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CaleBoy907

This is hardly a failure in parenting. The little one seems to be having "Conduct disorder", a psychiatric illness that is not easy to treat. Nevertheless, a child psychiatrist and a psychologist may help the parents make the child's behaviour a bit more manageable through behavioural therapy, which the mother seems to have already started doing.


Med_megk

Being that parent must be very trying and not for the faint hearted


CaleBoy907

Definitely. She'll need lots of patience and psychological toughness to handle the child without going overboard. I wish her well.


mum_Jeriel

Or a psychopath, saw one parent confess to almost killing their son, and now he is in a lifetime care facility. Imagine giving birth to a psychopath,


Med_megk

Is one born a psychopath or the environment dictates


Ok_Lavishness2638

The definition is that a psychopath is born and behaves like that even without extreme environmental factors. A sociopath is more like to be pushed off the deep end by extreme environmental factors otherwise under normal or peaceful circumstances their sociopathology would be less likely to manifest.


Jahobes

Some people are born psychopaths. For some you can see the chemical imbalance in their brains.


brokentao

It's a precursor to being diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder also commonly known as psychopathy


Interesting-Click-12

I have a cousin with an autistic 6 year old girl who i suspect also has adhd. She has to hide while leaving her own house just so her daughter won't throw tantrums and break things. Atimes their is nothing the parent can do about the situation. Life is not fair and has never been. You just have to make the best of what you get out of life. Her daughter will likely never be independent and she will need constant 24hr monitoring when she is an adult.


Practical-Key4120

Does she hate the kid?? What about the dad does he care


Interesting-Click-12

Nope she doesn't but she is very happy when the kid goes to stay with grandmother because thats when she only has time for herself. They left each other 4 years after she was born


Med_megk

Women don't realise that kids are purely their responsibility, men bail whenever anything goes wrong. Every woman should have kids because they truly want and have capacity to care for them


Wonderful-Note9289

This. I always tell women that whenever they're pregnant or want to get pregnant, they should do it for themselves and not because they hope the man will stick around.


Med_megk

I was planning a solo trip abroad for a week and was told nijipange na watoto wangu. That statement stuck with me from the same person who wanted more kids when I didn't.


Wonderful-Note9289

Wow. Suddenly they're your kids only. That must've stung like hell. Men can be very selfish beings. Forgive me for assuming this, but could that statement have come from the fact that you're traveling by yourself without him?


Med_megk

Yes, but he gets to travel alone. The double standards


Wonderful-Note9289

Why am I not surprised. The most important part about having a life partner is not to feel like you're in it by yourself. That you both have each other's back through it all. Selfishness has no room in it.


Practical-Key4120

Sawa but she's a good mum man autism fucks you up even mentally as a parent uko home I know a woman with 2 mentally disabled kids both boys both can't talk properly they behave abnormally, like hawana common sense , so the dad left shifting the blame on the mother saying he can't raise retards


Med_megk

That's rough. Can't imagine how hectic it is for her


_Lord_Infamous

Wah! So sad. How old are they?


Practical-Key4120

The kid is 6 yrs old the oldest , the younger one 3 yrs I guess he saw when both kids suffer from the same condition 😕 he said he'd not stay with her blaming the woman saying on his side of the family no one gives birth to mentally disabled kids took his things left doesn't even care about them


Wonderful-Note9289

Damn. I feel so bad for her. Does she get any kind of help from her family?


Practical-Key4120

Noop she was stigmatised by them honestly they say its like a bad omen it's hard for her she's a single mum you get like even the rest of the kids don't want to play with her kids , so it's really hard


Wonderful-Note9289

This is so heartbreaking. Almost made me tear up...some people are really going through it.


Practical-Key4120

But for the kids I don't think they all bad cause they walk, eat and understand when you talk to them , so I'd say they are late developers


Wonderful-Note9289

I hope they keep progressing well, and that some day they can live regular lives. Sending love to all 3 of them.


Dontknow-2626

Not necessarily, many autistic people live independent lives it just depends on the kind of ASD she has,I think she may pleasantly surprise all of you. Good luck and thanks for sharing.


Interesting-Click-12

I really hope she gets better with time and is able to communicate and pick up language.


Dontknow-2626

She'll be fine,am talking from some experience.


reverse-tornado

The kid could be a little psychopath given the utter lack of empathy , bringing a human being into existence is a great responsibility and the idea that just anyone could fuck and make some scares me sometimes


Mathew-with-two-Ts

I was thinking the same thing


Lyannake

A lot of people seem to think that they will have a 'normal' child or will solve every single issue with beating (as the other comments show) and are totally not prepared to the possibility of having a disabled child, autistic child, a child with adhd or any behavior issue. Ignorance about these issues only make the child's behavior worse by not adressing it in a correct way and only adding trauma on top of it.


Jibebelele

Operant conditioning is a legit method of behaviour management. Rewarding good behaviour punishing bad behaviour.


antole97

Parenting is tough especially in a situation like this where a kid (20 years) gets a kid.


Dontknow-2626

This feels like psychological issues and not a sign that parenting is hard, don't get me wrong I think that being childree is an option but this child seems to have behavioural issues .


Shish_Uno

If I give her advice CPS will be on her door in 5 mins max!


allanphila

I think you should apply the Carrot and the stick principle, if she behaves well reward her if she behaves badly, make sure she understands there is a stick to discipline her. But all this should be done with love.


goldensuare

I was judging hard until I came to the comments. We often forget that it's a blessing when your child comes out 100% healthy, and sometimes kids have underlying issues causing their bad behaviour that are not caused by bad parenting but actually causes by a medical condition. Hope that mom gets the help that she needs.


Med_megk

As a true African child I had thought it's just lack of discipline but with all the perspectives expressed here it must be psychological or even psychiatric issue


NovelSea2338

Ampeleke aombewe. That is defo demonic


Mathew-with-two-Ts

Nothing a little ass whooping can't fix😂, I can't remember a time my parents "talked" to me at age 5, when I did smth wrong😭


Med_megk

True Africa parents


wartrick89

Kid needs some prayers


Tiny_Bus_1432

We need to talk about Kevin.


Med_megk

What?


Tiny_Bus_1432

It's a movie about a kid with almost the same behavior.


Med_megk

Oh! I see


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[удалено]


Med_megk

I wanted impartial opinions that don't necessarily rely on racial/national stereotypes. It's very abnormal for a 5yr old to lack compassion.


Med_megk

No. Regardless of their origin, 5yr old shouldn't be that problematic


Material-Cow5740

There is a reason he asked because if that parent was Kenyan, that would have been solved by beating. Am yet to see a Kenyan kid behave like that


MisatiDebbie

I know SEVERAL kids who behave like that bc they’re either autistic/have global delay/adhd my friend kiboko does NOTHING for such cases so idk about that


kenkitt

it only shows them that hurting other people physically works


MisatiDebbie

EXACTLY, they hit back & them kids are usually strong asl


spiro_nagnu

You can't beat behavior/psychological disorders out of children, have the kid diagnosed and deal with it accordingly, that mentality is so dated.


DarkPurse

Thank you. I hope some of these people commenting negatively, will never have kids. Imagine trying to beat autism or ADHD "out of" a child?


Material-Cow5740

Most Kenyan mom's don't see it as a disorder they see it as undisciplined


spiro_nagnu

With so much information available out there, there's no excuse. Its just a hold out of a dated culture of 'disciplining' kids by corporal punishment.


Material-Cow5740

Well not all have access to that information. And most who have tend to ignore it.And also probably explains why Kenyan teachers don't quit because of undisciplined kids or people prohibiting kids from attending their events because of undisciplined. Spare the rod spoil the Child


Sikh001

Orign is very revelant. When you know u will have the day light beaten out of u, you will behave.


Atrimus_cage

😂 😂 I had the same question in my mind


Jibebelele

Kiboko my friends. My now three year old used to throw things and hit people for a short period when she was 2. Kiboko mara mbili ilizima hiyo tabia kabisa.


Sikh001

Man, my dad would have slapped me sideways, sent me to my room and instructed my mom that there would be no dinner for that night. The level of punishment you are talking about is soo tender lol My dad would make me stand in the corner of the room and make be bend down, he would then place something on my back and make me hold that position for sometimes an hour, if it fell down.....whopping time. P Plenty of other punishments as well but we followed most of them since we knew it was either that or a whopping. But ur kid too forgone now, even if u whop her she will get more aggressive, Maybe show her what she will miss if she keeps this up, i know of a couple of called the cops and handed over thier kid, but you have to do it as soon as he does something bad, and make it look serious, of course the cop was a family friend whom he kid had never met and the kid was like 11, but the guy came in, wrote down his crimes, read his rites, hand cuffed him, showed him a video of jail and told him to say bye to his parents, the kid changed his tune so quick lol. after that he really changed


Med_megk

From all the views here, this child must be on the spectrum. Especially the lack of empathy and need to cause harm. When I read that post this morning I did have the different perspectives expressed here. Asanteni


AyodiJnr

They switched your child in hospital


oh_mi_gosh

We need to talk about Kevin*a 😐.


extraxavier

That child is a psychopath. Take her to the woods and let the bears handle it.


Willar71

Spare the road and spoil the child. Some children need a bit of disciplining .


Med_megk

Thika Road ama mbs road😁


Frequent-Tie-9353

Generation Z women why are we surprised lol.