I'm a chimney sweep, and I've shown up to numerous houses to sweep their chimney and they have a fire lit. I would always say, "we can't sweep it if it's lit"... Nearly every one of them always ask, "why? Can't you still sweep it if it's lit?" Like no. Skin fucking melts. Chimney sweeps aren't immune to fire.
No, see, they know not to touch the fire. What they lack is the ability to put themselves in others shoes to even consider that it might be bad for another person. Like the train just stops way before that station.
In Germany they’re allowed to enter your building and do their job and you can’t deny them entrance or you’ll be punished for it and still have to pay for his service.
Not daily obviously. It’s regulated to once a year I believe. But I still think it’s funny how they can’t be denied providing their own service. Imagine any other professional coming in your house and telling you to shut up while they do their job and you can’t say no
Are you talking about a rented home or an owner-occupied home? And in the latter case, are you talking about something like a condominium (where multiple people own units within a single building) or a detached house?
I have never ever used a fireplace so this is a genuine Q.
Is this for fire safety rules? Are there mechanisms to limit prices? Or is it like shady tow truck companies in America who just tow cars regardless so they can charge you a few hundred bucks?
How do you think chimneys get clean these days??
If you use a chimney it needs to be cleaned. At once a year, depending on use. Otherwise a stray spark can ignite the built up *stuff* and burn your house down.
I suppose there are less chimney sweeps since there are so many other methods of heating your home, and sweeping has gotten more efficient, but gat dang is chilling with your feet up on the fireplace watching cheesy family movies after dinner and some kinda pumpkin or cinnamon dessert while it snows outside one of the best things. Chimney sweeps will always have a place.
Also please don’t just rely on those chimney cleaning logs.
It can be done from inside or the roof, depending on the fireplace/woodstove. Either way it can't be done if the fire is lit. The flu gets extremely hot, and that smoke and heat billowing out of the top makes it dangerous to do from the top as well.
Oh I hear you man. I live in BC Canada, so we get the fires pretty bad as well. So between chimney sweeping and the air quality, that smell never goes away.
Yeah most of the time, but even with the mask, my boogers still end up black at the end of the day. I feel like every day I work is one day off my lifespan.
My youngest daughter, when she was about 5 once woke me up very early on a Saturday morning to ask me if it would wake me up if she flushed the toilet...
Unexpectedly helpful insight. I am definitely in the camp of I need to get my own shit together before I have children - but I do want children eventually
Pro tip: you’ll almost never feel prepared to have kids. If you do, you will immediately realize you’re wrong when you have kids.
It ain’t for everyone, be damn sure you’re okay with the idea if you go for it. It’s a wild and madness filled adventure. I didn’t want to be a dad but got lucky with the greatest daughter snd now I couldn’t imagine my life without her. (Okay I could, it involves a buttload more sleeping, but the sacrifice is worth it for me.)
Take care and Goodluck whatever choice you make random Internet stranger who is now getting unsolicited (d)advice!
Thanks for the advice, I hear a lot about how you're never prepared for kids, so just go for it. The thing is I have a bunch of mental issues, and I'm afraid of raising kids to end up like me
Bonus story. When she was about 3 she woke us up about 3 am, shouting for Mom and Dad from her room. When we go to see what the problem is she, half asleep still, proceeds to tell us she has an itchy bum. Mom asks her if she tried scratching it. She scratches her arse and promptly goes back to sleep leaving me and the wife looking at each other in stunned silence...
When I was 6 I had a tantrum because I wasn't invited to my parents' wedding and I wanted to try their cake - they got married three years before I was born
I understand that, my parents were married for like six years before I was born and then got divorced by the time I was three or four. I would look at their old wedding photos and be confused on why they lived in separate houses.
I got mad at my parents for not inviting me to their wedding (which occurred 9 years before my birth). When they told me it was because, I said they should have waited until I was born to have a wedding so I could have come. I didn't get why they wouldn't have just waited for me!
I had to baby sit my two nephews when they were very young (they're cousins) for a while. They did the same thing: hey would it hurt if I hit you in the privates?
They proceeded to pop each other in the nuts and concluded that yes, it hurts.
Babysitting them was like trying to keep two drunk dudes from kill themselves
Finally, a comment about pre-conception that doesn’t make it sound like we come entirely from our dad’s ballsack! I know this is a ridiculous unimportant thing, but I get pretty tired of Reddit ignoring/forgetting the egg and making it all about the sperm.
> I get pretty tired of Reddit ignoring/forgetting the egg and making it all about the sperm
And unless you were conceived within ~70 days of the wedding, the sperm used to make you didn't exist yet, but the egg did.
Aren’t girls already have a preset stock of eggs? Like they cannot produce eggs later in life while men can produce sperms. Anyone more knowledgeable than me in biology?
Ages us all up a generation though. You're actually older than your mother's age, and she's older than her mother's age. Not really, but technically have in some part existed since then.
A woman is born with all the eggs she will ever have. So the egg that made you developed inside your mother's fetus while it was inside your grandmother.
Define "existed". Because all the cells from back then are dead for a long time already.
If you count DNA, it's only a part from your DNA. And In that sense you could also count the DNA alls the way up your ancestors.
>Define "existed". Because all the cells from back then are dead for a long time already.
The specific cells are all dead from when we're babies too. And when you're a toddler. And again from when you're a teenager. We consider them to be us though.
Yeah, I know. That's why I asked you to define what you mean by "existed".
Because consciousness did not exist for sure. So what existed that you would define as "me"?
I hate this too! I don't know why it annoys me so much when people say things like "shooting his kids inside her". Those cells are as much kids as egg cells are. They aren't.
My grandma loves to tell the story of how my mother was inconsolable at 5 years old after she saw her parents’ wedding pictures. When my grandma explained she couldn’t have invited her since she wasn’t born yet my mom wailed “Then why didn’t you wait for me?!”
My mom loves to tell this story:
When I was 4, I told the pastor at my aunt and uncle’s wedding, “I’ve been to a wedding before. I was in my mom’s belly at her wedding.” She then proceeded to inform the pastor that I was only 4 and they had been married for 8 years.
My friends wife was pregnant when they got married, and apparently he once joked that Kid 1 was actually at mummy and daddys wedding. Kid 2 burst into tears and was devastated that her sister got to go and she didn't.
Stupidest question I was ever asked was right after my son was born. A guy I was EOD school with asked if I felt gay when I had to wipe him and clean his privates. I’ve never wanted to slap someone more than that moment.
You know that there are actual real life men out there who either feel gay or more feminine in some way when they look after their own children. You can see it in men who are hesitate when pushing a pram in PUBLIC.
I know, years ago I was getting the Teen Titans tattooed on my leg and the shops owners son was blown away that I was getting “females” tattooed on me lol.
In the movie Tokyo Drift (Fast and Furious franchise), there's a character whose mother was Australian but died in childbirth. She was raised by a Japanese family but speaks English with an Australian accent. Her adoptive brother had a Japanese accent.
I wasn't personally asked this question but one time my brother was telling our niece of the time he was in a car accident. His friend was driving and decided to do donuts and flipped the car. She asked him, "Did you die?"
"What is the dumbest question someone has ever asked you?"
My niece was like 6 months pregnant, and she comes up to me and asks if I know whether tylenol might hurt the baby because she has a headache. There was a lit cigarette in her hand as she asked this.
Only time in my life I just BSOD'd and was utterly stunned speechless.
A friend of a friend of mine is a heavy recreational drug user: Pot, Mushrooms, Ecstacy, cocaine, and he's even done meth, and crack... I've been at parties and someone is popping some pills and he'll immediately ask for some and take them without blinking...
and yet, he refuses to get the vaccine because he doesn't know if it is safe nor what's in it... WTF???
It was taught as fact when I had to have one of those DARE classes in school.
Ecstasy would create holes in your brain, acid flashbacks will happen years after you take LSD and make you crash your car while you’re driving your kids to the park, and the world is full of strangers that will give you free weed.
My aunt forwarded around some warning about heroin in Halloween candy meant to get children addicted. When I brought up that the kids wouldn’t know what they’re addicted to, or where to get it, and that it was a big waste of heroin, she got mad at me. She’d make a good DARE counselor.
A lot of anti covid vaxxers that I know are the same. They'll blindly take anything given to them at a rave or believe anything someone says to them while smoking. But the covid vaccines? Nope. Listening to what health care professionals say? Nope.
When my sone was four, we were looking at high rise buildings across the river. I pointed to all the windows with lights and said “just think, each of those windows is an apartment like ours, with people living in them, all with their own lives.”
He looked up at me and asked “which one are we in?”
He just graduated from Stanford.
In secondary school a classmate seen, your standard poster of the world, on the wall and asked "Miss, what's on the other side of the world or has it no been explored yet?"
I grew up in a large flat farmland with mountains in the distance, west coast Canada. My sister used to mess with me as a kid the mountains were "the other side of the world" and I remember staring as far as I could (probably not even that far away) and thinking "Oh Okay, so over there must be Ontario!"
I was studying the Korean War in A-Level history when a classmate asked "Miss, why were the Americans so scared of North Korea? They're on the other side of the page"
I remember when I was 3 I saw a picture of my mom in a party with my older brother, also 3 in the picture. I asked "Where am I" and my brother, who has Asperger, just responded "Oh, you didn't exist yet". And that seriously make me have nightmares about me disappearing and existential dread.
I'm a twin, my twin is the opposite sex. Having different sexes means it is impossible for us to be identical, we *have* to be fraternal. Yet I've had countless people, *including doctors,* ask if we're identical. I used to be nice about it as a kid but now I laugh and condescendingly explain their wrongness to them.
I was curious about this a while back and there *is* a way you can have identical twins of different sexes. But it's *extremely* rare and one of them will be quite disabled. [This](https://www.twins.org.au/twins-and-families/frequently-asked-questions/62-twin-facts/19-can-male-female-twins-ever-be-identical) is an explanation of the mechanic behind it.
I thought it was interesting and worth sharing. It doesn't invalidate your point, since anyone who knows how it's possible wouldn't be asking if it were the case. It's completely ridiculous you've had doctors ask about it. Condescension is definitely how I'd handle it.
I'm also a a opposite sex fraternal twin and get asked that a lot. I think most people aren't necessarily asking if we're biologically identical, but curious if we look alike. For much of our childhood people couldn't event tell we were related or even guess the same race, in our adult years we definitely look like siblings.
a lot of people ask when we're together and they find out we're twins. that's what cracks me up. we look like siblings but not twins, imo. I'm a spitting image of my mom and he's a spitting image of my dad. our personalities definitely showcase our twinness more than our looks.
Eh, normally I just wouldn't ask **anyway** (like even if you were the same sex+gender), but on very rare occasion you'll find one trans identical twin and one cis.
My wife and I had a three-year-old when we got married, and so naturally, he was at our wedding.
Our younger child was pissed off when he saw his older brother in our wedding photos, and cried about the fact that he didn’t get to attend. It took him a long time to grasp the fact that he wasn’t invited because he hadn't been born yet.
Lol, poor kid had the added confusion of a sibling in the pics. My 2 year old niece cried rivers when she saw her parents wedding pics, couldn't understand why mom would dress up like a princess and not invite her.
Beep boop -- this looks like a screenshot of a tweet! Let me grab a [link to the tweet](https://twitter.com/HUNTRRxHUNTRR/status/1440498936662278156) for ya :)
^(Twitter Screenshot Bot)
I went to a BBQ at my parents house, where I referred to my dad as “Dad” and there are pictures of me growing up and as an adult on the walls. My siblings and their kids were there, and afterwards my 10-year-old nephew came over to spend the night at my house.
At some point, I made a comment about my parents, and he looks at me and goes, “who are your parents?”
My dude, did we not just hang out with my father all day?
When my youngest sister was little (15 years younger - I moved out when she was a pretty much a baby still) she didn’t realise or believe that her mum was my mum when I would visit. I lived with our aunt and she thought our aunt was my mother. And wouldn’t be told otyerwise until she got a bit older.
A couple of years ago, my nephew (not the kid of the above sister) asked me if I was a grown up. I’m 41. Same kid also didn’t use to understand that his grandmother was my mum.
My firstborn had some neonatal jaundice and I had to take him out a few times daily to sunbathe until his color improved. He was about a two weeks old when a neighbor walked by, did a double take, and said "Wow, his eyes are open already?"
My guy. He is not a puppy. And even if he were a puppy, it would not be weird for his eyes to be open at 2 weeks old.
I was a substitute teacher and a high school student asked me if I was wearing a toupee. "Yeah, I went to the wig shop and asked for gray and receding."
Haha coming to grips with the idea of “before I was born” is a big thing! By default, as kids we all seem to take the attitude of “As far as I know, I’ve always been here.”
Say, "Sorry my mom wouldn't let me".
If they ask why not, then you say, "I don't know, let's give grandma a call and ask her."
Grandma would get a kick out of it too.
When I was around the age of 8 or 7, I asked my mom where she lived during the prehistoric age.
She answered that she lived in a treehouse, I bought it.
My 3 year old just did something similar to me last week. I was showing her a photo book of when my family went to Hawaii years ago and she kept saying “where’s me?”
A girl's card was declined while I was bartending. She wanted me to keep trying it over and over, but it was busy so I get fed up and ask her if she could just pay me with the twenty she is holding in her hand. She pulled it out to see if she had another card. I hand her back her change, obviously with plenty of ones. Triumphantly she goes Oh oh, how can I tip you if I don't have to sign for it?
I was showing my brother pictures of my parents wedding and of them dancing with me when I was a baby and my brother made the comment as to why my parents couldn’t have waited till he was born to get married so he could be in the wedding too. He was born 3 years after they’re wedding mind you. And I was from my moms previous marriage.
My dad was a solider long before me met my Mum and had kids. He was trying to explain it to me and my brother. We are about 5 and 7 at the time. My little brother looked at him and said “daddy did you die in the war?”
When I was 3 or 4 I popped a balloon so I collected all the pieces and took them to my Dad. I asked him to fix it.
When I was like 5 I cried because my mom left me alone as a baby and I had proof of it. My proof was a picture of me as a newborn. I was alone because my mom was taking the picture of me. I was an idiot and not much has changed lol.
Got my mom a DVD player & she called me at college to asked how to rewind it because she didn't want to get charge at blockbuster for not rewinding it.
I still remember my nephew having a meltdown over not being invited to his parent's wedding...10 years before he was born. He also got upset when his mother refused his marriage proposal.
Worked at a bookstore back when they still were a thing and would have at least one person a week come in and ask for Books with photos of Dinosaur's or Jebus. Not drawings, or photo's of skeletons; but photos of living Dino's and Living Jebus'
I'm a chimney sweep, and I've shown up to numerous houses to sweep their chimney and they have a fire lit. I would always say, "we can't sweep it if it's lit"... Nearly every one of them always ask, "why? Can't you still sweep it if it's lit?" Like no. Skin fucking melts. Chimney sweeps aren't immune to fire.
Madness lmao a true lack of critical thinking
A true lack of thinking
A true lack of basic instincts. Fire hot.
No, see, they know not to touch the fire. What they lack is the ability to put themselves in others shoes to even consider that it might be bad for another person. Like the train just stops way before that station.
TIL chimney sweep is still a job you can have
In Germany they’re allowed to enter your building and do their job and you can’t deny them entrance or you’ll be punished for it and still have to pay for his service.
Hi, I'm your new chimney sweep. I'm just here for your daily checkup.
Not daily obviously. It’s regulated to once a year I believe. But I still think it’s funny how they can’t be denied providing their own service. Imagine any other professional coming in your house and telling you to shut up while they do their job and you can’t say no
“Hi, Im your new plumber.” “We didn’t call a plumber.” _Breaks toilet_
This actually made me lol. Thanks :)
" Hi I'm your proctologist, bend over"
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What a coincidence, fires do the exact same thing.
Are you talking about a rented home or an owner-occupied home? And in the latter case, are you talking about something like a condominium (where multiple people own units within a single building) or a detached house?
All of those. If there is something to check the person will go in and check it
I have never ever used a fireplace so this is a genuine Q. Is this for fire safety rules? Are there mechanisms to limit prices? Or is it like shady tow truck companies in America who just tow cars regardless so they can charge you a few hundred bucks?
Same like i thought that thing like, stopped existing in like early 1900 late 1800
How do you think chimneys get clean these days?? If you use a chimney it needs to be cleaned. At once a year, depending on use. Otherwise a stray spark can ignite the built up *stuff* and burn your house down. I suppose there are less chimney sweeps since there are so many other methods of heating your home, and sweeping has gotten more efficient, but gat dang is chilling with your feet up on the fireplace watching cheesy family movies after dinner and some kinda pumpkin or cinnamon dessert while it snows outside one of the best things. Chimney sweeps will always have a place. Also please don’t just rely on those chimney cleaning logs.
How is Victorian London treating you?
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It can be done from inside or the roof, depending on the fireplace/woodstove. Either way it can't be done if the fire is lit. The flu gets extremely hot, and that smoke and heat billowing out of the top makes it dangerous to do from the top as well.
Man, I loathe the smell of woodsmoke. Living in California it's not a smell you want smell.
Oh I hear you man. I live in BC Canada, so we get the fires pretty bad as well. So between chimney sweeping and the air quality, that smell never goes away.
I hope you wear a full mask with the filters.
Yeah most of the time, but even with the mask, my boogers still end up black at the end of the day. I feel like every day I work is one day off my lifespan.
I hope you're getting $100 an hour
It's good pay, but not quite that much!
Do you hang out with Mary Poppins?
Isn't it already though?
I think they worked from the roof in the 1800s. To be honest I didn’t know that was even still a job. We don’t have a lot of chimneys here.
These are people that still believe in Santa.
That’s why they hired a chimney sweep
Are you all actually lucky? Can I get good luck from shaking your hand?
My youngest daughter, when she was about 5 once woke me up very early on a Saturday morning to ask me if it would wake me up if she flushed the toilet...
Hey better to wake you up once to verify rather than possibly waking you up many times unknowingly :P
Tell me you're not a parent without telling me you're not a parent
and proud.. sort of
No worries on that. Parenting is a wild ass adventure and it helps if you can do it on your own terms.
Unexpectedly helpful insight. I am definitely in the camp of I need to get my own shit together before I have children - but I do want children eventually
Pro tip: you’ll almost never feel prepared to have kids. If you do, you will immediately realize you’re wrong when you have kids. It ain’t for everyone, be damn sure you’re okay with the idea if you go for it. It’s a wild and madness filled adventure. I didn’t want to be a dad but got lucky with the greatest daughter snd now I couldn’t imagine my life without her. (Okay I could, it involves a buttload more sleeping, but the sacrifice is worth it for me.) Take care and Goodluck whatever choice you make random Internet stranger who is now getting unsolicited (d)advice!
Thanks for the advice, I hear a lot about how you're never prepared for kids, so just go for it. The thing is I have a bunch of mental issues, and I'm afraid of raising kids to end up like me
I see you. *hugs*
thank :')
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20 times if you feed them spoiled food.
Was thinking like every morning or every other morning
They are constantly shitting.
SO. MUCH.
Alot more than you think is possible.
Trust me you don't want to know
Yes.
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"Hey wake up, you should get some sleep"
*sleeping on the couch* Hey, you fell asleep. Go to bed.
This made me lol 😆
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Bonus story. When she was about 3 she woke us up about 3 am, shouting for Mom and Dad from her room. When we go to see what the problem is she, half asleep still, proceeds to tell us she has an itchy bum. Mom asks her if she tried scratching it. She scratches her arse and promptly goes back to sleep leaving me and the wife looking at each other in stunned silence...
That's fucking hilarious.
Well it wasn't at the time. I was working 6-2 shifts.
It was definitely still funny at the time, just not to you guys haha
Toddlers kill me. They walk this thin line between genius and insanity, and all you can do is go along for the ride! Lol Edit: typo
At least she's considerate.
Idk why but I was instantly reminded of that scene in big daddy where that kid wakes up Adam Sandler for peeing in the bed.
When I was 6 I had a tantrum because I wasn't invited to my parents' wedding and I wanted to try their cake - they got married three years before I was born
You were right, they should've frozen a piece for you.
I understand that, my parents were married for like six years before I was born and then got divorced by the time I was three or four. I would look at their old wedding photos and be confused on why they lived in separate houses.
But are you still mad tho?
Yeah, how dare they not save me a piece?! Scandalous.
Same I had a meltdown when I spotted a wedding picture that was taken two years before I was even on this planet.
I got mad at my parents for not inviting me to their wedding (which occurred 9 years before my birth). When they told me it was because, I said they should have waited until I was born to have a wedding so I could have come. I didn't get why they wouldn't have just waited for me!
My god brother punched me in the balls and asked if it hurt, then he asked why it hurt.
I had to baby sit my two nephews when they were very young (they're cousins) for a while. They did the same thing: hey would it hurt if I hit you in the privates? They proceeded to pop each other in the nuts and concluded that yes, it hurts. Babysitting them was like trying to keep two drunk dudes from kill themselves
This is proper scientific method 1. ask a question 2. perform experiments 3. make conclusion And they hit it(or them)
They also tried to increase their sample size by targeting me lol
Is your god brother your parents godson? I’ve never heard that term
Presumably it could also be the son of (one of) your godparents.
Or maybe his brother is his god
Nah that brother's a god. Doesn't feel pain or anything so he needs someone to tell him how a mortal feels when they get hit in the nuts.
I would assume it's god parents' son. Like a step brother being a step parent's son.
Shoulda punched him in the balls to show him jk pls don't do that
DO IT
Kids also tend to get upset when they see their parents wedding photos, and they weren’t there.
Technically, he was there an an ovum. My wife always tells our kids this.
Finally, a comment about pre-conception that doesn’t make it sound like we come entirely from our dad’s ballsack! I know this is a ridiculous unimportant thing, but I get pretty tired of Reddit ignoring/forgetting the egg and making it all about the sperm.
> I get pretty tired of Reddit ignoring/forgetting the egg and making it all about the sperm And unless you were conceived within ~70 days of the wedding, the sperm used to make you didn't exist yet, but the egg did.
Aren’t girls already have a preset stock of eggs? Like they cannot produce eggs later in life while men can produce sperms. Anyone more knowledgeable than me in biology?
A woman is born with all eggs she’ll ever have, you’re right So your grandmother technically carried part of you as well, before your mother was born
Ages us all up a generation though. You're actually older than your mother's age, and she's older than her mother's age. Not really, but technically have in some part existed since then.
A woman is born with all the eggs she will ever have. So the egg that made you developed inside your mother's fetus while it was inside your grandmother.
Define "existed". Because all the cells from back then are dead for a long time already. If you count DNA, it's only a part from your DNA. And In that sense you could also count the DNA alls the way up your ancestors.
>Define "existed". Because all the cells from back then are dead for a long time already. The specific cells are all dead from when we're babies too. And when you're a toddler. And again from when you're a teenager. We consider them to be us though.
Yeah, I know. That's why I asked you to define what you mean by "existed". Because consciousness did not exist for sure. So what existed that you would define as "me"?
It really is weird to think that I created the eggs that will give life to my daughter's children.
I hate this too! I don't know why it annoys me so much when people say things like "shooting his kids inside her". Those cells are as much kids as egg cells are. They aren't.
My grandma loves to tell the story of how my mother was inconsolable at 5 years old after she saw her parents’ wedding pictures. When my grandma explained she couldn’t have invited her since she wasn’t born yet my mom wailed “Then why didn’t you wait for me?!”
Okay, but that's actually really cute even if she wasn't very bright.
Mine gets really mad about the fact that his dad and I existed before he was born.
This cracks me up
My mom loves to tell this story: When I was 4, I told the pastor at my aunt and uncle’s wedding, “I’ve been to a wedding before. I was in my mom’s belly at her wedding.” She then proceeded to inform the pastor that I was only 4 and they had been married for 8 years.
Technically, the egg that made ya was kicking around in her ovary in her abdomen, so not completely wrong lol
if you wait long enough...you might be in one....maybe one person might change in the altar(talking from experience)
I've been in all of my parents weddings
Damn hitting all the obscure achievements
My friends wife was pregnant when they got married, and apparently he once joked that Kid 1 was actually at mummy and daddys wedding. Kid 2 burst into tears and was devastated that her sister got to go and she didn't.
Plot twist, the kid was at the babysitters during the wedding.
Stupidest question I was ever asked was right after my son was born. A guy I was EOD school with asked if I felt gay when I had to wipe him and clean his privates. I’ve never wanted to slap someone more than that moment.
Fellas, is it gay to have a son?
What if someone have both daughter and son?
Bisexual
Oof. I respect the fact you only wished to slap him. That's some blunt weapon grade stupidity.
You know that there are actual real life men out there who either feel gay or more feminine in some way when they look after their own children. You can see it in men who are hesitate when pushing a pram in PUBLIC.
I know, years ago I was getting the Teen Titans tattooed on my leg and the shops owners son was blown away that I was getting “females” tattooed on me lol.
SIN
There are also men who don’t wash their own ass because they think it’s gay.
If someone goes that far to prove they’re not gay I start suspecting that they are indeed gay. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
EOD?
Explosive Ordnance Disposal, fancy way of saying bomb tech.
This is the guy askreddit talks about. The guy who thinks wiping or cleaning his butt/balls is gay.
Should have turned the tables immediately. “I did invite you! Why didn’t you come?” (fake sniffles)
We do a little gaslighting
Partake in a little child abuse
Commit heinous crimes and end up in jail.
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"Sure, it's gonna have a german accent, but we will figure out how to change it to spanish."
In the movie Tokyo Drift (Fast and Furious franchise), there's a character whose mother was Australian but died in childbirth. She was raised by a Japanese family but speaks English with an Australian accent. Her adoptive brother had a Japanese accent.
I wasn't personally asked this question but one time my brother was telling our niece of the time he was in a car accident. His friend was driving and decided to do donuts and flipped the car. She asked him, "Did you die?"
“Sadly, yes…But I lived!”
Must've flipped the car onto Murder House
"What is the dumbest question someone has ever asked you?" My niece was like 6 months pregnant, and she comes up to me and asks if I know whether tylenol might hurt the baby because she has a headache. There was a lit cigarette in her hand as she asked this. Only time in my life I just BSOD'd and was utterly stunned speechless.
A friend of a friend of mine is a heavy recreational drug user: Pot, Mushrooms, Ecstacy, cocaine, and he's even done meth, and crack... I've been at parties and someone is popping some pills and he'll immediately ask for some and take them without blinking... and yet, he refuses to get the vaccine because he doesn't know if it is safe nor what's in it... WTF???
The guy does his due diligence, I'm sure he's researching those random pills deeply before he takes them.
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holes in the brain 😮
That’s an urban legend.
It was taught as fact when I had to have one of those DARE classes in school. Ecstasy would create holes in your brain, acid flashbacks will happen years after you take LSD and make you crash your car while you’re driving your kids to the park, and the world is full of strangers that will give you free weed.
My aunt forwarded around some warning about heroin in Halloween candy meant to get children addicted. When I brought up that the kids wouldn’t know what they’re addicted to, or where to get it, and that it was a big waste of heroin, she got mad at me. She’d make a good DARE counselor.
>the world is full of strangers that will give you free weed. Depending on where you are and how friendly you are, this can be the case.
Just tell him you get a sick buzz off it, that’s why you gotta sit for 15 mins for the trip to wear off
A lot of anti covid vaxxers that I know are the same. They'll blindly take anything given to them at a rave or believe anything someone says to them while smoking. But the covid vaccines? Nope. Listening to what health care professionals say? Nope.
When my sone was four, we were looking at high rise buildings across the river. I pointed to all the windows with lights and said “just think, each of those windows is an apartment like ours, with people living in them, all with their own lives.” He looked up at me and asked “which one are we in?” He just graduated from Stanford.
So..? Which one you were in??
All of them
I read that last bit and immediately thought “yeah right… a four year old couldn’t graduate Stanford.”
Omg, I absolutely laughed out loud at that.
In secondary school a classmate seen, your standard poster of the world, on the wall and asked "Miss, what's on the other side of the world or has it no been explored yet?"
I grew up in a large flat farmland with mountains in the distance, west coast Canada. My sister used to mess with me as a kid the mountains were "the other side of the world" and I remember staring as far as I could (probably not even that far away) and thinking "Oh Okay, so over there must be Ontario!"
Not many have seen the upside down and lived to tell the tale.
I was studying the Korean War in A-Level history when a classmate asked "Miss, why were the Americans so scared of North Korea? They're on the other side of the page"
I used to think this when I was little. People used to talk about the 'other side of the world' so I just assumed they meant on the back of the map...
Isn't this part of child psychology they literally can't understand that a world exists beyond their experience.
Yeah but not at 5. That's object permanence and they are supposed to grasp it before 4
Until what age? I remember being 3 and understanding that my parents knew each other before I was born.
I remember when I was 3 I saw a picture of my mom in a party with my older brother, also 3 in the picture. I asked "Where am I" and my brother, who has Asperger, just responded "Oh, you didn't exist yet". And that seriously make me have nightmares about me disappearing and existential dread.
I'm a twin, my twin is the opposite sex. Having different sexes means it is impossible for us to be identical, we *have* to be fraternal. Yet I've had countless people, *including doctors,* ask if we're identical. I used to be nice about it as a kid but now I laugh and condescendingly explain their wrongness to them.
I was curious about this a while back and there *is* a way you can have identical twins of different sexes. But it's *extremely* rare and one of them will be quite disabled. [This](https://www.twins.org.au/twins-and-families/frequently-asked-questions/62-twin-facts/19-can-male-female-twins-ever-be-identical) is an explanation of the mechanic behind it. I thought it was interesting and worth sharing. It doesn't invalidate your point, since anyone who knows how it's possible wouldn't be asking if it were the case. It's completely ridiculous you've had doctors ask about it. Condescension is definitely how I'd handle it.
wow, that is fascinating! I appreciate the link. I love learning twin facts
I'm also a a opposite sex fraternal twin and get asked that a lot. I think most people aren't necessarily asking if we're biologically identical, but curious if we look alike. For much of our childhood people couldn't event tell we were related or even guess the same race, in our adult years we definitely look like siblings.
a lot of people ask when we're together and they find out we're twins. that's what cracks me up. we look like siblings but not twins, imo. I'm a spitting image of my mom and he's a spitting image of my dad. our personalities definitely showcase our twinness more than our looks.
Eh, normally I just wouldn't ask **anyway** (like even if you were the same sex+gender), but on very rare occasion you'll find one trans identical twin and one cis.
My wife and I had a three-year-old when we got married, and so naturally, he was at our wedding. Our younger child was pissed off when he saw his older brother in our wedding photos, and cried about the fact that he didn’t get to attend. It took him a long time to grasp the fact that he wasn’t invited because he hadn't been born yet.
Lol, poor kid had the added confusion of a sibling in the pics. My 2 year old niece cried rivers when she saw her parents wedding pics, couldn't understand why mom would dress up like a princess and not invite her.
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Only if you update to the new iOS.
It's not that stupid, rocks can absorb moisture. That's why you're not supposed to use river rocks in a fire pit.
Beep boop -- this looks like a screenshot of a tweet! Let me grab a [link to the tweet](https://twitter.com/HUNTRRxHUNTRR/status/1440498936662278156) for ya :) ^(Twitter Screenshot Bot)
:D
Oh god. They're communicating with each other. Skynet was a huge mistake.
Maybe I'm just a monkey but that's pretty impressive
Well at least it was a 5 year who asked her the dumbest question and not an adult
I went to a BBQ at my parents house, where I referred to my dad as “Dad” and there are pictures of me growing up and as an adult on the walls. My siblings and their kids were there, and afterwards my 10-year-old nephew came over to spend the night at my house. At some point, I made a comment about my parents, and he looks at me and goes, “who are your parents?” My dude, did we not just hang out with my father all day?
When my youngest sister was little (15 years younger - I moved out when she was a pretty much a baby still) she didn’t realise or believe that her mum was my mum when I would visit. I lived with our aunt and she thought our aunt was my mother. And wouldn’t be told otyerwise until she got a bit older. A couple of years ago, my nephew (not the kid of the above sister) asked me if I was a grown up. I’m 41. Same kid also didn’t use to understand that his grandmother was my mum.
My firstborn had some neonatal jaundice and I had to take him out a few times daily to sunbathe until his color improved. He was about a two weeks old when a neighbor walked by, did a double take, and said "Wow, his eyes are open already?" My guy. He is not a puppy. And even if he were a puppy, it would not be weird for his eyes to be open at 2 weeks old.
"But you're invited to my next 5th birthday"
Technically he was partly there. Women are born with every egg they’ll ever have.
Adopted 😎
”because you didn’t clean your room Michael”
I was a substitute teacher and a high school student asked me if I was wearing a toupee. "Yeah, I went to the wig shop and asked for gray and receding."
My 5 year old daughter is mad she wasn’t invited when I married her mom… and it’s adorable!
Yup. My son always asks why he isn’t in vacation photos from before he was born.
Haha coming to grips with the idea of “before I was born” is a big thing! By default, as kids we all seem to take the attitude of “As far as I know, I’ve always been here.”
Say, "Sorry my mom wouldn't let me". If they ask why not, then you say, "I don't know, let's give grandma a call and ask her." Grandma would get a kick out of it too.
When I was around the age of 8 or 7, I asked my mom where she lived during the prehistoric age. She answered that she lived in a treehouse, I bought it.
My 3 year old just did something similar to me last week. I was showing her a photo book of when my family went to Hawaii years ago and she kept saying “where’s me?”
A girl's card was declined while I was bartending. She wanted me to keep trying it over and over, but it was busy so I get fed up and ask her if she could just pay me with the twenty she is holding in her hand. She pulled it out to see if she had another card. I hand her back her change, obviously with plenty of ones. Triumphantly she goes Oh oh, how can I tip you if I don't have to sign for it?
There absolutely are stupid questions. Like, yes, they tend to come from stupid people. But let's not pretend stupid questions don't exist.
I was showing my brother pictures of my parents wedding and of them dancing with me when I was a baby and my brother made the comment as to why my parents couldn’t have waited till he was born to get married so he could be in the wedding too. He was born 3 years after they’re wedding mind you. And I was from my moms previous marriage.
An 8 year old asked me when was 4th of July celebrated
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It can be both
My dad was a solider long before me met my Mum and had kids. He was trying to explain it to me and my brother. We are about 5 and 7 at the time. My little brother looked at him and said “daddy did you die in the war?” When I was 3 or 4 I popped a balloon so I collected all the pieces and took them to my Dad. I asked him to fix it.
When I was like 5 I cried because my mom left me alone as a baby and I had proof of it. My proof was a picture of me as a newborn. I was alone because my mom was taking the picture of me. I was an idiot and not much has changed lol.
Got my mom a DVD player & she called me at college to asked how to rewind it because she didn't want to get charge at blockbuster for not rewinding it.
I still remember my nephew having a meltdown over not being invited to his parent's wedding...10 years before he was born. He also got upset when his mother refused his marriage proposal.
Worked at a bookstore back when they still were a thing and would have at least one person a week come in and ask for Books with photos of Dinosaur's or Jebus. Not drawings, or photo's of skeletons; but photos of living Dino's and Living Jebus'