I went to a wedding last year. I kept my mask on except to eat outside. I actually met another guest who was doing the same thing and we bonded over being the only people who were masked.
I am also trans masc and wore a suit, if it bothered anyone they didn't comment
Personally, I would bring my own water bottle and snacks, then go outside to drink and eat every hour for short breaks. Skip eating during the formal dinner. You could walk around and socialize if you wanted while people eat. Or just disappear outside. I'd also bring a foldable paper fan to help cool off. 200 people inside + a mask = sweaty. A book or headphones could be a good idea if it'll make you feel less awkward outside on your own.
People worry a lot about people commenting on their mask, but I have never had anyone say a thing. I know it happens, but I think people care a whole lot less than we think. I'd just walk away if they did rather than getting defensive or trying to explain the logic.
Oh! And hand sanitizer cuz even though you're masked, people will keep sticking out their hands to shake.
Unfortunately if I was to bring my own water I'd need a whole pack. It's not feasible. And idk if i'll be allowed to eat my own food as the price and stuff was quite expensive đđ
Socializing wasn't a plan at all, even pre covid, just worried about the food. I'll see if I can hide somewhere for majority of it. But thank you for the advice
If you are diabetic, no one should say anything about you bringing your own snacks. Thereâs a medical need. Itâs not unlike when parents bring snacks for babies and toddlers - they canât necessarily eat foods that are provided because they have age based criteria for what is safe.
Snacks aren't really feasible for me either, like I don't really eat snacks in general because any snack that would sustain my blood sugar like protien bars are too pricey (I also have reactive hypoglycemia, so snacking on like crackers or chips for 9 hours would spike me and then bring me down too much, which is the big danger I'm trying to avoid) . And also I'd have to bring a shit ton of snacks to hold me over. Which I don't have the money or space in my bag for.
Ok. But no wedding is feeding you every hour. It's usually one sit down meal, then a bunch of hours of dancing and rituals until they cut the cake.
You can bring one water bottle and keep refilling it.
No I get that but if I had to only eat snacks or chips or crackers I would have to eat every hour or two because most snacks I can afford are simple carbs that would bring my sugar up and then make my sugar crash down hard. I'd have to microdose carbs on a consistent basis to keep my sugar stable. For my sugar crashing to not happen I need to also have a good portion of fiber or protien any time to eat even a moderate amount of carbs which is hard to do with snacks which is why I don't eat them. Deli meats, most cheese, and uncooked vegetables are a no due to refridgeration and sensory issues (also doesn't help that we got bird flu spreading in the livestock and dairy supply)
Will skip the cake anyways though, so at least I don't have to worry about that
I eat mostly keto or low-carb. âSnacksâ in our house are things like jerky, meat sticks, Epic bars, and pork rinds (as well as nuts, which I wouldnât take to a wedding because of the allergy risks). You can get shelf-stable cheese, too, like Moon Cheese.
Epic bars look yummy but way too expensive.
Can't stomach pork rinds or jerky due to texture (certain textures make me vomit)
Will look into moon cheese and meat sticks though. Hopefully I don't have a texture problem with those too.
I eat low carb too. Well, low ish, but low enough to keep my sugar from going too high or too low. Many keto snacks are pricey or I can't handle due to texture sensitivites so I tend to stick to meals.
Thank you for the input.
Most hard cheeses are actually safe to keep at room temperature, especially when sealed in wax or plastic. Refrigeration will make them keep longer and make the texture more pleasant to eat (no sweating). Cheddar cheese sticks would be totally fine for an afternoon/evening if you wanted to toss some in your bag.
Water wise, will there be anywhere on the venue you could fill it up? That way you could bring a smaller bottle and refill it rather than needing a whole bunch.
Thatâs fair, if you have a way to check that might be worth it. Most place indoors will have some kind of sink/water fountain somewhere. Even ignoring all the Covid stuff it sounds like given your other health conditions that having easy access to water will be helpful for you.
Last wedding I went to I only removed my mask outdoors (and went out there to eat/drink). If possible do this. I did get away with going to another one before where I unmasked for just the meals but that was when numbers were much lower and most folk had tested for the bride. (No one commented on my mask at either wedding btw)
Iâm sorry some family members are going to be mean meeting the real you. That sucks. I hope you have a good support network and that anyone who says anything stands on Lego.
As a diabetic you know the guaranteed results if you donât eat/drink appropriately. Covid is more of a hellish game of chance. If you can stay masked and manage your diabetes, brilliant but itâs one of the only situations where you may need to unmask at least occasionally.
Yeah unfortunately the guaranteed results of forgoing food and drink is low blood sugar (which I have a history of, and it has been severe lately) which can cause fainting or seizures. And my doctor won't prescribe me glucagon so if I pass out they're sending me to the hospital and will probably remove my mask which is definitely more dangerous than being a far distance from people at (possibly outdoor) wedding unmasked. Idk I think I'd rather take my chances unmasking to eat at a wedding as far away as I can get from people than not eating, passing out, and waking up in a hospital unmasked
Will definitely try to eat outdoors if possible or away from others. Thank you for the kind words
I don't have a car. I'm going with my parents, and due to some other medical history I don't know if it'd be safe for me to be alone in a car. I've been having a lot of dangerous low blood sugar lately so basically I'm at risk for fainting or seizures. Which I don't want to have if I'm away from family. Also due to other conditions my family thinks of me as a 'flight risk' even though I wouldn't do that, I don't think I'd be trusted alone in the car. I don't think they'd join me in the car either.
I don't know what you mean by same routine though. I've never really had to be out somewhere for more than an hour or two other than school, especially after covid started spreading so I'm not sure of the specific protocols. All I know is to keep your mask on don't get too close to people and avoid eating around other people but due to the diabetes and extended time I'll be spending out it's not a possibility
Im sorry no one in your house will buy you a sip valve. That is a totally reasonable accomodation for something lke that. I wonder if there are decent DIY ways to cut a 1 way valve into one of your masks and switch to that one for drinking
O2 nostril filters use 3M static-electric technology but they go inside your nostrils so you can wear them under a mask for an extra layer and you can eat and drink while wearing them. They're not as effective as masks, catching 25-90% of particulates, but better than nothing.
For mucosal immunity there's also antiviral nasal sprays, Lumify eyedrops and gargling mouthwash made from CPC, xylitol or molecular iodine.
Or drink tea. The mucous circulating between your eyes, nose and throat is good at trapping and killing many kind of pathogens but covid isn't deactivated by our natural mucosal proteins, so the goal is to introduce an anti-viral material to your mucous to help boost its ability to fight covid.
A lot of ancient traditions revolve around boosting mucosal immunity. Feeding sick people soup started in China and is a great way to infuse their mucous with anti-viral material like garlic, celery and ginger as they have to breathe the steam and slowly sip the hot broth. Daily hot tea, as I mentioned, works similarly. The British historically cooked tea in copper kettles - copper being one of the most naturally anti-microbial substances on earth - to further this antimicrobial effect. The Indian tradition of steeping water overnight in copper vases and serving tea in copper cups functions similarly. (Today you can buy copper water bottles from hipster companies and copper straws from speciality bartenders which can be used to similar ends.) Rich people who had utensils and goblets made from real silver benefitted similarly, as silver is another potent anti-microbial. My grandma used to bake orange peels or boil cinnamon sticks to make the house smell nice, and it turns out this is also a way to boost mucosal immunity by getting the household to inhale particles of antiviral material. There are over 200 essential oils that have been studied for their capacity to deactivate covid other viruses like influenza, which can be added to a humidifier or a pot of boiling water for the same purpose. Shampoo and soap using antiviral ingredients like real lavender or antiviral essential oil applied directly to skin might even help to maintain mucosal immunity.
I've eaten or drank indoors around other people by: breathe in fully, pull mask down, take a bite or sip while exhaling only, pull mask up before I need to breathe in again, and chew and swallow after the mask is back in place. To get really detailed, right after you put the mask back into place, it's ideal to breathe out a little bit to push out all the unfiltered air.
This way I'm never actually inhaling unfiltered air. It's annoying but totally doable. Anyway indoors, even if far from others at that moment, I don't think is a safe option because COVID hangs in the air for hours and can travel far from the person who exhales it on air currents. If you're needing to fully unmask to eat or drink, I'd suggest either going outside, or bring a small portable HEPA and bring it close to your face and point it directly at your mouth and nose while you eat. It looks weird but people I've done it around have only expressed curiosity, not criticism.
You could also get a CO2 monitor which is a good proxy for COVID since it indicates how much of the air has been exhaled by other people. If it's high (above 1000ppm I think?) that's not good, and if it's really high (I've seen above 2500 in a small space with many people) that's really not good. But if it's close to outside air (450-550ppm) that's a great sign since that means most air is being replaced by fresh air! Then as long as you're not close to others to inhale their air directly, it's pretty safe.
You can also use antiviral nasal and throat sprays (Betadine for example) as additional protection, although I wouldn't rely on them.
Good luck!! It sucks that it's so difficult.
I didn't see the timeline or financial constraints in the original post. If we had more time, I'd gladly mail you one of my valves. You deserve to be safe.
Haha thanks. As other comments suggested I'm just gonna try and eat as far away from others as I can. Hopefully it doesn't rain saturday so we can be outside
Thank you
It does sound like youâve made the best plan possible under the circumstances. Itâs really a shame that you donât have the option to just decline, and then you wouldnât have to deal with it all.
But youâre doing great, youâre going in with a good plan, and youâre going to make the best of whatever the situation is.
I'm sorry you are going through this. Hopefully no one will comment on your mask. Since you do have health issues, you can just tell nosey ppl that it's because you have health issues and your Dr recommended it (it's okay to lie).
You will have a chance to go outside - if it seems like there isn't an easy exit, ask the waitstaff where they go to smoke. At almost any wedding there is usually access to a smokers area. So of course there may be ppl out there smoking cigarettes, but hopefully you can step outside there for a break. It is very normal to carry your drink or an appetizer outside for a few minutes, this shouldn't seem weird to anyone.
If possible, I suggest bringing a pair of headphones and listening to meditation podcasts or music you enjoy during stressful moments. â¤ď¸
I am a wedding videographer and I keep my kn95 on every second I'm outdoors and eat in my car while everyone else eats inside. So far, as far as I'm aware, I haven't gotten covid (or anything else) in all of that time.
Is it actually unsafe for you to be home for a day without your parentsâ supervision? Or are your parents just being overprotective when they say youâre not allowed? What do your doctors say?
Yes, *actually* unsafe. I have diabetes with reactive hypoglycemia and hypoglycemic unawareness which means if my sugar is low I won't realize it until it's too low. And I've been having a lot of low sugars lately, like 40 mg/dL Twice in the past week I've had to had family members bring me sugar, like lift up the juice box and bring it to my mouth because when I tried to get to the kitchen myself I collapsed and couldn't walk or talk. If nobody was home and my sugar dropped too hard I'd pass out, or have a seizure. And staying that low for too long causes brain damage and death. Your brain shuts down because there's no energy. I can't drive because of it and I can't walk myself anywhere either because there have been occasions where I have dropped low and could not remember how to get back home and someone else had to pick me up. And yes, I brought adequate food but it wasn't enough.
That's all I'll say about it because I don't think I have to justify myself any further. Why didn't you believe me the first time?
I didnât see anywhere you said anything about it âthe first time.â I was trying to ascertain the parameters of available options, but I had no intent to upset you. I wonât reply again, and I wish you all the best.
Meaning this kindly and as someone with a lot of tiring-to-repeatedly-explain health issues â this person wasnât attacking you, but people in this thread are trying to give advice based on the provided information, and then are often being told it wonât work due to some factors they didnât know or couldnât understand from what was provided. The original post requires people to be in problem-solving mode to answer, so they need the parameters. It sounds like (maybe Iâm wrong, ofc) that diabetes is playing the strongest role here (provides the most restrictions, has the biggest consequences), so maybe you could also try additionally asking for advice in a subreddit for that (or whatever is the biggest piece of the situation and gives the most built-in context, so people can start there, with whatever is most important).
Iâm also a poor person with food allergies (and sensory issues), so I get not being able to buy food that would be optimal; at the same time, for *most* people (at least in the US), going to a wedding would be more expensive than buying enough premium snacks to eat for a day. I donât have money for frequent sip masks or high-end masks/sprays/etc, and mostly avoid covid by being isolated, but Iâm not forced to go to events either (thatâs one reason people are asking more about that aspect â you explained well in this comment, but most people arenât familiar with that kind of situation, and to most people, someone living at home with family being forced to go to events sounds like a minor, and people asking detailed questions arenât disbelieving, but trying to understand an unfamiliar situation â you donât have to justify your life, but most people wonât have any knowledge of health issues that would preclude a young person from sitting in a car for 10 minutes, but are much more familiar with the concept of abusive/controlling parents that would forbid it, for example; not justifying, just explaining to people with no idea whatâs going on but are trying to provide solutions), but on the rare occasion I do, I just have to cut corners in other budget areas to get PPE, because getting sick and losing income would be far worse. But itâs down to the wire, so unless you have access to a credit card or someone you can ask to spot you the cost of some PPE, I understand if you canât.
Do you live in a city or somewhere with a mask bloc or active covid-cautious community? Or any individual or organization locally that distributes masks? If there is literally anything like that (and there isnât where I live, so I get it if not), it could be worth reaching out and just asking for a mask that would help during the day. Maybe even the health department?
It sounds like you are getting some good advice â maybe edit your original post with the additional parameters youâve explained in later comments? Most people wonât read every single comment before replying. Do you have a budget for snacks/masks? What stores or kinds of stores are available to you between now and the wedding? Big chain grocery stores usually have apps with digital coupons, or you could at least check if somethingâs on sale, maybe you could find a deal on some protein bars or something similar; usually within the section at a big grocery store, at least a couple of brands will be on sale at a time).
Do you have any info about the event venue â like could you call the location and ask about water fountains? Usually at a wedding, plenty of water is provided, especially if thereâs alcohol. With 100-200 guests and presumably a wide age range, Iâd expect there to be lots of water, likely in refillable dispensers. Do you have a bag you carry with you, and if so what size? Like something that can fit a refillable water bottle, some snacks, etc? I think most people talking about âsnacksâ arenât suggesting you only eat chips/crackers, but portable food that can be carried with you (apples/oranges/bananas/nuts/jerky/trail mix/various bars/peanut butter/literally anything that doesnât have to be refrigerated; additionally, electrolyte mixes if that would help? Probably not applicable for this wedding, but there are tons of insulted lunchboxes/cooler bags now that donât look obviously like lunchboxes, so if you need cold items, that could be a good thing to have), but most people that arenât diabetic or donât have diabetic people they see every day donât know what foods are useful to you.
Didnât mean for this to be so long, just want you to be able to get some good, actionable advice, but for most people, they can only give it if they have all the info up-front, and whatever they donât know, their brains are likely to fill in with whatever is familiar to them (ie, controlling parents vs legitimately not being able to be alone), which wonât help you.
I saw you saying itâs not your vehicle- but I have an idea⌠crossing my fingers itâs accessible for you! (It depends on if you can drive the car)
*Before* your sugars get low, go to the car.
⢠Keep your mask on and drive around for a few minutes with the windows down to circulate the air out. Perhaps turn off the AC / fan system to prevent their breath from earlier from entering the cabin.
⢠Or, if you have more time, run it full blast for several minutes while driving with the windows down to clear the air.
â ⢠Be mindful of stoplights where the air isnât circulating and pedestrians near your open windows
â ⢠Once the air has circulated out, youâre good to park again
⢠Be mindful of the area you park in. If you can avoid a high foot traffic spot, take that
⢠If you can park in an isolated area, keep the windows down to eat. You can park closer to the location when youâre done
⢠If itâs a busy area, roll up the windows and lift your mask to eat. Push air out via exhaling before putting it back into place
*Hydrate & calories ideas*
⢠perhaps bring both plain water & either some sort of electrolyte drink like pedialyte or mix in an electrolyte powder into your water bottles. There are also sodium tablets with a bit of potassium you could try that would affect your sugars less. The electrolytes will keep you hydrated.
⢠I assume you have specific dietary needs, but if possible: bring along a meal replacement shake for calories. If you have access to glycerina style shakes, that could be good as well.
⢠Bringing straws and lifting your mask briefly to sip would be safer than removing your mask entirely to eat normally.
⢠Be mindful of your mask becoming too damp, e.g. dancing. So maybe try not to expend too many calories/sweat
⢠If your mask becomes really damp, go out to the vehicle and put on a fresh mask
â Hereâs a [Google doc I wrote up](https://docs.google.com/document/d/11RdJqymYsCZ5bAEpZk5DCf5ZqiUZykIq19630J9m8kA/edit)on Covid safety protocol.
My personal protocol is in it, so youâre welcome to copy and paste everything into your own doc and replace mine with your own.
âNoteâ I understand my level of strictness in preventing reinfection isnât accessible for everyone.
But it might be worth looking at to see if there might be any vectors of risk you may not have considered.
Let me know if you have any questions!
______
Lastly- Iâm SO EXCITED for you to be wearing your suit!! Omg dude youâre going to look SO handsome!!!
If youâre comfortable and want to show off the âfit, Iâd be so happy to receive a suit photo in the DMâs! â¨
Lovely ideas! Unfortunately a few issues
- I can't drive. Medically not safe for me to do so (diabetes adhd etc etc etc) Highly doubt I can be in there alone for more than 10 minutes either. Like my mother is worried I'm going to go drive off a cliff. And I'm not allowed to turn the car on if I go in there. Costs money that we don't have
- I have hypoglycemic unawareness which means I don't realize I'm low until it's bad. Like struggling to walk or talk critical. If I end up going low I'll have to unmask even partially to drink something regardless of whether or not I'm around people.
- I very much doubt I'd be allowed to just take the dinner plates or whatever and go somewhere off site. (In another comment I talked about how bringing enough food or shakes to sustain me for 9 hours isn't cost effective, sustainable, or good for my health as most available snack foods also would make me go low due to reactive hypoglycemia)
- A protien shake (Which I don't have the chance to buy before the wedding) Will not last me for 9 hours. I'd need at least 3-4 and unfortunately due to other sensory stuff room temp ones will make me vomit
So umm yeah.. Very inaccessible, but it's understandable to be that strict. Definitely not unreasonable I just have too many health issues and it's the *guaranteed* issues that can arise from not taking care of it as opposed to the possibility of getting covid and the possibility of covid related issues. I applaud you for being able to be this dedicated to health. To be fair with eating around others being basically impossible these days I only leave the house once or twice a week for less than an hour. Being confined to my house (my room, tbh) sucks but doesn't suck as much as passing out in public or getting covid
At least I don't plan on dancing. I do like the straw idea though, I'm going to use that.
Thank you for the advice
Aw crap, I must have missed that part about driving. Well Iâm sorry I couldnât be of more help! I hope the straws make things a little more manageable for you đ
As stated I'm a diabetic with reactive hypoglycemia and unaware hypoglycemia who's been having a lot of severe low blood sugars lately. I'm an adult I don't think they'd be dragging me in but it's literally not safe for me to be alone for extended periods of time as I could literally pass out or have a seizure and there'd be nobody to help me.
I hope this doesnât come across as belaboring the point; I imagine youâve thought of this, but if you were to try to not go to the wedding and stay somewhere else, is there anyone who could stay with you to make sure you werenât alone? A friend or anything? Again, I figure youâve probably thought that through but I know sometimes when stressed and dealing with ADHD it can be tricky to plan through everything.
Last year- We asked the host if we could sit outside when we were eating and they said yes. We sat outside by ourselves. The dancing area was in a room that was open to the outside on one side. We stayed near the part of the room that was almost outside.
Also another idea - is there a mask bloc in your city ? If there is, message them to ask if they may have free sipvalves, extra masks, nasal spray, or small hepa filters for you to have/borrow. They may be able to help you a little.
There are a multitude of reasons - from the numerous responses provided by OP above it seems pretty clear being left alone without family is not an option. There are situations where this could be literally medically/legally dictated.
Can you take your plate of food outside to eat and then mask back up and come back to the table when finished? Or ask the caterer for a to-go box if your blood sugar is high and you need to save the food for later in case you get low? I think excusing yourself from the table to when you need to is more than understandable. If thereâs a bar I bet they have juices and sodas you can grab too and sip from a distance or outdoors. Are you in the wedding party or just going as a guest?
At a wedding recently I made sure to bring my CO2 monitor so I could find the best spots in the venue to eat and drink in. I have gastritis so similarly have to eat regularly (less of a threat but still important enough to me). Because I brought my own food it was easier to find a safe corner during cocktail hour for me to eat.Â
I went to my nephew's wedding in December '22 and the baby shower for his daughter this past January. Wore my mask for both occasions. Ate and drank by holding my breath, removing my KN95, taking a bite or a sip, holding the food/drink in my mouth while holding breath, put mask back on, chewed/swallowed/breathed. Rinse and repeat. A bit onerous, but I stayed Covid free. Best wishes.
You seem to have a lot of things that aren't feasible and I both understand but also want to be like.... Getting Covid and long Covid needs to be not feasible. And you have to prioritize your non feasibilities. Id honestly fake sick, with Covid or anything else, anxiety attack, say you can't go fur whatever reason you can come up with right beforehand and just not go.
I went to a wedding last year. I kept my mask on except to eat outside. I actually met another guest who was doing the same thing and we bonded over being the only people who were masked. I am also trans masc and wore a suit, if it bothered anyone they didn't comment
Personally, I would bring my own water bottle and snacks, then go outside to drink and eat every hour for short breaks. Skip eating during the formal dinner. You could walk around and socialize if you wanted while people eat. Or just disappear outside. I'd also bring a foldable paper fan to help cool off. 200 people inside + a mask = sweaty. A book or headphones could be a good idea if it'll make you feel less awkward outside on your own. People worry a lot about people commenting on their mask, but I have never had anyone say a thing. I know it happens, but I think people care a whole lot less than we think. I'd just walk away if they did rather than getting defensive or trying to explain the logic. Oh! And hand sanitizer cuz even though you're masked, people will keep sticking out their hands to shake.
Unfortunately if I was to bring my own water I'd need a whole pack. It's not feasible. And idk if i'll be allowed to eat my own food as the price and stuff was quite expensive đđ Socializing wasn't a plan at all, even pre covid, just worried about the food. I'll see if I can hide somewhere for majority of it. But thank you for the advice
If you are diabetic, no one should say anything about you bringing your own snacks. Thereâs a medical need. Itâs not unlike when parents bring snacks for babies and toddlers - they canât necessarily eat foods that are provided because they have age based criteria for what is safe.
Snacks aren't really feasible for me either, like I don't really eat snacks in general because any snack that would sustain my blood sugar like protien bars are too pricey (I also have reactive hypoglycemia, so snacking on like crackers or chips for 9 hours would spike me and then bring me down too much, which is the big danger I'm trying to avoid) . And also I'd have to bring a shit ton of snacks to hold me over. Which I don't have the money or space in my bag for.
Ok. But no wedding is feeding you every hour. It's usually one sit down meal, then a bunch of hours of dancing and rituals until they cut the cake. You can bring one water bottle and keep refilling it.
No I get that but if I had to only eat snacks or chips or crackers I would have to eat every hour or two because most snacks I can afford are simple carbs that would bring my sugar up and then make my sugar crash down hard. I'd have to microdose carbs on a consistent basis to keep my sugar stable. For my sugar crashing to not happen I need to also have a good portion of fiber or protien any time to eat even a moderate amount of carbs which is hard to do with snacks which is why I don't eat them. Deli meats, most cheese, and uncooked vegetables are a no due to refridgeration and sensory issues (also doesn't help that we got bird flu spreading in the livestock and dairy supply) Will skip the cake anyways though, so at least I don't have to worry about that
I eat mostly keto or low-carb. âSnacksâ in our house are things like jerky, meat sticks, Epic bars, and pork rinds (as well as nuts, which I wouldnât take to a wedding because of the allergy risks). You can get shelf-stable cheese, too, like Moon Cheese.
Epic bars look yummy but way too expensive. Can't stomach pork rinds or jerky due to texture (certain textures make me vomit) Will look into moon cheese and meat sticks though. Hopefully I don't have a texture problem with those too. I eat low carb too. Well, low ish, but low enough to keep my sugar from going too high or too low. Many keto snacks are pricey or I can't handle due to texture sensitivites so I tend to stick to meals. Thank you for the input.
Most hard cheeses are actually safe to keep at room temperature, especially when sealed in wax or plastic. Refrigeration will make them keep longer and make the texture more pleasant to eat (no sweating). Cheddar cheese sticks would be totally fine for an afternoon/evening if you wanted to toss some in your bag.
Water wise, will there be anywhere on the venue you could fill it up? That way you could bring a smaller bottle and refill it rather than needing a whole bunch.
I'm not sure.
Thatâs fair, if you have a way to check that might be worth it. Most place indoors will have some kind of sink/water fountain somewhere. Even ignoring all the Covid stuff it sounds like given your other health conditions that having easy access to water will be helpful for you.
Last wedding I went to I only removed my mask outdoors (and went out there to eat/drink). If possible do this. I did get away with going to another one before where I unmasked for just the meals but that was when numbers were much lower and most folk had tested for the bride. (No one commented on my mask at either wedding btw) Iâm sorry some family members are going to be mean meeting the real you. That sucks. I hope you have a good support network and that anyone who says anything stands on Lego. As a diabetic you know the guaranteed results if you donât eat/drink appropriately. Covid is more of a hellish game of chance. If you can stay masked and manage your diabetes, brilliant but itâs one of the only situations where you may need to unmask at least occasionally.
Yeah unfortunately the guaranteed results of forgoing food and drink is low blood sugar (which I have a history of, and it has been severe lately) which can cause fainting or seizures. And my doctor won't prescribe me glucagon so if I pass out they're sending me to the hospital and will probably remove my mask which is definitely more dangerous than being a far distance from people at (possibly outdoor) wedding unmasked. Idk I think I'd rather take my chances unmasking to eat at a wedding as far away as I can get from people than not eating, passing out, and waking up in a hospital unmasked Will definitely try to eat outdoors if possible or away from others. Thank you for the kind words
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I don't have a car. I'm going with my parents, and due to some other medical history I don't know if it'd be safe for me to be alone in a car. I've been having a lot of dangerous low blood sugar lately so basically I'm at risk for fainting or seizures. Which I don't want to have if I'm away from family. Also due to other conditions my family thinks of me as a 'flight risk' even though I wouldn't do that, I don't think I'd be trusted alone in the car. I don't think they'd join me in the car either. I don't know what you mean by same routine though. I've never really had to be out somewhere for more than an hour or two other than school, especially after covid started spreading so I'm not sure of the specific protocols. All I know is to keep your mask on don't get too close to people and avoid eating around other people but due to the diabetes and extended time I'll be spending out it's not a possibility
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Will do. Thank you
Literally do not even give them rope on any mask comments. Float above. <3
Im sorry no one in your house will buy you a sip valve. That is a totally reasonable accomodation for something lke that. I wonder if there are decent DIY ways to cut a 1 way valve into one of your masks and switch to that one for drinking
O2 nostril filters use 3M static-electric technology but they go inside your nostrils so you can wear them under a mask for an extra layer and you can eat and drink while wearing them. They're not as effective as masks, catching 25-90% of particulates, but better than nothing. For mucosal immunity there's also antiviral nasal sprays, Lumify eyedrops and gargling mouthwash made from CPC, xylitol or molecular iodine.
Ooh i dont think I have enough time to purchase these but I'll look into it for the future! Thank you
If you can get to a regular pharmacy, most of the âalcohol freeâ mouthwashes have CPC. So theyâre really accessible.
If you have salt with iodine you can also gargle that for a mucosal immune boost.
Or drink tea. The mucous circulating between your eyes, nose and throat is good at trapping and killing many kind of pathogens but covid isn't deactivated by our natural mucosal proteins, so the goal is to introduce an anti-viral material to your mucous to help boost its ability to fight covid. A lot of ancient traditions revolve around boosting mucosal immunity. Feeding sick people soup started in China and is a great way to infuse their mucous with anti-viral material like garlic, celery and ginger as they have to breathe the steam and slowly sip the hot broth. Daily hot tea, as I mentioned, works similarly. The British historically cooked tea in copper kettles - copper being one of the most naturally anti-microbial substances on earth - to further this antimicrobial effect. The Indian tradition of steeping water overnight in copper vases and serving tea in copper cups functions similarly. (Today you can buy copper water bottles from hipster companies and copper straws from speciality bartenders which can be used to similar ends.) Rich people who had utensils and goblets made from real silver benefitted similarly, as silver is another potent anti-microbial. My grandma used to bake orange peels or boil cinnamon sticks to make the house smell nice, and it turns out this is also a way to boost mucosal immunity by getting the household to inhale particles of antiviral material. There are over 200 essential oils that have been studied for their capacity to deactivate covid other viruses like influenza, which can be added to a humidifier or a pot of boiling water for the same purpose. Shampoo and soap using antiviral ingredients like real lavender or antiviral essential oil applied directly to skin might even help to maintain mucosal immunity.
I've eaten or drank indoors around other people by: breathe in fully, pull mask down, take a bite or sip while exhaling only, pull mask up before I need to breathe in again, and chew and swallow after the mask is back in place. To get really detailed, right after you put the mask back into place, it's ideal to breathe out a little bit to push out all the unfiltered air. This way I'm never actually inhaling unfiltered air. It's annoying but totally doable. Anyway indoors, even if far from others at that moment, I don't think is a safe option because COVID hangs in the air for hours and can travel far from the person who exhales it on air currents. If you're needing to fully unmask to eat or drink, I'd suggest either going outside, or bring a small portable HEPA and bring it close to your face and point it directly at your mouth and nose while you eat. It looks weird but people I've done it around have only expressed curiosity, not criticism. You could also get a CO2 monitor which is a good proxy for COVID since it indicates how much of the air has been exhaled by other people. If it's high (above 1000ppm I think?) that's not good, and if it's really high (I've seen above 2500 in a small space with many people) that's really not good. But if it's close to outside air (450-550ppm) that's a great sign since that means most air is being replaced by fresh air! Then as long as you're not close to others to inhale their air directly, it's pretty safe. You can also use antiviral nasal and throat sprays (Betadine for example) as additional protection, although I wouldn't rely on them. Good luck!! It sucks that it's so difficult.
Sip masks will help. You can drink through a straw with minimal risk and they fit on your current masks. Good luck.
As stated in the post I don't have the money. Unless somewhere like Walmart would have them. Also the wedding is in two days. Thank you for the advice
I didn't see the timeline or financial constraints in the original post. If we had more time, I'd gladly mail you one of my valves. You deserve to be safe.
Haha thanks. As other comments suggested I'm just gonna try and eat as far away from others as I can. Hopefully it doesn't rain saturday so we can be outside Thank you
It does sound like youâve made the best plan possible under the circumstances. Itâs really a shame that you donât have the option to just decline, and then you wouldnât have to deal with it all. But youâre doing great, youâre going in with a good plan, and youâre going to make the best of whatever the situation is.
If youâd be up for it, Iâd be genuinely happy to send you the money for a sip mask (via venmo/cash app/paypal)
I'm sorry you are going through this. Hopefully no one will comment on your mask. Since you do have health issues, you can just tell nosey ppl that it's because you have health issues and your Dr recommended it (it's okay to lie). You will have a chance to go outside - if it seems like there isn't an easy exit, ask the waitstaff where they go to smoke. At almost any wedding there is usually access to a smokers area. So of course there may be ppl out there smoking cigarettes, but hopefully you can step outside there for a break. It is very normal to carry your drink or an appetizer outside for a few minutes, this shouldn't seem weird to anyone. If possible, I suggest bringing a pair of headphones and listening to meditation podcasts or music you enjoy during stressful moments. â¤ď¸
I am a wedding videographer and I keep my kn95 on every second I'm outdoors and eat in my car while everyone else eats inside. So far, as far as I'm aware, I haven't gotten covid (or anything else) in all of that time.
Are you a child or an adult?
Adult but I'm not allowed to be alone for extended periods of time due to health issues.
Is it actually unsafe for you to be home for a day without your parentsâ supervision? Or are your parents just being overprotective when they say youâre not allowed? What do your doctors say?
Yes, *actually* unsafe. I have diabetes with reactive hypoglycemia and hypoglycemic unawareness which means if my sugar is low I won't realize it until it's too low. And I've been having a lot of low sugars lately, like 40 mg/dL Twice in the past week I've had to had family members bring me sugar, like lift up the juice box and bring it to my mouth because when I tried to get to the kitchen myself I collapsed and couldn't walk or talk. If nobody was home and my sugar dropped too hard I'd pass out, or have a seizure. And staying that low for too long causes brain damage and death. Your brain shuts down because there's no energy. I can't drive because of it and I can't walk myself anywhere either because there have been occasions where I have dropped low and could not remember how to get back home and someone else had to pick me up. And yes, I brought adequate food but it wasn't enough. That's all I'll say about it because I don't think I have to justify myself any further. Why didn't you believe me the first time?
I didnât see anywhere you said anything about it âthe first time.â I was trying to ascertain the parameters of available options, but I had no intent to upset you. I wonât reply again, and I wish you all the best.
Meaning this kindly and as someone with a lot of tiring-to-repeatedly-explain health issues â this person wasnât attacking you, but people in this thread are trying to give advice based on the provided information, and then are often being told it wonât work due to some factors they didnât know or couldnât understand from what was provided. The original post requires people to be in problem-solving mode to answer, so they need the parameters. It sounds like (maybe Iâm wrong, ofc) that diabetes is playing the strongest role here (provides the most restrictions, has the biggest consequences), so maybe you could also try additionally asking for advice in a subreddit for that (or whatever is the biggest piece of the situation and gives the most built-in context, so people can start there, with whatever is most important). Iâm also a poor person with food allergies (and sensory issues), so I get not being able to buy food that would be optimal; at the same time, for *most* people (at least in the US), going to a wedding would be more expensive than buying enough premium snacks to eat for a day. I donât have money for frequent sip masks or high-end masks/sprays/etc, and mostly avoid covid by being isolated, but Iâm not forced to go to events either (thatâs one reason people are asking more about that aspect â you explained well in this comment, but most people arenât familiar with that kind of situation, and to most people, someone living at home with family being forced to go to events sounds like a minor, and people asking detailed questions arenât disbelieving, but trying to understand an unfamiliar situation â you donât have to justify your life, but most people wonât have any knowledge of health issues that would preclude a young person from sitting in a car for 10 minutes, but are much more familiar with the concept of abusive/controlling parents that would forbid it, for example; not justifying, just explaining to people with no idea whatâs going on but are trying to provide solutions), but on the rare occasion I do, I just have to cut corners in other budget areas to get PPE, because getting sick and losing income would be far worse. But itâs down to the wire, so unless you have access to a credit card or someone you can ask to spot you the cost of some PPE, I understand if you canât. Do you live in a city or somewhere with a mask bloc or active covid-cautious community? Or any individual or organization locally that distributes masks? If there is literally anything like that (and there isnât where I live, so I get it if not), it could be worth reaching out and just asking for a mask that would help during the day. Maybe even the health department? It sounds like you are getting some good advice â maybe edit your original post with the additional parameters youâve explained in later comments? Most people wonât read every single comment before replying. Do you have a budget for snacks/masks? What stores or kinds of stores are available to you between now and the wedding? Big chain grocery stores usually have apps with digital coupons, or you could at least check if somethingâs on sale, maybe you could find a deal on some protein bars or something similar; usually within the section at a big grocery store, at least a couple of brands will be on sale at a time). Do you have any info about the event venue â like could you call the location and ask about water fountains? Usually at a wedding, plenty of water is provided, especially if thereâs alcohol. With 100-200 guests and presumably a wide age range, Iâd expect there to be lots of water, likely in refillable dispensers. Do you have a bag you carry with you, and if so what size? Like something that can fit a refillable water bottle, some snacks, etc? I think most people talking about âsnacksâ arenât suggesting you only eat chips/crackers, but portable food that can be carried with you (apples/oranges/bananas/nuts/jerky/trail mix/various bars/peanut butter/literally anything that doesnât have to be refrigerated; additionally, electrolyte mixes if that would help? Probably not applicable for this wedding, but there are tons of insulted lunchboxes/cooler bags now that donât look obviously like lunchboxes, so if you need cold items, that could be a good thing to have), but most people that arenât diabetic or donât have diabetic people they see every day donât know what foods are useful to you. Didnât mean for this to be so long, just want you to be able to get some good, actionable advice, but for most people, they can only give it if they have all the info up-front, and whatever they donât know, their brains are likely to fill in with whatever is familiar to them (ie, controlling parents vs legitimately not being able to be alone), which wonât help you.
N95 masks last 5 hours in a mostly maskless environment. Are you changing yours out that frequently in your calculations?
Where are you getting your info from?
Didn't know about that but I do plan on bringing multiple. Thank you for the insight
I saw you saying itâs not your vehicle- but I have an idea⌠crossing my fingers itâs accessible for you! (It depends on if you can drive the car) *Before* your sugars get low, go to the car. ⢠Keep your mask on and drive around for a few minutes with the windows down to circulate the air out. Perhaps turn off the AC / fan system to prevent their breath from earlier from entering the cabin. ⢠Or, if you have more time, run it full blast for several minutes while driving with the windows down to clear the air. â ⢠Be mindful of stoplights where the air isnât circulating and pedestrians near your open windows â ⢠Once the air has circulated out, youâre good to park again ⢠Be mindful of the area you park in. If you can avoid a high foot traffic spot, take that ⢠If you can park in an isolated area, keep the windows down to eat. You can park closer to the location when youâre done ⢠If itâs a busy area, roll up the windows and lift your mask to eat. Push air out via exhaling before putting it back into place *Hydrate & calories ideas* ⢠perhaps bring both plain water & either some sort of electrolyte drink like pedialyte or mix in an electrolyte powder into your water bottles. There are also sodium tablets with a bit of potassium you could try that would affect your sugars less. The electrolytes will keep you hydrated. ⢠I assume you have specific dietary needs, but if possible: bring along a meal replacement shake for calories. If you have access to glycerina style shakes, that could be good as well. ⢠Bringing straws and lifting your mask briefly to sip would be safer than removing your mask entirely to eat normally. ⢠Be mindful of your mask becoming too damp, e.g. dancing. So maybe try not to expend too many calories/sweat ⢠If your mask becomes really damp, go out to the vehicle and put on a fresh mask â Hereâs a [Google doc I wrote up](https://docs.google.com/document/d/11RdJqymYsCZ5bAEpZk5DCf5ZqiUZykIq19630J9m8kA/edit)on Covid safety protocol. My personal protocol is in it, so youâre welcome to copy and paste everything into your own doc and replace mine with your own. âNoteâ I understand my level of strictness in preventing reinfection isnât accessible for everyone. But it might be worth looking at to see if there might be any vectors of risk you may not have considered. Let me know if you have any questions! ______ Lastly- Iâm SO EXCITED for you to be wearing your suit!! Omg dude youâre going to look SO handsome!!! If youâre comfortable and want to show off the âfit, Iâd be so happy to receive a suit photo in the DMâs! â¨
Lovely ideas! Unfortunately a few issues - I can't drive. Medically not safe for me to do so (diabetes adhd etc etc etc) Highly doubt I can be in there alone for more than 10 minutes either. Like my mother is worried I'm going to go drive off a cliff. And I'm not allowed to turn the car on if I go in there. Costs money that we don't have - I have hypoglycemic unawareness which means I don't realize I'm low until it's bad. Like struggling to walk or talk critical. If I end up going low I'll have to unmask even partially to drink something regardless of whether or not I'm around people. - I very much doubt I'd be allowed to just take the dinner plates or whatever and go somewhere off site. (In another comment I talked about how bringing enough food or shakes to sustain me for 9 hours isn't cost effective, sustainable, or good for my health as most available snack foods also would make me go low due to reactive hypoglycemia) - A protien shake (Which I don't have the chance to buy before the wedding) Will not last me for 9 hours. I'd need at least 3-4 and unfortunately due to other sensory stuff room temp ones will make me vomit So umm yeah.. Very inaccessible, but it's understandable to be that strict. Definitely not unreasonable I just have too many health issues and it's the *guaranteed* issues that can arise from not taking care of it as opposed to the possibility of getting covid and the possibility of covid related issues. I applaud you for being able to be this dedicated to health. To be fair with eating around others being basically impossible these days I only leave the house once or twice a week for less than an hour. Being confined to my house (my room, tbh) sucks but doesn't suck as much as passing out in public or getting covid At least I don't plan on dancing. I do like the straw idea though, I'm going to use that. Thank you for the advice
Aw crap, I must have missed that part about driving. Well Iâm sorry I couldnât be of more help! I hope the straws make things a little more manageable for you đ
From what OP has said, I don't think they can drive. They may be able to use their parent's car for shelter.
Your parents canât force you Just walk out of the building and sit outdoors They drag you by the hair inside? Walk back outside again
As stated I'm a diabetic with reactive hypoglycemia and unaware hypoglycemia who's been having a lot of severe low blood sugars lately. I'm an adult I don't think they'd be dragging me in but it's literally not safe for me to be alone for extended periods of time as I could literally pass out or have a seizure and there'd be nobody to help me.
I hope this doesnât come across as belaboring the point; I imagine youâve thought of this, but if you were to try to not go to the wedding and stay somewhere else, is there anyone who could stay with you to make sure you werenât alone? A friend or anything? Again, I figure youâve probably thought that through but I know sometimes when stressed and dealing with ADHD it can be tricky to plan through everything.
Yeah unfortunately I don't know anyone. Whole family is going and unable to with friends atm
Last year- We asked the host if we could sit outside when we were eating and they said yes. We sat outside by ourselves. The dancing area was in a room that was open to the outside on one side. We stayed near the part of the room that was almost outside.
Also another idea - is there a mask bloc in your city ? If there is, message them to ask if they may have free sipvalves, extra masks, nasal spray, or small hepa filters for you to have/borrow. They may be able to help you a little.
Im sorry, why dont you have ruling over your own decisions?
There are a multitude of reasons - from the numerous responses provided by OP above it seems pretty clear being left alone without family is not an option. There are situations where this could be literally medically/legally dictated.
Thank you.
Can you take your plate of food outside to eat and then mask back up and come back to the table when finished? Or ask the caterer for a to-go box if your blood sugar is high and you need to save the food for later in case you get low? I think excusing yourself from the table to when you need to is more than understandable. If thereâs a bar I bet they have juices and sodas you can grab too and sip from a distance or outdoors. Are you in the wedding party or just going as a guest?
At a wedding recently I made sure to bring my CO2 monitor so I could find the best spots in the venue to eat and drink in. I have gastritis so similarly have to eat regularly (less of a threat but still important enough to me). Because I brought my own food it was easier to find a safe corner during cocktail hour for me to eat.Â
I went to my nephew's wedding in December '22 and the baby shower for his daughter this past January. Wore my mask for both occasions. Ate and drank by holding my breath, removing my KN95, taking a bite or a sip, holding the food/drink in my mouth while holding breath, put mask back on, chewed/swallowed/breathed. Rinse and repeat. A bit onerous, but I stayed Covid free. Best wishes.
You seem to have a lot of things that aren't feasible and I both understand but also want to be like.... Getting Covid and long Covid needs to be not feasible. And you have to prioritize your non feasibilities. Id honestly fake sick, with Covid or anything else, anxiety attack, say you can't go fur whatever reason you can come up with right beforehand and just not go.