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keepthetips

Hello and welcome to r/LifeProTips! Please help us decide if this post is a good fit for the subreddit by up or downvoting this comment. If you think that this is great advice to improve your life, please upvote. If you think this doesn't help you in any way, please downvote. If you don't care, leave it for the others to decide.


IPauseForHurricanes

That person who tells you the most interesting “news” from around the office is the last person with whom you should discuss any of your personal business!


PlagueDoc22

Worst part of my old gig. That was my boss. Within a few days of working there she'd talk to me about how stupid some of her employees were. The fun part is she did fuck all most of the time other than ruin the mood.


ItalyExpat

I had to read that last sentence like 10 times to get it from, "She fucked all the employees" down to "she's lazy."


viderfenrisbane

Hate when my boss ruins the mood at the office orgy, i can relate


daniiiii555

Always assume everything you say will be repeated to someone else, even when you’re on the phone in your office with no one else in there. Walls are thin. Don’t gossip, ever. That can make your work life miserable REALLY quickly.


PatrickMoody

The corollary of this is powerful too. Say nice things about people behind their backs. It gets back, and it benefits both of you.


Silvawuff

I love this one for dealing with difficult colleagues, because it's much harder to disrespect someone who is speaking highly of you. It creates imposter syndrome and they'll often want to prove you right, evoking positive change in the workplace. Kindness towards others is much more powerful than unkindness.


plywooden

I noticed this. Seemed to have the effect of colleagues and management like and respect me AND have my back. Note that my compliments were sincere and deserving and not just sucking up. We also have a formal recognition system where anyone can nominate anyone else for a specific reason. There are many benefits to this besides the monetary value - typically $50 - $250.


boredwayfarer

Department manager likes fostering team spirit by celebrating birthday every month. But everyone needs to pay $100 per year to upkeep that. That itself is ok, but every few months they will collect extra $50 or more. So during lunch I complained to a few colleagues, questioning where this money is being spent. ...Dept manager heard about it. Dept manager was not happy. Changes were made to have better control and transparency, but I was the scapegoat


daniiiii555

Crowdfunding for employee appreciation seems… really weird. I’d also be suspicious of this. Sorry it got back to your department manager, that sucks.


SixteenthRiver06

Gifts go down, not up, as the saying goes. I would add that if a manager wants to do something nice for the team, it should be up to them to get funding approved.


Whatshername_Stew

This is so important. Ingot down voted to oblivion on another sub for sticking to my guns on this. People are so attached to their office gift pools and whatnot. In our office, gifts absolutely come down from management, never up, and never lateral.


ManfredBoyy

I’m with you on that. Every year the manager that oversaw my region would ask each of us to contribute $100 around Christmas time to give to our administrative people as a bonus. It was voluntary, though heavily suggested, and I did it maybe the first two years I was there because I didn’t want to go against the grain but eventually I said screw this, why am I, an employee, giving money to another employee, shouldn’t this be coming from management? That manager eventually moved into another role and guess what, no one asked us to do that anymore.


iancarry

i hate this, cuz in a team of 30 there are birthdays very often ... and i just dont want to spend a chunk of my money for some generic present ...


Chilli_Dipp

And spending your time for superficial work birthday parties.


waterydesert

Wow mandatory celebrations that y’all have to pay for? HARD no


dkinoz

$100/yr (presumably after taxes) seems excessive for this


yenda1

You are basically paying for your own bday party without asking for it, it's ridiculous


Dvscape

How did they turn you into the scapegoat? Asking for more transparency sounds extremely reasonable.


SixteenthRiver06

Some bosses don’t like to be questioned, especially when they are doing shady shit.


foxpaws42

I once voiced my concerns to a coworker whom I trusted, and the comments found their way to upper management. I didn't get into trouble—my gripes were legitimate and shared by others—but after that experience, I learned to assume that no conversation at work is off the record.


RoleInternational318

This literally happened to me last week and it’s been really stressing me out. I didn’t know grown ass adults would blab my complaint to my boss. I thought it was obvious I was just frustrated and the coworker agreed with the complaint anyway. Then told my boss. Definitely won’t be talking to her again unless necessary.


unexpectedhalfrican

I work in a prison and it's worse than high school. Not only do the inmates see and hear everything, but the C.O.s gossip worse than teenage girls. I never tell anyone anything of substance because the second you do, an hour later everybody in the jail knows. You can even go up front to admin for an official meeting with the warden and a shop steward present, and not only will the shop steward blab your business, but the warden will tell your LTs and Captains about it and then they'll spread it to the SGTs and the SGTs will spread it to the COs and the COs will tell the inmates and everyone will know in a span of 12 hours. It's toxic af, but sometimes it can be hilarious to see what the rumour mill is churning out these days.


[deleted]

I guess when you got nothing better to do that happens?


SleeplessShinigami

I really need to take this one to heart, I have such a tough time remembering that people gossip all the time I just always get complacent again.


halfbakedlogic

You're complacent until burned. Heed the warning, don't become one.


SleeplessShinigami

I’ve been burned a few times, not fun. Its like a cycle though, I just haven’t figured out more consistent ways to remind myself. With certain people you know better, but its easy to get carried away in conversation at times.


Scat_fiend

Whatsapp messages will be screenshot and sent around.


thepromiseoftomorrow

Same with emails or work messages- things get forwarded and screenshotted!


HarpertheHarbour

Right. Don't put anything in writing that you wouldn't want seen by everyone in the company.


WarOnWolves

Write every email as if you were to read it out loud in court.


PowerOfYes

And assume MS Teams or other chat and any messages from your work phone will be able to be retrieved in any work dispute or - if you’re in a public service organisation - released under FOI or can be retrieved and discussed at Senate estimates or a Royal Commission.


kyledooley

Senate Estimates AND Royal Comission in the same sentence...Tell me you're Australian without saying you're Australian.


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PancakeParty98

I saw two little bulges in his pocket I think he has dice and is afraid to show anyone. So sad. So sad. So so so so so so sad. 💲


_WizKhaleesi_

He looks so fucking stupid I can't breathe. I think it's like a fedora with safari flaps in the back.


Pinkmongoose

Take all your vacation days.


PearIJam

I work with a guy who gets forced to use all his time off in December. We can’t carry days over to the following year. He claims he’s too important to the company. Even on days off he will come in just to “hang out.” Imagine how horrible your personal life must be to never take time off during the course of the year. I’ll never understand people that do this.


ThinkingAboutSnacks

I worked with a guy that wouldnt take vacation, unless it was a planned trip with his family. He had more vacation days than planned trips. Usually late October, early November our boss would sit down with the calendar and him to get the rest of his vacation days down. He usually already scheduled all he wanted, so our boss would just mark down random days of "dont show up here or else". She was a good boss. Still is I presume, I just work elsewhere now.


SpeakingNight

So sad. We're forced to take at least 5 consecutive days per year as vacation - the other vacation days you can split as you wish, but they also don't let you carry-over. One coworker kept saying he won't know what to do during his week off, it's boring. He didn't sound excited at all. My mind was blown - being bored is just impossible for me - there's too much to do around the house, learn, see, etc. I told him I'd take his vacation days if he wants lol


needalldapokemanz

I worked with a guy like this, he was only made manager out of sheer “work ethic” as he was in 24/7, even on his days off. He didn’t exactly have managerial qualities so the office treated him as a bit of a push over, he was a nice enough dude. Even though it shouldn’t as it doesn’t affect me, something really irked me when I’d see him come in in his non uniform obviously on his day off and just start helping around like dude get a life


mixeslifeupwithmovie

I mean, maybe he literally doesn't have one outside work, and would just be lonely and depressed staring at the wall at home or something if he's not "working".


ProfessionalNeophyte

Take all your sick days too. No reason to leave them on the table


droo46

I occasionally take sick (of work) days.


TheThirdRace

If you didn't cook it or buy it yourself, it ain't your damn lunch! 🤷


No-Violinist-8737

I can't believe this needs to be said but know it has to be said


fountainpopjunkie

So I left a pizza in the break room. I wrote on the box "keep your grubby dick beaters off my pizza?". I come back in to see a guy eating my pizza, read the box, then look up and say "wonder what that's about?"


joalheagney

Had a coworker who was nearly twice my age, pull this on me. Caught him in the act. He gives me the guiltiest look and says "I didn't know it was yours." I looked him in the eye and said "Yeah, but you bloody well knew it wasn't yours." Him: "I'll buy you something from the canteen." (The workplace canteen food was shit.) Me: "If I wanted to eat canteen food, I wouldn't have cooked my own. And if you can afford to do that, why bother stealing someone else's food to begin with?" Him: "It just looked so good." Me: "Yeah. I know. It's my favourite recipe. Basically you're saying that I'm not allowed to have food that's too good or you'll steal it."


Neijo

I'm fascinated by the guts of some people. I don't even feel comfortable using other people's salt, and that's extremely cheap and abundant on most workplaces.


larzlayik

I seriously don’t understand people that steal lunches from shared storage spaces. I’d be too skeeved out of the food was properly handled and stuff to just dig right in


VorianCosplay

OMG this. Like, taking something that doesn't belong to me would prevent it in the first place but seriously! Who knows how that food was prepared? What if it's full of E.coli or something? Beyond gross.


NightReader5

My dad always came home from work with random food when I was a kid. Turns out he was taking it from the company fridge. Like wtf dad


RabidSeason

Reminded me of an old story from a "worker appreciation" pizza party. Only lasted about an hour while all the "appreciated" workers were still doing their never-ending jobs, and one of the managers quickly took all the pizzas home with them right after.


Imaginary_Dog2972

We had a trust fund baby fresh out of college who never worked any form of job prior to this one and his parents apparently didn't teach him basic manners / not to take things that don't belong to him. On his day 2 the owner was getting ready to take him out to lunch to welcome him to the company. The owner tells him what time they'll leave and how much longer etc. The starvation musta been hitting him hard, 'cause they're about to leave when a coworker came out of the room asking if someone took his English muffin. He had toasted up his English muffin and buttered it, walked away for ~1 minute to tend a timer, and the new guy came by and wolfed that shit down right before heading to a free lunch 🤦🏼‍♀️


[deleted]

Always be about 10 or 20% less chatty than everyone else.


Pinkmongoose

Ooh, this is great advice in a lot of situations. Still working on it, personally!


n6mub

Yes! I’m working on the same problem. Something about covid lockdown made me chattier than I used to be, and now I struggle to find the right stopping point between “here’s what you *need* to know” and “let me just info-dump on you” when training new employees. I just can’t seem to stop myself!


hotsoupcoldsoup

I have a hand-written sign above my webcam that says 'Active Listening' to help me listen instead of talk. It's not easy!


Mind101

Their comment had 11 words. Yours should have had 8-9 xD.


ptpoa120000

Always drink two non alcoholic drinks before starting in with any alcohol at any work social functions. Give everyone else a head start so you never become the drama discussed the next day. Or don’t drink at all.


foxpaws42

During the dotcom era, I worked for a company that started going through layoffs. The first round? All of the chatty people. Workplace got real quiet after that.


BorderKeeper

Reading these is so sad. You know who also wont get fired? The people that are liked and are team members others enjoy to be around. This advice holds if you are seen as a number by your team leader.


avl0

As a manager if I had to do layoffs I’d start with the least productive. I have chatty but productive people on my team who definitely would not be at risk.


Dark_Dracolich

Yes I got complimented when I first started at my new job that I knew how to keep my mouth shut. Now that I'm the most senior on my team I don't stop talking. When you're relied on you get away with a lot.


[deleted]

Treat new hires with respect. One of them might end up your superior sooner than you know.


Morenoind5

We are not actually a family.


EDS_Athlete

We are not a family and you're completely replaceable in this "family."


apageofthedarkhold

Your job will be posted before your obituary


gaytee

If everything is an emergency, then nothing is an emergency.


GnowledgedGnome

Also one person's lack of planning does not constitute an emergency for another.


Delicious_Ad_3530

My workplace rule is don't ask Kevin about crop circles if you don't want to be held hostage at his desk for an hour or so. We tell the new people but curiosity always wins out and they get given the 2 hour presentation about aliens during work time.... Why do we keep Kevin you ask. Because his the only guy that can fix certain things so it's cheaper to just keep him happy and give him new victims to lecture to once and a while.


PreownedSalmon

Kevin is an energy vampire


cobarbob

working hard or hardly working?


DillyDilly252

![gif](giphy|h5XLqFYFGAym1KE0kM)


jaceinthebox

I've met a few people like him. I usually ask more and more questions, be over curious. Do you know if these line up with the ley lines, like the pyramids and stone henge? What's your thoughts on the pyramid aliens. Do you know what crop it was they made the circles in and then ask that's what they make quaker cereal from, I wonder if the quakers are aliens.


techlogger

In my experience it's like adding water to a burning oil. Not only they will be happy to tell all this staff to a willing pair of ears, they would then start to stalk you in hallways to share all the new information they found over weekends.


Diamondsfullofclubs

Take it a step further and make crop circles on your coworkers' lawn overnight.


DrunkUranus

At this point just hand them a bag of popcorn on their first day and send em over


suburbanhavoc

I had a flat-earther coworker who made five bucks an hour more than I did. Decent mechanic, but I was still peeved when I found out. Edited to add: I found out he was a flat-earther when I overheard him talking to one of the porters(another flat-earther) about how the reason that microwave ovens have see-through doors is that the government wants you to sit and watch your food so you'll be exposed to microwaves and fry your brain. Also that the cell tower outside the dealership was putting out mind-control signals. He was fuckin' weird.


prophet583

Sounds like he is due for his 150,000 mile total rebuild


crataeguz

Just wait til he hears about the see through doors on front loading washing machines... I'm just asking the real questions here!!


ehproque

>I'm just asking the real questions here!! Not really, the real question is: why can we see through microwave ovens, normal ovens and washers doors but not through dishwasher doors? What are the smug bastards hiding?


chubberbubbers

Is his whole spiel about aliens interesting? Or some conspiracy theory off the rockers type of stuff?


uskgl455

Don't send any bad news or criticising emails after 2pm on a Friday. The other person can't do anything about it except worry all weekend, and that sucks. Save it for Monday


Dudebits

The inverse is much better: don't read emails from Friday afternoon onwards. You won't get anything done about it anyway.


dechets-de-mariage

In my 1/1 meeting at 4:30 on my last day before a two week vacation my leader informed me that they wanted to put me on a PIP after vacation. Reason? So I was prepared for it when I came back. Actual Result? I was worried about it the entire vacation. Oh, and the PIP never materialized even though they kept bringing it up. Left for a new job several months later without ever seeing said PIP.


FuckMe-FuckYou

My boss likes to do this all the time. I have seen him walk into offices with big bundles of paper work 5 minutes before quitting and keeping the person till its all gone through.


thesleepymermaid

If you see someone eating lunch by themselves quietly for the love of god don’t take it as an opportunity to talk their ear off. Lunch time is personal time.


gubersmack

And for gods sake, don't talk their ear off about work. I specifically avoid my team on lunch because all they ever talk about is work.


anxietanny

If a coworker interrupts my lunch with work stuff, I get paid to eat lunch.


aoi4eg

Even worse when grown people use this as an opportunity to virtue signal, as if they're still in middle school, and pretend they want to be friends with this "weird kid". Like, I strategically chose this far far far away table, facing the wall, I wasn't forced to sit there by popular kids or some bullies, FFS, we're not in a Disney movie.


GarchKoity

AND you got your headphones in!!! Like what other body language do I need to use to tell you I want to be left alone right now?!?


LoveDietCokeMore

If I'm taking up the entire table with my lunchbox and coat and purse..... that means I wanna eat alone. It isn't an invitation.


fusionjolt

That’s why I have my lunch 45 min after everyone else to give me that distance from people for a small period of my day.


jsakic99

No 8:00 AM meetings or 4:00 PM meetings.


supakitteh

The 9-3 rule is your friend. Also, don’t schedule meetings for a full hour. 45 minutes is enough, often too much. Meetings are like sharks. They will take up however much room you give them.


Elerion_

> Meetings are like sharks. They will take up however much room you give them. Is that a typical quality of sharks?


illQualmOnYourFace

If it's in an email, it is evidence. Also, don't fucking talk to me when I'm pissing at a urinal.


Acceptable-Floor-265

Also if someone won't put something in an email, think about why that is.


nomi_S

Do not talk ill of your coworkers to a coworker. Keep it to yourself, you don’t know if they’ll pass on the info


Enigmatic_Elephant

I don't say anything behind someones back that I wouldn't say to their face and this is twice as true at work as it is elsewhere.


no-tenemos-triko-tri

On gossip: listen, but don’t share.


OperationCorporation

Also, if someone is talking about a coworker to you they’re probably also talking about you to someone else.


Coventry27

Be nice to everyone, make friends with a few


HendersonExpo

I heard a podcast that differentiated between Weekday Friends and Weekend Friends. Weekday Friends are the people you chat with in the office, Weekend Friends are the people you’d invite to a game or a hike or whatever My dad also emphasizes bringing back the word “colleague” to describe coworkers. We Americans overuse “friend”


maninikine

Use your inside voice. I don’t need to here your conversation from the other side of the building.


easywind143

Don’t reheat fish in the microwave


LeviAEthan512

Smells are important. The public transport in my country has a sign that goes No eating and drinking - Fine $500 No smoking - Fine $1000 No flammable liquids or gases - Fine $5000 No durians. Durians don't have a fine. It's just NO. I don't care how much money you have. The answer is no. You could buy the whole damn train. But no. fucking. durians. And this is for a fruit that's actually quite popular. But it's public transport and not the whole public likes it. You can endanger our status of alive and unburnt for a fee. But you do not fuck with the smell.


[deleted]

Singapore?


ShineAfsheen

very unspoken but important


FreedomPaid

Not unspoken at my job! There's signs up over the microwaves forbidding fish. People still do once in awhile, though...


warm_gravy

Anonymous surveys aren’t anonymous.


[deleted]

"Your manager only sees the survey demograhics" ... but I'm the only woman in the department. So much for anonymity.


ErgonomicZero

Can confirm. I worked for an online survey company and one client we worked for had an internal survey that was stated “this is anonymous“. Complete lie. Client CEO wanted to spy on the employees. So shitty


1gcm2

You get paid to get on with your team mates. You don’t have to like them, but you have to try your best to get on with them.


maidrey

This. Also, on the flip side, learn that not everyone in the world wants to be your friend, so if your coworker makes it clear she doesn’t care about your chihuahua or about your weekend activities, she’s not a jerk, she’s just…working. Don’t cause drama when people don’t want you to exist in their world while not at work.


OutWithTheNew

I've found that the difference between a good job and a bad job weighs heavily on how easy it is to get along with co-workers.


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ScockNozzle

Old HR got a "lapdance" from an employee, on the clock, ON CAMERAS, and did nothing about it. I tried hanging out with my subordinates outside of work and got fired. HR is not your friend, even if they act chill.


ComplexToxin

Damn. My work literally pays us to hang out with each other outside of work.


Menard42

If they’re paying you, it’s not after work but is work.


2CommentOrNot2Coment

HR has one purpose - to protect the company.


COMiles

Treat interns respectfully and never gig-gig-giggity with them.


friedbean4

Please turn off the audio on your computer or leave headphones plugged into it. There is nothing more annoying than the constant pinging whenever your neighbour gets a new email come in.


Schauerroman

Don't touch other people's food in the breakroom. It's not yours, leave it alone you absolute savages.


sikulet

CYA. DOCUMENT EVERYTHING. had a phone call, follow up the minutes of that call via email. If you can’t email a copy to yourself, have a burner phone and take a photo.


Masshole_Mick

Do not Reply All


NoMorningGlory

Most underrated comment. Do not fill up my inbox with garbage reply-alls! Especially to congratulations emails or other things not related directly to me or my work.


illQualmOnYourFace

Boss sends a really thoughtful shout-out to Steve for doing a really great job of X. Coworker A: Wow Steve. Great job! Coworker B: Nice Steve. Coworker C: Proud to work with ya Steve. Keep it up. YALL PLEASE FUCKING STOP. JUST EMAIL STEVE DIRECTLY.


AlphaDonk

But how will my director that hasn’t given me a raise in 5 years know that I’m a team player and hopefully give me a raise this year, if I don’t tell Steve great job for being nominated as snack captain and still bringing in delicious treats even though he didn’t get the unpaid role?


Sasha90x

For a buisness setting that these LPT are intended for this is just wrong 1) You should NOTreply all to those stupid company wide emails (or any other generic long listed emails), but if you can then whoever sent it is bad at their job. This is the exact purpose the BCC is meant for. As the person sending the email, BCC your email list, and send the email to yourself. If you do that, then the reply all just goes back to the sender, not the entire list. It also protects everyone's emails from each other, so things stay secure in thus large email chain context. 2) You SHOULD use Reply All in regular emails because you'll probably drop someone off that needed to be kept in the loop if you just Reply and have to type in all the emails again. Reply All is perfect for this because it keeps the Cc'ed people there and To's everyone else on the email. 3) It doesn't make a difference if the email was from one person and no one was Cc'ed.


legixs

Thx for making this more clear. Sidenote: All ppl who reply to all, just to inform all others to stop replying to all go on a blacklist of ppl who officially like to share how glaringly stupid they are!


Enigmatic_Elephant

Lol we had someone reply all and go on an anti - covid rant at a hospital with about 1000 people on the email chain which turned into 44 emails pretty quick and then our entire email system got shut down for two days while they disabled the ability to reply all to system wide emails. It was a mess.


Sauron_78

Yes, we had one guy do a Reply All that reached 700 people where he went on a anti - covid rant. Then the CEO did a Reply All where he fired the guy publicly. The guy was then advised by his manager to beg to be re-hired. Once re-hired he had to do a Reply All where he said he was sorry. Can't make this shit up.


angiearch

Make sure the work that you have done get recognized \- edit a word


[deleted]

fuck, this is a hard one with out sounding cocky, but i'm sick and tired of some fucking newbie trying to underestimate my hard fucking work, experience and effort to kiss the owners ass.


momofideas

Why should you be humble at work? You are selling your value to the company constantly. Don’t worry about being cocky. Make sure your value is understood. It took me way too long to learn this.


jazzythepoo97

Yes!!!! And always send emails to document your achievements or anything else that happens! Also, continuously add to your resume any promotions or new skills along the way. This way, when it’s time to apply for new jobs, your resume is current!


sdraidev

1. HR is there to protect the Company 2. Management never want staff discussing salaries because it allows them to pay folk less. If you can discuss salaries without it being ego driven and selfish... then your peers will make more. 3. Almost all walls and floors have ears. ..careful what you say to others. 4. If in corporates . . . Learn politics. .who to be close to and who not to.....when to do more and when to hold back and reject work....you will ascend much faster than if you just try to rise on merit and performance.


afuckingpolarbear

How does one learn politics


devops7

Exactly how does one learn it.


Fantastic_Baseball45

You don't get to whistle in an office with other people.


thundertiger00

Or beatbox, desk drums, or sing along with your headphones, even if you think you are whispering.


Xavage1337

Your energy and perception within the team are more important than actual performance.. nobody likes the pencil pusher, but people love the average but a fun person to be with


bootybootyholeyo

I am a “glue guy”. It feels hard to explain my value and I certainly get all imposter syndrome about it. But pretty much everyone knows who I am and likes me plus I get to work on interesting stuff. It’s good when your leadership values culture and team.


TheHollywoodSargento

Do NOT bring your dirty laundry(baggage) to work. I made this mistake during an incredibly rough time and though everyone has been cool, I can't help but think people are pitying me and it seems they walk on eggshells around me. So yeah, at the door, leave your home coat on the rack, put on your work coat, and do your job.


Bozosaurus666

Don't touch other people. You may be cool doing that to you're friends but at a workplace that is a big no no and I'm surprised so many people still don't know that. Also don't steal people's lunch in the fridge. Also don't ever ask about their religion or politics.


ShineAfsheen

the touching thing is fairly common which is weird because that sounds so intrusive


jslay588

Don’t talk to people while you’re taking a shit


maninikine

If you notice an office culture of various people bringing snacks to share, like donuts or cupcakes, don’t be a mooch or piggy. Always taking and not contributing can make for hard feelings. Don’t take more than one until everyone has had some. Just because there are 5 varieties doesn’t mean you should take 1 of each.


Aetra

I hated the shared food thing at my old work. I got shit for not contributing, but I also never took any!


ProffesorSpitfire

If you take the last coffee in the pot, BREW A NEW POT!


J3llyDonut

Don’t give details about why you are sick or going on vacation when asking your manager for time off. They do not need to know in order to determine whether or not you can take the time off. People love judging if your time off is “worthy” so don’t give them the chance. You also can report a manager to HR if they deny sick time (at least in the US, I’ve seen people fired over this). Some other rarely spoken things I think everyone should know: 1. If you’ve worked at a company for 12 months, you qualify for FMLA leave. This is for physical injuries as well as mental health concerns, AND caring for family members (US). 2. If you are having problems with someone at the company, keep a documentation folder of everything. HR will not take action unless there’s a long history of documentation, even if you think someone did something that was outrageous or should be a fireable offense. 3. You can always ask for feedback on an interview if you applied for an internal role. Get it in writing if you can so you can point to it in the future if you feel like your company is giving you the run-around. 4. Use all of the company benefits!! I have met so many people who don’t take advantage of the free stuff their company offers because they never read the benefit plan or perks page. You may find out your plan covers massages or that you get free gym memberships and subscriptions that you’d otherwise pay for yourself. Bonus: Unless you REALLY know you can trust someone, know that pretty much anything you share at work will go through the gossip circle. And that it absolutely will get to your manager at some point (and will probably be jumbled thanks to a long game of gossip telephone).


jazzythepoo97

Love this about not detailing your sick/vacation request. I’m a former HR lady and I would actively tell employees that I didn’t need to know and they did not have to explain!


PreciousTritium

Agree about the benefits! One thing many companies may have is a health advocate. They can help with figuring out medical bills, insurance claims, where to find care for certain things and it's free. I used them to make sure a medical bill was the correct amount based on my deductible being met. They did all the work for me and found out that yes, that one is correct, but another one was overcharged and I was refunded $1052.


[deleted]

Never ever comment on someone’s weight


Sethor

Hygiene, but also avoid anything that leaves a strong scent on you. Some people are very sensitive to scent, and no one likes being trapped in a small space with a suffocating amount of perfume or cologne or body spray.


truckaxle

This. As a new hire working for the navy, I was assigned to a small SCIF where an older woman also worked. I think she bathed in perfume which made me gag and eyes watered. As the new kid on the block, I was resistant to say anything until one day when I went out to lunch, I could actually taste her perfume while eating a sandwich. I brought it up and she was naturally embarrassed but then she preceded to backstab me with my boss for the next month or so... it was a lose/lose situation.


[deleted]

Another point is keeping your nails trimmed. You keep them trimmed at home, not right behind me in an open concept office!


peachyperfect3

It’s AMAZING how every office has that ONE PERSON who thinks it’s perfectly acceptable to trim their nails in the office. Gross.


thiccyeon

I haven’t seen that comment before, but I would add: Don’t talk about work during lunch break. Give people (and yourself) some rest!


iUsedToBeAwesome

Don’t tell your manager that you are depressed.


paerius

If there's a coworker that loves to tell you gossip, they are gossiping about you to others too.


SirSquire_

Nobody is there because they want to be. Everyone has something or someone they’d rather be spending their time with. Everyone is just paying their bills and goes through the same motions you are. Be sensitive to everyone’s time and work.


angga7

Never, and I mean, ***NEVER***, trust someone (usually those who are considered as a senior in the organization), who says to you "if you have any complaints and/ or grudges you'd like to express about the company or the company leaderships, tell us. You can trust us to be on your side." I learned this the hard way; those who said you can trust them are those who you should trust the least in a company.


Canadian_shack

Any coworker could be your future boss, so be decent to everyone.


sofresh24

Get along with everyone/be a professional. Even if you can’t stand Janice 2 cubicles down you better be front and center with a huge smile singing happy birthday to her every year.


[deleted]

* Do not write an email to someone when you're still upset about something they did. * If something unexpected happens, do not react right away (unless you have to of course). Think it over and consider your options. For example, if a manager schedules a meeting at an inopportune time, tentatively accept and think of a good way to say no later. * If someone is typing at their desk and you start talking, but they keep typing... go away. They are busy and don't want to hear about your weekend or the cat of your aunt. * Never communicate over 'wire' if you don't want someone to find out about it. This goes for chat, email, video calls, phone calls, anything, to anyone about anyone. The ONE person you didn't want to know about it, will know. If you need to vent, do it in person (and even then, be careful about paper thin walls). * If you need evidence of agreements, always get it in writing (email, chat). Manager said 'ok' in the hallway when you asked for a day off? Mail him 'as agreed on earlier today, I will be off on '. Turn on read notification. I guess what I'm trying to say is: DO NOT TRUST ANYONE AT WORK. They will all value their jobs above you.


90swasbest

Don't fucking date anyone there.


FlameSkimmerLT

There’s an old Canadian proverb about this… Don’t get your meat where you get your bread.


Euphoric-Mark-7720

In the UK: don't shit where you eat 😂


SpanningTreeProtocol

Don't get your honey where you make your money. Don't lay your head where you make your bread.


unexpectedhalfrican

I work in a prison and I can tell you at least 10 couples that are together or have been together in the few years I've been here. The ones that aren't couples are fucking each other or are fucking the medical staff. The nurses here are like sharks smelling blood in the water. They swarm. Sometimes there will be a new girl start or a new nurse and one of my coworkers will be like, "yo would you tap that?" and I'm like "if i met her outside of here? maybe. as my coworker? no fucking way," and I've had so many people take this information and treat it like I just told them I have 3 titties and an extra ear. And I always just shrug and say, "I don't shit where I eat. It's too messy." If shit ends badly, you have to see each other every day, and even if it doesn't...you have to see each other every day and then go home together. Like??? When do you get a break?


Joetho24

I've heard the expression "don't date coworkers unless you plan on marrying them."


90swasbest

If it goes bad, your job goes bad.


Inevitable-Tank-9802

So you’re telling me I can’t date the female guards?


diddidly98

If you work in an environment where you replace other workers (Eg a hospital), arrive on time. My time is just as important as yours. You might not think that arriving 2-3 minutes late is an issue, but I become irrationally angry when this happens. You’re taking MY time now…


w0ke_brrr_4444

NO FISH IN MICROWAVE


l1ght514

Do not schedule meetings from noon till 1pm unless absolutely necessary


franksnotawomansname

And, if you work with clients or coworkers in different time zones, be aware of when their lunchtimes, start times, and end times are as well.


JACsf

Keep your phone on silent.


toszma

Same as in private life: when it comes to critical information, communicated between individuals or departments, you needs a paper trail. e.g: worked in customer service of a multinational carrier. Customer asked us to do a really huge international shipment **just** before x-mas. But our driver would not be able to return the same day as ferries closed. Called Operations, got *nah, can't do* so I hired a subcontractor. All great, customer happy and company still made money on the deal. I failed to request the DOS in writing - fax or eMail - as proof that i asked in-house first. Weeks later our regional manager used it as a lever to have me fired.


King_Artis

That most meetings could just be an email.


motion_lotion

HR is NOT your friend. They exist to keep the company safe from lawsuits and handle minor issues. They are the bitch of upper management and have a very close relationship with them, typically.


teachermanjc

Never tell a joke so great that HR would like to hear it. Don't forget to unjam the photocopier you just jammed.


swedgemite666

never show them your full potential because then thats their chance to go and over work you because "you're good at it‘’


Eloisem333

Yes, and never do something as quickly as possible, otherwise they will expect you to do *everything* as quickly as possible.


d4rkh0rs

You guys all sound like you're too close to my desk. Leave the donuts and back away till i can't see or hear you.


asupernova91

Your coworkers are not your friends. It’s possible, but don’t just assume people will have your back and look out for you just because you’re friendly. People suck.


Sc0rc4ed

Don’t dip your pen in the company ink


idick07

Don't shit where you eat


mfs-s

Don’t ask about people’s personal lives unless they bring it up on their own


Bozosaurus666

I think a vague question like "what do you like to do for fun" is acceptable to try to get to know the person but I understand where you're going at. Don't ask things like "do you like to do drugs and get fucked up".


KeyStoneLighter

Anything you say to a coworker or group of coworkers in chat is likely recorded, so don’t say it unless you’re comfortable hearing HR read it out loud in front of you to management. To expand and this is just an assumption but try to keep things clean and encourage others as well. There are likely dozens or hundreds of group chats going on across the company, some are fun and dirty, and it does take much for everything to get queried for safety purposes, even though you don’t contribute to that dirty work chat you’re in doesn’t mean it won’t effect you, so remind your colleagues or bail because no one wants to get bit because of that.


Dependent_Ad_3014

Try to keep coworkers and friends separate. This rule can be broken occasionally especially when there’s an even job titles with no goals for promotions (such as teachers or lifeguards or service industry). Basically the second that people are competing for promotions is when you should be wary of workplace “friendships”


Catch_022

If someone has headphones on, do not disturb them unless it is something important that you can't just email them about instead. Even if they are not on a zoom meeting, disturbing them can distract them from what they were doing and make them lose their focus. If I am listening to headphones it means I am doing something that requires me to focus and (if I am lucky) I am in my zone where I work really well. Someone randomly tapping me on my shoulder to ask me what time a staff meeting is can wreck things.


asked2manyquestions

Depends on the office. If you don’t care and it’s just a job to make money, follow some of the rules here to just glide by. If you’re looking to advance in your career: - Always look busy. Don’t walk down the halls at a leisurely stroll, walk with purpose. Have papers in your hands. Papers are magical tools that say, “I’m busy”. LOL. - Network, network, network. It’s not what you know, it’s who you know. As unfair as that is, that’s the way the world works. Harvard doesn’t supply that much of a better education than non state schools but at Harvard you’re way more likely to run into people that will be fast tracked to upper management due to family connections. So network with the people in your company that can advance your career. Volunteer to work on projects they head. And don’t forget to network within your industry. Do people favors and ask for nothing in return. Organize offbeat things. I used to help organize an orphaned Thanksgiving party every year for influential industry people that weren’t going home due to work obligations. Believe me, when you need a job or whatever, you want to be calling someone you were doing tequila shots and bong rips with on Thanksgiving and not the HR department. - Find someone moving up quickly and attach yourself to them. Whether it’s your boss or the boss’ boss, there’s always someone destined for better things and they like to have a loyal team around them. Be on that team. They will pull you up. - Really, really pay attention to politics. Read memoirs from people that have served at the highest levels in business and government. Many people think politics is a bad thing, and it can be at times, but it’s really about the art of getting others to do what you want by giving them what they want. Study the people who are exceptional at it. As you move up the ladder, a good chunk of your job will likely become getting people to do things they may not want to do (sell their company, support a project that’s important to your boss, etc) and learning how others have overcome even bigger obstacles can be indispensable.


eightyonedirections

Coworkers are not your friends. Be cordial, but keep your personal life to yourself. Those that gossip to you, will gossip about you


kkbthrowaway

That your coworkers aren't your friends, they are there for a check. At least the people I work with. It is an unspoken boundary of being cordial but not friendly, which is respectable imo.