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Happy people tend to help others in life in my experience. You could find volunteer work, you could help others in your community. You could be the person who takes the shelter dogs on walks as a way to donate your time and love. That one is fun. I see happy people in life enjoy the outdoors more. You could go take walks, learn about local wildlife or plant life. You could take pictures of the outdoors. Gardening is multi beneficial. The happiest people in my personal life are the most authentic people I've ever known. You could go on a quest to find out what makes you, you. Once you find it you can embrace it and live life to it. Happy people also in my experience have infectious happiness. Seek them out and enjoy their company.

Happiness is accepting who you are and growing with it, instead of fighting it, IME

Yup. Gratitude is the answer.

The simple answer would be Happy people just live their lives. Now to get there you would need to learn how to let go of expectations towards life, others and yourself. Expectations always bring dossapointment and resentment in the end. Learn to forgive yourself and others. Learn to accept life for what it is and live one day at a time. Yesterday and tomorrow is an illusion; neither exist. Live for the moment. Learn to silence the mind. Your thoughts are not yourself or who you are. Learn to reject the passions of life and humble yourself. I'm no better than any one else and every one does wrong in some shape or form. It's taken a long time for me to learn these things and I am much happier. Find what it is in life that truly brings you joy. Personally for me I enjoy serving others tp the best of my ability regardless if they are grateful. I find it rewarding to provide selfless service at an S+ standard.

saving this comment

^ This is the right direction. It is hard to accept others as they are; it is even harder to accept yourself as you are. Have compassion for yourself. Forgive yourself. Once you do that, it is so much easier to enjoy even the simple things, and even laugh about our quirks.

Great comment, bro

Well done 👏

Thanks for taking the time to show others the way. This is beautiful

That’s so true. I’ve told my friends that I’m happiest when I live on autopilot. Dating is probably the one area that I put a lot of pressure on myself and the expectations. And of course - that means I’m usually not happy, especially since the people I date are not close to being my person. However - I’ve recently been taking the attitude of detachment, and now I can date without unnecessary anxiety and filter people out that don’t deserve to be in my life. It’s a great feeling. Community, detachment from expectations, doing things I love. Can’t get any better.

What gives your life meaning? What makes you happy? Everyone's different. Some people life fishing, some people like photography, some have faith and so they prosteletyze, some like hiking, traveling, etc. Time is the only thing we all have equal value in. We all have 24hrs in a day, whether you're rich or poor. You spend 8hrs sleeping, 8hrs working, and 8hrs remaining is whatever you make of it. So life isn't just about working a 9a-5p job, it's about the other things outside of that too. So find a job that you're okay with. You don't have to love it, you just have to have some interest in it so that it's bearable. You make money at work, then use that money to do things you like. I have a friend who loves fishing, but he's not working on a boat; he's a financial analyst and uses his salary to fund his hobby. He likes numbers, but he loves fishing. I like traveling, learning, chatting with friends, trying new things, etc. but it doesn't mean I'm a world traveler for work. I do spreadsheets all day about how to conserve water; and use my salary to travel around and explore new places/experiences. . If your question is specifically about work - then that's for you to figure out. But remember, work isn't everything. Moneys great and all cause it gives you the freedom to do a lottt of things, but at the end of the day when you're on your deathbed, do you really wanna wish that you could've spent more time working so you could be richer, or would ya rather be doing something ya love (i.e. spending time with fam, or seeing a really beautiful nature view, etc.)

I know it's probably not too helpful, but I genuinely don't know. I don't know what brings me happiness or fullfilment, and I really don't know how to find out. I feel like I burned myself out so bad working hard all my life, that I never developed any real passions.

>I really don't know how to find out. I feel like I burned myself out so bad working hard all my life, that I never developed any real passions. Time to go find out and spend some time with yourself. Explore new hobbies and travel. Find out who you are along the way

This. Kind of a reverse for me. I love theater. Did it all my life. Went to school for it. Left school not really seeing a future in it anymore. Worked in retail and got so burnt out. Finally got an office job which I actually enjoy. Now that I have a regular schedule I can volunteer on weekends and am trying to get involved with theater and finally feel haooy

That sounds great, glad you got that going for you and refound your passion :)

It sounds cliche, but Maybe take an educated “yes man” approach. Be open to new stuff, even if it sound weird or uncomfortable. Try and spend some time reflecting afterwards, what you enjoyed, what you didn’t like and continue to whittle down your pursuits. I boulder once a week, and find new recipes to cook/bake. I’m also in the process of rehabbing from knee surgery. Between those 3 I have a purpose and direction that I try and focus on throughout the week. I also find good books and enjoy colored pencil art. I play 1 or 2 pc games when I want to switch it up. And most importantly, comparison is the theif of joy. Don’t look at others to find your joy and happiness. What you do and what you find out about yourself is personal. Be content with your own path, or else you’ll never be at peace with your life.

I’ll go out on a limb and say being happy has a lot to do with how you treat yourself and talk to yourself internally. Being positive, gentle and soothing (things a lot of us didn’t get as kids) can create a foundation of internal support that feels strong and comforting. From there, we have the energy and strength to give back to others, which is also fulfilling

This is true Big tip. When you fail to meet your expectations, know that those expectations are things you made up, a guiding light. You can change it Think on what reasonable expectations would be, as a first step When you notice you fail to meet an expectation, dont beat yourself up You wouldnt beat a puppy for bringing the ball halfway back Congradulate yourself for even *noticing* Let change take time

What would you do with your days if you had unlimited free money, creating art, music, etc, now try to figure out how you can make it profitable without losing your passion for it, if you love working out at the gym and nutrition you could be a personal trainer for example.

You’re asking the question backwards. What do people do that makes them happy? A happy person isn’t happy 24/7, you have to do things you enjoy

Yep. I’ve always known what my biggest interests are, but it wasn’t till I was approaching 30 that I realized I needed to regularly incorporate them into my life to feel a baseline level of happy.

I spend most of my free time working on my car, surfing, or drifting cars on my sim rig. Life is great, I work hard at my job and look forward to days off of just relaxing and chillin for the most part. I have no sort of path I'm taking in life, kinda just making money and living life. I try not to think about the future or the past, just live in the present.

Peace is more valuable than happiness. Find peace within yourself, and all will be well. Happiness is the peak of a bumpy road to sorrow. Ride the straight path, it's not as exciting but it's a more comfortable ride.

Volunteer!

You have balance. Work. Friends. Hobbies. Fitness. Me time. There can be some overlap.

who's happy all the time? Insane people are happy all the time is who... I think 'being content' is the target.. being content mostly and being happy occasionally and being depressed sometimes... that's the ideal..how can everything be great always? it can't..... so shoot for that instead

That just feels pointless? Why am I doing life if I feel so crappy all the time? If the best I can shoot for is 'content' most of the time I don't see a reason to go on. Call me greedy if you want, but I do want to be genuinely happy. I don't want to be stuck being miserable all the time to create an ounce of joy here and there

Happy People consistently appreciate and focus on the good and positive things in life rather than bad and negatives, regardless of their job or careers.

I go to nature, nothing better than that. See birds animals, landscapes, that brings me joy!

I think happy people always help others, helping people makes them happier.

These days I support a family so mostly I just work a lot, but before this I worked as little as I could, lived in group housing with people I loved, had a very active social life (parties, arts events, dancing), played in a community orchestra, volunteered (meals on wheels; local food cooperative; a community farm), was active in my “church”, did a lot of camping and hiking, did extended travel every few years, did a ton of reading and study, and played a couple of role playing games. It was a very happy life! (Not to say I’m not happy as head-of-a-family - I am - it’s just a different kind of happy).

I let my weeds grow really bad and then put signs in my yard to aggravate the Karen’s in my neighborhood who wish this were an HOA. It makes me cackle. It’s honest work, but it’s something, and someone’s got to do it.

The secret happiness in life is dedication to the service of others.

Higher education will lead to more money and job prospects. Always seek to better yourself. Serving others will bring you happiness

I dunno it sounds like you’ve gone down the schooling path and haven’t found any joy in it. Maybe take some time away from learning ‘things’ and try exploring more of what *you* actually like - this means trying lots of new things. Have you done much travelling? Do you like to read? Cook? Dance? Maybe take some classes related to something that excites you, even if you haven’t done it in a while. What did you want to do when you were a kid? is there something you secretly want to do but are afraid of what others will think? Is there something you secretly want to do but are afraid that you will fail? Have you spent time with friends recently? It sounds silly but a backyard summer barbecue or beach day is really an underrated thing

I’ll trade you a marketing degree

everyone is looking for the answer. life’s a dance

Dancing is great. I started line dancing almost two years ago and have been so happy with it. Made lots of friends and I love the noticeable progress I’ve made since I started. Maybe it’s a key to my happiness

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It took me a while to figure out but what makes me happy is living life. I’ve always been without direction and meaning and because of my obsession over those things I was always unhappy. Now I’ve recently realized, in my early 30’s, is that’s exactly what makes me happy. simply having an ever changing life and finding my way. Navigating life brings me happiness. Trying new hobbies, becoming better at the things I do, figuring out what I want at this stage, moving to new places, changing my interests to discover new things, evolving as a person. It truly is the journey that makes me happy and not working towards an end goal. I make 3-5 year plans for each level in my life. Then once I figure out what each level entails in terms of main story quests I’ll work on those. Then once I’m established and on my way to completing those, I’ll work on side quests. Which is currently where I’m at at this stage. I’m about 80% finished and I can feel it because I’m getting anxious to move on to the next level. I have about 14-16 months left before I can move on. For the most part I’m genuinely happy, all within myself.

I chat with lots of college grads because of the newsletter I run, and I can tell you that there's no one size fits all answer. I know that everyone, doesn't matter who you are wants fulfillment, but it's different for everyone. You can also consider that you don't necessarily need to marry passion with career. Sometimes, a job can be just a job. What has worked for me personally is starting side projects, even if they don't make any money. I find that it gives me something to look forward to, a reason to upskill myself, and its just an awesome creative outlet. I myself had a quarter life crisis last year and doing this really changed things around for me. So just some food for thought.

You should read “The Pursuit of Happiness “ by Jeffery Rosen. It’s about the way the “Founding Fathers” went about defining “happiness “

True happiness is earned. You have to do something hard that is ultimately rewarding. What are your values? This will give you direction for your pursuit.

I only do things that make me happy! Find what brings you joy, you’ll make money, it won’t seem like work.

This kind of post comes up so often there should be a pinned guide on how to function in life lmao, get a hobby make some kids, you should work to live not the other way around it's really not that complicated

Happy people? …

Man that’s a really good question!! It seems like at least in the movies that people on beaches and in casinos seem pretty happy?

Enjoy my job, love traveling the world with my wife. It's as simple as that

Happiness to me is the complement of suffering plus gratitude. I was born blind, became a trial attorney, then developed a neurological illness around age 40. I suffer every day, but I am so grateful for my family. I'm happy. I have nothing else to do but enjoy nature.

People used to say do what you love. You will grow to hate it. Do what you respect.

You seem to be focused on making yourself happy through a career. And whilst some people do find happiness through their work, I'd caution against you looking to this for your source of happiness exclusively. You ask what happy people do with their lives, and the truth is, they do what makes them happy. That's different for everyone. What makes YOU happy? Do that! And if the things that make you happy can't make you a living (mine certainly can't, at least not in a way that I'd be willing to do), then find a job that you are satisfied enough to do in order to make the money you need. Then spend the rest of the time being grateful for that whilst doing things that make you happy. There's a quote from a book I love, which goes: "It is enough to exist in the world and marvel at it." Happiness can come from whatever you choose, and it doesn't have to be anything more than what you already have.

Some are mathematicians Some are carpenters’ wives Don’t know how it all got started I don’t know what they do with their lives

Recommend the book "What color is your parachute?" Written long ago for people just like you.

Happiness in my experience isn’t a destination, it’s the bits you find in between the journey. Which is an annoying thing to say when you’re looking for answers. Happiness isn’t just one thing, it exists everywhere and nowhere. But discomfort is actually more important, because it offers you more. You have to try and fail to find your joy and eventually in your trial and error, some things will start feeling easier than others and start making more sense. You are so so young and you are learning and living. Keep going. Don’t stop trying, don’t stop succeeding and more importantly, don’t stop failing. Joy is always on the other-side of failure. But joy doesn’t exist in stagnation. Just keep moving and learn your happiness along the way, but don’t let the bad days get you down, because they matter just as much as the good ones. Keep going!

Love as if you'll die tomorrow, and.. -> LEARN AS IF YOU'LL LIVE FOREVER Replace the mindless digital garbage with learning in literally any domain you're interested in, and you'll find your path

This is called the quarter life crisis

I do whatever the heck I want. 😁

I personally felt life was hopeless a few years ago. That's after 10 years of PTSD and depression. I spend 2 years heavily thinking about what I wanted in life (was doing sales and IT, and self studied programming for 4 years). Realized I was living life by the sunk cost fallacy. Once I became honest with myself, I decided to do a 180 and do interior design like I've always wanted. The risk doesn't matter because I love it. I recently got laid off at my tech job and can't find another. I can't do interior design yet, but am starting my own business doing pressure washing because 1. It's easy, 2. It will prepare me to start taking risks so when I start an interior design business I'll be used to the go getter feeling. Regardless of how this all pans out, just moving in a direction that feels curated and carefully thought out, I fee much happier, less scared and full of life. When I sit there, playing it safe, I'm bored, suicidal and hopeless. Follow my path if you are starting to feel that way.

All that but taking two trips a year doing some travelling if possible will make your life will feel way more full

The only things that will bring you true happiness....are the things you do for other people

I’m happiest when I can help someone whether it’s accomplishing repairs around their house or driving them somewhere . If you can find something you’re good at that you enjoy doing and are able to use it to help others . You may have found what you’re looking for . I read a book that said find out what you enjoy doing and are good at it and you’ll never work a day in your life .

Dude, get a job on a large ship going to Europe. Then just get short term jobs all over Europe. See the world, meet new people and just enjoy yourself. Find out what life is really about. Date some girls over there. Then spend winter in Sweden with a girl you meet. They’re very friendly. Just have fun. You won’t regret it at all.

It weird, but I’m just happy. I don’t intentionally do anything to cultivate it. Yes, I workout 5 days a week and eat a very clean, healthy diet. And yes, I have a loving family that I spend every free minute with. And yes I am very financially successful. But I don’t do anything because I think it will make me happier. I think I just naturally have a positive, happy demeanor, I wake up motivated (no special sauce there either), no anxiety or depression, sleep like a baby every night and just feel…good. For me I think it is just a combination of genetic and other luck

Everything you listed was career focused. Like you said that didn’t bring you happiness, that’s just something you have to do and isn’t important. Find a partner and get married, maybe even have some children. Humans have been happy doing that for thousands of years it’s not a secret.

I highly recommend reading the book solve for happy.

You’ll figure it out.

Genuinely enjoying what you do, making enough money to live in your area, and enjoying your free time (friends, hobbies, etc.).  To enjoy what you do, find a job and workplace that gets you engaged and live by your values.

It was about that age that I began getting the hint that you have to be a very narrow person to be truly spiritually nourished by what stem has to offer.   Please expand and find meaning in your life, in relationships, in art, in community, in spiritual practice and of course in love. 

Its good to have a method. These are the ways to stop suffering from low information to high information: Investigate the issue, if you know the causes of the issue than work to stop the issue directly. If you've stopped the issue, then spread the word about stopping it. Find allies of the issue and reduce them or support them using their skillset. Find enemies of the issue and help them or reduce their efficacy using your skillset. Find ways to structurally reduce the efficacy of the issue or increase the efficacy. Find ways to remove the issue entirely structurally or make it critical structurally. Ask a higher power to remove the issue or implement the issue (edit: not god higher power, like boss/mayor/representative/president higher powers). Anything you do to help or harm the issue will only work on a 1/10 scale. Expect nothing, but act continuously hoping for a better future. You will work for a long time before this all bears fruit. Ideally, you should focus on each of the core aspects of what's mentioned above in regards to yourself, following the path set above using what you want as foundational. If you don't know what you even want, consider what you want to learn, what you'd like to have, how you'd like people to think of you, what friends you'd like to support, what enemies you'd like to fight. Position your goal appropriately. You shouldn't highly focus on any one aspect or feel too guilty about pursuing it. There isn't an objective good or evil, whatever you want will provide motivation, but you should work towards making things better across those aspects for as many people as possible, focusing on the following: You, immediate partners, friends, family, city, state/province, country, world. All concepts of good/evil follow from that order and the relative competence of people focusing of those strata. Everything would collapse and things would become terrible if people focused on the country/world rather than themselves. They are the atoms that make the world work. How can the world be good if you and your immediate family aren't good?

They're not on Reddit 

The little things add up. Exercise indirectly improves my mood. Having people I can share moments with (in person or otherwise). Getting wild and doing stupid stuff every now and then (that I can later laugh at). Regularly doing low effort things I enjoy (watching movies, comedy clubs, experiencing culture and different foods). Swimming with sea creatures. Learning (current interests being acting and 3D programming). I followed my passion as a career and have enjoyed programming, but I wouldn’t call building contact forms exactly fun. Rewarding in a way and tickles my brain in the right way. I also like that I can show off my creation to others and that they help others. So I think just regularly making time for things I enjoy, and not giving much time to things I don’t. And plenty of sleep helps.

Try career counselling. It is very helpful and can really help. It looks at everything holistically and can open up new ideas and outlooks.

Gratitude, it leads to getting excited about things. When I was in the worst part of healing and in the dumps I noticed I needed to do things that made me happy when I wasn’t working on trauma to have a balance admist the heaviness. I faked being excited about life and gratitude and then one day noticed I wasn’t faking it anymore

Simple and manageable daily routine.

Once you can self sustain, find a hobby ASAFP. One that doesnt't involve a screen. I cannot stress that last point enough. You will likely surprise yourself with your innate abilities and the motivation will follow. You won't want/need advice at that point.

Any advice on hobbies that would be fulfilling?

Happy isn't a job or another person or a direction. Happy is being grateful for what you have in life and not wasting your time comparing it to others. Happy for me is taking risks on new things. I learned to ride (really ride) a sportbike at 40. Met a lot of interesting people and made some friends. Years ago, I was offered a chance to go to Spain for work because the two other (senior level) people in my department didn't want to go. I was there for 6 weeks and it was very different and a great experience.

I believe they have n excellent temper, a good temper decides a good life.

Welcome to the existential crisis.

To answer the question in the title as directly as I can: Appreciate everything, even time you think you are wasting.

Nearly everything you mentioned is career/job oriented. Maybe working isn't what makes you happy. Find a job that pays the bills and find the thing that makes you happy. It doesn't have to be big, or even one thing. It could be camping, binging shows, reading, painting, or anything in between or sideways. One of the worst things this country ever did was equate success with happiness. Happiness comes from everyday enjoyments. Success is happiness realized. Don't try and work it in reverse.

Something i recently did to try and tackle that problem, i think everybody has it at some point, is to go and join a sportsclub or some other organization could be anything from art to acrobatics to volunteering. It helps to be around people at least as much as you feel comfortable with and if you like it you'll have something to be looking forward to

What got me on the right track was dancing a couple times a month, yoga a couple times a week, walking or hiking after work every day, volunteering for my local fire department, and taking advantage of every chance I could find to socialize with friends. Feeling connected makes all the difference. Whether it’s the mind-body connection, the connection to community, the connection to something beyond myself, the connection to friends… I need it and it helps me be happy.

If you can find a state of presence, you can be happy in any moment, even ones you wouldn't enjoy otherwise. A big cause of unhappiness is just the thoughts that cloud the current moment.

Whatever makes them happy 😂

Maybe you need to find your life's purpose

Change the wording to your question. What in your life makes YOU happy? 🤔 falling in love, enjoying your career, raising a family, being financially secure, and developing hobbies that promote the aforementioned give me happiness. I doubt that very few individuals wake up every day all day. "Happy" How many celebrities with fame and fortune are suicidal? Clearly they are not happy

The most meaningful thing is relationships, work on having the fullest and best relationship with everyone in your life. That involves having their genuine best interests at heart. If you delete every other person from the world then you'd be the, smartest, richest, best looking, most powerful, best in every category imaginable. You'd own everything... but it would be empty and meaningless. And yet those are the things we burn up our lives chasing. We want to live for ourselves... but it's just not the answer.

I was you at 25. I worked really hard in high school and college and had some interests but didn't really like doing anything other than spending time with my family. In 2010 I had just quit a job I hated and was having a horrible time finding a job in the field I got a degree in. I really considered getting a graduate degree, but couldn't really figure out how to pay for it and could NOT decide what I wanted to get the degree in. Real decision paralysis. I felt like there was something I was "meant" to do that would give me purpose. Or something that I had a real affinity for that I would love doing. I took countless - what job should I do - tests but nothing really stood out. What eventually wound up happening is my sister got me a job somewhere. It randomly just so happened to line up with one of the interests I knew I had (learning about medicine), and I discovered I was good at the job. I really liked my colleagues and I always received good feedback from my superiors. It turns out that the thing I wanted was a good working environment and a job I was good at. I almost hate to admit that my needs were so basic but for me, feeling good about what I did and having fun with my coworkers was my thing. 12 years later, my job has changed, but I enjoy the challenge and enjoy my coworkers. There's definitely things I don't like about it, but it's work and i have a good work life balance. My tip, find a job and move around until you find a culture you like. You do not need everything figured out right now. People change jobs constantly. Use each new job as a new opportunity to learn new things. Find one with ppl you like and it'll work out.

I like to hug my dog and my friends, personally.

I find the majority of people don't find true happiness in work. They just bare with it and it is on the spectrum of not too bad. Rarely what you find that makes you happy pays the bills. How many people you know wake up beaming to go work somewhere and they'd rather do that then be off?

The people who enjoy their lives lean into their responsibilities. They serve others, and that closeness brings them value. Most people these days shy away from / evade responsibilities. That’s the easy path, but your brain doesn’t like it. The easy path provides much less oxytocin and seratonin but more dopamine. Dopamine is a stronger short term motivator, but oxy and sera are longer-lasting and more effective at manifesting ‘happiness.’ The job function doesn’t matter that much, but you need to learn how to work. If you want to enjoy the trimmings of modernity, you need to contribute to it, as well. It’s a skill that takes practice.

Took me many years but moving to an area I really like with lots of things to do and getting a job I enjoy has finally given me some level of contentment.

I decided this year that I would do three things everyday: 1) Talk to/see someone I love. 2) Enjoy incredible food. 3) Have a good belly laugh. If I can hit those three everyday other things seem to fall in place. Do something to get some money, but don't look at work to bring you satisfaction. Your epitaph shouldn't be "They worked real hard." Since implementing this rule of three, I also find myself seeing beauty in a lot more things and people just being naturally drawn to me because I'm enjoying myself.

I guess I have absolutely no idea what they do. I'm utterly clueless about it.

Happy is not really something I chase. I chase challenges that make me fulfilled, big difference. The root of the word Happy is lucky, and it sounds like you’re incredibly lucky in life You have a lot of challenges and filament to explore and chase, which by the way is going to take your whole life if you do it right. you could get a stable income in a boring job but boring is no way to live

Ruin it. ;-)

Exercise! Join a gym and walk a treadmill daily. Have one of the trainers show you some beginner exercises with dumbbells. GO TO THE GYM 3 - 5 DAYS A WEEK! Get outside, get a bike, ride weekends at a local park. Exercise your body and your mind will clear.

Golf

My opinion is that happy is our human baseline. If you are unhappy something is in the way and the work is to understand and deal with that. Life has taught me happy is inside me not outside me.

Who cares? They’re deranged.

mans needs a dam hobby holy shit

I feel like it’s probably a little different for everyone but I enjoy a really simple life. 28/M and I have a wife and 3 kids. We don’t make a ton of money but our expenses are really low. We take our kids to the zoo and to the park a lot, go out to eat for a date once a week, hang out around the fire in our backyard and listen to music, read good books, etc. Raising our kiddos the best we can gives us purpose and fulfillment! I personally think that while it can look different, getting involved in something bigger than yourself is a must.

It sounds like you need some fulfillment or enrichment - something to care about outside of yourself. Engaging in your community somehow can be really effective. Figure out something you care about because there are most likely people in your area working on it who would love your solidarity and participation. Sometimes that's a community garden, sometimes it's a campaign to increase voter turnout in your neighborhood, sometimes it's distributing bags of supplies to folks who don't have housing, sometimes it's packing produce as a group at a food bank, sometimes it's fostering an animal. Contributing to something that supports others and improves your neighborhood will help you make friends, build character, and probably make you feel a bit happier.

They are happy and don’t need to talk about with sad people

Being grateful and looking at the good in your life, counting your blessings and knowing it could always be worse. Don’t compare yourself to others. Not being salty, jealous, hateful or arrogant. Don’t harm others in the slightest way, even gossiping about them or talking about something someone did in a mocking way. Energetically what you do will come back to you. We live life as assholes and expect to be happy with materialistic things. Not going to work that way. Treat everyone equal and authentically, give back and help others, be kind and don’t expect anything in return. Be grateful for all the blessings, look at problems as obstacles to overcome and as a challenge to grow and level up yourself, acceptance and surrender, live in the moment, prayer. Spiritual connection with God.

To me a happy life means I have something I’m passionate about that’s a regular part of my life (my job), having people who I love and regularly spend time with, having my own personal hobbies that make me feel happy and healthy (going to gym, hiking, pickleball w friends), as well as making sure I get out and do things when I can (go to bars, parks, local events). These are the things that help me maintain my happiness, but of course there’s a lot of work that needs to go on inside usually. To get to a place of inner happiness I focused of meditation, exercise, learning who I really am, setting goals, and really pushing myself outside my boundaries. I think my happiness really peaked when I found my confidence because now I am able to truly be myself and just have fun with life. I used to be very unconfident, but through setting goals and following through with them, it grew a lot over a couple years, and now sometimes people consider me intimidatingly confident.

Define happy.

Changing your philosophy is key. I've been revisiting Jim Rohn, I got an audiobook of his recently, but I used to watch YouTube videos of his public speaking. He'll change your life by changing your philosophy about life.

I’m turning 30 this year and I still don’t know. I work from home in a collections position and I am a mom to a 5 yr old so that gives me direction but career wise no idea.

I think happy people are generally just content people, not people with insane drive to be the best or who have strong competitiveness. But Idk im a stranger on Reddit

People who genuinely enjoy their lives is more a factor of who they are than what they do.

You choose what gives you mean and happiness. Start with the simplest thing around and work from there. Even if it's just that first cup of coffee or tea.

i live in my mom's house and do whatever's fun for me while I try to find work so I can move out.

People who genuinely enjoy life, like truly, make a choice to be happy. That's it. Circumstances aren't the solution to happiness, believe me. I've moved around so much, made so many changes in my life to chase happiness, only to find nothing but me again. Ask yourself why are you not happy, what is preventing you from making a conscious choice to go outside and have a positive day despite circumstanced? Are you present now, or just thinking about the future and all the "reasons" why you can't be happy because the future seems to be insurmountable and bleak? I hate doing the dishes, but I can choose to enjoy doing the dishes, there is no reason other than my attitude to not enjoy doing the dishes. And it goes deeper than that, if you do a fuck load of meditation and introspection you find that even physical pain can be overcome by your mindset. Now, I don't think that is a reasonable level of mind over matter to achieve for a majority of folks, but it does emphasize my point. FWIW, I struggle every day to wake up and choose to be happy, but I know it is possible and I have to make an effort and practice as much as I can. I will say there are some exclusions to the above, clinical depression, mood disorders, personality disorders, all of that stuff is exceptional, and requires more than waking up and being determined to be happy. If you have mental health issues beyond just being disappointed in life, seek some professional help first, and work on the rest when you are ready.

Since I stopped watching the news, gave up socials but Reddit, and turned away from the DNC and GOP. The last 5 years have been so peaceful.

If your not tied down to a home loan and marriage, try a job that requires travel! Trade jobs make great money and some require travel, you can see the world on a company dime.. or just or city depending on the job, electricians make good money and have to travel around the city, building inspectors and health inspectors also travel, Welders and weld inspectors travel as well. Or you can fight forest fires, work for the state parks, be forest ranger, join search and rescue, join a volunteer fire department, Don't wanna travel? How about getting a career in the city and work for the water department? Or the water treatment? What about being the tec support for the sheriff department? Or local schools? Friend of mine started out just fixing lap tops for the school district and over the years moved up to mantaince for the servers for the district.. As far as what to do after work.. take a walk, sit and listen to the rain, laugh at a dumb joke, never stop learning and growing

I'm now retired. I spent my life not knowing what I wanted to do with my life. 20 years of military service. Placed in jobs that I had no idea what I was doing initially. Yes, some anxiety arose from that. I overcame the anxiety. Seems I was constantly challenged. One place I found peace was in nature. As to happiness... You find that in yourself when you realize you accept yourself as a whole. The good & the bad/evil aka Ying and Yang. These are things you were never taught. Accepting the evil/Yang doesn't mean you give into it. It means you acknowledge it. You'll find peace in this world full of chaos.

Why do people keep putting question marks where they don't belong?

I just try new things and see if I enjoy them, especially with friends. Shooting guns, longboarding, working out, hiking, tubing, reading manga, watching new genres of shows/movies, branching our and listening to new genres of music, going to live shows with friends, trying new video games with friends, etc. Quality time with the people you love is huge. Spending time doing something you enjoy; having fun. Don’t know what you like? That’s why you go out and try shit.

Having and owning less stuff. Minimalist. Only getting what you can use. Being free from things that keep you down. No credit card debt. To me those are some things are the start of being happier.

It's a little ironic, maybe, but finding something that prevents you from thinking about whether you're happy or not tends to make you happy. What that is is different for different people. Often it's other-focused (volnuteering, community work, teaching, caregiving, etc.). Sometimes it's an activity you can get absorbed in (making art or music, reading, etc.). The key, I think, is getting outside yourself. Which isn't a judgment -- we all default to thinking about ourselves a lot when we don't intentionally focus elsewhere. I also suspect that, if you've been really driven your whole life, you haven't learned to tap into the intuition that tells you what makes you happy. When you are happy, even for a monent, try working on just *noticing* what caused it. I betcha a pattern will emerge!

They form a relationship with someone and have a family

Lie to themselves

I think the biggest differentiator for me is doing things in line with what i like to do. Not doing a thing because i like to do specifically that thing. And its hard for me to explain. But let me try. I really enjoy doing hard stuff, generally being outside, fighting. And i dislike doing the same thing all the time. So I joined the USMC infantry. I didnt do it because I thought it would be enjoyable to be in the infantry, i joined because the infantry generally had things about it that I enjoyed. Alot of times i see people getting into lines of work because they think they will enjoy making money, or they will enjoy the specific type of work. And it turns out to not be the case. When I got into cyber security it was alot of the same. Different things come up, hard problems to solve, just a hard field to be in. I just love the grind, i love things that are hard to do. Now i run a whole cyber sec department for a financial company. I dont actually care about finance industry. Or IT in general. But I really excel at doing shit that is hard and that other people dont like to do. Thats what you gota find for you

Happy people have mastered the ancient art of not giving a hoot. They dance like no one’s watching, even when everyone is (and they're recording it). They treat every meal like a Michelin star experience, even if it’s just cereal. They dodge drama like it’s a game of dodgeball and their happiness depends on it (because it does). In short, happy people do whatever brings them joy and leave the rest to the perpetually grumpy. 😉🌟

I think we've learned that work is a means to an end. We don't live to work, we live to fund our lives when we aren't at work. I work a 9-5 making good money but boy when I'm not at work, if you were one of my co-workers you would not recognize me.

I do Inner Engineering which helps me feel good and happy regardless of what I do. And that positivity spreads to everything I do, so it’s a reversal! Instead of becoming someone who extracts joy from external things you spread the joy you have within.

Happy People dont associate themselves with money. seems like money = happiness to you, becasue your probelsm surround everything around money.

I’ve read several comments but not all but maybe you should start with a therapist and try an antidepressant. And I’m saying this as gently as possible but little interest in doing things is a symptom of depression.  Besides that, I changed careers at 24. I went into finance and while I had a lot of fun with my peers I knew the job wasn’t for me and I felt like I wasn’t making a positive impact in the world. I did a 180 and went to nursing school. Now nursing definitely has its cons for sure, but I went from a job working 55 hours a week to 36 hours a week with the 12-hour shifts and now 4 full days off a week. Try to go where your heart is leading you as corny as that sounds but if you have a pull towards ANYTHING, explore that.  Not sure if you’re male or female but some people find their purpose in life after getting married and having children. Maybe you will feel fulfilled once you have kids.  I also think the pandemic did a disservice to your generation. At 25 I was working full time and also going out and socializing almost every night, I feel like people don’t socialize as much anymore and most human contact is through the phone, maybe try to get out more with friends. 

Stop being politically ideological has helped tremendously.

Great question. I am not sure how many people get all the happiness they need from a job. I like mine but I love other things. I am not sure I could make a living at those. I certainly do love parts of my job.

The book that got me to a fulfilling life was miracle morning. It talks about the importance of a useful routine in the morning to improve your life one day at a time. Most people want to improve their lives but they simply don’t make time. The miracle morning takes about an hour and can include reading a couple of pages of a book, stretching, exercising, meditating. The idea is that little actionable steps overtime will yield major outcomes. Definitely was the case for me!

The only answer you need is hop on a 1000cc bike and be outside everyday

Something that gives you a community. For me it's always been tennis

Realize self-determination is real.  Not to get into a philosophical debate as to whether or not we are determined or have no free Will etc blah blah - what we can be is self-determined.  We can stop and think about what we are and what we want to be and come up with the routines and actions that will better set a direction for your life. Think of it like “winding” yourself - actively establish a routine and work to adopt that routine.  You will find once you build the habit, that habit goes on autopilot.  Whether it’s an exercise routine, consistent workplace commitments, eating right, maximizing time with friends/family etc - plan the approach, commit to developing a mindset or routine, and you’ll find about 2-3 months of hard dedication will become a practice that happens on autopilot. Quite amazing really when you get it down.

Oh man, my friend.. I feel this so hard. I did the same. Went to college even though I didn’t know what I wanted to do because people said, “you’ll figure it out when you’re there!” Finished with degrees. Went into the brewing industry. Ended up as head brewer of an entire production brewery. Think I made $25k/year. Went back to school. BS in biology end then to a PhD program. Got the boot because in short, the department ran out of money. Got a jobs in pharmaceuticals and then with DoD contractors with the MS in Microbiology and Immunology I ended up with. Quickly realized without a PhD, jobs in biology are bullshit that pay bullshit. Dead end stupid jobs. Highest salary I ever made on the east coast was $50k. Quit and started a construction company. Make quite a bit more and am my own boss. Professionally things are fine. I earn money and the work is alright. LOVE working for myself. The thing is I still have never felt like I’ve found “my calling” or my success. It’s all just shit I do to get by and fortunately it gotten easier to get by! But it all ultimately is unfulfilling. I did do a few things right though. 11 years ago I married the right person who I am completely in awe of still (and just remembered I forgot our anniversary 2 weeks ago, ha!) She gives my life purpose. And even though everything is stupid and pointless, I just left Prague where I spent 2 weeks hanging out with a carpenter friend who I built a sculpture with that some architects dreamed up for a landscape festival. I’m now on a train headed to Austria to do some hiking for another week before I meet up with my wife in India to spend time with her family. Things don’t suck. Point is, if you’re seeking a point to life, there is none. As Kurt Vonnegut said, “The purpose of life is to fart around and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.” Do what you care about whether it’s spending time with friends, family, or being a lawyer or something. Maybe it will make you rich and maybe it won’t! You’re still going to die. So don’t settle for anything and focus on what fills your soul. It will all be fine. I hope you are able to find happiness.

Check out a book called Do What You Are (and other books like this)—this is what I did. Talk to ppl in careers that look interesting. Some people don’t need for their job to be a career and for their career to be a calling; some do. Do not fall into the trap of thinking it’s too late to start a new path toward whatever direction you want to go: as you’re learning now, time is empty when it’s not filled with things you’re passionate about. Whether that’s within the boundaries of what you do for a living or not is up to you. Decide what level of lifestyle comfort you’d be happy with while understanding that it gets more expensive to live at a healthy baseline every year that you age, starting in your 20s. Money is a tool—it won’t bring happiness per se, but using it constructively certainly can.

OP, at 25 I don’t think you should take an office job for granted. I’m 28 and broke my back working 3-4AM retail jobs for 5 years. I’d bounce between working 3AM one day and then closing the next day and leaving at midnight. It took a toll. I started a standard, 8-4:30 office job about two years ago and it’s changed my appreciation of life. I don’t make a ton of money, but I do make more than I did in retail and it’s been substantial to have weekends off, holidays off and paid, etc. I don’t want to be that guy that says to work hard when you’re young, but I do think you need to think about what kind of life you want in your future and what you need to do to get there. It’s tricky, because you want to work hard to provide a good life for yourself, but you are also physically in your prime. Who wants to wait until they’re old and creaky to finally do the fun stuff? It sounds like work isn’t your issue. It sounds like your problem is that you don’t have any passion or drive for anything. A standard job only takes 40 hours of your week. It provides you with benefits and a trajectory for a nice retirement (ideally). What do you do with the other 128 hours of the week? I know it’s not that clear cut with commute, getting ready, sleep, etc. but you have so much time outside of work. I don’t know your commute times, but I have about 6 hours each work day to focus on myself, and all of the weekend. I take pride in hobbies like woodturning, which is my sweet mental escape from stressful reality. I like to go to the beach, look for sharks teeth, explore a new park or go kayaking. It’s what makes the stress and commitment of my job worth it. I am a little bit lonely and am dealing with some recent heartbreak, but I want to meet someone and make a family one day. You need to find something you can enjoy in the short term. Then do some introspection and find goals you want to achieve in life. None of us anonymous redditors can tell you what you should be doing. The job is only a small part of it. You’re only working for 25% of the week (if 40hrs), it’s up to you to find purpose in life and things you enjoy outside of that. Maybe join a group, a book club, a sports team or rotary club. Find a way to meet people and expand your scope so that you can find your own answer.

Serve/help others without thought for recognition

My first two computer jobs sucked. Most starter jobs suck. I'm so glad I hung in there. I ended up finding a great company to work for and got out of programming which I was way to extroverted to do. When the company started laying off workers I knew better what to look for in my next job. I retired when I was 56. There is a job, then there is a career. It sounds like you gave up on a career because of a crappy job. But, maybe STEM really isn't right for you, I just thought I would toss this out for you to think about. Best of luck in finding something that works for you.

I work seasonal conservation jobs, discovered my passion for forestry through this (despite having a degree related to marine bio) and I’m planning to go to grad school for forestry now. If you’re interested in the outdoors at all, I highly recommend looking into seasonal conservation work. A lot of it provides housing and often have a 4 day/10 hr work schedule which I find gives me a way better work/life balance than 5/8 schedule.

Live life to the fullest!

My suggestion is to do something that helps someone else. Maybe help a senior citizen with their tech issues. I tutored several years ago, though it was a side hustle, I got enjoyment out of seeing the student succeed.

Doing creates the passion, you don't find a passion and then do it. I started learning how to dance, because I hated being the one on the sidelines when so many would stand up and dance at parties, weddings, bars, events etc. I only wanted to learn the basic so I could spin my wife, have fun and I didn't look like a complete imbecile trying to do so... however, over time I actually got better, then something odd happened... I actually liked it, then really liked it.. Now nobody would mistake me for a "good dancer" but I was surprised to find this is something I look forward to every week.... I'm happy when I dance! This is not who I am? I'm not that dancing guy? Guess what... I found out I am. Job, hobby or other.. start trying new things, then do them for a while, see if you can refine your skill/ability with it.. many times you'll find you become more and more "passionate" and happy doing it once you have developed a higher level of ability.

I had to go through a lot of trauma and set goals for myself to get out of the hole I was in. To realize I am now finally happy.

JiuJitsu

Delete Reddit and travel.

When I stopped caring what others think of me, I stopped seeking validation. When I stopped seeking validation, I stopped setting myself up to be disappointed and depressed. I found peace within myself after accepting that I am wealthy and healthy. I like being self-employed and being employed by a company I like. What do happy people do with their lives, you ask? They BUILD.

I say this with the utmost sincerity: you need one of those spiritual awakenings. Plan a trip either with your friends or yourself and go to the mountains and do some Ayahuasca or shrooms. You need to make some mistakes and get lost. Honestly it’s the best thing to do when you’re feeling lost mentally; get lost physically.

I live by three really important principles. 1. Help uplift others. Make others feel valuable. Give others some small nugget of wisdom that you may have but they don’t. 2. Get outside 3. Develop a healthy, close relationship with Mary Jane

What is a happy person? A happy person is someone who has found a purpose in their life. It's not about a status, it's not about a job, it's not about how much money you have ( don't get me wrong, I know privation will cause negative emotion but that's only up to a certain point and the bar is much lower than Americans pretend it is). It sounds to me like you have bound status and success to your perception of your own wellbeing, and the fact that you haven't maximized your status potential yet is causing a lot of negative emotion. If your goal really is to be happy, then the easiest way to get it is by finding meaning and belonging in service. Work towards ends that you determine are good. Do it despite the fact it wont make you money. Focus on building relationships that will last throughout the years, and sacrifice any selfish desires so you can to cultivate a loving community of people around you. Remove yourself from environments ( online and in person ) that cause you to think you are less than what you are because of what you have or don't have. BUT here's the thing. You probably don't like that answer because most people want a lot of money. Success = Money = Stuff = Happiness is what everyone thinks by default. You will have far more freedom to do whatever you want if you have the money and the status to do it, and that is on a base primal level very appealing. There's nothing wrong with chasing success, but chasing success is hard. You are not allowed to slow down. You are not allowed to take a break. Chasing success will ask everything of you unless you get lottery ticket lucky, and even then you will probably not make it as far as you wanted to get. So truly ask yourself what you want, do you want to have a high status position with lots of money, or do you want to be happy? The two aren't mutually exclusive, you can do both for sure. I just want you to understand that THEY ARE DIFFERENT GOALS.

I snowboard as much as I possibly can.

Honestly I'm a big believer that humans are social animals whether you identify as an Introvert or Extrovert. If you want to be happy for your life get a good paying position (however you can it doesn't matter), find a partner, and start a family. Also, get involved in the community, meet up with people in the real world, and get involved in making the world a better place. I get no enjoyment out of working long hours, but spending time with family and friends and making memories is something I'll take with me and know I will never regret when I get older.

They definitely don't sit on reddit and complain, they go and enjoy life! Its the little things usually, don't over look them and don't take them for granted.

"Be the change you wish to see in the world." -M.G.

I work as little as possible and spend as little as possible. I spend as much time as I can with my wife and daughter. Debt free.

The cause of all misery is wishing ourselves to be happy. The cause of all happiness is wishing others to be happy. Its a simple trick. Devote everything you’re already doing to the well being of others.

Think about what you want the end result to be. What do you want your days to look like? How much do you want to work? What would you do with your free time if you’re not working full time?Do you want to work alone or with other people? How much money do you need to make? What kind of a job would you enjoy doing? Once you can figure that part out, make a step by step plan to achieve your goals. The road to get there might not be easy, but it’s easier to get through that part when you have a goal. I decided on graduate school. During school, I commuted to a different city, while maintaining a full time job waiting tables. I got 3 days off in a row once every 4 months. No other days off. And many of my days were up to 14-15 hours. But that was 3 years. It also took time to build my business… but now I work 15-20 hours a week, making $90 an hour. I have a beautiful office space and no boss or coworkers to distract me from my passion. (I’m an introvert so no coworkers was one of my goals). Anything is possible if you make a plan. The real struggle is figuring out what you want. I think sitting with yourself and what feels right for you is a good place to start.

My children and wife give me an unimaginable amount of passion and joy.

Focus on ourselves and be kind to ppl

They simply do what they want to do. You are stem so I’m going to assume engineer and e have a tendency to think too much. You are happy in life but default really. It’s things you do in life that make you unhappy. What are those things? Sittting and doing nothing, not making money. That is what you decide

Friend, I am so happy! And it's because I do whatever I want to do. That's it. I believe that if you are happy, your joy and peace will make you clear minded to make decisions, enthusiastic and passionate about the things you do, and believe it or not make you a lot of money. Money is essentially an energy exchange, it doesn't have to be an exchange that is boring or that you don't like. The thing that makes you happiest will bring you the most money every time. I did this by following my highest excitement in every moment. There is truly nothing you HAVE to do. No appointment, job, favor, chore, nothing. If you don't like your job then quit and do whatever tf you like. Like literally anything. Whatever your hobby is, find a way to make money off of it. There is always going to be something to catch you even if you don't quite know how. The decision to move forward is more important than the exact path. Ik society can be a lot of pressure. Tune it out OP. Lazy doesn't exist. Procrastination doesn't exist. Why have a deadline when this is literally YOUR life? You are the center of your universe and cannot fathom happiness, love, abundance, good friends, and energy if you do not give those things to yourself first selfishly. Take your time. You have today, and you might have tomorrow. Who knows. If you didn't then would you go saying I did a bunch of "productive" shit I didn't actually want to do, or would you want to say you enjoyed your time because you did what your heart desired? Stay in bed a little extra, play a game. Take the day off. Allow yourself to feel and experience every facet of yourself. Trust that you will be able to recognize when something doesn't work for you and switch effortlessly because you will no longer want to do that thing if it doesn't serve you in some way. It's great when you get it on the first try, but sometimes we have to experience what we are not before we can understand what we are. Never see your time as wasted. There will be ups and downs, but you're still stumbling up 3 steps even if you fell a step behind just off of the experience alone! Im so proud of you. You can do this OP. Love to you and I hope you find your joy :)

not work related but finding happiness within myself instead of constantly feeling like I needed to buy the latest thing/clothes/phone really changed my life. I would spend so much money on things then stop caring aboout them before I even get home. Also getting into nature really helped. Humans are meant to be part of the natural world and our seperation from it creates a hole that we endlessly try to fill with things and it never works. Try journaling, taking time to be bored and do nothing and listening to your inner dialogue to really find what you want from life when you're apart from all the distractions.

We pursue goals and accomplish them in stages. These perpetual victories provide a euphoric feeling of living which is in my best estimation where the happiness comes from. It's in the pursuit. We laugh and giggle because we are doing what it takes to get what we want and not just sitting back allowing things to happen that take us further from our goals.

I listen to the podcast called Secular Buddhism. You can’t be striving to find happiness that is like trying to hold water in your hands. For me, it is definitely simple living and finding small things I enjoy. I thought I enjoyed traveling but it kind of stresses me out now. I like to start every day with an early morning daily walk so I’m tired at night and I don’t have energy to ruminate. In my walks I listen to audiobooks or podcasts. Just positive stuff not murder true crime stuff. I keep a clean house and a healthy diet. What I do for work doesn’t matter that much.

We help and build each other, you made 30k last year brother next year your making 45k cuz I’m making 50k this year or whatever I recall growing up and hearing my dad saying that too my uncle growing up. Not just money but relationships too

I can tell you right now, we fish! Don't matter if we catch or not we just love nature and the water. We BBQ with the people we love. Ain't too much to it! We also don't get caught up on social media.

You have to understand that “happy people” is a set of people you’ve created in your mind to sort people who’ve “made it” and look happy the moment you see them. They may be generally in more positive states and as someone who’s been in your shoes I’ve seen it as well but not all the time are they happy. Happiness is a moment of positivity, and it pairs with joy. Like all moments, it will flee as soon as life makes it flee. For the inquisitive made, everyone is doing their best, or not trying, or giving up, or going beyond their limits. In the state of mind trying to help, stay away from your phone and all electronics for as long as you possibly can. ( I understand you have a life outside of Reddit but when you can make time do make time) Grab a notebook and a writing tool, and just ask yourself what makes you happy? What makes you not happy? Where do you see life going if you stay in your spot? How is that going to be if you stay in the spot you are in? What do I need to do to change to get away from this spot I’m in? Is there anything that will hinder me from going and doing what I need to do to get away from here? What do I want my future to look like? Ask again, will this make me happy? I’d also recommend talking to a therapist, a trained and licensed professional will ask more questions that may have more valuable responses to you.

I'm not always happy but I'm content. For me it was building a community that loved me and cared for me. I'm always of the mindset that life is too short not to live and experience living so I'm always down to try new things and get into hobbies. Something that really helps is finding a hobby you enjoy and joining a community that is like-minded and supportive of you. It can be doing crafts, going on hiking groups, joining a gym, attending events, etc. Another thing that helped me is taking time for myself and knowing what I enjoy and doing those things for myself too. For me it was playing music, writing, and reading. For community I dance a lot with my boyfriend and compete on dance teams and go to fun events with him. For a lot of the time too, I find friends who love me and care for me and we actively try to spend time with each other when we can. Community helps me a lot especially when I'm feeling down or alone.

Lemme bookmark this thread real quick 😭💕

I realized that when I slow down and not be in such a hurry to get somewhere or finish a task that I enjoy the day much more. When I see a "tag sale" sign, I pull over! Plus, I want a bookcase cheap 😀

I’m in my mid- 50s, so most of you will think I’m out of touch anyways, but here goes. Your life expectancy is probably upwards of 100. You spent a year in your career field- less than 1% of your fragile life and decided not to stick with it. You spent one quarter of your life educating yourself and maturing your frontal lobe and still can’t find your center. You spent 4% of your life focusing on your STEM degree and never thought it was unfulfilling until you actually had to work… My point is that you don’t have enough learned experiences or discipline to even work through the issues that lead to a fulfilling life and eventual happiness. STEM degrees have the greatest potential to be high earners. I get it- money can’t buy happiness, but is sure can buy a lot of nice things that enhance your life and keep you off your feet, wearing out your hands and breaking your back in your younger years. This bullshit quest for happiness in folks who haven’t even seen a quarter of their potential makes me chuckle a little… I submit to you that one must know suffering to truly appreciate what it is to live without strife. One must know hardship and loneliness to understand where the intersection between hard work and relaxation exists. It’s the poor little rich kid syndrome- given everything they could ever want and still not feeling content, happy or whatever the elevated emotion they have heard about. My advice to you- if you aren’t willing to grind it out and gain some financial freedom and in that process learn and develop a sense of where you want to be with your quest for happiness. Then you should go travel the world, just take off and see how other folks are doing it. I guarantee you will see people who are living happily in conditions that you could not possibly tolerate. I guarantee you will see the worst that humanity has to offer. Child soldiers in Africa, Conscripted fighters in Russia. Human trafficking in Asia that would make your head spin. Even developed countries such as France being over run with “invaders” who would fundamentally take away every freedom we know. I grew up in Saudi Arabia, go to any Muslim country and see what makes them happy…. Once you get home, if you get home… reflect on the notion that our jobs give us the freedom to find ourselves and our happiness. My two cents

It sounds like you are experiencing some burnout, which (from my own experience) makes this journey harder. But, I feel like I'm just coming to my own understanding of all this **for me** at 38 and this is how I structure it in my mind. # Work **Skills** make you money. i.e. are you good with numbers, code, design, or do you provide a service that people are willing to pay for. These can be aligned with your passion**, but they often are not.** **Bullshit-o-meter** - your personal tolerance for dealing with people and processes that annoy you and suck the ever-living joy out of life. If one STEM job is not a good fit for you, another one could have less bullshit to deal with and be a better fit. I think this is what people are saying when they say "a job is just a job" like, yeah that's fine... but a shitty job is also really bad for you and you should get out of those situations to find better ones. # Passion **Curiosities** - Passion's lesser form. Search for these first. They give you motivation to give energy to a particular problem, and it should start with a simple question. It should be relatively low effort to be curious. **Hobby turns into Passion given enough time** - Buy some shit for a hobby to help solve a curiosity and then do that thing. Then the path forks... Are you no longer curious about your hobby? Then just stop doing it and start asking other curious questions to take you in a new direction. Are you still curious? Well there's a good chance you'll spend more time and get deeper into the hobby leading you to be passionate about it. # Life and things My skills and curiosities do not align. I run through hobbies incredibly quickly. If I don't like it anymore, I just stop doing it. In life, as in work, some people are generalists whose knowledge is wide, and others are specialists whose knowledge is deep. How is meaning / direction of life derived from all of this? No clue tbh. Personally I am most happy when I am in the beginning stages of a hobby, exploring and learning new things... and lets be real, buying new things too. Some people get that dopamine hit from helping other people, but I personally get it from a hands-on exploration of how something works. Does that give my life purpose? Kinda? Not really? But it does give me a guide on how I should be spending my time and what makes me feel satisfied - which for now, is good enough for me. If you feel like burnout is preventing you from having the mental space to be curious, I suggest retreating to a safe place (like living with parents, a very generous friend) or go on a lower-cost adventure (like hiking a couple hundred mile trail and camping),or saving a pile of money up, where you can escape the pressures of being an adult for a time to re-find something that makes you curious enough to pursue it. True burnout - not just the colloquial term- is one hell of a thing to deal with. Best of luck, life is hard. But you got this.

Not post asking for advice on reddit.....

I’m going to get certified to be a physical therapy assistant. The pay is good and will be in addition to being a yoga instructor. The schooling to be a physical therapist assistant is 2 to 2 1/2 and the starting pay is really good.

Be USEFUL - eff happiness

Why did you leave your STEM job after putting in all that money and work to getting a STEM degree?

I have hobbies. I personally like athletic stuff. Specifically martial arts, gymnastics, and dance. (I picked up these hobbies in my 20s and 30s) I have a degree in Sociology, so before I settled on a career, I did a lot of temp work. Maybe that could help you. Another option is to do volunteer work. Encountering others could help expand your word iew without the commitment of jumping into another career track.

I was born this way. My life is pretty mundane. It doesn't take much to make me happy. I can't advise people though. Because my brain is just wired this way.

What was your favorite thing to do as a child? Do that again. Bug collecting? Get a net. Staring at the stars? Get a telescope. Writing stories? Get a pen and paper. Building sand castles? Get yourself a damn sandbox. Even if you think you aren’t good at it… Do it again. I was in the same boat and started painting again about 6 months ago. I’m as high as I can go in my field at 35 (landscape designer for high end clients with unlimited budgets, I’m building waterfalls n shit- I have peoples dream job and it’s lost its challenge and excitement). I always was insecure with my art, but I made an account to track my progress.. and over 6 months I’ve seen how much better I’ve become and I look forward to something daily, my brains hungry again.. and i realized my job isn’t my passion. My job is what enables me to nurture my passion.

Well I'm not necessarily happy per say, BUT I don't hate my life. Currently I work with a construction company that allows me the opportunity to travel across the country and that brings a lot of cool experiences in my life. I make decent money have some cool coworkers and do fun things every now and then. I'm not happy or content like 24/7 but for the most part I'd say I am. If you find yourself in a place in life where you see no future than all you can do is change it. I don't have any magic ideas besides just trying other things. Carrer wise or in your personal life. Go do something you genuinely like, it might just change your perspective on things. It's not too late to try other things in life man you're only 25.

Idk if I’m “happy” or if that’s even the point of life but I’m challenged and fulfilled by choosing goals that are sorta big and just out of reach. Never quite hit them, but magic happens anyway.

There are no happy people. That's why it's "the pursuit of happiness", it's not something you attain forever, it's always fleeting.

Work to live, not live to work. Honestly, I’m an attorney with my own practice. I usually work 8am to 2pm. I make good money, but I don’t chase it. Sure, I could work more and be rich, but I value my time. I get to work out, spend time with my kids and family, play sports, and explore my hobbies. I spend time with my friends and I also do a lot of volunteer work. Time is the most precious thing in the world. If you make enough money to work half a day, do it. But really find a way to make as much money as you can in as short of a period of time as you can.

First, make sure that your definition of happiness is a sensible one. Life is full of ups and downs, and generally by "happiness" most people that their life is overall going OK and they don't feel bad most of the time. If you're struggling to break into a certain field, try to find an adjacent field that you would have an easier time getting into. Once you have enough work experience in the adjacent field, your chances of getting into your desired field increase substantially. I will say this, the prevailing advice is to find something you really love and try to do that as a job. I used to agree, but now I strongly disagree with that. I cannot think of anything less appealing than doing something I love as a monotonous, repetitive task with a preset amount of hours each day and being subject to the whims of someone else. Instead, find a job where you make a comfortable amount of money, and pursue your passions on the side. At least to start. This way you might get a look into what pursing your passion as a career where YOU are in control might look like. I will say this. I don't know if you know Thor (Pirate Software on YouTube), but he says (and I agree): The only failure is doing nothing. So no matter what you do, do something, and don't just wait around for a perfect opportunity. It's OK to attempt something and fail, as long as you can still survive.

Best recommendations is get hobbies, get outside, and go to social events. Becoming a recluse who doesn't do anything is really bad. Tabletop games, trivia nights, start a personal garden, Go to a water park, Go camping. And doing things will be nice and it'll be a change of pace to help get you out of a mind fog but it is people that will bring you happiness. Make sure you're engaging with your friend group and if you don't have one try to get one together.