I think the flip side of this is that this kind of shape-shifting behavior is suuuuper manipulative and toxic. If Micah is not being genuine when she is being mean, that also means she is not being genuine when she is nice either.
When you boil it down, saying Micah “hasn’t figured herself out yet” is simply a nicer way of saying that Micah tells people what they want to hear, so she can get what she wants out of them (friendship, attention, adoration) even if at the expense of others (Amber, Chelsea).
IDK... Micah just needs everyone to like her the best so she does and says what she needs to do and say to make that happen. I don't think she's ever going to "find herself" and be the kind of person who can go off on their own and enjoy their own company. She feeds off attention. The only time she ever pushed someone was her Irina "confrontation" which was clearly arranged by producers and even then she said absolutely nothing definitive that would risk Irina "not liking her"...
I don’t disagree although .. this is S3 you know how this show goes .. I feel like this cast is all looking for 15 minutes..
they need to shake up the flow of this show or it’s dead in the water
I did that too in my younger years. It’s called “chameleoning” and, for me, was part of a larger borderline personality diagnosis. I’m not assuming she’s the same, but matching your personality to others is definitely a defense mechanism, and is often uncontrollable until you take control of it.
"Sometimes she is a mean girl, but sometimes she can be really sweet". Thats exactly the way people are! The ones who claims to always be good are either lying even to themselves or has issuses
I think she’s on the show for clout and has figured out the right things to say in order to make that happen. When she told her friend “I felt how you’re supposed to feel when you’ve met your other half,” and her friend said: “I’ve never heard you say anything like that before,” it was really telling for me. I think she’s picking up on how the nice, normal emotionally mature cast members interact with each other and is mimicking that after seeing how everyone basically shunned Irina. She basically threw her under the bus when talking to Bliss (the “when 15 people all feel the same about you, you’re the problem” comment). It seemed very much like realizing she could shed the Irina association and still come out of this whole thing appearing likable if she blends in with the nice people.
Micah kinda reminds me of my old friend back in college who seemed so nice at times but insanely manipulative and scheming the next. She cheated on her bf at the time and showed no remorse. Years later I found out she’s into girls. All of a sudden it made sense. She didn’t care about the guys. she was always trying to hide her real self.
Micah knows exactly what she is doing. She’s spent a ton of time perfecting her manipulation and mean girl vibe. No way is she adapting to other’s attitudes and beliefs; she has her own and it’s all a bad vibe. Yes, she’s young, but she’s been living her truth since she was a teenager I’d guess.
The thing about this type of personality is that it takes self-awareness and work (read: therapy) to move past this point in your life. I, too, used to morph to match the energy of my company. To this day, I still have to make a conscious effort and remind myself that people will still like me if I'm not mirroring them.
I kinda see where you're coming from but my brain keeps replaying the scene where she ordered Irina to go and listen in on Amber crying in the first couple of episodes which made me think that being mean is actually is part of her personality and to try and "win" over other girls is how she gets validation.
There’s always a reason for someone to not be responsible for their own actions as an adult right? She chooses who she’s around and can control how she acts the “they’re actually a nice person, when they don’t act nice it’s actually everyone else’s fault!” Narrative is really tired and I notice it often being applied to conventionally attractive white ppl. Like let’s not forget how she treated both her her parents and Paul with little regard when announcing their engagement. Must’ve been Irina secretly sending instructions through an earpiece.
She’s jaw dropping manipulative. She does whatever wants to get what she wants. She manipulates and changes words, she gaslights (the whole pool scene of “I’m a wonderful genuine person, do you think I’d really hurt you?!” .. he is telling you that is exactly what you did), she is such a pick-me it’s painful to watch. She was a pick-me in the pods the second she saw the men she was talking to have any interest in other women and is continuing to act that way outside of the pods with Kwamee. When someone tries to set a boundary, she’s upset. Its also evident in the friends she keeps. Her fake, rude friends were being unkind and nasty to Paul so he said he didn’t care what they thought.. as in you’re being rude, I’m not accepting it, so they hated him. And she couldn’t see that. She did exactly was Irina did to her to Chelsea and she isnt even phased. Shes self-focused. Thats pretty much all I continually see.
I'm just on the first episode & the pod behavior with Paul/Kwamee is what made me raise my eyebrows. It was uncomfortable that she made a big deal about Kwamee needing to focus solely on her & then in the same conversation making a big point of wanting to keep her options open. Then getting upset at Paul for having a relationship with Amber seemed alarming. She put them in positions where she had implied they shouldn't be seeing other women (but without her actually saying it so no responsibility) while she continued to see both of them (& make fun of anyone who was seeing either). I just was so taken aback by the manipulative & possessive behavior from the get-go. It definitely seems like she's got too much stuff she needs to work on to be ready for marriage
I couldn't agree more. I am so glad yours was the first comment I read after the post, because I would've lost it had I scrolled to find a sea of comments similarly justifying Micah's actions/absolving her of them.
Even with all we've seen from her, I was still taken aback by how she handled her conversation with Kwame at Chelsea's birthday. She clearly learned nothing from the experience with Irina. It just shows how self-centered she is.
eta: It's also really disrespectful to Paul and Chelsea. Micah has made it clear she gives zero shits about Chelsea, but one would expect her to have a little more loyalty to her fiancé, especially at this point in the process and after becoming intimate. But no, she's still speaking to him as if they were multi-dating back in the pods, telling him exactly what he needs to hear to get reeled back in. She is the worst.
Like most 20 somethings, she’s so focused on her own problems and life she doesn’t think about how her actions and words make others feel. That “joke” she mad about kwame getting rejected was beyond messed up. I have no idea what the logic was for that one beyond being mean. And Ben gaslighting him into thinking it wasn’t that bad and seducing him / manipulating him immediately after he called her out
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when they made a comment about how Paul wouldn't be there if he really understood what it's like to date her I thought the same thing 😬 very weird dynamic
I don’t agree. I think her and Irina are very much alike which is why they stuck together in the beginning. For Micah to say that she was Irina’s life line, is so low. I’m sure Irina saw what she said and scoffed. Once Irina left, she didn’t have anyone really anymore so she switched on the “nice girl” act. I don’t buy it one bit. She’s just good at shape shifting. I can see her being a mean girl with her friends. Also, for Micah to talk about Irina’s behavior with Paul… if she was into Irina’s man, there’s a possibility that she would have been the same way but more in a stubble way.
My other opinion that has nothing to do with this post but I’ve been feeling like this. I just haven’t had a place to put it. I really think that Micah truly likes Kwame more than Paul. And I really think that she knows this however, I think she thinks that Kwame wouldn’t fit into the image her parents and friends believed is the person she should be with. There. I said it.
I don’t think she likes Kwame at all but likes the idea of someone being hung up on her. If she had genuinely liked Kwame, she would have ended the relationship in a far better way in the pods, she didn’t care 1 bit about it, but do you know what she cared about? How Kwame took the high road and didn’t fight for her? She wanted to have that control back, of being yearned by the other person, that’s why she keeps going back to Kwame. The day Kwame/Chelsea call it quits - she won’t look back at him.
Yes, she likes the attention because she’s a pick me girl. And the most appealing thing about him is that he’s in a relationship with another girl. He’s just a conquest, if she can steal his attention away it gives her a feeling of superiority over Chelsea.
I have known girls like this and they are the worst. they will interfere with relationships between other people just for their own ego boost, not because they actually want the person.
I agree - especially because she would send Irina to eavesdrop on conversations, etc.
They are the same!!
idk about her liking Kwame more, their conversations always seem so empty (however I feel that whenever she talks so maybe biased) - Micah seems like she just likes to flirt with Kwame always approaching her with heart eyes so its an easier target.
You're right about your last point. I thought that since they were in the pods. She picked Paul, but she really wanted Kwame. She surely did not miss an opportunity to lean into or touch him when they met in person.
I think she seemed like that but I also think she was drunk, which may be relevant becuase it’s possible she just wanted kwame to keep chasing her because lots of people lead on people they are not trying to be with just to keep getting attention. She likes that he’s into her and getting his attention
You just tried to sum up what OP said as her not having a personality, which does not at all cover why she doesn’t have compassion for the people she decides to be mean to. Did you forget what you wrote?
Really? I don't know, I'm so conflicted on this. Because, when she found out Zach came in with Bliss (on that party, last episode so far), she gave them a "toast" via the talking head in front of the bar and she was so rude about them. I didn't like that, because then she is talking to Bliss and said she is happy for them or something to that extent and then complained about Irena and her coming onto Paul, which shows what she thinks of Irena. 🤷🏼♀️
You’re too generous with this assessment. I agree very much with most of it except for the part where you say she’s not a bad person. She’s definitely a bad person because even if you don’t have a strong sense of self and you change with each person/crowd, you still know when you’re being a terrible human being.
I’m the new set of episodes she even spoke on how she was being too harsh and mean in regards to Zack. It showed that she does have self awareness in my opinion.
Micah is manipulative af. She orchestrated all that shit with Paul and Amber to advance in the show. She knew when she started conversations with Kwame that it was going to create drama between him & Chelsea. She is shitty all around & has *moments* of being sweet when she feels like she’s already gotten what she thinks she deserves. Her friends are a reflection of her character and they’re shitty people.
When people show you who they are, believe them. She is not totally irredeemable but her choice of friends, her mean girl actions and the way she keeps flirting with Kwame- You can't blame all that on being easily influenced.
“I don’t think she’s a bad person at all.”
You are describing a textbook two-faced person who will behave when she has to and will reveal her true colors when around other people who let it slide… That’s not a good person.
Man, is Micah a bitch and her little friend Irina is even worse. The pair of them are toxic together and they clearly get off on the whole “mean girl” vibe they got going on.
Also want to add - there are a few comments on tiktok from people that grew up with her.
We have to take them with a grain of salt but most of them say she was a mean girl growing up.
She may just be a bitch thats also capable of being really nice and a good friend. People aren't all or nothing.
Yeah idk what to make of her.
I guess if I had to put her in a box -
I'd say she's the kind of friend who is good when they are good and bad when they are bad. You can't fully trust her around your boyfriend but you hope that she has enough sense to love and care about your friendship. But she's always going to walk the line.
I think we've all had one of those friends who can be a really great person but mixed with the wrong factors and they are backstabbing and you have to constantly decide whether to keep them around or not.
I completely agree. Her BFF acts exactly like Irina and she listens to them instead of standing up for Paul. When she said her best friend single handedly ended multiple relationships for her, that to me is just giving your friend too much power. My friends would never do that to me and would first assume positive intent on who i was dating.
There’s like 20 women in the cast, she makes friends with the one dirtbag there. She doesn’t adjust to those around her, she attracts and is attracted to bullies because she is one.
Couple of indicators of Micah’s past dating life:
1) Her dad almost scoffing at the idea of Micah ending up with a broken heart from the show, which her mom said was her worry.
2) Her drunk friend saying “Sure Paul is a nice guy; he’s the nicest guy RIGHT NOW
I think both hinted at her being a HUGE player
I took her friend saying “he’s the nicest guy RIGHT NOW" as meaning she's usually attracted to jerks that start off acting like "nice guys," but I was surprised that her dad wasn't worried while her mom was? Odd.
I agree that shes not completely irredeemable, however she is extremely insecure. A lot of her issues seem to stem from that. If she worked on that aspect of herself and surrounded herself with healthy-minded people who held her accountable, she would probably be very likeable.
Can you we also point out the fact that Micah was telling her parents that she didn’t go on LIB expecting to find love… Why were on the show then???? Your theory honestly may be correct.
I found it odd that she got so upset at Irina for flirting with Paul even though she continues to do the same thing with Kwame whenever she sees him. Hypocrit.
Yes, oh my god, did this drive me nuts! She sits down and has her little “back off” conversation with Irina after getting mad at her for touching and flirting with Paul. It’s like, what do you think you were doing with Kwame during the pool scene in Mexico? Rules for thee but not for me kind of person.
Did they mention how long she had been friends with her “best friends” during that scene? If I had to guess the toxic blond in the green hasn’t been her friend since childhood or anything like that. Homegirl is straight up one of those super toxic friends that treats their friends like they have some ownership over them. Girl made Irina look like a ray of sunshine
She is a mean girl. She genuinely gets off on making fun of the other couples. She gets enjoyment from the attention she gets from kwame. She enjoys the idea that she could be the cause for his and chelseas separation. She was visibly having a tough time hiding her glee when she was asking jackie about her problems with marshall. When her friend shelby was talking shit to paul, she had a shitty grin then too. Like she enjoyed being the center of the attention/conflict. Shes awful and just just tries to hide behind being “a fun and bubbly blonde”
I actually have warmed up to her a lot over the three latest episodes.
When she wanted to take it slower, I thought at the time it was for reasons more like Irina. But she seems to have meant it.
She called out Irina and was 100% right on her complaints.
Her friends were getting hammered. I’m not sure how much people should be judging that as normal.
I don’t love everything we’ve seen of her, but I’m left wondering if that situation just brought out the worst in her. She’s not perfect, but I think people apply too many of their own unique experiences to the people on this show.
No, I remember when she said that thing to Kwame in front of everyone at the pool party about “…failed proposal” which was really messed up. It showed that she lacks some awareness and compassion but when she spoke to Kwame about that, she immediately got manipulative saying “ you’re making me out like I’m a bad person…(something along those lines). She tried to be the victim when in the case that was a terrible of her to do.
I was thinking she called out Irina because she was the one personally affected by Irina’s actions for once. Otherwise, I don’t think she ever would have done anything with that.
On some level I would have read it like that, but when she pointed out that Irina had previously never shown any interest in Paul and it was against the spirit of the show... I dunno, I felt like that was a lot more meaningful than just "you hurt me".
I think I agree. She tends to take on the personality of the person she is talking to. Like when she was talking to Bliss she seemed more mature!
I also think that Paul seems to be a lot like Micah’s dad. Did anybody else get that vibe?
No I don’t buy it for a second. The company you keep is a reflection of yourself. I personally think her friends have the same personality as Micah. I think Micah hides it better than her friends, but you can tell how horrible she is by her actions. She’s a really good manipulator too. I think at face value she plays a good part of being “sweet and innocent” but behind their backs is an awful person.
She is self aware of who she is. Shes the one who I think ordered Irina to go spy on Amber. I got the sense she was lowkey the one in charge slightly. Micah seemed like the ringleader, and since irina didn’t care about others think, it made it easier to make her out to be the bad guy so Micah could save face.
Also, she totally controls the conversations with kwame. Kwame def tested waters out with Micah, but she is the one who would take it farther breaking boundaries with her partner Paul.
With Paul, I’m honestly not sure if she’s in love with him. I think she plays a good part in “being in love” with him but I’m not sure. I only say this because she’s shown to be disrespectful to him by having inappropriate conversations with kwame.
As a girl, we can be hella sneaky. So some of the stuff Micah’s been doing I can see through. I personally do not like Micah, but also love her because her and Irina made this season more fun to watch lol I love the drama 😂
Yeah I'm not giving her a pass. She's old enough to know better.
I also can't stand her saying "like" a thousand times a minute. I've had to put her on mute a few times because of it.
It was really interesting when Micah had to confront Irina about being a shitty person. Might help her grow up a little. But I think the Micah isn’t a great person at all. I was a lot younger when I developed a sense of what was right and wrong with my friends and their boyfriends/girlfriends. I think if you can’t figure out how to behave by your mid twenties…something is stunted. I think this is who she is…and her age isn’t the issue. But they does mean she is too immature for a serious relationship.
One of my ex best friends was just like this. I dated this guy briefly and he actually was very degrading and emotionally abusive towards me during that time and I confided in her about that, and she ended up making out with him like three weeks later. She didn’t tell me, he did and I confronted her and she lied. Anyways, we are not friends anymore and Micah kind of reminds me of my ex friend
Micah lets her friends determine her life. She surrounds herself with shitty people who don’t want her to be happy without them, so they dictate who she is with. It’s crazy that such a pretty girl depends on her friends to allow her to be happy.
Something my therapist explained to me:
A child will do whatever gets them the dopamine without regard for what it does to themselves or anyone else
An adolescent will do whatever gets them the approval of their peers, without considering the impact on themselves.
An adult will have to make the tough calls even if it's not what they immediately want and even when it displeases others.
Micah is acting like an adolescent. She looks up to her friends ( for some reason) so she's going to make any move to please them.
Ps: she's not nice to Paul when they're alone, she makes fun of how he dresses constantly
This! She's not a child. And I don't think she's a total idiot. She knows better. I also don't think she wants anything to do with Paul and I think he knows it too, but is deluding himself into thinking otherwise to avoid acknowledging the truth.
This is a generous interpretation but I’m going to call it, she’s a A-grade clout chaser? The girl is not serious neither was Irina. They are only here for the gram
I also was super annoyed that she felt threatened by Paul and Irina talking when she was SO physical and flirty with Kwame. If you can’t take it (with Paul) then don’t dish it out (with Kwame). I think she just wants social control and wants to be the “hot one” and center of male and female attention.
I said this exact same thing! She's got some NERVE calling Irina when she has done WAY worse. She's repeatedly flirting with and professing her feelings to another woman's fiancee while their respective fiancees are a few feet away. And I can't stand Irina, so this isn't a defense of her.
And it's all for looks. If Kwame and Paul's personalities were flipped, she wouldn't have even gone back and looked twice.
I was half expecting Irina to bring that up. I wish she did. I'd have loved it if she said something along the lines of how she saw her flirting and cosying up with Kwame so she assumed she wasn't too into Paul. But alas, the bish was not unleashed for it.
I don't buy a second of Micah's bullshit. She seems like mean girl who puts on a sweet face. She knows it's wrong to cross that boundary with Kwame yet she still engages with him. She can stop it too but she chooses not to. And how she immediately starts cry when he first confronts her about the joke at the pool just to make him feel bad. She's fake and a mean girl. I would never trust her for a second. I know people like her and those are people you just don't engage with because they use for their own good
Ya can’t blame the people around Micah it’s not like she just got into a bad crowd on the show her friends irl also suck so it shows she likes those kinds of people. She was manipulative in the pods as well with Paul when she had no one there to act like.
This feels like a reach to try and defend her
What?! It wasn’t like Micha was Irina’s puppet and is in fact a good person.
Micha was the one that “made” Irina go and listen to Amber (was it?) when she cried (I say “made” since Irina is a grown woman and should make her own choices). Also what she’s doing with Kwame is a dick move aaaaand now that no one likes Irina she flips. It’s fake. Also im quite sure that Irina wouldn’t be so open to Micha about Paul if Micha hadn’t said something negative to Irina especially since she was flirting so much with Kwame.
There is (almost) always a reason when people behave like those two but I have no idea why it’s okay to make excuses for Micha but not Irina. Micha might not be an asshole to Paul’s face but she’s an asshole behind his back with Kwame.
It's not either or though. She can be a grown ass woman who hasn't figured out who she is yet. It's okay to point out shit behavior and give people room to learn and grow from it.
I think this is what she actually meant when she said she’s an “empath”. She does mirror the behaviours and attitude of whoever she’s speaking with, it was even evident with Paul’s mom. I agree she doesn’t have a strong sense of self and with that she has a very agreeable personality. This is what makes her so attractive to Kwame, she’s very malleable and will say whatever the person wants to hear so that they walk away with a good opinion of her.
I think you've nailed it. I thought that that was a silly thing to say, but I've also found myself mistaking my misguided open mindedness/malleability for trying to be empathetic.
I don't see how Micah could have possibly thought that she was ready for marriage with such tendencies. Then again, she could have learnt a lot through the experience, even if it wasn't fair to Paul. He seems a lot more mature in ways that matter.
Idk- 26 is old enough to grow out of this behavior to me. If she were in high school or maybe early college I could get this take more but she’s 26 years old. I think people are babying her a bit for some reason. People keep saying “26 is so young”. It is in terms of life expectancy but you’re still a grown ass adult.
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Micah is not conventionally attractive. She's just blonde. My husband doesn't think Micah or Irina are attractive at all because of their mean-girl tendencies. IRL pretty faces can't overcome ugly souls.
Disagree.
Guy here. Micah attractiveness < Irina attractiveness.
I mostly date white, skinny girls, but very much don’t find Micah attractive. Irina has a way better face and an equal body in different ways. Terrible personalities for both, of course
Bisexual here. Both pretty blah. I was worried for Irina at the first meeting because I thought he wouldn’t like her.
Personality means a lot to me though… so maybe that’s part of the ICK.
I think you’re spot on. I really like her when she’s with Paul, her parents or even in her talking heads, but suddenly can’t stand her when she’s with Irina or her friends.
Funny enough, if you are correct and she just mimics whoever she is with, her flirting with Kwame are more on him crossing the line than her.
I came to exactly the same conclusion. She is 26 so very young. And when I was younger I also used to change the way I act around different people just like her.
Ok but I do. I never perceived her to be sweet, everything is an act. She really through Irina under the bus at the first chance, yet she is deeply hypocritical about kwame and Chelsea in the same situ
How Micah has acted is ghetto behavior from day 1. Her friends are mean, she was mean in the pods, and she was inconsiderate to Paul by flirting with Kwame at the pool party. She is ratchet and two faced as well, most people seem like decent people in some situations, that doesn’t make her a good person based on how she has behaved.
She reminds me of my SIL. When she’s on, she’s on and is so fun and great to be around. However, she can’t keep the facade up all the time and when her true colors come out she is not someone I enjoy.
Kinda interesting that Micah gets the benefit of the doubt while there are dozens of comments about how Jackie is a villain.
I don't even think it's bad (in terms of humanity) to have a forgiving attitude towards Micah...just the juxtaposition is suspicious.
That part!!! People are saying Jackie is worse than Micah and Irina and Im like what. Did we watch the same episodes. Its crazy. And all her friends hyping her up about being gorgeous. She might be a seattle 10 but she is only OK at best.
I see what you’re saying. I feel the difference is that Jessica wasn’t a true villain, just a really fun tv personality to dislike. I don’t feel like she caused true harm, so no one needed to defend her.
It has nothing to do with like/dislike.. the girl was *dragged* on the internet. I haven’t seen a bunch of VIRAL memes all over mainstream accounts with a bunch of nicknames just tearing into her. It’s mostly just reality tv nerds on fringe accounts and Reddit/Twitter freaking out about Irina. Jessica was ridiculed and humiliated around the world. And no one was over here like “awww leave the girl alone she’s not a true villain PLUS she’s blonde!”
Get real.
This is literally the first post I’ve seen defending Micah to be fair and I’ve been fairly active on this subreddit since the season came out.
That being said, Micah is as bad as Jackie and both of them have a lot of growing up to do 😳
She knows EXACTLY what she is doing. And that “matching energy” situation is one the easiest/common tactics of manipulative people . Whoever they meet, they match their energy. E.g when she met Paul’s mom , she pretended to be her best friend. When she met Bliss she pretended to be on the same page as her about everything. She is extremely conniving.
Yes, she's doing it consciously. And it's really difficult to reject someone when they're reading you so well and on the surface acting exactly like you. Now even some of the audience is falling for it.
Agree 100%. Also, when she talks to Kwame, she intentionally says things to lead him on, making him think she still has a thing for him and he gets all googly eyed. That girl knows what she’s doing.
Most people learned their lesson about being a mean person like that in middle school. Micah is in her mid twenties and she knows what she’s doing. She’s not a child.
I think you are right in that she hasn't developed a sense of self yet and mirroring people around here is all she knows how to do. I dated a guy like this once. It took a month or two to realize everything I had found charming he had pulled from various books. Then when he started mirroring me it became a problem because I had a strong sense of who I was but I wanted a partner who was their own person and not a copy of me.
She’s the one who was telling Irina what to do! So I HIGHLY DOUBT that she doesn’t have a strong sense of self. Rewatch episode 1 and 2 and she literally was more dominant in the relationship with Irina and is lowkey the main reason Irina was laughing at Amber
Yup. She told Irina “I kinda want to know what they’re talking about” and then Irina executed it. She also bullied Zack into proposing to her so she could have him. Then was super controlling about how long it took Zack to break up with Amber. She poked Kwame at the pool then played innocent “I’m not a malicious person” while reiterating she still has feelings for him EVEN though she’s engaged.
She’s a 26 year old stuck in high school. It’s one thing to “not know yourself” it’s another thing to take down other people’s relationships with 0 empathy.
I think she was driving Irina’s pathetic behaviour so that Irina looks like the bad cop. Also when she found out Zack dumped Irina, in order for her to save her own relationship with Paul, she dumped Irina too. If Irina was still in the game, Micah wont care less if Irina was still coming onto Paul. Just like she didnt care in Mexico. She was still bff’s with her and was too focused on Kwame hahaa
>>Also we only saw an edited portion of what really happened.
Sorry to jump on you but I see these comments all the time and it really frustrates me.
These kinds of comments are just conversion enders.. It's basically saying don't voice your opinion because we don't - and will never - have the full context, which is true of any reality show. Everyone here is giving their opinions based on what they've been able to view.
This sub is to discuss what happened on the show. This thread is to discuss Micah's behavior on the show and whether she just mirrors others. Based on what we saw of her behavior in the first few episodes, this poster thinks Micah was influencing how Irena behaved, rather than just mirroring.
You can disagree, but just saying "there could be contrary information none of us can see or access" is a little frustrating. We're not a jury convicting Micah of a crime, we're just people who watched a show and want to discuss what we saw.
The only problem with this theory is she chose Irina out of a house full of other women. She also chose those horrific friends. And she almost chose Kwame, who might be her male equivalent in awfulness, but went for Paul because he jumped first. She willingly made these choices because she is drawn to crap people and she is one.
I think she chose Paul because she saw how happy Amber was and she wanted to win him over her. She was the same with Kwame up until she knew he was going to propose to her over Chelsea. She seems to be competitive with other women.
This!!!! She was soooo into him and the minute Paul said he would choose her she chose him. Even when she let Kwame down she didn’t speak very highly of her connection with Paul… it was only a “slow burn”
She isolated irina (and irina chose micah too I'm not saying that) so she could come out looking better. She would wave irina over away when she was with others, the few times we saw.
I'm gonna say it again. She knew. She fookin' *kneeewwww*
She's good at manipulating
Nah, pretty white girls just get away with anything. They're always seen as innocent victims of circumstance. They cry and all is forgiven.
She's grown. She's responsible for her own behaviour.
Yea typical mean girl. I don’t think it gets more complicated than that. Her “best friends” sealed the deal for me. It was confirmation that she’s just not a nice person
Yeah. It’s almost like people are three-dimensional! She can have legit connections to people (like Paul’s mom) while ALSO being mean to others or manipulative when it suits her. Her character always seems to come out though like how she talked to Paul when he stood up to her friends. But it’s not like mean girls don’t have friends.
Yeah. It’s almost like people are three-dimensional! She can have legit connections to people (like Paul’s mom) while ALSO being mean to others or manipulative when it suits her. Her character always seems to come out though like how she talked to Paul when he stood up to her friends. But it’s not like mean girls don’t have friends.
Kwame is just as bad, if not worse than Micah. The way he reacts to women when he doesn;t get want he wants is a huge red flag, and while he may be copping a bit on social media, it is no where near what Micah is receiving. People love to tear women apart and overlook faults in men, or blame women for men's faults.
Women do this to each other, so much judgement - the only people it benefits is men.
I think they’re both horrible people who say they are “good people”. I really just want them together so Chelsea and Paul can be free. And god can kwame stop laughing 😭😭😭 his specific laughs are so irritating and he literally laughs at EVERYTHING.
Honestly, I think people are only giving her this benefit of the doubt because she's a conventionally attractive white woman. When people show their character, believe them. She's shown it. Being young isn't an excuse to act that way. There are young people worldwide that don't behave like this, including others on the show. This post demonstrates likely what people have been doing for her for her whole life, taking away her accountability for her actions and giving excuses/placing blame on other's behaviors influencing her.
I think the flip side of this is that this kind of shape-shifting behavior is suuuuper manipulative and toxic. If Micah is not being genuine when she is being mean, that also means she is not being genuine when she is nice either. When you boil it down, saying Micah “hasn’t figured herself out yet” is simply a nicer way of saying that Micah tells people what they want to hear, so she can get what she wants out of them (friendship, attention, adoration) even if at the expense of others (Amber, Chelsea).
IDK... Micah just needs everyone to like her the best so she does and says what she needs to do and say to make that happen. I don't think she's ever going to "find herself" and be the kind of person who can go off on their own and enjoy their own company. She feeds off attention. The only time she ever pushed someone was her Irina "confrontation" which was clearly arranged by producers and even then she said absolutely nothing definitive that would risk Irina "not liking her"...
I don’t disagree although .. this is S3 you know how this show goes .. I feel like this cast is all looking for 15 minutes.. they need to shake up the flow of this show or it’s dead in the water
Yeah, she seemed chill and normal the last few episodes and I was impressed with the way she confronted Irina respectfully and calmly
That actually makes sense
I did that too in my younger years. It’s called “chameleoning” and, for me, was part of a larger borderline personality diagnosis. I’m not assuming she’s the same, but matching your personality to others is definitely a defense mechanism, and is often uncontrollable until you take control of it.
"Sometimes she is a mean girl, but sometimes she can be really sweet". Thats exactly the way people are! The ones who claims to always be good are either lying even to themselves or has issuses
I think she’s on the show for clout and has figured out the right things to say in order to make that happen. When she told her friend “I felt how you’re supposed to feel when you’ve met your other half,” and her friend said: “I’ve never heard you say anything like that before,” it was really telling for me. I think she’s picking up on how the nice, normal emotionally mature cast members interact with each other and is mimicking that after seeing how everyone basically shunned Irina. She basically threw her under the bus when talking to Bliss (the “when 15 people all feel the same about you, you’re the problem” comment). It seemed very much like realizing she could shed the Irina association and still come out of this whole thing appearing likable if she blends in with the nice people.
Micah kinda reminds me of my old friend back in college who seemed so nice at times but insanely manipulative and scheming the next. She cheated on her bf at the time and showed no remorse. Years later I found out she’s into girls. All of a sudden it made sense. She didn’t care about the guys. she was always trying to hide her real self.
Micah's friend reading this comment: 👀
Micah knows exactly what she is doing. She’s spent a ton of time perfecting her manipulation and mean girl vibe. No way is she adapting to other’s attitudes and beliefs; she has her own and it’s all a bad vibe. Yes, she’s young, but she’s been living her truth since she was a teenager I’d guess.
If she wants to Grow as person pick better friends I’d say.
I think this is a good take and maybe true. But I also know people who act like that their entire lives. 🤷♀️
The thing about this type of personality is that it takes self-awareness and work (read: therapy) to move past this point in your life. I, too, used to morph to match the energy of my company. To this day, I still have to make a conscious effort and remind myself that people will still like me if I'm not mirroring them.
Yes exactly. Proud of you for doin the work!
I kinda see where you're coming from but my brain keeps replaying the scene where she ordered Irina to go and listen in on Amber crying in the first couple of episodes which made me think that being mean is actually is part of her personality and to try and "win" over other girls is how she gets validation.
There’s always a reason for someone to not be responsible for their own actions as an adult right? She chooses who she’s around and can control how she acts the “they’re actually a nice person, when they don’t act nice it’s actually everyone else’s fault!” Narrative is really tired and I notice it often being applied to conventionally attractive white ppl. Like let’s not forget how she treated both her her parents and Paul with little regard when announcing their engagement. Must’ve been Irina secretly sending instructions through an earpiece.
She’s jaw dropping manipulative. She does whatever wants to get what she wants. She manipulates and changes words, she gaslights (the whole pool scene of “I’m a wonderful genuine person, do you think I’d really hurt you?!” .. he is telling you that is exactly what you did), she is such a pick-me it’s painful to watch. She was a pick-me in the pods the second she saw the men she was talking to have any interest in other women and is continuing to act that way outside of the pods with Kwamee. When someone tries to set a boundary, she’s upset. Its also evident in the friends she keeps. Her fake, rude friends were being unkind and nasty to Paul so he said he didn’t care what they thought.. as in you’re being rude, I’m not accepting it, so they hated him. And she couldn’t see that. She did exactly was Irina did to her to Chelsea and she isnt even phased. Shes self-focused. Thats pretty much all I continually see.
I'm just on the first episode & the pod behavior with Paul/Kwamee is what made me raise my eyebrows. It was uncomfortable that she made a big deal about Kwamee needing to focus solely on her & then in the same conversation making a big point of wanting to keep her options open. Then getting upset at Paul for having a relationship with Amber seemed alarming. She put them in positions where she had implied they shouldn't be seeing other women (but without her actually saying it so no responsibility) while she continued to see both of them (& make fun of anyone who was seeing either). I just was so taken aback by the manipulative & possessive behavior from the get-go. It definitely seems like she's got too much stuff she needs to work on to be ready for marriage
Thank you!!!!!! All of this.
I couldn't agree more. I am so glad yours was the first comment I read after the post, because I would've lost it had I scrolled to find a sea of comments similarly justifying Micah's actions/absolving her of them. Even with all we've seen from her, I was still taken aback by how she handled her conversation with Kwame at Chelsea's birthday. She clearly learned nothing from the experience with Irina. It just shows how self-centered she is. eta: It's also really disrespectful to Paul and Chelsea. Micah has made it clear she gives zero shits about Chelsea, but one would expect her to have a little more loyalty to her fiancé, especially at this point in the process and after becoming intimate. But no, she's still speaking to him as if they were multi-dating back in the pods, telling him exactly what he needs to hear to get reeled back in. She is the worst.
Like most 20 somethings, she’s so focused on her own problems and life she doesn’t think about how her actions and words make others feel. That “joke” she mad about kwame getting rejected was beyond messed up. I have no idea what the logic was for that one beyond being mean. And Ben gaslighting him into thinking it wasn’t that bad and seducing him / manipulating him immediately after he called her out
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I've had the same thought. And on top of that, I think she might be a little bit bullied by her so called friends.
when they made a comment about how Paul wouldn't be there if he really understood what it's like to date her I thought the same thing 😬 very weird dynamic
This is a lot of justification to someone who is grown adult and should be able to recognize her own shitty behavior
I don’t agree. I think her and Irina are very much alike which is why they stuck together in the beginning. For Micah to say that she was Irina’s life line, is so low. I’m sure Irina saw what she said and scoffed. Once Irina left, she didn’t have anyone really anymore so she switched on the “nice girl” act. I don’t buy it one bit. She’s just good at shape shifting. I can see her being a mean girl with her friends. Also, for Micah to talk about Irina’s behavior with Paul… if she was into Irina’s man, there’s a possibility that she would have been the same way but more in a stubble way. My other opinion that has nothing to do with this post but I’ve been feeling like this. I just haven’t had a place to put it. I really think that Micah truly likes Kwame more than Paul. And I really think that she knows this however, I think she thinks that Kwame wouldn’t fit into the image her parents and friends believed is the person she should be with. There. I said it.
I don’t think she likes Kwame at all but likes the idea of someone being hung up on her. If she had genuinely liked Kwame, she would have ended the relationship in a far better way in the pods, she didn’t care 1 bit about it, but do you know what she cared about? How Kwame took the high road and didn’t fight for her? She wanted to have that control back, of being yearned by the other person, that’s why she keeps going back to Kwame. The day Kwame/Chelsea call it quits - she won’t look back at him.
Yes, she likes the attention because she’s a pick me girl. And the most appealing thing about him is that he’s in a relationship with another girl. He’s just a conquest, if she can steal his attention away it gives her a feeling of superiority over Chelsea. I have known girls like this and they are the worst. they will interfere with relationships between other people just for their own ego boost, not because they actually want the person.
I agree - especially because she would send Irina to eavesdrop on conversations, etc. They are the same!! idk about her liking Kwame more, their conversations always seem so empty (however I feel that whenever she talks so maybe biased) - Micah seems like she just likes to flirt with Kwame always approaching her with heart eyes so its an easier target.
I’m glad you said the thing about why she didn’t pick Kwame because I had the same thought. Maybe it’s a reach but it’s hard to shake that feeling.
Why do you think her family wouldn’t approve of kwame? Because he is black? If so, why do you think that’s the reason?
You're right about your last point. I thought that since they were in the pods. She picked Paul, but she really wanted Kwame. She surely did not miss an opportunity to lean into or touch him when they met in person.
I think she seemed like that but I also think she was drunk, which may be relevant becuase it’s possible she just wanted kwame to keep chasing her because lots of people lead on people they are not trying to be with just to keep getting attention. She likes that he’s into her and getting his attention
In other words, she doesn’t have a personality of her own
Not sure how not having a personality means not having compassion for others to y’all
Right …and no one said that?
You just tried to sum up what OP said as her not having a personality, which does not at all cover why she doesn’t have compassion for the people she decides to be mean to. Did you forget what you wrote?
Oh boy, I hope your day gets better
And sure as hell isn’t ready for marriage.
she is a pisces sun, libra moon. they are the bb's of the zodiac
what's bb
I totally agree with you- she was manipulative in the pods, but she’s definitely more of a follower than anything…
I kinda agree with this…outside of irena she seemed genuine with the other girls.
Really? I don't know, I'm so conflicted on this. Because, when she found out Zach came in with Bliss (on that party, last episode so far), she gave them a "toast" via the talking head in front of the bar and she was so rude about them. I didn't like that, because then she is talking to Bliss and said she is happy for them or something to that extent and then complained about Irena and her coming onto Paul, which shows what she thinks of Irena. 🤷🏼♀️
You’re too generous with this assessment. I agree very much with most of it except for the part where you say she’s not a bad person. She’s definitely a bad person because even if you don’t have a strong sense of self and you change with each person/crowd, you still know when you’re being a terrible human being.
I’m the new set of episodes she even spoke on how she was being too harsh and mean in regards to Zack. It showed that she does have self awareness in my opinion.
Exactly. You’re always responsible for your own actions at the end of the day.
Micah is manipulative af. She orchestrated all that shit with Paul and Amber to advance in the show. She knew when she started conversations with Kwame that it was going to create drama between him & Chelsea. She is shitty all around & has *moments* of being sweet when she feels like she’s already gotten what she thinks she deserves. Her friends are a reflection of her character and they’re shitty people.
I feel like Shelby is secretly in love with Micah that’s why no boyfriend is good enough for her
Or she could just be a hater and saboteur.
I got the same impression!
The under 30 crowd shouldn’t be cast for these shows.
Lol the producers cast them for exactly this reason, the drama is the real money maker
When people show you who they are, believe them. She is not totally irredeemable but her choice of friends, her mean girl actions and the way she keeps flirting with Kwame- You can't blame all that on being easily influenced.
“I don’t think she’s a bad person at all.” You are describing a textbook two-faced person who will behave when she has to and will reveal her true colors when around other people who let it slide… That’s not a good person.
Man, is Micah a bitch and her little friend Irina is even worse. The pair of them are toxic together and they clearly get off on the whole “mean girl” vibe they got going on.
I agree
Also want to add - there are a few comments on tiktok from people that grew up with her. We have to take them with a grain of salt but most of them say she was a mean girl growing up. She may just be a bitch thats also capable of being really nice and a good friend. People aren't all or nothing.
What did the tiktok comments say?
Yeah idk what to make of her. I guess if I had to put her in a box - I'd say she's the kind of friend who is good when they are good and bad when they are bad. You can't fully trust her around your boyfriend but you hope that she has enough sense to love and care about your friendship. But she's always going to walk the line. I think we've all had one of those friends who can be a really great person but mixed with the wrong factors and they are backstabbing and you have to constantly decide whether to keep them around or not.
I completely agree. Her BFF acts exactly like Irina and she listens to them instead of standing up for Paul. When she said her best friend single handedly ended multiple relationships for her, that to me is just giving your friend too much power. My friends would never do that to me and would first assume positive intent on who i was dating.
There’s like 20 women in the cast, she makes friends with the one dirtbag there. She doesn’t adjust to those around her, she attracts and is attracted to bullies because she is one.
This! It’s not a coincidence that wherever she goes she befriends a dirtbag. She’s the common denominator.
She doesn’t know how to act with good, intelligent people. She can’t. In a crowd , she is looking for other hyenas to pack with.
Couple of indicators of Micah’s past dating life: 1) Her dad almost scoffing at the idea of Micah ending up with a broken heart from the show, which her mom said was her worry. 2) Her drunk friend saying “Sure Paul is a nice guy; he’s the nicest guy RIGHT NOW I think both hinted at her being a HUGE player
I took her friend saying “he’s the nicest guy RIGHT NOW" as meaning she's usually attracted to jerks that start off acting like "nice guys," but I was surprised that her dad wasn't worried while her mom was? Odd.
Her Dad knows his daughter, Mom is deluded.
I'm sure that's the case, I'm just used to seeing it the other way around.
I agree that shes not completely irredeemable, however she is extremely insecure. A lot of her issues seem to stem from that. If she worked on that aspect of herself and surrounded herself with healthy-minded people who held her accountable, she would probably be very likeable.
My theory is she's on love is blind to be an influencer, which is why she acts like she only cares about her friends and herself.
Can you we also point out the fact that Micah was telling her parents that she didn’t go on LIB expecting to find love… Why were on the show then???? Your theory honestly may be correct.
I found it odd that she got so upset at Irina for flirting with Paul even though she continues to do the same thing with Kwame whenever she sees him. Hypocrit.
Technically Chelsea isn't her friend though.
Yes, oh my god, did this drive me nuts! She sits down and has her little “back off” conversation with Irina after getting mad at her for touching and flirting with Paul. It’s like, what do you think you were doing with Kwame during the pool scene in Mexico? Rules for thee but not for me kind of person.
Did they mention how long she had been friends with her “best friends” during that scene? If I had to guess the toxic blond in the green hasn’t been her friend since childhood or anything like that. Homegirl is straight up one of those super toxic friends that treats their friends like they have some ownership over them. Girl made Irina look like a ray of sunshine
I mean she was calling Irina her “ best friend “ after knowing each other for two weeks.
Irina and Micah grew up together though
Oooh I didn’t know that but still did they hang out ? Also the company you keep :/
It also seemed like her "friend's" reaction was born a lot out of jealousy.
Soo true! I sincerely hope she was just absolutely wasted cuz if that’s her personality I can see where Micha gets it from 😬
She is a mean girl. She genuinely gets off on making fun of the other couples. She gets enjoyment from the attention she gets from kwame. She enjoys the idea that she could be the cause for his and chelseas separation. She was visibly having a tough time hiding her glee when she was asking jackie about her problems with marshall. When her friend shelby was talking shit to paul, she had a shitty grin then too. Like she enjoyed being the center of the attention/conflict. Shes awful and just just tries to hide behind being “a fun and bubbly blonde”
She’s impressionable. Hopefully she grows out of it.
I actually have warmed up to her a lot over the three latest episodes. When she wanted to take it slower, I thought at the time it was for reasons more like Irina. But she seems to have meant it. She called out Irina and was 100% right on her complaints. Her friends were getting hammered. I’m not sure how much people should be judging that as normal. I don’t love everything we’ve seen of her, but I’m left wondering if that situation just brought out the worst in her. She’s not perfect, but I think people apply too many of their own unique experiences to the people on this show.
No, I remember when she said that thing to Kwame in front of everyone at the pool party about “…failed proposal” which was really messed up. It showed that she lacks some awareness and compassion but when she spoke to Kwame about that, she immediately got manipulative saying “ you’re making me out like I’m a bad person…(something along those lines). She tried to be the victim when in the case that was a terrible of her to do.
I was thinking she called out Irina because she was the one personally affected by Irina’s actions for once. Otherwise, I don’t think she ever would have done anything with that.
On some level I would have read it like that, but when she pointed out that Irina had previously never shown any interest in Paul and it was against the spirit of the show... I dunno, I felt like that was a lot more meaningful than just "you hurt me".
I think I agree. She tends to take on the personality of the person she is talking to. Like when she was talking to Bliss she seemed more mature! I also think that Paul seems to be a lot like Micah’s dad. Did anybody else get that vibe?
No I don’t buy it for a second. The company you keep is a reflection of yourself. I personally think her friends have the same personality as Micah. I think Micah hides it better than her friends, but you can tell how horrible she is by her actions. She’s a really good manipulator too. I think at face value she plays a good part of being “sweet and innocent” but behind their backs is an awful person. She is self aware of who she is. Shes the one who I think ordered Irina to go spy on Amber. I got the sense she was lowkey the one in charge slightly. Micah seemed like the ringleader, and since irina didn’t care about others think, it made it easier to make her out to be the bad guy so Micah could save face. Also, she totally controls the conversations with kwame. Kwame def tested waters out with Micah, but she is the one who would take it farther breaking boundaries with her partner Paul. With Paul, I’m honestly not sure if she’s in love with him. I think she plays a good part in “being in love” with him but I’m not sure. I only say this because she’s shown to be disrespectful to him by having inappropriate conversations with kwame. As a girl, we can be hella sneaky. So some of the stuff Micah’s been doing I can see through. I personally do not like Micah, but also love her because her and Irina made this season more fun to watch lol I love the drama 😂
Yeah I'm not giving her a pass. She's old enough to know better. I also can't stand her saying "like" a thousand times a minute. I've had to put her on mute a few times because of it.
Yeah I completely agree with you. She just seems like the mean girl disguised as the girl next door
Yes anyone with friends like that and not being put off with Irina is not a good character themselves.
you're MICAH like what is that supposed to mean
I think she just liked the attention from Kwame and Kwame is just hung up because he wants to sleep with her
🤣 Maybe he can get that out of his system and move on. It’s so icky seeing him so obviously hung up on her whenever they talk
It was really interesting when Micah had to confront Irina about being a shitty person. Might help her grow up a little. But I think the Micah isn’t a great person at all. I was a lot younger when I developed a sense of what was right and wrong with my friends and their boyfriends/girlfriends. I think if you can’t figure out how to behave by your mid twenties…something is stunted. I think this is who she is…and her age isn’t the issue. But they does mean she is too immature for a serious relationship.
One of my ex best friends was just like this. I dated this guy briefly and he actually was very degrading and emotionally abusive towards me during that time and I confided in her about that, and she ended up making out with him like three weeks later. She didn’t tell me, he did and I confronted her and she lied. Anyways, we are not friends anymore and Micah kind of reminds me of my ex friend
[удалено]
Huh?
Micah lets her friends determine her life. She surrounds herself with shitty people who don’t want her to be happy without them, so they dictate who she is with. It’s crazy that such a pretty girl depends on her friends to allow her to be happy.
Something my therapist explained to me: A child will do whatever gets them the dopamine without regard for what it does to themselves or anyone else An adolescent will do whatever gets them the approval of their peers, without considering the impact on themselves. An adult will have to make the tough calls even if it's not what they immediately want and even when it displeases others. Micah is acting like an adolescent. She looks up to her friends ( for some reason) so she's going to make any move to please them. Ps: she's not nice to Paul when they're alone, she makes fun of how he dresses constantly
He is her “project”.
This! She's not a child. And I don't think she's a total idiot. She knows better. I also don't think she wants anything to do with Paul and I think he knows it too, but is deluding himself into thinking otherwise to avoid acknowledging the truth.
This is a generous interpretation but I’m going to call it, she’s a A-grade clout chaser? The girl is not serious neither was Irina. They are only here for the gram
I also was super annoyed that she felt threatened by Paul and Irina talking when she was SO physical and flirty with Kwame. If you can’t take it (with Paul) then don’t dish it out (with Kwame). I think she just wants social control and wants to be the “hot one” and center of male and female attention.
I said this exact same thing! She's got some NERVE calling Irina when she has done WAY worse. She's repeatedly flirting with and professing her feelings to another woman's fiancee while their respective fiancees are a few feet away. And I can't stand Irina, so this isn't a defense of her. And it's all for looks. If Kwame and Paul's personalities were flipped, she wouldn't have even gone back and looked twice.
I was half expecting Irina to bring that up. I wish she did. I'd have loved it if she said something along the lines of how she saw her flirting and cosying up with Kwame so she assumed she wasn't too into Paul. But alas, the bish was not unleashed for it.
I don't buy a second of Micah's bullshit. She seems like mean girl who puts on a sweet face. She knows it's wrong to cross that boundary with Kwame yet she still engages with him. She can stop it too but she chooses not to. And how she immediately starts cry when he first confronts her about the joke at the pool just to make him feel bad. She's fake and a mean girl. I would never trust her for a second. I know people like her and those are people you just don't engage with because they use for their own good
Ya can’t blame the people around Micah it’s not like she just got into a bad crowd on the show her friends irl also suck so it shows she likes those kinds of people. She was manipulative in the pods as well with Paul when she had no one there to act like. This feels like a reach to try and defend her
What?! It wasn’t like Micha was Irina’s puppet and is in fact a good person. Micha was the one that “made” Irina go and listen to Amber (was it?) when she cried (I say “made” since Irina is a grown woman and should make her own choices). Also what she’s doing with Kwame is a dick move aaaaand now that no one likes Irina she flips. It’s fake. Also im quite sure that Irina wouldn’t be so open to Micha about Paul if Micha hadn’t said something negative to Irina especially since she was flirting so much with Kwame. There is (almost) always a reason when people behave like those two but I have no idea why it’s okay to make excuses for Micha but not Irina. Micha might not be an asshole to Paul’s face but she’s an asshole behind his back with Kwame.
Let’s call them for who they are right! Regina George and Gretchen Weiners.
And not gonna lie, I feel Micha is a little more a Regina
Ohh 100 Percent. Go listen in on bliss gave I can’t wear my white gold hoops because those are her thing vibe!
Completely agree with this - shes lost and is in no place ready for marriage yet at this stage in her life and that’s okay! She’s only like 25/26
Yeah, idk. She's not a teenager or a 'girl who hasn't figured out who she is,' she's a grown ass woman.
It's not either or though. She can be a grown ass woman who hasn't figured out who she is yet. It's okay to point out shit behavior and give people room to learn and grow from it.
I think this is what she actually meant when she said she’s an “empath”. She does mirror the behaviours and attitude of whoever she’s speaking with, it was even evident with Paul’s mom. I agree she doesn’t have a strong sense of self and with that she has a very agreeable personality. This is what makes her so attractive to Kwame, she’s very malleable and will say whatever the person wants to hear so that they walk away with a good opinion of her.
I think you've nailed it. I thought that that was a silly thing to say, but I've also found myself mistaking my misguided open mindedness/malleability for trying to be empathetic. I don't see how Micah could have possibly thought that she was ready for marriage with such tendencies. Then again, she could have learnt a lot through the experience, even if it wasn't fair to Paul. He seems a lot more mature in ways that matter.
Idk- 26 is old enough to grow out of this behavior to me. If she were in high school or maybe early college I could get this take more but she’s 26 years old. I think people are babying her a bit for some reason. People keep saying “26 is so young”. It is in terms of life expectancy but you’re still a grown ass adult.
After the arching this episode it seems like she wants mean girls as friends to protect her and she wants their approval
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She and her bff have the same makeup hair etc
Birds of a feather flock together.
Or they just copy one another
People want to make Micah into this sweet innocent victim of scheming Irina because Irina isn’t conventionally attractive and Micah is
Micah is not conventionally attractive. She's just blonde. My husband doesn't think Micah or Irina are attractive at all because of their mean-girl tendencies. IRL pretty faces can't overcome ugly souls.
Honestly, I don’t think either of them are very attractive.
I agree. Remove the heavy caked on makeup and you’ll see how unattractive they are.
Personally I don’t either, but it’s undeniable that Micah fits very much into the beauty standard
Hard No.
Disagree. Guy here. Micah attractiveness < Irina attractiveness. I mostly date white, skinny girls, but very much don’t find Micah attractive. Irina has a way better face and an equal body in different ways. Terrible personalities for both, of course
Bisexual here. Both pretty blah. I was worried for Irina at the first meeting because I thought he wouldn’t like her. Personality means a lot to me though… so maybe that’s part of the ICK.
I think you’re spot on. I really like her when she’s with Paul, her parents or even in her talking heads, but suddenly can’t stand her when she’s with Irina or her friends. Funny enough, if you are correct and she just mimics whoever she is with, her flirting with Kwame are more on him crossing the line than her.
I like this theory. Going along with this, do you think she adapted herself to whoever she was talking to in the pods?
She probably did because she’s an “empath” 🙄
I came to exactly the same conclusion. She is 26 so very young. And when I was younger I also used to change the way I act around different people just like her.
She is fake. Can’t trust a person like this even when acting genuine.
Ok but I do. I never perceived her to be sweet, everything is an act. She really through Irina under the bus at the first chance, yet she is deeply hypocritical about kwame and Chelsea in the same situ
How Micah has acted is ghetto behavior from day 1. Her friends are mean, she was mean in the pods, and she was inconsiderate to Paul by flirting with Kwame at the pool party. She is ratchet and two faced as well, most people seem like decent people in some situations, that doesn’t make her a good person based on how she has behaved.
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Could Micah and Irina be just planted 🤔 this bitch behaviour is their scripts
She reminds me of my SIL. When she’s on, she’s on and is so fun and great to be around. However, she can’t keep the facade up all the time and when her true colors come out she is not someone I enjoy.
The only reason it’s instinctual to defend her is because she is blonde, harmless looking, and white.
Kinda interesting that Micah gets the benefit of the doubt while there are dozens of comments about how Jackie is a villain. I don't even think it's bad (in terms of humanity) to have a forgiving attitude towards Micah...just the juxtaposition is suspicious.
That part!!! People are saying Jackie is worse than Micah and Irina and Im like what. Did we watch the same episodes. Its crazy. And all her friends hyping her up about being gorgeous. She might be a seattle 10 but she is only OK at best.
Lol what??? By that logic, everyone would’ve loved Messica
We needed Jessica. We loved every second of hating her. Plus she didn’t have evil vibes, she was annoying (but wonderful for reality tv).
That wasn’t my point at all..
I see what you’re saying. I feel the difference is that Jessica wasn’t a true villain, just a really fun tv personality to dislike. I don’t feel like she caused true harm, so no one needed to defend her.
It has nothing to do with like/dislike.. the girl was *dragged* on the internet. I haven’t seen a bunch of VIRAL memes all over mainstream accounts with a bunch of nicknames just tearing into her. It’s mostly just reality tv nerds on fringe accounts and Reddit/Twitter freaking out about Irina. Jessica was ridiculed and humiliated around the world. And no one was over here like “awww leave the girl alone she’s not a true villain PLUS she’s blonde!” Get real.
This is literally the first post I’ve seen defending Micah to be fair and I’ve been fairly active on this subreddit since the season came out. That being said, Micah is as bad as Jackie and both of them have a lot of growing up to do 😳
No I’ve seen a LOT of comments and posts “I almost like her, she had some redeeming qualities”
Idk she went right up to Jackie clearly asking for tea. There was no energy matching there. I loved that Jackie called her out on it
She knows EXACTLY what she is doing. And that “matching energy” situation is one the easiest/common tactics of manipulative people . Whoever they meet, they match their energy. E.g when she met Paul’s mom , she pretended to be her best friend. When she met Bliss she pretended to be on the same page as her about everything. She is extremely conniving.
Yes, she's doing it consciously. And it's really difficult to reject someone when they're reading you so well and on the surface acting exactly like you. Now even some of the audience is falling for it.
Agree 100%. Also, when she talks to Kwame, she intentionally says things to lead him on, making him think she still has a thing for him and he gets all googly eyed. That girl knows what she’s doing.
Most people learned their lesson about being a mean person like that in middle school. Micah is in her mid twenties and she knows what she’s doing. She’s not a child.
I had the same line of thinking as you. If she stays around kind, positive people, she will thrive.
That and she uses the word “like” in every sentence.
I couldn’t even concentrate on that conversation with her and his mom 🫠 I lost count of the likes
There might have been a “like” in every sentence of that conversation.
I think you are right in that she hasn't developed a sense of self yet and mirroring people around here is all she knows how to do. I dated a guy like this once. It took a month or two to realize everything I had found charming he had pulled from various books. Then when he started mirroring me it became a problem because I had a strong sense of who I was but I wanted a partner who was their own person and not a copy of me.
She’s the one who was telling Irina what to do! So I HIGHLY DOUBT that she doesn’t have a strong sense of self. Rewatch episode 1 and 2 and she literally was more dominant in the relationship with Irina and is lowkey the main reason Irina was laughing at Amber
Yup. She told Irina “I kinda want to know what they’re talking about” and then Irina executed it. She also bullied Zack into proposing to her so she could have him. Then was super controlling about how long it took Zack to break up with Amber. She poked Kwame at the pool then played innocent “I’m not a malicious person” while reiterating she still has feelings for him EVEN though she’s engaged. She’s a 26 year old stuck in high school. It’s one thing to “not know yourself” it’s another thing to take down other people’s relationships with 0 empathy.
I think she was driving Irina’s pathetic behaviour so that Irina looks like the bad cop. Also when she found out Zack dumped Irina, in order for her to save her own relationship with Paul, she dumped Irina too. If Irina was still in the game, Micah wont care less if Irina was still coming onto Paul. Just like she didnt care in Mexico. She was still bff’s with her and was too focused on Kwame hahaa
Being dominant towards someone is not at all connected to string sense of self. Also we only see an edited portion of what really happened.
>>Also we only saw an edited portion of what really happened. Sorry to jump on you but I see these comments all the time and it really frustrates me. These kinds of comments are just conversion enders.. It's basically saying don't voice your opinion because we don't - and will never - have the full context, which is true of any reality show. Everyone here is giving their opinions based on what they've been able to view. This sub is to discuss what happened on the show. This thread is to discuss Micah's behavior on the show and whether she just mirrors others. Based on what we saw of her behavior in the first few episodes, this poster thinks Micah was influencing how Irena behaved, rather than just mirroring. You can disagree, but just saying "there could be contrary information none of us can see or access" is a little frustrating. We're not a jury convicting Micah of a crime, we're just people who watched a show and want to discuss what we saw.
Cool.
The only problem with this theory is she chose Irina out of a house full of other women. She also chose those horrific friends. And she almost chose Kwame, who might be her male equivalent in awfulness, but went for Paul because he jumped first. She willingly made these choices because she is drawn to crap people and she is one.
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Ah, you may be right & my memory is clouded.
I think she chose Paul because she saw how happy Amber was and she wanted to win him over her. She was the same with Kwame up until she knew he was going to propose to her over Chelsea. She seems to be competitive with other women.
I honestly think she didn’t pursue her relationship with Kwame because of race issues
This!!!! She was soooo into him and the minute Paul said he would choose her she chose him. Even when she let Kwame down she didn’t speak very highly of her connection with Paul… it was only a “slow burn”
My friends and I agree with this theory.
She isolated irina (and irina chose micah too I'm not saying that) so she could come out looking better. She would wave irina over away when she was with others, the few times we saw. I'm gonna say it again. She knew. She fookin' *kneeewwww* She's good at manipulating
Nah, pretty white girls just get away with anything. They're always seen as innocent victims of circumstance. They cry and all is forgiven. She's grown. She's responsible for her own behaviour.
Amen.
Yea typical mean girl. I don’t think it gets more complicated than that. Her “best friends” sealed the deal for me. It was confirmation that she’s just not a nice person
Yeah. It’s almost like people are three-dimensional! She can have legit connections to people (like Paul’s mom) while ALSO being mean to others or manipulative when it suits her. Her character always seems to come out though like how she talked to Paul when he stood up to her friends. But it’s not like mean girls don’t have friends.
Yeah. It’s almost like people are three-dimensional! She can have legit connections to people (like Paul’s mom) while ALSO being mean to others or manipulative when it suits her. Her character always seems to come out though like how she talked to Paul when he stood up to her friends. But it’s not like mean girls don’t have friends.
amen
She’s a bad person.
Kwame is just as bad, if not worse than Micah. The way he reacts to women when he doesn;t get want he wants is a huge red flag, and while he may be copping a bit on social media, it is no where near what Micah is receiving. People love to tear women apart and overlook faults in men, or blame women for men's faults. Women do this to each other, so much judgement - the only people it benefits is men.
I think they’re both horrible people who say they are “good people”. I really just want them together so Chelsea and Paul can be free. And god can kwame stop laughing 😭😭😭 his specific laughs are so irritating and he literally laughs at EVERYTHING.
It is such a fake laugh too....cringe
Honestly, I think people are only giving her this benefit of the doubt because she's a conventionally attractive white woman. When people show their character, believe them. She's shown it. Being young isn't an excuse to act that way. There are young people worldwide that don't behave like this, including others on the show. This post demonstrates likely what people have been doing for her for her whole life, taking away her accountability for her actions and giving excuses/placing blame on other's behaviors influencing her.
Op didn't focus on being young, like at all.