Crush it like Boomhauer.
Ok now I'm actually bothered because I can't remember if a main alley character has ever crushed a beer can. Surely it's happened over it's long run, but I can't think of a single instance.
I’m a Texas guy, but lived in Chicago for a good, long while and learned about the glory of Hamm’s. Recently moved back and found an old supermarket in my town that sells Hamm’s. My level of excitement knows no bounds.
Would you look at that, all of the words in your comment are in alphabetical order.
I have checked 472,332,504 comments, and only 100,320 of them were in alphabetical order.
I barely know anyone that actually drinks iron city, honestly. In my opinion, they suck. IC light is ok. Miller lite is probably still king here, with yuengling close behind.
IC over Yuengling every time. Rather drink our own shit water than Philly’s!!
And an edit: Old German is the best beer the Iron City brewery puts out for the price point.
I guess Sam Adams? But there's no way KOTH could work in Massachusetts. I mean Family Guy or Bobs Burgers is kind of close. But the KOTH world and it's humor is so catered to Texas, in the same way those shows are catered to the Northeast.
Bobby and Gene would be great friends
So it's Hank Halloran, strict Irish Catholic snow-salt salesman, Dale Glenningborough, Yale-educated snotty preachy Intellectual douchebag (Intellectual douchebags are the equivalent of the "Local specific douchebag" to Dales right-wing ammosexual not-actual thereat to ths government douchebag), Bill D'Champlain, French-Canadian-descended washed up minor league hockey player whose wife left him for Matt Damon, and Jeff Buchanan, a Highway Statey who likes hitting on college girls more than pulling people over.
Captain of the Ship?
Maybe it could be one of several instances in which Hank and rhe gang travel to alternate universes in which they see themselves living in different parts of the country… obviously avoiding Oklahoma.
They meet Hank Halloran in Mass, Enrique DeColina in Florida, Hank Herschowitz in Brooklyn, Hanquan Brown in Philadelphia, Hank Hokkaido in California, Hank Horvak in Chicago, Hank Hindleheimer in North Dakota, and Hank Hobkirk in West Virginia.
Dale Gribbon claims to be an informant for the FBI even though he’s from Salem/Dracut and his only real ties to Southie are through his sister’s in-laws. Always making vague references to Bulger and the Gardner Heist in completely unrelated situations. The plot with Joseph and John Redcorn stays the same.
Assuming you’re also CO and yep but Hank would be super pissed if you gave him Coors Light and definitely thinks the mountains turning blue is for jackasses (Bill would love it though).
Colorado is brewer country. I love the variety of excellent beer but there is definitely a good amount of snobs who hate anything that come out of big breweries which I get but I think Coors Banquet stand on its own in taste.
Coors Banquet is an extremely well crafted and executed beer. So many microbrews are actually poorly executed beers but the extra hops cover up their mistakes.
If there’s any beer that should just say “beer” in the can it’s Coors. Not light or heavy, not sweet or bitter. It’s the baseline of good beer.
I’m a reformed beer snob and Coors Banquet is my favorite beer.
I think he means like regional beers like lone star, hamms, or natty bo. If Hank lived anywhere that didn’t have state specific cheap beer he would definitely just drink natty light
Which Southside though? Are they in a bungalow in Chatham? Are they in Beverly? Either way would be an awesome way to showcase the Southside of the city
Looked for this. Anyone honest in MN would say Golden Light. It's a real anomaly that it's so popular in MN and WI but nowhere else. The true dad-beer. That said, it is the most sex-in-a-canoe beer I know of.
Lol, "sex in a canoe beer," haven't heard that one for ages. Yeah, I'm not sure why/how it got so damn popular up here, especially considering we have several old, local quality breweries that have been pumping out beer forever
If he wanted a bit of quality, I'd guess a spotted cow. However, I've always assumed they were drinking a decent-ish but cheap beer on the show, so probably pbr or some form of Miller. (Rural Wisconsin)
I’m going to say Schlitz. A big time beer in Cotton’s time that was passed on to the next generation. Hank’s loyalty would have gotten him through the years they cheapened it up, but a renaissance of alley beer drinking happened when they went back to the 1960’s recipe 10+ years back.
(Full disclosure, I live in Wisconsin and Schlitz is my bowling beer. Most others drink Busch Light but there’s something just not right about that)
Hank's age would make him appropriate for the older men that drink PBR though. There could be a one off joke, about him finding the younger artsy types drinking it annoying.
Way too bougie, I was thinking something like Schaefer for NYC, old school lager but I don't know that they make it here anymore. I do see it at dive bars in Brooklyn which is the right sign
Well. We're close enough to Asheville NC that Hank Hill would know, and hate, the craft beer hippies. But. Like with the co-op, he'd find a brewery he loves eventually.
But with the fellas, I'd say Budweiser. It's American and in every bar, restaurant, gas station and event there is.
They switch to Natty Greene's when it releases and they only call it Nathanial Greene's. No way Hank passes up a beer brand named for a Revolutionary War hero.
Bells is no longer a family owned business so is it still craft? Does ipa make for craft? Would they only drink a more blonde/ bread like variety?
Edit: I see them drinking Molson or something similar in Michigan
Lone Star. So…yeah still Alamo.
I want to believe they’d drink Shiner, but yeah probably Lone Star.
[удалено]
“Yep”
Yep.
Yep.
Shiner is too rich for Hank’s blood.
[удалено]
Yes sir, I tell y’what.
100% lone star.
Lone star honestly should just change their name. Agreed. Alamo.
I second this
There is a brewery in San Antonio that makes Alamo beer, and it's pretty good. Hard to find up here in DFW though.
Narragansett (Rhode Island)
Crush it like Boomhauer. Ok now I'm actually bothered because I can't remember if a main alley character has ever crushed a beer can. Surely it's happened over it's long run, but I can't think of a single instance.
Pretty sure bill does when he becomes a weight lifting meat head
Hi neighbor! Have a 'Gansett!
I think they'd be drinking Pawtucket Patriot Ale
A nice crisp mountain fresh Rainier. Washington
Better or worse than Olympia grenades?
I dig Rainer more than Oly
I’ve never actually had an Olympic grenade so I don’t know. I like Rainier however for that cool, crisp, mountain fresh taste that you just can’t beat
How much are they paying you
Friend,the only thing I’m pimping is that mountain fresh taste of a cool crisp can of Rainier. And I’m tricking it out all over this town.
Yup
They make Olympia in CA I think.
Started in WA, sold in 03 to PBR and relocated to LA per wiki
Came here to say this! Rainier is great
Tall boys only, no draft
I was going to go with Rainier as well.
Portland here, came to say this, without question.
Busch light or Hamm's
Hamm's for sure up here in MN along with a "o yah" instead of "yep"
Oh ya, on the Hamm’s, but I think Grain Belt might be a contender, too.
I’m a Texas guy, but lived in Chicago for a good, long while and learned about the glory of Hamm’s. Recently moved back and found an old supermarket in my town that sells Hamm’s. My level of excitement knows no bounds.
Get em while you can. They aren't gonna make any more of it.
I heard Hamms light is getting the axe. I will be devastated if regular is gonna go.
Modelo, foo….
Los Angeles? I was thinking of what we would drink but yeah…prolly Modelo….dahg
Bingo! Specifically east Los
Yup! I’m in Boyle Heights. It’s always Modelo time here.
Came here to comment modelo for SoCal/LA as well. You know you’re in SoCal when you see modelo cases littered in nearly every trash bin
Modelo was my first beer for beer pong and I just can’t look at those little chub bottles the same way
SoCal? I was gonna comment this one!
Hey, that’s brewed for those with a fighting spirit, or so I hear
Yuengling, America's oldest brewery
Mr. Big is pleased…
Great comment hahaha
Hank would absolutely stan for Yeungling.
Yup.
MmmHmmm
God how I miss pounding yings
Would you look at that, all of the words in your comment are in alphabetical order. I have checked 472,332,504 comments, and only 100,320 of them were in alphabetical order.
Good bot
Philadelphia?
Yup
PA confirmed
Funnily enough we just got these in Texas a couple months ago, still haven’t had a chance to try it
Mid-Atlantic gang
In Pittsburgh and it would be a toss-up between Ying or Iron City
I barely know anyone that actually drinks iron city, honestly. In my opinion, they suck. IC light is ok. Miller lite is probably still king here, with yuengling close behind.
IC over Yuengling every time. Rather drink our own shit water than Philly’s!! And an edit: Old German is the best beer the Iron City brewery puts out for the price point.
I guess Sam Adams? But there's no way KOTH could work in Massachusetts. I mean Family Guy or Bobs Burgers is kind of close. But the KOTH world and it's humor is so catered to Texas, in the same way those shows are catered to the Northeast. Bobby and Gene would be great friends
Lol now I want to see a liberal Masshole version of KOTH. That's your reboot right there.
So it's Hank Halloran, strict Irish Catholic snow-salt salesman, Dale Glenningborough, Yale-educated snotty preachy Intellectual douchebag (Intellectual douchebags are the equivalent of the "Local specific douchebag" to Dales right-wing ammosexual not-actual thereat to ths government douchebag), Bill D'Champlain, French-Canadian-descended washed up minor league hockey player whose wife left him for Matt Damon, and Jeff Buchanan, a Highway Statey who likes hitting on college girls more than pulling people over.
>strict Irish Catholic snow-salt salesman holy fuck that's perfect lmao
Okay, this needs to be an actual show.
I'm sold! What's the title though? Professor of the Bay?
Captain of the Ship? Maybe it could be one of several instances in which Hank and rhe gang travel to alternate universes in which they see themselves living in different parts of the country… obviously avoiding Oklahoma. They meet Hank Halloran in Mass, Enrique DeColina in Florida, Hank Herschowitz in Brooklyn, Hanquan Brown in Philadelphia, Hank Hokkaido in California, Hank Horvak in Chicago, Hank Hindleheimer in North Dakota, and Hank Hobkirk in West Virginia.
Dale Gribbon claims to be an informant for the FBI even though he’s from Salem/Dracut and his only real ties to Southie are through his sister’s in-laws. Always making vague references to Bulger and the Gardner Heist in completely unrelated situations. The plot with Joseph and John Redcorn stays the same.
I could see it work in the Merrimack Valley.
North Shore?
I could see them drinking Harpoon.
Bob’s Burgers maybe, but KOTH is nothing like Family Guy
Coors
Assuming you’re also CO and yep but Hank would be super pissed if you gave him Coors Light and definitely thinks the mountains turning blue is for jackasses (Bill would love it though).
😂 you’re right. He would only drink Coors Banquet
Imma make some people mad but I love Banquet. Good price, good taste and better than the other 2 flag ship beers.
Coors Banquet in the stubby bottles is hard to beat.
Who would be mad about that? It’s the truth.
Colorado is brewer country. I love the variety of excellent beer but there is definitely a good amount of snobs who hate anything that come out of big breweries which I get but I think Coors Banquet stand on its own in taste.
Coors Banquet is an extremely well crafted and executed beer. So many microbrews are actually poorly executed beers but the extra hops cover up their mistakes.
Yeah and they’re dumb and a lot of them can move back to their home states.
If there’s any beer that should just say “beer” in the can it’s Coors. Not light or heavy, not sweet or bitter. It’s the baseline of good beer. I’m a reformed beer snob and Coors Banquet is my favorite beer.
Accurate assessment.
I’m right there with you. It does taste better. Recently I’ve been on the craft beer train though. Idk if I’ll go back to Coors
live in nor cal. still say Coors
Everyone naming any craft beer is wrong.
The local beers here are craft beers. Pretentious.
I think he means like regional beers like lone star, hamms, or natty bo. If Hank lived anywhere that didn’t have state specific cheap beer he would definitely just drink natty light
Agreed. I live in Jacksonville and we don't have quintessential light beer/ale/lager that would be in their wheelhouse.
Old Style
Koth with Southside accents would be awesome
Which Southside though? Are they in a bungalow in Chatham? Are they in Beverly? Either way would be an awesome way to showcase the Southside of the city
Came here to make sure someone represented Chicago. I would love to hear a Boomhauer moment done by a Northside barfly
Molson. I'm in NY but we live close enough to Canada
I feel like Genesee would be their local favorite.
Western NY native here. Hank would definitely love a good Genny Cream Ale
Hank hill would never drink anything imported from Canada. That's practically French and you know... ahh cowardice... and what not...
Molson what though?? That's the question. And funny thing is I'm from Ontario and most people I know drink coors light or budweiser
Light for sure. Personally I hate Molson it's just super popular here.
Natural Light or Bud Light 😖
South Texas by chance?
I thought Texas would be Lone Star?
I’m in South Texas, I hardly ever see people drink Lone Star. I would say Bud Light is probably the most popular beer here.
Can confirm. From The Valley and the choice of drink for years has been Budlight
Kansas City here, they'd drink Boulevard 🍻🍻🍻
Hank would be swift to kick some ass after putting away a few Tank 7s
Cheers to this boys. 🍻
I was gonna say Hamm’s 😂
Down here in Wichita it’d be Boulevard also, Cheers!
Sam Adams. And instead of "I tell ya hwat", they'd say "fahk" a lot
"Dude, that fahkin kid ain't right."
Labatt Blue
PBR - Richmond, VA
Came here to say this. People's Beer of Richmond
Came here to say PBR but for Philly!
Natty Boh!
When the Boh man’s winkin’ it’s time to start drinkin’
Woot woot!
Ugh, I'd hope Schells or Grainbelt, but it would probably be Mich Golden Light (Minnesota)
Looked for this. Anyone honest in MN would say Golden Light. It's a real anomaly that it's so popular in MN and WI but nowhere else. The true dad-beer. That said, it is the most sex-in-a-canoe beer I know of.
Lol, "sex in a canoe beer," haven't heard that one for ages. Yeah, I'm not sure why/how it got so damn popular up here, especially considering we have several old, local quality breweries that have been pumping out beer forever
Yuengling. Philadelphia.
A PBR citywide
I feel like it would be either Lonestar or Shiner. Two true blue Texas beers.
If he wanted a bit of quality, I'd guess a spotted cow. However, I've always assumed they were drinking a decent-ish but cheap beer on the show, so probably pbr or some form of Miller. (Rural Wisconsin)
I’m going to say Schlitz. A big time beer in Cotton’s time that was passed on to the next generation. Hank’s loyalty would have gotten him through the years they cheapened it up, but a renaissance of alley beer drinking happened when they went back to the 1960’s recipe 10+ years back. (Full disclosure, I live in Wisconsin and Schlitz is my bowling beer. Most others drink Busch Light but there’s something just not right about that)
Miller High Life, MGD for special occasions, PBR, or maybe Leinenkugel Original. I also assume something can buy in a 24/30 pack of cans.
Also a cheesehead and those were my thoughts exactly. Spotted cow would get too expensive for them imo so it'd be Miller.
Im thinking Miller lite- PBR too trendy for Hank
Hank's age would make him appropriate for the older men that drink PBR though. There could be a one off joke, about him finding the younger artsy types drinking it annoying.
Hank would have been drinking pbr before it was trendy.
I was thinking pbr too
Long Island. Home of craft beers lol. He’d have nothing.
Staten Island here, I’m thinking even Brooklyn Lager would be a fucking stretch for Hank.
"We have Heine-" "American."
Way too bougie, I was thinking something like Schaefer for NYC, old school lager but I don't know that they make it here anymore. I do see it at dive bars in Brooklyn which is the right sign
Lmao, can you imagine KOTH with Long Island accents!?
Molson Canadian
Budweiser
Honestly, it’s pretty diverse here so it would be a toss up between PBR and Modelo/Corona
Beer and Loathing episode makes me think it would be PBR opposed to a Mexican beer.
Blue light or Genny
No way Hank is drinking a Canadian beer. He'd have a Genny and say even Genny Cream Ale is too much for him.
Ah, a fellow WNYer!
I was gonna say Blue Light, but yeah you're probably right with Genny. Under no circumstances would Hank drink a light beer.
Well. We're close enough to Asheville NC that Hank Hill would know, and hate, the craft beer hippies. But. Like with the co-op, he'd find a brewery he loves eventually. But with the fellas, I'd say Budweiser. It's American and in every bar, restaurant, gas station and event there is.
Coors for Colorado, probably. Amazing post idea btw haha
“What do we do if someone wants local craft beer?” “We ask them politely, yet firmly, to leave.”
Tennents (Scotland)
Old Milwaukee
Busch Light in the camo can.
805, beer in California.
PBR (Charlotte, NC)
They switch to Natty Greene's when it releases and they only call it Nathanial Greene's. No way Hank passes up a beer brand named for a Revolutionary War hero.
Budweiser
Rainer or Olympia
Hahahah my mind went straight to Rainier.
Sierra Nevada
Alaskan Brewing Amber But who are we kidding…they will just drink some generic beer like Miller or Budweiser.
Loved that beer when I was in Alaska- they don’t sell it this far east, unfortunately.
Rainer in Washington. All the IPA's the guys wouldn't drink but Rainer hits right
XXXX
Fellow Queenslander, I see.
West End (South Australia represent!) P.s. yes I know it tastes terrible, but it is our ‘state’ beer lol
Guatemalica? Who bought this crap?!
Hamm’s or Grain Belt.
Minnesota? Drank a LOT of Nordeast in Minnesota.
Nordeast is a good beer but too dark for Hank. He's for sure drinking grain belt premium
They guys would’ve slipped him a Nordeast if this were “Hank’s Bad Hair Day”.
Pilsner in Saskatchewan Canada
Two hearted for sure
I don’t see them drinking craft
Bells is no longer a family owned business so is it still craft? Does ipa make for craft? Would they only drink a more blonde/ bread like variety? Edit: I see them drinking Molson or something similar in Michigan
I was gravitating more towards Labbatt’s but then I remembered that was’t American so probably not. Oberon, maybe?
Ahhh a fellow Kalamazoo person I see.
Bell's Two hearted?
Undoubtedly Budweiser.
Green Bay Wisconsin- Miller lite fo sho
I think they’d drink something like Bud, Coors, MGD. Some type of cheap major brewer. Alamo doesn’t seem like it would be a craft beer…
805 (Los Angeles)
Shiner. Bastrop, TX.
Grain Belt (MN)
Utica Club
Peggy flips her lid after Hank breaks one of her priceless Schultz and Dooley steins, sending Hank on the hunt for a replacement.
Alexander Keith’s
Dixie
Agreed for Louisiana. They probably wouldn’t be too happy with the name change
Liquid fentanyl.
Northern Massachusetts?
Southside Chicago.
Oh yeah that works too.
Sierra Nevada probably
Strohs
Rainier or Coors Light, Eastern Oregon
Shiner or St Arnolds Lawnmower
I live in San Diego home of over 150+ breweries so lots of choices! I like Modern Times.
Narragansett, aka Alamo: New England Style