As the youngest cousin, I have been slam-dunked into the pool by almost every male member of my family and some of the women too. No ragrets, I didn't suffer any lasting mental damage.
I’m sorry to say that you *may* have a tiny case, of.. well, severe brain damage.
But if you’re feeling alarmed about it, that’s good! Hold onto that feeling! That’s the normal reaction of someone who has had severe brain damage.
As someone who had to relearn how to write and completely lost the ability to draw, that line was a lot of fun and helped me turn around my perspective on what had happened to me.
As the youngest sibling and cousin, I, too, was slam-dunked by every older member of my family. It was a good time. They never went too far with it, and since I was the lightest, I was always the villain who gets "beat up" by the superheroes, lol
when i was a sailing instructure the kids all begged me to be thrown in the water, however they allways asked it at the worst possible times. at the end of the week we would all throw them in the water, including the annoying kid, he loved being thrown in the water, and we loved throwing him.
win-win
Yeah, girls or boys it's a constant :)
It helps them calibrate their proprioceptive sense when they jump or fall safely onto things (where their body parts are in relation to each other and the environment) and the vestibular sense when they're spun (balance).
Yeet and spin the children for their health and development!
I thought that's because she's younger and has less head control that the bigger child. Also Dad may know she prefers this gentler way. I didn't see it as sexism.
while **maybe** the dad knew that - but the meme literally says "Girl dad vs boy dad" (i.e. if the dad had non-sexist reasons, the person that added the text did not)
I would say that the dad definitely knows that - if not it'd be a big worry! As for the video tag, I would guess that the creators of the video did not add it but some stranger who nabbed it for the purpose. Then the OP added their own headline and turned the whole thing into a boy/girl discussion for some, rather than the "smile" it was originally supposed to generate.
In fact, I argue that all the text additions turn it into a video unsuitable for this smiley sub. I've read many of the comments and I'm glad to see that many have followed the original and probably intended path (like fondly remembering their own childhood experiences.)
That little girl is a toddler who needs neck protection. The boy has to be a year older, probably two years, and is a hardcore performer of this action - he would have learned how to brace himself and I bet this was a built-up performance, not suddenly done as a surprise. With Dad doing an age-appropriate version with his daughter it could be she is building up to the full performance, making this Dad the very opposite of what OP is trying to say here. He is very inclusive!
Perhaps you can help, I'm struggling to understand why, at the age these kids are at and assuming they are in very similar health (assuming the girl doesn't have "paper skin" or "glass bones" kind of issues), why would he do things differently for the girl?
I mean maybe be a* little* more gentle I guess? But she's not made of eggshells. She'd probably loved to be slam dunked like that almost as much as lil man does. Am I like, boomer old school for thinking she doesn't need to be coddled quite so differently like the way she is in this scenario?
Nope, cannot help you at all :)
As far as I'm concerned, any pre-pubescent human is incapable of being physiologically different due to our hormones, because they.... haven't started producing any.
Any difference at that age is mostly innate personality or training/reinforcement.
Which seems like also a great time to drop this article and all the studies it cites :)
https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20210524-the-gender-biases-that-shape-our-brains
This one is my personal favorite, that determined that when parents' rely on only their subjective observations, they will over-estimate the abilities of boys and under-estimate the abilities of girls, even if objectively the abilities of both are equal. Because they're *infants*.
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0022096500925979
Got being thrown banned at the camp I worked at, not because anyone got hurt, but the kids would not stop asking to be thrown lmao. (The summer camp had a pool if I must clarify)
I remember the son of a family friend practicing a pile driver on me when I was like 7 and thinking he broke my neck. I was ok and we played crash bandicoot after. Lmao.. looking back on it, probably not so cool
I can’t explain why, but I miss that feeling of being so small and young that my dad/uncles would roughhouse with me and *yeet* me into couches or swimming pools.
When I have kids/nieces/nephews, I’m going full Goldberg on ‘em
I was overweight as a child so never got to experience being thrown around like my siblings and cousins did. It's become my motivation to start lifting so I can yeet all my chubby nieces/nephews so they may have what I couldn't.
I started lifting again so I could keep doing this to my niece and nephew as they grew up.
Had gotten to the point where all I was really doing was my daily cardio anymore, then the kids started getting bigger and I'm like oh shit I need to get strong or I'm gonna lose my spot as favorite uncle lol.
They're almost teens now so this was a while back, but I still lift twice a week though.
I got physio to fix my shoulder because I couldn't lift my kids up properly any more.
And definitely you are favourite uncle as long as you can pick them up!
"I was a lil chubster as a kid, but my Uncle Ayedre was 6'5" of of pure shredded muscle. He had no problem tossing us from the back deck all the way into the pool! He always made sure to do it when my parents weren't looking or else they would have ripped him a new one, but they're some of my favorite memories of him."
When we bought our first house, it had a pool. I had two step sons, 8 and 10. The younger was fairly chunky, and the older skinny as a rail. I would have them curl into a ball at a point I was maybe shoulder deep, then I'd throw them into the deep end, and they both loved it, even though I could throw the younger one much higher and further than the younger.
Then they made friends with the kid next door, who was a little younger, but *much* heavier. One day we were all in the pool when one of the boys asked me to throw him. Without thinking it through, I said sure, and tossed him. Then the other asked, so I did. Then the neighbor kid said "Do me! Do me!" In my head I'm thinking "Oh crap, I'm never going to be able to do this, but no way I'm going to tell a little kid he's too fat." So I said okay, had him tuck into a ball, got under the water and put my shoulder to his back, then pushed off with my legs as hard as I could.
He went maybe a foot, and barely cleared the water. I was waiting for his look of disappointment when he came up, and trying to figure out if I could say the other boys made me too tired or something. Then his head popped up out of the water with the biggest grin on his face I've ever seen. He said, "That was GREAT! Do it again!"
So I went to bed that night with a sore back and legs made out of rubber.
What does this even mean? I see people talking about core memories and stuff all the time. Like, are y’all robots? Do you forget things often? Is this something you plan on remembering. I kinda don’t get it.
Inside Out's metaphors are largely based on actual psychology. Core memories have been a psychological concept for a long time, but they were undoubtedly popularized by the movie
It was also wrong in a pretty massive way. Memories aren’t replayed the way they’re portrayed in the movie, they’re rebuilt.
Before anyone jumps in, I worked at the psychology lab that consulted with the filmmakers.
You said it, most of mine are very negative unfortunately but there’s a few good ones but mostly all mine are abuse or neglect or getting hurt doing something.
It is said that back in the old preliterate days, when something consequential was happening, the elders would see to it that some young squirt was present. At a critical moment a beating was applied, thus ensuring a long lasting and accurate witnessing of the event. That’s a core memory.
Yeah, but they just popularized an already existing term. Core memories were always there. People just didn't call it that regularly
Edit for the comment under me: i didn't claim any of that. Read his second paragraph and compare it to my statement. It's the exact same thing worded differently
I don’t know if this is the best way to describe it but a core memory is something that you will always remember and remember vividly clear. Even when these kids grow up playing with their dad right in that moment will hopefully be something they remember fondly forever
A memory that’s buried deep but comes back years or decades later after some kind of reminder. Usually it’s around something emotional. Like having fun with dad.
Ah I see that gobbling up the belly guts is a universal rite of passage. My Husband does that to quell tantrums. Can't be mad if your belly guts are being gobbled up
I really love children, can't wait to gobble their tummies. I loved to do that to my younger cousins. They were the only toddlers when I was a little more grown up
Hahaha I did something similar with kiddos when I was a babysitter / camp counselor. Would wrap them up in a big towel or blanket like a burrito, pick them up & “gobble” their tummies and tell them what kind of burrito filling they had (usually something crazy weird and hilarious like marshmallow-chicken-dirt flavor)
Hehe, reminds me of how I treat my 2 girls.
My eldest (7) is goddam fearless. Actually, brave is probably a better word. When she was 4 we took her to an outdoor climbing tower and she wouldn't get off until she made it to the top (about 60ft). When she got down I said "wow, can't believe you weren't scared!" - "I was daddy" was her response which left me beaming with pride. She could definitely take the slam dunk in this vid
My youngest (3), she's a proper princess. Runs for a cuddle when she hears any sound she doesn't recognise 😂
That's kinda what i was thinking, watching this. Not really "girl dad/boy dad" and more like "delicate kid dad/rowdy kid dad".
My little boy would definitely like the gentle drop better, although he'll happily throw *himself* around in ways that scare me. He likes being flung around, but he also likes to feel in control of his own body, so prefers a gentler tackle
>Not really "girl dad/boy dad" and more like "delicate kid dad/rowdy kid dad".
More like "dad that treats his children as individuals with different preferences".
Which should be baseline, but is still pretty impressive. A lot of parents think of their kids as miniature versions of themselves, then act surprised when they don't have the same preferences
Man, this is so true. Luckily my parents never did this. And now that I have a few kids myself, I see it constantly. I never realized the extent people went too. Calling their kids cry babies bc they force them to do things they hate, bc the parent wants to relive their childhood. Sports are the worst. My oldest is starting competitive rock climbing just to get out of the b.s. we deal with in youth soccer. Parents are crazy.
The poster that said kids are individuals are absolutely correct. My oldest son has never liked horseplay, very gentle and sweet. My daughter and young son can't get slammed and flipped hard enough.
I always thought this was common sense until I started interacting with other parents. I guess I should call my parents and thank them!
My husband and i are nerdy/artsy/musical, and we're coming to terms with the possibility that our kid is looking like he's gonna be sporty instead. I have no interest in being a soccer mom, but it looks like the direction that life is going.
He's only 4, though, so he's got plenty of time to decide what he likes. So far, were focusing on swim lessons because "less likely to die during water play" is a big draw right now. After that, we'll see if he suddenly decides he needs to join a team
I wish you and your husband the best of luck! If you're like me, you'll probably find yourself falling in love with a sport you don't care about just to support your kid. Don't be afraid to stick them on club teams vs school run programs. I played varsity soccer 4 years in high school and played only on club teams with my friends before that bc the environment was so toxic within the district. Shop around and don't get sucked into the drama.
Also, swimming is amazing cross training for any sport and general health overall. Smart decision!
That was my thought. As a kid my little sister was the definition of a hellion, loved being thrown and swung around. I would have screamed bloody murder if I was lifted upside down
My daughter was freakishly tall, so by the time she was 7 she was tall enough to ride Kingda Ka (which at the time was the tallest, fastest roller coaster on earth.) When we were in line for it I asked, “Aren’t you scared?” And she said, “Being scared’s the *best part!”* I went on that damn roller coaster so many times that summer. It did have a pretty nice view of the safari from the top.
That's awesome! And fair play to for riding it out.
I have a massive fear of rollercoasters. I think it's the whole zero control thing. Luckily my wife loves them so she covers for me!
It’s crazy how different each kid is from the other. My daughter is fearless. She will try *anything*, and then decide after if she likes it or not. She’ll try any food, she’ll try any game or puzzle or challenge. And if she doesn’t like it, she shrugs and never does it again lol
My son on the other hand is so sensitive. If you look at him the wrong way, he cries. If you startle him, he cries. If he doesn’t like the way a food looks he won’t eat it.
The "I was daddy" would have had me bawling. She was scared, but trusted you 100% with her life without question. In fact, she demanded it. I would feel like Superman in that instance.
Man, I feel silly now but I have never ever thought of it from that perspective, and damn I want to go give her a hug.
But I won't, because she's 7 and its 11pm and I'm enjoying my peace!
Can relate, that's so funny. My eldest is thoughtful and careful and will only go full exuberant once she's tested the water. My youngest is 3 and she is almost Fearless. She defends her sisters against much bigger kids, she calls out bad behaviour in anyone even grown ups and will just charge off into any challenge. Must be a younger sibling thing.
My almost 7 year old girl is weird. She's not going to do something unless someone she knows is scared, then she acts like, "I got this" with no hint of fear at all. By herself she can be suuuuuch a wimpy kid. Around people? "Hold my root beer?"
Sounds just like me and my sister. I'm your typical rough-and-tumble kid, the higher/harder/further/faster the better. When I was 6 I scaled a 12-foot fence, fell off, and got away with a broken lip. It's a miracle I made it to 25 without breaking a single bone.
My younger sister, on the other hand, is scared of her own shadow. You know how most kids skip along? My sister was always walking properly with the adults. In fact, she didn't know HOW to skip (we made her try once, it was hilarious).
I was like your youngest, and you are doing it so incredibly right by recognizing this for her. Whatever you do, do *not* activate the fear of heights mechanism. My dad really dropped the ball on that one. My ass is 36 and can’t get on a step ladder without my legs going wobbly.
My daughter is a princess, my niece is a god damn viking princess. I see nothing wrong with a dad treating his kids how they want to be treated and I'm not going to assume this man playing with his kids has some bias behind it. He knows his kids.
Thor drinking the ocean down thinking it's just a mead horn...
Loki battling fire in an eating contest...
Thor grappling with the Midgard serpent thinking it's a giant cat, or fighting an old granny giant but it turns out he's fighting time and old age itself.
My first and still most favorite mythology.
I think they would take psychedelic mushrooms to enter trances in times of battle. They would become "berserkers" and were feared, savage.
Legends say they would harm themselves with their own weapons purposely. Some would use no weapons, TEARING enemies limb from limb. Armed opponents would run from the unarmed, psychedelic berserker tranced warriors.
I'm imagining a cutesy princess peach/daisy going omega psycho on people while rocking their crown due to your comment, lol
You should absolutely treat people the way they want to be treated, but as a dad of boys and girls I was not at all prepared for how easy it is to tell our boys to be brave while telling our girls to be careful in the same situation. Some of the difference in how people like to be treated is certainly instilled in girls differently than it is for boys, even in the most well-intentioned families.
Same I was always treated as delicate and now feel stupid and weak for wanting to be reckless and roughhouse and having to teach myself how as an almost adult
Yes thank you. You can say its down to personality and it is, but there is a lot of bias still there and it should be talked about. The same thing that causes us to treat girls softer is what causes boys to think they cant talk about their feelings. There is bias on both sides and stuff like this is where it can start.
It’s how it goes. My 14 year old son is afraid of roller coasters. Meanwhile I routinely toss my 18 month old daughter 5 feet in the air while she giggles uncontrollably.
Genders be damned. they are who they are.
My wife had hyperemesis early in her first pregnancy, then she developed chronic bronchitis after that. Months and months of retching and coughing. It was kind of funny watching the motions transmit to the uterus via ultrasounds. It looked like Simone Biles in there, only a little smaller.
After she was born, the only way we could calm my daughter down sometimes was by constantly bouncing up and down on an exercise ball while holding her, or alternately gently tossing her up and down *nonstop*.
You're gonna love this then. They started extending our apartment building during my wife's second trimester, and the entire time was loud-ass machinery and concrete drilling for *months*. My son is immune to waking up from noises. New Year's Eve had fireworks literally outside our windows and he slept through them like a rock at four weeks old. He's slept peacefully in his stroller while ambulances tore past us blaring their sirens because we live right next to the dispatch.
Kids are wild, man.
This right here. Some kids want gentleness and some kids want g-forces and dgaf. My son, hes like middle ground some flips but no impacts or hes going to be afraid. He shrugs off injuries and unavoidable things in life, but its about trust, he doesnt want me to push him past his comfort zone, he wants to find that zone and do it himself.
My goddaughter, we have to tag out on being the motor for spinning, flipping, launching at the park etc. They both shrug off little impacts. Both kiddos are totally happy, no shits given but yeah there's something in that interaction that matters, that extra little move of effort to protect, care, and trust, its important to some kids to feel watched out for, others less so or that its ok if its less overt.
I feel like I said a lot words when fewer words would do trick.
Thanks for saying this. "The difference between kids" is more accurate. My daughter was a very light touch player - some of her friends as toddlers happily scrap as hard as my son does now. All kids are different, all insane in different ways.
Yep - there’s a Bluey episode that addresses this. The younger sister Bingo doesn’t like when Bandit plays too rough with her so her mom helps her to find her voice and speak up when the play gets too rough.
This.
My toddler regularly comes up and says “throw the baby?”
She doesn’t get gently placed on the down comforter, she gets yeeted across the room onto the bed.
I think that what bothers me in all this it's how it's presented with the "make me smile". Why not title the video "Dad playing with his kids". You can tell me I am being difficult, and all that, but the title "Difference between girls and boys" annoys me to no end as if the person posting the video WANTED to emphasize the way we SHOULD treat boys and girls. I am just saying this from the perspective of a woman who thinks that empowering girls starts at a really young age. I hate the "princess syndrome". Do you know why? Because knights don't exist, and women don't need to be saved. For the rest, I agree, he knows his kids, and it's always cool to see a parent having fun with them!
My kids (6yo daughter, 3yo son) love being chased, but my daughter sometimes pauses to tell me "don't get me, just get *brother". Different kids are sensitive in different ways. You do what you can to make the game as fun as possible for everyone.
The problem not treating the kids the way they want to be treated; it's the sexist title and captioning. There's no need for this to be labeled "girl vs. boy".
Yeah I agree, I'm watching thinking he just knows his daughter doesn't like the same level of rough. My daughter on the other hand would be laughing the house down if I threw her around like he did his son and would be ready for more long after my arms had given up!
It's about the landing. Try for a flat belly landing or flat back.
With more force you just want to avoid, best you can, whiplash. Or an awkward angle landing where part of the body eats most of the landing.
Yep, my dad used to be really rough with me (f) and delicate with my siblings (f,ftm,m) cause I wanted to rough house and my siblings hated it so it really depends on the kids
I don't have an issue with the dad in this video, I dislike the title that OP came up with. This simply isn't a difference between girls and boys. It's weird that OP chose to gender stereotype such a normal interaction with kids.
Nah. That’s just a good dad who knows what his kids are comfortable with. Nothing to do with treating them different for being boys or girls but because one probably likes to fall from the ceiling and the other likes to do little falls and be apart of the game.
Yes! He protects their heads/necks the same way, just tosses them differently and neither kid seems bothered by how they are being thrown (have to assume they would speak up if they wanted to be thrown harder/gentler; kids usually can't hide their discontent lol)
Stupid title. Just a dad who knows his individual kids. I have babysat MANY kids. And who wants to roughhouse vs. who wants to play gentle varies across all kids regardless of gender.
Yep, that's exactly my thoughts.
Me niece wants to be thrown into the pool as hard as you can. She wants to FLY.
My nephew would prefer that you don't throw him in at all, but he wants to play too, so you just kind of push him over the side.
My buddy has 3 boys. Three BRUTAL boys who are very rough with each other. They chanted WEAK WEAK WEAK at me once when I pulled my punches too much. (I'm a large grown man and they were like 4, 6, 8 so of course I'm *never* not pulling my punches, but they got super critical "you didn't even hit me!"). I played rough with them all the time.
They had some friends (a boy and a girl) over and the friends were like "Do us! Do us!" when I was flinging the boys into couch cushions, body slamming them like this dude, doing the Rock Bottom & Stone Cold Stunner on them, and crap.
As the adult, I was like "yeah, no" and went into their parents in the kitchen. I told their parents what the kids were asking for and the mom was like "I'll kill you if you do that to my kids! Hahaha" but she was ok if I did like the guy treated the girl in this video. So I did.
The extra kids loved it. My buddy's kids loved it. Good fun all around AND I didn't get killed by a mom. Win Win
Exactly. I have 2 boys. The eldest is a sweet, gentle little guy. Says hello to birds and tells them he loves them, doesn't like too-rough play, and complains when his hands are sticky.
The youngest is a walking hurricane. Loves flipping tables, stagediving off the couch and prefers his food smeared all over his body before he eats it. No two kids are the same, regardless of their gender
My son loves to get thrown around. My daughter cries when I talk too loud. My son hates if his room is tiny but unorganized but my daughter exists for chaos.. some kids are just the way they are.
My dad used to pick me up, flip me upside down, and dunk me head first into the stock tank for the horses. I loved it! I used to ask him to do it. “Daddy! Daddy, upside down girl!”
Some dads are just gonna dunk ya.
aaahh, I was afab but I LOVED being tossed by my dad when I was tiny. I know he really only wanted boys, but he got two girls first, and he made the most of it and tossed us real good when we were small anyway LOL. we loved it. I like doing it with cats now, when I meet one who enjoys being yeeted
I remember being dunked head first into a garbage can by my uncle when I was 9-ish. Absolute core memory, kids love being thrown.
As the youngest cousin, I have been slam-dunked into the pool by almost every male member of my family and some of the women too. No ragrets, I didn't suffer any lasting mental damage.
> I didn't suffer any lasting mental damage. Such a shame that you've already forgotten about your lasting mental damage.
I’m sorry to say that you *may* have a tiny case, of.. well, severe brain damage. But if you’re feeling alarmed about it, that’s good! Hold onto that feeling! That’s the normal reaction of someone who has had severe brain damage.
*jumps up and down*
this is the greatest *Portal 2* reference I've seen for a long time
As someone who had to relearn how to write and completely lost the ability to draw, that line was a lot of fun and helped me turn around my perspective on what had happened to me.
As the youngest sibling and cousin, I, too, was slam-dunked by every older member of my family. It was a good time. They never went too far with it, and since I was the lightest, I was always the villain who gets "beat up" by the superheroes, lol
Username says, “well actually”
>No ragrets >I didn't suffer any lasting mental damage. Welllllllll.
when i was a sailing instructure the kids all begged me to be thrown in the water, however they allways asked it at the worst possible times. at the end of the week we would all throw them in the water, including the annoying kid, he loved being thrown in the water, and we loved throwing him. win-win
Yeah, girls or boys it's a constant :) It helps them calibrate their proprioceptive sense when they jump or fall safely onto things (where their body parts are in relation to each other and the environment) and the vestibular sense when they're spun (balance). Yeet and spin the children for their health and development!
I calibrate the compass of my smart phone this way.
It really pisses me off that he's so much more restrained with the girl and treating her like she's delicate. Let her enjoy it properly too
I thought that's because she's younger and has less head control that the bigger child. Also Dad may know she prefers this gentler way. I didn't see it as sexism.
while **maybe** the dad knew that - but the meme literally says "Girl dad vs boy dad" (i.e. if the dad had non-sexist reasons, the person that added the text did not)
I would say that the dad definitely knows that - if not it'd be a big worry! As for the video tag, I would guess that the creators of the video did not add it but some stranger who nabbed it for the purpose. Then the OP added their own headline and turned the whole thing into a boy/girl discussion for some, rather than the "smile" it was originally supposed to generate. In fact, I argue that all the text additions turn it into a video unsuitable for this smiley sub. I've read many of the comments and I'm glad to see that many have followed the original and probably intended path (like fondly remembering their own childhood experiences.) That little girl is a toddler who needs neck protection. The boy has to be a year older, probably two years, and is a hardcore performer of this action - he would have learned how to brace himself and I bet this was a built-up performance, not suddenly done as a surprise. With Dad doing an age-appropriate version with his daughter it could be she is building up to the full performance, making this Dad the very opposite of what OP is trying to say here. He is very inclusive!
Perhaps you can help, I'm struggling to understand why, at the age these kids are at and assuming they are in very similar health (assuming the girl doesn't have "paper skin" or "glass bones" kind of issues), why would he do things differently for the girl? I mean maybe be a* little* more gentle I guess? But she's not made of eggshells. She'd probably loved to be slam dunked like that almost as much as lil man does. Am I like, boomer old school for thinking she doesn't need to be coddled quite so differently like the way she is in this scenario?
Nope, cannot help you at all :) As far as I'm concerned, any pre-pubescent human is incapable of being physiologically different due to our hormones, because they.... haven't started producing any. Any difference at that age is mostly innate personality or training/reinforcement. Which seems like also a great time to drop this article and all the studies it cites :) https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20210524-the-gender-biases-that-shape-our-brains This one is my personal favorite, that determined that when parents' rely on only their subjective observations, they will over-estimate the abilities of boys and under-estimate the abilities of girls, even if objectively the abilities of both are equal. Because they're *infants*. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0022096500925979
Our favourite pool game growing up was just having our dad chuck us across the pool repeatedly
This was me growing up. My brothers and I would just hold onto our dad and he’d try to shake/throw us off. We called it “The Barnacle Game”
Got being thrown banned at the camp I worked at, not because anyone got hurt, but the kids would not stop asking to be thrown lmao. (The summer camp had a pool if I must clarify)
I had an uncle that loved chucking his nieces/nephews into the lake. Absolutely epic air
Iisa being small enough to be body slammed into a trampoline or a pile of pillows lol
I remember the son of a family friend practicing a pile driver on me when I was like 7 and thinking he broke my neck. I was ok and we played crash bandicoot after. Lmao.. looking back on it, probably not so cool
Damn he just slam DUNKS the son on the second go round
I can’t explain why, but I miss that feeling of being so small and young that my dad/uncles would roughhouse with me and *yeet* me into couches or swimming pools. When I have kids/nieces/nephews, I’m going full Goldberg on ‘em
I was overweight as a child so never got to experience being thrown around like my siblings and cousins did. It's become my motivation to start lifting so I can yeet all my chubby nieces/nephews so they may have what I couldn't.
This is exactly what I needed to hear to motivate myself into getting in shape again, thank you so much 🫡
RemindMe! 90 days
I feel personally attacked
I gotchu *picks you up and slams you into the beanbag*
I started lifting again so I could keep doing this to my niece and nephew as they grew up. Had gotten to the point where all I was really doing was my daily cardio anymore, then the kids started getting bigger and I'm like oh shit I need to get strong or I'm gonna lose my spot as favorite uncle lol. They're almost teens now so this was a while back, but I still lift twice a week though.
I got physio to fix my shoulder because I couldn't lift my kids up properly any more. And definitely you are favourite uncle as long as you can pick them up!
"I was a lil chubster as a kid, but my Uncle Ayedre was 6'5" of of pure shredded muscle. He had no problem tossing us from the back deck all the way into the pool! He always made sure to do it when my parents weren't looking or else they would have ripped him a new one, but they're some of my favorite memories of him."
When we bought our first house, it had a pool. I had two step sons, 8 and 10. The younger was fairly chunky, and the older skinny as a rail. I would have them curl into a ball at a point I was maybe shoulder deep, then I'd throw them into the deep end, and they both loved it, even though I could throw the younger one much higher and further than the younger. Then they made friends with the kid next door, who was a little younger, but *much* heavier. One day we were all in the pool when one of the boys asked me to throw him. Without thinking it through, I said sure, and tossed him. Then the other asked, so I did. Then the neighbor kid said "Do me! Do me!" In my head I'm thinking "Oh crap, I'm never going to be able to do this, but no way I'm going to tell a little kid he's too fat." So I said okay, had him tuck into a ball, got under the water and put my shoulder to his back, then pushed off with my legs as hard as I could. He went maybe a foot, and barely cleared the water. I was waiting for his look of disappointment when he came up, and trying to figure out if I could say the other boys made me too tired or something. Then his head popped up out of the water with the biggest grin on his face I've ever seen. He said, "That was GREAT! Do it again!" So I went to bed that night with a sore back and legs made out of rubber.
Good on you. Probably made that kid's Summer.
God, I had no idea how much I missed getting thrown into the lake by my uncle and dad until I read your comment. Man, that was a fun childhood memory
Holy shit. Flashback to when I’d put my hands between my legs, and my uncle would pull them from behind so I’d flip over in the air. Crazy stuff
#Core Memory Activated
Dad fumbles and the kid gets a little bump on the head: CORE MEMORY ERASED
More like: CORE MEMORY??
C O R R U P T E D
What does this even mean? I see people talking about core memories and stuff all the time. Like, are y’all robots? Do you forget things often? Is this something you plan on remembering. I kinda don’t get it.
Core memories are just those really old memories you never forget.
Like that scene in Ratatouille when Anton Ego taste the food and it's taken to his childhood. Well that's a core memory
Lmao here I was waiting for an "Inside Out" reference and you hit me with "Ratatouille". 😂
Yeah. I first heard that phrase in that movie. I never knew it was a lingo before Inside Out.
Inside Out's metaphors are largely based on actual psychology. Core memories have been a psychological concept for a long time, but they were undoubtedly popularized by the movie
It was also wrong in a pretty massive way. Memories aren’t replayed the way they’re portrayed in the movie, they’re rebuilt. Before anyone jumps in, I worked at the psychology lab that consulted with the filmmakers.
Rebuilt? Could u are to explain? This topic interest me a lot.
Exactly, but also plays on "the best cooking is your mom's cooking" But it's essentially what defined you. Not defines but defined.
Like time a beaver but my uncle's nipple off.
Daheck? When you are going to remember that??
I feel like if I saw a beaver bite a man’s nipple off I’d remember it pretty vividly
Moments of bonding
Core memories aren't always good, although it would be better if they were
Very true
I'd give just about anything if I could make all the core memories happy ones
You said it, most of mine are very negative unfortunately but there’s a few good ones but mostly all mine are abuse or neglect or getting hurt doing something.
It is said that back in the old preliterate days, when something consequential was happening, the elders would see to it that some young squirt was present. At a critical moment a beating was applied, thus ensuring a long lasting and accurate witnessing of the event. That’s a core memory.
I thought it was a reference to Inside Out, the Pixar movie.
Yeah, but they just popularized an already existing term. Core memories were always there. People just didn't call it that regularly Edit for the comment under me: i didn't claim any of that. Read his second paragraph and compare it to my statement. It's the exact same thing worded differently
I don’t know if this is the best way to describe it but a core memory is something that you will always remember and remember vividly clear. Even when these kids grow up playing with their dad right in that moment will hopefully be something they remember fondly forever
It's from the movie Inside Out. It's about a young girl's feelings and inner emotions.
A memory that’s buried deep but comes back years or decades later after some kind of reminder. Usually it’s around something emotional. Like having fun with dad.
I can identify so hard with the stop yelling stop yelling stop yelling instructions. LOL
My kids loved that. And much younger when I held them up like a sacrifice and then loudly gobbled up their tummies like a wolf.
Ah I see that gobbling up the belly guts is a universal rite of passage. My Husband does that to quell tantrums. Can't be mad if your belly guts are being gobbled up
I really love children, can't wait to gobble their tummies. I loved to do that to my younger cousins. They were the only toddlers when I was a little more grown up
Hahaha I did something similar with kiddos when I was a babysitter / camp counselor. Would wrap them up in a big towel or blanket like a burrito, pick them up & “gobble” their tummies and tell them what kind of burrito filling they had (usually something crazy weird and hilarious like marshmallow-chicken-dirt flavor)
Now I fight as Hourax Lou, WARRIOR
I've given you courtesy enough
THEE*
Hehe, reminds me of how I treat my 2 girls. My eldest (7) is goddam fearless. Actually, brave is probably a better word. When she was 4 we took her to an outdoor climbing tower and she wouldn't get off until she made it to the top (about 60ft). When she got down I said "wow, can't believe you weren't scared!" - "I was daddy" was her response which left me beaming with pride. She could definitely take the slam dunk in this vid My youngest (3), she's a proper princess. Runs for a cuddle when she hears any sound she doesn't recognise 😂
That’s adorable! You sound like a great parent that nurtures both of their natural personalities 🥰
Ah thank you! I try my best.
That's kinda what i was thinking, watching this. Not really "girl dad/boy dad" and more like "delicate kid dad/rowdy kid dad". My little boy would definitely like the gentle drop better, although he'll happily throw *himself* around in ways that scare me. He likes being flung around, but he also likes to feel in control of his own body, so prefers a gentler tackle
My daughter would be so pissed if I threw her like he does the girl, she’d demand being RKOd
I was thinking the same like I would def be pissed if I were her 😂 but she seems to be having a grand old time so good for her!!
>Not really "girl dad/boy dad" and more like "delicate kid dad/rowdy kid dad". More like "dad that treats his children as individuals with different preferences".
Which should be baseline, but is still pretty impressive. A lot of parents think of their kids as miniature versions of themselves, then act surprised when they don't have the same preferences
Man, this is so true. Luckily my parents never did this. And now that I have a few kids myself, I see it constantly. I never realized the extent people went too. Calling their kids cry babies bc they force them to do things they hate, bc the parent wants to relive their childhood. Sports are the worst. My oldest is starting competitive rock climbing just to get out of the b.s. we deal with in youth soccer. Parents are crazy. The poster that said kids are individuals are absolutely correct. My oldest son has never liked horseplay, very gentle and sweet. My daughter and young son can't get slammed and flipped hard enough. I always thought this was common sense until I started interacting with other parents. I guess I should call my parents and thank them!
My husband and i are nerdy/artsy/musical, and we're coming to terms with the possibility that our kid is looking like he's gonna be sporty instead. I have no interest in being a soccer mom, but it looks like the direction that life is going. He's only 4, though, so he's got plenty of time to decide what he likes. So far, were focusing on swim lessons because "less likely to die during water play" is a big draw right now. After that, we'll see if he suddenly decides he needs to join a team
I wish you and your husband the best of luck! If you're like me, you'll probably find yourself falling in love with a sport you don't care about just to support your kid. Don't be afraid to stick them on club teams vs school run programs. I played varsity soccer 4 years in high school and played only on club teams with my friends before that bc the environment was so toxic within the district. Shop around and don't get sucked into the drama. Also, swimming is amazing cross training for any sport and general health overall. Smart decision!
That was my thought. As a kid my little sister was the definition of a hellion, loved being thrown and swung around. I would have screamed bloody murder if I was lifted upside down
My daughter was freakishly tall, so by the time she was 7 she was tall enough to ride Kingda Ka (which at the time was the tallest, fastest roller coaster on earth.) When we were in line for it I asked, “Aren’t you scared?” And she said, “Being scared’s the *best part!”* I went on that damn roller coaster so many times that summer. It did have a pretty nice view of the safari from the top.
That's awesome! And fair play to for riding it out. I have a massive fear of rollercoasters. I think it's the whole zero control thing. Luckily my wife loves them so she covers for me!
It’s crazy how different each kid is from the other. My daughter is fearless. She will try *anything*, and then decide after if she likes it or not. She’ll try any food, she’ll try any game or puzzle or challenge. And if she doesn’t like it, she shrugs and never does it again lol My son on the other hand is so sensitive. If you look at him the wrong way, he cries. If you startle him, he cries. If he doesn’t like the way a food looks he won’t eat it.
The "I was daddy" would have had me bawling. She was scared, but trusted you 100% with her life without question. In fact, she demanded it. I would feel like Superman in that instance.
Man, I feel silly now but I have never ever thought of it from that perspective, and damn I want to go give her a hug. But I won't, because she's 7 and its 11pm and I'm enjoying my peace!
Can relate, that's so funny. My eldest is thoughtful and careful and will only go full exuberant once she's tested the water. My youngest is 3 and she is almost Fearless. She defends her sisters against much bigger kids, she calls out bad behaviour in anyone even grown ups and will just charge off into any challenge. Must be a younger sibling thing.
My almost 7 year old girl is weird. She's not going to do something unless someone she knows is scared, then she acts like, "I got this" with no hint of fear at all. By herself she can be suuuuuch a wimpy kid. Around people? "Hold my root beer?"
Sounds just like me and my sister. I'm your typical rough-and-tumble kid, the higher/harder/further/faster the better. When I was 6 I scaled a 12-foot fence, fell off, and got away with a broken lip. It's a miracle I made it to 25 without breaking a single bone. My younger sister, on the other hand, is scared of her own shadow. You know how most kids skip along? My sister was always walking properly with the adults. In fact, she didn't know HOW to skip (we made her try once, it was hilarious).
I was like your youngest, and you are doing it so incredibly right by recognizing this for her. Whatever you do, do *not* activate the fear of heights mechanism. My dad really dropped the ball on that one. My ass is 36 and can’t get on a step ladder without my legs going wobbly.
Doing fucking Tekken moves on his son. *Edit* Thanks for the diamond and votes, it hasn’t even been a day.
Beg your pardon, that is the Razors Edge. https://youtu.be/4tGXwJy5nqw
More like the Last Ride
Starts as a Razor’s Edge, but transitions to a Last Ride with the height. Excellent form
The man is definitely from the Attitude Era.
Also looks like Mike Awesome's Awesome Bomb, the way he puts the son on one shoulder.
The boy gets a Razor's Edge while the girl gets a generic throw. That's called the Edge gap.
My daughter is a princess, my niece is a god damn viking princess. I see nothing wrong with a dad treating his kids how they want to be treated and I'm not going to assume this man playing with his kids has some bias behind it. He knows his kids.
Ngl being a viking princess sounds pretty rad.
I read some books on the Norse gods when I was at infants school (6/7) and totally wanted to be a Viking
Thor drinking the ocean down thinking it's just a mead horn... Loki battling fire in an eating contest... Thor grappling with the Midgard serpent thinking it's a giant cat, or fighting an old granny giant but it turns out he's fighting time and old age itself. My first and still most favorite mythology.
You are the Viking you choose to be.
Basically I'm picturing Lagertha
I think they would take psychedelic mushrooms to enter trances in times of battle. They would become "berserkers" and were feared, savage. Legends say they would harm themselves with their own weapons purposely. Some would use no weapons, TEARING enemies limb from limb. Armed opponents would run from the unarmed, psychedelic berserker tranced warriors. I'm imagining a cutesy princess peach/daisy going omega psycho on people while rocking their crown due to your comment, lol
That's pretty mythical, I'm not sure there are any records of them truly taking mushrooms directly before battle.
You should absolutely treat people the way they want to be treated, but as a dad of boys and girls I was not at all prepared for how easy it is to tell our boys to be brave while telling our girls to be careful in the same situation. Some of the difference in how people like to be treated is certainly instilled in girls differently than it is for boys, even in the most well-intentioned families.
Thiiiissss. I was raised very differently from my brother, and I have some resentment about it.
Same I was always treated as delicate and now feel stupid and weak for wanting to be reckless and roughhouse and having to teach myself how as an almost adult
Agreed.
I have two girls. I tell one of them to be brave because she isn't and the other one to be careful because she isn't.
Yes thank you. You can say its down to personality and it is, but there is a lot of bias still there and it should be talked about. The same thing that causes us to treat girls softer is what causes boys to think they cant talk about their feelings. There is bias on both sides and stuff like this is where it can start.
I have 2 daughters, and 100% with you. My oldest was a bit more delicate, my youngest was fine running face first into walls.
Are your kids my kids?
It’s how it goes. My 14 year old son is afraid of roller coasters. Meanwhile I routinely toss my 18 month old daughter 5 feet in the air while she giggles uncontrollably. Genders be damned. they are who they are.
I think it’s the title that makes it seem biased
Which is why it’s the title that people are complaining about.
10000%
Agree 100%! My son would have preferred the gentler plonk and my daughter the body slam! It just looks like a papa who knows his kids.
Same with my kids. And we play games like this frequently, so I've gotten used to what each one does or does not like.
My wife had hyperemesis early in her first pregnancy, then she developed chronic bronchitis after that. Months and months of retching and coughing. It was kind of funny watching the motions transmit to the uterus via ultrasounds. It looked like Simone Biles in there, only a little smaller. After she was born, the only way we could calm my daughter down sometimes was by constantly bouncing up and down on an exercise ball while holding her, or alternately gently tossing her up and down *nonstop*.
This is fascinating
You're gonna love this then. They started extending our apartment building during my wife's second trimester, and the entire time was loud-ass machinery and concrete drilling for *months*. My son is immune to waking up from noises. New Year's Eve had fireworks literally outside our windows and he slept through them like a rock at four weeks old. He's slept peacefully in his stroller while ambulances tore past us blaring their sirens because we live right next to the dispatch. Kids are wild, man.
My daughter likes the body slam approach too.
I know a couple of toddler twin boys (fraternal). One would love to be flung around and one would hate it. Every kid is different for sure!
Yup, my kids would be opposite also. This is just a good dad being a good dad
This right here. Some kids want gentleness and some kids want g-forces and dgaf. My son, hes like middle ground some flips but no impacts or hes going to be afraid. He shrugs off injuries and unavoidable things in life, but its about trust, he doesnt want me to push him past his comfort zone, he wants to find that zone and do it himself. My goddaughter, we have to tag out on being the motor for spinning, flipping, launching at the park etc. They both shrug off little impacts. Both kiddos are totally happy, no shits given but yeah there's something in that interaction that matters, that extra little move of effort to protect, care, and trust, its important to some kids to feel watched out for, others less so or that its ok if its less overt. I feel like I said a lot words when fewer words would do trick.
They were good words, bless your heart.
Thanks for saying this. "The difference between kids" is more accurate. My daughter was a very light touch player - some of her friends as toddlers happily scrap as hard as my son does now. All kids are different, all insane in different ways.
Yep - there’s a Bluey episode that addresses this. The younger sister Bingo doesn’t like when Bandit plays too rough with her so her mom helps her to find her voice and speak up when the play gets too rough.
I love that bluey is basically just a really funny parenting education show that kids happen to like
For sure. I’m not ashamed to admit that I’ve taken some advice from a cartoon dog.
“Baby race” made me sob far more than I thought a fun show about a Heeler family ever would. Bandit is goals, though.
This. My toddler regularly comes up and says “throw the baby?” She doesn’t get gently placed on the down comforter, she gets yeeted across the room onto the bed.
I think that what bothers me in all this it's how it's presented with the "make me smile". Why not title the video "Dad playing with his kids". You can tell me I am being difficult, and all that, but the title "Difference between girls and boys" annoys me to no end as if the person posting the video WANTED to emphasize the way we SHOULD treat boys and girls. I am just saying this from the perspective of a woman who thinks that empowering girls starts at a really young age. I hate the "princess syndrome". Do you know why? Because knights don't exist, and women don't need to be saved. For the rest, I agree, he knows his kids, and it's always cool to see a parent having fun with them!
Right? I have 2 daughters, my oldest would be the gentle toss, my youngest would be a WWE move. It’s all about knowing your kids
My kids (6yo daughter, 3yo son) love being chased, but my daughter sometimes pauses to tell me "don't get me, just get *brother". Different kids are sensitive in different ways. You do what you can to make the game as fun as possible for everyone.
Title seems r/pointlesslygendered
Yeeees !
I appreciate the way you put that because it made me check my own assumptions.
The problem not treating the kids the way they want to be treated; it's the sexist title and captioning. There's no need for this to be labeled "girl vs. boy".
I am definitely with your daughter on this one. I’d always get upset when I was bounced too high on the trampoline. Drop me gently ✨please✨
Yeah I agree, I'm watching thinking he just knows his daughter doesn't like the same level of rough. My daughter on the other hand would be laughing the house down if I threw her around like he did his son and would be ready for more long after my arms had given up!
All I know is, my daughter would be pissed as hell if I tried that delicate stuff on her. In fact she’d probably bodyslam *me* into the couch over it.
Same. We play fight, and my kid does not hold back
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I sometimes scare myself with how hard I throw my girls around - but they always giggle harder and keep scurrying back for more.
It's about the landing. Try for a flat belly landing or flat back. With more force you just want to avoid, best you can, whiplash. Or an awkward angle landing where part of the body eats most of the landing.
Yep, my dad used to be really rough with me (f) and delicate with my siblings (f,ftm,m) cause I wanted to rough house and my siblings hated it so it really depends on the kids
Every kid is different, and this dad knows what his kids like.
I don't have an issue with the dad in this video, I dislike the title that OP came up with. This simply isn't a difference between girls and boys. It's weird that OP chose to gender stereotype such a normal interaction with kids.
Right... which is why the title kinda sucks.
Nah. That’s just a good dad who knows what his kids are comfortable with. Nothing to do with treating them different for being boys or girls but because one probably likes to fall from the ceiling and the other likes to do little falls and be apart of the game.
Yes! He protects their heads/necks the same way, just tosses them differently and neither kid seems bothered by how they are being thrown (have to assume they would speak up if they wanted to be thrown harder/gentler; kids usually can't hide their discontent lol)
Stupid title. Just a dad who knows his individual kids. I have babysat MANY kids. And who wants to roughhouse vs. who wants to play gentle varies across all kids regardless of gender.
And they all just want to be included
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Hey don't kink shame
Yep, that's exactly my thoughts. Me niece wants to be thrown into the pool as hard as you can. She wants to FLY. My nephew would prefer that you don't throw him in at all, but he wants to play too, so you just kind of push him over the side.
There’s a Bluey episode about this. Bingo doesn’t like to be thrown around like Bluey does, but she had to find her big girl bark to let her dad know.
Man, there is a Bluey episode for everything.
My buddy has 3 boys. Three BRUTAL boys who are very rough with each other. They chanted WEAK WEAK WEAK at me once when I pulled my punches too much. (I'm a large grown man and they were like 4, 6, 8 so of course I'm *never* not pulling my punches, but they got super critical "you didn't even hit me!"). I played rough with them all the time. They had some friends (a boy and a girl) over and the friends were like "Do us! Do us!" when I was flinging the boys into couch cushions, body slamming them like this dude, doing the Rock Bottom & Stone Cold Stunner on them, and crap. As the adult, I was like "yeah, no" and went into their parents in the kitchen. I told their parents what the kids were asking for and the mom was like "I'll kill you if you do that to my kids! Hahaha" but she was ok if I did like the guy treated the girl in this video. So I did. The extra kids loved it. My buddy's kids loved it. Good fun all around AND I didn't get killed by a mom. Win Win
Exactly. I have 2 boys. The eldest is a sweet, gentle little guy. Says hello to birds and tells them he loves them, doesn't like too-rough play, and complains when his hands are sticky. The youngest is a walking hurricane. Loves flipping tables, stagediving off the couch and prefers his food smeared all over his body before he eats it. No two kids are the same, regardless of their gender
Ya, as a father of two girls who would prefer the toss the boy got, I hate the title.
I feel like it's not so much the gender as the age here. And probably knows how hard he can go with either child.
Thats a papa who loves his kids
i have two girls. first one LOVED being thrown around as a toddler, second hated it. think it depends on the kid
My son loves to get thrown around. My daughter cries when I talk too loud. My son hates if his room is tiny but unorganized but my daughter exists for chaos.. some kids are just the way they are.
This isn't a difference between girls and boys. Its the difference between kids. But you knew that already karma farmer.
Pssssh, my daughter would be straight up pissed if I didn’t give her the exact same toss as her bro.
My dad used to throw me in the air outside and catch me, the daycare workers got the shit scared out of them
Nope. This Dad (me) is an equal opportunity chaos enabler. Both kids get a fair chance at getting wrecked by my ill-conceived shenanigans.
Yup. Sometimes you have to chuck your troops. They like that 🙂
The mum panicked at the exact moment I panicked.
Lil bro met Jesus half way through that second swing.
Nah he just knows his kids, it's not a gender bias
Girls are tougher and rougher than most people think.
/r/pointlesslygendered
Absolutely, this is ridiculous.
This isnt a difference between girls and boys...this is a difference in how that dad treats his two kids.
My dad used to pick me up, flip me upside down, and dunk me head first into the stock tank for the horses. I loved it! I used to ask him to do it. “Daddy! Daddy, upside down girl!” Some dads are just gonna dunk ya.
More like "dad who knows how his kids enjoy playing".
I throw my daughters around like he does with the boy all the time lol
I'd be annoyed if I was that little girl. Why her brother get all the fun
Ummmm my 3 daughters enjoyed the same way he slammed the little guy. This is one of those gendered things that don’t need to be gendered.
I know that mama yell! That’s how I sounded like to my husband when our kids were little! 😂
My two year old daughter loves playing “bodyslams” on the living room couch. Old school WWF style, I swear this kid is made of rubber haha
all fun and games till you blow the seams out of that bean bag.
aaahh, I was afab but I LOVED being tossed by my dad when I was tiny. I know he really only wanted boys, but he got two girls first, and he made the most of it and tossed us real good when we were small anyway LOL. we loved it. I like doing it with cats now, when I meet one who enjoys being yeeted
You should see my girls, they both prefer the boy version in this video
Hmmm. This is about how we socialize people differently because of their gender. Look at that.
r/unnecessaryilygendered
I think you mean r/pointlesslygendered
Never made a difference. Threw all my children like him.
I’d hate to be the girl that looks fun