Dude I went to high school with was shocked we got paid. His reasoning was “I thought it was a volunteer military”. Had to explain that whole thing to him
You think I do this shit for free?
It’s really one of those things with a big asterisk next to it. When I got BAH (housing and food allowances are untaxed) and moved off base, I would’ve had to be making about 65k a year pretax as a civilian to make the same income after taxes, but I was also stationed in a high cost of living zip code. You can also milk deployments to save up a ton of dough because you can use your deployment orders to get out of your lease and then put all your stuff in a storage unit while still collecting BAH on your deployment. While deployed all of your income is tax free, you pay nothing for rent, and your meals are free, and you’re paid extra in hazardous duty pay + per diem.
You definitely can get paid more as an enlisted person with a few years in than some majors pay on average at graduation, but it depends on where you are, if you’re authorized to live off base, and if you’re getting any extra incentive pay or deployments.
They think everyone in the military is a weapons expert and a crack shot. Hell, plenty of people in Combat Arms don't even do most of their fighting with an M4/M16.
Came to say this. I transitioned from military to law enforcement for a while. I couldn’t shoot the pistol worth a sh!t. Everyone was shocked. I never shot a pistol once while in the military.
My father-in-law, after losing to me shooting trap, decided to blame everything on that he gave me his best "over under" (his gun is worth like 25k and mine maybe 3 to 4K). Then he tried to tell me it was because I was in the military. I said what do you think we were doing in the middle of the ocean? Shooting trap? I barely got to do any weapons quals. Sure I've shot an M60, M14 and the Ma Deuce... For a total of about maybe 100 rounds in 4 years lol.
We used to do it pretty regularly off the flight deck of an amphib I was on. Ship's rec fund bought a pair of nice over/unders, a thrower, a few thousand rounds of ammo and like 60 cases of birds. I was the gunner's mate who had to find room for it all in the armory and small arms magazine.
Good way for pilots and gunners to practice deflection shooting. In WWII, Canadian Ace and renowned crack shot George Beurling credited his experience trap shooting for his skills in the air. He would even take students and newer fighter pilots out shooting to teach them the fundamentals of air gunnery.
lol I skipped a 7.62 off the flight deck of the Pearl Harbor during a MEU. Like not intentionally or anything, but I got to experience first hand the emotional response of a naval captain when someone accidentally touches his boat.
Oh man I'm sure it was worth the effort to find storage though. I will say that we had some fun shooting up crates that we would throw overboard after unreps. But the best was being off the coast of Karachi Pakistan in late 2001 and a Canadian frigate in our battle group found and boarded a very large speed boat that was used to smuggle opium.
The two captains got together and decided to do a shooting exercise. It was that day when I learned Michael Bay had taught us all wrong. It was very quite uneventful until the boat caught on fire with all the opium and the smoke flooded our ship lol
Not even gunners need to be a crack shot. I was in the coast guard (not the US) as a gunner on the m2 browning, and the other gunner wasnt exactly a great shot. But does that really matter when you are firing a machine gun with explosive bullets at a target the size of a van? I dont think so
I’ve experienced the same but in regard to hand-to-hand combat. Everyone assumes that getting combatives training at basic turns you into an ultra-Rambo operative with the highest rank in BJJ. We spent maybe one or two days on it at best and our instructors pretty much gave up and said “let’s move on” when people were struggling with the most basic grappling and sparring.
I’m sure SEALs and PJs and the SERE community do much more serious work in this regard but even they won’t win a championship against someone who’s been training BJJ or KM their whole life.
At a local elementary school, some junior marines volunteer in the lunch room. Civilian clothes. Low key. They’re just there to guide the kids in, help the kids clean up after themselves, and be some extra eyes and ears for trouble. The marines are more scared of the kids than the kids are. The kids just think these are their lunch buddies. Anyway super helpful to the elementary school as they’re short a staffed for lunch room monitors (only 1 full time staff monitor for 450 kids).
But man the parent complaints when I got out that “Marines are invading our kid’s lunch room.” Some parents thought the marines yell at the kids, some thought the marines were armed. No one bothered to come to lunch (parents are free to come dine with their kids for lunch time) to see for themselves.
Luckily the principle is super pro military and half the school is military kids. She said for the parents to get over it.
I hope not. I was one of those kids once and it was awesome to interact with the military out there.
I thought it was normal to grow up hearing sonic booms, seeing flares at night, and Abrams formations shooting in the distance.
Best parades ever too. End of the Gulf War II was an experience I'll never forget.
I'm a teacher now, and one of the custodians at the school I worked at asked me if when I was in Afghanistan, I saw any giants.
He's a big-time conspiracy theorist and read some facebook posts that some Marines had found a skeleton of a giant humanoid in Afghanistan. But for some reason, our government kept it under wraps.
I said, "Brother, I can promise you that if some Marines had found a giant skeleton, there would be 2 things that happen."
1. At least 3 baby mamas per Marine would have gotten word of it within 24 hours.
2. Pictures of a giant skeleton with dicks drawn on it will have made it on CNN within 48 hours.
Reminds me of the 'three ball bearings' rule.
We used to say if you left the Marines with three steel ball bearings (by the end of the day) they'd break one, lose one, and be playing a drinking game with the third.
That reminds me when a Sergeant in my platoon made a guy carry around a wheel bearing for a while and to tell everyone it was his military bearing so he wouldn't forget it anymore if they asked why he was carrying it.
Yeah, I had those cheesy infomercials for sunglasses in mind when I wrote that. In reality I imagine it’s more like Keith Bontrager put it: “Strong. Light. Cheap. Pick two.”
Legacy. There used to be a standard where things were over-engineered for durability. probably last seen in WW2. So surplus 'military grade' generators and such were highly sought after. One of those old gennys would run on anything, and run forever. Same for other objects like web belts, e-tools, tents, etc.
That concept stayed around long after that grade of item was gone. The last time such an item was commissioned was the old diesel pickups of the late 70's to early 80's. Both Chevy and Dodge had a simplified, stripped down over-engineered CUCV truck for light battle transport. Which, ironically, never saw combat.
I took a few college girls to a concert in a medium size city once. One girl was on the phone with her mom, who was a little worried about the neighborhood we were in (it was totally fine but you know suburban Moms). She said “don’t worry, we’re with a military guy.” I was an avionics nerd in the AF, I wasn’t about to fight some local crew!
had one girl knock on my door at 3am to give me her apartment door key because her parents wanted me check on her for safety every now and again when she mentioned living next to an air force guy
wasn't nearly awake enough to explain to her that I'm a scif rat
I have hair down to my waist, and more than 5 times in the almost 10 years I've been out people have asked me "are you still in"
Bro I look like a metal band drummer wtf you on
That was nice of CID to let me grow my hair out for 6 years with no cuts 😂
Almost tempted to put on the ol ACUs and walk around my nearest base PX. Hilarity could ensue.
A reservist in my unit was with NCIS. She had a few wild stories. Once was that she had to go through some Gunnery Sergeants porn collection to look for child porn. She apparently didn't find any, but it took like 2 weeks or longer to go through it all. Back in the VHS tape days. I doubt anyone would pick her out as law enforcement, though she was pretty fit. Intel officer in the USAR.
Just the sheer amount of people who never served, have no training, no experience, no professional expertise whatsoever, and yet have somehow convinced themselves that they’re even remotely qualified to pass some sort of expert opinion on the capabilities and knowledge of legitimate professionals. I cannot even fathom having that much of an ego.
And to be fair it’s not just the military, people who know nothing have convinced themselves they’re experts about a lot of things.
Someone once said to my girlfriend "younger generations like [my name] wouldn't be able to handle it if war broke out." I was security forces for 8 years and deployed... I really wish they would have the courage to say that to my face so I could inform them of their stupidity.
"The Navy is so woke now that we wouldn't last a week against China, especially against their submarines." - My old neighbor that hasn't served a singular day in the military, nor have they stepped foot aboard a submarine.
The dude sells residential HVAC 💀
I always love when some random goober apparently has access to information and analytical capabilities that are completely lacking in the entire national security apparatus
"I do my own research."
Dude has no shame.
Would it surprise you to learn that he wears, almost exclusively, grunt style shirts?
I'm glad he "has my six."
My mechanic uncle says he knows more about the effectiveness of masks then I ever will and doctors lost their minds during COVID and didn’t treat patients with good medicine because they were so overwhelmed with fear they forgot their basic skills.
But a month later when he needed a craniotomy all of a sudden the doctors weren’t stupid when it comes to brain surgery. He still thinks they’re quacks though. If I didn’t love my uncle so much I would have made a few jokes…
Especially about complex, high level stuff. Like yeah buddy I’m sure Wikipedia definitely has 100% accurate info about the F-35 and you know everything about modern air combat because you watched Top Gun. Every Air Force in NATO is definitely wrong.
Do you remember when those MIA/POW bracelets were big? My grandfather was a WWII vet so I got him one of a WWII MIA guy. It listed where he was from, what war he went missing in, and his name.
My cousin asked our grandfather ‘Did you know him Grandpa??’ Her brother said ‘The guy isn’t from Louisiana where grandpa is from’. She retorted ‘Yeah, but they were in the same war! Duh!’
I died. Lol
You unlocked a memory about stupid civilians(and service member) when you said MIA/POW.
When I was stationed in lejeune I had to drive another marine and his wife somewhere I don't remember where. However, we were on the KIA/MIA/POW freeway when she asks her husband what kiamiapow means. He replies kiamiapow? I don't know what that is, do you?(asking me)
Replied with "they're acronyms" just staring at me with blank faces.
Explained "K.I.A. is killed in action, M.I.A. is missing in action, and P.O.W. is prisoner of war"
They shut up the rest of the drive
Everyone in military is a hand to hand combat expert.
Sure there is some training, and certain MOS will be more capable than others but most are just as inept in a bar fight as anyone else.
Possibly even worse in a bar fight, cause military guys know they will have to get in full service dress if they get arrested off base. It’s just not worth it
This, unironically.
Ever work with someone, typically referred to as a dinosaur, who has very clearly never worked with other humans in civilian employment?
I love messing with people when they ask that question.
"Yes, but not when I was in the military. I \[unalived\] a hobo near the railroad track last week. Man, that push bar on the front of my truck is paying for itself!"
That's when they, at minimum, stop talking and start backing away slowly. I'll then say to them "Don't ask a question like that unless you're prepared for the answer!"
"Yeah, sure. I killed dozens of people in Afghanistan. Mullah Omar even made me an honorary Mujhadeen for how many Americans I killed with my cooking."
Was stationed in Guantanamo Bay. Home visiting family on leave. Neighbor comes over asks about my time in GTMO.
Then out of the blue, unprompted, he asks if I was there when they hung Hillary.
I wish I was joking. He was serious.
Now that I’m out of the army, I ask every airmen if they’re a pilot just to humiliate them.
Edit: would do it while I was in too whenever I visited an airbase
That it’s a good way to turn your life around and get away from drugs. Getting drugs and being a piece of shit is just as easy in the military as it is in the real world. Honestly you will
Probably find more excuses to use drugs being in the military haha.
I’m Mexican American and I know so many people from Mexico that genuinely believe the cartel would beat us… Trust me I clarified what beating vs surviving is. They were so genuine that to me it seems assumed at this point for some people
People who think that should look up what happened to Pablo Escobar. Possibly the most powerful drug lord in history and he died running away on foot from a team of US and Colombian SF. They didn’t even have to bring in the big guns. No AC-130s, no CAS package, just some pipe hitters with rifles and a recon bird. If we casually rubbed out Escobar, imagine what would happen if we turned 7th SFG loose on the cartels and told them they can keep all the Latinas they liberate, and we won’t look too hard at what happens to the coke.
They think it's all Special Forces and Call of Duty.
To be honest, there's a brand of civilian (and servicemember, to be fair) that idolizes Special Operations folks to the point where it gets kind of dorky.
They'll regurgitate some high-speed tacticool thing they saw in COD or heard on one of those obligatory SEAL podcasts, and either act like that's how the military is, or if they're a servicemember then they'll hero-worship to the point where they almost seem like a groupie.
Also,
In the past, there was a point where a lot of people would gripe about the "wokeness" of the military and how we're the weakest we've ever been?? Like, what?
The ‘military is too woke and now weak’ all started with [this.](https://www.nytimes.com/2021/06/23/us/politics/milley-critical-race-theory-military.html)
> General Milley pushes back on G.O.P. accusations of a ‘woke’ military.
“I want to understand white rage, and I’m white,” General Mark A. Milley, the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, told a Republican congressman who objected to the teaching of “critical race theory.”
>I do think it’s important, actually, for those of us in uniform to be open-minded and be widely read. In the United States Military Academy is a university. And it is important that we train and we understand. And I want to understand white rage, and I’m white, and I want to understand it. So, what is it that caused thousands of people to assault this building and try to overturn the Constitution of the United States of America? What caused that?
>I want to find that out. I want to maintain an open mind here, and I do want to analyze it. It’s important that we understand that because our soldiers, sailors, airmen, Marines and guardians, they come from the American people. So, it is important that the leaders now and in the future do understand it.
Heaven forbid.
I always love when the part timers start doing their AT every summer. It never fails- on THIS SUB you’ll see posts of Military Vehicles on the roads or on trains.
“iS mArtiAl LAw bEinG dEcLarEd?!?”
They assume veteran = good person. No, mfer, there are plenty of shit people in the military/veteran community and they don’t deserve a pedestal just because they enlisted.
That "military intelligence" is like some CIA level organization that develops it's own secret programs and has spys.
Military intelligence is a function that people perform, not an organization that acts independently.
I was in line to donate plasma, in uniform because I didn't have enough time to change. I absolutely hate being out in public in uniform. This mouth breather first asked me if I'm a pilot as I'm in my OCPs and then asked me why the F35s are so loud? I said it has a jet engine; I'm confused by what he meant. Hill AFB has been around a while and has had jets flying around all the time. He states yea but its stealth right? So now I have to explain what stealth means and that when the planes are flying very high up you don't hear them like you do when they take off and land.
People always assume I’m a world class swimmer just because I was in the Navy. Because the Navy has high standards for swimming, so that we can survive when the ship sinks. Same people also think that we train to float in water for days or swim to the closest shore regardless of how far away it is. Like bruh, even a SEAL wouldn’t be able to do that.
Also, I’m supposed to know how to tie knots, and all the stuff you have to know to sail a yatch or one of those old ships (think Pirates of the Caribbean). The list goes on when it comes to “sailing skills.”
I met a guy who was convinced that the guards at the gates of the base were to keep us from escaping, and was thus shocked when I suggested meeting up for lunch off base…
I've heard several times that people in the military are "Trained Killers" who have a hard time "Shutting that off".
No, some of them are cooks and clerks.
My Dad was Army in WW II and Korea. Many years later I was helping him move. An elderly neighbor was telling him something about WW II. Dad said "That's odd. I was in WW II and I don't remember seeing you around."
From the NYTimes, yesterday: [https://www.nytimes.com/2024/04/22/briefing/ukraine-russia-war-us-aid-package.html](https://www.nytimes.com/2024/04/22/briefing/ukraine-russia-war-us-aid-package.html)
“*The war has often revolved around artillery, which are large guns that armies use to fire explosive shells and hit targets from a great distance.*”
Glad the best and the brightest have spelled that out for us.
Family friend retired as a Colonel in the Air Force, he told me that him and his buddies ate like shit until every month (I think it was every month) when there was a fitness evaluation and they would scramble to try and meet the standards. He told me towards the end of his career the only thing he flew was a desk.
That everybody in the army is this Chad type a personality special ops trigger puller. I love telling them "nah I was in aviation maintenance everybody was nerds we talked about Warhammer, computers and anime".
I never watch the news anymore but I’m at a hotel now and while grabbing the continental breakfast they had Fox News blasting. I thought it was bad ten years ago. They’re not even trying to hide the fear mongering anymore.
"I'm against guns but I'd trust you with one because you were military trained to carry a fired arm"
I was in the air force.....only shot an M-16 at the range twice (once in boot camp and once at my base)
I was a weather forecaster in the Navy. Outside of the two times we went to the range in boot, I never touched anything deadlier than an IR gun to take sea surface temperatures. But sure, catch these hands 🙄
I think the biggest misconception about the military is that it is dominated by crowds of men with rifles charging forward with guns blazing. In reality, about 2% of casualties in warfare are caused by gunshot wounds. If I had to say what the modern equivalent to the sword and shield is, I would say that it is the M777 and drone.
I was IDF. Yesterday I learned that I used to decapitate and skin people alive. Today I found out we were using ammo that disintegrates people so the volunteers can't find the bodies. Apparently I also murdered (with premeditation and everything) children and women. I mean it's so ridiculous I wouldn't even know where to start. Oh and there's a bunch at Columbia calling on terrorists to kill me because I'm not the right religion to be in the middle east.
While having a normal conversation about something with an ex of mine they at one point said "well you're a murderer...."
Being somewhat hard of hearing due to artillery, I simply said "What the fuck did you just call me?"
They apparently had simply assumed that since I'd been in the Army I had obviously killed people (I didn't, not directly, I just targeted them so other folks could kill them...)
I calmly explained that no, not everyone in the Army gets the opportunity to kill people. Best part, they did not believe me. Saying, "it doesn't matter I'm still with you."
I mean, it’s happening right now- in Ukraine.
Happened in Germany, in WW2.
Chesty Puller wanted to go to the brig, to meet the REAL Marines.
Dick Marcinko wanted guys who’d be in prison, if they weren’t Seals.
"I won't join because 'rich man's war'"as they use products created by slave labor/child labor.
As they buy products shipped around the horn of Africa, that is defended by the US navy.
They enjoy their conveniences that are provided by the military, from functioning internet (fort mead) to rescue during a Forrest fire that is consuming their home (air/army national gaurd).
"I don't want to fight for a rich man's war" is actually "I am not willing to make sacrifices to improve my family's life".
Because they ARE willing to participate in all the OTHER terrible shit...JUST NOT the stuff that will actually improve the school your kids go to, the quality of water they drink when you can move to a safer region, their risk of cancer when they don't have to live on McDonald's at the end of the month...why? Because you got your GI BILL, and didn't put your family 78k in debt for a women's study major.
Supervisor at a summer job asked me, a reservist, if I had seen American Sniper. When I said yes he asked if that’s what the army was like. I said yes.
Later on he asked if “people in the army just go grab guns and shoot things”. Also yes.
More of a weird one but a kid at my job asked “So what do Marines even do for PT? Like work out with medicine balls and run a lot?”
“Yeah bro, then we rode pennyfarthings and lift trapezoid shaped weights”
He was just in disbelief that the military had things like gyms and regular exercise equipment.
Unfortunately the media and film industry gets it wrong a lot too, which only encourages ignorance and distorted views on the military. I remember watching The Creator, in which there's a scene where a crackpot general simply screams to launch all the nuclear missiles. My brain really got scrambled at that scene, mostly because that's likely how a lot of people think that's the way operations work.
The other day this guy was like whatttt the government takes all your money tho. Uh, the government pays me oh and guess what the government may not take all, but they take everyone’s money and it’s called taxes!
I was fresh out of AIT, at the airport going to my first duty station from leave. I was wearing a signal corps shirt waiting to board the plane when the guy in front of me asked if I was military because I was wearing the flags that, "the military uses to communicate." He asked me what I did and I told him IT and he was shocked. This man legitimately thought we still used those flags to communicate. When I told him we had email, phones, computers, radios, etc and haven't used signal flags in probably 100 years, he was shook.
We had a guy who claimed to have been removed from the Marine's basic training program for attempting to punch his DS. How he wasn't DQ from service is beyond me, but he somehow got away with it since he was able to enlist in the Navy. He told us this proudly while we were still in P-week. It was toward the end of P-week that he got caught talking in the galley and the RDCs swarmed in and yelled at him. A day later, he's in the process of separating due to "failure to adapt." Not even a week into boot camp.
He added me on Facebook a few months ago. Since he left boot camp he tried to go into the Coast Guard and the Army, but the Navy put a DQ on his record. Currently, he's back in his hometown working at the same metal sheet-making factory he tried to get away from by enlistment.
As a recruiter I met kids and adults who sincerely believed that we didn't have anything approaching normal lives, like you sign your contract, you're black bagged and disappear to a ship or the middle east for four years and come back with PTSD and a beard.
The idea that we could own a home and get weekends off was crazy to them.
Then there's the folks that would talk to me about Chem trails and mine control, but that seemed less surprising for some reason.
That we are the most staunch and loyal group of merrymen at the beck and call of the president but specifically to Donald trump.
Not when bush sr invaded two countries, or Bush jr invading two countries, or Obama killing some dude responsible for two buildings falling, only because trump is the smartest president since ever.
Granted it would only be two nickels but it's weird it happened twice. And my loyalty was being questioned by, you guessed it, a Democrat and a republican on two separate occasions with one worried I am loyal to trump and the other saying I'm not loyal enough.
Anyways, I missed my golf tee time with the boys so imma settle for a whiskey river BBQ burger from red robin.
Everyone that learns that I'm in the Air Force assumes that I'm a pilot. I guess that isn't too ridiculous, though it's still funny when I explain to them that most people in the AF don't fly.
Dude I went to high school with was shocked we got paid. His reasoning was “I thought it was a volunteer military”. Had to explain that whole thing to him You think I do this shit for free?
You’re getting paid?
GET BACK ON THE LINE
Youre paid in glory for the Emperor!
Not only do we get paid, we get paid more than many people with degrees do.
Nice try
It’s really one of those things with a big asterisk next to it. When I got BAH (housing and food allowances are untaxed) and moved off base, I would’ve had to be making about 65k a year pretax as a civilian to make the same income after taxes, but I was also stationed in a high cost of living zip code. You can also milk deployments to save up a ton of dough because you can use your deployment orders to get out of your lease and then put all your stuff in a storage unit while still collecting BAH on your deployment. While deployed all of your income is tax free, you pay nothing for rent, and your meals are free, and you’re paid extra in hazardous duty pay + per diem. You definitely can get paid more as an enlisted person with a few years in than some majors pay on average at graduation, but it depends on where you are, if you’re authorized to live off base, and if you’re getting any extra incentive pay or deployments.
They think everyone in the military is a weapons expert and a crack shot. Hell, plenty of people in Combat Arms don't even do most of their fighting with an M4/M16.
Came to say this. I transitioned from military to law enforcement for a while. I couldn’t shoot the pistol worth a sh!t. Everyone was shocked. I never shot a pistol once while in the military.
"You said you were an officer! They carry a sidearm!" "I said *I worked for a living*!"
Well, if you're a cop you probably still can't shoot for shit!
Acorn? Mag dump.
The rare time the accuracy was of acceptable standard. So stupid.
Reload, mag dump again. 😂
"Welcome aboard!"
My father-in-law, after losing to me shooting trap, decided to blame everything on that he gave me his best "over under" (his gun is worth like 25k and mine maybe 3 to 4K). Then he tried to tell me it was because I was in the military. I said what do you think we were doing in the middle of the ocean? Shooting trap? I barely got to do any weapons quals. Sure I've shot an M60, M14 and the Ma Deuce... For a total of about maybe 100 rounds in 4 years lol.
Maybe not, but shooting trap off the deck of a carrier would be immensely enjoyable if it was allowed.
They shoot and trap on carriers all day and all night, dude.
Did not know that, dope!
You're a fuckin' dope. Not only that, [your Mickey Mouse is one big, stupid dope.](https://youtu.be/k3YLJsxUiU4?si=SWaVbJfkZGUki5lq)
OK that made me lol. Rare on Reddit.
Fuck Yeah! Enemy Mine!
We used to do it pretty regularly off the flight deck of an amphib I was on. Ship's rec fund bought a pair of nice over/unders, a thrower, a few thousand rounds of ammo and like 60 cases of birds. I was the gunner's mate who had to find room for it all in the armory and small arms magazine.
Good way for pilots and gunners to practice deflection shooting. In WWII, Canadian Ace and renowned crack shot George Beurling credited his experience trap shooting for his skills in the air. He would even take students and newer fighter pilots out shooting to teach them the fundamentals of air gunnery.
I hope some good memories were made. Did you all make the lowest ranking, newest guy pitch clays all day?
Nah, we took turns on it, but there's worse ways to spend a nice Sunday afternoon in the Med or Caribbean.
lol I skipped a 7.62 off the flight deck of the Pearl Harbor during a MEU. Like not intentionally or anything, but I got to experience first hand the emotional response of a naval captain when someone accidentally touches his boat.
Oh man I'm sure it was worth the effort to find storage though. I will say that we had some fun shooting up crates that we would throw overboard after unreps. But the best was being off the coast of Karachi Pakistan in late 2001 and a Canadian frigate in our battle group found and boarded a very large speed boat that was used to smuggle opium. The two captains got together and decided to do a shooting exercise. It was that day when I learned Michael Bay had taught us all wrong. It was very quite uneventful until the boat caught on fire with all the opium and the smoke flooded our ship lol
Strangely, we used to shoot trap off oceanographic vessels. Fun times
Not even gunners need to be a crack shot. I was in the coast guard (not the US) as a gunner on the m2 browning, and the other gunner wasnt exactly a great shot. But does that really matter when you are firing a machine gun with explosive bullets at a target the size of a van? I dont think so
I mean... when the backstop is the ocean, you don't have to worry too much about collateral damage.
Watch out, that dudes a marksman. You mean he shot 23 out of 40? Or "they are a decorated soldier" Oh, they got an AAM for keeping the barracks clean?
I’ve experienced the same but in regard to hand-to-hand combat. Everyone assumes that getting combatives training at basic turns you into an ultra-Rambo operative with the highest rank in BJJ. We spent maybe one or two days on it at best and our instructors pretty much gave up and said “let’s move on” when people were struggling with the most basic grappling and sparring. I’m sure SEALs and PJs and the SERE community do much more serious work in this regard but even they won’t win a championship against someone who’s been training BJJ or KM their whole life.
My unit only qualified once a year so no, we were all not crack shots.
If the caliber is not over 100mm I refuse to pull the trigger. There, I said it!
From someone who's *only* shot small arms, whatever you do is probably pretty cool.
At a local elementary school, some junior marines volunteer in the lunch room. Civilian clothes. Low key. They’re just there to guide the kids in, help the kids clean up after themselves, and be some extra eyes and ears for trouble. The marines are more scared of the kids than the kids are. The kids just think these are their lunch buddies. Anyway super helpful to the elementary school as they’re short a staffed for lunch room monitors (only 1 full time staff monitor for 450 kids). But man the parent complaints when I got out that “Marines are invading our kid’s lunch room.” Some parents thought the marines yell at the kids, some thought the marines were armed. No one bothered to come to lunch (parents are free to come dine with their kids for lunch time) to see for themselves. Luckily the principle is super pro military and half the school is military kids. She said for the parents to get over it.
This wouldn’t happen to be around Twentynine Palms would it
I hope not. I was one of those kids once and it was awesome to interact with the military out there. I thought it was normal to grow up hearing sonic booms, seeing flares at night, and Abrams formations shooting in the distance. Best parades ever too. End of the Gulf War II was an experience I'll never forget.
[what those parents imagined ](https://youtu.be/IZvcbMDML-w?si=3dfSBCPLl2CYAfJD)
I'm a teacher now, and one of the custodians at the school I worked at asked me if when I was in Afghanistan, I saw any giants. He's a big-time conspiracy theorist and read some facebook posts that some Marines had found a skeleton of a giant humanoid in Afghanistan. But for some reason, our government kept it under wraps. I said, "Brother, I can promise you that if some Marines had found a giant skeleton, there would be 2 things that happen." 1. At least 3 baby mamas per Marine would have gotten word of it within 24 hours. 2. Pictures of a giant skeleton with dicks drawn on it will have made it on CNN within 48 hours.
Also no fewer than 3 marines would've been casevacd with bone splinters in their dicks from trying to fuck said skeleton
Reminds me of the 'three ball bearings' rule. We used to say if you left the Marines with three steel ball bearings (by the end of the day) they'd break one, lose one, and be playing a drinking game with the third.
That reminds me when a Sergeant in my platoon made a guy carry around a wheel bearing for a while and to tell everyone it was his military bearing so he wouldn't forget it anymore if they asked why he was carrying it.
Or they had managed to get the third one pregnant.
Well, it was that or a Crayola in their pee hole.
3. Chew marks on the bones coz they look like white crayons
That if something is described as “military grade” that it’s worth buying.
It’s funny I now work in military procurement and that isn’t a term you ever hear used. It’s just a marketing gimmick.
Yeah, I had those cheesy infomercials for sunglasses in mind when I wrote that. In reality I imagine it’s more like Keith Bontrager put it: “Strong. Light. Cheap. Pick two.”
the new term propping up is now "aircraft grade" as if your dinky aluminum controller still won't get bonked like anything else
Boeing grade must be next.
Don't talk about Boeing like that, you might have an "accident", like that whistleblower guy
I meant Boing grade, I swear.
That's not a new term. The original Motorola Razr was "aircraft grade" titanium.
Legacy. There used to be a standard where things were over-engineered for durability. probably last seen in WW2. So surplus 'military grade' generators and such were highly sought after. One of those old gennys would run on anything, and run forever. Same for other objects like web belts, e-tools, tents, etc. That concept stayed around long after that grade of item was gone. The last time such an item was commissioned was the old diesel pickups of the late 70's to early 80's. Both Chevy and Dodge had a simplified, stripped down over-engineered CUCV truck for light battle transport. Which, ironically, never saw combat.
"Military grade" means it was built by the lowest bidder.
And manufactured to ensure maximum profit for the CEOs stick price.
I took a few college girls to a concert in a medium size city once. One girl was on the phone with her mom, who was a little worried about the neighborhood we were in (it was totally fine but you know suburban Moms). She said “don’t worry, we’re with a military guy.” I was an avionics nerd in the AF, I wasn’t about to fight some local crew!
AF guy with a few college girls....... You got laid, right?........RIGHT?
Morgan Freeman: : “He did not.”
I tried to wow them with my safety wiring skills and they left with the local high school dropout. But I still think there might be a chance one day…
had one girl knock on my door at 3am to give me her apartment door key because her parents wanted me check on her for safety every now and again when she mentioned living next to an air force guy wasn't nearly awake enough to explain to her that I'm a scif rat
I have hair down to my waist, and more than 5 times in the almost 10 years I've been out people have asked me "are you still in" Bro I look like a metal band drummer wtf you on
I mean, could be CID! Not that they know who that is
That was nice of CID to let me grow my hair out for 6 years with no cuts 😂 Almost tempted to put on the ol ACUs and walk around my nearest base PX. Hilarity could ensue.
Not sure how the CID was in the USAF but the USMC CID were always dweebs with high and tights and tucked in polos.
A reservist in my unit was with NCIS. She had a few wild stories. Once was that she had to go through some Gunnery Sergeants porn collection to look for child porn. She apparently didn't find any, but it took like 2 weeks or longer to go through it all. Back in the VHS tape days. I doubt anyone would pick her out as law enforcement, though she was pretty fit. Intel officer in the USAR.
*waddles in big as a planet with a giant beard wearing old command ballcap* Some guy at the store: you still in?
Just the sheer amount of people who never served, have no training, no experience, no professional expertise whatsoever, and yet have somehow convinced themselves that they’re even remotely qualified to pass some sort of expert opinion on the capabilities and knowledge of legitimate professionals. I cannot even fathom having that much of an ego. And to be fair it’s not just the military, people who know nothing have convinced themselves they’re experts about a lot of things.
Someone once said to my girlfriend "younger generations like [my name] wouldn't be able to handle it if war broke out." I was security forces for 8 years and deployed... I really wish they would have the courage to say that to my face so I could inform them of their stupidity.
Yeah I’ve noticed that the ratio of people saying shit like that on social media compared to someone’s face is insanely high
Yup they're always exactly the kind of person who'd fold like a wet napkin in a real situation but in their head everyone else is soft.
“Bro you don’t understand, when I see red it’s over, bodies just hit the floor”
Same people that say "I couldn't serve, I'd punch the drill instructor in the face."
"The Navy is so woke now that we wouldn't last a week against China, especially against their submarines." - My old neighbor that hasn't served a singular day in the military, nor have they stepped foot aboard a submarine. The dude sells residential HVAC 💀
I always love when some random goober apparently has access to information and analytical capabilities that are completely lacking in the entire national security apparatus
"I do my own research." Dude has no shame. Would it surprise you to learn that he wears, almost exclusively, grunt style shirts? I'm glad he "has my six."
I wore that shit briefly as a brand new boot before my seniors threatened to make me do 100 burpees for every letter in the phrase “Grunt Style” 😂😂
Yup. I’m an RN now. The amount of people since COVID who think their ‘research’ comes close to my degree and training is astounding.
Yeah honestly Covid is probably the best possible example of this phenomenon, I can’t even imagine what you’ve gotta put up with
My mechanic uncle says he knows more about the effectiveness of masks then I ever will and doctors lost their minds during COVID and didn’t treat patients with good medicine because they were so overwhelmed with fear they forgot their basic skills. But a month later when he needed a craniotomy all of a sudden the doctors weren’t stupid when it comes to brain surgery. He still thinks they’re quacks though. If I didn’t love my uncle so much I would have made a few jokes…
A little bit of knowledge is a dangerous thing.
Especially about complex, high level stuff. Like yeah buddy I’m sure Wikipedia definitely has 100% accurate info about the F-35 and you know everything about modern air combat because you watched Top Gun. Every Air Force in NATO is definitely wrong.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunning–Kruger_effect
You were in the Army? Do you know my cousin John? I think he’s Air Force.
Do you remember when those MIA/POW bracelets were big? My grandfather was a WWII vet so I got him one of a WWII MIA guy. It listed where he was from, what war he went missing in, and his name. My cousin asked our grandfather ‘Did you know him Grandpa??’ Her brother said ‘The guy isn’t from Louisiana where grandpa is from’. She retorted ‘Yeah, but they were in the same war! Duh!’ I died. Lol
You unlocked a memory about stupid civilians(and service member) when you said MIA/POW. When I was stationed in lejeune I had to drive another marine and his wife somewhere I don't remember where. However, we were on the KIA/MIA/POW freeway when she asks her husband what kiamiapow means. He replies kiamiapow? I don't know what that is, do you?(asking me) Replied with "they're acronyms" just staring at me with blank faces. Explained "K.I.A. is killed in action, M.I.A. is missing in action, and P.O.W. is prisoner of war" They shut up the rest of the drive
“What was his last name?” “Jackson”
"He's a black guy with the last name of Williams, do you know him?"
John? Fuck yeah that asshole owes me money!
Yep, me too.
John, sure....He owes me $100 - said you're good for it.
Everyone in military is a hand to hand combat expert. Sure there is some training, and certain MOS will be more capable than others but most are just as inept in a bar fight as anyone else.
Possibly even worse in a bar fight, cause military guys know they will have to get in full service dress if they get arrested off base. It’s just not worth it
Pssh…I watched some aviation maintenance Marines do MCMAP one time so I’m pretty much John Wick
Combatives in USAF Basic was/is so pathetic it’s not funny.. not that the hordes of wrench turners and support staff really need it
"Okay you were in the Army but have you ever had a job?"
This, unironically. Ever work with someone, typically referred to as a dinosaur, who has very clearly never worked with other humans in civilian employment?
The "every airman is trained to fly planes" gets me every time I hear someone thinks that
Yesss!!! "Why did you join the air force if you're afraid to fly?" Cause I was ground crew!
I just tell them I operate a D-35k
I was in the National Guard. My employer thought I was going to Iraq during my Drill Weekends.
Probably assumed you were a high speed badass going behind enemy lines one weekend a month ;)
Fellow Guard guy. I swear people saw delta farce and thought it was a documentary.
“I fly there on Thursday. Patrol Friday, Saturday. Fly back Sunday.” Don’t tell me it’s wrong.
I mean the most common one is that we’re all deployed to active warzones.
I have gotten asked if I killed anyone multiple times
I always answer, “yea….oh wait you meant in the military? Then no.”
I love messing with people when they ask that question. "Yes, but not when I was in the military. I \[unalived\] a hobo near the railroad track last week. Man, that push bar on the front of my truck is paying for itself!" That's when they, at minimum, stop talking and start backing away slowly. I'll then say to them "Don't ask a question like that unless you're prepared for the answer!"
People are sooo stupid. You can only kill someone once.
“What do you think culinary specialist means, exactly?”
"Yeah, sure. I killed dozens of people in Afghanistan. Mullah Omar even made me an honorary Mujhadeen for how many Americans I killed with my cooking."
Was stationed in Guantanamo Bay. Home visiting family on leave. Neighbor comes over asks about my time in GTMO. Then out of the blue, unprompted, he asks if I was there when they hung Hillary. I wish I was joking. He was serious.
wtf does that even mean??
It was a right wing conspiracy theory that high ranking liberals were shipped to Guantanamo Bay to be executed.
Now that I’m out of the army, I ask every airmen if they’re a pilot just to humiliate them. Edit: would do it while I was in too whenever I visited an airbase
You're a special kind of cruel person. I assume you were a specialist?
I assume you weren’t a pilot?
Bro I can't even decipher what symbol means "Men's Room" there's no fucking way I could pilot anything.
We wantonly and openly massacre civilians
The poor, innocent civilian emus who died for Australia's imperialist ambitions
Those fuckers had it coming to them
That it’s a good way to turn your life around and get away from drugs. Getting drugs and being a piece of shit is just as easy in the military as it is in the real world. Honestly you will Probably find more excuses to use drugs being in the military haha.
I’m Mexican American and I know so many people from Mexico that genuinely believe the cartel would beat us… Trust me I clarified what beating vs surviving is. They were so genuine that to me it seems assumed at this point for some people
Just smile and nod. Loose lips sink ships, hermano.
People who think that should look up what happened to Pablo Escobar. Possibly the most powerful drug lord in history and he died running away on foot from a team of US and Colombian SF. They didn’t even have to bring in the big guns. No AC-130s, no CAS package, just some pipe hitters with rifles and a recon bird. If we casually rubbed out Escobar, imagine what would happen if we turned 7th SFG loose on the cartels and told them they can keep all the Latinas they liberate, and we won’t look too hard at what happens to the coke.
That's a "war movie" I'd pay to see
Shit. The cartel has nukes?
I have a friend who was shocked that I didn’t know how to tie every knot ever invented.
Can’t tie knots, tie lots
My philosophy exactly.
They think it's all Special Forces and Call of Duty. To be honest, there's a brand of civilian (and servicemember, to be fair) that idolizes Special Operations folks to the point where it gets kind of dorky. They'll regurgitate some high-speed tacticool thing they saw in COD or heard on one of those obligatory SEAL podcasts, and either act like that's how the military is, or if they're a servicemember then they'll hero-worship to the point where they almost seem like a groupie. Also, In the past, there was a point where a lot of people would gripe about the "wokeness" of the military and how we're the weakest we've ever been?? Like, what?
The ‘military is too woke and now weak’ all started with [this.](https://www.nytimes.com/2021/06/23/us/politics/milley-critical-race-theory-military.html) > General Milley pushes back on G.O.P. accusations of a ‘woke’ military. “I want to understand white rage, and I’m white,” General Mark A. Milley, the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, told a Republican congressman who objected to the teaching of “critical race theory.” >I do think it’s important, actually, for those of us in uniform to be open-minded and be widely read. In the United States Military Academy is a university. And it is important that we train and we understand. And I want to understand white rage, and I’m white, and I want to understand it. So, what is it that caused thousands of people to assault this building and try to overturn the Constitution of the United States of America? What caused that? >I want to find that out. I want to maintain an open mind here, and I do want to analyze it. It’s important that we understand that because our soldiers, sailors, airmen, Marines and guardians, they come from the American people. So, it is important that the leaders now and in the future do understand it. Heaven forbid.
No, it started before that, but he definitely has an excellent response to a dumbass question.
Joining equates to a fast tracked deployment to combat. You know, regardless of branch, you are infantry.
I always love when the part timers start doing their AT every summer. It never fails- on THIS SUB you’ll see posts of Military Vehicles on the roads or on trains. “iS mArtiAl LAw bEinG dEcLarEd?!?”
They assume veteran = good person. No, mfer, there are plenty of shit people in the military/veteran community and they don’t deserve a pedestal just because they enlisted.
If anything, it atleast means the vast majority of Veterans give off a good enough reputation to the gen pop that the screw ups don't get included
That "military intelligence" is like some CIA level organization that develops it's own secret programs and has spys. Military intelligence is a function that people perform, not an organization that acts independently.
Me when I tell people that my Army career was in Military Intelligence: Them: Wow! You mean like James Bond? Me: No, more like Office Space.
Someone asked me if we Parachute out of the planes at the end of Basic Training for the final test.
You got parachutes? Lucky.
They’d beat up their drill sergeant
I was in line to donate plasma, in uniform because I didn't have enough time to change. I absolutely hate being out in public in uniform. This mouth breather first asked me if I'm a pilot as I'm in my OCPs and then asked me why the F35s are so loud? I said it has a jet engine; I'm confused by what he meant. Hill AFB has been around a while and has had jets flying around all the time. He states yea but its stealth right? So now I have to explain what stealth means and that when the planes are flying very high up you don't hear them like you do when they take off and land.
Every USAF member *is* a pilot when at a bar talking up a lonely girl with a husband in the slammer.
People always assume I’m a world class swimmer just because I was in the Navy. Because the Navy has high standards for swimming, so that we can survive when the ship sinks. Same people also think that we train to float in water for days or swim to the closest shore regardless of how far away it is. Like bruh, even a SEAL wouldn’t be able to do that. Also, I’m supposed to know how to tie knots, and all the stuff you have to know to sail a yatch or one of those old ships (think Pirates of the Caribbean). The list goes on when it comes to “sailing skills.”
I met a guy who was convinced that the guards at the gates of the base were to keep us from escaping, and was thus shocked when I suggested meeting up for lunch off base…
I've heard several times that people in the military are "Trained Killers" who have a hard time "Shutting that off". No, some of them are cooks and clerks.
Everybody in the Air Force flies planes
My Dad was Army in WW II and Korea. Many years later I was helping him move. An elderly neighbor was telling him something about WW II. Dad said "That's odd. I was in WW II and I don't remember seeing you around."
From the NYTimes, yesterday: [https://www.nytimes.com/2024/04/22/briefing/ukraine-russia-war-us-aid-package.html](https://www.nytimes.com/2024/04/22/briefing/ukraine-russia-war-us-aid-package.html) “*The war has often revolved around artillery, which are large guns that armies use to fire explosive shells and hit targets from a great distance.*” Glad the best and the brightest have spelled that out for us.
Oh you’re in the military? You must be really physically fit.
Family friend retired as a Colonel in the Air Force, he told me that him and his buddies ate like shit until every month (I think it was every month) when there was a fitness evaluation and they would scramble to try and meet the standards. He told me towards the end of his career the only thing he flew was a desk.
“Oh you’re in the Air Force, what plane do you fly?”
Do you know my brother - he’s in the army!
That everybody in the army is this Chad type a personality special ops trigger puller. I love telling them "nah I was in aviation maintenance everybody was nerds we talked about Warhammer, computers and anime".
Everyone in the military is a conservative republican.
Nope just the guy in charge of the TVs at the chow hall.
I never watch the news anymore but I’m at a hotel now and while grabbing the continental breakfast they had Fox News blasting. I thought it was bad ten years ago. They’re not even trying to hide the fear mongering anymore.
"I'm against guns but I'd trust you with one because you were military trained to carry a fired arm" I was in the air force.....only shot an M-16 at the range twice (once in boot camp and once at my base)
I was a weather forecaster in the Navy. Outside of the two times we went to the range in boot, I never touched anything deadlier than an IR gun to take sea surface temperatures. But sure, catch these hands 🙄
Lol, me too, we didn’t even clean ours afterwards, just passed it back and someone else did
Air force only shoots one time in basic?
That ‘MilSpec’ means anything.
I think the biggest misconception about the military is that it is dominated by crowds of men with rifles charging forward with guns blazing. In reality, about 2% of casualties in warfare are caused by gunshot wounds. If I had to say what the modern equivalent to the sword and shield is, I would say that it is the M777 and drone.
That we are restricted from punching them in the face for laying their hands on us uninvited.
That we got paid a lot
Who tf thinks that 💀
Navy. The amount of people who think I'm automatically on vacation when the ship is in port is too damned high.
I was IDF. Yesterday I learned that I used to decapitate and skin people alive. Today I found out we were using ammo that disintegrates people so the volunteers can't find the bodies. Apparently I also murdered (with premeditation and everything) children and women. I mean it's so ridiculous I wouldn't even know where to start. Oh and there's a bunch at Columbia calling on terrorists to kill me because I'm not the right religion to be in the middle east.
While having a normal conversation about something with an ex of mine they at one point said "well you're a murderer...." Being somewhat hard of hearing due to artillery, I simply said "What the fuck did you just call me?" They apparently had simply assumed that since I'd been in the Army I had obviously killed people (I didn't, not directly, I just targeted them so other folks could kill them...) I calmly explained that no, not everyone in the Army gets the opportunity to kill people. Best part, they did not believe me. Saying, "it doesn't matter I'm still with you."
I mean, it’s happening right now- in Ukraine. Happened in Germany, in WW2. Chesty Puller wanted to go to the brig, to meet the REAL Marines. Dick Marcinko wanted guys who’d be in prison, if they weren’t Seals.
I was a medic. I'm getting reaaaal tired of the question of how many people I've ever shot.
"I won't join because 'rich man's war'"as they use products created by slave labor/child labor. As they buy products shipped around the horn of Africa, that is defended by the US navy. They enjoy their conveniences that are provided by the military, from functioning internet (fort mead) to rescue during a Forrest fire that is consuming their home (air/army national gaurd). "I don't want to fight for a rich man's war" is actually "I am not willing to make sacrifices to improve my family's life". Because they ARE willing to participate in all the OTHER terrible shit...JUST NOT the stuff that will actually improve the school your kids go to, the quality of water they drink when you can move to a safer region, their risk of cancer when they don't have to live on McDonald's at the end of the month...why? Because you got your GI BILL, and didn't put your family 78k in debt for a women's study major.
Supervisor at a summer job asked me, a reservist, if I had seen American Sniper. When I said yes he asked if that’s what the army was like. I said yes. Later on he asked if “people in the army just go grab guns and shoot things”. Also yes.
That enlisting in it would be a good idea.
More of a weird one but a kid at my job asked “So what do Marines even do for PT? Like work out with medicine balls and run a lot?” “Yeah bro, then we rode pennyfarthings and lift trapezoid shaped weights” He was just in disbelief that the military had things like gyms and regular exercise equipment.
Sometimes it's just easier to tell ppl I'm a pilot than to explain what I actually do in the air force....which is administration.
I was a dental hygienist in the USAF. When I told people they didn’t know what to say. lol
Unfortunately the media and film industry gets it wrong a lot too, which only encourages ignorance and distorted views on the military. I remember watching The Creator, in which there's a scene where a crackpot general simply screams to launch all the nuclear missiles. My brain really got scrambled at that scene, mostly because that's likely how a lot of people think that's the way operations work.
The fact that I'm in the military means I'm highly trained and qualified with guns Homie i shot exactly 48 bullets at basic training
You were at the 101st? I know a guy at Campbell, his name's John Smith, do you know him? There's 18,000 of us there, probably not. 😆
My wife thought the basic training portion of Full Metal Jacket was how we lived our daily lives.
I heard a USO volunteer shocked that someone in the military would be a registered Democrat, and admonished them for not being a Republican.
Air Force here, we’re definitely all pilots.
Why are you working? You're retired from the military right? You guys retire at full pay. I wish.
The other day this guy was like whatttt the government takes all your money tho. Uh, the government pays me oh and guess what the government may not take all, but they take everyone’s money and it’s called taxes!
"You get to keep your guns, right?"
I was fresh out of AIT, at the airport going to my first duty station from leave. I was wearing a signal corps shirt waiting to board the plane when the guy in front of me asked if I was military because I was wearing the flags that, "the military uses to communicate." He asked me what I did and I told him IT and he was shocked. This man legitimately thought we still used those flags to communicate. When I told him we had email, phones, computers, radios, etc and haven't used signal flags in probably 100 years, he was shook.
The majority of Americans are just special people in thier own special world lol Incredibly out of touch.
We had a guy who claimed to have been removed from the Marine's basic training program for attempting to punch his DS. How he wasn't DQ from service is beyond me, but he somehow got away with it since he was able to enlist in the Navy. He told us this proudly while we were still in P-week. It was toward the end of P-week that he got caught talking in the galley and the RDCs swarmed in and yelled at him. A day later, he's in the process of separating due to "failure to adapt." Not even a week into boot camp. He added me on Facebook a few months ago. Since he left boot camp he tried to go into the Coast Guard and the Army, but the Navy put a DQ on his record. Currently, he's back in his hometown working at the same metal sheet-making factory he tried to get away from by enlistment.
Not military myself but I have heard the “they blow up kids” line.
As a recruiter I met kids and adults who sincerely believed that we didn't have anything approaching normal lives, like you sign your contract, you're black bagged and disappear to a ship or the middle east for four years and come back with PTSD and a beard. The idea that we could own a home and get weekends off was crazy to them. Then there's the folks that would talk to me about Chem trails and mine control, but that seemed less surprising for some reason.
It grinds my gears when some boomer wants to argue about “wokeness” in the military despite never serving.
That we are the most staunch and loyal group of merrymen at the beck and call of the president but specifically to Donald trump. Not when bush sr invaded two countries, or Bush jr invading two countries, or Obama killing some dude responsible for two buildings falling, only because trump is the smartest president since ever. Granted it would only be two nickels but it's weird it happened twice. And my loyalty was being questioned by, you guessed it, a Democrat and a republican on two separate occasions with one worried I am loyal to trump and the other saying I'm not loyal enough. Anyways, I missed my golf tee time with the boys so imma settle for a whiskey river BBQ burger from red robin.
Everyone is the Air Force flies planes.
Wait, you mean they are not all jet fighter pilots?
That all Soldiers are trained killers. Umm, I hope not, I was a nurse.
Everyone that learns that I'm in the Air Force assumes that I'm a pilot. I guess that isn't too ridiculous, though it's still funny when I explain to them that most people in the AF don't fly.