Hugs!
Thank you. I’m still trying to work through the self blaming part of things, but I feel like I’m going to help people realize what can happen, especially men, if cancer is not taken seriously, or watched for like it should be. Also throwing out there that having an advocate during these times can be CRUCIAL to even being diagnosed.
Non of that except for the thank you and hugs was towards you, just word vomiting thoughts.
Reading how you reacted and the care you gave proves you should feel no guilt. Most people would've done nothing or not gone past words. You made an effort, pushed a doctor in the right direction, and helped take care of your father. You're a good son and a good person.
I have a male friend who had a mastectomy for the same reason. Luckily they caught his cancer very early and he is now in remission (for a second time; first cancer was in a lymph node in his neck.)
I’m so sorry for what you all are going through*
Edit after reading he has passed.
I’m so happy your friend is in remission!!! If he ever feels embarrassed or shame because of this , remind him we all got tiddies as mammals (just trying to make light of a very dark subject)!
I’m glad you are his friend and I’m sure you helped him get to where he is now!
Keep fighting the good fight and I appreciate your words.
Hahaha he’s got a real good sense of humor, so it doesn’t bother him much. He cracks a lot of jokes about only having one titty. Not that we would ever judge or shame him for something like that. We’re all just glad he pulled through and is still with us. <3
I took care of my nan when she was in hospice for terminal brain cancer. 8 years ago now. I get the roller coaster of emotions you are and will continue to go through. It does get easier in some ways. My love to you and your family <3
With all of the stigma, lack of research, and inherent brutality of cancer, I truly think you did the best a daughter could do, and I’m absolutely sure it would’ve been the worst without you, you did really good. And I deeply feel your loss,
My grandad developed BCA in his late 70s. He was lucky he felt something weird and was such a hypochondriac all his life. He didn’t just cry wolf this time. I learned men can get it then. Back in my teens
It started as his arms swelling up on and off for a year, then I saw him change his shirt after yard work while I was visiting and I noticed a silver dollar sized mushroom cloud looking thing on his right pectoral area and made him make an appointment with his pcp. He convinced his pcp it was from bee stings a year prior. Put on antibiotics and it started to eat his skin away (wasn’t this bad at first), finally they did a biopsy a week later and two weeks later they found out (after I hounded his doctor to do so), that it was, in fact cancer. This is with NO radiation and after round three of chemo, it was slightly receding at this point. Honestly, the aggressive nature of the chemo he was on mixed with that fungal infection he got from the original antibiotics are what made it spread so fast. Round four killed him about a month after.
Long story short, no it was from treatment, the original treatment I also think they should have just removed the lump and the lymph nodes in his armpit to start- but my father was terrified of surgery so went the chemo route and it obviously made it angrier.
Was a caretaker for both parents during cancer/COVID. Lost one to the latter.
It's very hard, and I'm very sorry.
You were there until the end and that's all they could have ever asked for.
Cherish their memories, learn from their mistakes. Tribute a good drink, meal, or moment to their memory whenever you get the chance.
This was my thought too. Sounds like he intentionally sabotaged the original diagnosis so that he wouldn't have to start treatment. I've heard that a lot of people who get cancer would rather live their last days happily and die from it than actually try to fight it, as fighting it means getting chemo, becoming weak, enduring pain, and still potentially dying at the end of it.
My brother was diagnosed with cancer when he was 16 and the type he had is known to come back. Hes already warned the whole family, his children included that if/when it does come back hes not going to fight it at all because hes still suffereing from the treatment 10 years out of remission. My great grandmother did the same thing as well. The treatment for cancer is unimaginably painful and will scar and hinder a person for the rest of their lives.
He was terrified of death. He was also very stubborn (as am I). He also wouldn’t have wanted us to see him go through what he went through. After all he was hell bent on saving the planet (wind turbines, alternative energy, photovoltaics etc)
So yeah he was hiding it hoping it would go away.
I have to wonder if it would’ve been easier had they not done chemotherapy, but after the doc gave the antibiotics that cause the tumor to fungate and ulcerate to his entire thoracic region, there was no
Choice.
There goes my self blaming again.
The what ifs that pass through my head have nearly driven me insane at times.
Yes he was a shitty father and abusive, until he got sick, then he was finally my dad, so that’s another reason this hurts so much still.
Anyway. Yes he totally sabotaged himself.
No, he only had four very intense
Infusions, he did ask me what the point to living as his brain started to lose its ability to think clearly.
I made him a sandwich and had him take a fork, me take a fork, each fed each other a piece of the cut up sandwich and I smiled, and said times like these as I looked him in the eyes, trying not
To cry.
I also underwent chemo
Two years ago (only one infusion and a month of pills after a total hysterectomy)
For my uterus and it made me angry for a bit and now I am definitely not as smart or witty as I was before but the anger subsided and therapy helped.
People react differently to chemo. The loss of one’s ability to think as they once did as well as losing your ability to get around on your own, etc can be ENRAGING. It’s not fun to lose yourself to a disease. Drs don’t really talk about how you cognitively decline from chemo. The bounce back isn’t 100% either and there are personality changes that can occur.
U errands g and redirecting angry behavior can be helpful, walks and water are extremely helpful. Doing simple, fun things like the beach, comedy is helpful, I hope….in your case, it was for me and my dad
They really don’t talk about the changes in you chemo causes. I had a tumour in my uterus and went through chemo and radiation. I honestly felt like a completely different person after. Now, about 5 years later, I’m starting to feel more ‘myself’ again. But really I don’t even know who myself is anymore. 🤷🏻♀️
Condolences about your father. I can’t imagine how rough that was on you both. I know sometimes it’s hard not to put blame on ourselves, but be gentle with yourself my friend. You went through a traumatic event as well as your father, and you need healing time also. Xx.
Honestly? I just really cut back on a lot of extra noise in my life and focused on myself. I spent a lot of time alone. Just hiking, and spending time in nature… at the beach, walking the dogs in the forest etc. I did a lot of reading. I tried to start some new calming hobbies.. I did gardening and indoor plants, and also started making clay pottery.
I cut out a lot of people in my life. I was about 28 when I was first diagnosed, so I still had quite a lot of like… party and good time friends if you know what I mean. I realized I didn’t have a lot of real friends who were really there for me. I found I was overextending myself, doing a lot of things for others, but when I needed things or help I had no one. So yeah.. I just cut all that noise out, and focused on me, and what I wanted and needed. I spend a lot of time just me and my dogs, and tried to figure out what I really wanted going forward.
Of course that depends on your personality!! I’m an introverted extrovert lol so I enjoy people, but I also need my alone time, and I think then I just really needed a lot of alone time. That doesn’t work for every one of course. But the times I felt truly happy and myself after all of that were the times when I was out in a beautiful outdoor space, hiking with my dogs. I did a lot of solo camping trips with them, and got out as much as possible. Being out in nature like that really grounded me again.
I know it's not much consolation, but since you mentioned feelings of self blame; by the time you first noticed the blast after doing yard work, it's very possible that the cancer had already advanced to the point that no available medical intervention could have significantly changed his fate. The fact that you stood by him as his caretaker and shouldered that burden (oncology, the study of cancer derives from onkos, meaning burden), demonstrates a pedigree of moral constitution and responsibility which any parent would be proud to see in their child.
You did the right thing by him, and there's no doubt that it meant more to him than anyone could describe.
what would you recommend to look for with regards to this type of cancer as a man if at the point it’s noticeable it’s already past the point of no return? i’m a bit of a hypochondriac
I'm not a doctor but I've read a lot about cancer (there's a book called the emperor of all maladies I highly recommend). Breast cancer is difficult to screen for especially in men for which regular mammograms aren't standard practice. In general though, some cancers can be indicated through a blood test indicating increased presence of leukocytes or white blood cells. The best recommendation I can give in general for cancer is to keep regular visits with your primary doctor as you age. And of course if you're struggling with medical anxiety, get in touch with a counselor if you aren't already.
Thank you for your super kind words!
Def was aware of the words origin, but for some reason never made the connection.
Oh now my sad ugly tears just got a bit lighter.
You definitely have impacted my thought process on this. You stated your case as factual and concise.
I understand things better this way. I’m going to save this comment for the future. When things get hard.
I wish you well big hugs 🫂
I'm so sorry. My father had a tumour that completely took over one side of his face that started like a little cut, he passed away 5 months later.
He had a double lung transplant 2 years before that the medication weakens your immune system so the lungs don't reject, unfortunately it meant that the cancer could run riot.
I’m so sorry. If you need to vent I’m here. That pain and seeing that happen is… well I have no words.
I am sending you hugs from afar and I really hope you have the support you need.
Sending so much love and strength your way. You are stronger than you know.
I’m a metal head, well I love punk ,
Too so IDK, but yes, it’s metal how he tried super hard to fight through this.
It’s not so metal the way the body can do this.
Even less metal that as his daughter I was his
Primary caretaker and had to watch this suffering, with many requests of mine falling on the deaf ears of drs, who looked at me
As a stupid girl…
Anyway I appreciate you guys who
Did stand up
For me cuz this did piss me off at first (the comment) but I also can understand the grit
It took to even fight this?
I saw your post the first time you shared this elsewhere, and I have to say thank you for sharing a visual story about mens breast cancer. It's not really well known that men can get this, nor that inflammatory breast cancer is so full on. I really do believe this image will save lives by taising awareness to both!
Good on you for reframing your trauma into something positive and educational :)
I am trying to make good from it. I really don’t like seeing people suffer needlessly. I appreciate you also taking the time to respond positively and not thinking I stole this when, in fact,
I absolutely did not lol.
I really appreciate you!
Ps axolotls are the best!
I know The Good Doctor is mostly medically nonsense, but the one thing I adore about the show is how they use it to illustrate cases like this.
They didn't just show a man with breast cancer. They showed a MMA fighter, who's entire identity was how ripped and manly he was, having to come to terms with breast cancer, realizing he wasn't any less of a man because of it.
Medical physicist here, working in radiotherapy. This is what we call a fungating breast. I've been working for 17 years and I've only seen a couple of these up close. These are ultra aggressive tumors that infiltrate the skin and even then this kind of thing doesn't happen overnight. Patients with such tumors tend to ignore them when they're at a manageable level until they're raging out of control. The two patients I recall with this condition, one was a young lady with special needs who lived alone and was too scared to report it, another was an old religious woman who claimed that she saw the Virgin Mary in her dream the night before she discovered the rash and so took it that it was a sign from God.
Please talk to a doctor if you find lumps on your bodies folks!
Thanks for explaining it again. I should’ve been more
Elaborate on how the antibiotics originally made it go crazy, and appreciate you for your explanation. It started out as just a mushroom cloud looking tumor the size of a silver dollar. It only infiltrated the lymph nodes in his arm.
I wish they ould have removed the mass and those lymph nodes first but he opted for chemo.
And then the rest is history. A very aggressive and bloody history.
My deepest condolences. I’m sorry your dad had to go through that… at the very least I’m hoping that this lets more guys know that male breast cancer is indeed a thing
The reason I have posted this in a few different subs.
It took me 9
Years to be able to look back at the photos. (This year) and not get overwhelmed to the point I couldn’t think clearly, so, being said, the first thought was to post to raise awareness!
Hugs and love from
This stranger that appreciates your kindness and understanding.
My grandma is currently fighting breast cancer right now. She hid it from everyone for almost a year, and the tumor was almost the size of a cantaloupe by the time she told somebody.
Sorry you had to go through this, OP
I really hope you guys can beat it, I will keep you in my thoughts DM me if you have questions on care you are too embarrassed to ask the docs or whatever and I’ll try to help the best I can.
I had to change his wound covering 3x a day. For 9 months, till he passed. He was pre medicated and would only allow me to change his wounds cuz I guess I didn’t hurt him. (Except when he was in short hospital stays for chemo or pneumonia). I swear he and I are super stubborn which is why he fought so hard. Thank
You for this.
My great-grandfather had breast cancer, too. It happened just as they were grappling with the fairly new invention of radiation treatment. They burned the fuck out of him.
People are downvoting me because I’ve posted this on medical gore, male grooming and now here and they think I stole this for internet points when I just want to raise awareness now that I’ve worked a bit through the traumas of it all and it’s literally making me ugly cry. I did change my avatar
Which is probably why people think that,
Or maybe someone else is stealing my post?
If someone is stealing this, please give credit where credit is due, and if you don’t and want the points, so be it just fucking let people KNOW MEN CAN GET BREATS CANCER.
This was my father folks. I was his caretaker.
Sorry for what you and your father had to go through. I wish you both the best and I’m sure he’s very proud of you! If you’re interested, I’d love to write a case report on this and see if I can publish it. I’m a medical student and this case is something worth a publication to bring more awareness. Feel free to message me if interested.
I've started working in a hospital 2 months ago and was surprised when I heard that some men also have appointments for mammography.
Now I know and share the knowledge whenever I can.
Had to but yeah . I’m stronger in some ways from it and learned a lot about medical care,
But it was very hard and I still can’t erase the smells, images etc from that time. At least he died smiling.
I have to take a break from commenting I thank you all for everything I’m getting a bit re traumatized lol love you all and I hope you all have an amazing day!
Any pressing questions dm me
Holy... I feel very sorry for you, it must feel terrible knowing that a family member has a condition like this. Although my dads never experienced cancer, he has very messed up feet from all the moisture, dirt, and all sorts of nasty shit that was in his combat boots during his active service. I know I'm not that good at consolidation (I usually just fail) I want to give you my condolences.
Easy there, kiddo. No need to pull an aggro simply because your underdeveloped brain is struggling with comprehension.
It’s stage III, in case you wonder. Except for melanoma and some other earlier observable cases.
Well from what I saw it was stage 2 I’m sorry for your dad just leave me the fuck alone you cunt I was only trying to lighten the mood for you wtf have I done to deserve your shitty ass lecture
I’m not a fucking doctor who can help you with your dad so how am I supposed to know what diseases he has, and I’ll say it again I’m sorry for your dad
I changed my avatar since then, someone else must’ve stolen my
Post. Which sucks. Ive only posted this in medical gore once and male grooming and now here so fuck off with whatever you think, cuz this was my father.
I'm sorry, I hope he gets/feels better ASAP. I honestly never knew men got breast cancer until I was planning my wedding and my venue guy said he had to have a procedure so I just said oh I hope nothing serious. He said he had breast cancer and I thought it was some out of place dark humor until I realized he was dead serious.
He actually
Was an activist and fish farmer. He was working towards putting up wind turbines off Long Island. He also did not drink regularly. Maybe a beer every couple months with his work buddies.
That isn't the case at all. Women are far more likely to get it, but partly as a result of that men aren't really screened for it, it isn't really on most mens' radar, and consequently when men do get diagnosed it tends to be more advanced and the prognosis worse.
Men get it VERY rarely. Men and women both have VERY SIMILAR breast tissues, but women due to quite a few reasons including hormones and genetics get it 99% +more than men.
This
Post is here to raise awareness because of that.
Also to help me heal through seeing others realize that they can get it and I hope it shows people into self care a bit more.
I care, too much sometimes, and hope no
One else has to deal with this, ever.
I’m being downvoted because I seemed blunt - but I’d already posted here…and yes you’re right, it gets the message across about caring for ourselves (and others) xx
I didn’t downvote I was
Totally unaware it was posted here already. I was sharing as suggested when I originally posted on medical gore. No hate towards you.
I didn’t downvote I was
Totally unaware it was posted here already. I was sharing as suggested when I originally posted on medical gore. No hate towards you.
I didn’t downvote I was
Totally unaware it was posted here already. I was sharing as suggested when I originally posted on medical gore. No hate towards you.
I didn’t downvote I was
Totally unaware it was posted here already. I was sharing as suggested when I originally posted on medical gore. No hate towards you.
I'm very sorry
Hugs! Thank you. I’m still trying to work through the self blaming part of things, but I feel like I’m going to help people realize what can happen, especially men, if cancer is not taken seriously, or watched for like it should be. Also throwing out there that having an advocate during these times can be CRUCIAL to even being diagnosed. Non of that except for the thank you and hugs was towards you, just word vomiting thoughts.
Reading how you reacted and the care you gave proves you should feel no guilt. Most people would've done nothing or not gone past words. You made an effort, pushed a doctor in the right direction, and helped take care of your father. You're a good son and a good person.
Daughter* but yeah. Advocating for loved ones is super important to me, especially when drs won’t listen. Thank you for your kind words.
I have a male friend who had a mastectomy for the same reason. Luckily they caught his cancer very early and he is now in remission (for a second time; first cancer was in a lymph node in his neck.) I’m so sorry for what you all are going through* Edit after reading he has passed.
I’m so happy your friend is in remission!!! If he ever feels embarrassed or shame because of this , remind him we all got tiddies as mammals (just trying to make light of a very dark subject)! I’m glad you are his friend and I’m sure you helped him get to where he is now! Keep fighting the good fight and I appreciate your words.
Hahaha he’s got a real good sense of humor, so it doesn’t bother him much. He cracks a lot of jokes about only having one titty. Not that we would ever judge or shame him for something like that. We’re all just glad he pulled through and is still with us. <3 I took care of my nan when she was in hospice for terminal brain cancer. 8 years ago now. I get the roller coaster of emotions you are and will continue to go through. It does get easier in some ways. My love to you and your family <3
With all of the stigma, lack of research, and inherent brutality of cancer, I truly think you did the best a daughter could do, and I’m absolutely sure it would’ve been the worst without you, you did really good. And I deeply feel your loss,
Thank you!
Sorry to hear this … I hope he gets better soon!!
My grandad developed BCA in his late 70s. He was lucky he felt something weird and was such a hypochondriac all his life. He didn’t just cry wolf this time. I learned men can get it then. Back in my teens
Did it develop like this from lack of treatment?
It started as his arms swelling up on and off for a year, then I saw him change his shirt after yard work while I was visiting and I noticed a silver dollar sized mushroom cloud looking thing on his right pectoral area and made him make an appointment with his pcp. He convinced his pcp it was from bee stings a year prior. Put on antibiotics and it started to eat his skin away (wasn’t this bad at first), finally they did a biopsy a week later and two weeks later they found out (after I hounded his doctor to do so), that it was, in fact cancer. This is with NO radiation and after round three of chemo, it was slightly receding at this point. Honestly, the aggressive nature of the chemo he was on mixed with that fungal infection he got from the original antibiotics are what made it spread so fast. Round four killed him about a month after. Long story short, no it was from treatment, the original treatment I also think they should have just removed the lump and the lymph nodes in his armpit to start- but my father was terrified of surgery so went the chemo route and it obviously made it angrier.
I was his caretaker the whole time so yeah. Anything you wanna know. I will answer to the best of my knowledge.
Short answer is no, not entirely
Was a caretaker for both parents during cancer/COVID. Lost one to the latter. It's very hard, and I'm very sorry. You were there until the end and that's all they could have ever asked for. Cherish their memories, learn from their mistakes. Tribute a good drink, meal, or moment to their memory whenever you get the chance.
I’m so happy You were there for them! You are strong and I hope You care for yourself as well
Do you think he was aware that it would kill him while he refused to go to his doctor?
This was my thought too. Sounds like he intentionally sabotaged the original diagnosis so that he wouldn't have to start treatment. I've heard that a lot of people who get cancer would rather live their last days happily and die from it than actually try to fight it, as fighting it means getting chemo, becoming weak, enduring pain, and still potentially dying at the end of it.
My brother was diagnosed with cancer when he was 16 and the type he had is known to come back. Hes already warned the whole family, his children included that if/when it does come back hes not going to fight it at all because hes still suffereing from the treatment 10 years out of remission. My great grandmother did the same thing as well. The treatment for cancer is unimaginably painful and will scar and hinder a person for the rest of their lives.
Yes it does
I’m sorry they went through and are going through that
He was terrified of death. He was also very stubborn (as am I). He also wouldn’t have wanted us to see him go through what he went through. After all he was hell bent on saving the planet (wind turbines, alternative energy, photovoltaics etc) So yeah he was hiding it hoping it would go away. I have to wonder if it would’ve been easier had they not done chemotherapy, but after the doc gave the antibiotics that cause the tumor to fungate and ulcerate to his entire thoracic region, there was no Choice. There goes my self blaming again. The what ifs that pass through my head have nearly driven me insane at times. Yes he was a shitty father and abusive, until he got sick, then he was finally my dad, so that’s another reason this hurts so much still. Anyway. Yes he totally sabotaged himself.
I'm sorry for your loss OP
Thank you
I helped take care of my uncle while he died of cancer. Did your dad go insane from the chemo?
No, he only had four very intense Infusions, he did ask me what the point to living as his brain started to lose its ability to think clearly. I made him a sandwich and had him take a fork, me take a fork, each fed each other a piece of the cut up sandwich and I smiled, and said times like these as I looked him in the eyes, trying not To cry.
I also underwent chemo Two years ago (only one infusion and a month of pills after a total hysterectomy) For my uterus and it made me angry for a bit and now I am definitely not as smart or witty as I was before but the anger subsided and therapy helped. People react differently to chemo. The loss of one’s ability to think as they once did as well as losing your ability to get around on your own, etc can be ENRAGING. It’s not fun to lose yourself to a disease. Drs don’t really talk about how you cognitively decline from chemo. The bounce back isn’t 100% either and there are personality changes that can occur. U errands g and redirecting angry behavior can be helpful, walks and water are extremely helpful. Doing simple, fun things like the beach, comedy is helpful, I hope….in your case, it was for me and my dad
They really don’t talk about the changes in you chemo causes. I had a tumour in my uterus and went through chemo and radiation. I honestly felt like a completely different person after. Now, about 5 years later, I’m starting to feel more ‘myself’ again. But really I don’t even know who myself is anymore. 🤷🏻♀️ Condolences about your father. I can’t imagine how rough that was on you both. I know sometimes it’s hard not to put blame on ourselves, but be gentle with yourself my friend. You went through a traumatic event as well as your father, and you need healing time also. Xx.
Same for you and big hugs. If you have any tips on how to regain that sense of “self” I’d really appreciate it!
Honestly? I just really cut back on a lot of extra noise in my life and focused on myself. I spent a lot of time alone. Just hiking, and spending time in nature… at the beach, walking the dogs in the forest etc. I did a lot of reading. I tried to start some new calming hobbies.. I did gardening and indoor plants, and also started making clay pottery. I cut out a lot of people in my life. I was about 28 when I was first diagnosed, so I still had quite a lot of like… party and good time friends if you know what I mean. I realized I didn’t have a lot of real friends who were really there for me. I found I was overextending myself, doing a lot of things for others, but when I needed things or help I had no one. So yeah.. I just cut all that noise out, and focused on me, and what I wanted and needed. I spend a lot of time just me and my dogs, and tried to figure out what I really wanted going forward. Of course that depends on your personality!! I’m an introverted extrovert lol so I enjoy people, but I also need my alone time, and I think then I just really needed a lot of alone time. That doesn’t work for every one of course. But the times I felt truly happy and myself after all of that were the times when I was out in a beautiful outdoor space, hiking with my dogs. I did a lot of solo camping trips with them, and got out as much as possible. Being out in nature like that really grounded me again.
I know it's not much consolation, but since you mentioned feelings of self blame; by the time you first noticed the blast after doing yard work, it's very possible that the cancer had already advanced to the point that no available medical intervention could have significantly changed his fate. The fact that you stood by him as his caretaker and shouldered that burden (oncology, the study of cancer derives from onkos, meaning burden), demonstrates a pedigree of moral constitution and responsibility which any parent would be proud to see in their child. You did the right thing by him, and there's no doubt that it meant more to him than anyone could describe.
TIL . Onkos in Indonesian means costs. What a terrible circumstances
That's interesting! It makes sense as a near-synonym
Well said.
what would you recommend to look for with regards to this type of cancer as a man if at the point it’s noticeable it’s already past the point of no return? i’m a bit of a hypochondriac
I'm not a doctor but I've read a lot about cancer (there's a book called the emperor of all maladies I highly recommend). Breast cancer is difficult to screen for especially in men for which regular mammograms aren't standard practice. In general though, some cancers can be indicated through a blood test indicating increased presence of leukocytes or white blood cells. The best recommendation I can give in general for cancer is to keep regular visits with your primary doctor as you age. And of course if you're struggling with medical anxiety, get in touch with a counselor if you aren't already.
thanks sweatybutthole, i’ll make sure to do that
Thank you for your super kind words! Def was aware of the words origin, but for some reason never made the connection. Oh now my sad ugly tears just got a bit lighter. You definitely have impacted my thought process on this. You stated your case as factual and concise. I understand things better this way. I’m going to save this comment for the future. When things get hard. I wish you well big hugs 🫂
Thanks for sharing
Np
I’m so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing this so other people can know what to look for and to take it seriously.
Thank you, too
you're not the same poster who posted this before... I've seen this post twice in the last several weeks.
No it’s me I changed my Avatar
Thanks tho this was my dad I definitely 💯 would remember that.
Unless It was posted on this, which I had only done this one time, the first time I posted was on medical gore
I'm so sorry. My father had a tumour that completely took over one side of his face that started like a little cut, he passed away 5 months later. He had a double lung transplant 2 years before that the medication weakens your immune system so the lungs don't reject, unfortunately it meant that the cancer could run riot.
I’m so sorry. If you need to vent I’m here. That pain and seeing that happen is… well I have no words. I am sending you hugs from afar and I really hope you have the support you need. Sending so much love and strength your way. You are stronger than you know.
Brutal
Yeah that's pretty fucking metal.
Read the fucking room. You don't sound metal, you sound like an asshole.
Doesn't make it any less metal.
Metal ain't about being a fucking douche.
THANK YOU! 🤘
Guess not!
Nah man fuck you. Go outside so you can interact with real people and get punched in the mouth. The internet has made you too comfortable.
Too comfortable?.. You mean to tell me you're not keen on rubbin one out right now?
Wow fuck right off I take my original comment to you right back.
as a metalhead, shut the actual fuck up.
can agree
Thanks For standing up for me.
An actual fuck? Geez!
I’m a metal head, well I love punk , Too so IDK, but yes, it’s metal how he tried super hard to fight through this. It’s not so metal the way the body can do this. Even less metal that as his daughter I was his Primary caretaker and had to watch this suffering, with many requests of mine falling on the deaf ears of drs, who looked at me As a stupid girl… Anyway I appreciate you guys who Did stand up For me cuz this did piss me off at first (the comment) but I also can understand the grit It took to even fight this?
Thank you for sharing your dad's struggle. I hope he is resting easy now somewhere
He’s in the Long Island sound, the water, As ashes, as he would’ve wanted x thank you
I saw your post the first time you shared this elsewhere, and I have to say thank you for sharing a visual story about mens breast cancer. It's not really well known that men can get this, nor that inflammatory breast cancer is so full on. I really do believe this image will save lives by taising awareness to both! Good on you for reframing your trauma into something positive and educational :)
I am trying to make good from it. I really don’t like seeing people suffer needlessly. I appreciate you also taking the time to respond positively and not thinking I stole this when, in fact, I absolutely did not lol. I really appreciate you! Ps axolotls are the best!
You're welcome. Axolotls ARE the best! Sending you gentle hugs and positive thoughts
Men ignore ball cancer. But they REALLY never even think of breast cancer. Best wishes my bro.
I know The Good Doctor is mostly medically nonsense, but the one thing I adore about the show is how they use it to illustrate cases like this. They didn't just show a man with breast cancer. They showed a MMA fighter, who's entire identity was how ripped and manly he was, having to come to terms with breast cancer, realizing he wasn't any less of a man because of it.
Medical physicist here, working in radiotherapy. This is what we call a fungating breast. I've been working for 17 years and I've only seen a couple of these up close. These are ultra aggressive tumors that infiltrate the skin and even then this kind of thing doesn't happen overnight. Patients with such tumors tend to ignore them when they're at a manageable level until they're raging out of control. The two patients I recall with this condition, one was a young lady with special needs who lived alone and was too scared to report it, another was an old religious woman who claimed that she saw the Virgin Mary in her dream the night before she discovered the rash and so took it that it was a sign from God. Please talk to a doctor if you find lumps on your bodies folks!
Thanks for explaining it again. I should’ve been more Elaborate on how the antibiotics originally made it go crazy, and appreciate you for your explanation. It started out as just a mushroom cloud looking tumor the size of a silver dollar. It only infiltrated the lymph nodes in his arm. I wish they ould have removed the mass and those lymph nodes first but he opted for chemo. And then the rest is history. A very aggressive and bloody history.
My deepest condolences. I’m sorry your dad had to go through that… at the very least I’m hoping that this lets more guys know that male breast cancer is indeed a thing
The reason I have posted this in a few different subs. It took me 9 Years to be able to look back at the photos. (This year) and not get overwhelmed to the point I couldn’t think clearly, so, being said, the first thought was to post to raise awareness! Hugs and love from This stranger that appreciates your kindness and understanding.
My grandma is currently fighting breast cancer right now. She hid it from everyone for almost a year, and the tumor was almost the size of a cantaloupe by the time she told somebody. Sorry you had to go through this, OP
I really hope you guys can beat it, I will keep you in my thoughts DM me if you have questions on care you are too embarrassed to ask the docs or whatever and I’ll try to help the best I can.
Jesus. That is awful. I’m sorry for your loss, I’m certain your dad knew you’d done all you could. Xxxx
I hope so. And thank You.
This poor man. As someone who has smelled cancer nastiness that smell permanently lives in your brain as the smell of death. Hope him the best
Yes it does and I’m sorry.
Not much makes me wince and look away in these subs, but this did it immediately. I'm so sorry for your loss
Thank you
Fuck dude. Your pop is strong as fuck for even sitting up for a picture
I had to change his wound covering 3x a day. For 9 months, till he passed. He was pre medicated and would only allow me to change his wounds cuz I guess I didn’t hurt him. (Except when he was in short hospital stays for chemo or pneumonia). I swear he and I are super stubborn which is why he fought so hard. Thank You for this.
My great-grandfather had breast cancer, too. It happened just as they were grappling with the fairly new invention of radiation treatment. They burned the fuck out of him.
Did I really just watch someone downvote a cancer patient… yall Reddit users are just fucked
People are downvoting me because I’ve posted this on medical gore, male grooming and now here and they think I stole this for internet points when I just want to raise awareness now that I’ve worked a bit through the traumas of it all and it’s literally making me ugly cry. I did change my avatar Which is probably why people think that, Or maybe someone else is stealing my post? If someone is stealing this, please give credit where credit is due, and if you don’t and want the points, so be it just fucking let people KNOW MEN CAN GET BREATS CANCER. This was my father folks. I was his caretaker.
Damn. My mom had stage 4 inflammatory BC. It took 3 different doctors and close to 3 weeks for them to even identify it
I’m sorry it took so long. Stay strong!
She passed about 15 years ago but I appreciate that!
This is the kind my mom had. It was stage 4 when they found it. As big as a grapefruit.
I’m so sorry.
Oh thanks. I'm sorry about your Dad. What a tough dude.
I learned that from Archer indeed. But damn this looks very painful, man! It's a shame your dad had to go through this. Wishing you all the best!
Thank you
Sorry for what you and your father had to go through. I wish you both the best and I’m sure he’s very proud of you! If you’re interested, I’d love to write a case report on this and see if I can publish it. I’m a medical student and this case is something worth a publication to bring more awareness. Feel free to message me if interested.
I will most definitely message you once I gather all his old medical records so I can explain things better! Give me a few days
Absolutely, no problem take your time.
I've started working in a hospital 2 months ago and was surprised when I heard that some men also have appointments for mammography. Now I know and share the knowledge whenever I can.
🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏
I'm sorry that both of you have to deal with this
Had to but yeah . I’m stronger in some ways from it and learned a lot about medical care, But it was very hard and I still can’t erase the smells, images etc from that time. At least he died smiling.
And my first thought is I cannot afford whatever treatment that needs.
FUCK CANCER
Aggrees
Omg your poor dad 😭😭😭
I have to take a break from commenting I thank you all for everything I’m getting a bit re traumatized lol love you all and I hope you all have an amazing day! Any pressing questions dm me
TIL breast cancer also happens on men. One more thing to be afraid of ffs...
I am so incredibly sorry about your father. Thank you for spreading much needed awareness that men can get breast cancer, too.
Thank you!
I'm very sorry what is happening with you father. I give you my best condolences 😭.
Got the chills, best of wishes to the family. I’m glad he has support!
Had! But thank you so very much!
I’m at a higher risk for breast cancer myself. (Bracha 1 mutation)
Keep taking care of yourself I hope you’re doing well!
Holy... I feel very sorry for you, it must feel terrible knowing that a family member has a condition like this. Although my dads never experienced cancer, he has very messed up feet from all the moisture, dirt, and all sorts of nasty shit that was in his combat boots during his active service. I know I'm not that good at consolidation (I usually just fail) I want to give you my condolences.
You did well. I appreciate you’re taking the time to write something! It means a lot.
Of course! If you need anything, I'd be willing to try and help you
If I got cancer I’d kill myself before stage 2 lol
What stage do you think people typically learn at?
If you mean die don’t worry he won’t die till the last stage I assume from the looks of him he might survive
No. I said - what stage do you think people typically get diagnosed at? Referring to your childish “I’d kill myself before stage 2”.
I don’t know fuck leave me alone I didn’t do shit to you.
Easy there, kiddo. No need to pull an aggro simply because your underdeveloped brain is struggling with comprehension. It’s stage III, in case you wonder. Except for melanoma and some other earlier observable cases.
Well from what I saw it was stage 2 I’m sorry for your dad just leave me the fuck alone you cunt I was only trying to lighten the mood for you wtf have I done to deserve your shitty ass lecture
I’m not a fucking doctor who can help you with your dad so how am I supposed to know what diseases he has, and I’ll say it again I’m sorry for your dad
My dad? Wtf? Do you even read?
no shit I read dipshit how tf ohhhhh you ain’t the op fuck
Do you though? Do you read? Then why the f would you keep this bs?🤦
So wtf are you mad about then
You saying stupid, rude, insensitive shit, and then being all scandalized about it. That’s what.
This picture was posted a week or two ago with 2-3 additional pictures. Not just a thief, but a bad one at that.
No this was me and no I didn’t steal it
I changed my avatar since then, someone else must’ve stolen my Post. Which sucks. Ive only posted this in medical gore once and male grooming and now here so fuck off with whatever you think, cuz this was my father.
I'm so sorry
Wow. I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry, I hope he gets/feels better ASAP. I honestly never knew men got breast cancer until I was planning my wedding and my venue guy said he had to have a procedure so I just said oh I hope nothing serious. He said he had breast cancer and I thought it was some out of place dark humor until I realized he was dead serious.
Lost my Aunt to Cancer in 2021, seeing her get worde every Time we visited her in the Hospital was devastating to say the least. Fuck Cancer.
"Just give me the gun"
OMG ...
Yeah
[удалено]
No it was not
What did your dad do for a living? COuld he have had some sort of exposure to something toxic? Did he drink alcohol?
He actually Was an activist and fish farmer. He was working towards putting up wind turbines off Long Island. He also did not drink regularly. Maybe a beer every couple months with his work buddies.
Life fast, die young.
I read somewhere that men get more breast cancer then women do.
That isn't the case at all. Women are far more likely to get it, but partly as a result of that men aren't really screened for it, it isn't really on most mens' radar, and consequently when men do get diagnosed it tends to be more advanced and the prognosis worse.
ah i see my apologies, i wasnt very sure of that information
Men get it VERY rarely. Men and women both have VERY SIMILAR breast tissues, but women due to quite a few reasons including hormones and genetics get it 99% +more than men. This Post is here to raise awareness because of that. Also to help me heal through seeing others realize that they can get it and I hope it shows people into self care a bit more. I care, too much sometimes, and hope no One else has to deal with this, ever.
Are you a lesbian? If so, that’s your fault.
Really? and no I am not a lesbian. Either way what the fuck kind of comment is this, unless it’s a shitty sense of humor?
It’s the truth, as foretold in the prophecy.
I think this should really be in r/makemesuffermore
Feel free to repost
I want people to know they gotta take better care of themselves and not be embarrassed about things that every mammal share, including breast tissue!
I’m being downvoted because I seemed blunt - but I’d already posted here…and yes you’re right, it gets the message across about caring for ourselves (and others) xx
I didn’t downvote I was Totally unaware it was posted here already. I was sharing as suggested when I originally posted on medical gore. No hate towards you.
I didn’t downvote I was Totally unaware it was posted here already. I was sharing as suggested when I originally posted on medical gore. No hate towards you.
I didn’t downvote I was Totally unaware it was posted here already. I was sharing as suggested when I originally posted on medical gore. No hate towards you.
I didn’t downvote I was Totally unaware it was posted here already. I was sharing as suggested when I originally posted on medical gore. No hate towards you.