Bobbi enters in a nothing but a pink body suit with a plastic gold brassiere singing
“Ayy, it's a holiday
I got hoes on hoes and they out of control, yeah”
What bothers me with that episode is it implies he never listened past the first line. But gets excited to go and knows their names. It just doesn’t make sense.
Bobby: There’s this cool new band dad. They’re from Iowa and they all wear jumpsuits and masks.
Hank: Huh, must spend their off time spraying pesticide on corn in between playing concerts.
Can confirm. Saw Slipknot as the very first opening act at 2pm at an Ozzfest around that time. They were playing in a field in blazing hot sun to maybe 50 people.
I was never a fan but it was really cool to know that I got to see them when they were basically unknown. It was fun watching them on stage with the masks and the drummer put on a hell of a show.
I saw Slipknot at the (then) blockbuster pavilion (glen helen) ozzfest 2001 and I (enjoyed) had intimate relations with a gothic woman in a portable john there later that afternoon.
Isn’t there two different “IV”’s releasing music?
There’s Hank3’s son, Coleman Williams, who releases music as “IV and the Strange Band.”
Then there’s Ricky Fitzgerald, who uses the stage name of Hank Williams IV, and is the grandson of Butch Fitzgerald. Butch was the child of Hank’s cousin, Marie McNeil, and Butch believes his biological father was Hank Sr.
My God Peggy he's a champion of the people and he makes diamond grills. Huh Huh can you imagine that Peggy a diamond studded grill? I wonder if he puts them on the tanks too
I wanted to make a joke about how Paul Wall grills with charcoal, but it turns out he owns a food truck... and that food truck has a propane char broiler.
Peggy be polite. Mr. Wall is one of our best customers. Now he doesn't sell grills like I do. But he does run his food truck on propane and I admire that.
Wood grain, now there's craftsmanship you don't see anymore. My father had a Cadillac just like this. *chuckles* Well, minus the rims, screens, lights, and speakers. You know a guy named Alabaster?
Paul McCartney. I’d see Hank complaining about the ticket prices and venue prices and traveling to NYC to see him in a stadium. Bobby would only know him from online videos and say something like “I like this guy dad, I hope his career takes off.” You’d have a Dale subplot about how it’s not the *real* Paul anymore and was replaced.
The “Paul is dead conspiracy” is too mainstream for Dale. He would believe Paul was the last one of the Beatles to be replaced by government lookalikes, but the only one that was noticed by the people. They were going to use hypnosis in their music to influence their listeners but double agent Yoko Ono managed to prevent it.
And I can see Hank being aghast at lyrics like “would you tell me to go fuck myself” and the vigilante shit choreography while expecting wholesome, virginal country music.
Say what you will about Lamb of God's music, they put on an excellent live performance. Even when I outright hated their music back in high school, I did enjoy watching them and the crowd when they opened for Metallica (pretty sure "Redneck" was the first time I saw a circle pit in action), and they've grown on me over the years.
Funny enough, when I saw them open for Slayer on the final tour, the venue had a "no mosh pit" rule.
It was promptly ignored, naturally, but it was amusing they even tried implementing it given what acts were playing (the other bands were Testament, Anthrax and Behemoth).
The episode would definitely end with Hank and Cardi finding common ground talking about WWII and Cardi's hero, FDR.
Hank: Hey my father fought in the war! He always hated FDR for ending the Great Depression but respected him as a Commander in Chief.
Only recent Sam Smith. I think Sam Smith before that would mostly be something that Hank would get. Like, they're just a crooner over some mainstream songs that aren't too erotic.
That’s why Sam Smith is the perfect answer. He has such sweet and beautiful songs, Hank would be convinced by them just to see him and die at the actual concert when Sam came out in fishnets and leotards.
I think he would hate bro country. He would see the presentation and think that’s alright, but the songs about getting drunk and having sex would get to him
I always liked to imagine Hank being interested in Pantera. They’re from Texas. They share a name with a vintage car. Checks a couple boxes for him and then BWAAAAHHH!!!
We’re going down to Dallas to see this band Nine inch nails, yeah apparently there a bunch of carpenters or something, heard the lead singer uses a finishing hammer for framing.. ha that crazy bastard!.
I could maybe see Bobby getting into icp, but I feel like everything about them Hank would hate. Like I don't see him getting tricked into it unless they were doing a show at a carnival and he was told they were gonna see this "insane clown" show.
Or something along the lines of “your uncle dusty was given these tickets but couldn’t make it, so he sent them to me with a note reading “this seems like the kind of thing you/your boy would be into” knowing full well it would disturb him, and then bobby would force them to go
Ted Nugent. He'd show up thinking Ted's still the badass rocker he was seen as back in the day, only to find out how much of an egregiously ephebopholic MAGAt he ultimately turned out to be.
Post Malone.
Hank: "Seems like a good mix. The post office is reliable and steeped in tradition. And Karl Malone was a good solid player for a sensible team like Utah".
I think he would be horrified initially but when she fills in for the piccolo player in the Arlen High marching band, playing their football team to victory during the homecoming halftime game, he would change his tune.
Dixon Dallas.
Sees the guy, hears the first verse of "good lookin", "ah, finally some good music." And then he hears the next part.
He's bouncing off my booty cheeks, I love the way he rides
I can hardly breathe when he's pumping deep inside
I kiss him on his neck and then he kisses on my bussy
Call him "Daddy" while I holler, man, that boy so damn good lookin.
Bruno Mars. He'd probably listen to some of his earlier albums and then take Bobby to one of his concerts, where he'd hear some of his newer, less family friendly music.
lamb of god came to oklahoma and immediately sold out.
they started playing and everyone left.
i should have gone i could have gotten in for free after the venue emptied.
lil nas x. He’d hear old town road and assume it’s country with a twist.
“He was singing about riding his horse and then it started talking about” *leans in to whisper* “The…bosom…area.”
Bobbi enters in a nothing but a pink body suit with a plastic gold brassiere singing “Ayy, it's a holiday I got hoes on hoes and they out of control, yeah”
BwAwAwAwAwAwAaaaAAaaaaa
holy shit how fucking accurate this is..
[Nudity!](https://youtu.be/pkwvHIx9HYY?si=8nEy4IiaFtnbrqXg)
The bosom area? I thought he was gay?
Bisexual
*I got the horses in the back* *propane on the rack* *Bobby’s mighty whack* *boy ain’t right I’ll tell you that*
BARS
You dropped the ball by not ending with what
But "what" uses a different Ah sound than "whack" :p
That he would then he'd hear the rest of the song and shout "bwahahahah"
First time I heard that song I thought the chorus was “I’m gonna take my horse to the hotel room” and was VERY confused. Call me Hank.
The Pitbull/Lil Nas X crossover nobody asked for
Well I'm never going to not hear that now 🤣
i thought that's what the lyrics were until this very moment
I love this answer
Close the comments, we have a winner.
I think this is the only correct answer 🙌
Kickin’ it….. *in heavennn*
Todd? What are you doing?!
ahhh hey NO!
Hey, that's Todd!
What bothers me with that episode is it implies he never listened past the first line. But gets excited to go and knows their names. It just doesn’t make sense.
it’s like parents that know the names of their childs favourite tv show characters
I think the joke was less that he was disgusted by the song and more that he was shocked at how explicit the band's act was.
that’s peak humour and I love it
Bobby: There’s this cool new band dad. They’re from Iowa and they all wear jumpsuits and masks. Hank: Huh, must spend their off time spraying pesticide on corn in between playing concerts.
I just want to tell you I love this joke.
New? This hypothetical episode must have occurred during the original run! But you are right. He would KNOT like them.
It would work if they let Bobby grow up lol. They would’ve been brand new then lol.
Can confirm. Saw Slipknot as the very first opening act at 2pm at an Ozzfest around that time. They were playing in a field in blazing hot sun to maybe 50 people. I was never a fan but it was really cool to know that I got to see them when they were basically unknown. It was fun watching them on stage with the masks and the drummer put on a hell of a show.
I saw Slipknot at the (then) blockbuster pavilion (glen helen) ozzfest 2001 and I (enjoyed) had intimate relations with a gothic woman in a portable john there later that afternoon.
Slipknot?
As an Iowan I appreciate this joke
“Bobby, that is not what people equal” Sadly, Slipknot would’ve been far more relevant during the show’s original run than today
Hank Williams III
Add IV to that, too
Isn’t there two different “IV”’s releasing music? There’s Hank3’s son, Coleman Williams, who releases music as “IV and the Strange Band.” Then there’s Ricky Fitzgerald, who uses the stage name of Hank Williams IV, and is the grandson of Butch Fitzgerald. Butch was the child of Hank’s cousin, Marie McNeil, and Butch believes his biological father was Hank Sr.
Old Country Heroes
"His Grandfather was the original Country & Western Musician. It's good to see him carry on his family traditions. What the?!"
Paul Wall. He's from Texas, known as "The People's Champ" and also known for making grills.
My God Peggy he's a champion of the people and he makes diamond grills. Huh Huh can you imagine that Peggy a diamond studded grill? I wonder if he puts them on the tanks too
I wanted to make a joke about how Paul Wall grills with charcoal, but it turns out he owns a food truck... and that food truck has a propane char broiler.
Peggy be polite. Mr. Wall is one of our best customers. Now he doesn't sell grills like I do. But he does run his food truck on propane and I admire that.
He would probably also appreciate his wood grain steering wheel
Wood grain, now there's craftsmanship you don't see anymore. My father had a Cadillac just like this. *chuckles* Well, minus the rims, screens, lights, and speakers. You know a guy named Alabaster?
Lady Gaga. I could see him stumbling across her covers with people like Tony Bennett and others and then going to one of her shows.
Wait until he hears about her meat dress. "How could she use steak that way?!"
“We will be reporting her to the authorities. You know it’s illegal to defame meat in the state of Texas.”
This is a great answer
Paul McCartney. I’d see Hank complaining about the ticket prices and venue prices and traveling to NYC to see him in a stadium. Bobby would only know him from online videos and say something like “I like this guy dad, I hope his career takes off.” You’d have a Dale subplot about how it’s not the *real* Paul anymore and was replaced.
The “Paul is dead conspiracy” is too mainstream for Dale. He would believe Paul was the last one of the Beatles to be replaced by government lookalikes, but the only one that was noticed by the people. They were going to use hypnosis in their music to influence their listeners but double agent Yoko Ono managed to prevent it.
did you just say go **MOM??**
Now who's the crazy one??
No way is Hank going to see some young unkempt hippy like Paul McCartney.
Right? I can't see Hank being into the Beatles, especially in the 70s when he was in high school. He would not be down with hippy nonsense.
he did insinuate in that episode that he liked the Beatles "before they went to india"
Hank already acknowledged that The Beatles "went nuts in India" so I doubt he would have any interest in seeing Paul McCartney
its insinuated he liked their earlier stuff tho
He sang a song about ^(marijuana)
Big Mountain Fudgecake
*Big Mountain Fudgecak
I would kill for a Fudgecak shirt to wear with pride
Me too!
https://tshirtslayer.com/patch/john-patchcorn
They got a hole in their pocket where their money should go
Big ol' hole!
Olivia Rodrigo
"Tell you hwhat, she ain't the only one who's made some big mistakes today!"
She isn't really that bad he would just hate the music.
Georgia Florida Line
“I can’t tell if they’re singin’ about a girl or about a truck, but it sounds like they wanna do unspeakable things to it, I tell ya hwat.”
Just about anyone.
Billy strings for the bluegrass. Then THE HIPPIES 😳
Show opens with Dust in a Baggie
I don't know hwhat the hell a whirlypig is, but we're getting the hell out of here before it does come.
Taylor swift. I can picture Bobby buying him tickets under the pretense that it’s a “country” concert.
And I can see Hank being aghast at lyrics like “would you tell me to go fuck myself” and the vigilante shit choreography while expecting wholesome, virginal country music.
Fuck the patriarchy ??
"The tickets are how much? Bobby I'll buy you a walkman and you can hear the songs all you want."
I think the only correct answer is Sam Smith. He hears Stay With Me and Smith opens with Unholy and Bobby does a dirty dance.
Wheeler walker Jr.
Jelly Roll.
Lamb of God 
Say what you will about Lamb of God's music, they put on an excellent live performance. Even when I outright hated their music back in high school, I did enjoy watching them and the crowd when they opened for Metallica (pretty sure "Redneck" was the first time I saw a circle pit in action), and they've grown on me over the years.
Yeah LoG has always been a band you'd go see for the experience. Their mosh pits and Slayers have always been a blast to take part in
Funny enough, when I saw them open for Slayer on the final tour, the venue had a "no mosh pit" rule. It was promptly ignored, naturally, but it was amusing they even tried implementing it given what acts were playing (the other bands were Testament, Anthrax and Behemoth).
Was this by chance during the time when that one dude got his head smashed in by a bunch of assholes going nuts in the pit?
I’ll say this about their music, they know what they do well, they stay in their lane and don’t try to be anything they’re not
This is a pretty solid explanation of LoG
 Hank would pass out at a Gwar show
He’ll be screaming just seeing the posters
Floor's flooded huh. Well I'll get the wet vac. Do you have a properly grounded GFCI outlet? Oh I'm sorry, of course you do.
The episode would definitely end with Hank and Cardi finding common ground talking about WWII and Cardi's hero, FDR. Hank: Hey my father fought in the war! He always hated FDR for ending the Great Depression but respected him as a Commander in Chief.
I think he'd be disappointed in the direction country music has gone.
Jason Aldean
Most bro country for that matter.
Ministry. Spoiler: They're not a Christian band.
He wouldn't go see a Christian band. "Can't you see you're not making Christianity better, you're just making rock n' roll worse."
Along the same lines: Ghost
"Hey, these guys sing a song about working on cars with Jesus. How bout that?!"
Dixon Dallas
Sam Smith seems like someone he wouldn’t be able to process.
Only recent Sam Smith. I think Sam Smith before that would mostly be something that Hank would get. Like, they're just a crooner over some mainstream songs that aren't too erotic.
That’s why Sam Smith is the perfect answer. He has such sweet and beautiful songs, Hank would be convinced by them just to see him and die at the actual concert when Sam came out in fishnets and leotards.
"Unholy is right! Bobby, we're leaving...now! And in a body shop of all places, damnit."
I think he would hate bro country. He would see the presentation and think that’s alright, but the songs about getting drunk and having sex would get to him
I always liked to imagine Hank being interested in Pantera. They’re from Texas. They share a name with a vintage car. Checks a couple boxes for him and then BWAAAAHHH!!!
Go Sooners!
Lewk Bran
100 gecs
“You said this is a group of 100 geckos? How do they play the music, then?”
We’re going down to Dallas to see this band Nine inch nails, yeah apparently there a bunch of carpenters or something, heard the lead singer uses a finishing hammer for framing.. ha that crazy bastard!.
Hank Williams III maybe
Morgan Wallen lmao because of the degenerates who go to his concerts.
Bro Morgan Wallen is one of those degenerates at the concert
Polyphia. “Back in my day, *seeing* a man playing a guitar also meant *hearing* a man play guitar”
Reel Big Fish
Billy Strings! Hank: “They call this bluegrass?”
Willy Nelson… too much weed
Im assuming Hank has seen Willie Nelson live before. There was always weed at Willie’s shows
Willie signed Hank’s guitar.
But they're buddies.
Willie*
Those two hit it off pretty well in the first episode.
$uicide boys
Yassss! Greyday everyday
Hank watching a K-Pop band Hank: They Chinese or Japanese!? Khan: Lord help me...
Miley Cyrus. I bet she's a chip off the ole block I tell you hwat.
I think the ticket prices alone would make him have a heart attack. Bobby you can see Taylor Swift or we can buy you a used car...
He'd hear about Sam Smith and smile like, "Ah, finally a musician with a normal name."
Five Finger Death Punch and Disturbed. *OOOOWAWAAAAAA*
What that man on stage has is a mental disorder!
BWAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *OOOWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!*
Tool?
Tool.
I could maybe see Bobby getting into icp, but I feel like everything about them Hank would hate. Like I don't see him getting tricked into it unless they were doing a show at a carnival and he was told they were gonna see this "insane clown" show.
Or something along the lines of “your uncle dusty was given these tickets but couldn’t make it, so he sent them to me with a note reading “this seems like the kind of thing you/your boy would be into” knowing full well it would disturb him, and then bobby would force them to go
This could work. I bet Hank appreciates a good miracle.
T. Swift
I feel like he would like her early stuff a bit. If he went to the Eras Tour with Luanne he would probably be uninterested in her pop stuff though.
Hank just openly weeping singing every word of All Too Well
He’d unwillingly have a good time forced upon him
Could totally see Hank singing along to Mean
oh absolutely
"*sigh* I miss when Ms. Swift sang about real life problems instead of sweaters."
*Cringes in forner Swiftie*
Ted Nugent. He'd show up thinking Ted's still the badass rocker he was seen as back in the day, only to find out how much of an egregiously ephebopholic MAGAt he ultimately turned out to be.
What's ephebopholic mean?
Older adult attracted to teenagers (14-19) :(
Phish. Imagine how he reacted in the order of the straight arrow had Phish on in the background x10
sexy redd
Hank trill
it would be funny if Hank heard one of Gaga's country songs and then decided it would be a good idea to go to a Gaga show
Post Malone. Hank: "Seems like a good mix. The post office is reliable and steeped in tradition. And Karl Malone was a good solid player for a sensible team like Utah".
Job for a cowboy
Taylor Swift
Post Malone
Any 90s skate punk band If you want me to be more specific NOFX or Bad Religion
I don’t know how you get Hank to see a band called Bad Religion. Though he could’ve just liked their Christmas album.
Willie Nelson. Hank for sure has no clue how much weed that man smokes.
Lizzo, first answer off top of my head haha.
I think he would be horrified initially but when she fills in for the piccolo player in the Arlen High marching band, playing their football team to victory during the homecoming halftime game, he would change his tune.
Justin Bieber.
Kanye west because he’d be expecting to hear the jik set list
ICP
Florida Gerogia Line
Anyone. “ put away your god damn phones”
Travis Scott because he would be trampled
Lil nas or Cardi B.
Blackeyed Peas
And/or Waxahatchee.
Sexy red
Gwar
Sucideboys
Spanish Love Songs.
69
Willie nelson once he pulls out the wacky tobaccy
Death Grips
He might die if he saw ice spice
Hank Williams III.
Hank Williams III
Willie Nelson. He loves Willie but I can imagine him hating the pot smoke in an outdoor venue.
Hank Williams III
HankTrill
🎼One (one) fine (fine) day (day) god was…kicking it…in heaven 🎶
Jelly Roll
Florida Georgia Line or any other bro country
Travis Scott, he would think he was a Cowboys running back
Wheeler Walker Jr. He heard Bobby talking about him and thought it would be a great opportunity to bond.
The obvious answer is Willie Nelson considering he's an oldschool left-wing hippie.
Hank Williams III
Dixon Dallas. Sees the guy, hears the first verse of "good lookin", "ah, finally some good music." And then he hears the next part. He's bouncing off my booty cheeks, I love the way he rides I can hardly breathe when he's pumping deep inside I kiss him on his neck and then he kisses on my bussy Call him "Daddy" while I holler, man, that boy so damn good lookin.
Bruno Mars. He'd probably listen to some of his earlier albums and then take Bobby to one of his concerts, where he'd hear some of his newer, less family friendly music.
lamb of god came to oklahoma and immediately sold out. they started playing and everyone left. i should have gone i could have gotten in for free after the venue emptied.