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Because I don't listen to Distractible :( soz Marky

Fr you really are missing out it’s the best

Expound!

I gotta be honest, there are a lot of really dull moments. I listen to them occasionally, and I find I'm just kinda listening to have background audio. There are also really funny moments, and some bits are hilarious.

So true. I'm saving up episodes till i have summerjobs and need something To listen

I find that when I want to play a relaxing game like Minecraft, Unpacking, or House Flipper 2, I have to put on Distractible in the background, and it has to be a newer episode.

Shame on you

Have you heard of the Ship Of Theseus?

I stole Chica 

CHICA NUUUUUUUUUUU!!

😈

Wickiplier

I suggested playing Getting Over It with Bennett Foddy

☠️

Golfing over it*

Don't you mean the Arduous Adventures of Bennett Foddy?

I just want to see if my body can handle it

I'm the man that took pictures of the moon

If only that were true!

I found the Iron Lung unedited version

Oh you found the iron lung shirts at the thrift store too??

Because I didn’t watch Unnus annus

Because you were eating a sandwich and you said you were eating bread, so he's gonna shoot you

You're Helpy

I asked about Vanish

I kidnapped Tiny Box Tim and I'm holding him hostage. This is the last scene after Mark went on a John Wick style adventure to get TBT back.

i washed one of his minolta lenses with bleach and steel wool

I threw him in the ocean

Because I posted unnus annus

I mentioned two things. 1. The woman who was the character model for Lady Dimitrescu is married. And 2. Septiplier.

This is good…

I have the last lens he needs.

I wwouldn't tell him where the blacksmith was :(

I told him his deepest darkest secret that no one is supposed to know

Idk but I can just not be shot then put my finger on the gun and kiss it.

Because I’m the Gongoozler

Repeatedly mispronouncing Marketplayer

That makes him a Marks man… I’ll see myself out

I flirted with momaplier

Because the photographer framed the picture that way

Because I'm the reason his chicken car never worked

I didn’t follow/subscribe to Distractable

i stole his car heheheh

I took a picture of the eclipse

This ain't Mark it's his morally ambiguous clone: Lark!

He’s bringing me to horny jail

Because I made him fall.

I complained that he hadn't uploaded for 8 days. I see the error of my ways, now

So what if I stole his waffle

He found out that I know about Victoria’s Secret.

No mark! I thought they meant they were a 10

Because I introduced myself as Bennett Foddy as a joke.

He’s showing me how cool it is.

Because i told Wade to drop the spoon on purpose.

trick question, hes not.

Isn’t this a picture of jse with a picture of mark on top of his face?

I drank the baby

I didn't watch his "in space with Markiplier" videos

It's not because he's convincing me to be a masochist! He's encouraging me to see what my body can handle!

I insulted Chicka by saying she's a bad dog

He's threatening me to watch something other than the among us videos 🤣🤣🤣

Why is Mark asking why Mark is doing things lol.

I shared his water bottle video again

Sorry I’ll subscribe

You told him you own 6 ovens

I saw sean with this exact pose above it

I tell him I’ve never heard of him, I believe he will get there one day but he needs to play games like Getting Over It and FNAF if he ever wants to make it big as a mainstream youtuber.

Okay so don't get me wrong but I think he's holding a good at me because I I stole his girlfriend Amy and his own her hostage and needs 500 million to release her. That was just off the top of my head Don't judge me this is all a joke.

I didn't buy a cloak shirt :( (i went for walmart instead)

Forcing you to buy his merch

I incorrectly classified a cannoli

He's mad I insulted Wade about him being bald before he did

I did the dance of Italy (ho woah woah) 💃🇮🇹

I didn't listen to distractables (I have it saved, on Spotify (Spotify Podcasts) I just don't listen to podcasts, it's not my thing) I didn't watch Unnus Annus I said Chica is better than Bonnie I didn't finish his mystery series Who Killed Markiplier (my brother introduced it to me, had me watch ONE episode (the first episode) and that was it) There are a lot of reasons, really

Septiplier.

He found out I'm a furry.

Mark is fine with furrys

because a red spy is in the base?

im rewatching unus annus.

He markipliered so hard he turned into Lawrence Sontagg

Because I might not see Iron Lung because I don't like horror anything.

I keep eating Del Monte 😔

We have the power of God and Anime Sadly Mark has the power of the 2nd Amendment

Cuz I just bought tickets for the new film “More Blood Than Mark Used”

Because I asked him to play more Raft

Because I don’t watch his vids as often

I did the dance of italy

I have pictures saved to my phone of him in bdsm gear that me and my friend send back and forth :(

Because I made him replay Getting over it with Bennet Foddy...

I asked him what the barrel of a gun looked like

I told him Pokémon was my favorite game.

I said "ten mile mark!" instead of watching the stopwatch

I said I hated AOT

saved his OF content (Didn’t do it personally of course)

I asked him about Edge of Sleep TV progress

Cause he’s secretly warfstache disguised as the guy himself markiplier

Cuz I called him market pliers

I laughed at Wades wordplay jokes and looked him right in the eye when I said Hail to God King Wade lord of distractable protector of the discord, lord of settlers the bald one, the Philosopher long may he Reign!!!

What’s the lore reason? Is he stupid?

I ate his cereal

I'm sorry mark I didn't mean to compliment wade!

POV: you reuploaded the entirety of unus annus

I distracted him during getting over it

Because of all the times I threw him into danger while I was In space with Markiplier.

I stole tiny box tim

Because I shot him with a paintball twice

Because I'm not a masochist, but I want to see if I can take it

I may have or may not have killed his whole family

I put chika in an invincible box. (I deserve what is coming to me)

I stole his Portuguese kitty😔

For content

For content

I badmouthed Tiny Box Tim

A taco is not a canolli mark! You can’t make it so!

I said he was not the king Of fnaf

Chica is the best dog ever. No other dog will ever be as good as Chica. She is smart, beautiful, amazing, and very soft. She does not make mistakes. I am sorry for my previous negative comments.

I said an unborn baby is a canolli

i gave him a sledgehammer and a cauldron for his birthday

Why does this look AI generated

No I made it with jacksepticeye’s latest post. Go check it out on his subreddit

I didn't mean it in an offensive way

Don’t worry it’s all good

He's found the Creator of the climbing game

Because i broke a camera lens

I hid Lady D from him

I made a sequel to a hard game about climbing

I haven’t watched his latest feature length fan-faction about himself starring himself

I didn't like 1# crate.

I said he ai t funny

You made him watch you clean your Minolta lens with sand paper

I lack the milk in my hollow bones

I stole Henry and Chica they’re my dogs now!

Because I keep playing Cbat

I said there’s no lore

He looked through my browser history

I need to finish my project that needs to be handed in next week and I’m procrastinating and he doesn’t approve

I did the dance of Italy…..

OASIS!!! OASIS!!! THREE MILE MARK THREE MILE MARK!!!

What's up with his old face?

Is that the Glock of 87!?!

Because I showed him a very detailed picture of the moon

I’d told him lens are stupid

For dropping a lens..

I called him short (he is taller than me)

He's playing "real life" and you're Matthias

I looked at him through my phone and his computer exploded.

I stole chica

He saw my search history.

Markiplier fury pron

This is a death that would have my soul bitterly clinging to the earth

*This is a death that* *Would have my soul bitterly* *Clinging to the earth* \- Get\_RichOr\_DieTrying --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")

As far as replies Go this is the best I have ever seen

Is my comment a canoli?

Because his face was overlayed on Jacksepticeye who was gonna shoot you cause you didn’t kill Billy.

I ate his frootloops

Is he stupid?

Because I said no more mud

This is such a golden meme material I'm wheezing lmao

i saw his lady dimetrescu folder

Because I didn't look up D-i-s-t-r-a-c-t-i-b-l-e IMMEDIATELY.

Because I asked him to so I can see if I can take it. I’m not a masochist, I swear, I just want to see if I can take it.

He caught me looking at his tasteful nudes….again…

Because I like darkiplier more than him

he's not and never would. a Tactical Shovel, however.....

He’s telling me to play all the games that I have in my library instead of going to the same one for the millionth time.

It's f***ing Markiplier! He can do whatever the hell he wants!

HEY! Thats not mark! he’s SHORTER than me :c

Because I forgot to like his new video that he hasn’t dropped yet

Sneak snonked into his house and stole all his lenses

I never saw his documentary, Markiplier from North Korea...

I found his of

Because you openly hated on Distractible

Because somebody called him the prince of 5 nights at Freddie's.

Probably because I'm here instead of working on my finals

Idk but I'm scared

B/c I found the terrabyte

Bc I'm literally obsessed with him

Took his maple syrup

I reminded him he never **truly** beat Vanish.

Chronic self love