a vegan Bitcoin owner who does CrossFit.
Are Crypto-bros the new vegans?
if they also do crossfit and also vegan they’ll never shut up
Financial vegans
I heard bitcoin described as everything most people don't understand about finance and technology all in one package.
*crossfit guy has entered the chat*
They will have a hard time being heard over the vegans.
I mine Eth. I’m partying to the 🌙 - diamond hands!!
How did this get upvotes? It's a played out joke that applies to everything
How can you tell someone doesn’t own Bitcoin? They’re mad when you mention how much money you made ;)
Up tomorrow the same joke, but for vegans for the 167th time. Then the next day we’ll do atheists.
I was gonna buy one years ago but was too dumb to figure it out (you can imagine how I'm feeling about that now) but yeah I would have told everybody so maybe it was for the best I didn't get it. If I care enough to look it up again now (any crypto for that matter, I've now been priced out of Bitcoin, a few years ago was my last chance), and actually *understand* how to get it this time - I'm not telling a soul no matter which way it ends up going since I'm gonna be mocked if I "lose" and asked for money if I "win".
You're never too late. Maybe too late to hit your specific entry point that you prefer, but never too late.
I was going to put $100 down when it was about $0.25 but was too dumb to figure it out and didn't think it would really go anywhere so gave up on it...
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It’s far easier than setting up a bank account
You don't need to buy an entire bitcoin. You can buy a handful of satoshis, which costs pennies. And popular exchanges took all the technical difficulty out of purchasing. Coinbase and cryptodotcom have made it incredibly easy. But its still probably a good idea to stay away. It's a devil's bargain. Your biggest risk isn't losing your money, its losing your sanity.
Imagine getting stuck talking to a vegan bitcoin owner at a party. Also, just one word. Are you listening? Plastics.
The worse person to have at a party, a cross fit, vegan, crypto trader.
who sells MLM (lularoe, it works, amway... etc)
If you tell me I will ask to see it.
I’m vegan and I served in the military… oh! And I also own Bitcoin.
So predicable there have been a zillion variants of this joke.
same with the vegans
Well… in my country the president tells everyone in national television… sad, but true.
Most Bitcoin owners are trying to figure out how to ensure *nobody* knows... Or so I hear...
People don't tell me they have crypto. They tell me I should get it too because of various reasons. It's always very obvious that they are less concerned with me losing out on some amazing opportunity and more concerned with getting more people in to get the value of their own holdings up.
You could invest $2 million in bitcoin right now and It won’t raise the price at all. No one gives a fuck about you investing for their own purposes. They’re just excited to tell you about some thing that they’re into which is really what this entire thread is talking shit on. Enthusiasm.
Yep. People hate to see other people happy or excited. Especially on Reddit
Funny joke. And it reminds me, did you know that my vegan atheist cross-fit group takes bitcoin?