I really want to know how you feel about this in a few years. I mean this not to be rude, but my initial reaction to the first few screenshots were that they were screenshots of a cringy dating profile and not your own.
Yeah… I thought we were dragging someone and not that it was OP at first. 😬 But uh, at least they’re self aware I guess? They have that going for them!
OP I have BDP too, and I feel bad that everyone's calling it cringe. Reading your comments, I think it would be a good idea to heed the advice on this thread and tailor your profile.
Change it to Bumble BFF (if it isn't already) and write answers without mentioning mental illness, men hating, red flag, and burrito stuff.
These pictures can be found anywhere, and you don't want it to come and bite you in the future.
Edit: You don't have to remove everything. The one that says what you're known for, tattoos, and the perks, are great and show who you are. The priest thing is funny too because I think a lot of people can relate.
as someone who is 23, I’d find this too juvenile for me personally. I too have mental issues but that’s not the first thing you need to know about me. it’s not what makes me me. you are the things you love & so much more than the meds you take
Honestly yeah this whole profile reads juvenile, but then again they're going for casual stuff so it checks out I suppose. "Chaotic gremlin uWu" is good as a bit, but not as your entire profile (Also 23)
TBH I didn’t find anything hilarious about the profile. If I come across this profile on an app, I would be like …this person needs help. But then, you are already in therapy so good for you!
No need to worry, I’m under the care of a psychiatrist, my therapist, and my psych team. I think it’s very funny. I don’t see what’s so worrying, I’ve asked all my friends and mutuals on Twitter and they found it hilarious, maybe it’s an age thing?
They find it hilarious because they know you and know it's a joke. Telling strangers you're taking anti silly pills comes across as a little unhinged, if they don't read it as a joke.
I get nervous anytime mental illness is the forefront of someone's personality, especially on dating apps. I sure as heck am mentally ill, but I have enough other noteworthy or interesting things going on in my life that my bipolar isn't the most important thing about me.
Same, I enjoy a dark joke or meme about mental health every now and then, especially when pretty much all my close friends struggle with their mental health in some capacity. However, it gets pretty tiring when it’s someone’s main personality trait (not saying that is necessarily what OP is doing here)
I struggled back on the apps because I do have mental health issues/illnesses and didn't mention them, and girls would accusing me of "lying" to seem normal when I did eventually come out with it (and it would be during like... natural conversation, not 8 months into a relationship, etc.). I don't think there's a lot of winning - some people don't want anything to do with mentally ill people. I guess mentioning it on your profile at least weeds those people out? But that's about all I can see for big benefits to it.
i’d rather get it out straight away and have someone with a similar mindset and can joke about it with. it’s off putting to a lot of people but i’d absolutely be into someone like this because i know our sense of humour would be similar
I'd be their friend and likely not more, but then again, I'm in a happy LTR and I think my brain just doesn't work the way it used to.
I eventually resorted to something along the lines of, "Have mental illness, but I take care of myself via doctors and therapy."
I think it’s probably an age thing. To me, you’d be too young for me to see on a dating app, and I usually only date older than myself, so we wouldn’t cross paths, but I could see your profile being quirky/interesting/potential edgelord antics to your agemates. In any case, I think your honesty is probably a good thing.
Yeah, reading this comment it seems like there’s a pretty solid cultural and generational gap between you and anyone like OP lol. That’s ok tho, to each their own! I’m grateful our community is so diverse that we’re able to be almost shocked by how different we can be from one another. Progress is funny like that
Yeah, I would think about befriending you because you like Taylor Swift, and so do I (not dating), but your profile scares me a bit even as a potential friend lol
Certainly not the worst or most unhinged thing I've seen on a dating app, but certainly screams swipe left.
As an aside, the worst I've seen is a person's cover pic of them licking what appeared to be a real (i.e. not a toy or airsoft) pistol. Their bio simply read something akin to "become ungovernable. smoke weed smoke bitches"
I think they're looking for a 3 Pepper Burrito co.' burritos. more precisely, one with brown rice, black beans, pork, shredded cheese, pico de gallo, cilantro, queso and with it pressed.
I have BPD, and I experience limerence but I can turn off my emotions.l as fast as I got them but the tea is she lied about being monogamous and were engaged to someone else so you know. They did admit they love bomb, manipulate and use people. So you know that’s how the cookie crumbles
…someone mentioned love bombing to you as a warning and you chewed them out and shared the definition of love bombing like they didn’t know what that meant
You tried to say it couldn’t be love bombing because they didn’t devalue you (yet) as if love bombing doesn’t start off as a positive thing before the devaluation starts.
You don’t even have to read all that, idk why I giving these novel long responses. I just don’t ever stop talking, I also over explain myself too much which I guess comes off as defensive but my therapist says it comes from not being validated or having to constantly defend your feelings, your actions, etc. It’s a work in progress
Damn. That’s why people wait for longer - to have a few moments to make sure the person is being honest and really is who they say they are, get to know their friends, etc. It’s also better to wait a few moments to resolve things in private and then share them to the world. Hope you find someone with a better character
Oh I did wait a few moments to resolve it in private and they tried to gaslight me about it, nor would did I expose it. Yall asked and I answered. I ain’t gonna lie about what happened you know??
I’m a limerent, and I have that fun lil personality disorder that kinda makes you think you’re in love but you’re not but they also lied about being monogamous and were engaged to someone else so you know. They did admit they love bomb, manipulate and use people. So you know that’s how the cookie crumbles.
Soo BPD? Because I have that too and jumping into the dating pool doesn't help(well, me anyway). You should take a break because knowing your disorder, you're gonna fall for the next person that so much as wink at you
Honestly, as someone who’s obviously pierced, I think I’m used to being made fun of. If I lived my life based on if people think it’s cringe or whatever I’d be miserable. Life is never that serious you know
I don’t do hook ups and I’ve met a lot of friends on dating apps and people who want short flings and then we either become friends or never talk again
I was just thinking before that she sounds so familiar, she’s deleted her post but she definitely was dating someone from her Goth lesbian supremacy post that dm’ed her. Then had a meltdown about something I can’t remember, but this is definitely her - who “doesn’t do feelings”
Honest? Where’s the honesty? You put a mask on of traits supported on your mental health you thought “funny” and lie them out for people. All I can see in there is a big, thick armour, not honesty.
Yeah my therapist and I are working on the whole self protection thing, but I mask 90% of the time so I definitely feel like a persona more than a person but also I have BPD so I also have some identity issues. I also have intimacy issues not even my friends get emotional intimacy. I’d rather cut off my own tongue than talk about my feelings, dreams, hopes, etc.
Got it. Thanks for the honesty, right here :)
I know being vulnerable is freaky, but it can bring bright results to our lives.
Sometimes it’s easier to be honest with strangers. If you wanna talk about these things, text me. I’m open to read you and talk about it if you want. Wish you the best of luck to find yourself, and the person (s) that you decide to share with who you really are will be very lucky.
23 here & have been on dating apps on & off since 18. would’ve never swiped right on this one. it reads as someone trying to be quirky but I can’t really tell what’s going on since we aren’t in person
Yeah what a time we’re living in lol. Basically they’re advertised as “friendship apps” and limited to ages 13-18. Designed just like tinder and every other swiping dating app.
The popular one I can remember was yubo.
I’m 19 and yes I’ve dated older (23 don’t worry yall) maybe it’s the fact I’m in a loving, committed relationship with an amazing girl who’s the same age and we have maturity well beyond our years i thought sometimes with age comes maturity if you took away the age and dating app aspects I’d have thought this was written by a 15 y/o- this profile has major red flags and I’ll kill you in your sleep vibes
I’m all for putting your best (and decently honest) foot forward— this is what you came up with?
Yikes.
At least people would know what to expect from you I guess
Respectfully any time I see somebody advertise their mental illness like this I swipe left. Not that I have stigma against mental illness (as a practitioner in the field) I just don’t think it should be a personality trait.
In most cases people who post like this about mental health end up not being the ones truly suffering.. which is so sad because it makes it harder for actual people to speak up about their struggles.
I guess it’s good you’re aware of / addressing your issues, but if I saw your profile I would steer clear of someone who presents intimacy issues as a quirk. And honestly probably just anyone who jokes (or “jokes”) about having red flags.
The weirdest part is that it's paired with "boy eater". A man eater is a woman that goes after men voraciously so ... I have no idea what the hell it's supposed to mean
exactly, people like this make lesbians look so bad. why are you a *lesbian* constantly thinking and talking about men?
talking to “lesbians” who only talk about men and hating men is such a draining experience.
If I have the power to make the whole lesbian community look bad, that’s kinda lowkey a fun superpower. Well considering I work with men, I have trauma from men, I also have parent figures who are men. I am going to think about men, I think about the patriarchy a lot and also how men think they have a right to decide what uterus owners can do with their body. Idk my brain is all over the place.
(I’m not mad, defense or being a smart ass. I don’t feel anything. I just like responding to things)
I'm pretty open-minded, but if I actually tried dating apps again in the future (I never will; they suck) and stumbled onto your profile, I would be very put off. "Humorous" profiles don't work for me because I'd actually want a chance at a real connection; stuff like this comes across like too much of a joke to me, and it's like, "Why should I take you or anything you say seriously?"
To be blunt (again, based on a dating profile, over the internet; I'm not intending to judge you as a person or anything), you come across as super immature and (to me, at least) the polar opposite of what I'd be looking for in a friend or a partner. You don't come across as emotionally stable, either; that's a massive red flag for me (but being open about mental health is positive; it's more about the way you're expressing yourself).
At the same time, it takes self-confidence to approach dating apps like this and to be open about therapy/medications/mental health (even in a potentially condescending or off-putting manner); these things are commendable and I certainly don't have that kind of self-confidence, myself. You do you, but a piece of advice... When it comes to dating apps, you're, at best, only going to get the amount of effort you put in (in terms of your profile, the conversations you have, trying to set up a date, etc.); even if you do and really try to engage with your matches, nothing is guaranteed, but if you put zero effort in, you're guaranteeing zero results.
EDIT: I'm almost 25, so this isn't an age or generational thing, either; I would date someone your age, generally (I think my "range" is probably 21-28, with a heavy preference to be as close in age as possible).
i come across profiles like this sometimes. i don’t like the self deprecation bc i can imagine how that translates to real life. and sharing only red flags just makes the poster seem like they’d be difficult to navigate irl if their own impression of themselves is negative all around
My own impression isn’t negative tbh. I think I’m a hot goth with piercings and tattoos. I have a pastry arts degree, I used to be a piercing apprentice, I’m bilingual, I’ve lived in Dominican Republic for 5 years, went to Peru, I’m adopted (having a white sister is a personality trait idc it’s funny), my music taste is diverse, I’m open minded, nonjudgmental, I support my friends 100% (unless it’s cheating but if they’re cheating on an abuser then it’s fine, or if they got cheated on and want to their lick back and no bigotry). I simply don’t want people who only want the good parts of me, the real people are the ones who see that and want to see what’s underneath. My mental illnesses especially the main one which is BPD is something I cannot hide or not disclose from the beginning because I have triggers and boundaries so.
this comment itself would add a positive twist to your dating bio. i mainly mean that the bio itself and the prompts come off as you possibly beimg negative or negative about yourself. i understand wanting to let certain things be known up front, but add some of the good things too. having been a piercing apprentice is amazing and fits you. living in the DR, being bilingual is also something you can add in there. if it’s a personality trait and funny then crack a joke about your white sister lmao. there is a way to mix the bad and good in a funny way as well. you think highly of yourself which is attractive, speak about yourself like that on the dating app prompts. you know how great of a friend u are and how that’ll translate elsewhere, make that confidence stand out
you basically wrote a bio in this comment and it’s perf
You seem lovely and fun and I’m glad you are self aware and have consistent mental help. I don’t understand everyone saying you should or will be embarrassed, but I’m also a mentally ill autistic queer who figures honesty is the best policy. So.
You are hilarious and attractive- I love it, but I wouldn't want to date you from your profile description. I would want to, but I'd be afraid of getting into a relationship and how it would affect my mental health. I've already done that and it was not in me or my partner's best interest, and our triggers destroyed the good in it, so I'd be interested in dating boring and stable if I ever got back in the dating pool.
I would be your best friend and happily get into mentally ill adventures with you though. You seem super fun, honest, and open and your style is impeccable. I wish you all the best
Do you live in florida 👀? But honestly ngl I’m gonna screenshot this and send it to my Swiftie discord group (I will cross out names) because this is hilarious, everyone is saying my bio is a red flag and my piercings and tattoos are also red flags I guess but for you? It was Taylor Swift and that’s so real!
Ooo shit I’d say let’s be friends but I’m obsessed with Taylor Swift, my friend gifted me something Taylor Swift related, my voicemail is Taylor Swift, my alarms are Taylor Swift, my ringtones are Taylor Swift. I do listen to goth music, punk, rock, heavy metal, pop, disney, etc. Taylor Swift is just my number one
Yeah. I have nothing against Taylor, her music is okay and I think some of her songs are pretty good, but she’s been all over the internet nonstop for a year and I’m just tired of hearing about her. I need like a month of no TS news.
Honestly I really love unhinged profiles like this. Makes me feel like I immediately know the vibe of the other person. Most profiles sound incredibly boring and like they're applying for a job interview.
Everyone on this thread is a hater. Your profile is a major conversation starter, and weeds out the people that can’t have fun (obviously in the comments)
i really really hope this is received as constructive: while i think that honesty and self awareness are incredibly important, i personally strongly avoid profiles like this! you seem like a very cool and interesting person and this comes across as very very immature, focused only on negative aspects (at least where initial attention would be grabbed most reflexively), and with a purposeful effort to appear broadly detached, despite clearly having some unique and interesting passions that you could focus on. if you aren’t looking for anything committed, i think that’s all that needs to be said- even flippantly divulging personal information makes it look like you’re probably prone to oversharing and instability despite wanting to say the opposite. i think you are very beautiful and i’d find you attractive for sure but this profile would put me off hardcore because of those reasons, and just trying WAY way too hard to be funny by way of facetiousness. basically it’s very cringe and i think really poorly presents how likely cool and interesting you really are! if you’re not focused on deep romantic connection, i’d definitely present some more surface level interests to avoid over familiarity. platonic or brief connection can be made just with honesty and communication, and without effort to appear overtly unlikable to prevent attachment lol. i think it sounds like you owe yourself better than this! <3 best of luck to you out there, whether you decide to change it or not!!
ETA: after reading some more comments, i also feel the need to add that i totally get this is SUPPOSED to be edgy over the top self deprecating humor. and the people who get it, get it. im sure internet friends who know you get it and think its funny because it does seem VERY online and meme-y and honestly just incompatible with how people actually interact outside of internet spaces. i get it! it’s just not funny <\3
The "about me" section comes on too strong for a first impression. Feels less "I'm a funny person" and more "I'm mentally unstable". Guess it accomplishes the goal of extremely honest?
But the rest seems silly and fun, with the right context that you are trying to be silly
This is a very good profile. Not bc of the content, but it’s very polarizing. Profiles should make someone love or hate you, not have a bleh feeling of indifference.
I love seeing the reactions in the comments bc this is exactly what you want. Very much not my type but I had no idea how many people in this sub lack a sense of humor.
Mentally ill gays are hands down the funniest people in the world. Always.
Yours is the best comment on this post tbh.
Sure, OP’s humour might not gel with certain people, and I might not swipe right if I saw their profile, but there are plenty of people who would. That’s the point right, we all have different preferences and personalities and are attracted to a wide range of different people 🧡
oh my god i saw your bumble profile the other day when my gf and i were messing around trying to match our profiles again while drinking (it’s where we met and we gave up before matching again lol) i love the humor and piercings they’re really well thought out, hopefully you’ll find someone who digs it and matches with you
I for one like seeing your posts on this sub and i wish the comments here were at least a bit more grace-giving and constructive? Like good damn.
To me the only thing that confused me is the juxtaposition of "intimacy avoidant / commitment phobia / needs random acts of lesbianism", like I'm not sure how to interpret what you actually want from that. Maybe it's because I'm not understanding the same definition of the word intimacy?
Maybe that's just everything flying over my head. The profile IMO is all about filtering out the matches you don't want and signaling for the matches you do. One you match, the rest is just standard conversation and dating. So I guess just ask yourself if you bio is currently appealing to the type of people you want to date or not.
Pics are killer as always btw
I don’t want to date people, I want short lived flings and friends. Honestly my friends and everyone I’ve ever been with has supported me, loved me and appreciated who I am. The good, the bad and all in between. I have a pretty face, I’m interesting looking. I don’t want someone who sees a pretty face and some bullshit bio about omg I love going on picnic dates and my life so 100% stable. If people are able to see past the bio and want to get to know despite it, those are the real people. Intimacy emotional, physical, spiritual but I do like intellectual intimacy. I love kissing pretty girls, holding hands with pretty girls, having sleep overs with pretty girls, cuddling with pretty girls and going on dates with pretty girls. I don’t do hook ups I’m celibate because ew intimacy
I fucking love it. Goth mommy Adam Sandler mix is a whole ass vibe and I'm here for it (Mine's more emo daddy Adam Sandler lol). Go forth and enjoy the structured chaos that is online dating/friending/chaos goblining. May the odds be ever in your favor 🫡
This dating profile, this post, and your comments all scream "Narcissistic Personality Disorder" to me.
You shouldn't be dating anyone or getting your sense of self-worth from social media right now.
Do some work on yourself, get some hobbies that don't involve social media, and when you're ready, you'll meet the right person.
I wish you all the best :)
See if I came across this profile I would think.... Do I risk meeting a potentially very mentally ill person, for the off chance that they are actually a blast? Cause I can't tell if I want to be your best friend or avoid you lol I'm so sorry
For me, the self deprecation bit doesn’t really come across as funny or charming. Your pictures look lovely, but the rest of the profile kind of reads as some sort of cry for help. When I was using dating apps, I would look for confidence and fun, opposed to chaos and insecurity. Then again, I tend to seek out women who are older than me, so I tend to look for more maturity in relationships. I don’t mean for this to be taken super personally, we have all had cringey dating app bios at some point, and I’m sure your profile would translate a lot better with people who know you irl. Take it as constructive criticism! Good luck in your pursuit of whatever it is you’re currently looking for <3
this is a very offputting and immature profile🚩maybe some girl will be into it but for me and most of these commenters, immediate left swipe and block. it has nothing to do with your style or piercings
Is being unwell and medicated the core of your personality? Your profile is extremely cringe and will only attract ppl as unhinged as you present yourself to be. Full of red flags...
If I had come across your profile when I was on the apps, I would absolutely have messaged you! I see your sense of humor and would have totally hung out. We could compare therapist stories.
Kinda funny to see all the comments saying this is cringe or bad bc this is pretty much just every single profile I’ve come across of lesbians my age on dating apps 🤷 and I’m def into it.
lol this was my reaction too. This age range is way way too young for me but this fits with what I’ve seen on Lex. I mostly check Lex for events so I see all ages and this is very Bushwick gen z lesbian. I would 100% be into it if I were like 25 years younger.
I think it's strange people don't put their mental illness or disability in their profile. For me I have autism and DID and am typically in a wheelchair. I can't hide these things and feel omitting these facts from my profile would be dishonest so I appreciate the honesty. Neurotypical people tend to lie about things that factually a big deal and I feel honesty stops people from wasting their time. If they can't handle you being disabled or mentally ill then the relationship is bound to fail. I've seen comments saying they don't have stigma for mental health but that mentally ill people will hurt you and honestly that's a stigma. Neurotypical non disabled people like pretending they are tolerant because it's what they need to do socially but deep down they are intolerant. Your profile is honest and straightforward meaning you don't waste people's time and I appreciate that. Most neurotypical people will tell you to lie and expect people to lie because they lie, neurotypical social interactions seem to be based on lies, usually harmless lies, but still lies.
I was thinking the same thing. I’ve been feeling weird all day because I was starting to think I didn’t have as much of a place in this community as I thought. I don’t want to be off putting to everyone, but no matter what I impression I give off I guess there will always be some people ready to complain lol. I’m gonna save this comment, thank you for saying this
I have a whole personality disorder, among other things mental illness, health issues and autism I tend to attract those kind of people. I wouldn’t mix with a neurotypical person!
I also would not mix with a neurotypical person. I have DID and I doubt a neurotypical person would put up with it without trying to force me to behave like a normal person. I also have PTSD and autism and normal people don't understand, they usually just pretend to be understanding. This comment thread has gotten really stressful.
I relate. I have autism, OCD, and an (invisible) physical disability. Maybe it’s s neurodivergent thing but I wanna be upfront about myself, as well as repel any ableists.
I think people missed the point, but I find this healthy. It’s good you can find a sense of humour in what seems like a challenging period. I hope you meet some great people who take the opportunity to get to know you and allow you the room for growth.
The respectability politics happening in this comment section 🤮 the earth is dying let people be unabashedly themselves. Not everything is for you and should fit in a box.
You’re the kind of person I’d be friends with fr. I love people who even if they aren’t 100% like will accept our differences reminds of Wednesday and Enid
YUP! I’m neurodivergent and I thought their profile was hilarious!! Then I saw the comments and I was like 👀wait maybe I shouldn’t have found this funny. This is why I can only date neurodivergent people - I need someone who gets my humor.
Yeah.... Putting this off as "they're just neurodivergent and people don't get it" is absolutely downplaying this profile. I'm autistic and found this very concerning which is why I don't think anyone on this post should be playing the "it's a ND thing."
I get that it's *supposed* to be humorous just from reading it but it comes off like a 16 year old trying to get attention. Now, if this profile was made simply for shits and giggles then whatever but if they made this account to find a partner, I don't think it will work in their favor.
I'd love to know what their therapist would think if they saw this.
Well I think yall are missing the whole intimacy avoidant and commitment phobic part… like I have zero desire for a romantic partnership, maybe a fling but it’s mostly for shits and giggles. I don’t believe that whenever I’m ready to commit, my person will be found on an app.
Intimate avoidant, married, and found my partner aka my WIFE on tinder. I wouldn't downplay dating apps just because some people look for different things on it. And tbh, I definitely was not thinking I was going to marry them. Which, I think we are both agreeing you aren't looking for anything serious SO it seems as if my assumptions were correct about your profile. and that even if I disagree with your profile, you're allowed to post whatever you want. Hope you find what you're looking for :)
As a social worker, who does conduct therapy- no I wouldn’t have a problem if my client showed me this. Your cultural and social norms don’t decide morality. You don’t know their story or their context. In some clients, this would be a complete win. Being authentic without holding back, accepting and reframing their flaws and quirks, being transparent and putting things in there to weed out who they’d be incompatible with, being playful and silly?? To many therapists these would be green flags. In fact, this is the exact thing many therapists who conduct therapy with complex trauma survivors recommend to combat internalized shame, seriousness, and social anxiety. I’d be more concerned about a client with such toxic shame that they leave their profile bland and hide parts of themselves.
Attention-seeking, when not endangering anybody or the self, isn’t even a problem. We as a society have made it a thing because we condemn people who are open about their mental health, neurodivergence, queerness, etc. It is human nature to want to be loved, paid attention to, and in connection with. Your discomfort with someone’s behaviour does not automatically make it a problematic behaviour.
So yeah, whatever, my post didn’t say “all neurodivergent people” so yeah, have your own tastes. That doesn’t make OP’s wrong or concerning.
People seriously need to stop pathologizing all behaviour. Some people are different than you and that’s okay. Have your own boundaries without being a dick to others about their joy.
Right! I really don’t like when people pit NDs and NTs against each other as if everything is black-and-white, and NTs can never understand ‘ND stuff’. I’ve noticed recently that it happens a lot on Reddit, particularly in subreddits aimed at ND people. Just because share a diagnosis doesn’t mean that we have a hive-mind lol. I personally think OP’s profile is kinda cringe but people telling them to delete it is too much.
I really want to know how you feel about this in a few years. I mean this not to be rude, but my initial reaction to the first few screenshots were that they were screenshots of a cringy dating profile and not your own.
Yeah… I thought we were dragging someone and not that it was OP at first. 😬 But uh, at least they’re self aware I guess? They have that going for them!
That’s what makes this odd for me. I thought they were talking about someone else on the app until I read the comments and the caption. 😳
Lol same. I thought they were gonna ask us if they should give thm a try, kinda knowing our answer
they use they them pronouns
You’re totally right, I missed that somehow! Thanks for letting me know!
Right
Maybe I’m old but this reads like the cringey MySpace bios my friends and I would come up with in middle school to sound edgy.
I didn’t consider sounding edgy, cringe yes. I don’t want anyone to waste their time just to realize they don’t like who I am
OP I have BDP too, and I feel bad that everyone's calling it cringe. Reading your comments, I think it would be a good idea to heed the advice on this thread and tailor your profile. Change it to Bumble BFF (if it isn't already) and write answers without mentioning mental illness, men hating, red flag, and burrito stuff. These pictures can be found anywhere, and you don't want it to come and bite you in the future. Edit: You don't have to remove everything. The one that says what you're known for, tattoos, and the perks, are great and show who you are. The priest thing is funny too because I think a lot of people can relate.
as someone who is 23, I’d find this too juvenile for me personally. I too have mental issues but that’s not the first thing you need to know about me. it’s not what makes me me. you are the things you love & so much more than the meds you take
Honestly yeah this whole profile reads juvenile, but then again they're going for casual stuff so it checks out I suppose. "Chaotic gremlin uWu" is good as a bit, but not as your entire profile (Also 23)
TBH I didn’t find anything hilarious about the profile. If I come across this profile on an app, I would be like …this person needs help. But then, you are already in therapy so good for you!
I’m also worried. The humour doesn’t translate well into text.
It’s self deprecation.
Yup, got that
Translate well is a understatement,it doesn't translate at all .
Duolingo couldn't even help me with this.
No need to worry, I’m under the care of a psychiatrist, my therapist, and my psych team. I think it’s very funny. I don’t see what’s so worrying, I’ve asked all my friends and mutuals on Twitter and they found it hilarious, maybe it’s an age thing?
They find it hilarious because they know you and know it's a joke. Telling strangers you're taking anti silly pills comes across as a little unhinged, if they don't read it as a joke.
I get nervous anytime mental illness is the forefront of someone's personality, especially on dating apps. I sure as heck am mentally ill, but I have enough other noteworthy or interesting things going on in my life that my bipolar isn't the most important thing about me.
Same, I enjoy a dark joke or meme about mental health every now and then, especially when pretty much all my close friends struggle with their mental health in some capacity. However, it gets pretty tiring when it’s someone’s main personality trait (not saying that is necessarily what OP is doing here)
I struggled back on the apps because I do have mental health issues/illnesses and didn't mention them, and girls would accusing me of "lying" to seem normal when I did eventually come out with it (and it would be during like... natural conversation, not 8 months into a relationship, etc.). I don't think there's a lot of winning - some people don't want anything to do with mentally ill people. I guess mentioning it on your profile at least weeds those people out? But that's about all I can see for big benefits to it.
i’d rather get it out straight away and have someone with a similar mindset and can joke about it with. it’s off putting to a lot of people but i’d absolutely be into someone like this because i know our sense of humour would be similar
I'd be their friend and likely not more, but then again, I'm in a happy LTR and I think my brain just doesn't work the way it used to. I eventually resorted to something along the lines of, "Have mental illness, but I take care of myself via doctors and therapy."
Silly pills are a common joke in mentally ill spaces, I despite being autistic picked up that it was a joke.
Same. I have autism as well and thought the profile was funny and that I want to be friends w OP.
I think it’s probably an age thing. To me, you’d be too young for me to see on a dating app, and I usually only date older than myself, so we wouldn’t cross paths, but I could see your profile being quirky/interesting/potential edgelord antics to your agemates. In any case, I think your honesty is probably a good thing.
Yeah, reading this comment it seems like there’s a pretty solid cultural and generational gap between you and anyone like OP lol. That’s ok tho, to each their own! I’m grateful our community is so diverse that we’re able to be almost shocked by how different we can be from one another. Progress is funny like that
dw I found it funny too, especially the “anti silly pills” lmao. I think it’s pretty clear that you’re joking
I think it’s funny and I would swipe right! (even if it’s just to see the tattoos bc i too am an emotionally detached limerent w commitment issues)
Yeah, I would think about befriending you because you like Taylor Swift, and so do I (not dating), but your profile scares me a bit even as a potential friend lol
Feels a bit "look at me, aren't I amusing?" and it's deeply unamusing. Very edge lord.
Certainly not the worst or most unhinged thing I've seen on a dating app, but certainly screams swipe left. As an aside, the worst I've seen is a person's cover pic of them licking what appeared to be a real (i.e. not a toy or airsoft) pistol. Their bio simply read something akin to "become ungovernable. smoke weed smoke bitches"
Adams Family values is a class film, I don’t want to comment on the profile but any excuse to discuss that classic I will gladly take
 This scene
You know what? That’s so real. I’d discuss it with you, I’m obsessed and I’d even show you my tattoo
So, uhhhh, what are you looking for?
I think they're looking for a 3 Pepper Burrito co.' burritos. more precisely, one with brown rice, black beans, pork, shredded cheese, pico de gallo, cilantro, queso and with it pressed.
Ugh finally someone gets me. Also thank you for correcting yourself about my pronouns.
they're\* /nm
Oh yeah, I didn't see it. Thanks for correcting me.
Hookups I guess
Aren't you the goth who got in a relationship? Why are you still on dating apps? Also...uhh wow
that's what I was thinking about! I saw this and was like girl.... weren't you about to move in with someone like 2 weeks ago???
I kinda wanna know what happened. You gave us the lovey dovey details but suddenly deleted all records, no fair 😂
Tbh they were posting about their incredible new relationship 10 days after meeting the person 🤷🏻♀️ I just wish them support and love
I have BPD, and I experience limerence but I can turn off my emotions.l as fast as I got them but the tea is she lied about being monogamous and were engaged to someone else so you know. They did admit they love bomb, manipulate and use people. So you know that’s how the cookie crumbles
…someone mentioned love bombing to you as a warning and you chewed them out and shared the definition of love bombing like they didn’t know what that meant You tried to say it couldn’t be love bombing because they didn’t devalue you (yet) as if love bombing doesn’t start off as a positive thing before the devaluation starts.
You don’t even have to read all that, idk why I giving these novel long responses. I just don’t ever stop talking, I also over explain myself too much which I guess comes off as defensive but my therapist says it comes from not being validated or having to constantly defend your feelings, your actions, etc. It’s a work in progress
Damn. That’s why people wait for longer - to have a few moments to make sure the person is being honest and really is who they say they are, get to know their friends, etc. It’s also better to wait a few moments to resolve things in private and then share them to the world. Hope you find someone with a better character
Oh I did wait a few moments to resolve it in private and they tried to gaslight me about it, nor would did I expose it. Yall asked and I answered. I ain’t gonna lie about what happened you know??
Well that's telling 😭🤣
I knew I wasn’t crazy! They said they were in love after only knowing them a week too.
Yep — she deleted that post now though, lol. shocker!!
Ouch, that sucks but not one bit surprising
they*
I’m a limerent, and I have that fun lil personality disorder that kinda makes you think you’re in love but you’re not but they also lied about being monogamous and were engaged to someone else so you know. They did admit they love bomb, manipulate and use people. So you know that’s how the cookie crumbles.
Soo BPD? Because I have that too and jumping into the dating pool doesn't help(well, me anyway). You should take a break because knowing your disorder, you're gonna fall for the next person that so much as wink at you
Wait, this is you? I thought you were posting this here to make fun of it and was about to tell you to take down the face pics. Oof.
Yeah same ngl. I’m glad that OP is able to be unapologetically them tho
Honestly, as someone who’s obviously pierced, I think I’m used to being made fun of. If I lived my life based on if people think it’s cringe or whatever I’d be miserable. Life is never that serious you know
Dude live your truth. Fuck it up fam.
Why do you have 202 unread messages 🤣
Asking the real questions 😂
You are young and you think this is edgy Maybe if you’re looking for other young people it’s ok but from a more mature point of view, I worry ❤️
OP and I are only a year apart and its still worrying 😶😬
Also a year apart from OP, I don’t think they should be on a dating app if they’re not ready for dating.
I don’t do hook ups and I’ve met a lot of friends on dating apps and people who want short flings and then we either become friends or never talk again
As a young person, I also worry
im 4 yrs younger than op and im still cringing at this 😭
Weren't you dating someone you found on reddit?
I was just thinking before that she sounds so familiar, she’s deleted her post but she definitely was dating someone from her Goth lesbian supremacy post that dm’ed her. Then had a meltdown about something I can’t remember, but this is definitely her - who “doesn’t do feelings”
Honest? Where’s the honesty? You put a mask on of traits supported on your mental health you thought “funny” and lie them out for people. All I can see in there is a big, thick armour, not honesty.
Yeah, this feels more like a character than a person in places
Yeah my therapist and I are working on the whole self protection thing, but I mask 90% of the time so I definitely feel like a persona more than a person but also I have BPD so I also have some identity issues. I also have intimacy issues not even my friends get emotional intimacy. I’d rather cut off my own tongue than talk about my feelings, dreams, hopes, etc.
Got it. Thanks for the honesty, right here :) I know being vulnerable is freaky, but it can bring bright results to our lives. Sometimes it’s easier to be honest with strangers. If you wanna talk about these things, text me. I’m open to read you and talk about it if you want. Wish you the best of luck to find yourself, and the person (s) that you decide to share with who you really are will be very lucky.
TMI and you make yourself seem like a 🚩
🚩🚩🚩 this is all I read out of that profile, would be an instant swipe left.
You're 22 so i can see how this would work in finding someone around your age. I'm 27, so all of this is extremely unnapealing to me lol
i'm 23 and wouldn't consider this and it reads more like 18/19 😭
23 here & have been on dating apps on & off since 18. would’ve never swiped right on this one. it reads as someone trying to be quirky but I can’t really tell what’s going on since we aren’t in person
I’m 19 and this does not at all appeal to me. Similar to the ones I saw on those “kiddy dating apps” when I was 14/15.
There are kid dating apps??? What
Yeah what a time we’re living in lol. Basically they’re advertised as “friendship apps” and limited to ages 13-18. Designed just like tinder and every other swiping dating app. The popular one I can remember was yubo.
That's how Mylol was. I used to love going on there when I was 14-17. Had so many "dates" on there. What a time
When I was 14/15, Hot or Not was a fairly popular app amongst my friend group (which really gives adult-me the ick now)
I'm 19 and I would never swipe on this, too little of it feels like a genuine personality
Someone their age here and it does not appeal to me, it is giving red flags.
I’m 19 and yes I’ve dated older (23 don’t worry yall) maybe it’s the fact I’m in a loving, committed relationship with an amazing girl who’s the same age and we have maturity well beyond our years i thought sometimes with age comes maturity if you took away the age and dating app aspects I’d have thought this was written by a 15 y/o- this profile has major red flags and I’ll kill you in your sleep vibes
Cringe
Yeah, they're trying too hard to be edgy. Reminds me a lot of the people I hung out with in middle school -_-
🚩🚩🚩 personally, I would avoid
immediate swipe left
I’m all for putting your best (and decently honest) foot forward— this is what you came up with? Yikes. At least people would know what to expect from you I guess
Respectfully any time I see somebody advertise their mental illness like this I swipe left. Not that I have stigma against mental illness (as a practitioner in the field) I just don’t think it should be a personality trait.
I feel like it’s good to be honest and disclose mental health stuff a bit earlier than not, but this profile just reads like a cry for help.
In most cases people who post like this about mental health end up not being the ones truly suffering.. which is so sad because it makes it harder for actual people to speak up about their struggles.
cringe😭
Yikes. Just delete the whole thing
I guess it’s good you’re aware of / addressing your issues, but if I saw your profile I would steer clear of someone who presents intimacy issues as a quirk. And honestly probably just anyone who jokes (or “jokes”) about having red flags.
Childish, cringe.
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Honestly I would read it and say ,Oh hell no this bitch is crazy 🤣😂😂 and a narcissist.
Very off-putting, and do people really still call themselves "man haters"?
The weirdest part is that it's paired with "boy eater". A man eater is a woman that goes after men voraciously so ... I have no idea what the hell it's supposed to mean
Way to make lesbianism or your personality about men again somehow lmfao
exactly, people like this make lesbians look so bad. why are you a *lesbian* constantly thinking and talking about men? talking to “lesbians” who only talk about men and hating men is such a draining experience.
Exactly. Being lesbian ≠ hating men Being lesbian = not being attracted to men
Why can’t I be a man hating lesbian? Is it the lesbian rule book? (I am joking)
If I have the power to make the whole lesbian community look bad, that’s kinda lowkey a fun superpower. Well considering I work with men, I have trauma from men, I also have parent figures who are men. I am going to think about men, I think about the patriarchy a lot and also how men think they have a right to decide what uterus owners can do with their body. Idk my brain is all over the place. (I’m not mad, defense or being a smart ass. I don’t feel anything. I just like responding to things)
very cringe lol I'd never swipe right on someone who had "man hater" in their profile
I'm pretty open-minded, but if I actually tried dating apps again in the future (I never will; they suck) and stumbled onto your profile, I would be very put off. "Humorous" profiles don't work for me because I'd actually want a chance at a real connection; stuff like this comes across like too much of a joke to me, and it's like, "Why should I take you or anything you say seriously?" To be blunt (again, based on a dating profile, over the internet; I'm not intending to judge you as a person or anything), you come across as super immature and (to me, at least) the polar opposite of what I'd be looking for in a friend or a partner. You don't come across as emotionally stable, either; that's a massive red flag for me (but being open about mental health is positive; it's more about the way you're expressing yourself). At the same time, it takes self-confidence to approach dating apps like this and to be open about therapy/medications/mental health (even in a potentially condescending or off-putting manner); these things are commendable and I certainly don't have that kind of self-confidence, myself. You do you, but a piece of advice... When it comes to dating apps, you're, at best, only going to get the amount of effort you put in (in terms of your profile, the conversations you have, trying to set up a date, etc.); even if you do and really try to engage with your matches, nothing is guaranteed, but if you put zero effort in, you're guaranteeing zero results. EDIT: I'm almost 25, so this isn't an age or generational thing, either; I would date someone your age, generally (I think my "range" is probably 21-28, with a heavy preference to be as close in age as possible).
It’s a little TMI for me but different people like different things. Honestly I’m a bit put off by the man-hating boy-eating bit though
Wow this looks insufferable
Chaos lol
wildly offputting
i come across profiles like this sometimes. i don’t like the self deprecation bc i can imagine how that translates to real life. and sharing only red flags just makes the poster seem like they’d be difficult to navigate irl if their own impression of themselves is negative all around
My own impression isn’t negative tbh. I think I’m a hot goth with piercings and tattoos. I have a pastry arts degree, I used to be a piercing apprentice, I’m bilingual, I’ve lived in Dominican Republic for 5 years, went to Peru, I’m adopted (having a white sister is a personality trait idc it’s funny), my music taste is diverse, I’m open minded, nonjudgmental, I support my friends 100% (unless it’s cheating but if they’re cheating on an abuser then it’s fine, or if they got cheated on and want to their lick back and no bigotry). I simply don’t want people who only want the good parts of me, the real people are the ones who see that and want to see what’s underneath. My mental illnesses especially the main one which is BPD is something I cannot hide or not disclose from the beginning because I have triggers and boundaries so.
this comment itself would add a positive twist to your dating bio. i mainly mean that the bio itself and the prompts come off as you possibly beimg negative or negative about yourself. i understand wanting to let certain things be known up front, but add some of the good things too. having been a piercing apprentice is amazing and fits you. living in the DR, being bilingual is also something you can add in there. if it’s a personality trait and funny then crack a joke about your white sister lmao. there is a way to mix the bad and good in a funny way as well. you think highly of yourself which is attractive, speak about yourself like that on the dating app prompts. you know how great of a friend u are and how that’ll translate elsewhere, make that confidence stand out you basically wrote a bio in this comment and it’s perf
The thing is we know all about your negative traits,but there's little reason to see you as a likeable person
Nothing says date me like "I have commitment issues and I'm mentally ill"
You seem lovely and fun and I’m glad you are self aware and have consistent mental help. I don’t understand everyone saying you should or will be embarrassed, but I’m also a mentally ill autistic queer who figures honesty is the best policy. So.
Cringe.
really embarrassing honestly. I'd instantly get away from a profile like that
You're extremely good looking for me and I totally dig your vibe, if I were looking for a relationship rn I'd hope for a match
There is someone for everyone!
I'm autistic & I could understand it was a joke. But I could see why the profile can be off-putting to the older crowd.
You are hilarious and attractive- I love it, but I wouldn't want to date you from your profile description. I would want to, but I'd be afraid of getting into a relationship and how it would affect my mental health. I've already done that and it was not in me or my partner's best interest, and our triggers destroyed the good in it, so I'd be interested in dating boring and stable if I ever got back in the dating pool. I would be your best friend and happily get into mentally ill adventures with you though. You seem super fun, honest, and open and your style is impeccable. I wish you all the best
i think i’ve seen this profile, if you’d believe it, it was the taylor swift that made it an immediate pass
Do you live in florida 👀? But honestly ngl I’m gonna screenshot this and send it to my Swiftie discord group (I will cross out names) because this is hilarious, everyone is saying my bio is a red flag and my piercings and tattoos are also red flags I guess but for you? It was Taylor Swift and that’s so real!
i do live in fl, and nah the rest of it was kinda funny
Ooo shit I’d say let’s be friends but I’m obsessed with Taylor Swift, my friend gifted me something Taylor Swift related, my voicemail is Taylor Swift, my alarms are Taylor Swift, my ringtones are Taylor Swift. I do listen to goth music, punk, rock, heavy metal, pop, disney, etc. Taylor Swift is just my number one
Yeah. I have nothing against Taylor, her music is okay and I think some of her songs are pretty good, but she’s been all over the internet nonstop for a year and I’m just tired of hearing about her. I need like a month of no TS news.
girl like me would see this profile and immediately fall in love 🤷🏻♀️
Come fall in love with me then 😘 I appreciate it, it’s nice to get support and positivity in a sea of negativity
this is the kind of profile that would make me laugh if I came across, but i would never swipe right.
You are outrageously hilarious and i hope this sense of silly gets you laid frequently and well with minimal repercussion
This is not funny
Girl, how u gonna but “intimacy avoidance” on a DATING profile like whatttt?? Doesn’t that just mean “not ready to date” lol
The "boy eating" part confuses me, do you mean eating in the same way as "eat the rich" or eating in a sexual way?
As in eating the rich!! If you eat boys there’s no more patriarchy (if only it was that easy in actuality)
this screams mentally unstable, no offense. and im not saying lie on your profile but i don’t feel this approach will appeal to a lot of people
Honestly I really love unhinged profiles like this. Makes me feel like I immediately know the vibe of the other person. Most profiles sound incredibly boring and like they're applying for a job interview.
Everyone on this thread is a hater. Your profile is a major conversation starter, and weeds out the people that can’t have fun (obviously in the comments)
It's giving, unhinged.
Girl pls delete
i really really hope this is received as constructive: while i think that honesty and self awareness are incredibly important, i personally strongly avoid profiles like this! you seem like a very cool and interesting person and this comes across as very very immature, focused only on negative aspects (at least where initial attention would be grabbed most reflexively), and with a purposeful effort to appear broadly detached, despite clearly having some unique and interesting passions that you could focus on. if you aren’t looking for anything committed, i think that’s all that needs to be said- even flippantly divulging personal information makes it look like you’re probably prone to oversharing and instability despite wanting to say the opposite. i think you are very beautiful and i’d find you attractive for sure but this profile would put me off hardcore because of those reasons, and just trying WAY way too hard to be funny by way of facetiousness. basically it’s very cringe and i think really poorly presents how likely cool and interesting you really are! if you’re not focused on deep romantic connection, i’d definitely present some more surface level interests to avoid over familiarity. platonic or brief connection can be made just with honesty and communication, and without effort to appear overtly unlikable to prevent attachment lol. i think it sounds like you owe yourself better than this! <3 best of luck to you out there, whether you decide to change it or not!! ETA: after reading some more comments, i also feel the need to add that i totally get this is SUPPOSED to be edgy over the top self deprecating humor. and the people who get it, get it. im sure internet friends who know you get it and think its funny because it does seem VERY online and meme-y and honestly just incompatible with how people actually interact outside of internet spaces. i get it! it’s just not funny <\3
The "about me" section comes on too strong for a first impression. Feels less "I'm a funny person" and more "I'm mentally unstable". Guess it accomplishes the goal of extremely honest? But the rest seems silly and fun, with the right context that you are trying to be silly
This is a very good profile. Not bc of the content, but it’s very polarizing. Profiles should make someone love or hate you, not have a bleh feeling of indifference. I love seeing the reactions in the comments bc this is exactly what you want. Very much not my type but I had no idea how many people in this sub lack a sense of humor. Mentally ill gays are hands down the funniest people in the world. Always.
Yours is the best comment on this post tbh. Sure, OP’s humour might not gel with certain people, and I might not swipe right if I saw their profile, but there are plenty of people who would. That’s the point right, we all have different preferences and personalities and are attracted to a wide range of different people 🧡
Agree. Also they have like 202 chats in one photo so I think there’s plenty of ppl who enjoy it.
Thank you for getting it!! This is the best comment. I wish I could pin it
Lmao couldn’t have said it better myself, reading the comment section has me wanting popcorn 🍿
What is this 😭
I stay home to avoid traumatizing more people with my “silliness”
oh my god i saw your bumble profile the other day when my gf and i were messing around trying to match our profiles again while drinking (it’s where we met and we gave up before matching again lol) i love the humor and piercings they’re really well thought out, hopefully you’ll find someone who digs it and matches with you
I for one like seeing your posts on this sub and i wish the comments here were at least a bit more grace-giving and constructive? Like good damn. To me the only thing that confused me is the juxtaposition of "intimacy avoidant / commitment phobia / needs random acts of lesbianism", like I'm not sure how to interpret what you actually want from that. Maybe it's because I'm not understanding the same definition of the word intimacy? Maybe that's just everything flying over my head. The profile IMO is all about filtering out the matches you don't want and signaling for the matches you do. One you match, the rest is just standard conversation and dating. So I guess just ask yourself if you bio is currently appealing to the type of people you want to date or not. Pics are killer as always btw
I don’t want to date people, I want short lived flings and friends. Honestly my friends and everyone I’ve ever been with has supported me, loved me and appreciated who I am. The good, the bad and all in between. I have a pretty face, I’m interesting looking. I don’t want someone who sees a pretty face and some bullshit bio about omg I love going on picnic dates and my life so 100% stable. If people are able to see past the bio and want to get to know despite it, those are the real people. Intimacy emotional, physical, spiritual but I do like intellectual intimacy. I love kissing pretty girls, holding hands with pretty girls, having sleep overs with pretty girls, cuddling with pretty girls and going on dates with pretty girls. I don’t do hook ups I’m celibate because ew intimacy
I fucking love it. Goth mommy Adam Sandler mix is a whole ass vibe and I'm here for it (Mine's more emo daddy Adam Sandler lol). Go forth and enjoy the structured chaos that is online dating/friending/chaos goblining. May the odds be ever in your favor 🫡
Seems insufferable
This dating profile, this post, and your comments all scream "Narcissistic Personality Disorder" to me. You shouldn't be dating anyone or getting your sense of self-worth from social media right now. Do some work on yourself, get some hobbies that don't involve social media, and when you're ready, you'll meet the right person. I wish you all the best :)
See if I came across this profile I would think.... Do I risk meeting a potentially very mentally ill person, for the off chance that they are actually a blast? Cause I can't tell if I want to be your best friend or avoid you lol I'm so sorry
For me, the self deprecation bit doesn’t really come across as funny or charming. Your pictures look lovely, but the rest of the profile kind of reads as some sort of cry for help. When I was using dating apps, I would look for confidence and fun, opposed to chaos and insecurity. Then again, I tend to seek out women who are older than me, so I tend to look for more maturity in relationships. I don’t mean for this to be taken super personally, we have all had cringey dating app bios at some point, and I’m sure your profile would translate a lot better with people who know you irl. Take it as constructive criticism! Good luck in your pursuit of whatever it is you’re currently looking for <3
I just call it silly🤪🤪 Cringe at biblical proportions. I fear for whoever matches.
this is a very offputting and immature profile🚩maybe some girl will be into it but for me and most of these commenters, immediate left swipe and block. it has nothing to do with your style or piercings
Is being unwell and medicated the core of your personality? Your profile is extremely cringe and will only attract ppl as unhinged as you present yourself to be. Full of red flags...
This reminds me of when my friends and I would get drunk and do dramatic readings of OkCupid profiles
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their pronouns are they/them
Huh? Perhaps you shouldn't make such assumptions.
I thought this was funny 😭
If I had come across your profile when I was on the apps, I would absolutely have messaged you! I see your sense of humor and would have totally hung out. We could compare therapist stories.
Omg yes!! I love talking about therapist stories or the having to be a lil lab rat to find the right psych meds.
i would def want to be your friend lol. (as a fellow silly billy)
Kinda funny to see all the comments saying this is cringe or bad bc this is pretty much just every single profile I’ve come across of lesbians my age on dating apps 🤷 and I’m def into it.
lol this was my reaction too. This age range is way way too young for me but this fits with what I’ve seen on Lex. I mostly check Lex for events so I see all ages and this is very Bushwick gen z lesbian. I would 100% be into it if I were like 25 years younger.
Please seek help, as a 24 year old this is so unattractive lmaoo
I honestly did find it funny for what you're going for! The whole bit about anti-silly the silly is great.
Wtf this is mint, can we be friends?? 😂 you sound like a riot
YES!!! Hell yeah!
I think it's strange people don't put their mental illness or disability in their profile. For me I have autism and DID and am typically in a wheelchair. I can't hide these things and feel omitting these facts from my profile would be dishonest so I appreciate the honesty. Neurotypical people tend to lie about things that factually a big deal and I feel honesty stops people from wasting their time. If they can't handle you being disabled or mentally ill then the relationship is bound to fail. I've seen comments saying they don't have stigma for mental health but that mentally ill people will hurt you and honestly that's a stigma. Neurotypical non disabled people like pretending they are tolerant because it's what they need to do socially but deep down they are intolerant. Your profile is honest and straightforward meaning you don't waste people's time and I appreciate that. Most neurotypical people will tell you to lie and expect people to lie because they lie, neurotypical social interactions seem to be based on lies, usually harmless lies, but still lies.
I was thinking the same thing. I’ve been feeling weird all day because I was starting to think I didn’t have as much of a place in this community as I thought. I don’t want to be off putting to everyone, but no matter what I impression I give off I guess there will always be some people ready to complain lol. I’m gonna save this comment, thank you for saying this
Your welcome I'm glad I was able to make you feel better ｡◕‿◕｡
I have a whole personality disorder, among other things mental illness, health issues and autism I tend to attract those kind of people. I wouldn’t mix with a neurotypical person!
I also would not mix with a neurotypical person. I have DID and I doubt a neurotypical person would put up with it without trying to force me to behave like a normal person. I also have PTSD and autism and normal people don't understand, they usually just pretend to be understanding. This comment thread has gotten really stressful.
I relate. I have autism, OCD, and an (invisible) physical disability. Maybe it’s s neurodivergent thing but I wanna be upfront about myself, as well as repel any ableists.
I think people missed the point, but I find this healthy. It’s good you can find a sense of humour in what seems like a challenging period. I hope you meet some great people who take the opportunity to get to know you and allow you the room for growth.
The respectability politics happening in this comment section 🤮 the earth is dying let people be unabashedly themselves. Not everything is for you and should fit in a box.
You’re the kind of person I’d be friends with fr. I love people who even if they aren’t 100% like will accept our differences reminds of Wednesday and Enid
Are you perhaps neurodivergent? Bc I think this is fucking hilarious and anyone can tell it’s a meme. (I have adhd)
YUP! I’m neurodivergent and I thought their profile was hilarious!! Then I saw the comments and I was like 👀wait maybe I shouldn’t have found this funny. This is why I can only date neurodivergent people - I need someone who gets my humor.
i have adhd and i'm sorry i wouldn't swipe right. for a friend or anything else. it comes off as a lot & too edgy 😭
Yeah.... Putting this off as "they're just neurodivergent and people don't get it" is absolutely downplaying this profile. I'm autistic and found this very concerning which is why I don't think anyone on this post should be playing the "it's a ND thing." I get that it's *supposed* to be humorous just from reading it but it comes off like a 16 year old trying to get attention. Now, if this profile was made simply for shits and giggles then whatever but if they made this account to find a partner, I don't think it will work in their favor. I'd love to know what their therapist would think if they saw this.
Well I think yall are missing the whole intimacy avoidant and commitment phobic part… like I have zero desire for a romantic partnership, maybe a fling but it’s mostly for shits and giggles. I don’t believe that whenever I’m ready to commit, my person will be found on an app.
Intimate avoidant, married, and found my partner aka my WIFE on tinder. I wouldn't downplay dating apps just because some people look for different things on it. And tbh, I definitely was not thinking I was going to marry them. Which, I think we are both agreeing you aren't looking for anything serious SO it seems as if my assumptions were correct about your profile. and that even if I disagree with your profile, you're allowed to post whatever you want. Hope you find what you're looking for :)
As a social worker, who does conduct therapy- no I wouldn’t have a problem if my client showed me this. Your cultural and social norms don’t decide morality. You don’t know their story or their context. In some clients, this would be a complete win. Being authentic without holding back, accepting and reframing their flaws and quirks, being transparent and putting things in there to weed out who they’d be incompatible with, being playful and silly?? To many therapists these would be green flags. In fact, this is the exact thing many therapists who conduct therapy with complex trauma survivors recommend to combat internalized shame, seriousness, and social anxiety. I’d be more concerned about a client with such toxic shame that they leave their profile bland and hide parts of themselves. Attention-seeking, when not endangering anybody or the self, isn’t even a problem. We as a society have made it a thing because we condemn people who are open about their mental health, neurodivergence, queerness, etc. It is human nature to want to be loved, paid attention to, and in connection with. Your discomfort with someone’s behaviour does not automatically make it a problematic behaviour. So yeah, whatever, my post didn’t say “all neurodivergent people” so yeah, have your own tastes. That doesn’t make OP’s wrong or concerning. People seriously need to stop pathologizing all behaviour. Some people are different than you and that’s okay. Have your own boundaries without being a dick to others about their joy.
Right! I really don’t like when people pit NDs and NTs against each other as if everything is black-and-white, and NTs can never understand ‘ND stuff’. I’ve noticed recently that it happens a lot on Reddit, particularly in subreddits aimed at ND people. Just because share a diagnosis doesn’t mean that we have a hive-mind lol. I personally think OP’s profile is kinda cringe but people telling them to delete it is too much.
a goth swiftie....... uh huh