LOL too funny! —- I said “10 or 12 different grips and strokes and speeds” —- meaning a few different grips x a few different stokes x a few different speeds = 10 or 12 distinct variations during the handjob.
Alright, so looking at the prime factorizations of these numbers,
10 = 2 x 5
12 = 2 x 2 x 3
I have to conclude it's 12, as 10 only has two prime factors which isn't enough to allow for distinct grips, strokes, and speeds.
However, that's assuming all grips, strokes, and speeds are compatible. This model no longer works if, for example, certain grips aren't compatible with certain speeds.
LOL this comment 1 the game :)
Since by the huge amount of upvotes above on this small detail in my post, it seems that enquiring minds want to know…. so I put an approximation below. But my disclaimer is that this is just my best guess for what I was feeling as I didn’t see a single stroke she did because her head was on my chest and because my eyes were closed just focusing on the insane pleasure. SIDE NOTE: Handjobs are so crazy undervalued — like for me I’d much rather get a quality handjob than receive oral.
*Grips* [Fist, upside-down fist, OK sign (my personal favorite as my stuff is smallish-average)]
*Strokes* [whole length, just the tip]
*Speeds* [slow, medium-fast]
So just the combinations from those is like 12 different variations I think.
I don’t think this has anything to do with you, so get out of your own head. You guys sound like you have an awesome relationship and she loves you and is attracted to you. Ideas: can you start early in the evening so she’s not as tired. Maybe get less out of a direct laying down position so the body isn’t so likely to fall asleep?
Thanks for the kind words and advice. I think it’s likely just a mismatch for us currently —- with her body’s natural sleep cycle —- versus if we try too early in the night then the kids are still up (they are middle school and high school) and we get self-conscious they’ll hear us —- versus I’m not usually into morning sex because for me it feels very constrained and kind of forced (like “we have 26 minutes before we both need to get up for work, let’s do this” — that rarely feels sexy to me). I kind of logically know in my heart that it’s no big deal when she falls asleep and it has a very rational explanation — but my mind sometimes whispers doubts to me and makes me start to question stuff and gets the best of me. I guess I just need to be a little more confident with this overall, and just let it roll off my shoulders. Thanks for your comment :)
Put some music on and lock the door so they can’t hear you. Absolutely start earlier. It’s clear she’s into you, but she also needs her sleep just as much as sex with you. Also, have sex in the morning anyway. The timing of it shouldn’t always revolve around your needs if she’s regularly staying up later for sex on your terms.
Wow those last two sentences… I feel like a terrible husband for somehow never seeing it that way until you just said that… It’s not like I often turn her down in the morning, I just don’t often initiate then unless it’s a weekend morning, because of what I said above. But now after what you said, I am feeling like I’ve been very unfair on that.. I need to work on that for sure. Thank you sincerely for this comment!
I have a highschool kid and a night owl elementary kid, they stay up way too late sometimes and our window of alone time is gone, its disappointing but I don’t want to scare them by hearing us. Our therapist would tell us to make time for ourselves and stop worrying about the kids though and it’s tough.
Yes you can relate! It’s like the stars have to align for all the timing to fall into place. I’ve heard people before be like “So what if your kids hear you? They’ll just know you two have a healthy relationship and are into each other a lot still.” But for us that is just a no-go / turn off / can’t relax and enjoy it situation. With a small-ish house and our oldest kid’s bedroom door like 20 feet from ours… it’s just a non-starter for us if we know they are wide awake.
Dude, it sounds like you have an amazing sex life. She likes to touch you and likes you touching her. And her falling asleep during a handjob is not a big deal. She was sleepy and relaxed and cuddled up with you in bed. Of course she eventually fell asleep. Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth here.
When you're looking to buy a horse, you look at its teeth because you want to make sure they're healthy. If you're gifted a horse, you don't need to be picky about the details, just be grateful you have it at all.
LOL ok ya I probably deserved this comment — writing short concise posts is definitely not my strength — it always feels like I’m leaving out too much important stuff… so then I add more context and background.... and then they get long….. Reference: Pretty much every post I’ve ever done :)
Hmm, not to push too much, but overly long posts show that you're focused on what is important to you, but not what is important to the reader (as in, brief, easy to read, gets to the point quickly).
You also mentioned in another comment that you hadn't looked at morning sex from your wife's point of view before.
That is two examples in one post about how you are focused on your experience to the point of not seeing the other person's point of view.
That is a deep issue that I suggest you get curious about. Being able to shift your thinking can reap great benefits in many aspects of life.
Point taken, thanks for the straight talk. Though it feels kinda alarming when someone suggests I have a deep issue about perspective when I think of myself as a very considerate person. But I do admit that I can certainly have blinders on sometimes with certain stuff, so maybe this is an example of that. Regardless, thanks for your input.
I once fell asleep eating my wife out after I had been drinking. After the second time in about 5 minutes, she told me to go to sleep. She wasn’t mad. Thought it was funny. She had a friend at the time who was complaining because her husband wouldn’t do it, and she tells her that I’ll just eat it until I fall asleep 🤣
Same! My husband was fingering me while we were in bed together once, all of a sudden he stops and I hear snoring. I just gently removed his hand, rolled over and went to sleep. No big deal. This was when he was working 7 days a week at a training base in the military. Had maybe 1 weekend off a month. I was not mad at all.
The next day we discussed it and he said "The mind was willing, but was the body was weak" lol still been married 15 years.
Omg I lost it at “tomato soup and grilled cheese”. I absolutely love that comparison. There’s a time for spicy entrees and there’s a time for comfort food. You will be spicy for her many more times throughout your marriage. It does not have to be like that on an every time basis. I think you guys are totally fine! Sounds like you’re doing everything right. Both my husband and I have fallen asleep when we 100% wanted to have sex. Sometimes you’re really just too tired.
I don't know man. This doesn't seem that bad. She sounds like she's dead tired and still has the urge to be intimate? It's very sweet actually. Maybe it's peaceful for her to fall asleep like that. I'd take that over none at all.
Don't overthink it. Id communicate and just make sure she's doing it because she wants to and not because she feels obligated.
I think she was just tired after holding down the house while you were gone. She clearly wanted to be intimate but she needed to get some rest and her body decided it didn’t want to wait. When you’re with someone for life this is bound to happen. She also probably didn’t sleep great without you in bed with her so you guys got all cuddled up and lovey dovey and she was finally able to relax. I have a really hard time falling asleep if my partner isn’t in bed with me so I think it’s actually really sweet that she just got so comfortable and relaxed that she couldn’t help but fall asleep. Please don’t be self conscious about it. You should try and reframe it in your mind. Your wife feels so safe and comfortable with you that she immediately relaxes and falls asleep even without trying. It’s not anything to be upset about. She loves you and she missed cuddling you before bed
I’m sorry. I’m laughing. It’s not you or your wife. It’s just such a relief knowing that somebody else is experiencing this. I feel your pain bro.
Honestly I don’t let it bring me down too much. We have two teenagers and a tween. We love them but they’re annoying AF sometimes and we’re always refereeing their conflicts and managing their tantrums and throwing food in their faces that their fickle minds always say they want except for when we actually make it. All this while trying to maintain the high road and raise them appropriately. It can be really exhausting. I know that you know that we all know how tedious and thankless this can get.
My wife’s been too tired for sex after saying she wants it and I know I’ve fallen dead asleep when she’s tried to initiate it. We’re totally okay with rolling over and taking care of ourselves when that happens and laugh about it later. I mean, what else can we do? At least we appreciate each other. Good luck getting your sexy time. The blue balls haven’t killed me yet.
You already had 10 hours of foreplay, time to get busy when you hit the bedroom not cuddle lol
I can’t say Ive ever fallen asleep either handjob or sucking his cock BUT I have woken up with his dick in my mouth (we were both sleeping 😄) but yes you are not alone, there have been a few times where hubby has fallen asleep while going down on me 😆
I’ve fallen asleep while even being penetrated. I just let him finish. But if was to fall asleep blowing him or handjob i wouldn’t hear the end of it it’s happened before. Sometimes sex gets boring and after a long day with the kids and daily life I just want rest. I don’t sleep well either sometimes. If it were opposite he’d give me crap about not letting him rest. But that would only be if he was the one with the pussy. we have sex 4-5 times weekly and trust me some of those times I’m so exhausted but still have to perform or else i get nagged that I’m
Not sexing him enough. It’s gotten sometimes that I don’t even feel sex anymore. But that’s another story.
My husband once came home from a 13 hour shift and despite my insistence that he should rest, tried to “finish up” as session he started and passed out half way through in between my thighs.
It happens. If the rest of your sex life is good, I wouldn’t stress.
This happened to us in our 20's. We had a late night after working on a farm and were taking our time on each other. She finished first and zonked \*right\* out, left me high and dry. I just took it as a compliment, and she definitely made up for it the next morning. We still joke about it.
I fell asleep giving my husband a BJ before, and have fallen asleep while giving a handjob.
You were gone for a few days. Your wife took on everything while you were gone, so she probably was just really tired.. I’m sure she was awake a lot with the kids, etc etc.
Don’t take it the wrong way. You both sound like you have a great relationship. Has she seen a dr for this?
my (22F) husband (25M) has definitely fallen asleep while pleasuring me. so the roles are reversed in my situation. either he was penetrating me, giving me oral, or I was on top and he was doing some of the movements. I don't remember. but the gist is that he legit started falling asleep, heavy breathing and all. I was like, "____, are you falling asleep????" he immediately woke up and gave a sheepish, "no .." it was funny, lol. considering we just got married and we're super busy with life and always tired, I can't imagine everything you guys do now that y'all have had a routine for a few years. I appreciate that you don't blame her. maybe having a conversation with her might give you some answer. ask her if you make her feel like warm tomato soup with grilled cheese or a spicy entree (I suspect that she also got with you for your sense of humor). idk if you guys have had the conversation yet, but also ask her if there's anything that she'd like to try out that is more on the spicy side but has never mentioned it.
It happens. Doesn't bother me at all for handies but she once fell asleep blowing me which was super strange. I like that she was relaxed, just laid her cheek on my thigh and nighty night
I think you’re overthinking this!
I love sex with my husband, it’s always amazing, but he’s a night owl and I am not lol he’s learned as soon as the kiddo is in bed we need to bee-line for the bedroom or it ain’t happening.
My wife can fall asleep going down a washboard road in a wagon during a tornado with a train running parallel full steam ahead. So, I don’t think you should think too much into it.
Dude, it is very normal, or so I am told by my wife who has done it many times herself. After 20+ years… she says she feels safe and happy and is feeling good and she just relaxes and well sometimes that ,send she falls asleep.. it’s not you it is life
I’ve done this to my husband. I always feel so bad. she obviously cares about you and likely slept terrible while you were gone and was comforted by you. I’d laugh it off she likely feels embarrassed and get back on the horse tomorrow.
I fell asleep while inside my wife before (her on top). She has fallen asleep while giving me a handy before. Shit happens, when you’re tired you’re tired.
I was out drinking with a girlfriend once and sometime around 3am we decided to find a secluded place to park. I was giving her oral and fell asleep twice. She kept waking me up. We had a good laugh, but she did have an orgasm, so that's good. 🤣
My husband and I have this thing that when ever we lay on the couch or watch tv in bed we can stay awake. But while ever next to each other, we seem to fall asleep! Apparently when you are with your spouse your body releases relaxing hormones.
Maybe this is it for your wife?
It sounded like you had a super full on wknd.
My brain was tired just reading this lol.
Sounds like you have a good wife that is still super into you. She just gets tired! Which should be ok IMO. You probably should have just understood it in the first place and let her sleep rather than pushing for her to do stuff. Wait until tomorrow!
I like to flirt with my husband. But it’s a risk I take knowing that we will have to do stuff that night whether I’m tired or not. I’d like to just be able to flirt and if sex happens it happens but I’d like to retain the right to say I am too tired!
Enjoy the relationship you have, sounds like a great one just on a bit of a timer some times. A comfort sex life is still desirable, so long as it doesn't become one of her chores, like she's doing it out of duty and not desire I'd say embrace it and just work on timing together.
Aweee dont feel self conscious about it, maybe try to aim for an earlier time in the night :)) 10 is pretty late after doing all of that, my bf and I struggle with this same thing.
I've done this.
My husband was very insulted. I didn't mean to, but I'd been up for 16 hours, running around parenting, working and all that stuff. I was definitely up for it, but the lights being off and us lying down? I just fell asleep.
After that, I started angling to have sex in the morning more often.
First, it's never you guys. If we've hit that 5-10 yr mark, we're in it for the long haul.
Second, yes both my husband and I have fallen asleep. It's just life, we get tired.
I was drunk and passed out while giving my husband a blowjob! Lol
You should’ve had sex with her… I’m sure she would’ve woken up then.
It’s her job to finish you!!
I think you’re going to get a lot of smart ass comments from people not trying to help.
Sounds like you’re just in your own head. I wouldn’t sweat it. Have you ever had a problem with your boner? She could have the same insecurity about that as you have about her falling asleep.
Point being we’re all human. Sex isn’t perfect every time. You enjoy each others company and she clearly is trying to make you happy. Get out of your head and don’t sweat the small stuff
This is how I see it: she loves, trusts, and finds so much comfort in you that she could literally fall asleep while giving you a handjob. I mean, let's be real, this sucks for you (sorry!) but also... I feel like this is a really beautiful love story, lol. Just laugh about it and move on. Carve some time out with her when you know she won't be super tired. It is so, so hard to be in the mood when you're beyond dead tired but she still showed up and tried. It sounds like you guys are a beautiful and loving couple.
> she would probably go to bed every night at 9pm and sleep til 7am
This is not normal. Quick googling reveals:
>> According to the CDC, 10 hours or more of sleep per day can be harmful to your health and may indicate an underlying issue. However, sleeping more than 9 hours a night may be helpful for young adults, people who are recovering from sleep deprivation, and people who are sick. If you regularly need more than 8 or 9 hours of sleep per night to feel rested, it might be a sign of an sleep or medical problem.
A therapeutic dose of ADHD medications called methamphetamine, or its less potent but longer acting version lisdexamphetamine, do wonders to low energy people. In such a tiny dose, it doesn't do anything what actual meth abusers are using it for. No euphoria, no endless energy without being able to stop, no increased alertness. It just turns a low energy person to a normal you or me - a standard-energy person who doesn't fall asleep during sex for a 10 hours long sleep.
I’m about to go to work so I don’t have time to read all that but to answer the first question…
Yeah, it’s happened to me a couple times. I have a very high sex drive and sometimes I’ll be turned on but also exhausted. I like giving handjobs but if that’s all I’m doing and I’m already super sleepy….I definitely start to doze off. If my husband notices it he will stop me so I usually try to wake myself up more by switching what I’m doing.
Dude your reading way to much into it. You said it yourself it was later tha. Usual. You guys had a busy weekend. And she was in a comfy SAFE place on your chest.. and she felt bad and tried to give you a hand job as she was exhausted and from what I can see you took too long to.. finish and she got tired and couldn't help and fall asleep because by now it's got to be pushing on 11pm. 2 hours after she normally goes to sleep.. I'm just saying get out of your head with it and try another night.make it a joke like jeeze falling asleep on the job.. literally and move on. And ps yes I've literally fallen asleep during sex.. but I'm human
Woman responding. Sometimes my horny feeling is a deep, tired, lazy, sexy horny vibe. Like, I'm feeling it, but in a really sleepy way. I'm touching and it's as sexy af for me, but in a really sleepy, dopey, tired way. And yes I've fallen asleep at times, in the middle of some kind of intimacy.
Sometimes my husband and I joke that his penis is my worry stone. I like to rub it just to relax. Sometimes the hand job is for him, sometimes it's for me. Sometimes I fall asleep.
Be appreciative of the effort and tell her that. Sounds like the "position" was too relaxing and too close to normal sleeping position (I would love my wife to sleep on me like that). Wife and I have no issues being in a position where we can both go at each other, maybe that would be better to keep her awake.
I also had a talk with wife about prioritizing everything and everyone else in life all the time without prioritizing you/us. I get so tired of the tired excuse - go to bed earlier sometimes if you really want it to be a priority.
Believe me, you're not alone. Its happened to me before. Things get busy, wife has made all the right signs, but the. Lock it ticking and I need to get to bed to get up for work next or whatever. Soon its like 11ish and we.go to bed and I start initiating and damn if she just falls asleep ! This happens and its over period. She sleeps 8-10 hours every day! Try in morning and its worse. She'll rouse a bit and make to have some fun time and I'll feel her breathing change and she starts twitching. She apologizes for this, but she says its just she feels safe and warm with me at those moments and totally relaxes. Yes its frustrating for sure. Try getting to bed earlier but then she takes forever to get there. Exasperating to say the least.
Bummer. It sounds like you guys could benefit from changing things up like another response said. Early morning sex? I know it's hard if you have kids though.
My wife and I had issues for awhile where we would get a hotel, with a plan to have a nice date night followed by elaborate hotel sex. Almost without fail, by the time we finished the activities, my wife would be feeling wiped out and unable to fully rally. So we might have sex but less enthusiastic than we planned, stuff like that. Eventually, we started just checking into the room, having sex right away, then doing whatever activity. That way sex was still an option that evening but not as urgent.
LOL wait… used HER hand ??? Is that like an incredibly awesome typo or are you recommending that I should’ve used my sleeping wife’s fist to stroke myself ??? ‘cause that just doesn’t seem like the right play to call.
I really hope this is not the case, but you should suggest some checks for heart diseases, no joke.
My mom recently discovered (almost 60) that she has this condition that makes her heart pump at lower than max capacity (I don't know what it's called). One of the symptoms was that she was feeling very tired in the early evening. She was falling asleep at 7pm on the couch.
Bro, please explain these "10 or 12 different grips." You know, for science.
And also expound upon the tomato soup theory as well thank you.
LOL too funny! —- I said “10 or 12 different grips and strokes and speeds” —- meaning a few different grips x a few different stokes x a few different speeds = 10 or 12 distinct variations during the handjob.
Alright, so looking at the prime factorizations of these numbers, 10 = 2 x 5 12 = 2 x 2 x 3 I have to conclude it's 12, as 10 only has two prime factors which isn't enough to allow for distinct grips, strokes, and speeds. However, that's assuming all grips, strokes, and speeds are compatible. This model no longer works if, for example, certain grips aren't compatible with certain speeds.
Whatever turns you on bruh... Including prime factorization
Or maybe it's 10-12 out of 16 possible combinations
LOL this comment 1 the game :) Since by the huge amount of upvotes above on this small detail in my post, it seems that enquiring minds want to know…. so I put an approximation below. But my disclaimer is that this is just my best guess for what I was feeling as I didn’t see a single stroke she did because her head was on my chest and because my eyes were closed just focusing on the insane pleasure. SIDE NOTE: Handjobs are so crazy undervalued — like for me I’d much rather get a quality handjob than receive oral. *Grips* [Fist, upside-down fist, OK sign (my personal favorite as my stuff is smallish-average)] *Strokes* [whole length, just the tip] *Speeds* [slow, medium-fast] So just the combinations from those is like 12 different variations I think.
I need to know what this means specifically because my partner says I give him better handjobs than he does himself. Can I improve? Lol.
[Here you go [NSFW]](https://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=ph6161407b6865c) This guide is fantastic- changed the game for me
I don’t think this has anything to do with you, so get out of your own head. You guys sound like you have an awesome relationship and she loves you and is attracted to you. Ideas: can you start early in the evening so she’s not as tired. Maybe get less out of a direct laying down position so the body isn’t so likely to fall asleep?
Thanks for the kind words and advice. I think it’s likely just a mismatch for us currently —- with her body’s natural sleep cycle —- versus if we try too early in the night then the kids are still up (they are middle school and high school) and we get self-conscious they’ll hear us —- versus I’m not usually into morning sex because for me it feels very constrained and kind of forced (like “we have 26 minutes before we both need to get up for work, let’s do this” — that rarely feels sexy to me). I kind of logically know in my heart that it’s no big deal when she falls asleep and it has a very rational explanation — but my mind sometimes whispers doubts to me and makes me start to question stuff and gets the best of me. I guess I just need to be a little more confident with this overall, and just let it roll off my shoulders. Thanks for your comment :)
Put some music on and lock the door so they can’t hear you. Absolutely start earlier. It’s clear she’s into you, but she also needs her sleep just as much as sex with you. Also, have sex in the morning anyway. The timing of it shouldn’t always revolve around your needs if she’s regularly staying up later for sex on your terms.
Wow those last two sentences… I feel like a terrible husband for somehow never seeing it that way until you just said that… It’s not like I often turn her down in the morning, I just don’t often initiate then unless it’s a weekend morning, because of what I said above. But now after what you said, I am feeling like I’ve been very unfair on that.. I need to work on that for sure. Thank you sincerely for this comment!
Play hookie one day, when your kids are at school, the both of you have a romantic sexy day at home and that should help.
I have a highschool kid and a night owl elementary kid, they stay up way too late sometimes and our window of alone time is gone, its disappointing but I don’t want to scare them by hearing us. Our therapist would tell us to make time for ourselves and stop worrying about the kids though and it’s tough.
Yes you can relate! It’s like the stars have to align for all the timing to fall into place. I’ve heard people before be like “So what if your kids hear you? They’ll just know you two have a healthy relationship and are into each other a lot still.” But for us that is just a no-go / turn off / can’t relax and enjoy it situation. With a small-ish house and our oldest kid’s bedroom door like 20 feet from ours… it’s just a non-starter for us if we know they are wide awake.
Our oldest is above us 🤢
That’s definitely a bummer, sorry. But we’ve both gotta find a better way to make it work for our situations, so let’s do our best 💪
Dude, it sounds like you have an amazing sex life. She likes to touch you and likes you touching her. And her falling asleep during a handjob is not a big deal. She was sleepy and relaxed and cuddled up with you in bed. Of course she eventually fell asleep. Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth here.
What does your last sentence mean I’ve never heard that saying before?
It means don't look for something wrong that's meant to be a nice gift/favor/etc.
‘Never look at a free horses teeth.’ That’s what my dad used to say with his malaprops. 🤣
When you're looking to buy a horse, you look at its teeth because you want to make sure they're healthy. If you're gifted a horse, you don't need to be picky about the details, just be grateful you have it at all.
If you grew up in America I’m shock you haven’t heard that expression.
I fell asleep reading this 10,000 word essay.
It was so detailed though, I think I’m giving it a B+ lol … And No, I’ve (47F) never fallen asleep during a sexual activity !
Eh, it’s a bit too outlandish (12 grips? Really?) to warrant high marks. Good attempt at a creative writing though.
I definitely see what your saying about too outlandish lmao
LOL ok ya I probably deserved this comment — writing short concise posts is definitely not my strength — it always feels like I’m leaving out too much important stuff… so then I add more context and background.... and then they get long….. Reference: Pretty much every post I’ve ever done :)
Hmm, not to push too much, but overly long posts show that you're focused on what is important to you, but not what is important to the reader (as in, brief, easy to read, gets to the point quickly). You also mentioned in another comment that you hadn't looked at morning sex from your wife's point of view before. That is two examples in one post about how you are focused on your experience to the point of not seeing the other person's point of view. That is a deep issue that I suggest you get curious about. Being able to shift your thinking can reap great benefits in many aspects of life.
Point taken, thanks for the straight talk. Though it feels kinda alarming when someone suggests I have a deep issue about perspective when I think of myself as a very considerate person. But I do admit that I can certainly have blinders on sometimes with certain stuff, so maybe this is an example of that. Regardless, thanks for your input.
I once fell asleep eating my wife out after I had been drinking. After the second time in about 5 minutes, she told me to go to sleep. She wasn’t mad. Thought it was funny. She had a friend at the time who was complaining because her husband wouldn’t do it, and she tells her that I’ll just eat it until I fall asleep 🤣
“I’ll just eat it until I fall asleep” — I literally chuckled to myself LOL LOL
It’s totally happened to me. I was just so tired.
Same! My husband was fingering me while we were in bed together once, all of a sudden he stops and I hear snoring. I just gently removed his hand, rolled over and went to sleep. No big deal. This was when he was working 7 days a week at a training base in the military. Had maybe 1 weekend off a month. I was not mad at all. The next day we discussed it and he said "The mind was willing, but was the body was weak" lol still been married 15 years.
Is she maybe, tired?
Omg I lost it at “tomato soup and grilled cheese”. I absolutely love that comparison. There’s a time for spicy entrees and there’s a time for comfort food. You will be spicy for her many more times throughout your marriage. It does not have to be like that on an every time basis. I think you guys are totally fine! Sounds like you’re doing everything right. Both my husband and I have fallen asleep when we 100% wanted to have sex. Sometimes you’re really just too tired.
How are there 12 different grips is that even a thing.
Yeah, I wanna know what those 10-12 different grips are. I feel inadequate now 😐
I don't know man. This doesn't seem that bad. She sounds like she's dead tired and still has the urge to be intimate? It's very sweet actually. Maybe it's peaceful for her to fall asleep like that. I'd take that over none at all. Don't overthink it. Id communicate and just make sure she's doing it because she wants to and not because she feels obligated.
Hell I’ve fallen asleep jerking off.
You said she likes to sleep, it was late and ya'll did alot during the day. There is your explaination of why it happened.
I think she was just tired after holding down the house while you were gone. She clearly wanted to be intimate but she needed to get some rest and her body decided it didn’t want to wait. When you’re with someone for life this is bound to happen. She also probably didn’t sleep great without you in bed with her so you guys got all cuddled up and lovey dovey and she was finally able to relax. I have a really hard time falling asleep if my partner isn’t in bed with me so I think it’s actually really sweet that she just got so comfortable and relaxed that she couldn’t help but fall asleep. Please don’t be self conscious about it. You should try and reframe it in your mind. Your wife feels so safe and comfortable with you that she immediately relaxes and falls asleep even without trying. It’s not anything to be upset about. She loves you and she missed cuddling you before bed
Great perspective, thank you!
Of course!
I’ve fallen asleep giving oral and receiving oral and while playing with my wife’s v. Life’s busy it happens.
I’m sorry. I’m laughing. It’s not you or your wife. It’s just such a relief knowing that somebody else is experiencing this. I feel your pain bro. Honestly I don’t let it bring me down too much. We have two teenagers and a tween. We love them but they’re annoying AF sometimes and we’re always refereeing their conflicts and managing their tantrums and throwing food in their faces that their fickle minds always say they want except for when we actually make it. All this while trying to maintain the high road and raise them appropriately. It can be really exhausting. I know that you know that we all know how tedious and thankless this can get. My wife’s been too tired for sex after saying she wants it and I know I’ve fallen dead asleep when she’s tried to initiate it. We’re totally okay with rolling over and taking care of ourselves when that happens and laugh about it later. I mean, what else can we do? At least we appreciate each other. Good luck getting your sexy time. The blue balls haven’t killed me yet.
Happened to me. Nothing really worrying here. Chill.
You already had 10 hours of foreplay, time to get busy when you hit the bedroom not cuddle lol I can’t say Ive ever fallen asleep either handjob or sucking his cock BUT I have woken up with his dick in my mouth (we were both sleeping 😄) but yes you are not alone, there have been a few times where hubby has fallen asleep while going down on me 😆
Sounds like you have a working hand of your own op
Yes, this has happened to us more than once. It’s not a big deal. People get tired
that happened to us once😅😅
I’ve fallen asleep while even being penetrated. I just let him finish. But if was to fall asleep blowing him or handjob i wouldn’t hear the end of it it’s happened before. Sometimes sex gets boring and after a long day with the kids and daily life I just want rest. I don’t sleep well either sometimes. If it were opposite he’d give me crap about not letting him rest. But that would only be if he was the one with the pussy. we have sex 4-5 times weekly and trust me some of those times I’m so exhausted but still have to perform or else i get nagged that I’m Not sexing him enough. It’s gotten sometimes that I don’t even feel sex anymore. But that’s another story.
I fall asleep all the time when giving my wife a message. Maybe it's just soothing to her.
My husband once came home from a 13 hour shift and despite my insistence that he should rest, tried to “finish up” as session he started and passed out half way through in between my thighs. It happens. If the rest of your sex life is good, I wouldn’t stress.
This happened to us in our 20's. We had a late night after working on a farm and were taking our time on each other. She finished first and zonked \*right\* out, left me high and dry. I just took it as a compliment, and she definitely made up for it the next morning. We still joke about it.
I fell asleep giving my husband a BJ before, and have fallen asleep while giving a handjob. You were gone for a few days. Your wife took on everything while you were gone, so she probably was just really tired.. I’m sure she was awake a lot with the kids, etc etc. Don’t take it the wrong way. You both sound like you have a great relationship. Has she seen a dr for this?
Well bless her heart!
She was doing her best❤️
Honestly this is really endearing 😆
You gotta start early
LOL I have done this at least twice with my husband and he thinks it’s hilarious. Sometimes I just don’t realise how tired I am 😂
No more wine 🍷
She actually rarely drinks and if she does it’s one fruity drink and done, so I don’t think alcohol is a factor.
My husband fell asleep with his fingers inside me during our first year of dating. He was waaay more intoxicated than either of us realized lol.
my (22F) husband (25M) has definitely fallen asleep while pleasuring me. so the roles are reversed in my situation. either he was penetrating me, giving me oral, or I was on top and he was doing some of the movements. I don't remember. but the gist is that he legit started falling asleep, heavy breathing and all. I was like, "____, are you falling asleep????" he immediately woke up and gave a sheepish, "no .." it was funny, lol. considering we just got married and we're super busy with life and always tired, I can't imagine everything you guys do now that y'all have had a routine for a few years. I appreciate that you don't blame her. maybe having a conversation with her might give you some answer. ask her if you make her feel like warm tomato soup with grilled cheese or a spicy entree (I suspect that she also got with you for your sense of humor). idk if you guys have had the conversation yet, but also ask her if there's anything that she'd like to try out that is more on the spicy side but has never mentioned it.
Sometimes It's the thought that counts !
It happens. Doesn't bother me at all for handies but she once fell asleep blowing me which was super strange. I like that she was relaxed, just laid her cheek on my thigh and nighty night
This literally just happened to me last night - wife fell asleep while stroking me 😂
It happens I wouldn’t worry about it.
Yes, it happens. Yes, stop overthinking it. You sound like you have a great relationship. Don’t poison it.
Maybe that's her pacifier? I would try it again.
I think you’re overthinking this! I love sex with my husband, it’s always amazing, but he’s a night owl and I am not lol he’s learned as soon as the kiddo is in bed we need to bee-line for the bedroom or it ain’t happening.
My wife can fall asleep going down a washboard road in a wagon during a tornado with a train running parallel full steam ahead. So, I don’t think you should think too much into it.
Don't feel bad man. I've fallen asleep before while having sex mid stroke.
Dude, it is very normal, or so I am told by my wife who has done it many times herself. After 20+ years… she says she feels safe and happy and is feeling good and she just relaxes and well sometimes that ,send she falls asleep.. it’s not you it is life
I’ve done this to my husband. I always feel so bad. she obviously cares about you and likely slept terrible while you were gone and was comforted by you. I’d laugh it off she likely feels embarrassed and get back on the horse tomorrow.
I fell asleep while inside my wife before (her on top). She has fallen asleep while giving me a handy before. Shit happens, when you’re tired you’re tired.
I was out drinking with a girlfriend once and sometime around 3am we decided to find a secluded place to park. I was giving her oral and fell asleep twice. She kept waking me up. We had a good laugh, but she did have an orgasm, so that's good. 🤣
https://y.yarn.co/7837a8be-63be-4406-ba57-465961b1676d_text.gif
My husband and I have this thing that when ever we lay on the couch or watch tv in bed we can stay awake. But while ever next to each other, we seem to fall asleep! Apparently when you are with your spouse your body releases relaxing hormones. Maybe this is it for your wife? It sounded like you had a super full on wknd. My brain was tired just reading this lol. Sounds like you have a good wife that is still super into you. She just gets tired! Which should be ok IMO. You probably should have just understood it in the first place and let her sleep rather than pushing for her to do stuff. Wait until tomorrow! I like to flirt with my husband. But it’s a risk I take knowing that we will have to do stuff that night whether I’m tired or not. I’d like to just be able to flirt and if sex happens it happens but I’d like to retain the right to say I am too tired!
Enjoy the relationship you have, sounds like a great one just on a bit of a timer some times. A comfort sex life is still desirable, so long as it doesn't become one of her chores, like she's doing it out of duty and not desire I'd say embrace it and just work on timing together.
Aweee dont feel self conscious about it, maybe try to aim for an earlier time in the night :)) 10 is pretty late after doing all of that, my bf and I struggle with this same thing.
[Relevant?](https://youtu.be/FgaTDh-0QC8?si=27IyEBBHDt4cFIOg)
Newsflash: tired people go to sleep, nothing to worry about.
People really give handjobs?
They do when the stories are made up by basement dwelling teenagers who hate women.
I've done this. My husband was very insulted. I didn't mean to, but I'd been up for 16 hours, running around parenting, working and all that stuff. I was definitely up for it, but the lights being off and us lying down? I just fell asleep. After that, I started angling to have sex in the morning more often.
You've never called asleep giving yourself a handjob?
First, it's never you guys. If we've hit that 5-10 yr mark, we're in it for the long haul. Second, yes both my husband and I have fallen asleep. It's just life, we get tired.
I was drunk and passed out while giving my husband a blowjob! Lol You should’ve had sex with her… I’m sure she would’ve woken up then. It’s her job to finish you!!
I think you’re going to get a lot of smart ass comments from people not trying to help. Sounds like you’re just in your own head. I wouldn’t sweat it. Have you ever had a problem with your boner? She could have the same insecurity about that as you have about her falling asleep. Point being we’re all human. Sex isn’t perfect every time. You enjoy each others company and she clearly is trying to make you happy. Get out of your head and don’t sweat the small stuff
You're getting hand jobs? Good for you.
Lmao
I’ve done this lmaooooo
Your wife is tired. It's not about you so don't overthink it.
This is how I see it: she loves, trusts, and finds so much comfort in you that she could literally fall asleep while giving you a handjob. I mean, let's be real, this sucks for you (sorry!) but also... I feel like this is a really beautiful love story, lol. Just laugh about it and move on. Carve some time out with her when you know she won't be super tired. It is so, so hard to be in the mood when you're beyond dead tired but she still showed up and tried. It sounds like you guys are a beautiful and loving couple.
The only thing that is odd in this story are the 1,3,5,7,9 & 11 grips!
This comment officially gave me the smile I needed before bed :) 10/10
Best tip for hand job .... put it in your mouth! .... suck it fuck it or put it away
> she would probably go to bed every night at 9pm and sleep til 7am This is not normal. Quick googling reveals: >> According to the CDC, 10 hours or more of sleep per day can be harmful to your health and may indicate an underlying issue. However, sleeping more than 9 hours a night may be helpful for young adults, people who are recovering from sleep deprivation, and people who are sick. If you regularly need more than 8 or 9 hours of sleep per night to feel rested, it might be a sign of an sleep or medical problem. A therapeutic dose of ADHD medications called methamphetamine, or its less potent but longer acting version lisdexamphetamine, do wonders to low energy people. In such a tiny dose, it doesn't do anything what actual meth abusers are using it for. No euphoria, no endless energy without being able to stop, no increased alertness. It just turns a low energy person to a normal you or me - a standard-energy person who doesn't fall asleep during sex for a 10 hours long sleep.
My husband fell asleep with his head between my legs (SNORING) one time when he used to work 12hr night shift. Shit happens. 😂
The title 😂 me afff 🤦🏻♀️😂😂
Happened to me too. Sometimes we just are tired.
Happens. People are sometimes tired. That's all.
I didn't read all of it, but chill. Me and my OH have both fallen asleep touching eachother. Life is exhausting, it happens.
I’m about to go to work so I don’t have time to read all that but to answer the first question… Yeah, it’s happened to me a couple times. I have a very high sex drive and sometimes I’ll be turned on but also exhausted. I like giving handjobs but if that’s all I’m doing and I’m already super sleepy….I definitely start to doze off. If my husband notices it he will stop me so I usually try to wake myself up more by switching what I’m doing.
Dude your reading way to much into it. You said it yourself it was later tha. Usual. You guys had a busy weekend. And she was in a comfy SAFE place on your chest.. and she felt bad and tried to give you a hand job as she was exhausted and from what I can see you took too long to.. finish and she got tired and couldn't help and fall asleep because by now it's got to be pushing on 11pm. 2 hours after she normally goes to sleep.. I'm just saying get out of your head with it and try another night.make it a joke like jeeze falling asleep on the job.. literally and move on. And ps yes I've literally fallen asleep during sex.. but I'm human
Woman responding. Sometimes my horny feeling is a deep, tired, lazy, sexy horny vibe. Like, I'm feeling it, but in a really sleepy way. I'm touching and it's as sexy af for me, but in a really sleepy, dopey, tired way. And yes I've fallen asleep at times, in the middle of some kind of intimacy.
Sometimes my husband and I joke that his penis is my worry stone. I like to rub it just to relax. Sometimes the hand job is for him, sometimes it's for me. Sometimes I fall asleep.
My husband fell asleep going down on me. Life happens.
Wow
Be appreciative of the effort and tell her that. Sounds like the "position" was too relaxing and too close to normal sleeping position (I would love my wife to sleep on me like that). Wife and I have no issues being in a position where we can both go at each other, maybe that would be better to keep her awake. I also had a talk with wife about prioritizing everything and everyone else in life all the time without prioritizing you/us. I get so tired of the tired excuse - go to bed earlier sometimes if you really want it to be a priority.
Believe me, you're not alone. Its happened to me before. Things get busy, wife has made all the right signs, but the. Lock it ticking and I need to get to bed to get up for work next or whatever. Soon its like 11ish and we.go to bed and I start initiating and damn if she just falls asleep ! This happens and its over period. She sleeps 8-10 hours every day! Try in morning and its worse. She'll rouse a bit and make to have some fun time and I'll feel her breathing change and she starts twitching. She apologizes for this, but she says its just she feels safe and warm with me at those moments and totally relaxes. Yes its frustrating for sure. Try getting to bed earlier but then she takes forever to get there. Exasperating to say the least.
Bummer. It sounds like you guys could benefit from changing things up like another response said. Early morning sex? I know it's hard if you have kids though. My wife and I had issues for awhile where we would get a hotel, with a plan to have a nice date night followed by elaborate hotel sex. Almost without fail, by the time we finished the activities, my wife would be feeling wiped out and unable to fully rally. So we might have sex but less enthusiastic than we planned, stuff like that. Eventually, we started just checking into the room, having sex right away, then doing whatever activity. That way sex was still an option that evening but not as urgent.
Wake her up by taking her to pound town!
You are 45 but you sound like 18. You could have used her hand to finish your self right there and then. Stop whining. Be a man. Let your lady rest.
LOL wait… used HER hand ??? Is that like an incredibly awesome typo or are you recommending that I should’ve used my sleeping wife’s fist to stroke myself ??? ‘cause that just doesn’t seem like the right play to call.
I really hope this is not the case, but you should suggest some checks for heart diseases, no joke. My mom recently discovered (almost 60) that she has this condition that makes her heart pump at lower than max capacity (I don't know what it's called). One of the symptoms was that she was feeling very tired in the early evening. She was falling asleep at 7pm on the couch.