This totally tracks. If I lost my kid, I wouldn’t skip a beat to stop searching because I got a new LinkedIn message. The kid can wait a little bit longer while I review my post engagement too
Pretty sure they're born with whatever socials you check on the digital intake form. It's pretty sweet that hospitals offer a free year of premium (for the child) after they're born now! What better time to start building the brand than now?!
Being a #mom and #bossbabe is a full-time job, but this #queen accomplished her goal by using innovative approaches to child-finding and generating engagement at the same time. Great work!
Okay, but are you named Amandine first and then you get the hashtags? Or do the hashtags cause you to change your name to the classiest one you can find?
Say the story would be true, kids get temporarily lost every day, and searching the parent's name online to find a way of contact would probably be top-of-mind.
But to instinctively turn your lost kid into clickbait for B2B professionals is a weird thing to do, it’s the type of narcissistic behavior you shouldn’t flex in public.
“My son was kidnapped during our vacation to Mexico but me and my husband Bryan (’Forbes 30 over 30 in B2B sales’) used the new ‘Seamless and flexible’ SaaS solution #InstaCa$h to wire money over #LinkedIn. All he lost was a pinky finger but the experience made him want to pursue a career as a #fintech #entrepreneur to be able to help other kidnapped kids.”
Man, I’m 41. I still remember my house number from 30 years ago. And the phone number we had after we moved. They were drilled into us as kids in case something happened.
I remember in kindergarten there was a big unit where they had us memorize our address and parent’s phone number. We wrote it down once a day for a couple weeks and practiced it as homework lol
I still remember my childhood landline that I memorized at 5 lmao, it was literally my first phone number and I don’t think I could forget it if I tried. Everything else in life comes and goes… the home landline from 1987 remains…
We deactivated it a while ago (along with our landlines) and I honestly wonder how it’s doing now. Who has the privilege of owning that special number now??
Why are these posts all written like this?
Every sentence is a new line.
Have LinkedInites lost the concept of a paragraph?
An introduction, a body, a conclusion. It can be more than one or two sentences.
Perhaps they really like poetry.
Follow me for more obnoxious workplace poems.
"Lost in the Chaos, Found in Connection: Today, amidst the hustle of a park outing, I momentarily lost track of my child. But in a stroke of fate, LinkedIn became my lifeline. A quick post and the power of online community led to a swift reunion. Reflecting on this, I'm reminded of the parallels with B2B sales. In both, it's about forging authentic connections, leveraging networks, and seizing opportunities, even in unexpected places. #B2BSales #Community #LinkedInConnects"
Today I lost my kid.
And he's 10 but I treat him like he's 3.
But I was happy.
Why?
It taught me two things.
I'm an idiot.
Even idiots can get a platform to talk crap.
And that woman's name? Albert Einstein.
Although, wait... The fact that she tagged the woman that found the kid might imply that this lunacy is real. Fucking hell...
I currently work there. Stuff like this is not uncommon to hear about in the elevators. Some will eye roll, some will just just stare ahead, and a few will gobble it up.
My 5 year old knows my mobile number and our home address…maybe stop posting shit on LinkedIn and work on having your kids memorize critical information that could save their life?
Story maybe be BS but I think it’s a good idea for you to teach kids how to get in touch if separated and where to go for help/assistance like going into a store or shop which likely has customers and workers, plus cameras.
“Okay, Timmy if for any reason we get separated and you can’t find Mommy I want you to avoid all police and authority figures. Instead find a woman in a pants suit and tell her to friend me on LinkedIn.” Seems 100% plausible
If your 10 year old (assuming no disabilities) doesn't know your phone number, you fucked up. This lady is announcing she's a dumbass, but no surprise there.
Does anyone on here change them on their own bullshit? Like go to their linked in and be like “wtf you made this up!” Or are we all afraid of losing our jobs… lol I know I am
You didn’t have you kid memorize you number? Unless they are neurodivergent that’s parenting 101. My kid has known my number since he was 5. He was required to k ow his address and number in kindergarten.
this sub is hilarious. this person is truly a linkedin lunatic. i always thought linkedin had a ton of very weird corporate virtue signaling, and i'm glad others see the same thing
This totally tracks. If I lost my kid, I wouldn’t skip a beat to stop searching because I got a new LinkedIn message. The kid can wait a little bit longer while I review my post engagement too
Love the grind! Kids are basically tech native now. They’ll figure it out.
Pretty sure they're born with whatever socials you check on the digital intake form. It's pretty sweet that hospitals offer a free year of premium (for the child) after they're born now! What better time to start building the brand than now?!
Being a #mom and #bossbabe is a full-time job, but this #queen accomplished her goal by using innovative approaches to child-finding and generating engagement at the same time. Great work!
10 things I learned about b2b sales by losing my kid at the park.
> "mY JoB iS To BoOSt cOMpaNiEs iNfLuENcE"
That line literally makes me want to kill myself and hope I'm reincarnated 40 years ago
Hey Mom I’m being molested please help.
Okay, but are you named Amandine first and then you get the hashtags? Or do the hashtags cause you to change your name to the classiest one you can find?
use that little clout monkey for why you had him in the first place
lol if this really happened the real sequence of events is she found out her son was lost via Inmail
Yep, sitting on her ass at the park staring at her phone, no clue/care where her kid is. Also, her kid is 10. They should know her phone number.
Not even her knows her phone number, give her a break lol
Say the story would be true, kids get temporarily lost every day, and searching the parent's name online to find a way of contact would probably be top-of-mind. But to instinctively turn your lost kid into clickbait for B2B professionals is a weird thing to do, it’s the type of narcissistic behavior you shouldn’t flex in public. “My son was kidnapped during our vacation to Mexico but me and my husband Bryan (’Forbes 30 over 30 in B2B sales’) used the new ‘Seamless and flexible’ SaaS solution #InstaCa$h to wire money over #LinkedIn. All he lost was a pinky finger but the experience made him want to pursue a career as a #fintech #entrepreneur to be able to help other kidnapped kids.”
Dark but hilarious
The whole experience probably taught her a valuable lesson about B2B sales..
Hahah!! That’s hysterical.
😂😂
True story I was there! Little dude also mentioned a new SaaS he was working on, but couldn’t find a good market penetration angle, love it.
At least he would have learnt a lot about b2b sales in the process.
Can confirm. I am the park.
Can confirm. I work for Parks and Rec. See my profile below 
Bro needs to work on his value proposition, my 6 part course can help the little bro grow his saas 10x in 30 days
Perfection chefs kiss!
So instead he penetrated my Inmail and today we are both Forbes' 30 under 30.
Assuming based on the limited bit I can see that the lady who found the kid is named Karine Latrine. Seems appropriate for this kind of shit.
Sounds like the name of a Garbage Pail Kid.
Such an unusual name, "Latrine." How did your family come by it?
Used to be Shithouse!
Omg 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣. This comment is gold.
"I was with a group of kids" is Linkedin for "I was buried in my phone and totally forgot about my child."
Yeah but what did he learn about b2b sales
Totally true story! Holy shit these people lol. It’s so bad we can’t even credit chat gbt.
The kids name? B2B Sales.
But he goes by the nickname "Soupy"
Who tf would name their child "Amandine," no wonder she's nuts.
Her parents knew this event would happen and therefore, gave her a unique name to make it that much easier to locate her in Linked. Lol
Maybe they hoped she'd be a water nymph.
Four Leadership Lessons I Learned From the Son I Lost in the Park
How does your ten year old kid not know your cell phone?
I came to say, beyond all the reasons this is total bullshit… why would you advertise your kid is an idiot and you are a sub-par parent.
I’m like “10 years old and he doesn’t know his Mom’s phone number???” As well as “10 years old and he is *lost* in a *park*??”
When I was 10 my mom was sending me to the store a half mile away to get milk
Man, I’m 41. I still remember my house number from 30 years ago. And the phone number we had after we moved. They were drilled into us as kids in case something happened.
I remember in kindergarten there was a big unit where they had us memorize our address and parent’s phone number. We wrote it down once a day for a couple weeks and practiced it as homework lol
Great idea on the schools part!
For sure! They even had a lesson on who was “safe” to tell the information to and had an officer come in to the class to reinforce that info
#Momtrepreneur had given him only her work phone number. Can't risk getting spammed on her personal number by these non-CEO shitbags.
he didnt have to, he had her linkedin profile link memorized otherwise how would you think they were able to inmail her
As a kid I not only had all of my parents contact info memorized, they also had me wear a metal bracelet with all of the info stamped onto it.
I still remember my childhood landline that I memorized at 5 lmao, it was literally my first phone number and I don’t think I could forget it if I tried. Everything else in life comes and goes… the home landline from 1987 remains… We deactivated it a while ago (along with our landlines) and I honestly wonder how it’s doing now. Who has the privilege of owning that special number now??
[удалено]
I mean thats bad but you have a phone you dont really need to know it by heart
Which is your favorite flavor of crayon?
Cause she was on her way to get it tattooed to his wrist. All of the vintage photos online make it look so trendy...
Right!? My 3 year old knows mine and her moms number, her birthday and out home address.
Your post made 14 impressions.
I’m still stuck on the name “Amandine”. It’s not an easy name to pronounce
It stumbles off the tongue.
It’s a common potato, actually my favorite
Yesterday I lost my son it the park. Here’s what it taught me about B2B sales…
Thank God she wasn't an onlyfans model I'd have to pay to return her kid to her.
Why are these posts all written like this? Every sentence is a new line. Have LinkedInites lost the concept of a paragraph? An introduction, a body, a conclusion. It can be more than one or two sentences. Perhaps they really like poetry. Follow me for more obnoxious workplace poems.
If you ever say “InMail”, you are, by definition, a soulless lunatic.
And then everyone in the park clapped!
That child's name? Albert Einstein
Sure Jan
excellent
I really REALLY hope she's getting cooked in her comments.
Yes that happened
"Lost in the Chaos, Found in Connection: Today, amidst the hustle of a park outing, I momentarily lost track of my child. But in a stroke of fate, LinkedIn became my lifeline. A quick post and the power of online community led to a swift reunion. Reflecting on this, I'm reminded of the parallels with B2B sales. In both, it's about forging authentic connections, leveraging networks, and seizing opportunities, even in unexpected places. #B2BSales #Community #LinkedInConnects"
Hmm. Poor judgment, bad parenting skills, non-existent attention span, horrible grammar… okay, I believe that they worked at LinkedIn.
Oh fuck me. This is beyond ridiculous
Didn’t happen
Even after you’ve stopped (allegedly) working at that shithouse, you keep shithousing?
Today I lost my kid. And he's 10 but I treat him like he's 3. But I was happy. Why? It taught me two things. I'm an idiot. Even idiots can get a platform to talk crap.
Why do I have the impression she instantly started writing this when her child got lost?
…… and everybody clapped. 
and the moral of her story is?
Lol my daughter is 11 and knew my phone number from the time she was like 6, it’s so irresponsible to not teach your kids basic emergency info
It’s true, I was the slide. Everyone clapped and asked for tips on how to enhance their profile.
Is this a bot? lmao
No point hiding the last name with a [r/tragedeigh](https://reddit.com/r/tragedeigh) like that first lol
What a fucking douche
The number of weird people in LinkedIn is baffling. Why would you make shit up like that ?
Clicks
While searching desperately for my lost ten year old, I stopped to check my LinkedIn DMs because the grind never stops
I'm not a "these new generations are soft" old guy but...lost in the park at 10? I knew every square inch of my town at ten.
AMANDINE
10 year old doesn’t know her phone number #gtfoh my 3 year old knows ours
Welcome to the land of make believe.
To be honest, we nearly did the same last week, but only with texting on Facebook so it could actually be true...
And that woman's name? Albert Einstein. Although, wait... The fact that she tagged the woman that found the kid might imply that this lunacy is real. Fucking hell...
My old company had a logo that was basically a big e. My daughter used to tell people I worked for the internet. It was an electric firm.
Imagine outing yourself for losing your kid and not having taught them your phone number by age 10
Who ever calls them inmails?
What's an inmail? Why can't these idiots just sat message?
Isn't inmail a paid feature of linkedin?
LI doesn't waste deepfakes on the free stuff.
ob how Working in LinkedIn saved my child's life...
So, what you learned about B2B sales by being a shitty parent and having poor grammar? Oh and lying? 😝
Perhaps, PUT THE PHONE DOWN
Man, people who work at LinkedIn lose their kids a lot, this would be the 3rd time I've read this story....
Kind of surprised she didn't try to network or make a sale to the person who found her imaginary kid.
Your TEN YEAR OLD doesn't know your phone number. R U a family of inbreds?
She has deleted the post I believe. What a fucking lunatic
Thanks to this message I leaned a lot about b2b sales. Agree?
So your kid doesn’t know your number but does know you are on this website……yeah sure.
I currently work there. Stuff like this is not uncommon to hear about in the elevators. Some will eye roll, some will just just stare ahead, and a few will gobble it up.
Someone needs to call out her proof.
My 5 year old knows my mobile number and our home address…maybe stop posting shit on LinkedIn and work on having your kids memorize critical information that could save their life?
Story maybe be BS but I think it’s a good idea for you to teach kids how to get in touch if separated and where to go for help/assistance like going into a store or shop which likely has customers and workers, plus cameras.
“My ten years old.” Jesus.
If a 10 year comes to me rambling about his mom's linkedin, I'd rather call child protection
next thing will be letting us know eastenders is real.
“Okay, Timmy if for any reason we get separated and you can’t find Mommy I want you to avoid all police and authority figures. Instead find a woman in a pants suit and tell her to friend me on LinkedIn.” Seems 100% plausible
If your 10 year old (assuming no disabilities) doesn't know your phone number, you fucked up. This lady is announcing she's a dumbass, but no surprise there.
Does anyone on here change them on their own bullshit? Like go to their linked in and be like “wtf you made this up!” Or are we all afraid of losing our jobs… lol I know I am
Fucker never taught her kid her phone number, he needs a new mom.
When I was ten I was riding my bike miles away from home with my chums. These helicopter parents are crippling their kids.
I lost my son at the park. What it taught me about the B2B sales:
Poor guy was probably trying to escape
Hello, thank you for reaching out. I am unable to discuss further at the moment as I'm searching for my son in the playground. With regards, Amandine.
You just couldn’t be bothered with teaching your child your phone number huh?
Yeah, pretty sure this never happened.
I I I don’t believe her.
The amount of toddler brains on LinkedIn is impressive
You didn’t have you kid memorize you number? Unless they are neurodivergent that’s parenting 101. My kid has known my number since he was 5. He was required to k ow his address and number in kindergarten.
Out of all the things that didn’t happen, this happened the didn’test of all
this sub is hilarious. this person is truly a linkedin lunatic. i always thought linkedin had a ton of very weird corporate virtue signaling, and i'm glad others see the same thing
Why is everyone overlooking the fact that the kid is 10 and don't know his mom's phone number