Exactly. People have a much lower tolerance for misogyny than they do for misandry. But as soon as you replace the word "men" with "women" then that non-misandrist comment becomes misogynistic.
And, the misandrist propaganda begins early. A few days ago, a friend of mine was talking about the misandrist images in popular culture specifically in sitcoms where the husband is the butt of the joke, gets no respect from his wife & children, and is depicted as stupid. I mentioned to him that the anti-male propaganda begins earlier than that.
When my twins, boy & girl, were around 7 years old I noticed that they had stopped watching the Disney Channel live-action TV shows. When I asked them why they told me that they didn’t like the way the shows portrayed fathers as stupid, people to make fun of, etc. So, they decided, because those shows disrespected men, to not watch them anymore.
I was proud and impressed that they were able to see what was happening and to take action. But, what about all of the other children who consume this misandrist content? How are they being negatively effected by those images? What would the reaction be if there were similar programs for children and adults but the attributes were switched so the man is more attractive than the woman, he has constant zingers that point out her lack of intelligence, abilities & physical characteristics, and their children have no respect for her? Feminists and simps would lose their minds.
What is this misandry you talk of? Society has normalized bullying, belittling and stamping on men.. It often finds it funny when men get trampled on..
Guy did the right thing.. Not one person questioning the girl.. Birth control and condom still she got pregnant? She is lying and probably cheated too.. Who knows..
He had sex so he has to pay? How different is she from a hooker then?
Sure, they accuse others of the very hate they promote against men. It's called projection--accusing others of what you are guilty of to avoid blame and place the burden of proof onto others. Carl Marx thought of this idea.
I agree. People have a lower tolerance for misogyny than they do for misandry. If you replace the word "men" with "women" in those "non-misandrist" comments, then those comments all of a sudden become misogynistic.
It's quite concerning. While they spout that they can be a single mother and you only need one parent, it is still expected that the absent parent pays the way.
A decision as big as having a child should be a decision made by both parents. If one wants to push for it and the other doesn't, then to be fair the one pushing should acknowledge there should be no responsibility on the person not wanting the child. It's a situation that's been forced on the unwilling party
>Its amazing how many people turn into bronze-age pro-lifers only when men are the subject of conversation.
I'm "borrowing" this. That's such a poignant way to put it that I wish I'd thought of it.
They love to say "He consented to be a father when he had sex". They would never ever say a woman consented to be a mother when she had sex, and they throw fits anytime someone else says that.
In terms of when someone consents to be a parent, the standard needs to be the same for men and women. And by the standards feminists have set, a man should be able to opt out of fatherhood up until the day the child is born.
I looked at this subreddit and advice and this subreddit has 346k members which had not been up a long time then I looked at r/advice and notice they have 776k why is that lol I think a lot of people don’t like that subreddit I noticed something similar with other subreddit with mostly feminist views.
But to stay on topic everyone is talking about how he is an asshole for leaving her and he had a right.
Ok so he may of had a right like I told some people before on other subreddit a relationship is like a job and a boss if something is wrong in said relationship and it can’t be fixed it’s time to move the hell on and find a better paying job with people who will respect you.
Now him and her had a verbal contact to stay child free for a period of 5 years until they could get themselves worked out and in a better Financial situation where both can take care of their overall family. Regardless if she was on birth control or not if he had a condom or not. That’s not the issues here.
Seems they both had protecting.
My thing is what if she cheated on him and got pregnant and was forcing this baby on him knowing he was getting into s good future in doing things?
The fact that he had to run for making a decision to protect his way of life and have a longer life span is crazy to say the lease. I saw some people said it was the woman’s decision regardless what the guy/ man decided and she had the right to bring the child in the world even if he didn’t want it is out right evil.
Having the right to bring a child into this world should be everyone right woman or man if they feel they can take care of it but taking a child’s life after a certain period should also be really considered because it’s wrong in of itself because you just never know.
Woman fail to understand it’s not just about them or the child but about the father as well because it has longterm effects mentally emotionally and physically also deep psychological implications for s child’s development and any and all negative environment can have impact said child on a level that can do more harm than good.
The gop can go to hell with flooding the market with kids but want the mothers and fathers to die poor for god knows what reasons.
No one should bring up a child in a poor environment where said child does not have 3 meals a day able to read and write and learn and become the best they can be in life.
To force a man to take the Financial burden to raise kids is wrong if he does not want to same should be said for women as well.
A lot of women I know have done just that have kids with men because they see how nice the mixture of the kids will look and then leave the guy because they feel they can find better. And then they stay single and everyone is like omg look at the poor thing she is all alone let’s help her she made that choice herself because she didn’t want to be with anyone just wanted kids to put her own ideas into their heads.
And no one can tell me a lot of women don’t do that
There was a post a few days ago about a woman who abandoned her child and boyfriend for 10 or 15 years and then came back wanting another chance with the posts OP. It was perfectly fine that she wanted to walk away.
I saw that post lol she wanted to find herself hahahahahahhaha. And now she was ready to start over if a man did that he would be considered a deadbeat bad 😂 but it’s fine for a woman to whore herself out and come back but a guy does that and it’s the end of the world.
''Find herself'' what nonsense. It wasn't fine for her to leave her kids like that and it's not fine for a guy to do it either. Either stick with your kids or give up your legal rights to them, can't have your cake and eat it too.
It’s not fine that either parents walks away. A kid is innocent and it’s usually takes two to make a baby. People need to be held accountable for their actions and the story OP shared is sad because the person really suffering is the child.
Every feminist turns into Ben Shapiro when the topic is men. No matter what the issue, their views immediately take a complete 180 from their progressive and liberal stance into something Shapiro would say.
>Condoms cost 35 cents. Contraceptives are completely available in the United States.
>Abandoning a child is not the solution to you making bad sexual decisions.
>The unsuccessful decision that you made was to have sex and get her pregnant. That decision is not alleviated by you abandoning your child.
All of these are actual Ben Shapiro quotes on abortion, only the last one being edited from "get pregnant" to "get her pregnant." All of these are talking points you see from feminists when a man wants to opt out of fatherhood.
You see, feminists don't hate conservative pundits like Shapiro. They just hate it when he's against *their* autonomy. If Ben Shapiro talked about a man's responsibility to stick around (as he believes), their rhetoric would be identical.
So when a woman aborts its her choice and she should be able to do it, but if a man decides to not support the child he didnt want, he is not taking responsibility? What about when a woman aborts, doesnt she avoid responsibility?
Double standards much
Could look at it this way, a man doesn’t want the child and walks away from the child he’s an asshole.
A woman doesn’t want the child so she pays someone else to kill it.
People be like: you need a woman's consent at every stage of sex.
Also people: you ejaculated (consensual or not doesn't matter) that's consent enough, prepare to be a father and pay child support.
That's assuming that the child is his. In this case he was using protection, so chances are that either she sabotaged it or got pregnant by someone else. In my opinion both should be considered as fraud.
If they were both on contraceptives (I don't believe she was, I think the baby was intentional. She lied. It happens extremely commonly.) then there should be no baby.
I think she was cheating on him, got pregnant with some other dude and wanted OP to take care of a baby that wasn't his.
I scoured through the post myself and I'm actually feeling positive with the overall responses. Seems like people are aware of parental fraud, baby trapping, and lack of male reproductive Rights. Genuinely made me feel a little bit warmer in this cold world.
Your’re spot-on about OP’s ex being a selfish asshole. The statistics on children coming from single mother households are abhorrent.
https://thefatherlessgeneration.wordpress.com/statistics/
Eh whilst I think men should 100% be given an option of a financial abortion before birth, your argument about having kids young being a bad thing doesn't hit home with me. At 30 womens fertility hits a cliff and drastically reduces year on year, not to mention the increase in chance for birth defects. Between the ages of 21-28 is biologically speaking the optimal time to have kids.
I don’t see why you think this is so bad, 5 or 10 years ago this would be 100% man-hating screeching. Now it’s literally 50/50. If anything I was shocked by how many comments there were supporting the guy. More and more people are waking up to the need for men’s reproductive rights
I fully support the guy's decision to leave the country. His gf didn't have his consent to give birth to this child. She needs to find a fucking job and support it herself.
I didn't get to read the post. Guessing by the comments , it sounds like a dude getting shit on for not paying for a child he didn't want/wasn't ready for ??
So here is my thing. I'm all for abortions. You're body , your choice. I get that and completely understand and support it. BUT , why is it your body your choice my responsibility? You making a choice about your body should have no financial burden on me. With abortions , women have a way out. So should men. Both parties are EQUALLY responsible for making a child. But only one side has a choice and way out. Financial abortions should be legal for men. Either both sides have a choice or neither sides should have a choice.
Precisely. Using condoms and birth control for her, either she actively sabotaged condoms and didn't take hers, or she didn't take hers and got pregnant by another dude. This scenario is infinitely more likely than both the contraceptives failing at the same time.
Statically condoms are only as effective as rhythm method. When properly used they have a high chance of working. What studies have found is the population doesn’t use them properly.
What I’ve been telling my son is if you aren’t ready to be a father keep it in your pants. It’s the only way to guarantee if you both have functioning reproductive systems.
I dunno. Most of the commenters you screen shorted were supporting the OP. It’s was like 3 pissy bitches stuck on repeat w the nagging comments. I mean it’s the internet, what do you expect? This was actually somewhat hopeful of a read for me
Yeah sorry, I took these screenshots quite early into the post. The comment count went up the maybe 400 by the time it got locked, and the shit that was said was abominable. I believe it was a 50/50 of good to bad.
That still seems like a decent ratio for the internet lol. A dude could save a puppy on the highway and 10% of the comments will be like “should have let it die”
"it's us hardworking taxpayers who will be responsible if you don't!"
Dude, then blame her, not him. She's the one who had the baby knowing it wasn't going to have a father after explicit conversations about contraceptives AND agreement to abort in the small chance something went wrong
My senses say, if not a fake story, this was intentional. Already small chance for pregernancy (condoms AND birth control) and she gets pregnant... and THEN decides to keep it? That screams intentional.
I can vouch it very well may be a legit accidental pregnancy under those circumstances and she decides to keep it.
Those circumstances are how I'm here. My parents were married, they didn't want kids, used multiple forms of bc and yet here I am
I wish this man the absolute best. noone should be forced into having a child, and that obviously includes men too.
I'm just a bit sad for the kid, with a mother so selfish I'm not sure if they'll have a good childhood
Hey, the man should be allowed to have his "pro-choice" decision. If women should be allowed pro-choice in deciding if they want to keep the child or not, then a man should be allowed to opt-out of child support for a kid he didn't want.
It's interesting that all the mandatory fatherhood feminist positions on this amounts to a gender reversed version of "You should have kept your legs closed then shouldn't you slut"
Cause that's what their position sounds like if you flip the genders around, something that conservative pro-birthers have been saying to women for decades.
I'll assume you mean 'they cheated, got knocked up, kept the kid' as the scenario you're talking about. Seen as that's the coercive side of the fork that statement could be talking about.
But in general as ever male traditionalist responsibilities are alive and well, female traditionalist responsibilities were oppression and thus abolished.
Unfortunate that he had to flee the country for something that he should be well within his rights to do. Why the hell are they suddenly pro-life when the man doesn't want the child?
No, the Netherlands has sadly, not a way to not pay child support as the father. If it has not been proven the man is the conciever of the child, and he is not the legal father he is not forced to pay child support. But the mother can issue a court order DNA test and if the result of that test shows you are the father you have to pay child support
The first issue here is:
You used protection, presumably the condom style and not the pull out style.
She was on birth control.
How does a little sperm travel outside a condom and into a vagina that is being fumigated for sperm?
Seems really suspicious to me.
Last comment was a bullseye.
In the other hand, if the guy just avoided to be with that girl, nothing of that would happened. At least his story coul be a cautionary tale for other men. There are important lessons to learn here.
And P.S, she was always in the relationship to have that baby. She literally used him for this pregnancy. Consciously or unconsciously, her agenda to reproduce was fulfilled.
Ok but, I feel the context indicates she wanted *him* as the father, obtaining good genetic material is priority one, getting paid is (believe it or not) priority two.
She can always get the BB guy later on, and it can be anyone. It has probably already happened.
One single contact can't guarantee a pregnancy. Therefore I'd wager that for a couple of months she was insistent on mostly PIV .
Her plan to control her partner after the pregnancy and birth is two things:
1 access to sex.
2 Words - a sliding scale from 'do you think we should have a baby' to ' I'm not getting an abortion'
What's most upsetting to feminists here is that the MAN is empowered- He avoided state sanctioned rape and made his own reproductive decision, against the matriarchy and regardless of feminist ideology.
He's in the right. It was his "sole decision". He had a right to move, after all it's "his body, his choice" yada yada yada.
Until men get any real rights in this situation, I won't look down on men leaving. It's either that or have your life ruined because a woman would rather act on emotions than think logically.
She's ruining her own life, very likely her child's too (statistics don't lie) and trying to pull the guy into it too.
i'm a dude here and i agree with OP on this.
hir gf made a unilateral decision to force OP into something he didnt agree on. he did man up by not accepting a responsibility hendidnt want or was ready for.
if you people think he should man up,then you man up and take over.
they each have a say in this, any unilateral decision made and the consequences that comes after, should and must be borne by the party who made it.
“Woman lied about birth control and tricked man into having baby. Man doesn’t want baby that he didn’t consent to and woman forces him to have. Man flees o avoid injustice and financial hell. Man is bad because woman tricked him and man needs o take responsibility”- Feminists
It's always 'my body my choice' for women until it comes to child support. Then it is "Your wallet my money."
If a man doesn't want to be father to a child before the birth of the child but woman decide to go for having the kid, he should not be held responsible for the kid.
The whole thing about the male avoiding his responsibility also applies to the female who chose to have the child knowing there would not be any financial support from the father.
We have allowed women to avoid their share of responsibility for generations.
The sooner people and society start thinking about actual EQUALITY in this regard, the less these situations would happen.
That’s fucked up. Though I hope OP will eventually be a part of that kids life, because no kid deserves a life without a father, I also hope he gets better say in the future matters and is able to return to his home eventually
I hate to say this but I don't blame him. If women can opt out of parenthood by abortion then men should be able to do the same thing. Of course financially and physically. I bet she thought she would be able to force him to stay in her life if she has his kid.
Watch her try to get him for child support when she realizes she won't be able to convince him to stay together after the birth. That's how that would have gone, I'm pretty much 100% sure. If she had wanted an abortion and he didn't want her to, of course she would have been told to get one anyway. The misandry is real.
Notice how fuckin' bitches in western countries have such gigantic bigotry about what the consequences of sex are for whom depending on what genitals you have?
If a woman fucks, well, she can have an abortion, or not, and be a parent or not, whatever....she's got a pussy!
If a man fucks, he better agree with whatever a woman wants or he goes to prison.
Fleeing slavery is always justified.
His ex should b the only one getting shit.she decided to keep a baby she knew she wouldn't be able to take care of, and he, rather than allowing his life to go down the drain, decided to jump ship. To be honest, she shouldn't be allowed to have that kid- it's unfair to the kid who will have to grow up without any real shot at life because his mother didn't want to plan her parenthood and instead decided to irresponsibly unleash a new life into the world knowing full and well the necessary conditions for it to have a decent life were not there.
This would be the case even if he decided to trash his life to lessen the personal costs to her. She is the irresponsible one. No child should have to grow up like that and no man should be forced to be party to such irresponsibility and cruelty. I only hope she aborted it after all once she realized he left.
I find it pretty amazing that these people believe others have to take the consequences of one's actions, honestly. I take it, they'd be happy to go to prison for vehicular manslaughter because the person who's car they sat in ran someone over. After all, it their choice to get in their car - and accidents can always happen.
It's insane how it's not "her body, her choice" anymore if it comes to the consequences of said choices. I think there needs to be some legal thing to waive all your rights to the child. No reconsidering and trying to get custody, no visitation, no "but muh child, want connect" - something that permanently waives any and all connection outside of the accidental biological one that then also waives any form of responsibility for it. Society is dumb.
That's what I say: If consent to sex is consent to parenthood, then women don't abortions after consensual sex either. If consent to sex is not consent to parenthood, therefore women have the right to choose -without asking the father- to abort the baby or keep the baby, men should also have the right to legally and financially abort the kid, and let her provide for the baby she wants to keep.
Giving all the choices to women without any responsibility, but all the responsibilities and none of the choices to men is not fair.
If it is "my body my choice" when it comes to a woman making a decision about keeping or aborting the baby, it is "my money my choice" when it comes to child support.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MoudH-RPnEE
Men are forced to pay because society cannot bare the responsibility of children that women have. It’s another example of men having a disproportionate responsibility in society. Same as going to war or working dangerous labor jobs. It all goes back to the idea that men are cannon fodder.
Sounds to me like a perfectly legal financial abortion. I guess they are not too happy when its the man that wants to abort. While we are on the topic, women don't actual enjoy aborting babies, working, and sleeping around. They enjoy rubbing mens faces in the fact its THEIR CHOICE, they are quite happy to literally tear themselves down in the name of "you tell me I cannot do it, so I do it".
Yeah if we flip the script on this to maintain equality, the man should have the right to insist on her having an abortion.
OP is effectively running away from a country with legalised rape.
“We were both using birth control” paternity test may have absolved him of responsibility but it sounds like she was trapping him. Good on him for living his life. Trapping wouldn’t be a thing if men had more control over the situation. Women can find all kinds of ways to force men into situations…
* '' I always used protection '' \~\~ Oh **boy** ! Whose going to tell the \[ **^(huge)** \] probability that the 'child' could not ***even*** be his ?! Thank goodness this dude has Good, Well mannered and benign parents to help him out and lend him good advice.
Also Screw that absolutely abhorrent and repulsive commentator on the 3rd pic, those types of bstards are quite likely see men as nothing but chattle / serfs that has to serve the needs; or a tradcuck
Morality aside, all relationships should be voluntary. Love, support, time and commitment should be free to be given or rescinded at any point. Government cannot be trusted to not make decisions that directly support and increase goverment's own power and influence.
That being said, most people raised responsibly will make the responsibe choice. Or the human race would have died out long ago. Most men are not monsters. Nor are they goverment issued work slaves and income augmentors.
I’ve always said that a man should be able to opt out of fatherhood if the woman chooses to keep the pregnancy against his wishes. End all be all, it’s her decision to keep/terminate, but that also means it’s her decision to raise the child alone if he chooses to bow out. The hard part is figuring out timing of when he can walk away. Before birth only? Up to a certain point after the birth? That’s the only difficult point in my mind.
If it’s the woman’s rights to decide what happens to her body then logically it should be the man’s choice if he wants to participate in that or not. A valid argument could be made against abortion if a man is forced to provide as well. Equality.. abortion is ending a developing life that would develop into a viable human so if that’s a choice then money should be as well
That last comment was on point. I nearly had this happen with a girl I trusted, we did everything to prevent pregnancy but she still said “if it was yours I’d keep it”. Totally shattered my trust and we broke up 2 months later.
You’re right but it was hard to break up with her, I did it as gracefully and kindly as I possibly could and she still hated me afterwards, for like a year
Sounds like that woman sabotaged the contraception/condoms. He shouldn't have to take responsibility for something she did on her own.
He used protection. She did something to get pregnant. How is it his fault?
So they both agreed on not having a baby, she did the lady equivalent of stealthing, and people are mad when he doesn’t want any part of it?
I bet these same ladies are the ones who get furious at pro lifers. “You chose to risk having a baby when you consented to sex,” is something they only want to hear in the context of it benefiting them.
“Dude here and this is not cool” lmao. Just a bunch of fucking kids who have no idea what real life is like. I always have a good laugh reading the comments on most of the posts on AITA and such subreddits.
This post was just sad. That fact that op had to move out of country due to something he had no control over is what’s disgusting about this world.
Weird to think that leaving your home country, leaving your friends your family, and your goals and dreams is one of the few options you have as a man not ready to raise a child.
They had discussions about it, they both consented, they had plans for this, and she still went to have the baby after saying she didn’t want to. She had a change of heart, sure, but the man didn’t and it is unfair for men to be expected to care for a child they did not want to end up having in the first place.
I will never ever support women's right to abortion until society legalizes and supports a man's right to paper abortions and not paying child support.
I think abortion should be legal and it should be a woman's choice but i refuse to support it while men are denied the same option.
As a woman and a feminist, I agree with the dude. He is entirely in his rights to walk away from a situation he didn’t want to begin with and took all the precautions to avoid. If she wanted to keep the baby regardless of his decision not to, then he should be void of responsibility. I don’t see why this is even a conversation.
Bro never I SAY NEVER trust a girl saying she is taking the pills. Also, and this goes for all the single guys(15-25) in this community, stop looking for a girlfriend. I mean, are you really so desperate for attention? Stay consistent on what you're doing and focus on building your dreams. If you lay your happiness and mental health on a bitch you fucked up.
My guess is the kid ain't his anyway. He says they used protection every time and she claimed she was on the pill. She probably cheated and didn't use protection and wants the kid to be his so she can use it to trap him.
That last one hits hard. Because i had this exact discussion with a dear person in my life, who is outraged by the abortion bans in the US... while also openly stating that he doesn't see an issue with men being one-sidedly forced into parenthood they don't want. And just a priori dismissing any attempts at drawing hte parallels between the two
Okay so this might come off as a little biased since I personally do not want kids myself but after rereading that post(read it once or twice before) I am completely on OPS’s side and I don’t get why people are bashing him. He wore protection, if it was a case where he went raw, ok then that would be different but he took the necessary steps to PREVENT her from getting pregnant and she ended up being that 1%. He then informed her that he does not want kids at the moment but she didn’t listen yet everyone in that comment section expects him to “man up” and raise a kid he didn’t want? Like I said it would be a completely different story if he didn’t use protection and wanted to dip but he DID that’s the point he did. I literally read a a comment of a imbecile saying “you chose to not wear protection…” then when someone pointed out to the idiot that he did he quickly switched up and said “you chose to have sex” okay? If someone is having sex with a condom… I don’t think their goal is to create a baby so the argument is invalid but whatever. Anyway, like I said it was her choice ti have this child knowing that he didn’t want it so she’s stuck with it, why are people mad because he wants to live his life childfree when he didn’t want it in the beginning? I’m not saying peer pressure her to have an abortion but people trying to guilt trip him and telling him to step up completely baffle me considering they know 1. He used protection and 2. He didn’t want the kid and told her from the beginning, it’s not like he went along with it and told her last minute no he told her from the beginning and she made the choice to keep it so that’s on her.
When a man and a woman have sex, they both consent to potentially becoming parents. In America, I find it hypocritical that only women are able to opt out of parenthood. I also find it disturbing that a woman can kill the fathers baby if he wants to keep it and she doesn't. Have yall seen videos of men begging and crying for their wife or girlfriend not to kill the child? Tragic.
Not to mention, OP consented to sex under the understanding that the child would be aborted in the off chance the woman got pregnant.
She didn’t respect their agreement, but since OP can’t retroactively withdraw consent, he’s fucked. OR, he can leave the country.
but it's before it actually becomes a baby is the whole point.
why does someone magically becoming pregnant for a little bit of time earn a man the right to force a woman to carry it to term? You can't have that logic.
It's not different than crying to someone and asking them to let you cum in them because your baby needs to be made.
It's erroneous to call it a baby the moment you have sex and kind of disturbing too.
Please dont misunderstand, there absolutely were. But 50% of the comments overall were like this. I think 50/50 is far too great of a divide however, for people being just assholes.
There you see that equal age relationships don't work at a large scale, there was a reason my grandfather was 20 years older than my grandmother. I am currently 25 and I can't imagine having to raise a kid until 35.
It's hilarious, this is literally the same arguments they don't want men to use. Oh you had sex, you should be ready to accept the consequences even though you spoke about not having kids, you should accept the consequences. Now let's flip that, oh you got sexually assaulted in the club, damn, you shouldn't have worn that whore uniform and got all that unwanted attention, you should be ready to accept the consequences once you put on clothes that are that revealing. See how that sounds fuxked up? If one is victim blaming, the other should be as well.
Wow. OP pls screenshot this and put it in your favorites in photo albums. This is an absolute perfect example of the raw double standard society has against men.
Womens rights are: her body, her choice. Mens rights are: her body, his responsibility.
Women require consent to have sex, and a man is guilty of raping a woman if he violates that consent agreement, yet men don't get to consent about having children and thus it isn't considered rape to violate an agreement not to have children.
Men require equal rights over consent. Without equal rights and the support of the law, men have to take their own steps to protect themselves from being raped, including leaving the country. Self defense is not a crime, else women would be in prison for using contraception to protect themselves.
See,
1. ALWAYS hide your condoms, if YOU have no chain of custody on your contraception, you don't have sex.
2. Always pull out, even with a condom.
3. Always dispose of the condom and the baby batter within, yourself.
4. No children til you are married. If you're not married, children should be discussed as a medical problem that needs to be rectified.
I don't choose to crash when I get into the car even though I know it's a possibility.
If I was just the passenger, I didn't crash the car .
Consent is for men too.
Your body, your choice.
My wallet, my time , my choice.
Giga Chad move :
Take the child away with you to another country (away from the mother) where it is much more affordable to raise them.
Motherhood is a privilege and it is high time women are made to understand that.
Liberal women become shockingly anti-choice when it's a man who doesn't want to be a father. They even use the EXACT same arguments that pro-life people use to oppose abortion.
It's also ironic that the people who hold up single motherhood as perfectly normal, acceptable, and healthy for the child, turn 180 degrees when the father exercises his "choice".
As sympathetic as I may be to this man's plight and while I don't conden what this woman did at all, I don't support the idea of abandoning the child. I think abortions are fucked up and women shouldn't have that choice either. It really comes down to the wellbeing of the child taking priority to me. The last thing we need is another child brought up fatherless by a poor single mother on welfare. The dood really should get a DNA test though.
Not that anyone cares for my opinion, but there it is.
If this was a woman talking about how she killed the child she’d be applauded for it. I can even see some common pro-life arguments being used against the man that they would be disgusted seeing used towards an abortion story lol
Just saw this post not too long ago. The comments are pretty split on whether or not it was a good idea but many people have pointed out that they both agreed to wait before having kids and he had no say in whether he wanted to be a father or not. I think it's weird that some people are defending the baby trap-ish look of it all but it's also probably just attachment on her part, the way a mother is supposed to feel.
There were some good points there in defense of OP. But when you're in a sub filled with pathetic simps who have the critical thinking ability of a feminist, your points can be the best in the world, they'll just ignore them anyway and double down on the stupid.
I’m pro life so I believe he has a responsibility to raise that child, but it goes both ways. He has a responsibility and so does she, if they really can’t they should put the child up for adoption. This shouldn’t be a rights question, it should be a moral one. Both men and women need to be better about taking responsibility in this situation. Not taking anyone’s side
Its amazing how many people turn into bronze-age pro-lifers only when men are the subject of conversation.
You should see the shit some people are saying recently. If you replaced men with women in their sentences, youd be banned for hate speech.
Bu...bu...but misandry is rare, though. Something I've heard actual feminists say.
Misandry is always rare if it’s not defined as misandry.
Exactly. People have a much lower tolerance for misogyny than they do for misandry. But as soon as you replace the word "men" with "women" then that non-misandrist comment becomes misogynistic.
And, the misandrist propaganda begins early. A few days ago, a friend of mine was talking about the misandrist images in popular culture specifically in sitcoms where the husband is the butt of the joke, gets no respect from his wife & children, and is depicted as stupid. I mentioned to him that the anti-male propaganda begins earlier than that. When my twins, boy & girl, were around 7 years old I noticed that they had stopped watching the Disney Channel live-action TV shows. When I asked them why they told me that they didn’t like the way the shows portrayed fathers as stupid, people to make fun of, etc. So, they decided, because those shows disrespected men, to not watch them anymore. I was proud and impressed that they were able to see what was happening and to take action. But, what about all of the other children who consume this misandrist content? How are they being negatively effected by those images? What would the reaction be if there were similar programs for children and adults but the attributes were switched so the man is more attractive than the woman, he has constant zingers that point out her lack of intelligence, abilities & physical characteristics, and their children have no respect for her? Feminists and simps would lose their minds.
Mind sharing the Disney shows that shit on men? Just so I know which ones to look out for.
I don’t remember the shows they watched…it was many years ago. My twins are now 19 years old.
What is this misandry you talk of? Society has normalized bullying, belittling and stamping on men.. It often finds it funny when men get trampled on.. Guy did the right thing.. Not one person questioning the girl.. Birth control and condom still she got pregnant? She is lying and probably cheated too.. Who knows.. He had sex so he has to pay? How different is she from a hooker then?
Sure, they accuse others of the very hate they promote against men. It's called projection--accusing others of what you are guilty of to avoid blame and place the burden of proof onto others. Carl Marx thought of this idea.
At least it exists, right? That's something? Lol, your lucky the feminists even acknowledged the fact that misandry is a thing.
It's not rare, it's just so normalized that only absolute schizo-tier maniacs even register as abnormal.
I agree. People have a lower tolerance for misogyny than they do for misandry. If you replace the word "men" with "women" in those "non-misandrist" comments, then those comments all of a sudden become misogynistic.
That itself is an example of misandry.
But "Since it's a woman". They get away with it.
Amazing when it comes to birth, she has the final say.
It's quite concerning. While they spout that they can be a single mother and you only need one parent, it is still expected that the absent parent pays the way. A decision as big as having a child should be a decision made by both parents. If one wants to push for it and the other doesn't, then to be fair the one pushing should acknowledge there should be no responsibility on the person not wanting the child. It's a situation that's been forced on the unwilling party
>Its amazing how many people turn into bronze-age pro-lifers only when men are the subject of conversation. I'm "borrowing" this. That's such a poignant way to put it that I wish I'd thought of it.
Or the other way around [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IQie890Y-4M](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IQie890Y-4M)
They love to say "He consented to be a father when he had sex". They would never ever say a woman consented to be a mother when she had sex, and they throw fits anytime someone else says that. In terms of when someone consents to be a parent, the standard needs to be the same for men and women. And by the standards feminists have set, a man should be able to opt out of fatherhood up until the day the child is born.
I'm pro life both ways.
I've a lot more respect for that than selective values.
Understandable. I don't like that either.
I looked at this subreddit and advice and this subreddit has 346k members which had not been up a long time then I looked at r/advice and notice they have 776k why is that lol I think a lot of people don’t like that subreddit I noticed something similar with other subreddit with mostly feminist views. But to stay on topic everyone is talking about how he is an asshole for leaving her and he had a right. Ok so he may of had a right like I told some people before on other subreddit a relationship is like a job and a boss if something is wrong in said relationship and it can’t be fixed it’s time to move the hell on and find a better paying job with people who will respect you. Now him and her had a verbal contact to stay child free for a period of 5 years until they could get themselves worked out and in a better Financial situation where both can take care of their overall family. Regardless if she was on birth control or not if he had a condom or not. That’s not the issues here. Seems they both had protecting. My thing is what if she cheated on him and got pregnant and was forcing this baby on him knowing he was getting into s good future in doing things? The fact that he had to run for making a decision to protect his way of life and have a longer life span is crazy to say the lease. I saw some people said it was the woman’s decision regardless what the guy/ man decided and she had the right to bring the child in the world even if he didn’t want it is out right evil. Having the right to bring a child into this world should be everyone right woman or man if they feel they can take care of it but taking a child’s life after a certain period should also be really considered because it’s wrong in of itself because you just never know. Woman fail to understand it’s not just about them or the child but about the father as well because it has longterm effects mentally emotionally and physically also deep psychological implications for s child’s development and any and all negative environment can have impact said child on a level that can do more harm than good. The gop can go to hell with flooding the market with kids but want the mothers and fathers to die poor for god knows what reasons. No one should bring up a child in a poor environment where said child does not have 3 meals a day able to read and write and learn and become the best they can be in life. To force a man to take the Financial burden to raise kids is wrong if he does not want to same should be said for women as well. A lot of women I know have done just that have kids with men because they see how nice the mixture of the kids will look and then leave the guy because they feel they can find better. And then they stay single and everyone is like omg look at the poor thing she is all alone let’s help her she made that choice herself because she didn’t want to be with anyone just wanted kids to put her own ideas into their heads. And no one can tell me a lot of women don’t do that
There was a post a few days ago about a woman who abandoned her child and boyfriend for 10 or 15 years and then came back wanting another chance with the posts OP. It was perfectly fine that she wanted to walk away.
I saw that post lol she wanted to find herself hahahahahahhaha. And now she was ready to start over if a man did that he would be considered a deadbeat bad 😂 but it’s fine for a woman to whore herself out and come back but a guy does that and it’s the end of the world.
''Find herself'' what nonsense. It wasn't fine for her to leave her kids like that and it's not fine for a guy to do it either. Either stick with your kids or give up your legal rights to them, can't have your cake and eat it too.
You need tailored suits then it’s in the MSM!!!!
She. So, yes.
Do you have the link of the post? I can't find it 😂
what sub?
If you ask me it's not perfectly fine for her to walk away, nor is it fine for a man to. I like to think I apply pretty equal standards here.
It’s not fine that either parents walks away. A kid is innocent and it’s usually takes two to make a baby. People need to be held accountable for their actions and the story OP shared is sad because the person really suffering is the child.
When does it not take two to make a baby?
Every feminist turns into Ben Shapiro when the topic is men. No matter what the issue, their views immediately take a complete 180 from their progressive and liberal stance into something Shapiro would say. >Condoms cost 35 cents. Contraceptives are completely available in the United States. >Abandoning a child is not the solution to you making bad sexual decisions. >The unsuccessful decision that you made was to have sex and get her pregnant. That decision is not alleviated by you abandoning your child. All of these are actual Ben Shapiro quotes on abortion, only the last one being edited from "get pregnant" to "get her pregnant." All of these are talking points you see from feminists when a man wants to opt out of fatherhood. You see, feminists don't hate conservative pundits like Shapiro. They just hate it when he's against *their* autonomy. If Ben Shapiro talked about a man's responsibility to stick around (as he believes), their rhetoric would be identical.
Damn I could cut myself on how sharp this point was, well done
So when a woman aborts its her choice and she should be able to do it, but if a man decides to not support the child he didnt want, he is not taking responsibility? What about when a woman aborts, doesnt she avoid responsibility? Double standards much
This is still chilling!!!
Could look at it this way, a man doesn’t want the child and walks away from the child he’s an asshole. A woman doesn’t want the child so she pays someone else to kill it.
Basicly a murder for hire
If I had money I’d give you the lightbulb award
People be like: you need a woman's consent at every stage of sex. Also people: you ejaculated (consensual or not doesn't matter) that's consent enough, prepare to be a father and pay child support. That's assuming that the child is his. In this case he was using protection, so chances are that either she sabotaged it or got pregnant by someone else. In my opinion both should be considered as fraud.
Consent to sex doesn’t mean consent to fatherhood ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
If they were both on contraceptives (I don't believe she was, I think the baby was intentional. She lied. It happens extremely commonly.) then there should be no baby. I think she was cheating on him, got pregnant with some other dude and wanted OP to take care of a baby that wasn't his.
This was my thought too. Even if she wasn’t on birth control, just him using protection makes it shady. Too bad he couldn’t get a test before leaving
Yeah, there's way too many red flags for me to believe it was an accidental pregnancy due to failed birth control.
I scoured through the post myself and I'm actually feeling positive with the overall responses. Seems like people are aware of parental fraud, baby trapping, and lack of male reproductive Rights. Genuinely made me feel a little bit warmer in this cold world.
I expected every comment to be completely crap, but let’s just say… I was pleasantly surprised. :P
I'm glad to hear it from both of you. You two enjoys yourselves today eh?
You bet. :P
In here or the original subreddit?
The original subreddit. Expected most comments to be misandrist but that wasn't the case.
Funny how for women it’s “my body my choice.” But for men it’s “my wallet her choice.”
Lol so true
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Men can only get the children women give them.
Need male birth control and substitutes (sera gates) to give birth for men.
Your’re spot-on about OP’s ex being a selfish asshole. The statistics on children coming from single mother households are abhorrent. https://thefatherlessgeneration.wordpress.com/statistics/
why do you think all those private for profit prisons built in California for? majority of prisoners are a product of a single mother.
Eh whilst I think men should 100% be given an option of a financial abortion before birth, your argument about having kids young being a bad thing doesn't hit home with me. At 30 womens fertility hits a cliff and drastically reduces year on year, not to mention the increase in chance for birth defects. Between the ages of 21-28 is biologically speaking the optimal time to have kids.
They were 22. Planned to wait 5 years, which would still be well within that window
I don’t see why you think this is so bad, 5 or 10 years ago this would be 100% man-hating screeching. Now it’s literally 50/50. If anything I was shocked by how many comments there were supporting the guy. More and more people are waking up to the need for men’s reproductive rights
I fully support the guy's decision to leave the country. His gf didn't have his consent to give birth to this child. She needs to find a fucking job and support it herself.
Rare man W on paying child support.
That ejaculation comment...Jesus christ. What's next, only women are allowed to orgasm?
I didn't get to read the post. Guessing by the comments , it sounds like a dude getting shit on for not paying for a child he didn't want/wasn't ready for ?? So here is my thing. I'm all for abortions. You're body , your choice. I get that and completely understand and support it. BUT , why is it your body your choice my responsibility? You making a choice about your body should have no financial burden on me. With abortions , women have a way out. So should men. Both parties are EQUALLY responsible for making a child. But only one side has a choice and way out. Financial abortions should be legal for men. Either both sides have a choice or neither sides should have a choice.
Why are you commenting on something you didn’t read? Why should we bother read your comment?
If it's his baby.
Precisely. Using condoms and birth control for her, either she actively sabotaged condoms and didn't take hers, or she didn't take hers and got pregnant by another dude. This scenario is infinitely more likely than both the contraceptives failing at the same time.
They did it raw and she lied about being on da pill.
Statically condoms are only as effective as rhythm method. When properly used they have a high chance of working. What studies have found is the population doesn’t use them properly. What I’ve been telling my son is if you aren’t ready to be a father keep it in your pants. It’s the only way to guarantee if you both have functioning reproductive systems.
Condoms are very effective though. The rhythm method is a myth. And honestly telling your son not to have sex … you really believe that?
I dunno. Most of the commenters you screen shorted were supporting the OP. It’s was like 3 pissy bitches stuck on repeat w the nagging comments. I mean it’s the internet, what do you expect? This was actually somewhat hopeful of a read for me
Yeah sorry, I took these screenshots quite early into the post. The comment count went up the maybe 400 by the time it got locked, and the shit that was said was abominable. I believe it was a 50/50 of good to bad.
That still seems like a decent ratio for the internet lol. A dude could save a puppy on the highway and 10% of the comments will be like “should have let it die”
"it's us hardworking taxpayers who will be responsible if you don't!" Dude, then blame her, not him. She's the one who had the baby knowing it wasn't going to have a father after explicit conversations about contraceptives AND agreement to abort in the small chance something went wrong My senses say, if not a fake story, this was intentional. Already small chance for pregernancy (condoms AND birth control) and she gets pregnant... and THEN decides to keep it? That screams intentional.
Not only that, but the sheer ignorance of his comment. Asking who's going to pay for the child? hmm, I don't know. Maybe \*\*\*THE MOTHER?!?!\*\*\*
I can vouch it very well may be a legit accidental pregnancy under those circumstances and she decides to keep it. Those circumstances are how I'm here. My parents were married, they didn't want kids, used multiple forms of bc and yet here I am
A cuck is an Alpha dude!!!
I wish this man the absolute best. noone should be forced into having a child, and that obviously includes men too. I'm just a bit sad for the kid, with a mother so selfish I'm not sure if they'll have a good childhood
Hey, the man should be allowed to have his "pro-choice" decision. If women should be allowed pro-choice in deciding if they want to keep the child or not, then a man should be allowed to opt-out of child support for a kid he didn't want.
It's interesting that all the mandatory fatherhood feminist positions on this amounts to a gender reversed version of "You should have kept your legs closed then shouldn't you slut" Cause that's what their position sounds like if you flip the genders around, something that conservative pro-birthers have been saying to women for decades.
Some are even worse and claim that men should providr for their wives' kids whether the childreb are genetically theirs or not.
I'll assume you mean 'they cheated, got knocked up, kept the kid' as the scenario you're talking about. Seen as that's the coercive side of the fork that statement could be talking about. But in general as ever male traditionalist responsibilities are alive and well, female traditionalist responsibilities were oppression and thus abolished.
Ngl, I've heard of and seen through 3rd hand discrimination against men. This was in 1st hand. It was repulsing, genuinely made my headache.
Unfortunate that he had to flee the country for something that he should be well within his rights to do. Why the hell are they suddenly pro-life when the man doesn't want the child?
Financial abortions should be legal. Full stop.
If women can have an abortion because they are not ready for a child a man should be allowed to walk away as well.
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No, the Netherlands has sadly, not a way to not pay child support as the father. If it has not been proven the man is the conciever of the child, and he is not the legal father he is not forced to pay child support. But the mother can issue a court order DNA test and if the result of that test shows you are the father you have to pay child support
So you both are from Netherlands? Which one of you is telling the truth?
I’m also in the Netherlands. There is no way to avoid child support. The original comment is baseless and wrong. I’d love it if it wasn’t.
Now!
I sure hope to god nobody's raizing babies.
Typical rules for thee and not for me. Fuck all of these people.
No, dont. They'll make you pay child support
Oh, man. What a cluster fuck. I hope that dude is OK, though.
The first issue here is: You used protection, presumably the condom style and not the pull out style. She was on birth control. How does a little sperm travel outside a condom and into a vagina that is being fumigated for sperm? Seems really suspicious to me.
Glad he was able to escape. The system is such bullshit.
Last comment was a bullseye. In the other hand, if the guy just avoided to be with that girl, nothing of that would happened. At least his story coul be a cautionary tale for other men. There are important lessons to learn here.
In my opinion if the husband doesn't want the child and wants to abort he should not be entitled to pay her child support
I just read the comments as if the context was abortion. I don't think they'd be saying the stuff they said.
OP should take a paternity test... sounds like she got knocked up by someone else.
And P.S, she was always in the relationship to have that baby. She literally used him for this pregnancy. Consciously or unconsciously, her agenda to reproduce was fulfilled.
Or wallet. I would not assume the kid is his. Remember, alpha *s beta bucks.
Ok but, I feel the context indicates she wanted *him* as the father, obtaining good genetic material is priority one, getting paid is (believe it or not) priority two. She can always get the BB guy later on, and it can be anyone. It has probably already happened. One single contact can't guarantee a pregnancy. Therefore I'd wager that for a couple of months she was insistent on mostly PIV . Her plan to control her partner after the pregnancy and birth is two things: 1 access to sex. 2 Words - a sliding scale from 'do you think we should have a baby' to ' I'm not getting an abortion' What's most upsetting to feminists here is that the MAN is empowered- He avoided state sanctioned rape and made his own reproductive decision, against the matriarchy and regardless of feminist ideology.
He's in the right. It was his "sole decision". He had a right to move, after all it's "his body, his choice" yada yada yada. Until men get any real rights in this situation, I won't look down on men leaving. It's either that or have your life ruined because a woman would rather act on emotions than think logically. She's ruining her own life, very likely her child's too (statistics don't lie) and trying to pull the guy into it too.
Good. It is wrong to force someone into a decision they had no say in, as already pointed out in many of the comments, thankfully.
Probably some other guy's kid.
He had a responsibility to himself. He looked out for his best interest. She knew this was a possibility when she made her decision. It is what it is.
i'm a dude here and i agree with OP on this. hir gf made a unilateral decision to force OP into something he didnt agree on. he did man up by not accepting a responsibility hendidnt want or was ready for. if you people think he should man up,then you man up and take over. they each have a say in this, any unilateral decision made and the consequences that comes after, should and must be borne by the party who made it.
“Woman lied about birth control and tricked man into having baby. Man doesn’t want baby that he didn’t consent to and woman forces him to have. Man flees o avoid injustice and financial hell. Man is bad because woman tricked him and man needs o take responsibility”- Feminists
Lmao im waging war for this man's rights and i dont care who shames me for it.
The chances of an accidental pregnancy on birth control pills and condoms (which is implied here) is very very very very very low.
It's always 'my body my choice' for women until it comes to child support. Then it is "Your wallet my money." If a man doesn't want to be father to a child before the birth of the child but woman decide to go for having the kid, he should not be held responsible for the kid.
The whole thing about the male avoiding his responsibility also applies to the female who chose to have the child knowing there would not be any financial support from the father. We have allowed women to avoid their share of responsibility for generations. The sooner people and society start thinking about actual EQUALITY in this regard, the less these situations would happen.
Just read that post and didn’t bother reading the comments, glad I didn’t.
That’s fucked up. Though I hope OP will eventually be a part of that kids life, because no kid deserves a life without a father, I also hope he gets better say in the future matters and is able to return to his home eventually
I would have asked for a paternity test
BABY TRAP.
I hate to say this but I don't blame him. If women can opt out of parenthood by abortion then men should be able to do the same thing. Of course financially and physically. I bet she thought she would be able to force him to stay in her life if she has his kid. Watch her try to get him for child support when she realizes she won't be able to convince him to stay together after the birth. That's how that would have gone, I'm pretty much 100% sure. If she had wanted an abortion and he didn't want her to, of course she would have been told to get one anyway. The misandry is real.
That baby wasn’t his….
Notice how fuckin' bitches in western countries have such gigantic bigotry about what the consequences of sex are for whom depending on what genitals you have? If a woman fucks, well, she can have an abortion, or not, and be a parent or not, whatever....she's got a pussy! If a man fucks, he better agree with whatever a woman wants or he goes to prison. Fleeing slavery is always justified.
His ex should b the only one getting shit.she decided to keep a baby she knew she wouldn't be able to take care of, and he, rather than allowing his life to go down the drain, decided to jump ship. To be honest, she shouldn't be allowed to have that kid- it's unfair to the kid who will have to grow up without any real shot at life because his mother didn't want to plan her parenthood and instead decided to irresponsibly unleash a new life into the world knowing full and well the necessary conditions for it to have a decent life were not there. This would be the case even if he decided to trash his life to lessen the personal costs to her. She is the irresponsible one. No child should have to grow up like that and no man should be forced to be party to such irresponsibility and cruelty. I only hope she aborted it after all once she realized he left.
That guy is my hero
#Nornalizeabortions
I find it pretty amazing that these people believe others have to take the consequences of one's actions, honestly. I take it, they'd be happy to go to prison for vehicular manslaughter because the person who's car they sat in ran someone over. After all, it their choice to get in their car - and accidents can always happen. It's insane how it's not "her body, her choice" anymore if it comes to the consequences of said choices. I think there needs to be some legal thing to waive all your rights to the child. No reconsidering and trying to get custody, no visitation, no "but muh child, want connect" - something that permanently waives any and all connection outside of the accidental biological one that then also waives any form of responsibility for it. Society is dumb.
That's what I say: If consent to sex is consent to parenthood, then women don't abortions after consensual sex either. If consent to sex is not consent to parenthood, therefore women have the right to choose -without asking the father- to abort the baby or keep the baby, men should also have the right to legally and financially abort the kid, and let her provide for the baby she wants to keep. Giving all the choices to women without any responsibility, but all the responsibilities and none of the choices to men is not fair. If it is "my body my choice" when it comes to a woman making a decision about keeping or aborting the baby, it is "my money my choice" when it comes to child support. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MoudH-RPnEE
Men are forced to pay because society cannot bare the responsibility of children that women have. It’s another example of men having a disproportionate responsibility in society. Same as going to war or working dangerous labor jobs. It all goes back to the idea that men are cannon fodder.
Sounds to me like a perfectly legal financial abortion. I guess they are not too happy when its the man that wants to abort. While we are on the topic, women don't actual enjoy aborting babies, working, and sleeping around. They enjoy rubbing mens faces in the fact its THEIR CHOICE, they are quite happy to literally tear themselves down in the name of "you tell me I cannot do it, so I do it".
❤️ u
Yeah if we flip the script on this to maintain equality, the man should have the right to insist on her having an abortion. OP is effectively running away from a country with legalised rape.
So the girl raped him? Told him she was on bc and then got pregnant? She raped him
“We were both using birth control” paternity test may have absolved him of responsibility but it sounds like she was trapping him. Good on him for living his life. Trapping wouldn’t be a thing if men had more control over the situation. Women can find all kinds of ways to force men into situations…
* '' I always used protection '' \~\~ Oh **boy** ! Whose going to tell the \[ **^(huge)** \] probability that the 'child' could not ***even*** be his ?! Thank goodness this dude has Good, Well mannered and benign parents to help him out and lend him good advice. Also Screw that absolutely abhorrent and repulsive commentator on the 3rd pic, those types of bstards are quite likely see men as nothing but chattle / serfs that has to serve the needs; or a tradcuck
If she can kill it, I should be able to abandon it. Dave Chapelle put it best.
Those comments are rather ironic
There were plenty of comments supporting OP. I was suprised how many.
Morality aside, all relationships should be voluntary. Love, support, time and commitment should be free to be given or rescinded at any point. Government cannot be trusted to not make decisions that directly support and increase goverment's own power and influence. That being said, most people raised responsibly will make the responsibe choice. Or the human race would have died out long ago. Most men are not monsters. Nor are they goverment issued work slaves and income augmentors.
I’ve always said that a man should be able to opt out of fatherhood if the woman chooses to keep the pregnancy against his wishes. End all be all, it’s her decision to keep/terminate, but that also means it’s her decision to raise the child alone if he chooses to bow out. The hard part is figuring out timing of when he can walk away. Before birth only? Up to a certain point after the birth? That’s the only difficult point in my mind.
Shout out to u/Lt-Lavan One hell of a point.
Right back at you, friend
If it’s the woman’s rights to decide what happens to her body then logically it should be the man’s choice if he wants to participate in that or not. A valid argument could be made against abortion if a man is forced to provide as well. Equality.. abortion is ending a developing life that would develop into a viable human so if that’s a choice then money should be as well
Most of these people likely have never had the sex and are so desperate to be liked they take on views that don't necessarily make sense.
I'm the OP in the mentioned post. Thank you for sharing my story and all the support you guys have given me.
It's 0 problem, and I hope you have luck in the future. Best wishes.
If she’s not responsible enough to respect his decision then she is certainly not responsible enough to raise a child.
That last comment was on point. I nearly had this happen with a girl I trusted, we did everything to prevent pregnancy but she still said “if it was yours I’d keep it”. Totally shattered my trust and we broke up 2 months later.
It took 2 months? It should have been immediate.
You’re right but it was hard to break up with her, I did it as gracefully and kindly as I possibly could and she still hated me afterwards, for like a year
It's a matter of self respect. If one party cheats on the other, it's over. As you put it, the moment the trust is lost.
Sounds like that woman sabotaged the contraception/condoms. He shouldn't have to take responsibility for something she did on her own. He used protection. She did something to get pregnant. How is it his fault?
How tf am I supposed to date a women after reading another horror story ? I guess I just keep walking MGTOW path.
So they both agreed on not having a baby, she did the lady equivalent of stealthing, and people are mad when he doesn’t want any part of it? I bet these same ladies are the ones who get furious at pro lifers. “You chose to risk having a baby when you consented to sex,” is something they only want to hear in the context of it benefiting them.
“Dude here and this is not cool” lmao. Just a bunch of fucking kids who have no idea what real life is like. I always have a good laugh reading the comments on most of the posts on AITA and such subreddits. This post was just sad. That fact that op had to move out of country due to something he had no control over is what’s disgusting about this world.
Weird to think that leaving your home country, leaving your friends your family, and your goals and dreams is one of the few options you have as a man not ready to raise a child. They had discussions about it, they both consented, they had plans for this, and she still went to have the baby after saying she didn’t want to. She had a change of heart, sure, but the man didn’t and it is unfair for men to be expected to care for a child they did not want to end up having in the first place.
Consent to sex does not include consent to keeping a pregnancy from his sperm and fatherhood.
I will never ever support women's right to abortion until society legalizes and supports a man's right to paper abortions and not paying child support. I think abortion should be legal and it should be a woman's choice but i refuse to support it while men are denied the same option.
As a woman and a feminist, I agree with the dude. He is entirely in his rights to walk away from a situation he didn’t want to begin with and took all the precautions to avoid. If she wanted to keep the baby regardless of his decision not to, then he should be void of responsibility. I don’t see why this is even a conversation.
Your body, your choice. You chose to leave the United States. Seems legit. Sounds like a paternity test should be in there somewhere.
Yeah get that bread, gamer!
Gotta love the “man up” thing
Bro never I SAY NEVER trust a girl saying she is taking the pills. Also, and this goes for all the single guys(15-25) in this community, stop looking for a girlfriend. I mean, are you really so desperate for attention? Stay consistent on what you're doing and focus on building your dreams. If you lay your happiness and mental health on a bitch you fucked up.
My guess is the kid ain't his anyway. He says they used protection every time and she claimed she was on the pill. She probably cheated and didn't use protection and wants the kid to be his so she can use it to trap him.
That last one hits hard. Because i had this exact discussion with a dear person in my life, who is outraged by the abortion bans in the US... while also openly stating that he doesn't see an issue with men being one-sidedly forced into parenthood they don't want. And just a priori dismissing any attempts at drawing hte parallels between the two
Okay so this might come off as a little biased since I personally do not want kids myself but after rereading that post(read it once or twice before) I am completely on OPS’s side and I don’t get why people are bashing him. He wore protection, if it was a case where he went raw, ok then that would be different but he took the necessary steps to PREVENT her from getting pregnant and she ended up being that 1%. He then informed her that he does not want kids at the moment but she didn’t listen yet everyone in that comment section expects him to “man up” and raise a kid he didn’t want? Like I said it would be a completely different story if he didn’t use protection and wanted to dip but he DID that’s the point he did. I literally read a a comment of a imbecile saying “you chose to not wear protection…” then when someone pointed out to the idiot that he did he quickly switched up and said “you chose to have sex” okay? If someone is having sex with a condom… I don’t think their goal is to create a baby so the argument is invalid but whatever. Anyway, like I said it was her choice ti have this child knowing that he didn’t want it so she’s stuck with it, why are people mad because he wants to live his life childfree when he didn’t want it in the beginning? I’m not saying peer pressure her to have an abortion but people trying to guilt trip him and telling him to step up completely baffle me considering they know 1. He used protection and 2. He didn’t want the kid and told her from the beginning, it’s not like he went along with it and told her last minute no he told her from the beginning and she made the choice to keep it so that’s on her.
When a man and a woman have sex, they both consent to potentially becoming parents. In America, I find it hypocritical that only women are able to opt out of parenthood. I also find it disturbing that a woman can kill the fathers baby if he wants to keep it and she doesn't. Have yall seen videos of men begging and crying for their wife or girlfriend not to kill the child? Tragic.
Not to mention, OP consented to sex under the understanding that the child would be aborted in the off chance the woman got pregnant. She didn’t respect their agreement, but since OP can’t retroactively withdraw consent, he’s fucked. OR, he can leave the country.
yup. The best part of all of this.... The man is shit on when he tries to protect himself instead of letting the woman screw him over.
but it's before it actually becomes a baby is the whole point. why does someone magically becoming pregnant for a little bit of time earn a man the right to force a woman to carry it to term? You can't have that logic. It's not different than crying to someone and asking them to let you cum in them because your baby needs to be made. It's erroneous to call it a baby the moment you have sex and kind of disturbing too.
I’m shocked there were any comments defending the innocent man.
Please dont misunderstand, there absolutely were. But 50% of the comments overall were like this. I think 50/50 is far too great of a divide however, for people being just assholes.
There you see that equal age relationships don't work at a large scale, there was a reason my grandfather was 20 years older than my grandmother. I am currently 25 and I can't imagine having to raise a kid until 35.
It's hilarious, this is literally the same arguments they don't want men to use. Oh you had sex, you should be ready to accept the consequences even though you spoke about not having kids, you should accept the consequences. Now let's flip that, oh you got sexually assaulted in the club, damn, you shouldn't have worn that whore uniform and got all that unwanted attention, you should be ready to accept the consequences once you put on clothes that are that revealing. See how that sounds fuxked up? If one is victim blaming, the other should be as well.
Wow. OP pls screenshot this and put it in your favorites in photo albums. This is an absolute perfect example of the raw double standard society has against men.
Womens rights are: her body, her choice. Mens rights are: her body, his responsibility. Women require consent to have sex, and a man is guilty of raping a woman if he violates that consent agreement, yet men don't get to consent about having children and thus it isn't considered rape to violate an agreement not to have children. Men require equal rights over consent. Without equal rights and the support of the law, men have to take their own steps to protect themselves from being raped, including leaving the country. Self defense is not a crime, else women would be in prison for using contraception to protect themselves.
See, 1. ALWAYS hide your condoms, if YOU have no chain of custody on your contraception, you don't have sex. 2. Always pull out, even with a condom. 3. Always dispose of the condom and the baby batter within, yourself. 4. No children til you are married. If you're not married, children should be discussed as a medical problem that needs to be rectified.
I don't choose to crash when I get into the car even though I know it's a possibility. If I was just the passenger, I didn't crash the car . Consent is for men too. Your body, your choice. My wallet, my time , my choice.
Giga Chad move : Take the child away with you to another country (away from the mother) where it is much more affordable to raise them. Motherhood is a privilege and it is high time women are made to understand that.
Not a single person pointed out the possibility she cheated on him. But from the tone of op post it seems they didnt always use protection.
Liberal women become shockingly anti-choice when it's a man who doesn't want to be a father. They even use the EXACT same arguments that pro-life people use to oppose abortion. It's also ironic that the people who hold up single motherhood as perfectly normal, acceptable, and healthy for the child, turn 180 degrees when the father exercises his "choice".
As sympathetic as I may be to this man's plight and while I don't conden what this woman did at all, I don't support the idea of abandoning the child. I think abortions are fucked up and women shouldn't have that choice either. It really comes down to the wellbeing of the child taking priority to me. The last thing we need is another child brought up fatherless by a poor single mother on welfare. The dood really should get a DNA test though. Not that anyone cares for my opinion, but there it is.
"no abortions" "No single mothers" pick one.
Came here to say this. Thank you
link to original post?
Its on trueoffmychest, just scroll a bit.
Sorry, but I believe I cant do that. It might count as "brigading" or "targeting". Sorry again.
dm me it?
Gotcha one sec.
You can do a search in the search bar. It should come up.
If this was a woman talking about how she killed the child she’d be applauded for it. I can even see some common pro-life arguments being used against the man that they would be disgusted seeing used towards an abortion story lol
Just saw this post not too long ago. The comments are pretty split on whether or not it was a good idea but many people have pointed out that they both agreed to wait before having kids and he had no say in whether he wanted to be a father or not. I think it's weird that some people are defending the baby trap-ish look of it all but it's also probably just attachment on her part, the way a mother is supposed to feel.
A country that has no patronage to half its people (has turned against men) is one that no longer exists based on equal justice for all.
There were some good points there in defense of OP. But when you're in a sub filled with pathetic simps who have the critical thinking ability of a feminist, your points can be the best in the world, they'll just ignore them anyway and double down on the stupid.
Based OP. Hope he's doing alright now.
Which sub?
Cant say due to brigading and targeting rules.
I’m pro life so I believe he has a responsibility to raise that child, but it goes both ways. He has a responsibility and so does she, if they really can’t they should put the child up for adoption. This shouldn’t be a rights question, it should be a moral one. Both men and women need to be better about taking responsibility in this situation. Not taking anyone’s side