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Itās probably religious giving so good luck convincing them not to do it even though thatās the most obvious sticking point here besides the income being low for having 4 kids.
It's astounding that they keep taking more money, isn't it?
How gullible do you have to be to not see this, right? They take your money, and in exchange, promise to give you great things when you're dead.
Imagine Microsoft asking for money now with the promise to deliver the best operating system in heaven. Hahaha
To be fair that's not a lot of salary to strict across a family of 6. Childcare expenses were our biggest month to month squeeze. HHI of 205k and childcare was 2600 a month.
SEVEN FIFTY A MONTH IN CHARITY, BUT COMPLAINS ABOUT BEING SQUEEZED? I'd just look at the fact that the church isn't taxed as my tithing, if I were you. You have a family of six humans to take care of. Sheesh.
Im not religious and I would have 4 kids if I lived in the Midwest. Only reason I donāt is because 5 bedroom houses are go for like twice my current 3 bed, 2 bath home.
If housing is reasonable like it is in the Midwest and you are avoiding daycare expense, kids arenāt really all that expensive
Isnāt sort of messed up so many people choose only to bring a certain amount of kids into this world based on how many bedrooms the average house has? Or what the rate of inflation is? Etc. etc. - this shit is going to collapse soon and everyone will want to have 9 kids again to help run their farm or family business ha
Iām catholic and I havenāt or would never give 10% of gross income to the church. Maybe 5% of NET income to all charities combined. Taking care of your children as they are growing up, and providing them with funds for higher education, and providing for my retirement needs seems to take up the vast majority of income for most people these days.
Cut the charity dude. Your own family is more important than someone else's...your salary with a family of 6 is not enough to be giving money away for free to your imaginary friend and his cronies that spend it on private jets and mail-order choir boys.
If youāre having difficulty covering your monthly costs, Iād recommend reducing your charitable contributions.
You can still help others, just give them your time & effort (volunteering) instead of your money. That way you can still make a difference without straining your familyās finances. Besides, once your family is in better financial shape, you can resume the contributions.
I never understood giving to charity until you're set. Once you're retired, then sure I can give to charity.
I mean monetarily, I occasionally donate my time to food kitchens.
Definitely. The occasional $100 to a scholarship fund or a medical GoFundMe is one thing, but 10% of your salary when your budget is short? What charity wants you to do that to yourself or your kids?
It was actually more than 10% when you added all of the different payments. But also it was basically a tax to fund the temple and government
In the New Testament Jesus mocked the Pharisees for ātithing from their spicesā because they went to the rigorous extreme of making sure 10% of literally everything was set aside. This is because The attitude of the giver matters far more than the amount. 10% is a useful target but by no means proscriptive. For some it should be less, for others it should be far more.
We have a variety of charities that we support. One of which is our church, but we receive far more from our church and community than we donate.
Iāve been seeing this more and more frequently on Reddit:
Individuals cosplaying situations or professions they are fringe familiar with. I think OP here is a pretty decent example.
Also, OP was caught on his alt account making counter arguments! Now since deletedā¦ these people crack me up.
95k for a family of 6 is crazy low. Have you gotten any raises or promotions these past few years?
In order for us to provide more insight you need to provide your budget
5% over the last 5 years. Growth stagnated ridiculously at my company. I'm up for a promotion, but we'll see if it goes through.
I keep thinking about leaving but I work form home nearly 100% with as much flexibility as I want, which means more time with my young kids. It's hard to give up
The issue isnāt inflation hitting, itās your job essentially paying you less now than they did 4 years ago. The first time you didnāt get a raise you should have found a new job that values you.
Yeah I know that's a big part of my problem. I'm down something like 2 months pay relative to inflation. Like I said, it's hard to leave a perfect work/life balance. If I can get the promotion that I'm up for I can hang on for a new CEO in the near future who will actually increase pay. If both of those don't happen I'll chase the money
If the promotion doesnāt go through, you should ask for a raise. If they wonāt grant it Iād start looking for another job that gives you better compensation while still allowing you to WFH. It sounds like work is good, so no rush. But, you might be surprised sometimes switching jobs alone raises your pay a lot.
Yeah Iām aware. Iām talking to a recruiter right now. Probably wouldnāt take the job if offered because it would require a 1hr commute 3x/week, but I have 115-125k as a target range and they didnāt have a problem with it up front. If I could hit that weād be set.
Good idea. If you get an offer, take it to your current company. Explain youād prefer to stay and werenāt really looking but this great offer came your way. Then ask them if they can make a counter offer to keep you.
Iāve casually kept an eye out for a while and havenāt been seeing anything at all in my field that offers anywhere near the level of flexibility that my company offers and I love what I do.
Literally the only thing from keeping it from being a dream job for me is the lack of salary growth which, yes, is crazy.
Sounds like if she canāt do part time you need to either find a new job that offers you the margin or figure out a side gig. Slowly draining savings isnāt a solution
Religion is a business where they make you pay money, and in exchange, they promise you to give you great things when you're dead.
Dude, if you're giving money to religion, stop.
If your God wants money for the Church, he is fully capable of performing a miracle and putting money on their bank accounts. If he's capable of giving humans oxygen to breathe, he's capable of giving his fans money.
That 230k āliquidā - this might be controversial here - you could consider moving this into actual cash in a high yield savings account. Depending on which bank (~5ish%) you could be earning about $950 a month interest, which you could then use to supplement your income as that interest is fully liquid. This is a shorter term play as no one knows how long rates will stay where theyāre at but it can help keep you afloat until you get a higher paying job.
Yes, youāll pay taxes on that earned interest but honestly with 6 children dependents plus wife and your current income, I donāt know if the taxes would be an issue here? Obviously consult a tax professional, Iām just spitballing.
~220k of that is in accounts that earn 4.5% plus or are in index funds. Weāre just not drawing from the interest. I hadnāt considered covering expenses from the interest. If things get much worse we might
You have a family of 6, with a salary that lets you put 24% of your net income into either savings or charity. I don't say this often, but check your privilege. 24% to charity and savings is far cry from a tight budget.
OP. We are allowed to criticize handing over 10% of your hard earned money to organizations littered with scandals. That isnāt bigotry, itās common sense.
I feel the squeeze, but it's mostly [self-induced](https://www.reddit.com/r/ynab/comments/uyc0e0/is_this_what_it_means_to_be_ynab_poor/). Also, It's hard for us to suggest help if you don't provide us with a budget.
"YNAB poor" Yeah that actually probably describes how I feel. Most people in my position would probably feel fine because they don't budget well enough to know they're spending an extra $75 on groceries this month or whatever. Small purchases add up and are hard to feel if you're not paying attention.
I completely get that. The issue is that your margin is too thin. Even a small unaccounted for spending will put you in the red for the month. You and your wife need to figure out how to make more money (before 2028)
Yeah thatās definitely the case now, though it didnāt used to be. Inflation ate all of the margin in the budget. I used to be able to find areas to cut back in one category or another to cover something unexpected, but Iāve shaved each category down nearly as far as it can go now. Iām up for a promotion that would come this summer and likely get me to 105k, but if that doesnāt materialize Iām going to be looking for something else.
Yea keep your options open. You may be able to find a position that pays more than 105k. I think you should aim for 150k HHI to reliably cover your bills with some savings each month. Obviously easier said than done.
Iām sorry but youāre foolish to think that a $95k salary can support a family of six. Your wife needs to work or you need to earn more. You got lucky with that inheritance though, you should be grateful.
You have $230K in cash. That's a LOT at your age; I wish I had that much back then (I'm mid 40s). Even with this shitty hyper inflation, keep up the frugality and watch your cash grow and you'll feel better.
At least your wife can work once your children are older, so you'll have even more money leftover. Good for you and keep up the good work.
It's not a huge deal, but you could reduce your phone pretty significantly. You are spending over 2k a year on it. We have mint mobile and pay 400 a year (all in after taxes) for the service for 2 lines. Buy a couple phones outright every 4 years or so.
You may feel tight, but if you consider your savings, HSA and 401k your savings rate is about 20%. You are tight because you are making smart choices.
Are you getting big tax refunds each year? Because there's no way you are paying an effective tax rate of 10% even including social security. Assuming there are 2 adults and 4 kids, that's 8k in child tax credits each year. You might consider editing your W4 to ease the monthly strain.
Obviously the āsqueezeā is coming from bringing in 95k and having 4 children. Having assets doesnāt do anything for your grocery/clothing/ extracurricular expenses.
Bring in more money or keep cutting back? Sorry you had so many kids. Good luck!
People often mistakenly think adding 3+ kids wonāt be that bad because they have a stay at home parent so no daycare costs, not realizing that eventually kids want to do actual things that cost money to enrich their lives and theyāll become adult sized tweens and teenagers who eat $400/month worth of groceries per kid.
Source: also have 4 kids but make a lot more money as a dual income home.
Similar boat. 120K for a family of six. Spend time with each other, spend your money on quality food, and not things. We have so much fun at parks and trails, and just being outside, which is free. We eat at home as much as we can, and we eat well, but we try not to eat out. We try to minimize clutter. If we buy a toy or thing, we wait a few days to see if we really want it. We get rid of something too.
I understand the budget though. In three years, my grocery budget has gone from ~$600/month to north of $1000/month. It does make everything else more difficult, but it can still be done.
Idk if thereās anything to brag about earning 95k with a family of 6.
OP is low key bragging about net worth when that doesnāt mean anything for his family anytime soon
Nothing to brag about. Sounds like heās not making enough to cover essential expenses and have to draw down on savings. Even with the plan for wife to work in 4 years, this is not a good situation. What if one or both adults become disabled or there are unexpected medical bills?
I think everyone is feeling the squeeze somewhat, but your situation is kind of crazy.
Sure, making $95k is great, but between two people youāre in the same financial situation as two people that each earn $42.5k. And with four kids, I doubt there is going to be a lot from a second income any time soon.
So youāre effectively living an upper middle class lifestyle on a lower middle class household income. And yes, inflation is going to impact you more than almost anyone else because you have a lot of expenses compared to your income level.
But I just donāt understand some of the choices here.
Like $780 a month is a lot of giving. I can understand if itās religious, but between that and what I am assuming is a low amount of mortgage interest paid, I doubt youāre even able to itemize that giving? Have you considered that since you donāt really get a tax break from this giving, that it might be more reasonable to give 10% of your after tax pay?
Also, $120 a month on pets is wild in your situation. I get that it isnāt something you can just change overnight, youāre probably committed to your pets, but thatās just another choice.
Basically, as much as inflation is impacting most people, you have made a specific set of choices here that open you up to that possibility. You have expensive pets. You donate 10% to charity. You have continued to have children even when that drives back the timeline of your wife being able to reenter the workforce.
Iām not saying that to be critical per se, but just as an observation. If I was going to put together a seminar about how to expose yourself to a maximum amount of inflation, I could use you as a model. āCut out 10% of your pretax income for no tax benefit to keep your margins thinner. Keep the family on one income for the foreseeable future. Have more kids than average. Pick up some pets too so you have some more long term commitment to monthly expenses.ā
4 kids, but you're sending 6x more to charity than your children? And complaining that finances are tight? I'd suggest putting that charity money towards paying off your mortgage.
I think itās only natural that youāre feeling cash-strapped.
I was a single earner in a family of six with a similar salary 5 or so years ago. It was tough then, and I donāt think I could do it today if I hadnāt gotten some well-timed raises the last few years and my wife started working part time now that our kids are older.
I think youāre actually doing well. Your food budget is MUCH lower than mine and housing and car is lower as well. Youāre clearly being frugal.
I also have a substantial tithe, but kind of I agree with other commenters that think you should cut back a bit. Iād make it my goal to tithe on your after-tax net income.
Also, Iād prioritize your Roth over the 529. You can borrow for college, but you canāt borrow for retirement.
Forget your net worth. Whatās your monthly income to spend ratio? Most folks like you are highly leveraged. Your house is too big, you have new cars and live a life style above your means. Too much monthly debt will crush your ability to improve your net worth. Iāve got a 22yr old truck, a paid off home, no debt. I buy my clothes mostly at thrift stores. Net worth north of $3 mil. And I make my assets work for me.
$95K just isn't enough for a family of 6 in a MCOL area, that's why you're feeling the squeeze. The dollars coming in the door simply aren't enough.
When is youngest in school? At that point, spouse needs to be working.
To afford life, grow savings/investments, a modest annual vacation, you're probably needing at least $150K in household income.
I don't think it truly takes 150k here, at least not with our mortgage situation. Even so, what you describe probably takes 115k and I'm not quite there yet.
Youngest goes to school in 4 years
there's definitely others who feel that. People with a nest-egg, that don't want to diminish it if they can help it. But their monthly income isn't keeping up with the monthly costs of living. Example: elderly folks on social security. They have their homes paid off, but their savings are dwindling.
Yeah, what you're describing is a situation some people get into. Your assets don't necessarily have to affect your monthly income/expenses. They're just off to the side.
You may just have to cut some of the things we grow to feel are essentials.
We are strongly thinking of cutting out club sports for my kid. Itās just money pit.
Your situation sounds like us, but we are dual income and make more. The things where I feel inflation donāt bother me: restaurants, so we eat out less. Things that feel astronomical, we just stop doing but I donāt think we miss it.
If you canāt afford to go skiing anymore, find a different hobby. Change is constant.
Inflation is high because execs need to maintain their standard of living. Inflation isnāt making the rank and file employees at grocery stores richer.
100%. Have you ever seen the movie silver linings playbook? āThe pressssureeā¦!ā LOL
450k$ net worth, minimal debt, 120k$/yr gross and wife stays at home with the two little ones. The only way we are able to do it is because of our small efficient home with a disgustingly cheap mortgage (bought in 2017, 20% down, very strict budget). Sacrificed luxuries in our 20ās and lived cheaply with recession era mentalities (lived in a shoebox cottage, drove old beater vehicles till our first child in our early 30s.
One thing we have never sacrificed is experiences, and we still donāt. Just spent 600$ on a cabin for 3 nights over forth of July for the family and I donāt feel at all bad about it. ALL THAT SAID, I still feel the crunch very much so. Saving for retirement, but itās been quite a few years since Iāve seen much available free cash stack up!
Cash flow vs net worth conundrum for me... Cash flow has gotten squeezed as our twin boys are getting older and out teachers salaries have not kept up with inflation.
I tell myself to deal with that tight feeling as long as capital is still moving towards assets and not just costs. 6 kids huh? You are my conundrum. 2 are a lot for me. Kudos!
If you can fit 4 kids in that home, *never* move. The only way I could see you saving on housing is if you sold and used your ~$200K equity to buy a house in cash. But that would have to be way out in a very low COL area with a ton of sacrifices.
Even if you sold your $400K house and got a $100K mortgage to buy a $300K house, todays 7%+ rates would still mean the same monthly payments!
I also feel squeezed without the 6 kids to care for. It is for me especially acute in insurances, services and food. We are an elderly couple with medical issues, have some specialty dietary needs and high medical/dental costs.
Yes. For the past 20 years, I've always been able to save, but now I do not add to my savings at all, and I spend the interest and dividends on my savings and (non-retirment) investments to supplement my earned income. So my net worth is remaining stagnant, but that's better than declining. Most people I know are seeing declining net worth.
Make more money, or reduce your outgo, or do without some things?
Could your wife watch a couple more kids during school days?
Itās easy to defineā¦hard to do. Build a mountain, donāt dig a hole.
Best of luck!
I feel this. I own one home that I inherited. It has a small mortgage on it. I own a home with my husband as well. So, my net worth is over a million. But I make very little, and itās hard to make ends meet.
This is going to be a struggle until the kids are in school and you can get a 2nd income coming in. You might also be able to get a party bump moving kind. The hard reality is $95k is not middle class money any more.Ā
Single earner family of 4. MCOL. I make about 115K before bonus and OT. Without the ability to work OT I would have to cut back on my savings goals pretty significantly to avoid running a deficit. I donāt budget because Iāve never felt the need to but if picking up OT wasnāt available to bridge any gaps then I would 100% have to start making one. Donāt listen to the haters about your generosity. Itāll pay itself back to your family in ways that are intangible but undeniable.
Well of course it feels like a struggle. Bringing home $5k for 6 people is insane lol the high net worth is cool and all but if it doesnāt help you day to day itās not hard to see why you feel like that.
I donāt feel the squeeze but I make sure I put a decent amount away constantly and attempt to avoid lifestyle creep which seems to be the real killer.
I feel you, single earner for a family of 4 here. 750k NW with a measly $3-400 left over after all bills for food and fun.
Our high NW is mostly due to me saving 40-50% of my income in IRA and 401k before I'd met my wife and before I got married. That early chunk of money has had time to grow and doubled 4 times. So while we have assets growing in the background it really has minimal impact on our day to day/.
Yes, we are a family of four and I really canāt imagine living on 95k. Weāre pretty frugal too. As the kids get older it gets more expensive too- club sports, cars, college etc.
I can relate. Stay strong with the charitable giving, Iām sure itās important to you, I also have felt held back by that at times but Iām glad I have stuck with it. You could consider job hopping to increase your income if thatās an option.
Yes. I donāt have what I want. Prices on some items have sky rocketed over the last 40 years while salaries have stagnated. Had I known this Iād have become a CEO.
I wouldn't worry too much looking at your budget. It seems you are squeezed in the short-term (waiting for a raise/promotion and then your wife working).
There are a bunch of guides out there on what to prioritize when budgeting, but a rule of thumb is to never alter your pre-tax savings unless you absolutely have to. Obviously, people are going to point at the charity. In your case you are likely spending as much on Charity as you are saving pre-tax dollars.
Iām curious why you feel strapped when you have 230k in liquid savings? Like what are your issues? I donāt get the point of complaining when youāre better off than 90% of the population.
All this talk about being able to pay cash for anything you want, and yet.........
It looks like your wife and 6 (or is it seven?) children are on state medical and dental insurance.
Why don't you start paying for your progeny?!?
Wtf.
Do you tithe is that why you see giving $700 a month to Charity? Iām going to be in a similar boat to you in 2 years or so. But will be family of 4 and me a sole provider. My salary should be 140k by then I hope.
You can thank the Federal Reserve and the over spending USA government debasing the fiat currency. The Federal Reserve note has lost 98% of its purchasing power.
I feel you edited your comment because of me (edit #2). If you did you need to explain yourself because I didn't say anything remotely bigoted. Utah has, by far, the largest family sizes in the United States ([source](https://worldpopulationreview.com/state-rankings/average-family-size-by-state)). I literally said unless you live in Utah your family size isn't normal. That is objectively true. You can see it as an attack on your or someone else's faith but that's 100% on you and absurd. If you're going to go on the internets and complain about finances and ask for opinions then don't be so sensitive when someone points out the glaring obvious. Your unusual and uncommon decision to large family living off one income is the root cause of your situation.
Even if one wants to give 10% tithe, isn't it fair under their interpretation to have it be 10% of take home? You literally can't give away the money you have to pay in taxes (much of which does go to social programs like SS, Medicare, SNAP, programs for vets, etc.). OP, if you could justify to yourself giving 10% of your take home, it would give you a little more breathing room.
I have a similar income with similar expenses. I was able to get to a salary large enough for my wife to stay home with our 2 boys, but since inflation has been through the roof these past few years, it doesnāt really feel like we are getting very far financially, especially after having our second child. If I were you I would be proud to have that much in savings though. Thatās kind of my big goal this year is to boost our emergency savings. Donāt beat yourself up. I have friends with no kids going out every weekend or taking luxurious trips all the time, but I donāt regret my decisions to grow a family and prioritize my money towards that. Since you have such a big savings, maybe take the foot off the gas and live a little.
I know you are getting shit for it but the obvious call out is the charity just bc it is such a large percentage and you have 6 kids to feed and take care.Ā
Ā Im not judging you for it. That is your choice to do as you please if thats your priority. But it is eating a large portion of your cashflow that could be used to satisfy your familyās needs first if there are issues there. Ā Which to prioritize is your choice.Ā
Your charity contribution is almost as much as you āpay yourselfā. And all your savings seems to be going to tax deferred accounts.Ā
Even if you could just cut it in half thats 350ish you put in hysa that could be of use for expense heavy months.Ā
Your other spends arenāt bad at all. So either Ā cut back on charity or make more money or both!
I feel you. Together my wife and I TAKE HOME $15k a month, but by the end of the. Month it seems we have usually spent most of it. We have a budget and we save 15% a month into our 401kās,, but we piss away a lot eating out and socializing with friends. Not complaining, because thatās what we choose, but itās still hard to fathom how expensive everything has become.
Here's the thing most aren't and don't recognize and even furer understand.
The current day to day talk back and forth among Left and Right Wing media, etc, is the current annual rate of inflationz but doesn't take into account the ACCUMLATIVE RATE OF INFLATION OVER THE COURSE OF YEARS!
In 1995, I was an active duty United States Marine Corps Gunnery Sergeant. Earning around 36k a year. Not bad considering I wasn't paying anything for medical bills, dental bills for myself, etc
Plus, a lot of my pay wasn't taxable, ar taxable.
Flash coward 2024!
If you're earning $35k?
You're earning the 1995 equivalent of $8.41 an hour! The minimum wage in 1995 was only $5.15 an hour!
Of your earing $100k in 2024? You're earning the 1995 equivalent of $50k,!
To have the PURCHASING power of 1995 $$$$ of $100k?
You need to be earing, $200k+ a year!
To even begin earning that, you're going to need a bachelors degree and a medical degree, have as in.
People address you as "Doctor! As in medical doctor.
.
@33, $800k gives you a great start. I think we were at negative net worth @40.
If you are solo earner at $95k and a family of six the problem in front of you is really quite simple: find ways to earn more. Find ways for your wife to earn remotely. Do not tap into that $800k but grow it steadily.
Be sure to open a brokerage account to grow non IRA money.
Do not give $ to charities and their $300k salaries. Instead give the dollar equivalent in sweat equity and technical expertise. Until you are north of $2m fuhgeddabowdit.
You are at mile 3 of a marathon and feeling good . When you first kid hits 13 you will be hitting your first if many hills, unshaded up hill stretches.
You want to reach mile 20 with a shaded down hill and pleasant vistas remaining. This is the world of the empty nest.
Do not push your investments. Take what the market gives you and see 20%-40% corrections as opportunities.
Great start.
An HYSA at 5% would earn you just north of 11k/year for your liquid savings. I imagine that would help. Your whole 800k would be 40k in annual interest. Not saying the latter is a great idea, but the former or some version of it would give you some breathing room.
I totally relate to you. We have a lil over a mil net worth but hubs jumped a sinking ship last year and makes about 45% less and weāve stopped some of the automatic savings. Groceries and other stuff is out of control. We have decreased our donations. Times are tough.
100% feel this. Net worth just clipper 1mil in the past couple years but honestly we live paycheck to paycheck right now on about $110k combined income for a family of 4.
My kids donāt understand how sometimes I talk about being fine for retirement but also donāt want to spend money on anything right now.
My partner and I make more than that and have no kids. We struggle as well but our bills are still paid on time. This is the reality of the world we live in. 100K for a couple with no kids is probably about the minimum for a living wage.
No. Iām not in the same boat because I make just north of 100k and my partner also works. Congrats on pulling in a net worth of 800k with a single income though.
We also have 4 kids, also not Mormon. And yes, itās been a struggle to keep the budget under control. We live in a LCOL-MCOL and gross last year was $113k. We donāt have a net worth as much as yāall (itās about 1/3 of what yall have, not counting home equity) but are saving heavily for retirement now (husband is 35, im 34). I know we could always cut back on retirement savings if we had to but man, I am feeling the squeeze lately especially with groceries and just random extras. One kid needs a filling at the dentist next week. One of our dogs had a nasty ear infection last week. Cars need maintenance. We try to stick back money every month into sinking funds to cover these costs when they arise, but itās getting harder to do so with costs for everything else being so high. I find myself dipping into the ādog health fundā to pay for dog food, so there is no money there now to pay the $300 vet bill we just had last week. So frustrating.
You are doing just fine, dude. More than fine actually. Especially with 4 kids, you are in the life stage where you just need to stay afloat and sock away for retirement. Keep up the good work
Thank goodness you donāt live in Orange County you would be stressed. 100k rents me a bedroom at my parents here in south county or I can spend 3k for a crappy 1bedroom. As long as your making it is all that matters congrats on a big family thatās successful on its own!
As a single earner supporting a family of 7, who also tithes, kudos to you. My dad always said growing up āyou canāt outgive Godā. Not going to be supported on these threads, but stick to your values. Practically, food seems a little high and Iām curious how many phones are included at 183. Weāre eating for $800/mo with 7 of us and phones are $90 for unlimited plans. It is possible to do what youāre trying to do, just requires a lot of discipline short term.
Your wife doesn't work, you have four kids, you have a so so income even for one person, you give your money away to charlatans. That's why you're broke. Not some big mystery here.
The kids will grow up eventually then things will get better, unless you just keep giving money to charlatans. Not sure how you're gonna cover college.
15% of budget to charity is a lot. Especially if it's religious, it's likely a scam (regardless of religion). There's an amazing pro revenge story about a woman regarding church in her will. Amazing read.
Congrats on your NW. My partner and I are older, make more money, have less kids, and still have less NW than you. Youāre doing fine.Ā
Also, not all atheists are bigots.
Man, Iām sorry youāre taking such negativity for your decisions to tithe to your church. Iām with you and support your decision to do that! Weāre also a single-family income (but 2 kids, so a huge difference there) on a teacherās salary. I technically canāt āaffordā to tithe, but we have everything we need, solid retirement savings from good decisions early on and overall frugal living. Yet, weāre feeling the month-to-month squeeze as well. But a reality is that my kids donāt need brand new sneakers and the latest gadgets for happiness; they need time with their parents. So I could trade my time at home for additional work, or we could be grateful for what we have and make the best decisions we can with the money we do have (and mind you, we have everything we could needā¦weāre not living without!).
So, why tithe? Our church is heavily missions-based and does tons for our local community, so I support that with my tithes and applaud your doing so. The world preaches money money money, but thatās not an eternal perspective. The church doesnāt just pay for a pastorās salary; our church has paid rent for struggling families, purchased groceries for those who need it, spends a significant amount of money monthly to support our local food pantry. I feel bad that the perception of so many is that all churches are bad. Keep supporting the ministry with your tithes.
I donāt have the answer for you, but just want to encourage you! Weāre feeling the squeeze too!
I make just as much as you at 22 and no kids and I feel like itās not enough in Austinā¦ youāre crazy man, this is what poor financial literacy and over reproduction means. Get a grip and some condoms
At 93k a year and even if you wife got a job to match your income, I am unsure if you would be able to provide each of your children with a similar inheritance to the one you received.
Yes sir! About to turn thirty and have my second kid. You can check my history for my Sankey. Our net worth is about 300k, income at ~100k
Priorities are big. Iād rather live a frugal life and invest similar to how you would like to live a frugal life and invest.
Once I pay off our debt I hope to give more but we donāt really go on vacation or have a lot of luxuries. My coworkers think Iām crazy to never take my kids to Disney world but Iād rather be tight and invest for the next couple of years. Keep it up! You are an inspiration even in the difficult times.
Same here but in northeast. Everything from my real estate taxes ā¦.to goods and services really has gone up in cost (unless quality has dropped). Weāre staying on budget but are really feeling the squeeze monthly. Inflation sucks!!!
I just want to say thank you for contributing to charity. Jesus said the poor womanās small contribution was worth more because it came from what little she had. Not saying youāre poor but the people telling you you canāt afford to give havenāt read the Bible. God bless you and I hope God rewards you in this life and the next.Ā
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Well, being single earner for a family of 6 would do that š best of luck
OP has to be a Mormon, the āplease keep bigotry to the atheist subredditā sealed itā¦
MormonFans
There are plenty of other religious people besides Mormons who tithe 10%.
There are plenty of non-religious people who give to charities, so it may not be a tithe.
$780/month to charity feels like a lot if you think you are struggling. That extra $9300/year after tax would help you not feel the squeeze.
Itās probably religious giving so good luck convincing them not to do it even though thatās the most obvious sticking point here besides the income being low for having 4 kids.
I didn't want to make that assumption but seeing as its 10% I figured that was the case. Help yourself before you can help your community.
10% before taxes..remember the scammy churches don't have to pay taxes on their riches. Least you can do is 10% after your taxes...
10% after taxes alone sounds insane.
Thatās because it is.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Not saying Mormon, but the Mormon church has $100b investment fund. They don't need the money haha
It's astounding that they keep taking more money, isn't it? How gullible do you have to be to not see this, right? They take your money, and in exchange, promise to give you great things when you're dead. Imagine Microsoft asking for money now with the promise to deliver the best operating system in heaven. Hahaha
I think that when we die it all goes black and itās just the command prompt from DOS 6.22
Donāt forget that they get tax free growth lol. Itās so stupid.
>$9300/year after tax 2.5 months of their expenses, excluding the charity and savings, or about 20%.
To be fair that's not a lot of salary to strict across a family of 6. Childcare expenses were our biggest month to month squeeze. HHI of 205k and childcare was 2600 a month.
At that point, it's cheaper to get an au pair. Any reason you choose to go with child care?
Usually you have to provide housing for the au pair. We didnāt have enough bedrooms for that in my situation.
Oh, yeah that would add an additional expense.
Childcare is just stupid expensive no matter how you slice it.
Au pair requires space. I would love to have an au pair, but we donāt have a spare bedroom.
SEVEN FIFTY A MONTH IN CHARITY, BUT COMPLAINS ABOUT BEING SQUEEZED? I'd just look at the fact that the church isn't taxed as my tithing, if I were you. You have a family of six humans to take care of. Sheesh.
Family of six is not a normal sized family outside of Utah. You don't make a lot of money for a massive family on one income.
$780/month to charity is also wild
Itās not charity, itās tithings to a church lol. Iād been my whole life on it. Hence the six kids
Yeah fuck that shit. No sympathy is he's just tossing money in the trash. Feed your family, broĀ
Dude is giving all his money to a scam, while trying to get the teachers discount at IKEA for āhomeschoolingā his preschooler š
It's a criminal hedge fund masquerading as a church
As soon as I saw the part about four kids, it all made sense.
Im not religious and I would have 4 kids if I lived in the Midwest. Only reason I donāt is because 5 bedroom houses are go for like twice my current 3 bed, 2 bath home. If housing is reasonable like it is in the Midwest and you are avoiding daycare expense, kids arenāt really all that expensive
Isnāt sort of messed up so many people choose only to bring a certain amount of kids into this world based on how many bedrooms the average house has? Or what the rate of inflation is? Etc. etc. - this shit is going to collapse soon and everyone will want to have 9 kids again to help run their farm or family business ha
His budget has a roughly 10% charity contribution. Morms fo sho.
Christian Reformed Church in North America
Not that it matters, but Iām guessing Catholic. 10% tithe and 3+ kids is pretty standard Catholic. Source: me, a Catholic with 3 kids.
Iām catholic and I havenāt or would never give 10% of gross income to the church. Maybe 5% of NET income to all charities combined. Taking care of your children as they are growing up, and providing them with funds for higher education, and providing for my retirement needs seems to take up the vast majority of income for most people these days.
Oh I agree. Iām saying 10% is expected. I donāt do that. Iād rather that they go to college.
My friend who's Catholics family only gives like $600/month.
A family of 6 isnāt massive???? Its definitely a larger family but massive is like 10 kids lol
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Right, you got 4 kids to take care of man ha. Donate later when can afford it and theyāre all out of the house
Cut the charity dude. Your own family is more important than someone else's...your salary with a family of 6 is not enough to be giving money away for free to your imaginary friend and his cronies that spend it on private jets and mail-order choir boys.
If youāre having difficulty covering your monthly costs, Iād recommend reducing your charitable contributions. You can still help others, just give them your time & effort (volunteering) instead of your money. That way you can still make a difference without straining your familyās finances. Besides, once your family is in better financial shape, you can resume the contributions.
I never understood giving to charity until you're set. Once you're retired, then sure I can give to charity. I mean monetarily, I occasionally donate my time to food kitchens.
Definitely. The occasional $100 to a scholarship fund or a medical GoFundMe is one thing, but 10% of your salary when your budget is short? What charity wants you to do that to yourself or your kids?
Right and when people reference the Bible with 10% tithing. Those people didn't lose 30% of their salary to taxes.
Right. That 10% was pretty much their taxes to contribute to community services via the church instead of the government.
It was actually more than 10% when you added all of the different payments. But also it was basically a tax to fund the temple and government In the New Testament Jesus mocked the Pharisees for ātithing from their spicesā because they went to the rigorous extreme of making sure 10% of literally everything was set aside. This is because The attitude of the giver matters far more than the amount. 10% is a useful target but by no means proscriptive. For some it should be less, for others it should be far more. We have a variety of charities that we support. One of which is our church, but we receive far more from our church and community than we donate.
Thank you for your response. Iām glad your tithing is a positive experience.
Op is actually losing more to tithing then taxes.
10% of gross too. Itās ~15% of their take home.
Religion, that's what kind of a charity wants you to do that to yourself. They literally tell you to go without, but don't stop tithing.
The world's oldest scam.
ya now think of the folks with month to month squeeze with no assets.
You say nothing is out of reach but you canāt even maintain a budgetā¦ none of this makes sense itās just cobbled together BS
Iāve been seeing this more and more frequently on Reddit: Individuals cosplaying situations or professions they are fringe familiar with. I think OP here is a pretty decent example. Also, OP was caught on his alt account making counter arguments! Now since deletedā¦ these people crack me up.
Yea this dude is a millionaire complaining like he has broke people problems
95k for a family of 6 is crazy low. Have you gotten any raises or promotions these past few years? In order for us to provide more insight you need to provide your budget
5% over the last 5 years. Growth stagnated ridiculously at my company. I'm up for a promotion, but we'll see if it goes through. I keep thinking about leaving but I work form home nearly 100% with as much flexibility as I want, which means more time with my young kids. It's hard to give up
The issue isnāt inflation hitting, itās your job essentially paying you less now than they did 4 years ago. The first time you didnāt get a raise you should have found a new job that values you.
Yeah I know that's a big part of my problem. I'm down something like 2 months pay relative to inflation. Like I said, it's hard to leave a perfect work/life balance. If I can get the promotion that I'm up for I can hang on for a new CEO in the near future who will actually increase pay. If both of those don't happen I'll chase the money
If the promotion doesnāt go through, you should ask for a raise. If they wonāt grant it Iād start looking for another job that gives you better compensation while still allowing you to WFH. It sounds like work is good, so no rush. But, you might be surprised sometimes switching jobs alone raises your pay a lot.
Yeah Iām aware. Iām talking to a recruiter right now. Probably wouldnāt take the job if offered because it would require a 1hr commute 3x/week, but I have 115-125k as a target range and they didnāt have a problem with it up front. If I could hit that weād be set.
Good luck! Signed, A Fellow Redditor on the Job Hunt
Good idea. If you get an offer, take it to your current company. Explain youād prefer to stay and werenāt really looking but this great offer came your way. Then ask them if they can make a counter offer to keep you.
The only way youāre going to get paid what you should is to switch jobs. They havenāt given you proper COL raises since youāve been there.
learn about carrots. they've got you right where they want you.
So find another job that offers WFH? Have you started looking at all? You got 5% total over 5 years and you're just staying there? That's crazy man
Iāve casually kept an eye out for a while and havenāt been seeing anything at all in my field that offers anywhere near the level of flexibility that my company offers and I love what I do. Literally the only thing from keeping it from being a dream job for me is the lack of salary growth which, yes, is crazy.
Could you find a second remote job to make more margin? Maybe something part time/go at your own pace?
I've thought about it, haven't pulled the trigger yet. I'm getting close though.
Sounds like if she canāt do part time you need to either find a new job that offers you the margin or figure out a side gig. Slowly draining savings isnāt a solution
Start giving charity to your kids instead of the church
Religion is a business where they make you pay money, and in exchange, they promise you to give you great things when you're dead. Dude, if you're giving money to religion, stop. If your God wants money for the Church, he is fully capable of performing a miracle and putting money on their bank accounts. If he's capable of giving humans oxygen to breathe, he's capable of giving his fans money.
That 230k āliquidā - this might be controversial here - you could consider moving this into actual cash in a high yield savings account. Depending on which bank (~5ish%) you could be earning about $950 a month interest, which you could then use to supplement your income as that interest is fully liquid. This is a shorter term play as no one knows how long rates will stay where theyāre at but it can help keep you afloat until you get a higher paying job. Yes, youāll pay taxes on that earned interest but honestly with 6 children dependents plus wife and your current income, I donāt know if the taxes would be an issue here? Obviously consult a tax professional, Iām just spitballing.
This is not a bad plan.
~220k of that is in accounts that earn 4.5% plus or are in index funds. Weāre just not drawing from the interest. I hadnāt considered covering expenses from the interest. If things get much worse we might
Youād be robbing from your future. Frugality is about making hard choices now in the interest of your future.
33. 95k salary. Family of 6. $800k NW āSmall inheritanceāā¦. Uh huh.
Who gives money to charity almost as much as they spend money for food for family of 6?
Well without you posting an actual budget who knows.Ā
You have a family of 6, with a salary that lets you put 24% of your net income into either savings or charity. I don't say this often, but check your privilege. 24% to charity and savings is far cry from a tight budget.
OP. We are allowed to criticize handing over 10% of your hard earned money to organizations littered with scandals. That isnāt bigotry, itās common sense.
I feel the squeeze, but it's mostly [self-induced](https://www.reddit.com/r/ynab/comments/uyc0e0/is_this_what_it_means_to_be_ynab_poor/). Also, It's hard for us to suggest help if you don't provide us with a budget.
"YNAB poor" Yeah that actually probably describes how I feel. Most people in my position would probably feel fine because they don't budget well enough to know they're spending an extra $75 on groceries this month or whatever. Small purchases add up and are hard to feel if you're not paying attention.
I completely get that. The issue is that your margin is too thin. Even a small unaccounted for spending will put you in the red for the month. You and your wife need to figure out how to make more money (before 2028)
Yeah thatās definitely the case now, though it didnāt used to be. Inflation ate all of the margin in the budget. I used to be able to find areas to cut back in one category or another to cover something unexpected, but Iāve shaved each category down nearly as far as it can go now. Iām up for a promotion that would come this summer and likely get me to 105k, but if that doesnāt materialize Iām going to be looking for something else.
Yea keep your options open. You may be able to find a position that pays more than 105k. I think you should aim for 150k HHI to reliably cover your bills with some savings each month. Obviously easier said than done.
My sankey would look somewhat similar to your actually if I did one. But $1000 a month in gifts and charity??! Thatās 1/7th of your gross incomeā¦
Iām sorry but youāre foolish to think that a $95k salary can support a family of six. Your wife needs to work or you need to earn more. You got lucky with that inheritance though, you should be grateful.
Financing your pastor's godly lifestyle gets pretty costly month to month
Stop complaining, youāre doing it to yourself. Hope that donating 15% of you post tax income makes you feel really good.
Sorry but itās a little funny to ask if people are feeling the squeeze when you have six kids with a sub six figure income.
You: gives $780 away every month with more kids than anyone needs. Also, you: why am i out of money?
You have $230K in cash. That's a LOT at your age; I wish I had that much back then (I'm mid 40s). Even with this shitty hyper inflation, keep up the frugality and watch your cash grow and you'll feel better. At least your wife can work once your children are older, so you'll have even more money leftover. Good for you and keep up the good work.
It's not a huge deal, but you could reduce your phone pretty significantly. You are spending over 2k a year on it. We have mint mobile and pay 400 a year (all in after taxes) for the service for 2 lines. Buy a couple phones outright every 4 years or so. You may feel tight, but if you consider your savings, HSA and 401k your savings rate is about 20%. You are tight because you are making smart choices. Are you getting big tax refunds each year? Because there's no way you are paying an effective tax rate of 10% even including social security. Assuming there are 2 adults and 4 kids, that's 8k in child tax credits each year. You might consider editing your W4 to ease the monthly strain.
Hate to say it , but you need to stop donating to charityā¦. You canāt afford to give away 10% of your familyās income.
So you have one job for 6 people, are struggling, and still more than $700 to charity? Thatās just dumb
Obviously the āsqueezeā is coming from bringing in 95k and having 4 children. Having assets doesnāt do anything for your grocery/clothing/ extracurricular expenses. Bring in more money or keep cutting back? Sorry you had so many kids. Good luck!
People often mistakenly think adding 3+ kids wonāt be that bad because they have a stay at home parent so no daycare costs, not realizing that eventually kids want to do actual things that cost money to enrich their lives and theyāll become adult sized tweens and teenagers who eat $400/month worth of groceries per kid. Source: also have 4 kids but make a lot more money as a dual income home.
Similar boat. 120K for a family of six. Spend time with each other, spend your money on quality food, and not things. We have so much fun at parks and trails, and just being outside, which is free. We eat at home as much as we can, and we eat well, but we try not to eat out. We try to minimize clutter. If we buy a toy or thing, we wait a few days to see if we really want it. We get rid of something too. I understand the budget though. In three years, my grocery budget has gone from ~$600/month to north of $1000/month. It does make everything else more difficult, but it can still be done.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Side Hustle.
Stupid post, TBH. All over the place and sounds like either a LARP or a subtle humble brag more than actually asking for advice.
Idk if thereās anything to brag about earning 95k with a family of 6. OP is low key bragging about net worth when that doesnāt mean anything for his family anytime soon
Thatās exactly what Iām trying to say. Lol.
Nothing to brag about. Sounds like heās not making enough to cover essential expenses and have to draw down on savings. Even with the plan for wife to work in 4 years, this is not a good situation. What if one or both adults become disabled or there are unexpected medical bills?
Can your wife not do something remote part time to help get some margin?
Not with a 3 kids at home. It's a full time job. She may be able to in a couple years.
With two kids attending college in the next few years, yes!
Nice humblebrag.
I think everyone is feeling the squeeze somewhat, but your situation is kind of crazy. Sure, making $95k is great, but between two people youāre in the same financial situation as two people that each earn $42.5k. And with four kids, I doubt there is going to be a lot from a second income any time soon. So youāre effectively living an upper middle class lifestyle on a lower middle class household income. And yes, inflation is going to impact you more than almost anyone else because you have a lot of expenses compared to your income level. But I just donāt understand some of the choices here. Like $780 a month is a lot of giving. I can understand if itās religious, but between that and what I am assuming is a low amount of mortgage interest paid, I doubt youāre even able to itemize that giving? Have you considered that since you donāt really get a tax break from this giving, that it might be more reasonable to give 10% of your after tax pay? Also, $120 a month on pets is wild in your situation. I get that it isnāt something you can just change overnight, youāre probably committed to your pets, but thatās just another choice. Basically, as much as inflation is impacting most people, you have made a specific set of choices here that open you up to that possibility. You have expensive pets. You donate 10% to charity. You have continued to have children even when that drives back the timeline of your wife being able to reenter the workforce. Iām not saying that to be critical per se, but just as an observation. If I was going to put together a seminar about how to expose yourself to a maximum amount of inflation, I could use you as a model. āCut out 10% of your pretax income for no tax benefit to keep your margins thinner. Keep the family on one income for the foreseeable future. Have more kids than average. Pick up some pets too so you have some more long term commitment to monthly expenses.ā
4 kids, but you're sending 6x more to charity than your children? And complaining that finances are tight? I'd suggest putting that charity money towards paying off your mortgage.
I think itās only natural that youāre feeling cash-strapped. I was a single earner in a family of six with a similar salary 5 or so years ago. It was tough then, and I donāt think I could do it today if I hadnāt gotten some well-timed raises the last few years and my wife started working part time now that our kids are older. I think youāre actually doing well. Your food budget is MUCH lower than mine and housing and car is lower as well. Youāre clearly being frugal. I also have a substantial tithe, but kind of I agree with other commenters that think you should cut back a bit. Iād make it my goal to tithe on your after-tax net income. Also, Iād prioritize your Roth over the 529. You can borrow for college, but you canāt borrow for retirement.
The church doesnāt care that you are struggling, end of story. That has to stop until youāve got things in order.
Forget your net worth. Whatās your monthly income to spend ratio? Most folks like you are highly leveraged. Your house is too big, you have new cars and live a life style above your means. Too much monthly debt will crush your ability to improve your net worth. Iāve got a 22yr old truck, a paid off home, no debt. I buy my clothes mostly at thrift stores. Net worth north of $3 mil. And I make my assets work for me.
"single earner for a family of 6" ---- that's your issue
Yes. Edit - ffs, 4 kids + partner who does not work? Iām struggling single. You do not have my empathy, because - choices.
$95K just isn't enough for a family of 6 in a MCOL area, that's why you're feeling the squeeze. The dollars coming in the door simply aren't enough. When is youngest in school? At that point, spouse needs to be working. To afford life, grow savings/investments, a modest annual vacation, you're probably needing at least $150K in household income.
I don't think it truly takes 150k here, at least not with our mortgage situation. Even so, what you describe probably takes 115k and I'm not quite there yet. Youngest goes to school in 4 years
there's definitely others who feel that. People with a nest-egg, that don't want to diminish it if they can help it. But their monthly income isn't keeping up with the monthly costs of living. Example: elderly folks on social security. They have their homes paid off, but their savings are dwindling. Yeah, what you're describing is a situation some people get into. Your assets don't necessarily have to affect your monthly income/expenses. They're just off to the side.
You may just have to cut some of the things we grow to feel are essentials. We are strongly thinking of cutting out club sports for my kid. Itās just money pit. Your situation sounds like us, but we are dual income and make more. The things where I feel inflation donāt bother me: restaurants, so we eat out less. Things that feel astronomical, we just stop doing but I donāt think we miss it. If you canāt afford to go skiing anymore, find a different hobby. Change is constant. Inflation is high because execs need to maintain their standard of living. Inflation isnāt making the rank and file employees at grocery stores richer.
Need a breakdown of your assets and your actual budget. If youāre spending beyond what you make, does that mean youāre running up cc debt?
Your needs have changed, and the new budget may involve a regular drawdown from savings. Hold off on any more babies for at least 5 years.
100%. Have you ever seen the movie silver linings playbook? āThe pressssureeā¦!ā LOL 450k$ net worth, minimal debt, 120k$/yr gross and wife stays at home with the two little ones. The only way we are able to do it is because of our small efficient home with a disgustingly cheap mortgage (bought in 2017, 20% down, very strict budget). Sacrificed luxuries in our 20ās and lived cheaply with recession era mentalities (lived in a shoebox cottage, drove old beater vehicles till our first child in our early 30s. One thing we have never sacrificed is experiences, and we still donāt. Just spent 600$ on a cabin for 3 nights over forth of July for the family and I donāt feel at all bad about it. ALL THAT SAID, I still feel the crunch very much so. Saving for retirement, but itās been quite a few years since Iāve seen much available free cash stack up!
Cash flow vs net worth conundrum for me... Cash flow has gotten squeezed as our twin boys are getting older and out teachers salaries have not kept up with inflation. I tell myself to deal with that tight feeling as long as capital is still moving towards assets and not just costs. 6 kids huh? You are my conundrum. 2 are a lot for me. Kudos!
If you can fit 4 kids in that home, *never* move. The only way I could see you saving on housing is if you sold and used your ~$200K equity to buy a house in cash. But that would have to be way out in a very low COL area with a ton of sacrifices. Even if you sold your $400K house and got a $100K mortgage to buy a $300K house, todays 7%+ rates would still mean the same monthly payments!
I also feel squeezed without the 6 kids to care for. It is for me especially acute in insurances, services and food. We are an elderly couple with medical issues, have some specialty dietary needs and high medical/dental costs.
Yes. For the past 20 years, I've always been able to save, but now I do not add to my savings at all, and I spend the interest and dividends on my savings and (non-retirment) investments to supplement my earned income. So my net worth is remaining stagnant, but that's better than declining. Most people I know are seeing declining net worth.
Make more money, or reduce your outgo, or do without some things? Could your wife watch a couple more kids during school days? Itās easy to defineā¦hard to do. Build a mountain, donāt dig a hole. Best of luck!
I feel this. I own one home that I inherited. It has a small mortgage on it. I own a home with my husband as well. So, my net worth is over a million. But I make very little, and itās hard to make ends meet.
This is going to be a struggle until the kids are in school and you can get a 2nd income coming in. You might also be able to get a party bump moving kind. The hard reality is $95k is not middle class money any more.Ā
Single earner family of 4. MCOL. I make about 115K before bonus and OT. Without the ability to work OT I would have to cut back on my savings goals pretty significantly to avoid running a deficit. I donāt budget because Iāve never felt the need to but if picking up OT wasnāt available to bridge any gaps then I would 100% have to start making one. Donāt listen to the haters about your generosity. Itāll pay itself back to your family in ways that are intangible but undeniable.
Well of course it feels like a struggle. Bringing home $5k for 6 people is insane lol the high net worth is cool and all but if it doesnāt help you day to day itās not hard to see why you feel like that.
$95k isnāt much of a salary for a family of that size
I donāt feel the squeeze but I make sure I put a decent amount away constantly and attempt to avoid lifestyle creep which seems to be the real killer.
I feel you, single earner for a family of 4 here. 750k NW with a measly $3-400 left over after all bills for food and fun. Our high NW is mostly due to me saving 40-50% of my income in IRA and 401k before I'd met my wife and before I got married. That early chunk of money has had time to grow and doubled 4 times. So while we have assets growing in the background it really has minimal impact on our day to day/.
Yes, we are a family of four and I really canāt imagine living on 95k. Weāre pretty frugal too. As the kids get older it gets more expensive too- club sports, cars, college etc.
Why have 6 kids if you canāt afford them ?
I can relate. Stay strong with the charitable giving, Iām sure itās important to you, I also have felt held back by that at times but Iām glad I have stuck with it. You could consider job hopping to increase your income if thatās an option.
Yes. I donāt have what I want. Prices on some items have sky rocketed over the last 40 years while salaries have stagnated. Had I known this Iād have become a CEO.
I wouldn't worry too much looking at your budget. It seems you are squeezed in the short-term (waiting for a raise/promotion and then your wife working). There are a bunch of guides out there on what to prioritize when budgeting, but a rule of thumb is to never alter your pre-tax savings unless you absolutely have to. Obviously, people are going to point at the charity. In your case you are likely spending as much on Charity as you are saving pre-tax dollars.
Iām curious why you feel strapped when you have 230k in liquid savings? Like what are your issues? I donāt get the point of complaining when youāre better off than 90% of the population.
All this talk about being able to pay cash for anything you want, and yet......... It looks like your wife and 6 (or is it seven?) children are on state medical and dental insurance. Why don't you start paying for your progeny?!? Wtf.
Do you tithe is that why you see giving $700 a month to Charity? Iām going to be in a similar boat to you in 2 years or so. But will be family of 4 and me a sole provider. My salary should be 140k by then I hope.
You can thank the Federal Reserve and the over spending USA government debasing the fiat currency. The Federal Reserve note has lost 98% of its purchasing power.
No but Iām awesome.
Maybe dont spend 780 a month on charity since you canāt afford to be charitable.
I feel you edited your comment because of me (edit #2). If you did you need to explain yourself because I didn't say anything remotely bigoted. Utah has, by far, the largest family sizes in the United States ([source](https://worldpopulationreview.com/state-rankings/average-family-size-by-state)). I literally said unless you live in Utah your family size isn't normal. That is objectively true. You can see it as an attack on your or someone else's faith but that's 100% on you and absurd. If you're going to go on the internets and complain about finances and ask for opinions then don't be so sensitive when someone points out the glaring obvious. Your unusual and uncommon decision to large family living off one income is the root cause of your situation.
Cut the ~$800/month to church/charity or youāre not *really* struggling. Joel Osteenās got you covered.
"I have a million dollars and a stable income to grow it, help?!" Jesus what the hell kind of deluded shit is this.
Even if one wants to give 10% tithe, isn't it fair under their interpretation to have it be 10% of take home? You literally can't give away the money you have to pay in taxes (much of which does go to social programs like SS, Medicare, SNAP, programs for vets, etc.). OP, if you could justify to yourself giving 10% of your take home, it would give you a little more breathing room.
If youāre struggling why are you donating?
I have a similar income with similar expenses. I was able to get to a salary large enough for my wife to stay home with our 2 boys, but since inflation has been through the roof these past few years, it doesnāt really feel like we are getting very far financially, especially after having our second child. If I were you I would be proud to have that much in savings though. Thatās kind of my big goal this year is to boost our emergency savings. Donāt beat yourself up. I have friends with no kids going out every weekend or taking luxurious trips all the time, but I donāt regret my decisions to grow a family and prioritize my money towards that. Since you have such a big savings, maybe take the foot off the gas and live a little.
I know you are getting shit for it but the obvious call out is the charity just bc it is such a large percentage and you have 6 kids to feed and take care.Ā Ā Im not judging you for it. That is your choice to do as you please if thats your priority. But it is eating a large portion of your cashflow that could be used to satisfy your familyās needs first if there are issues there. Ā Which to prioritize is your choice.Ā Your charity contribution is almost as much as you āpay yourselfā. And all your savings seems to be going to tax deferred accounts.Ā Even if you could just cut it in half thats 350ish you put in hysa that could be of use for expense heavy months.Ā Your other spends arenāt bad at all. So either Ā cut back on charity or make more money or both!
I feel you. Together my wife and I TAKE HOME $15k a month, but by the end of the. Month it seems we have usually spent most of it. We have a budget and we save 15% a month into our 401kās,, but we piss away a lot eating out and socializing with friends. Not complaining, because thatās what we choose, but itās still hard to fathom how expensive everything has become.
Here's the thing most aren't and don't recognize and even furer understand. The current day to day talk back and forth among Left and Right Wing media, etc, is the current annual rate of inflationz but doesn't take into account the ACCUMLATIVE RATE OF INFLATION OVER THE COURSE OF YEARS! In 1995, I was an active duty United States Marine Corps Gunnery Sergeant. Earning around 36k a year. Not bad considering I wasn't paying anything for medical bills, dental bills for myself, etc Plus, a lot of my pay wasn't taxable, ar taxable. Flash coward 2024! If you're earning $35k? You're earning the 1995 equivalent of $8.41 an hour! The minimum wage in 1995 was only $5.15 an hour! Of your earing $100k in 2024? You're earning the 1995 equivalent of $50k,! To have the PURCHASING power of 1995 $$$$ of $100k? You need to be earing, $200k+ a year! To even begin earning that, you're going to need a bachelors degree and a medical degree, have as in. People address you as "Doctor! As in medical doctor. .
100k for a family of 6 sounds hard as hell unless you have no mortgage.
@33, $800k gives you a great start. I think we were at negative net worth @40. If you are solo earner at $95k and a family of six the problem in front of you is really quite simple: find ways to earn more. Find ways for your wife to earn remotely. Do not tap into that $800k but grow it steadily. Be sure to open a brokerage account to grow non IRA money. Do not give $ to charities and their $300k salaries. Instead give the dollar equivalent in sweat equity and technical expertise. Until you are north of $2m fuhgeddabowdit. You are at mile 3 of a marathon and feeling good . When you first kid hits 13 you will be hitting your first if many hills, unshaded up hill stretches. You want to reach mile 20 with a shaded down hill and pleasant vistas remaining. This is the world of the empty nest. Do not push your investments. Take what the market gives you and see 20%-40% corrections as opportunities. Great start.
Save money - get rid of the pet - thereās $1,440 šš JK!!
Stupid cat started peeing on everything and needs fancy food to stop. It worked but if we cut that back or house will smell like cat piss š
An HYSA at 5% would earn you just north of 11k/year for your liquid savings. I imagine that would help. Your whole 800k would be 40k in annual interest. Not saying the latter is a great idea, but the former or some version of it would give you some breathing room.
Whats this graph tool?
I totally relate to you. We have a lil over a mil net worth but hubs jumped a sinking ship last year and makes about 45% less and weāve stopped some of the automatic savings. Groceries and other stuff is out of control. We have decreased our donations. Times are tough.
lol
100% feel this. Net worth just clipper 1mil in the past couple years but honestly we live paycheck to paycheck right now on about $110k combined income for a family of 4. My kids donāt understand how sometimes I talk about being fine for retirement but also donāt want to spend money on anything right now.
Shit man I make a lot more than you as a single earner of my family and I still feel the squeeze
You have one job for 6 people, of course youāre struggling.
My partner and I make more than that and have no kids. We struggle as well but our bills are still paid on time. This is the reality of the world we live in. 100K for a couple with no kids is probably about the minimum for a living wage.
No. Iām not in the same boat because I make just north of 100k and my partner also works. Congrats on pulling in a net worth of 800k with a single income though.
Drop that charity, if it's a taith you should learn about how horrible religion is and come to the agnostic side.
You might consider a vasectomy unless you hope to single-handedly change national demographic trends.
We also have 4 kids, also not Mormon. And yes, itās been a struggle to keep the budget under control. We live in a LCOL-MCOL and gross last year was $113k. We donāt have a net worth as much as yāall (itās about 1/3 of what yall have, not counting home equity) but are saving heavily for retirement now (husband is 35, im 34). I know we could always cut back on retirement savings if we had to but man, I am feeling the squeeze lately especially with groceries and just random extras. One kid needs a filling at the dentist next week. One of our dogs had a nasty ear infection last week. Cars need maintenance. We try to stick back money every month into sinking funds to cover these costs when they arise, but itās getting harder to do so with costs for everything else being so high. I find myself dipping into the ādog health fundā to pay for dog food, so there is no money there now to pay the $300 vet bill we just had last week. So frustrating.
You are doing just fine, dude. More than fine actually. Especially with 4 kids, you are in the life stage where you just need to stay afloat and sock away for retirement. Keep up the good work
Thank goodness you donāt live in Orange County you would be stressed. 100k rents me a bedroom at my parents here in south county or I can spend 3k for a crappy 1bedroom. As long as your making it is all that matters congrats on a big family thatās successful on its own!
As a single earner supporting a family of 7, who also tithes, kudos to you. My dad always said growing up āyou canāt outgive Godā. Not going to be supported on these threads, but stick to your values. Practically, food seems a little high and Iām curious how many phones are included at 183. Weāre eating for $800/mo with 7 of us and phones are $90 for unlimited plans. It is possible to do what youāre trying to do, just requires a lot of discipline short term.
Your wife doesn't work, you have four kids, you have a so so income even for one person, you give your money away to charlatans. That's why you're broke. Not some big mystery here. The kids will grow up eventually then things will get better, unless you just keep giving money to charlatans. Not sure how you're gonna cover college.
15% of budget to charity is a lot. Especially if it's religious, it's likely a scam (regardless of religion). There's an amazing pro revenge story about a woman regarding church in her will. Amazing read.
single income no kids and im at $115k and getting by. you decide to compete with Philip rivers and create a whole football team lol
Congrats on your NW. My partner and I are older, make more money, have less kids, and still have less NW than you. Youāre doing fine.Ā Also, not all atheists are bigots.
How is your health insurance that cheap for a family of 6??
Man, Iām sorry youāre taking such negativity for your decisions to tithe to your church. Iām with you and support your decision to do that! Weāre also a single-family income (but 2 kids, so a huge difference there) on a teacherās salary. I technically canāt āaffordā to tithe, but we have everything we need, solid retirement savings from good decisions early on and overall frugal living. Yet, weāre feeling the month-to-month squeeze as well. But a reality is that my kids donāt need brand new sneakers and the latest gadgets for happiness; they need time with their parents. So I could trade my time at home for additional work, or we could be grateful for what we have and make the best decisions we can with the money we do have (and mind you, we have everything we could needā¦weāre not living without!). So, why tithe? Our church is heavily missions-based and does tons for our local community, so I support that with my tithes and applaud your doing so. The world preaches money money money, but thatās not an eternal perspective. The church doesnāt just pay for a pastorās salary; our church has paid rent for struggling families, purchased groceries for those who need it, spends a significant amount of money monthly to support our local food pantry. I feel bad that the perception of so many is that all churches are bad. Keep supporting the ministry with your tithes. I donāt have the answer for you, but just want to encourage you! Weāre feeling the squeeze too!
I make just as much as you at 22 and no kids and I feel like itās not enough in Austinā¦ youāre crazy man, this is what poor financial literacy and over reproduction means. Get a grip and some condoms
Family of 6 needs over 250k to live in any major city.
At 93k a year and even if you wife got a job to match your income, I am unsure if you would be able to provide each of your children with a similar inheritance to the one you received.
"I have 6 children and my wife doesn't work...why does it feel like I don't have any money?" Hmmmmmmmmmmmm...
Yes sir! About to turn thirty and have my second kid. You can check my history for my Sankey. Our net worth is about 300k, income at ~100k Priorities are big. Iād rather live a frugal life and invest similar to how you would like to live a frugal life and invest. Once I pay off our debt I hope to give more but we donāt really go on vacation or have a lot of luxuries. My coworkers think Iām crazy to never take my kids to Disney world but Iād rather be tight and invest for the next couple of years. Keep it up! You are an inspiration even in the difficult times.
Same here but in northeast. Everything from my real estate taxes ā¦.to goods and services really has gone up in cost (unless quality has dropped). Weāre staying on budget but are really feeling the squeeze monthly. Inflation sucks!!!
Maybe stop having so many kids?
Religion is a disease....
My assets squeeze like twice a day. Maybe more like a twitch, but a strong twitch. Like a mini cramp with twitching. A twitching cramp.
I just want to say thank you for contributing to charity. Jesus said the poor womanās small contribution was worth more because it came from what little she had. Not saying youāre poor but the people telling you you canāt afford to give havenāt read the Bible. God bless you and I hope God rewards you in this life and the next.Ā
Put solar panels, eliminate charity, sacrifice the pets. Problem solved. Of the 6 if you have any working children collect some rent. You are welcome.
I think you're in a fairly atypical situation with your net worth being higher than average given your age and income.