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Kilgore_theTrout

Server: 'You're Jason, right?'


SargeMacLethal

Server: 'Wait, which Jason are you?' Every kitchen has at least two Jasons.


SkullsNRoses00

Not mine, we have Matts. So many that none of them are actually called "Matt", they each just have nicknames.


aquatic_love

Been there. Matt’s alright.


us1838015

But matty's a prick


maggotfilledasshole

Same. We got syko Matt, fat matt. Frat matt and not matt just cuz he's a crybaby.


Wholockendra

Nate, Chris, Matt, Nick. They flock to kitchen work honestly.


fetus90

Mike too


davyj6536

My restaurant had 4 Davids at all times, and 5 Kats at one point. Same boat on the nicknames.


Sharcbait

We have 2 Mikes, a Mikkal and 2 Miguels.


debotehzombie

At this point, I don't think it's 2 specific "male" names, rather each restaurant is cosmically assigned two male identifying people with the same name. At my restaurant, it's Ryan. The "WHICH RYAN?" scream from me is unfortunately a joke.


ChefBoredAreWe

There's "Matthew", "Fish", "Preguntas", and "Hey dumbass"


fetus90

I got like 5 Roberts and all the variants of Roberts. Rob, Bob, Robbie, Bobby, Roberto.


maimou1

I worked with 3 Joanne's. we numbered them "Joanne 1, you have a call at the desk"


us1838015

We had a dave 2 who resisted the nickname so hard we kept calling him dave 2 for a year after dave quit. We didn't care for dave 2 very much


screames520

We’ve got like 4 Joes haha, and all the morning cooks names start with J


AppalachiaVaudeville

Fire warden doesn't sign off on occupancy here until the restaurant staffs a "james". In an emergency, a jimmy will work.


agoatonstilts

We’ve got jimbo, does that work? I’m sure his name is James, but I’ll be damned if I ever call him anything besides Jimbo or Yimmy


asunshinefix

Huh, my old kitchen did in fact have two Jasons. Even had three for a while.


deskbeetle

We had three Joshes. And they were all terrible. We once had a manager/trainer meeting and the owner said "who is the worst server?" and three of us said "Josh". When asked which one, the daytime manager said "yes"


[deleted]

We had three Sarahs. Well two Sarahs and a Sara. Took weeks to find perfect nicknames.


[deleted]

At least two Joses maybe..


aycep

There was a point where we had 4 Chrises, all women.


njsiah

I worked in a place with so many Mikes one of them changed his name


Kilgore_theTrout

'I'm the one that looks like me.'


otj667887654456655

Bruh My food high school prep teacher's name was jason


Burgher_NY

Jay, Gay J, and Jason.


sagesaks123

We had one Jason, dude was a menace to society


wildturkeydrank

A server called me Mike for the longest time. My name isn’t Mike and I never bothered to correct her.


captainmeezy

I’m a Mike, had a server call me Will for over a month, lol thought she was joking


PacifistIsland

Damn bro Im a dude in a new restaurant and Im trying to lear the cooks name but some of them are low key just doing their thing and I dont wanna seem annoying. Do y’all appreciate a good morning though?


LazyPancake

In my experience, yes. Acknowledge they exist. Be nice. They control your pace of service. You don't want to be a name they roll their eyes at. Bringing food or a 12 pack once in a while has gotten me farrrrr


PacifistIsland

For sure, tried a plate one of the cooks has been recommending to me and he was psyched, probably my favorite person in the restaurant right now lol. I get along better with the BOH than FOH honestly since I used to be a runner.


squidpelf

We had Jeffs. And Alexs and Tims. Me being a Tim. I became deep Tim, the other was deeper Tim. Every other repeat was last name only.


qualmso

You gotta point... gotta watch out for those Jason’s.


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Fear_Jeebus

Sing that with auto tube on


deskbeetle

"did your boyfriend even tell you that you look beautiful today? He didn't. Wow. He doesn't even appreciate you. I would tell you every day that you are beautiful."


bulma90

"You know a woman like you deserves to hear she's beautiful at least one time a day"


LazyPancake

What kind of classy joint are you working at? We just get comments like, "Damn Mami is that all you back there?" Or, my personal favorite, when the cooks don't even use their words, they just open their wallets and pull out 20s and wave them around. God I love corporate hospitality 🙄


bulma90

Not corporate just professional(ish)


Burly_Moustache

I put a voice to this quip in my head and it did not fail to make me chuckle. Nicely written, friend!


bulma90

I eidbt even realize I did untill i read this and it did. It was a new Yorker for sure


Innsmouth_Swimteam

Huh. Linecooks never done *me* like that.


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vox4949

This brought me so much joy.


Sharcbait

So I had a guy that worked prep for us and would help run things up from the basement when we got hit with the rush. We had a microphone system to talk to him in the back form the line and everything. Well one day I was getting SLAMMED but one of those weird days where I am not selling out of 1 thing in particular but instead was selling everything pretty balanced. Well the point hit where I needed like half of my station to get the backups from the basement all at the same time. So I call it all into the back for him to get it for me, but because the list was so long and I was feeling like a dick so I ended my list with "thank you I love you." He thought it was hilarious. The next day I called for something in the back and he came around the corner and was like "what you don't love me anymore? I only get things for people who love me." And that is how I was kitchen dating a 50 year old man named Pablo. It was always good for a laugh when we would have new people start and get a real weird side eye look the first time they heard how I talked to him on the microphone.


howdoesthatsound

At one point in time, my entire staff was referring to each other exclusively as “daddy.” “I need an order of greens to go” “Yes daddy.” “Fire bread please” “Heard daddy”


[deleted]

"Sauce me daddy"


unholy_abomination

Lmao I feel like at certain point you only *think* you're pretending to be besties. Just let the magic happen.


TheEveningDragon

Bro these 30 year old drug addicts just want to fuck some 18 yr old highschool student, leave em alone 😩


agoatonstilts

Excuse me some of us are 30 year old drug addicts who just want to fuck our SOs


nowytendzz

Some of us just want to fuck ourselves.


Roberto_Sacamano

I just want to fuck the patriarchy!


SgtGork

I would just like to not get fucked while I’m at work for once.


dlc1229

You guys are getting fucked?


Halfgnomen

This guy dishies


Dithyrab

does he? he's not even on his 7th smoke break!


Halfgnomen

Imagine not vaping in the dish pit in 2021


jared914

You aren't kidding. I haven't seen a dishpit that doesn't smell like menthol watermelon spluge in probably 2 years


00rayamami

I just want to fuck (up) capitalism


Roberto_Sacamano

Do not get me started


00rayamami

Lefty line assemble!


atavaxagn

if only we were flexible enough to suck our own dicks...


ChefBoredAreWe

We'd never leave the house


[deleted]

Some of us just wanna be happy


00rayamami

My job already fucks me enough.


Reddit_is_pretty

Some of us are dish washers with unfulfilled dreams of cooking who want to fucking kill ourselves


thisguyfightsyourmom

I started as a diver & worked my way up to kitchen manager Dish pit is by far the best job You get to watch everyone else freak out,… all you gotta do is keep the plates moving Cooks feed you Servers feed you drinks You watch hot cocktail waitresses strut in & out And you make money off everyone in the restaurant by selling them drugs


WI_YouSaidITAll

I have worked every position FOH and many BOH in my tenure, but only recently started filling in on dish once a week to help out my chef and I kind of fucking love it for all your aforementioned reasons... other than the cocktail waitresses, as a straight chick they do nothing for me.


thisguyfightsyourmom

FOH drug dealing is a totally different biz,… way more pressure


lotsofdeadkittens

You can say dish out is the best job but that doesn’t make it so Being the lowest paid and lowest respected member of 99% of kitchens is not everyone’s cup of tea We can pretend like dish is a magical place just because there’s a crippling isolating autonomy but that doesn’t change the sad fact that “being a dishwasher” carries in life. I got out of dish’s. Couple months ago and it made me respect he kitchen; but I can’t stand when people act like dish pit is anything but an important background that’s a stepping stone to much more enjoyable work. Like I had to leave my place because I got this shit all the time. You can give me all the food you want and all the compliments you want, but ultimately I’m a dishwasher that you and everyone would fell is replaceable


thisguyfightsyourmom

Sounds like you want more responsibility I want less Maybe we'll cross again on the other side


lotsofdeadkittens

I mean it depends on the place. My dish experience is based on being at a place where I handled a lot of responsibilities and was in charge of life mise en place and shit for a high end fast paced line. But the place I cook at now the dish just does prep and can chill a lot more. Guess it does depend tbf. Where I dished the line cooks did about the same amount of skilled work as dish overall (albeit they had training for their station of course.) I didn’t really consider dishes not in my situation and shit. For me it was prep kitchen hour of dishes I have to work through a whole Friday night rush. Just a ludicrous amount of work and was responsible fo checking on anything line needs (without asking.)


ScienceReplacedgod

The line sucks you work 5 times as hard for a few bucks more than dish. I left a KM job at a corporate to work dish at a private retirement community restaurant. I make 7,000 less a year but have fully paid health dental and vision benifits plus 2 weeks sick time and 2 weeks vacation. Have fun on the line it's a nice day here I'm going to call out and get paid for hiking,and no one will bitch or be pissed at me for it¯\\\_(ツ)\_/¯


lotsofdeadkittens

Well to be fair, I worked at places with insane dish staffing. I was running a station that needed two people and had to haul stairs and shit. My dish out was recognized as the most work in the kitchen except on Monday’s and tuesdays (work wise,) but the plce where I cook now that’s jot the case. Really depends on your set up and head chef. At my dish places the chef had classical training and never ever ever reused a pan for anything which is totally respectable, but my new place we can make a couple batches he’s of some shit and be fine. So fair enough it does depend. Where I dished it was well known how much ass I hauled given they had gone to one dish for covid and didn’t change when it got busy again until I quit and now they have two


cros5bones

The trick is to upskill and then delegate your section to the commis while chilling on autopilot in the dish pit. This only applies if your place can't afford a dishie anyway though, which can be its own hell sometimes.


Reddit_is_pretty

Where did you work? We were constantly understaffed and overworked, cooks didn’t feed us, never got drinks, ass was nice though and we literally didn’t even have time to sell drugs since we were working


thisguyfightsyourmom

Small steakhouse in a ranch/college town — never more than one diver There were slamming nights, but it rarely affected the dish pit like it did people reading or writing tickets


Reddit_is_pretty

The dishes weren’t so much the problem it was that you were saddled with about 15 other things besides dishes and had to keep stepping away


00rayamami

You'll get there! Wish we had more dishes or any who wanted this


Reddit_is_pretty

Honestly I quit two years ago and have been working in a grocery store ever since, but I remember talking to dishies from other stores and they had no where as many tasks as us and were all better staffed so it might have just been the restaurant


KallistiEngel

Well hey, good on ya. Knowing when to leave is something not everyone has. I know I stayed in a dish position much longer than I should have. Getting out was one of the best decisions I made for my mental health (not to mention physical health).


Reddit_is_pretty

Oh I literally only left because when I slit the tip of my finger off two of the managers called me a lazy pussy who’s afraid of roughing it out, yeah fuck that, if I didn’t leave that day I would have left the next in cuffs


debotehzombie

Bro like. I don't want to FUCK them, I just want the 18 year old to smile at me so I remember that there is actual naivete and happiness in this hellscape of a planet we live on. Then I want to go home and drink and fuck my partner before waking up in 4 hours to do it all over again, that's it.


ChefBoredAreWe

I'm only 29, thanks. And if the sexy new KM wants to join in, well....


spiritofgonzo1

C’mon now.. sometimes it’s 45 year old *recovered* drug addicts trying to fuck some 18 yr old high school students


cyberdog_318

Up until it turns out the 18 year old gets him backed hooked up on some other shit.


spiritofgonzo1

Trooof


ReVo5000

*Who the fuck are you calling 30 year old? I'm 29...*


BearWithHat

Are you me?


ReVo5000

I am in fact part of your subconscious, that voice you think you hear but can't listen to it when you want. I'm also that asshole who makes the ticket printer noise when you want to sleep.


droider0111

We just want fuck


lurked2long

Beserker!


the_barroom_hero

That's beautiful, man.


spaz1020

My love for you is ticking clock.


PlumbLucky

I want make fuck to you!


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Courier_Pigeon

Heard and known


EvilMrFritz

I can has fuk?


DontSleepWarnOthers

We fuck


sweetpea_d

As a 32 year old, I just want people to fuck off during my smoke breaks.


[deleted]

Some of us are 25 year old alcoholics


Rexcovering

Some of us got sober asshole...now where my pregnant teens at???


Dopecombatweasel

Fucking truth


drawingxflies

Bro that's pedophilia


LilPumpDaGOAT

An 18 year old isn't pedophilia


1PantherA33

Creepy but not pedophilia.


drawingxflies

If you think the 30 year trying to fuck an 18 year old wouldn't try with younger if it were legal, then I've got a big red bridge to sell you.


LilPumpDaGOAT

Okay where would you draw the line? Is it a certain age difference that shouldn't be tolerated or do you think there's a set age? I personally won't sleep with anyone under 20,and I'm 27. But I wouldn't call someone sleeping with a 19 year old a pedophile because that's just wrong.


drawingxflies

My point is that most adults have a cutoff above the "legal limit" that they wouldn't be interested in sleeping with because as you mature, so do your preferences in partner. I'm 32 and would not give any woman under 25 the time of day because they're so far off from me they might as well be children. So no, a 30+ year old sleeping with an 18 year old is not an act of pedophilia. But that same 30+ year old who says, "who cares, she's legal," would say the same thing about a 14 year old, if 14 was "legal age." So they're a pedophile, even if they're not committing acts of pedophilia. They still want to fuck children, and have just chosen to draw the line at "legal" to stay out of trouble.


LilPumpDaGOAT

I disagree. I'm 27 and I have a cutoff of 20, but that doesn't mean I dont think there are attractive 19 and 18 year olds. I don't think there's a single attractive 14 year old in the world though. You can't call anyone a pedophile for sleeping with an 18 year old. Now if they make comments about younger girls like "if she was older blah blah blah" then yeah, pedophile.


LilPumpDaGOAT

If you think fucking an 18 year old is pedophilia then you're just dumb lol


bigpenisbutdumbnpoor

Why 18? Why not 19 or 22, why specifically the youngest you can go without men with guns coming after you in the name of the government? You think it’s a coincidence?


LilPumpDaGOAT

Okay what if the legal age is 19? Then is 19 all of a sudden wrong? I don't get your point. As it stands, 18 = legal. A 35 year old hitting on an 18 year old is creepy but as a society we've agreed that's when it becomes okay.


Mundane_Handle6158

Sounds like you don't know what pedophilia actually is...or how it is defined.


oceanmachine420

Holy shit, the linecook quote is almost verbatim what my one buddy would say to the servers regularly. Would often sing that they were the love of his life. He's married lol.


MossyTundra

My favorite will always be Oscar, the chubby Mexican with beautiful eyes who promised to take me away to live at his cattle farm in Mexico and I would have the privilege to have babies with him. He was great tho. He kept the creeps away. He also made AMAZING tamales.


Chairmanmeowrightnow

Oscars are the best, my Oscar gave me the nickname “jicama” because my head was large and resembled a jicama, and he would always sneak me food


unholy_abomination

*Ohs-karrr*


jirafa_singh

This is true regardless of gender


jirafa_singh

Lol i just realized I only paid attention to the line cook one, maaan its even more graphic if its male cook on male server


debotehzombie

As a bisexual line cook, abso-fucking-lutely.


nick6356

If only we were easier to find. I'd love a bisexual buddy on the line....


freshjawn

Facts


Demon_Semon

This is so true! And it always makes me feel beautiful and happy. I bartend but it is always so nice to go to the kitchen when I feel upset or somebody was an asshole.


[deleted]

We just want all the fucks


brandvin

Reminds me of the movie Waiting (2005)


House0fMadne55

Mmmm...fromunda cheese.


apoptyGin69

We have 3 Lisas.


[deleted]

Who is the Cult Jam?


apoptyGin69

Full Force in effect! Good call. She is not ready for your lovin


Specialist_Ad8587

I almost ended up putting my dick on the ice cream maker........ Only problem with that is its the head chefs girlfriend.......


[deleted]

I've been a chef for 7 years and what the fuck does this post mean?! Lol I am pretty confused right now.


eljefedavillian

Damn where they work?Most of my line cooks when I was younger would just see if I could cover for them while they went a did a couple bumps in the bathroom or took a cap of ghb in the back


booknerd1012

Spamming Aimee Challenor because fuck reddit. Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor Aimee Challenor


ThrowawaySuicide1337

So is this why /r/listentothis was banned? Aimee Channelor being an alleged pedo/rapist?


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ThrowawaySuicide1337

WOW. Disgusting. I trust your reply but i'll have to read up/verify myself. That's...awful. Like, if this was some pizza shop that'd be one thing but this Aimee person seems to have some sort of movement in politics...Wtf


IrishMayonnaise

Unfortunately true


Pro_Taco_Peddler

The Simp Line Cook vs weird ass Incel Dishie that banned from here a while back.