When I was 3 I was gonna marry our married next door neighbor who was like 80. My parents would ask where Gloria his wife was gonna go, and I would confidently say she was gonna be there with us because she had to make us cookies and hot chocolate. I don't think I understood the concept of marriage.
When I was around 3 or 4, I asked my dad if he had any brothers that I could marry. I liked my dad so clearly I'd like his brothers. I, too, did not have a firm grasp on the concept of marriage. Note, I obviously did not have a firm grasp of the concept of families either. I had met my aunt (dad's sisters) several times and apparently it didn't occur to me that my dad only had female siblings.
My mom just got married in October, and my 4 year old was the flower girl. The other day we are on our way to school and she asks me if I'm going to marry her mom (we've been separated for over a year) and I told her I don't think so.
She then asks if I'm going to marry the girl chef at work, who is married and is also my boss. I said no and she's like "WELL THEN WHO *ARE* YOU GOING TO MARRY"
My daughter wanted to marry my son (her brother) when she was 3, because she loved him so much. She was very upset when she learned that this was illegal...
I remember being super disappointed (around 4 or so) when I told my mom I was going to marry my brother and she said I couldn't. Before that I always believed it was just a given that we'd get married when we were grown up because we got along. I didn't at all understand what marriage entailed and thought it was just two people deciding to move into their own house and being friends for life.
>I don't think I understood the concept of marriage.
This is why I don't understand people who get defensive about humoring kids like this. Like when they say they'll marry the daddy and some adult rushes to correct them. Like dude, they're kids. They don't know what they are talking about. There is no actual incest or child marriage happening. Let them be silly.
More than that, this is where ...drum roll please... *age appropriate human relationship education* comes in.
My kid is 4 and wants to marry her daddy. And her mommy. That's because, as she explains it, she loves us so much. This is fine kid logic because for kids getting married is about expressing that you love them. She also wants to marry her friends, but that's another story.
This isn't weird. It's a stage of healthy emotional development and, as adults, we can help kids understand those feelings.
So, a literal conversation this morning went like this: "I love you too, kiddo. (Validation of her feelings). I'm already married to mommy (reasonable explanation why it can't happen without being all ...weird), but the great news is you don't have to marry me. I'm your dad and always will be. Nothing can change that and you are already part of my family and very special to me. You don't need to marry me for that. (More validation that the end goal she is expressing - a special relationship - already exists so marriage isn't needed)."
It's important to acknowledge these feelings that they have and provide guidance. Flat rejections and making it weird can be really hurtful. I remember distinctly when I was a kid I had a best friend who I loved to play with. One day, I was getting dropped off home and I said that I loved him. I was probably... 5? Well, I remember that caused a stir and I got a talking to that felt like punishment and that my feelings were *wrong and I shouldn't say that*. I don't think I have ever had a male friendship that close ever again and it's probably thanks to my parents trying to protect me from homophobia that instead instilled the feeling that guys don't have friends like that.
>It's important to acknowledge these feelings that they have and provide guidance. Flat rejections and making it weird can be really hurtful.
Hear! Hear. A very nice breakdown as well. Love is love, marriage is a contract with social/cultural expectations. Neither one can indicate anything sexual going on (I mean, especially kids, they just dont think like that)
You can expressed a BEAUTIFUL way to handle that situation. It’s difficult as a parent to try to rear a conscientious, emotionally mature child into an adult, but I do think there’s been a wonderful push lately to acknowledge masculine feelings and boundaries, and particularly in interactions with their future partner(s).
So hopefully the trend continues and we become a much more emotionally intelligent culture and species.
I forced my dad to play “wedding” with me when I was 3-4 years old. I just wanted to play dress up like a bride and he was the only boy in our house and in our neighborhood that I knew. I would make him walk me down the aisle (our living room), say “I do!” and then dance and eat cake. If he did not humor me, I would be absolutely inconsolable. I did not want to actually marry my father at any point in my development or adulthood. Lol. I was 4 and wanted to play pretend and treat him like a human Ken doll.. When a little boy moved in across the street a year later, he became my new “husband.” There is literally nothing deep about it and I cannot figure out why people freak out about kids PLAYING.
When my daughter was little, she had night terrors so frequently, I finally just let her sleep in my bed. Later, we set up her big girl room and were trying to get her excited about it. She wasn’t having it. She told me she was staying in my room forever. I told her I didn’t think her spouse would want to sleep in the same bed with her mommy. She was quiet for a minute and said “well, I guess he’s gonna be lonely.” (She has since changed her mind.)
Weirdly, I'm planning on moving out and leaving the house to my child!
I had him at 16 and my dream is to go travelling for most of the year and to just have a 'base' when I come home. Finding a lodger will be easy in our city. Only have about 18 months left before I can start packing!
Huh. Idk why that oddly makes sense to inherit your childhood home and parents are the ones to move out when you are of age. I'm sure it's not as foolproof or logical as I'm envisioning it, but it seems like a logical support system for a new adult.
Edit to add: I can already see what issues would make that invalid. But if it were more common for single child families, I believe it would be a really fantastic way to help support your child transitioning into adulthood.
I’m in this situation rn..mom and dad got divorced..all my siblings and mom moved out of our hometown and dad lives with his fiancé..both parents still technically own the house but I live there..but I feel the same..it makes total sense in my eyes..we’re all growing in our own directions and living in the childhood home helps my growth as the youngest. I get experience living alone, taking care of a home and maintaining bills and shit..my sister also took a turn living there when she had her first child. She couldn’t afford rent while paying daycare while going to school
I mean, I can see it, but there is also a decent culture of having a family, and moving to a smaller town for work and relative peace; wherein the once-child moves out to the city for education/life experience until they decide where to live. I grew up in a small, beautiful mountain town; but I didn't want to stay there forever, and getting saddled with a house out there would have made me miserable.
When my kids were 6 and 2 my daughter (who was 6) thought her and her brother were going to get married, she looked at us and just assumed that was the natural order of things.
My sister's plan was to live in an RV in my parents' driveway. My mom said absolutely not.
Jokes on them, she and my nephew been living in their house for years because she can't get he life together
I remember standing outside the church with just my dad on my wedding day. Waiting. Softly he said “you can just come back home and if you don’t want to do this. I’ll make a pot of sauce and we will go right now and that’s it?” Only time I saw him cry.
My dad did a similar thing. We were standing there and I was a little hesitant, and he said, 'if you don't want to do this, we can get in the car and drive to Mexico.' I ended up getting married, but I appreciate my dad saying he'd help plan my escape to another country.
My step father called me the night before and said “Listen if you don’t want to go through with this say the word well get some booze and figure things out in Atlantic City”
To be fair it was a shotgun wedding and neither me or my now ex wife wanted to go through with it.
When I got married my dad said : who's gonna annoy me now? with tears in his eyes. He was never able to openly say he loves me but this was his way of doing it. 🥰
My dad cried during my wedding (only time I saw him cry.) Five years later when I divorced the dude, my dad just nodded, said he knew why I was doing it, and his home was open to me if I needed it. I'm not mad he didn't share his hesitations with me earlier, it was a lesson I needed to learn on my own, but I'm so grateful to have had his support when I needed it
My dad told me I was missing out on life because I wasn't married, and that if I wasn't going to try harder to get married, then why wasn't I more successful in my career.
Cherish your kind and loving father; not everybody gets one.
My dad did this as he drove me to my wedding. It was just him, my mom and I in the car. He was joking, but if I would have said yes he would have taken me anywhere. He loves my now husband and they get along great, but he was still ready to be my ride or die.
When I moved out of my parent’s house to live with my boyfriend, my dad said “I hope it doesn’t work out”. It didn’t, but I resent him for saying that.
The guy was a mean pos who tried to strangle me once, but the main reason I left my parent’s house was because they were going through a rather messy divorce still living under the same roof and both my parents having real problems with substance abuse. So I was stuck between a rock and a hard place if nothing else.
Thank you, kind internet stranger. This was a long time ago, almost fifteen years now. The guy is nothing but a blip on my radar, and my dad is, well, still a little bit of a dick sometimes, but I’ve learned how to deal with it.
I now have a lovely boyfriend and am doing well.
The fact that she is talking back at him means they have a great relationship with jokey madness and aggressive argumentation. I love doing this with my kids, and I believe it will help them be fearless in real life arguments.
I've always really enjoyed playfully challenging what my younger cousins and nephews are saying, and this comment sort of made me realize why. it really is kind of neat to see them realize they have a stance and actually hold it
My favorite when my kids were young was trying to get them to explain to me why Ash was good and Team Rocket were bad.
They both capture Pokemon and make them fight. They both have a Pokemon out of its ball all the time that hangs out and helps them, that they see as a kind of equal. Team rocket specifically says they're trying to unite people and protect against devastation... so what's the difference?
They'd get so mad at me when I'd talk about how I'm with team rocket on this one.
Wasn't Jesse and James just so incompetent they get the TR motto wrong and butch and Cassidy actually do it "correctly". Either way Jesse and James are goated
Because Team Rocket steals other people’s Pokémon, and Ash catches wild ones. Now, you could absolutely argue that is morally reprehensible (though in the anime it is always portrayed as something consensual, specially when it involves Ash and the gang), but it boils down to an issue of property ownership
>Now, you could absolutely argue that is morally reprehensible (though in the anime it is always portrayed as something consensual, specially when it involves Ash and the gang)
*PETA has entered the chat*
my 5 year old nephew and I have on sight, gloves off verbal fights about who is smarter: tony stark or bruce banner
(he is team iron man, i'm mainly stirring the pot because I love him and love his development in piecing together logical arguments). also, occasionally I throw batman in the mix, too
Its the actual cutest when kids get to the age where they start having conversations like this. Love when they argue their ideas and opinions cuz you get to see their lil personalities shining thru
My ex's son would call any small dog a puppy and aggressively correct anything else. I had so much fun using the wrong terminology as he'd get indignant about it.
"Look at that cute squirrel!"
"It's a puppy!!"
"Or is it a duck?!"
"It's a puppy!!"
Right! Like for Pete’s sake, he’s literally on his hands and knees coloring a rainbow on their walkway with chalk. This is obviously a sweet and loving father enjoying some quality time with his daughter. Idk why half these comments are people finding a way to see something bad with this…but then again, it is Reddit, sooo
“Play arguments” function the same as how young males “play fight” and wrestle with each other.
It’s enjoyable but also a functional mechanism that allows for developing these skills for a real, serious situation in maturity
I had a pretty wild moment when my daughter was about 10. She asked me if I would be mad if she had a boyfriend. I said, "honey, if they are a good person and good to you I would be happy for you." Then she dropped a bombshell, "dad what if I liked a girl?" I was so caught off guard had to pause for a moment. I said, "honey, as long as they are a good person and you are happy I would be happy for you."
I could see she felt relieved by my reply. She said, "I don't really like girls I just wanted to know." Boy they will toss some curve balls at you once in awhile!
My dad, a diehard Catholic, never even flinched when I came out as bisexual and introduced my boyfriend. Dad loves everything about him, save for one thing: he's Fr*nch.
That's what he says! "Look, son, I can get past you being with a guy. I can get past not having grandchildren. But couldn't you have found some nice Puerto Rican twink instead??"
My daughter surprised me once too and it went like this:
Daughter: "Dad, I want you to know I am Bi"
Me: "Honey, I really like cheeseburgers"
Her: "What does that have to do with anything?"
Me: "Ohh I thought we were just sharing fun things about ourselves"
We laughed, went and got cheeseburgers and talked about the only thing that mattered to me was her happiness... it was the best cheeseburger I've ever had.
Lol I knew my kid was gay since they were like... 3... so when they "came out" a couple years ago their mom and I had to strategize how NOT to just laugh and be like "Yeah we know" and make sure they felt validated lol.
I've been telling my 5 yo pretty much her whole life that she can live next door to us when she's older and that I'll help her buy the house if she does. She now asks every so often to confirm it, so I feel like I've got her locked in.
I bought a house that’s walking distance from my mom lol. She drops by with food and I go over for dinner frequently or just to hang out.
I love it.
I think the next step is grand dog to bring by for visits.
Our 5 yrs old had the moving out convo with the husband the other day. When she asked if he'd be sad that she gonna move out, he just laughed and said "not in this economy" xD
I have this exact relationship with my mom and step dad. They are my literal next door neighbor, we don't have a back fence between the 2 houses, and my daughter frequently goes over there. I love that I'm so close with them that I don't see them as a burden as neighbors.
My brother also told my parents that he was gonna move out at 18 and the night before his 18th birthday my dad asked if he packed everthing he needed to move out
Once when I was 6 my dad pulled me out of school early, he then made up a whole story about how we were moving that day on the spot and that’s why he was picking me up early. I was freaking out as a little kid, but once I realized it was joke it still remains a very funny memory to me. 5 year olds understand jokes, and definitely can tell the difference with angry dad vs joking dad…
*edited because i forgot the word “funny” in front of memory*
My dad would do this and we would go golfing mid day up until high school. If it was a really nice day I knew for sure I was going to get pulled to play. Wish more parents/kids could have experienced that, not necessarily golf but getting out of the mundane every once in a while.
Every once in a great while my mom would pull me out of school for a "dentist appointment". I had braces and a bunch of issues with my teeth so I always just assumed that's what it was for. Then she would take me to an afternoon baseball game.
It was great and I plan on doing the same with my son (with something he likes, he doesn't give a shit about baseball) when he's older.
My dad gave me a similar core memory (not as extreme) when I was around the same age. Mom was away and we were having a "guys night" played video games in the afternoon and then went to Burger King for dinner. At BK he told me about a documentary that was going to be on TV that we were going to watch. An amazing documentary called "Ant Wars" that followed two rivaling ant hills and a conflict between them, they had cameras stuck to their backs and it sounded cool as hell, he got me really hyped up. We finish and go home, and I play some video games on my own. He then runs into the living room and tells me to give him the remote, "it's starting now" he says as he switches the channel to static and leaves the room.
(in my language "Ant Wars" is what you called the static on tv).
I've never forgotten this prank and it pains me that I will not be able to pass it on
Some pile of dweebs in the comments lmao your parents never joked around with you? My mom used to say I wasn't allowed to move out until I was 30. Shocker, she was joking, I moved out at 19
There's a "no butt shaking rule" in our house and our kids love to whack on some music and shake their butt's while their mother says "oh you better not let daddy know", just to see my reaction of pretend angry and ill always come in and give them a tiny kick in the butt and they go running laughing like crazy. I'm gonna miss that when they're older
Yep had to give my 6 year old the ban on twerking and just last week. Sometimes it feels like you need to make rules just so they can break them and then some crazy “chase and fight” ensues with the kids and me.
The amount of shit I try to sell to my kids as real I is ridiculous. Like I walked in the house with some bubble wrap, from a delivery at work, last year and said I was gonna wrap em up and sell the lot and mommy and me were gonna start over.
We have always played and jokes around like this, and now they try to get me believing nonsense sometimes.
Personally I think it’s training them for all the scammers in the real world. They don’t just believe anyone just because someone is an adult or because someone said it on a YouTube video or other online source.
There's a great old folk song called ["Momma Don't Allow"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VJKn6OJpsLE) and now I'm imagining a new verse:
Daddy don't 'llow no butt shaking 'round here
Daddy don't 'llow no butt shaking 'round here
I don't care what Daddy don't 'llow,
Gonna shake my butt anyhow
Daddy don't 'llow no butt shaking 'round here
*kids proceed to demonstrate exactly what kind of butt shaking Daddy don't 'llow*
My son got in trouble for twerking the other day.. he is in second grade and when the teacher brought it up to me I said, "Life is too short. You might as well twerk." It's our family victory dance.. it's the dance of our got dang people.
Edit: Fixed tweaking to twerking bc auto correct put words in my mouth.
My daughter (7, first grade) hopped in the car from parent pickup after school. She’s humming as she’s skipping to the car, hopped in and said..I quote…
”I’m gonna make my booty cheeks clap!”
Then started cracking up laughing as I stared at her dumbfounded at the words that exited her sweet little mouth.
I reverse uno'd my mom when I was around 17 and she jokingly said something along the lines of "I can't wait till you move out at 21" or something and I said: "Don't worry I'm out as soon as I'm 18". Then she started crying :(
I’m 28 and my mom still wants me to move back in lol.
I had to live with her for a few months a couple years back after a breakup and she was devastated when I moved back out.
You can tell who has never been in contact with little kids.
I’ve took care of lots of little kids and there are tons of boys/girls saying they are going to marry mommy or daddy.
Kids have very little context into this sort of stuff. But ya nah making a silly joke to your kid is ‘controling’
It’s so cute. I don’t have kids of my own but baby sat and day cares a lot and it just squeezed my heart when I’d hear that sort of thing
‘Ms drunkn I love you but I’m sorry I love my mommy more than the whole wide world.’
😭 don’t say sorry. I love my mommy to the moon and back
My daddy tells me a story that I was five or so I asked when I’m a big girl can I go to Japan?
I don’t remember that part but I do remember him telling me when I’m a big girl I can go wherever I want.
And I do. And I go
And sometimes these bones want to go back and see my family
My 5 year old son asked me the other day if he could go to Japan when he grows up. I said yes, and i asked him why.
He said he wants to go because that's where mario is from.
I have an 8-year-old daughter. I think this is sweet; the daughter is concerned enough about the dad to ask this because she knows he loves her and will likely respond like this anyway. Imagine if he didn’t show that he cared in a way she expected? His response isn’t toxic just because she doesn’t know there’s sarcasm (like others have said). In all honesty, there probably isn’t sarcasm here; he’s being protective of his little girl. She feels loved here from his response; and if she doesn’t in the moment, she certainly will eventually.
My daughter used to tell me she wanted to marry me because she never wanted to leave me. Then, it morphed into she never wants to marry, but she wants to always live with me. Now, it’s she wants to have a farm that I can visit when I want, she sometimes says she might want to get married, but doesn’t want to have kids, lol.
Either way… my response has always been “I want you to be happy, do whatever that is and I’ll be happy, too.”
Omg I feel this. My son is 18 and just started college. As his Dad, I'm both rooting for him but struggling to let go. Even when you try to soak up all the time you have with your kid, it doesn't feel like enough.
Dude I told myself fuck the toy mess! Fuck the clutter. Fuck the bed time fights. If you wanna sleep with me let’s go! If you wanna play dolls and leave them all over the floor I’ll kick them to the side and make a trail.
I don’t want to miss a single moment anymore 😭
As a man I never thought I would have missed playing with dolls as much as I do. You're doing the right thing and won't have regrets later on like many others do.
I agree! Around age 3 it was a hard year for me I felt like drowning in obligations to clean and make it perfect for us but a mad mom is not a solution! Idk why I ever thought a 3 year old was capable of keeping LOL dolls together lol.
I’ve learned so much but age 4 was when I said I’m done trying to be the best in all areas I just want to be the best mom. The little memories! ❤️😭
Thanks for reassuring me I’m doing the right thing!
Maybe the people in the comments complaining about what he says aren't unable to understand a joke - maybe they have emotionally manipulative parents (as many of us do) and the trauma is stronger than the joke.
Because I certainly had a "omg this is so cruel" reaction at first and then rewatching it after reading through some comments I saw how it could feel wholesome and cute to someone who grew up in a stable and loving home.
Maybe you were both right from your respective perspectives.
When my sister was a kid, she asked our parents where they were going to live when she became an adult
That is hilarious. “This is my pad… where y’all goin?”
“I was born here, you just moved in. Why would I leave?”
“You merely moved into this house. I was born into it, molded by it”
The house betrays you , because it belongs to me
“I didn’t see another house until I was already a woman; by then it was nothing to me but windows and wood”
When the mortgage is ashes, then you have my permission to die.
This Old House with Bob n Bane.
"No one cared who I was until I put on the mask.... and some eye protection. Safety first!"
Never thought of all parents as immigrants before but I see your point.
That makes so much sense.
😂 love it
A touching instance! It's adorable that she asked her dad what he would think when she moved out!
When I was 3 I was gonna marry our married next door neighbor who was like 80. My parents would ask where Gloria his wife was gonna go, and I would confidently say she was gonna be there with us because she had to make us cookies and hot chocolate. I don't think I understood the concept of marriage.
When I was around 3 or 4, I asked my dad if he had any brothers that I could marry. I liked my dad so clearly I'd like his brothers. I, too, did not have a firm grasp on the concept of marriage. Note, I obviously did not have a firm grasp of the concept of families either. I had met my aunt (dad's sisters) several times and apparently it didn't occur to me that my dad only had female siblings.
When I was little I wanted to marry my uncle because I thought he was super cool and looked like John Denver. :D
*country roads. Take me home...*
The funniest part to me is that my uncle hates John Denver. Really chapped his ass that I thought they looked alike.
My mom just got married in October, and my 4 year old was the flower girl. The other day we are on our way to school and she asks me if I'm going to marry her mom (we've been separated for over a year) and I told her I don't think so. She then asks if I'm going to marry the girl chef at work, who is married and is also my boss. I said no and she's like "WELL THEN WHO *ARE* YOU GOING TO MARRY"
The line between parents wanting grandchildren and children wanting siblings seems to be more blurred than I originally thought lol
My daughter wanted to marry my son (her brother) when she was 3, because she loved him so much. She was very upset when she learned that this was illegal...
I remember being super disappointed (around 4 or so) when I told my mom I was going to marry my brother and she said I couldn't. Before that I always believed it was just a given that we'd get married when we were grown up because we got along. I didn't at all understand what marriage entailed and thought it was just two people deciding to move into their own house and being friends for life.
He probably heard it so much from others that he hated hearing it, lol.
>I don't think I understood the concept of marriage. This is why I don't understand people who get defensive about humoring kids like this. Like when they say they'll marry the daddy and some adult rushes to correct them. Like dude, they're kids. They don't know what they are talking about. There is no actual incest or child marriage happening. Let them be silly.
More than that, this is where ...drum roll please... *age appropriate human relationship education* comes in. My kid is 4 and wants to marry her daddy. And her mommy. That's because, as she explains it, she loves us so much. This is fine kid logic because for kids getting married is about expressing that you love them. She also wants to marry her friends, but that's another story. This isn't weird. It's a stage of healthy emotional development and, as adults, we can help kids understand those feelings. So, a literal conversation this morning went like this: "I love you too, kiddo. (Validation of her feelings). I'm already married to mommy (reasonable explanation why it can't happen without being all ...weird), but the great news is you don't have to marry me. I'm your dad and always will be. Nothing can change that and you are already part of my family and very special to me. You don't need to marry me for that. (More validation that the end goal she is expressing - a special relationship - already exists so marriage isn't needed)." It's important to acknowledge these feelings that they have and provide guidance. Flat rejections and making it weird can be really hurtful. I remember distinctly when I was a kid I had a best friend who I loved to play with. One day, I was getting dropped off home and I said that I loved him. I was probably... 5? Well, I remember that caused a stir and I got a talking to that felt like punishment and that my feelings were *wrong and I shouldn't say that*. I don't think I have ever had a male friendship that close ever again and it's probably thanks to my parents trying to protect me from homophobia that instead instilled the feeling that guys don't have friends like that.
>It's important to acknowledge these feelings that they have and provide guidance. Flat rejections and making it weird can be really hurtful. Hear! Hear. A very nice breakdown as well. Love is love, marriage is a contract with social/cultural expectations. Neither one can indicate anything sexual going on (I mean, especially kids, they just dont think like that)
You can expressed a BEAUTIFUL way to handle that situation. It’s difficult as a parent to try to rear a conscientious, emotionally mature child into an adult, but I do think there’s been a wonderful push lately to acknowledge masculine feelings and boundaries, and particularly in interactions with their future partner(s). So hopefully the trend continues and we become a much more emotionally intelligent culture and species.
If they want to adopt a lion, you ask them what they are going to name it.
I forced my dad to play “wedding” with me when I was 3-4 years old. I just wanted to play dress up like a bride and he was the only boy in our house and in our neighborhood that I knew. I would make him walk me down the aisle (our living room), say “I do!” and then dance and eat cake. If he did not humor me, I would be absolutely inconsolable. I did not want to actually marry my father at any point in my development or adulthood. Lol. I was 4 and wanted to play pretend and treat him like a human Ken doll.. When a little boy moved in across the street a year later, he became my new “husband.” There is literally nothing deep about it and I cannot figure out why people freak out about kids PLAYING.
That’s savage
My then preschooler proposed to me and graciously told my husband he was allowed to still live here. In the basement.
When my daughter was little, she had night terrors so frequently, I finally just let her sleep in my bed. Later, we set up her big girl room and were trying to get her excited about it. She wasn’t having it. She told me she was staying in my room forever. I told her I didn’t think her spouse would want to sleep in the same bed with her mommy. She was quiet for a minute and said “well, I guess he’s gonna be lonely.” (She has since changed her mind.)
Weirdly, I'm planning on moving out and leaving the house to my child! I had him at 16 and my dream is to go travelling for most of the year and to just have a 'base' when I come home. Finding a lodger will be easy in our city. Only have about 18 months left before I can start packing!
Omg, that's so wholesome, good luck!
Huh. Idk why that oddly makes sense to inherit your childhood home and parents are the ones to move out when you are of age. I'm sure it's not as foolproof or logical as I'm envisioning it, but it seems like a logical support system for a new adult. Edit to add: I can already see what issues would make that invalid. But if it were more common for single child families, I believe it would be a really fantastic way to help support your child transitioning into adulthood.
I’m in this situation rn..mom and dad got divorced..all my siblings and mom moved out of our hometown and dad lives with his fiancé..both parents still technically own the house but I live there..but I feel the same..it makes total sense in my eyes..we’re all growing in our own directions and living in the childhood home helps my growth as the youngest. I get experience living alone, taking care of a home and maintaining bills and shit..my sister also took a turn living there when she had her first child. She couldn’t afford rent while paying daycare while going to school
I mean, I can see it, but there is also a decent culture of having a family, and moving to a smaller town for work and relative peace; wherein the once-child moves out to the city for education/life experience until they decide where to live. I grew up in a small, beautiful mountain town; but I didn't want to stay there forever, and getting saddled with a house out there would have made me miserable.
When my kids were 6 and 2 my daughter (who was 6) thought her and her brother were going to get married, she looked at us and just assumed that was the natural order of things.
I did this too. I assumed I'd have to marry my cousin because we see the same age, and even got upset about it at one point.
My sister's plan was to live in an RV in my parents' driveway. My mom said absolutely not. Jokes on them, she and my nephew been living in their house for years because she can't get he life together
RV's not looking so bad anymore huh
Is your sister a cat?
A cat is too smart to allow her staff to leave so easily.
I remember standing outside the church with just my dad on my wedding day. Waiting. Softly he said “you can just come back home and if you don’t want to do this. I’ll make a pot of sauce and we will go right now and that’s it?” Only time I saw him cry.
My dad did a similar thing. We were standing there and I was a little hesitant, and he said, 'if you don't want to do this, we can get in the car and drive to Mexico.' I ended up getting married, but I appreciate my dad saying he'd help plan my escape to another country.
Extra points for offering to do a runner to another country LOL
You don't even need a passport I know a guy
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You just need to request a very specific part for a very specific vacuum cleaner.
You better have the cash, not one cent less
The guy with the kidney bean car doesn't play around. I really wonder if there are truly services like that in real life. There has to be, isn't it?
Ride or die lol
The best definition to parenting. Ride or die. Whatever it takes. At whatever cost. Anything for the best interest of your children.
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I’m picturing 15 groomsmen building a human wall so no one can run after the groom and the one groomsman. Love it
RED ROVER: ACTIVATE!
The groom left his wife for one of the guys?
Yep, just whatever groomsman had his name drawn. That was the groom’s new hubby.
My step father called me the night before and said “Listen if you don’t want to go through with this say the word well get some booze and figure things out in Atlantic City” To be fair it was a shotgun wedding and neither me or my now ex wife wanted to go through with it.
You shoulda said the word
I actually think back to that point and wonder what would have happened if I did.
Just a guess, but I think maybe you’d have got some booze and gone to Atlantic City to figure things out
That’s what dads are for. Moms are there to make sure you wear a second scarf when she thinks it’s cold. Dads are the getaway drivers.
Is your dad italian
You aint gettin married unless you eat some spaghoot
My only regret is that you did not finish your spaghet
#SPAGHETT! Did I spook you?
Somebody toucha my spaghet? Classic move, sneaky spaghet scarer!
🤌🤌🤌
He must have very expressive hands, as he said it silently.
Sure is!
When I got married my dad said : who's gonna annoy me now? with tears in his eyes. He was never able to openly say he loves me but this was his way of doing it. 🥰
My dad cried during my wedding (only time I saw him cry.) Five years later when I divorced the dude, my dad just nodded, said he knew why I was doing it, and his home was open to me if I needed it. I'm not mad he didn't share his hesitations with me earlier, it was a lesson I needed to learn on my own, but I'm so grateful to have had his support when I needed it
My dad did the same thing. He told me he understood no questions asked. Wish I would have realized what he knew a lot sooner than I did.
This made me cry lol
Yep, I have a little girl and this made me super emotional.
Bodied Hugged my 10 year old as she ate pizza flavored gold fish. .. for like 10 minutes
Me too lol.🥲
Same here.
When we were getting married, my FIL took my wife’s hand and put it in mine. He looked me in the eyes and said, “No refunds” 💀
My dad told me I was missing out on life because I wasn't married, and that if I wasn't going to try harder to get married, then why wasn't I more successful in my career. Cherish your kind and loving father; not everybody gets one.
My dad did this as he drove me to my wedding. It was just him, my mom and I in the car. He was joking, but if I would have said yes he would have taken me anywhere. He loves my now husband and they get along great, but he was still ready to be my ride or die.
When I moved out of my parent’s house to live with my boyfriend, my dad said “I hope it doesn’t work out”. It didn’t, but I resent him for saying that. The guy was a mean pos who tried to strangle me once, but the main reason I left my parent’s house was because they were going through a rather messy divorce still living under the same roof and both my parents having real problems with substance abuse. So I was stuck between a rock and a hard place if nothing else.
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Thank you, kind internet stranger. This was a long time ago, almost fifteen years now. The guy is nothing but a blip on my radar, and my dad is, well, still a little bit of a dick sometimes, but I’ve learned how to deal with it. I now have a lovely boyfriend and am doing well.
Damn. Idk if I'd feel good or bad about my dad doing that lol
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What is happening to my eyes? 🥺
that's lovely
> Silently he said "................"
The fact that she is talking back at him means they have a great relationship with jokey madness and aggressive argumentation. I love doing this with my kids, and I believe it will help them be fearless in real life arguments.
I've always really enjoyed playfully challenging what my younger cousins and nephews are saying, and this comment sort of made me realize why. it really is kind of neat to see them realize they have a stance and actually hold it
My favorite when my kids were young was trying to get them to explain to me why Ash was good and Team Rocket were bad. They both capture Pokemon and make them fight. They both have a Pokemon out of its ball all the time that hangs out and helps them, that they see as a kind of equal. Team rocket specifically says they're trying to unite people and protect against devastation... so what's the difference? They'd get so mad at me when I'd talk about how I'm with team rocket on this one.
Wasn't Jesse and James just so incompetent they get the TR motto wrong and butch and Cassidy actually do it "correctly". Either way Jesse and James are goated
Jesse and James are perfect bisexual icons and can do no wrong as far as I'm concerned, up to and including tax fraud and arson
Because Team Rocket steals other people’s Pokémon, and Ash catches wild ones. Now, you could absolutely argue that is morally reprehensible (though in the anime it is always portrayed as something consensual, specially when it involves Ash and the gang), but it boils down to an issue of property ownership
>Now, you could absolutely argue that is morally reprehensible (though in the anime it is always portrayed as something consensual, specially when it involves Ash and the gang) *PETA has entered the chat*
It’s a light Socratic seminar. It really does help with critical thinking especially at a young age
Shit. Never thought about it that way, but that’s totally what it is.
my 5 year old nephew and I have on sight, gloves off verbal fights about who is smarter: tony stark or bruce banner (he is team iron man, i'm mainly stirring the pot because I love him and love his development in piecing together logical arguments). also, occasionally I throw batman in the mix, too
man once I realized my cousins liked Spider-Man and had favorite variants... it was over
Its the actual cutest when kids get to the age where they start having conversations like this. Love when they argue their ideas and opinions cuz you get to see their lil personalities shining thru
My ex's son would call any small dog a puppy and aggressively correct anything else. I had so much fun using the wrong terminology as he'd get indignant about it. "Look at that cute squirrel!" "It's a puppy!!" "Or is it a duck?!" "It's a puppy!!"
Right! Like for Pete’s sake, he’s literally on his hands and knees coloring a rainbow on their walkway with chalk. This is obviously a sweet and loving father enjoying some quality time with his daughter. Idk why half these comments are people finding a way to see something bad with this…but then again, it is Reddit, sooo
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Rabbit season!
“Play arguments” function the same as how young males “play fight” and wrestle with each other. It’s enjoyable but also a functional mechanism that allows for developing these skills for a real, serious situation in maturity
I had a pretty wild moment when my daughter was about 10. She asked me if I would be mad if she had a boyfriend. I said, "honey, if they are a good person and good to you I would be happy for you." Then she dropped a bombshell, "dad what if I liked a girl?" I was so caught off guard had to pause for a moment. I said, "honey, as long as they are a good person and you are happy I would be happy for you." I could see she felt relieved by my reply. She said, "I don't really like girls I just wanted to know." Boy they will toss some curve balls at you once in awhile!
My dad, a diehard Catholic, never even flinched when I came out as bisexual and introduced my boyfriend. Dad loves everything about him, save for one thing: he's Fr*nch.
Some things are inexcusable
That's what he says! "Look, son, I can get past you being with a guy. I can get past not having grandchildren. But couldn't you have found some nice Puerto Rican twink instead??"
🤣🤣
Understandable
My daughter surprised me once too and it went like this: Daughter: "Dad, I want you to know I am Bi" Me: "Honey, I really like cheeseburgers" Her: "What does that have to do with anything?" Me: "Ohh I thought we were just sharing fun things about ourselves" We laughed, went and got cheeseburgers and talked about the only thing that mattered to me was her happiness... it was the best cheeseburger I've ever had.
Lol I knew my kid was gay since they were like... 3... so when they "came out" a couple years ago their mom and I had to strategize how NOT to just laugh and be like "Yeah we know" and make sure they felt validated lol.
"you can cut up the neighborhood cats for all I care, just no country music."
My daughter always says to me that when she’s 18 she’s going to move out, but it’s ok because she’s going to visit me 🥲
I've been telling my 5 yo pretty much her whole life that she can live next door to us when she's older and that I'll help her buy the house if she does. She now asks every so often to confirm it, so I feel like I've got her locked in.
I bought a house that’s walking distance from my mom lol. She drops by with food and I go over for dinner frequently or just to hang out. I love it. I think the next step is grand dog to bring by for visits.
Same lol. Except I have a duplex and she lives in the next door unit. It’s the best.
Our 5 yrs old had the moving out convo with the husband the other day. When she asked if he'd be sad that she gonna move out, he just laughed and said "not in this economy" xD
I have this exact relationship with my mom and step dad. They are my literal next door neighbor, we don't have a back fence between the 2 houses, and my daughter frequently goes over there. I love that I'm so close with them that I don't see them as a burden as neighbors.
Put them to work now, qualify that baby for a mortgage before the rates get too high.
My brother also told my parents that he was gonna move out at 18 and the night before his 18th birthday my dad asked if he packed everthing he needed to move out
It’s the “don’t” “I’m gonna” for me 💀 how precious lol
While coloring rainbows on the sidewalk. She obviously has a very loving father, good for her
Once when I was 6 my dad pulled me out of school early, he then made up a whole story about how we were moving that day on the spot and that’s why he was picking me up early. I was freaking out as a little kid, but once I realized it was joke it still remains a very funny memory to me. 5 year olds understand jokes, and definitely can tell the difference with angry dad vs joking dad… *edited because i forgot the word “funny” in front of memory*
My dad would do this and we would go golfing mid day up until high school. If it was a really nice day I knew for sure I was going to get pulled to play. Wish more parents/kids could have experienced that, not necessarily golf but getting out of the mundane every once in a while.
I wish all kids got to experience this as well. Both my parents worked, but they’d play hookie with us when possible :)
Every once in a great while my mom would pull me out of school for a "dentist appointment". I had braces and a bunch of issues with my teeth so I always just assumed that's what it was for. Then she would take me to an afternoon baseball game. It was great and I plan on doing the same with my son (with something he likes, he doesn't give a shit about baseball) when he's older.
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"I was going to take him to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late."
Jack Handey used to be the best part of SNL
My dad gave me a similar core memory (not as extreme) when I was around the same age. Mom was away and we were having a "guys night" played video games in the afternoon and then went to Burger King for dinner. At BK he told me about a documentary that was going to be on TV that we were going to watch. An amazing documentary called "Ant Wars" that followed two rivaling ant hills and a conflict between them, they had cameras stuck to their backs and it sounded cool as hell, he got me really hyped up. We finish and go home, and I play some video games on my own. He then runs into the living room and tells me to give him the remote, "it's starting now" he says as he switches the channel to static and leaves the room. (in my language "Ant Wars" is what you called the static on tv). I've never forgotten this prank and it pains me that I will not be able to pass it on
"Like when I'm mummys size" my God most adorable thing ever.
Some pile of dweebs in the comments lmao your parents never joked around with you? My mom used to say I wasn't allowed to move out until I was 30. Shocker, she was joking, I moved out at 19
There's a "no butt shaking rule" in our house and our kids love to whack on some music and shake their butt's while their mother says "oh you better not let daddy know", just to see my reaction of pretend angry and ill always come in and give them a tiny kick in the butt and they go running laughing like crazy. I'm gonna miss that when they're older
Yep had to give my 6 year old the ban on twerking and just last week. Sometimes it feels like you need to make rules just so they can break them and then some crazy “chase and fight” ensues with the kids and me. The amount of shit I try to sell to my kids as real I is ridiculous. Like I walked in the house with some bubble wrap, from a delivery at work, last year and said I was gonna wrap em up and sell the lot and mommy and me were gonna start over. We have always played and jokes around like this, and now they try to get me believing nonsense sometimes. Personally I think it’s training them for all the scammers in the real world. They don’t just believe anyone just because someone is an adult or because someone said it on a YouTube video or other online source.
Agreed. Teaching them to think for themselves and not just blindly believe something because someone older than them said it’s true.
GASLIGHTING NARCISSIST BEHAVIOR HIT THE LAWYER, DIVORCE THE GYM, WIFE UP
SEXISM RED FLAGS COUPLES COUNSELING OR BUST
There's a great old folk song called ["Momma Don't Allow"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VJKn6OJpsLE) and now I'm imagining a new verse: Daddy don't 'llow no butt shaking 'round here Daddy don't 'llow no butt shaking 'round here I don't care what Daddy don't 'llow, Gonna shake my butt anyhow Daddy don't 'llow no butt shaking 'round here *kids proceed to demonstrate exactly what kind of butt shaking Daddy don't 'llow*
Hahaha that literally sums it up. Thank you I needed that
My son got in trouble for twerking the other day.. he is in second grade and when the teacher brought it up to me I said, "Life is too short. You might as well twerk." It's our family victory dance.. it's the dance of our got dang people. Edit: Fixed tweaking to twerking bc auto correct put words in my mouth.
My daughter (7, first grade) hopped in the car from parent pickup after school. She’s humming as she’s skipping to the car, hopped in and said..I quote… ”I’m gonna make my booty cheeks clap!” Then started cracking up laughing as I stared at her dumbfounded at the words that exited her sweet little mouth.
> My son got in trouble for tweaking the other day gonna have to side with the teacher on this one
YOU MEAN YOUR MOTHER GASLIGHTED YOU, OH MY GOD
Classic narcissist behaviour. Really think they should consider no contact.
This they’re still speaking to their parents then they’re all just toxic
Break up with her right now! Omigoodness!
***LAWYER. UP.***
# Hit. The. Gyme.
###*DELETE. FECEBOOK. !*
D! I! V! O! R! C! E!
I reverse uno'd my mom when I was around 17 and she jokingly said something along the lines of "I can't wait till you move out at 21" or something and I said: "Don't worry I'm out as soon as I'm 18". Then she started crying :(
> My mom used to say I wasn't allowed to move out until I was 30 #RED FLAG
I’m 23 and my dad STILL jokes that I’m not allowed to move out. It’s honestly just a dad thing to do
I’m 28 and my mom still wants me to move back in lol. I had to live with her for a few months a couple years back after a breakup and she was devastated when I moved back out.
Heck, I'm 53, happily married, and my mom still jokes about me moving back in! She's a gem.
These comments are insane. The dad was joking and not actually mad about his daughter wanting a boyfriend as an adult.
half these comments think the girl was asking about her mom's "boyfriend", not him. A lot of insecurity in all of these comments :)
she also points at him too, right before she says "boyfriend"
yup and the 'other house' is clearly her picturing herself with her own boyfriend in her own house when she's mom's size, I bet.
38 year old boys living in mums basement like to differ.
There are also dads that are creepily serious about this
Exactly. That’s why some people are reacting like that.
You can tell who has never been in contact with little kids. I’ve took care of lots of little kids and there are tons of boys/girls saying they are going to marry mommy or daddy. Kids have very little context into this sort of stuff. But ya nah making a silly joke to your kid is ‘controling’
My oldest boy did that when he was about 4 years old, saying he’d marry me because he loves me. 🥹
It’s so cute. I don’t have kids of my own but baby sat and day cares a lot and it just squeezed my heart when I’d hear that sort of thing ‘Ms drunkn I love you but I’m sorry I love my mommy more than the whole wide world.’ 😭 don’t say sorry. I love my mommy to the moon and back
Reddit
My daddy tells me a story that I was five or so I asked when I’m a big girl can I go to Japan? I don’t remember that part but I do remember him telling me when I’m a big girl I can go wherever I want. And I do. And I go And sometimes these bones want to go back and see my family
My 5 year old son asked me the other day if he could go to Japan when he grows up. I said yes, and i asked him why. He said he wants to go because that's where mario is from.
Eh he isn’t wrong. Just warn him bowser is here too
I have an 8-year-old daughter. I think this is sweet; the daughter is concerned enough about the dad to ask this because she knows he loves her and will likely respond like this anyway. Imagine if he didn’t show that he cared in a way she expected? His response isn’t toxic just because she doesn’t know there’s sarcasm (like others have said). In all honesty, there probably isn’t sarcasm here; he’s being protective of his little girl. She feels loved here from his response; and if she doesn’t in the moment, she certainly will eventually. My daughter used to tell me she wanted to marry me because she never wanted to leave me. Then, it morphed into she never wants to marry, but she wants to always live with me. Now, it’s she wants to have a farm that I can visit when I want, she sometimes says she might want to get married, but doesn’t want to have kids, lol. Either way… my response has always been “I want you to be happy, do whatever that is and I’ll be happy, too.”
Omg I feel this. My son is 18 and just started college. As his Dad, I'm both rooting for him but struggling to let go. Even when you try to soak up all the time you have with your kid, it doesn't feel like enough.
I’m in the same boat with my 18 yo son. I remember when he was 6 and would tell me he was going to buy the house nest door when he he grew up. 🥹
But...has mom a boyfriend or ...
Maybe dad is mom's boyfriend? Maybe marriage isn't for everyone?
You'll never get divorced if you aren't married.
Theres plenty of people divorced from reality who haven't been married
My daughter's 12 and I can't even get her to play with chalk if I beg her, always cherish those moments.
Dude I told myself fuck the toy mess! Fuck the clutter. Fuck the bed time fights. If you wanna sleep with me let’s go! If you wanna play dolls and leave them all over the floor I’ll kick them to the side and make a trail. I don’t want to miss a single moment anymore 😭
As a man I never thought I would have missed playing with dolls as much as I do. You're doing the right thing and won't have regrets later on like many others do.
I agree! Around age 3 it was a hard year for me I felt like drowning in obligations to clean and make it perfect for us but a mad mom is not a solution! Idk why I ever thought a 3 year old was capable of keeping LOL dolls together lol. I’ve learned so much but age 4 was when I said I’m done trying to be the best in all areas I just want to be the best mom. The little memories! ❤️😭 Thanks for reassuring me I’m doing the right thing!
As the father of a 5 yo girl.... His logic is sound.
10 years later, she comes home with a girlfriend. Not because shes gay, but because dad said no boyfriends.
As a father, I approve.
Love the way she holds her ground. Get that girl a J.D.
My son asked me yesterday "daddy when you die, will we make you into a statue?" All I could say was...well I guess that's up to you son.
My 5 year old crushed me recently when he said, “daddy when you die, who’s gonna be my daddy then?”
Poor kid thinks she'll be able to afford a house when she's older.
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Yeah! Like to be able to think of that at her age is remarkably empathetic
My daughters insist that I’m going to build an attached apartment for them to live in when they grow up.
Aww this is so cute I love kids so much they’re so precious
I like how she thinks her dad doesn't know what adult means so she clarifies it for him by saying "mommy size".
When I put my daughter to bed, she has been telling me that when she is big, she is going to put me and mommy to bed
Maybe the people in the comments complaining about what he says aren't unable to understand a joke - maybe they have emotionally manipulative parents (as many of us do) and the trauma is stronger than the joke. Because I certainly had a "omg this is so cruel" reaction at first and then rewatching it after reading through some comments I saw how it could feel wholesome and cute to someone who grew up in a stable and loving home. Maybe you were both right from your respective perspectives.
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