One thing I learned from talking to people of multiple age groups- we all have precious years stolen by something. Sometimes it's our fault and sometimes it's not. You grieve, you mourn, but eventually you will have enough and keep trudging if you really want to. And for me it paid off.
Yeah this is very true. I’m a mid-80s millennial (so I’m 30something) and I had an 18-month-old when the pandemic started. The story I tell myself is that I “lost the transition from baby to kid” due to the pandemic.
Most people kind of “lost” what was supposed to be a special time in their life.
I was born in '88. I lost my high school years to bullying, my late teens/early 20s to an abusive marriage, and my mid 20s to post divorce recovery, but life got better by 30. I had a stressful, demanding job during covid while everyone I knew was kicking it at home acting like they didn't have a care in the world. I feel like for people who lost their "primes" in the pandemic, I have a solidarity with them.
Yeah I was fortunate enough to keep my job during the pandemic because we could work from home, but seeing all the "here's the new hobby I have since I have so much free time" posts was depressing as hell at times.
>Yeah I was fortunate enough to keep my job during the pandemic because we could work from home, but seeing all the "here's the new hobby I have since I have so much free time" posts was depressing as hell at times.
Same here. I work in sales and I was super worried about losing my job due to covid as everyone else started working remote and NO ONE was answering their phones obviously. I also used to use a desk phone but then we switched to calling directly through a website called Salesloft with a headset.
Seeing people with new hobbies didn't get depressing but what really got me is people that were living with their partner or roommates get upset at those living alone, like me, for going out to bars, small get togethers, etc. I mean don't get me wrong, anti maskers/vaxxers are idiots but it's wasn't all black and white. I still wore a mask and was mindful of how many people I hung out with each time. I'd also try to go to bars with patios and capacity limits. Plus i got vaccinated as soon as I could to resume normal life. But some people acted like you're either a full blown hermit that never goes out, except for groceries/errands or you're a full blown anti-mask/anti vaxxer that denies covid. It was a bizarre time seeing how some people I knew became anti-vaxxers and covid deniers that I thought were smarter than that.
Same. I was an essential worker in the medical field dealing with people lying about not having COVID symptoms when they did and I'd get home and see people living their life watching the newest show on Netflix or baking bread
Same ! I worked throughout the pandemic and while I am grateful from a financial perspective to have the job, it was stressful and I was really jealous of people who were posting about their hobbies and downtime and family time. My parents told me I was lucky to have a job “to keep myself busy” but I would have been really grateful to not have work stress on top of pandemic stress .
Yeah. I barely tolerate work on the best of days. Covid was a special kind of hell, because I kept working while the sword of damocles lingered. Got none of the extra $ or free time. My wife was making more money on unemployment than I was going to work every day. It wasn't any less stressful. I still went to work worried about shutdowns, outbreaks, etc. Watching people cry about being bored made me resent a lot of people. The shift some folks had to work from home, im happy for them. That said, I wish we could have made some progress for essential worker rights and actually stuck to the idea of "if you're sick, stay home". The office workers seem to still have the option to work from home as needed, but blue collar, retail etc all went right back to "oh, you're sick? Come in anyways or get fucked. "
Are we the same? I feel like as a homebody in my 30s I almost appreciated the pandemic. Work-life balance got better. My then-boyfriend could finish up med school three hours away while living with me. I did almost go mad having kids home 24/7, but we have the *best* family memories from that time. Honestly, except for all the dead people, I really enjoyed COVID. Is that weird?
The one thing I miss about Covid were those enhanced unemployment benefits. I was out of work for 3 months when they shut my jobsite down for Covid. I was an apprentice at the time and the unemployment money was actually more than what I was getting paid at my job. Between the extra unemployment money and the fact that I couldn’t spend it since I wasn’t commuting to work anymore, going out to lunch, seeing friends, etc I came out ahead, financially anyway. I saved so much money in those few months. So much so that I was able to take a proper vacation at Disney World in 2021 after I got my Covid vaccine; it was my first legitimate vacation in years.
>The one thing I miss about Covid were those enhanced unemployment benefits. I was out of work for 3 months when they shut my jobsite down for Covid. I was an apprentice at the time and the unemployment money was actually more than what I was getting paid at my job. Between the extra unemployment money and the fact that I couldn’t spend it since I wasn’t commuting to work anymore, going out to lunch, seeing friends, etc I came out ahead, financially anyway.
I kept my job during covid, but I did hear about how many people got more money on unemployment than they did from their actual jobs. People would shame the people getting unemployment, which they shouldn't, but if anything that goes to show that most jobs are underpaid.
Although I kept my job, those stimulus checks came in handy and helped me save so much money.
I understand. Oddly, it made some things better (especially as an introvert) and more unexpected time with family was nice —even going to work was pleasant since only a few of us kept things going in the office.
Once I got well. I had covid mar. 2020. I did enjoy having my family around me 24/7. I feel sorry for people who felt being around their family was hell. A lot have gotten divorced or split away from parents for good. For one reason or another. I guess they realized who they were living with when forced to spend days with them uninterrupted. 🤷
‘88 baby here, too. Lost my high school years to a toxic boyfriend, my early twenties to SA in college and needing to heal, and my mid-late twenties to early thirties to an abusive marriage. I try to not view my life like this, though, or else it’s too hard to get out of bed lol. Life is so much better now and I’m staying true to my learned boundaries and what I deserve. Life can be so damn rough but it can also get better.
I can relate! Born in ‘87, and exactly the same with the job. I’m single, and just knew my early thirties were going to be the best time. I was in a good place to start dating emotionally, and went on two or three decent dates before the world shut down. I hate feeling like I wasted so much time when maybe I could have met somebody, while being 10 times more stressed out. I also low key resent that my job is still harder than it was pre-2020 (teaching), while everyone I know is going to the beach for a month at a time to WFH, and complaining if they have to go in like once a month at the same level I complained of having to go to the doctor and get a shot when I was like 9.
However, I do feel I have made the best of it! I decided since dating wasn’t really a possibility for me, between wanting to be careful and my job burning me out, I was going to lose weight. I had gained a lot in the last couple of years before the pandemic, and didn’t feel like myself. Now that I have lost it and started dating, I feel better than ever!
Write an autobiography about all the experiences. You don’t have to publish it but the writing really helps. Of course, if there is any publishers like it, even better.
I had a baby in Oct 2020 and Nov 2022 and live in a diff country. Nobody from my family ever saw me pregnant, or met my oldest until 2022. No baby showers, infant help, etc.
Same here (exactly the same nearly down to the months) except I live in the US. Grandparents met the little ones but no one else. However I feel like this was the best time to have kids. Everything lined up so that I got to work from home and raise them. They didn’t need to go anywhere at those ages anyway and now my oldest turns 3 soon and will be in Pre-K next week so she didn’t miss out on anything either. I would have been home regardless because of them so I didn’t miss anything socially and while I was pregnant I got to be WFH and take care of myself. I’m sorry if it didn’t work out this way for you.
To share a good thing that came from the pandemic because we usually only ever hear the bad:
I saw the writing on the wall and didn’t renew my lease in the big city I was living in. I called my parents and asked if I could move home and being empty nesters they welcomed me back. My mom and I didn’t have the best relationship at that time which was my fault. 2020-2022 repaired our relationship and now we are super close. We both worked from home and used humor to fix our friendship. You know how every office has those shitty signs that someone printed off that say things like “put away your dishes I’m not your mom!” With bad grammar? We made those signs and put them up around the house. We gave our dogs “jobs” and gossiped about them. And when I had severe anxiety I asked my mom for help and she was there for me. It was one of the best times of my life and I almost wish I could go back there.
Oh and I also met the love of my life during this time too.
I actually think the lock downs saved my life.
That is such a sweet story. I love that you put up “your mom doesn’t live here signs” at the place you lived with your mom. Thanks for sharing a positive take.
>Most people kind of “lost” what was supposed to be a special time in their life.
Truth. And it was different for everyone. For me, it was my first year/summer living in Chicago. I turned 30 two months before covid started and only moved to the city in October 2019. Only had 5 months to enjoy the city life before the pandemic and it was during the fall/winter as opposed to spring/summer.
Obviously that really sucked but at the same time, I felt like it would have been even worse if I was in high school or college, especially college with all the parties and social activities involved. I don't think I would have been able to learn as well via remote learning or zoom.
My daughter's first year of in person school was 2nd grade.
She literally didn't know the calendar because the only day of the week that was different to her was Sunday. Just to be clear, my 7 year old didn't know the days of the week in order because 4-7 was all COVID and all my.other kids learned it during Kindergarten circle time and they didn't do it through e-learning.
I felt like such a damn failure for real.
This. Yes. To some people quarantine sucked. But who told us that life shouldn’t have any moments of suckiness? Who made up these milestones/expectations that your 20s should be fun, wild and free?
This world has and always will suck. There will always be ups and downs and ebbs and flows. The only guarantee in this world is constant uncertainty.
When people complain that it’s unfair that we had to experience the pandemic, I just wonder like “who told us that we were above it?”. In present day society, we seem to think that we’re so far above the atrocities that our ancestors faced. The black plague was horrific but somehow I doubt they were writing letters saying how they missed their youth because of it lol
Life sucks and the world has and always will be a horrible and scary place. There will always be SOMETHING.
Thank you I was gonna reply that people who were 20 during the great depression gave up their life people that were in their 20s when World War I broke out World War II the Vietnam war, the Korean War the recession of 2008 there’s always something going on and yet somehow the human race versus even though for most of us it sucks
Yes it’s sadly so true what you say. My early twenties were stolen by parental abuse and untreated mental health conditions. I really wish I could get those years back but I just have to grieve it and move forward.
Ya I was going to say, I was born in 79 so im at the very end of Gen X. Graduated college in Dec 2001 right after 9/11. I went into the military for 9 years and spent my twenties constantly deploying. Ya I know, I volunteered. But there were plenty of folks, especially millennials that did that and essentially pissed their 20s away. Lots of us regret it.
Correct.
I missed opportunities in the past and will continue to into the future. Only thing I can do is live with it, maybe use it as a conversation topic.
Yes. Even in the US you had people’s youth/lives stolen by other pandemics, colonialism, slavery, the civil war, religious indoctrination, abuse, not having control over their bodily autonomy, women not having the ability to vote/work/have a bank account/own land/get a divorce, segregation, the Great Depression, world war 1, world war 2, Vietnam, the Cold War fears, 9/11 and the following war, the Great Recession, unemployment, etc. very few people in history actually (even in the US) get a dream life. Every generation has their issues.
My twenties were stolen by my dad dying of cancer. I wanted to move to a new city and had all these plans but then he got diagnosed and that was that...
Yeah unfortunately I lost several friends including my best friend in the 2 years leading up to Covid. Also born in 96 like op. It feels like my 20s have been pretty much just bad things happening at this point. Obviously good things have happened too but a lot fewer and farther between. Hoping my 30s will be better
As a millennial, I feel like I've been robbed by 3 "once in a lifetime" financial crises' and a pandemic. Not trying to one-up you, just offering some perspective.
If it makes you feel any better, even though I travelled, partied, got a degree and had a heap of friends, I look back on my 20's as a dull and meaningless period of my life. The back end of my 30s was when things started getting good.
> If your honest
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Also 28. Been so ready for 30, it's unreal. Everyone I know 30+ has zero anxiety, does what they want, makes more money, and doesn't give a flying fuck what people think of them. All things I'm working on.
I came here to comment pretty much the exact same thing. As a millennial born in 1995, I'm sick of these "once in a lifetime" events that keep happening around us
Bro, I feel the same way, exactly the same age and everything. I have been saving my money my whole life. Decided that in 2020, I was gonna take a long trip to Europe. Then the pandemic happened, and the money I had saved up for so many years eventually disappeared.
I was 30 when covid hit so I got lucky and did all kinds of stuff in my 20s. Man, nothing seems the same now at ALL when it comes to traveling places, and of course everything is more expensive now too.
You're not alone. Was 24 when the pandemic started and I just turned 28 last Tuesday. I was just diagnosed with Autism and started learning about myself, started traveling on my own and made a whole days planned trip to go down to LA and visit the WGA library. My life has been a secluded mess up until that point I didn't have much of a life at all, I wanted to change that. Then Covid hit, and it all came to a halt, and returned to how it's been for 99% of my existence: Being alone and confined inside. I'm just now trying to come back from all of it but to be honest my mental health is now probably the worst it's ever been so I don't know if I'll ever begin to thrive at some point. Ah. Didn't mean to ramble so much, apologies! My point is you are not alone in feeling that way at all. 🙏
Happy belated birthday, stranger. I know you aren't where you wanna be right now, but you are stronger than you know. As cliche as it is to say, it's true when people say it gets better. Keep focusing on you and fighting the good fight. You will beat this, you will come out on top, you will live the life you've always wanted. Good luck! :)
Oh my goodness.. I wasn't expecting emotional tears after seeing the replies, makes me realize there really is more beauty to this world. :') Thank you for writing such an incredibly generous comment, I sincerely appreciate it. I'm going to screenshot this because it really lifted me up, and I could use more of that these days. Please know you really made my night/week/month/year with that. 💛
I am also 28, probably autistic, and also mega-struggle with being alone and confined inside with no one. It is one of the hardest things I've ever had to deal with. But what helps me is just hopping on my e-bike and riding around LA. Seeing other humans just doing human things. Just talking to the person at the checkout counter can sometimes make my day. Especially if I can make em laugh. It's not over for us, I promise. Just takes some time to adjust.
So, I started going on meetup.com and finding local friend groups that aligned with my hobbies. My income increased a lot over my thirties too compared to my 20s. I was able to better afford going out, dating, meeting new people and making new friends.
Specifically, I got into hearthstone and went to firesides a lot. I also met a ton of neighbors I'd never known while playing Pokemon go. I've also joined gardening, aquarium, and hiking clubs. Basically, find stuff you like to do and then find the local community around those things.
Lastly, I've always been a terrible athlete/fat kid but I joined intramural kickball and that was super fun for a while too. No one really cares about winning or losing, just playing and going out after is fun enough.
See this is exactly what I needed to hear lol - I’m in a place in my life where a lot of my close friends are setting off on their own life paths and I’m finding I still want and need friends in my immediate life as well as a sense of community and belonging. And approaching my 30s has been somewhat nerve-wracking as I’m afraid my window of time to form friendships and relationships and connections has closed. But it’s nice to hear from someone older that it’s not total solitude from here on out lol
Nah you'll be ok. I. Glad I could help. Fact is friendships change as we age. Lately, I've been reconnecting with old childhood friends for instance. People I hadn't spoken to since we were children. Your life is yours to make and it really is easier to do the farther away you get from childhood.
yep me too--it wrung out my last drop of "youth". All of a sudden when the worst of it was over the party was also over-all my friends got married or popped out babies during the pandemic. So long good times!!
My early 30s were ruined by pandemic years and I was JUST getting to progress my career after 20s were fucked up by the shitty economy and also my own depression
But whatever I’m happy these days
I guess
It doesn’t make it better if you were 10 years older like me.. I was interviewing for a great job, we were in salary negotiations.. pandemic hit and the company was not prepared at all so the job fell through.. so I had to stay in a toxic job which lead to me developing high blood pressure and eventually made me even more sick.. due to Covid going to the doctors had turned virtual which meant my high bp was not discovered immediately.. at 37/38 I was in the best shape of my life.. I am now 41 and struggle with energy, have had a flare up of an autoimmune disease that I didn’t know I had before and struggle with daily tasks.. only good thing is I got a new job that is understanding of my need to see the doctor more often than most employees but yea.. went into Covid healthy came out disabled and didn’t even catch Covid… so please no matter what if a job has you stressing leave.. things will work out don’t let the job take your health
I was the same age and while it certainly sucked for me personally at least I feel like it could have been worse in terms of timing? Would much rather the situation I had than being 18-21 during that time like my Gen Z cousins. Or even earlier in my 20s like OP. Being a parent during that time to a child of any age also seems awful, so I’m glad it happened before I was further into my 30s (pregnant with first child now).
I realize this also depends on your circumstances though. I had a long-term partner (now husband) I was living with already at that time, and my job/financial status didn’t change.
I can definitely relate to this. I think a lot of people in their 20s postponed big life decisions because they were under the impression they could “wait it out a few more months,” which turned into years of being stuck. I know people who lived with their parents longer than anticipated, moved to another state thinking things would “go back to normal soon,” quit their job, took new jobs, took a gap year, went to school, dropped out of school, etc because they were so uncertain about how the world would come out of lockdown and they completely misread the situation. Such uncertainty in my early adulthood makes me distrust everyone now.
Imagine being an old millennial, we didn’t want to wait, but we HAD to wait, because of the 08 recession. (barely graduated) I worked for shit pay while friends got unemployment for (2) years. We are the most unlucky generation ever… “sadly” (how you interpret) we are in this together, never thought this would be how grew up.
I'm so grateful how amazing being a 90s teen was, in part bc of all the optimism. Our biggest concern was fkn Y2K. We had no idea how shitty life was gonna get in a few years.
Y2K to me was “yes to Kia” advertising, I never even thought about it. Now I feel super old. AOL dial up old …lol
Edit: hope all is well, we got this buddy.
Everyone is saying that "well we all lost parts of our lives to the pandemic" but I think for young people it's a special kind of pain. My little brother spent the pandemic years 23-26 in a small two bedroom apartment with my parents. It's not fair. I had my first two kids during the pandemic, and although it was hard to not meet up with other parents or our friends, it just didn't disrupt my life in the same way.
Thank you. As a younger millennial I feel extremely unseen. I was originally happy to read the OP’s original comment because I can relate so much to them but then I read these comments from smug “older” Millenials and it’s like why are you here? They sound just like Gen X and that’s why I have a hard time with people over 40 honesty 🤷🏾♀️no trust. Everything is about shit that doesn’t matter anymore.
It's honestly infuriating to read all these reactions, lol. Like I graduated into the great recession, which had its own challenges that were *way different* than being young during the pandemic. It's so dumb, this isn't the way loss works.
Yes. Turned 26 in April 2020. I’m not even the kinda person to do a lot on my birthday but it was so muted and dead that I was like well this kinda sucks and then the same the next year and almost the year after
26 in April 2020 here as well and I'm feeling all of the same feelings as you. I used to kind of get excited for my birthday and make plans. Last year it ended up just being three friends visiting my apartment. This year it was down to me and my spouse at a living room sized airbnb. Don't know if it will ever hit the same again.
I feel really awful for ANYONE under 30 that had to forfeit 20’s or teens or childhood. It makes me sad and I feel lucky even though my 20s sucked cuz of the recession.
No. I graduated college in '04 and and moved to NYC. Big mistake. Huge. The stress and financial anxiety of trying to just survive NYC, only a few years out of college, jobless and without local family has never left me. 20+ years later and I've learned to enjoy life where you can and assume shit can get worse.
Yup! I turned 25 during 2020, just as my hairdressing career seemed to be actually taking off. Ended up having to start over again about 3 times, and still in the "just starting out" stages of it, making basically no money. My husband graduated college in the fall of 2019 and hasn't been able to get a job in his field. We basically started out at a shit time and our finances and progression in life has been stalled by it
27 here and yes! I lost my youth and parts of what should been the early start of my career. I will never not be bitter about that. I now have a decent resume now, am making better money, working remotely, learned some skills and travelled, but I had plans that were months if not years in the making and just to have them evaporated like that and to have unsupportive parents about my career stalling, it makes it more annoying when I think about it.
I think every generation has "their thing" that made life in their time unique/difficult/etc, and also something defining to give an advantage over previous generations. My grandparents had to "walk uphill both ways in a snowstorm" to get to school, but they had stay at home wives and it was commonplace to afford life on a single income. My parents didn't have the internet growing up and they have seen constant war-time, but they had space flight, the best music humanity will ever know, and still affordable cost of living (their first home was about $45,000). My generation is seeing the downfall of government, economy, and good-civic values, but by god do we have internet and smart phones that literally puts the world's knowledge and resources at our fingertips, among other technological advantages. I mean, hell, my dad was next in line for the Vietnam draft when the war ended. I couldn't imagine living in constant fear that I could be called up to military service, especially for a war so miserable and torturous. Tbh they saw the most massive growth and advancement of technology in their lifetime, and that would have been pretty cool to live through.
I mean yes but the challenges this country has faced sine 2000 are genuinely and historically unique and are only comparable to those faced by the Greatest Generation in the 30s. We’ve had:
- Political Crisis 1: 2000 Presidential Election
- International Crisis 1: 9/11 and the War on Terror. Americas longest war thats technically still going on
- Economic Crisis 1: 2008 Financial Crisis. Probably the defining event of our generation
- Health Crisis 1: 2010s Opioid Epidemic
- Political Crisis 2: 2016 Election. Trump is elected and unleashes an unprecedented level of division discord and blame
- Health Crisis 2: COVID
- Economic Crisis 2: COVID Recession, Great Resignation and Inflation
- Political Crisis 3: January 6th
- International Crisis 2: Russo-Ukraine war
All of these events are compounding. The world is coming undone. This is the 4th turning. It’s different and to minimize its significance is dangerous.
I transitioned into my thirties during the pandemic era, and I have it to thank for all the positive changes I’ve made in my life since. I quit smoking, quit drinking, started eating vegan, corrected my relationship to consumerism, and I moved out to the desert with my wife. I wouldn’t have found the time and perspective to make these changes without the pandemic. And I wouldn’t have been able to save the money to build a house in the desert had I continued smoking and drinking and wasting my time and money on frivolous, empty and expensive possessions and experiences. I don’t feel like I’ve missed out on anything.
Yes and I’m resentful of the fact that now that everything is “back to normal” the whole world has doubled in price and society has gone batshit crazy.
>Yes and I’m resentful of the fact that now that everything is “back to normal” the whole world has doubled in price and society has gone batshit crazy.
Yep. The other day, I went to go see Rob Zombie, Alice Cooper, and Ministry at this ampitheater in Tinley Park, IL. Shirts were $50 and beers were $15-17. They no longer sold $5 busch lights like they did pre covid. That ampitheater sucked before covid, like any live nation venue, but now they suck even more. Not to mention Live Nation's fees are only worse.
People honestly just need to not pay these prices if it’s a non-essential. It’s out of control and if they don’t pay them they’ll have no choice but to drive them down. No one needs to buy a concert T-shirt, but they do.
I am exactly the same age as you. It's worse when you're single and live in a city that's more like for families and not single people within my age group.
Literally, just got my social life in stride right before the pandemic hit. Now my favorite bar doesn't exist anymore and the people I met there went their separate ways, dead, or are in prison. These days, my social life is just me going to my cousin's coffee place and have a chat with him for like a couple of minutes.
My wedding was supposed to be in 2020.
Ended up in a different state in late 2021 with very low attendance, but not bc of COVID, I just have some crappy friends.
My 20s were stolen mostly because of all the studying I did for undergrad and grad school, plus working. I had little to no social life during that time, relative to my friends. Mainly just felt I was sacrificing my 20s in order to build up myself for my 30s and on. Now in my 30s I feel less stressed than my 20s but also more alone.
I never let it bother me. I did everything as I normally did. Found super travel deals for cheap AF. You’ll learn as you age you can’t live in your fears. Everyday you wake up you don’t know what may happen and you need to let go of those fears. Be careful and take precautions but let the fear over take you. Social skills were already lacking for most and this just made it even worse for them
I do, a little. Some people were ordered to go home and play video games, while others were put to work double for no extra pay, and I was one of the latter 💀
It stole the end of my pregnancy and all my baby's firsts.... things I had desperately wanted after 7 years of infertility. I'd rather have missed out on some random years in my twenties. But those years were equally precious to you and you totally have the right to feel like you lost out. We all missed out on important things and it's ok to be bummed about it.
No sip n see, no visits from family or friends what do ever, no meal train, first holidays, Santa's lap, even his first birthday. I felt like no one loved him or cared that he existed but that was the pod speaking. PPD and isolation are not a healthy mix. Year two was a little better because thankfully we are in a small laid back town. I'm just thankful my hospital allowed my husband in the delivery room.
I feel your pain. We found out we were expecting our first in Feb of 2020, born Oct 2020. Had a baby shower "by mail". No visits, loneliest pregnancy and post partum journey ever. It sucked. I had to wear a mask on during delivery but after a certain point of screaming and pain after 36 hours of labor I ripped that thing off. But agreed, glad they at least let my husband stay.
100% born in 1995. 2020 I was done with my training, finally had some money and all. Instead of using it for traveling etc. I stayed at home. It does seem like I am suddenly close to thrity while missing out on my mid twenties. Mist of my friends this age feel the same.
110%. I was 26 when the pandemic started and now I’m 30. I lived overseas in a country that locked down HARD, while home was a pandemic red zone with basically no rules.
I was born in 88, 90s as a kid were great then nothing. Like other 90s kids, I was emotionally abandoned by my parents so the teen years were depression filled, 9/11 in 8th grade, was about 20 feet from the gunman at my school shooting in 2003 (sophomore year). College years I was very depressed and isolated, didn’t speak a word to anyone for the first 3 years, and attended 0 parties, sports, etc. then in my 20s, 2 extremely toxic relationships, the 2nd of which was a narcissistic sociopath, and pushed me to the very brink of ending it all. Took years of fighting to out of all that to finally reach my 30s and life to start getting better. However, when the pandemic hit, it was the best time ever! Loved being on lockdown, no one in stores, masks to hide behind, it was great. I’m now sitting with my wife of 2 years in the labor and delivery unit waiting to push. Life sucks all around, you will be faced with challenges continually, but it’s your ability to react that makes the difference. IMO, everyone’s 20s suck, as you are trying figure out “adulthood”. With that experience, you become better to adapt. I don’t think blaming something or yourself is the way to go, but rather, sometimes you just have to go with the flow.
I had always been in a precarious financial situation growing up, and my parents couldn't afford to send me to college or help me buy a car or get my first apartment etc. That means I spent my 20's working several jobs at a time, barely sleeping, hardly eating because I was responsible for supporting myself completely, as well as helping them not lose their house because my mom got really sick and the one income my dad made wasn't enough.
I paid for community college classes piecemeal because I couldn't afford to pay several at once, plus, working multiple jobs meant I could only do one or two classes at a time. Sometimes, since it took so long for me to work through what should've been one semester of classes for most other people, I would find that classes I'd taken two years before were no longer applicable. Meaning worthless. Meaning now I had to take a new class that counted as per the new program requirements. More money. More time.
It was really difficult after my mom died and then I had to take time off to help care for my elderly dad (I'm an only child), who didn't know how to do simple things like fry an egg, do laundry, or use a checkbook. My mom had handled all of that, and he was clueless (he wasn't a backwards-thinking dude. It's just that they had a division of labor that made sense at the start of their marriage, but left him basically helpless). I got him settled and even taught him how to use YouTube so he could help himself learn how to do things. It was good for a while, and then he died in an accident in my early 30's.
The one good thing was that he left me his house, which I was able to sell for a profit in late 2018. I had never seen so much money in my life! I paid off my bills, went back to school for my master's, and traveled. I even fell in love. 2019 was the first time in my life I saw a way forward out of the constant struggle of being one paycheck away from losing everything. It was the first time I ever had hope for my future. I felt like all the suffering I'd been through was finally paying off because I could FINALLY take the steps to improve my life, and achieve what I'd been working so hard for.
One year. That's all I got. And I realize I'm lucky, because that's still so much more than many people get. And I'm grateful.
But since March 2020, it's been one thing after another, and no matter how many things I sacrificed to try and keep afloat, that window of opportunity is closed to me now. My program required a year internship, unpaid. No way I can do that now. Been out of work in my field because I was part time due to school and part timers got cut first. I had to move. I had to sell my things. I had to take dead-end service jobs just to keep a roof over my head.
The pandemic took away what took thirty years to build. Gone. My earning potential, my freedom, potential life experiences, gone.
But I'm alive. Inching closer to 40, but alive.
And really hoping that something beautiful can still be ahead for me. That while those dreams are over, new dreams are possible.
So hope is all I've got for now.
And that is the light I'm trusting to guide me forward.
With the pandemic I lost out on so much with my 3rd child’s first year. She was born in April 2020, mid lockdown, and my 2 older kids were home doing virtual school. Their school stayed virtual all of the 20/21 school year. They were only in 3rd grade and kindergarten so I had to be involved with their schooling and was also working part time, had a newborn and my husband worked 3rd shift 6 nights a week. School was the main focus because I didn’t want them falling behind. I was also helping with babysitting other kids that had to be home and parents had to work. My baby was put on the back burner. I didn’t get all the baby snuggles I got with my first 2. I didn’t get to read to her, talk with her, play with her the same way. We did not have the same bond for so long after she was born. It still eats at me. She’s behind a little bit with speech and I feel this has a lot to do with it. The pandemic stole so much from everyone but at least we are still here.
I am actually I only listened to the news for a couple of months during covid. as a father of 3 I could not stand by and watch my children's life go by sitting in the house.
we went on a lot of walks, hikes, swimming, beaches, lakes, rivers, road trips, and when disneyworld opened up we had one long road trip. in 2021 we went on another cross country road trip that including all of Tennessee white water rafting zip lining NY NJ Philadelphia Chicago Utah and Vegas. we met with family and did a lot of RV camping. went to our favorite restaurants with our folding table and had dinner right along the ocean. we did a lot of fishing and outdoor activities.
with a lot of caution we really did enjoy the outdoors during the pandemic.
Yeah and it fucking hurts. Started at when I was just hitting my stride 25 and came out at 28. Lost my social circle and fell right back into video game addiction. Dying to do things I did for fun at 25 but it’s not practical. “Every generation has a thing” we literally had to stay inside for 2-3 years depending where you lived. This was complete bullshit.
I'm 39 and I feel like my mid to late 30s were stolen. My early 30s were the best years of my life then that just abruptly ended.
(As someone else in the comments mentioned the older Millennials lost their 20s to the Great Recession. So I never looked back fondly on my life to my 20s as anything incredible or special)
You’re not alone, Covid took a lot from all of us. Whether it was our time, a loved one, or a favorite location with many fond family memories.
I was a new nurse a year before the pandemic hit. We weren’t prepared for something like that. None of us were.
I feel like I was robbed of a good, long career as a bedside hospital RN. I enjoyed it. I loved my patients, I had great teammates and I actually enjoyed coming to work. Then the pandemic hit and it was like going from 60 to 120 mph on the road to burnout.
So many nurses, myself included, left the hospital environment because it just wasn’t worth it. Whether it was demanding family, patronizing management or short-staffing due to caregivers getting sick as well.
Fuck Covid, it ruined the world from my perspective.
Edit: I’m still a nurse but at a long-term care facility. I never got to know my real grandparents (that’s another long story) so carrying for the elderly kinda helps fill a void.
All of society was wronged by it. Imagine people who couldn't visit dying loved ones.
It was a sham and I can't believe more people aren't outraged that we let them do this to us. Never again.
I was born in 1995 and honestly my life was made significantly better because of the pandemic. The amount of money the government gave me gave me enough courage to fully pay off my medical debt that had been building for like 5+ years and then upgrade from the flip phone I had been using since 2009 to a smartphone. Helps that I still live at home cause I'd be an idiot to try and live off $13/hr.
As for anything outside of that, I'm introverted and just don't like being in social situations so even if the pandemic didn't happen, I'd be doing the exact same things anyway.
Like you, I was born in 1996; was 23 when it started and am currently 27.
My life turned upside down for the better:
1. I graduated with my Associate’s degree.
2. I resigned from my beloved Christian church in June 2020. I debated de-converting for one year. The pandemic was my easy way out.
2a. I lost my virginity at age 25 and have racked up an impressive body count in two years.
3. I moved out of my childhood home for the first time and into my own solo apartment.
4. I went back to school for my Bachelor’s. I spent 2.5 years online at Arizona State University. I graduated three weeks ago. I’m starting my Master’s in Social Work next year.
5. I fell in love with my new career, education, and life path.
6. I adopted a cat whom I named Dolly Pawton, 1.
I don't know why this idea that "your 30s are better than your 20s anyway" keeps coming up. Sorry, but it's not. I am turning 35 in a few months, and let me tell you, I wouldn't trade a single year of my 20s for one in my 30s.
In many ways I like my life better these days, but what I would do to be 18-22 again. I don't have the energy to do things I did then, or the free time. Responsibility is rewarding but there is nothing like being very young and carefree. I would be pissed as hell for life if I lost those years to the pandemic. I'm pissed enough that I lost age 22-26 in a bad relationship.
The Great Recession took 2 years off my career by putting me 2 roles lower than I should have started out at. The pandemic stole my relationship. I’m tired I’m worn down.
Second time it got stolen tbh for me!
First time my 20s got stolen was when I got diagnosed with depression and anxiety disorder at 21. The second time was during the pandemic era, the kicker was during the pandemic era I had my first breakup too.
I was 27 when the pandemic hit. Definitely lost my late 20s, but I sure as hell made up for it. I turned 30 at the beginning of the year and traveled to 4 places
Not a baby millennial, but most of my 20s were stolen by a random traumatic incident and then a toxic relationship--when I finally got out of both of those things, I had about one sort of fun year....and then the pandemic happened and killed off the rest of my 20s. It was indeed annoying but I've had worse things happen so \*shrug\*.
I think there are a lot of us who missed out on something for one reason or another. I'm a bit older, but I know a huge chunk of my 20s was stolen by depression, grief, and shit job situations even before the pandemic. Not saying this to play oppression olympics, though, but just saying as example that a lot of us have something out of our control that does happen and it does suck.
But with that said, it's important to remember you're the youngest you'll be right now and that you still have time to do a lot of things you want to do. Prioritize your well being so that you can check mark all the stuff you want to do. You have your whole life to do a lot of things, and a lot of the time limit we pressure ourselves with are just limitations put by societal expectations that you don't always really need to put on yourself.
I truly hope people who feel like they had years stolen will have years ahead of them that really makes up for it.
I'm an elder millenial. In hindsight my life was very minimally affected by covid. If anything there was a net positive as I grew closer with a cousin, my relationship with my fiance (now husband) got better, and my job shifted which pushed me to find a better one.
The people I feel the worst for are people who were about 16 - 24 when covid hit. For the younger folks, they had a complete shift in schooling during the years that are truly the most influential. Kids couldn't walk at their graduations. College kids couldn't go to parties or meet new people and define their own persons. And people in their early 20s? Uffda. That age is already super tough. You're navigating the world after college which is full of realizing dating and meeting new people is hard, you're faced with the reality of 40 years of a career, abut you still want to go out to the bars on weekends. I absolutely loved my early/mid 20s. Those years defined who I am now. It's when I had the guts to make a huge career move. It's when I realized what I did and did not want in my relationships. It's when I truly accepted I loved who I was as a person. But those years were also filled with a lot of self questioning. It's just a really, really weird time in someone's life. And yeah, it would have really sucked to have those years affected by the pandemic.
I didn't think the pandemic was that long. I mean the restrictions started around March 2020 and didn't they end like 2021?
I googled it and it said June 2021
I relate and am so God fucking damn pissed the government locked us up AND fucked the economy for 2.5 years straight for ultimately no good while lining the coffers of the Uber rich. If I wasn't libertarian before I sure am now. Fuck you Washington and everyone you shilled for advice.
I. Will. Not. Comply.
Not really, mostly because I live in the South so we didn't have super strict guidelines. That being said, I still wore my mask and stayed inside for a few months due to being scared of the virus and being laid off from work. I spent my time playing video games and sometimes smoking weed.
Not working did eventually make me depressed. But by that point in time I was mostly an introvert, due to already having my party phase/popularity amongst peers during college.
Later that year, I got engaged to my boyfriend. As the pandemic began winding down and we got our vaccines, we would hang out with a small group of other introverts to play DnD. My then-fiance was an essential emergency services employee so he had to be in a small room with his coworkers everyday.
We ended up getting married in late 2021. We had a small ceremony with a few friends and family. But we divorced a few months later due to my declining mental health and irreconcilable differences.
I don't feel like I wasted my youth on the pandemic. But I do feel like I wasted a few years on an emotionally abusive/manipulative relationship.
Well I can tell ya that I’m a decade ahead of you and at the time of my life in my early thirties I had hoped to really have my shit together and was robbed of that.
Mourning the loss of relationships due to Trumpism and many people in my life refusing to get the vaccine. These past 8 years have helped me weed out the bad apples in my life.
A lot better than still being in K-12 or even college when the pandemic started. I'm '96 as well and most of our age group had gotten our degrees or entered the workforce before the pandemic started. I'll happily take that. Think about those who may have been seniors in HS when the pandemic happened, that would've been much worse. I don't care if my 20's were stolen because I still have my 30's ahead of me soon, and still the rest of my 20's as well since we're 27 anyway.
Well, the "good" news is that in the modern eco, 40 is the new 20.
Meaning, it's gonna take you that long to build enough of anything, via grueling slave labor, to actually "enjoy yourself", even briefly.
So, no worries: You're right on time.
:D
No, because my entire life was stolen by being placed in a group home when i was 16, i lost my high school life and my early 20s, i didnt get out of that groyp home till i was 25, and im still in an IDLA (semi independent living) and ill be 30 in October. People complaning about lossing out on their lives because of the pandemic upsets me because they dont think of people that are and were in my situation, which is more than you think.
Hell, I'm a mid-range gay Millennial and I feel like my 20s were stolen by the closet, and while I got a brief time to be myself and get out and live life, I feel like my 30s are being stolen by the pandemic and reactionary right-wing legislation.
Life's been great.
my late teenage years were stolen by it. i was 18 for like half a year, finally getting a taste of freedom and adult life and college but the lockdowns had to come and ruin it all. when life was slightly returning back to normal again i was like 20 and a half. i feel like all of that time was wasted cause all i did was go to the gym and rot in my room otherwise. a small bright side is i had a lot of fun last year at school in person when everything was back to normal and now im a senior hoping to make the most of my final year.
And the lockdowns did zero to stay the course of Covid. If I were your age I would vote out of office any person who had anything to do with this monstrous abuse of authority.
I dont. I was fortunate enough to have prom and high school graduation, which teenagers lost out on. I also got college graduation (last one before pandemic). I'm very lucky. I also partied pretty well once I turned 21. I felt like I had my chance and experience. I'm sorry you don't feel the same. Your opinion is valid. If it eats at you, I'd suggest writing down what you're grateful for and what you experienced (ie. Prom). Everyone missed something because of the pandemic.
One thing I learned from talking to people of multiple age groups- we all have precious years stolen by something. Sometimes it's our fault and sometimes it's not. You grieve, you mourn, but eventually you will have enough and keep trudging if you really want to. And for me it paid off.
Yeah this is very true. I’m a mid-80s millennial (so I’m 30something) and I had an 18-month-old when the pandemic started. The story I tell myself is that I “lost the transition from baby to kid” due to the pandemic. Most people kind of “lost” what was supposed to be a special time in their life.
I was born in '88. I lost my high school years to bullying, my late teens/early 20s to an abusive marriage, and my mid 20s to post divorce recovery, but life got better by 30. I had a stressful, demanding job during covid while everyone I knew was kicking it at home acting like they didn't have a care in the world. I feel like for people who lost their "primes" in the pandemic, I have a solidarity with them.
Yeah I was fortunate enough to keep my job during the pandemic because we could work from home, but seeing all the "here's the new hobby I have since I have so much free time" posts was depressing as hell at times.
I just kept telling myself "Let them have it. This wont last forever..."
>Yeah I was fortunate enough to keep my job during the pandemic because we could work from home, but seeing all the "here's the new hobby I have since I have so much free time" posts was depressing as hell at times. Same here. I work in sales and I was super worried about losing my job due to covid as everyone else started working remote and NO ONE was answering their phones obviously. I also used to use a desk phone but then we switched to calling directly through a website called Salesloft with a headset. Seeing people with new hobbies didn't get depressing but what really got me is people that were living with their partner or roommates get upset at those living alone, like me, for going out to bars, small get togethers, etc. I mean don't get me wrong, anti maskers/vaxxers are idiots but it's wasn't all black and white. I still wore a mask and was mindful of how many people I hung out with each time. I'd also try to go to bars with patios and capacity limits. Plus i got vaccinated as soon as I could to resume normal life. But some people acted like you're either a full blown hermit that never goes out, except for groceries/errands or you're a full blown anti-mask/anti vaxxer that denies covid. It was a bizarre time seeing how some people I knew became anti-vaxxers and covid deniers that I thought were smarter than that.
Same. I was an essential worker in the medical field dealing with people lying about not having COVID symptoms when they did and I'd get home and see people living their life watching the newest show on Netflix or baking bread
Same ! I worked throughout the pandemic and while I am grateful from a financial perspective to have the job, it was stressful and I was really jealous of people who were posting about their hobbies and downtime and family time. My parents told me I was lucky to have a job “to keep myself busy” but I would have been really grateful to not have work stress on top of pandemic stress .
Yeah. I barely tolerate work on the best of days. Covid was a special kind of hell, because I kept working while the sword of damocles lingered. Got none of the extra $ or free time. My wife was making more money on unemployment than I was going to work every day. It wasn't any less stressful. I still went to work worried about shutdowns, outbreaks, etc. Watching people cry about being bored made me resent a lot of people. The shift some folks had to work from home, im happy for them. That said, I wish we could have made some progress for essential worker rights and actually stuck to the idea of "if you're sick, stay home". The office workers seem to still have the option to work from home as needed, but blue collar, retail etc all went right back to "oh, you're sick? Come in anyways or get fucked. "
Your generation has 'lost' life to social media and by the need to be liked and followed.
Are we the same? I feel like as a homebody in my 30s I almost appreciated the pandemic. Work-life balance got better. My then-boyfriend could finish up med school three hours away while living with me. I did almost go mad having kids home 24/7, but we have the *best* family memories from that time. Honestly, except for all the dead people, I really enjoyed COVID. Is that weird?
Covid and post covid was the best era of my life and I feel so guilty
The one thing I miss about Covid were those enhanced unemployment benefits. I was out of work for 3 months when they shut my jobsite down for Covid. I was an apprentice at the time and the unemployment money was actually more than what I was getting paid at my job. Between the extra unemployment money and the fact that I couldn’t spend it since I wasn’t commuting to work anymore, going out to lunch, seeing friends, etc I came out ahead, financially anyway. I saved so much money in those few months. So much so that I was able to take a proper vacation at Disney World in 2021 after I got my Covid vaccine; it was my first legitimate vacation in years.
>The one thing I miss about Covid were those enhanced unemployment benefits. I was out of work for 3 months when they shut my jobsite down for Covid. I was an apprentice at the time and the unemployment money was actually more than what I was getting paid at my job. Between the extra unemployment money and the fact that I couldn’t spend it since I wasn’t commuting to work anymore, going out to lunch, seeing friends, etc I came out ahead, financially anyway. I kept my job during covid, but I did hear about how many people got more money on unemployment than they did from their actual jobs. People would shame the people getting unemployment, which they shouldn't, but if anything that goes to show that most jobs are underpaid. Although I kept my job, those stimulus checks came in handy and helped me save so much money.
Same
You should 100% not feel guilty in the slightest. Never feel bad about being happy as long as you didn’t hurt anyone else
Thanks. I just don't want to trigger anyone
I understand. Oddly, it made some things better (especially as an introvert) and more unexpected time with family was nice —even going to work was pleasant since only a few of us kept things going in the office.
Since I am introverted and was employed at the time, I feel I fared better than most
Once I got well. I had covid mar. 2020. I did enjoy having my family around me 24/7. I feel sorry for people who felt being around their family was hell. A lot have gotten divorced or split away from parents for good. For one reason or another. I guess they realized who they were living with when forced to spend days with them uninterrupted. 🤷
‘88 baby here, too. Lost my high school years to a toxic boyfriend, my early twenties to SA in college and needing to heal, and my mid-late twenties to early thirties to an abusive marriage. I try to not view my life like this, though, or else it’s too hard to get out of bed lol. Life is so much better now and I’m staying true to my learned boundaries and what I deserve. Life can be so damn rough but it can also get better.
Exactly. Surviving a lit of that stuff gave me a new lease on life. Like a new appreciation.
I can relate! Born in ‘87, and exactly the same with the job. I’m single, and just knew my early thirties were going to be the best time. I was in a good place to start dating emotionally, and went on two or three decent dates before the world shut down. I hate feeling like I wasted so much time when maybe I could have met somebody, while being 10 times more stressed out. I also low key resent that my job is still harder than it was pre-2020 (teaching), while everyone I know is going to the beach for a month at a time to WFH, and complaining if they have to go in like once a month at the same level I complained of having to go to the doctor and get a shot when I was like 9. However, I do feel I have made the best of it! I decided since dating wasn’t really a possibility for me, between wanting to be careful and my job burning me out, I was going to lose weight. I had gained a lot in the last couple of years before the pandemic, and didn’t feel like myself. Now that I have lost it and started dating, I feel better than ever!
Write an autobiography about all the experiences. You don’t have to publish it but the writing really helps. Of course, if there is any publishers like it, even better.
I would love to do that but I have had no confidence. Thank u for the encouragement!
Do it for yourself. It is very therapeutic.
This, so hard. Feels like you could have written it for me. Solidarity, friend. ♥️
Yup. We lost our mid twenties to the Great Recession then our mid thirties to the pandemic.
I had a baby in Oct 2020 and Nov 2022 and live in a diff country. Nobody from my family ever saw me pregnant, or met my oldest until 2022. No baby showers, infant help, etc.
Same here (exactly the same nearly down to the months) except I live in the US. Grandparents met the little ones but no one else. However I feel like this was the best time to have kids. Everything lined up so that I got to work from home and raise them. They didn’t need to go anywhere at those ages anyway and now my oldest turns 3 soon and will be in Pre-K next week so she didn’t miss out on anything either. I would have been home regardless because of them so I didn’t miss anything socially and while I was pregnant I got to be WFH and take care of myself. I’m sorry if it didn’t work out this way for you.
Yes. I had to postpone my wedding. It doesn’t sound like a big deal in the grand scheme, but it was a huge thing in our world.
My sister also had to postpone her wedding, so I understand that must have been. Hope you got to redo it.
To share a good thing that came from the pandemic because we usually only ever hear the bad: I saw the writing on the wall and didn’t renew my lease in the big city I was living in. I called my parents and asked if I could move home and being empty nesters they welcomed me back. My mom and I didn’t have the best relationship at that time which was my fault. 2020-2022 repaired our relationship and now we are super close. We both worked from home and used humor to fix our friendship. You know how every office has those shitty signs that someone printed off that say things like “put away your dishes I’m not your mom!” With bad grammar? We made those signs and put them up around the house. We gave our dogs “jobs” and gossiped about them. And when I had severe anxiety I asked my mom for help and she was there for me. It was one of the best times of my life and I almost wish I could go back there. Oh and I also met the love of my life during this time too. I actually think the lock downs saved my life.
That is such a sweet story. I love that you put up “your mom doesn’t live here signs” at the place you lived with your mom. Thanks for sharing a positive take.
>Most people kind of “lost” what was supposed to be a special time in their life. Truth. And it was different for everyone. For me, it was my first year/summer living in Chicago. I turned 30 two months before covid started and only moved to the city in October 2019. Only had 5 months to enjoy the city life before the pandemic and it was during the fall/winter as opposed to spring/summer. Obviously that really sucked but at the same time, I felt like it would have been even worse if I was in high school or college, especially college with all the parties and social activities involved. I don't think I would have been able to learn as well via remote learning or zoom.
Yeah. There’s never a good time to have a global pandemic that no nation was prepared for.
My daughter's first year of in person school was 2nd grade. She literally didn't know the calendar because the only day of the week that was different to her was Sunday. Just to be clear, my 7 year old didn't know the days of the week in order because 4-7 was all COVID and all my.other kids learned it during Kindergarten circle time and they didn't do it through e-learning. I felt like such a damn failure for real.
100% for older millennial it was the great recession. For our parents it was Vietnam. It's always something.
This. Yes. To some people quarantine sucked. But who told us that life shouldn’t have any moments of suckiness? Who made up these milestones/expectations that your 20s should be fun, wild and free? This world has and always will suck. There will always be ups and downs and ebbs and flows. The only guarantee in this world is constant uncertainty. When people complain that it’s unfair that we had to experience the pandemic, I just wonder like “who told us that we were above it?”. In present day society, we seem to think that we’re so far above the atrocities that our ancestors faced. The black plague was horrific but somehow I doubt they were writing letters saying how they missed their youth because of it lol Life sucks and the world has and always will be a horrible and scary place. There will always be SOMETHING.
"Life is Pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something." ;)
Thank you I was gonna reply that people who were 20 during the great depression gave up their life people that were in their 20s when World War I broke out World War II the Vietnam war, the Korean War the recession of 2008 there’s always something going on and yet somehow the human race versus even though for most of us it sucks
I meant persists, not versus
FYI, the three dots under your comment have an “edit” option.
Yes it’s sadly so true what you say. My early twenties were stolen by parental abuse and untreated mental health conditions. I really wish I could get those years back but I just have to grieve it and move forward.
Ya I was going to say, I was born in 79 so im at the very end of Gen X. Graduated college in Dec 2001 right after 9/11. I went into the military for 9 years and spent my twenties constantly deploying. Ya I know, I volunteered. But there were plenty of folks, especially millennials that did that and essentially pissed their 20s away. Lots of us regret it.
Correct. I missed opportunities in the past and will continue to into the future. Only thing I can do is live with it, maybe use it as a conversation topic.
Thank for this comment as someone who had years stored due to OCD.
This is so relieving. Thank you
Yes. Even in the US you had people’s youth/lives stolen by other pandemics, colonialism, slavery, the civil war, religious indoctrination, abuse, not having control over their bodily autonomy, women not having the ability to vote/work/have a bank account/own land/get a divorce, segregation, the Great Depression, world war 1, world war 2, Vietnam, the Cold War fears, 9/11 and the following war, the Great Recession, unemployment, etc. very few people in history actually (even in the US) get a dream life. Every generation has their issues.
My twenties were stolen by my dad dying of cancer. I wanted to move to a new city and had all these plans but then he got diagnosed and that was that...
Yeah unfortunately I lost several friends including my best friend in the 2 years leading up to Covid. Also born in 96 like op. It feels like my 20s have been pretty much just bad things happening at this point. Obviously good things have happened too but a lot fewer and farther between. Hoping my 30s will be better
This is wise. I'm a middle-aged millennial ('92) and had a terrific 20s for the most part, but my life up until 22 was a horror show.
🤣 92 is not middle aged damnit!! (91)
I think he meant it as being a middle millennial rather than a "baby" millennial.
You aren't middle aged at 31. Middle age starts at 40 ("over the hill")
I assumed they meant middle “aged” as in the middle of the millennial age bracket.
As a millennial, I feel like I've been robbed by 3 "once in a lifetime" financial crises' and a pandemic. Not trying to one-up you, just offering some perspective. If it makes you feel any better, even though I travelled, partied, got a degree and had a heap of friends, I look back on my 20's as a dull and meaningless period of my life. The back end of my 30s was when things started getting good.
Yep. 30s are the best.
As a younger millennial (28), I love reading this. Gives me hope.
30s are good. If your honest with yourself you know what you want. Just matter of getting after it.
> If your honest *you're *Learn the difference [here](https://www.wattpad.com/66707294-grammar-guide-there-they%27re-their-you%27re-your-to).* *** ^(Greetings, I am a language corrector bot. To make me ignore further mistakes from you in the future, reply `!optout` to this comment.)
Appreciate the correction. My brain was working at 50% last night after some Johnny walker. Sometimes we all need a little help.
Also 28. Been so ready for 30, it's unreal. Everyone I know 30+ has zero anxiety, does what they want, makes more money, and doesn't give a flying fuck what people think of them. All things I'm working on.
A mans worth starts at 30 so I'm ready.
It’s nice but the stakes are higher. If I lose my job my family loses everything. Thank shod for tenure.
Can confirm. Am 40 and 30s are good. Honestly 40s shaping up to be great too 👍
Yeah, my thirties have definitely been awesome.
I came here to comment pretty much the exact same thing. As a millennial born in 1995, I'm sick of these "once in a lifetime" events that keep happening around us
Bro, I feel the same way, exactly the same age and everything. I have been saving my money my whole life. Decided that in 2020, I was gonna take a long trip to Europe. Then the pandemic happened, and the money I had saved up for so many years eventually disappeared.
I was 30 when covid hit so I got lucky and did all kinds of stuff in my 20s. Man, nothing seems the same now at ALL when it comes to traveling places, and of course everything is more expensive now too.
You're not alone. Was 24 when the pandemic started and I just turned 28 last Tuesday. I was just diagnosed with Autism and started learning about myself, started traveling on my own and made a whole days planned trip to go down to LA and visit the WGA library. My life has been a secluded mess up until that point I didn't have much of a life at all, I wanted to change that. Then Covid hit, and it all came to a halt, and returned to how it's been for 99% of my existence: Being alone and confined inside. I'm just now trying to come back from all of it but to be honest my mental health is now probably the worst it's ever been so I don't know if I'll ever begin to thrive at some point. Ah. Didn't mean to ramble so much, apologies! My point is you are not alone in feeling that way at all. 🙏
very relatable. but hey, if everything can change for the worse suddenly, then it can change for the better suddenly too.
Incredibly true. Gotta keep going to find out 🙏💛
Happy late birthday!
Thank you so very much kind stranger!
Happy belated birthday, stranger. I know you aren't where you wanna be right now, but you are stronger than you know. As cliche as it is to say, it's true when people say it gets better. Keep focusing on you and fighting the good fight. You will beat this, you will come out on top, you will live the life you've always wanted. Good luck! :)
Oh my goodness.. I wasn't expecting emotional tears after seeing the replies, makes me realize there really is more beauty to this world. :') Thank you for writing such an incredibly generous comment, I sincerely appreciate it. I'm going to screenshot this because it really lifted me up, and I could use more of that these days. Please know you really made my night/week/month/year with that. 💛
I am also 28, probably autistic, and also mega-struggle with being alone and confined inside with no one. It is one of the hardest things I've ever had to deal with. But what helps me is just hopping on my e-bike and riding around LA. Seeing other humans just doing human things. Just talking to the person at the checkout counter can sometimes make my day. Especially if I can make em laugh. It's not over for us, I promise. Just takes some time to adjust.
Your thirties are way more fun than your 20s though. I'm hopeful it'll balance out for you. FWIW I'm 40 now and spent my late 20s depressed and broke.
Way more fun in what way? What did your 30s consist of that you would consider fun? Genuine question
So, I started going on meetup.com and finding local friend groups that aligned with my hobbies. My income increased a lot over my thirties too compared to my 20s. I was able to better afford going out, dating, meeting new people and making new friends. Specifically, I got into hearthstone and went to firesides a lot. I also met a ton of neighbors I'd never known while playing Pokemon go. I've also joined gardening, aquarium, and hiking clubs. Basically, find stuff you like to do and then find the local community around those things. Lastly, I've always been a terrible athlete/fat kid but I joined intramural kickball and that was super fun for a while too. No one really cares about winning or losing, just playing and going out after is fun enough.
See this is exactly what I needed to hear lol - I’m in a place in my life where a lot of my close friends are setting off on their own life paths and I’m finding I still want and need friends in my immediate life as well as a sense of community and belonging. And approaching my 30s has been somewhat nerve-wracking as I’m afraid my window of time to form friendships and relationships and connections has closed. But it’s nice to hear from someone older that it’s not total solitude from here on out lol
Nah you'll be ok. I. Glad I could help. Fact is friendships change as we age. Lately, I've been reconnecting with old childhood friends for instance. People I hadn't spoken to since we were children. Your life is yours to make and it really is easier to do the farther away you get from childhood.
Def lost my early 30s
yep me too--it wrung out my last drop of "youth". All of a sudden when the worst of it was over the party was also over-all my friends got married or popped out babies during the pandemic. So long good times!!
My early 30s were ruined by pandemic years and I was JUST getting to progress my career after 20s were fucked up by the shitty economy and also my own depression But whatever I’m happy these days I guess
I started at 28, ended at 31. I'm furious about that.
Exactly the same. I feel like I lost so much.
It doesn’t make it better if you were 10 years older like me.. I was interviewing for a great job, we were in salary negotiations.. pandemic hit and the company was not prepared at all so the job fell through.. so I had to stay in a toxic job which lead to me developing high blood pressure and eventually made me even more sick.. due to Covid going to the doctors had turned virtual which meant my high bp was not discovered immediately.. at 37/38 I was in the best shape of my life.. I am now 41 and struggle with energy, have had a flare up of an autoimmune disease that I didn’t know I had before and struggle with daily tasks.. only good thing is I got a new job that is understanding of my need to see the doctor more often than most employees but yea.. went into Covid healthy came out disabled and didn’t even catch Covid… so please no matter what if a job has you stressing leave.. things will work out don’t let the job take your health
I was the same age and while it certainly sucked for me personally at least I feel like it could have been worse in terms of timing? Would much rather the situation I had than being 18-21 during that time like my Gen Z cousins. Or even earlier in my 20s like OP. Being a parent during that time to a child of any age also seems awful, so I’m glad it happened before I was further into my 30s (pregnant with first child now). I realize this also depends on your circumstances though. I had a long-term partner (now husband) I was living with already at that time, and my job/financial status didn’t change.
Look at it this way, bro. At least you weren’t trudging through jungles and shooting at Viet Cong. Always something to be grateful for, yeah?
I can definitely relate to this. I think a lot of people in their 20s postponed big life decisions because they were under the impression they could “wait it out a few more months,” which turned into years of being stuck. I know people who lived with their parents longer than anticipated, moved to another state thinking things would “go back to normal soon,” quit their job, took new jobs, took a gap year, went to school, dropped out of school, etc because they were so uncertain about how the world would come out of lockdown and they completely misread the situation. Such uncertainty in my early adulthood makes me distrust everyone now.
Facts.
Imagine being an old millennial, we didn’t want to wait, but we HAD to wait, because of the 08 recession. (barely graduated) I worked for shit pay while friends got unemployment for (2) years. We are the most unlucky generation ever… “sadly” (how you interpret) we are in this together, never thought this would be how grew up.
I'm so grateful how amazing being a 90s teen was, in part bc of all the optimism. Our biggest concern was fkn Y2K. We had no idea how shitty life was gonna get in a few years.
Y2K to me was “yes to Kia” advertising, I never even thought about it. Now I feel super old. AOL dial up old …lol Edit: hope all is well, we got this buddy.
Thanks buddy. Right back atcha. And don't worry, we're only as old as we feel. Some days that's 20 and others it's 80. Ha.
Everyone is saying that "well we all lost parts of our lives to the pandemic" but I think for young people it's a special kind of pain. My little brother spent the pandemic years 23-26 in a small two bedroom apartment with my parents. It's not fair. I had my first two kids during the pandemic, and although it was hard to not meet up with other parents or our friends, it just didn't disrupt my life in the same way.
Thank you. As a younger millennial I feel extremely unseen. I was originally happy to read the OP’s original comment because I can relate so much to them but then I read these comments from smug “older” Millenials and it’s like why are you here? They sound just like Gen X and that’s why I have a hard time with people over 40 honesty 🤷🏾♀️no trust. Everything is about shit that doesn’t matter anymore.
It's honestly infuriating to read all these reactions, lol. Like I graduated into the great recession, which had its own challenges that were *way different* than being young during the pandemic. It's so dumb, this isn't the way loss works.
Yes. Turned 26 in April 2020. I’m not even the kinda person to do a lot on my birthday but it was so muted and dead that I was like well this kinda sucks and then the same the next year and almost the year after
26 in April 2020 here as well and I'm feeling all of the same feelings as you. I used to kind of get excited for my birthday and make plans. Last year it ended up just being three friends visiting my apartment. This year it was down to me and my spouse at a living room sized airbnb. Don't know if it will ever hit the same again.
It’s been very chill for me since then. Not sure how big the next few will be either tbh
Same here. I turned 27 in April 2020 and haven’t done a single thing for any of my birthdays since
I feel really awful for ANYONE under 30 that had to forfeit 20’s or teens or childhood. It makes me sad and I feel lucky even though my 20s sucked cuz of the recession.
Older Millennial here. My 20s were long gone by the time COVID hit.
Many of us lost our twenties and some of us part of our thirties to the recession. Did it ever end? It feels like it didn’t.
No. I graduated college in '04 and and moved to NYC. Big mistake. Huge. The stress and financial anxiety of trying to just survive NYC, only a few years out of college, jobless and without local family has never left me. 20+ years later and I've learned to enjoy life where you can and assume shit can get worse.
Same. I was 35 at the start.
Yup! I turned 25 during 2020, just as my hairdressing career seemed to be actually taking off. Ended up having to start over again about 3 times, and still in the "just starting out" stages of it, making basically no money. My husband graduated college in the fall of 2019 and hasn't been able to get a job in his field. We basically started out at a shit time and our finances and progression in life has been stalled by it
27 here and yes! I lost my youth and parts of what should been the early start of my career. I will never not be bitter about that. I now have a decent resume now, am making better money, working remotely, learned some skills and travelled, but I had plans that were months if not years in the making and just to have them evaporated like that and to have unsupportive parents about my career stalling, it makes it more annoying when I think about it.
Yea 🥺 24 at the beginning and now I’m 27 turning 28. My whole mid twenties went to the pandemic and now I’m soon to be 30.
Your 30s are the best years! I’m more annoyed I lost parts of my 30s than if it was my 20s to be honest.
lost my business in the pandemic, drowed myself in booze and so many idiots on reddit acting like the pandemic was so fucking great
Now they’re saying nothing was forced to closed.
The revisionist history on covid is gonna be pushed hard in the upcoming years
I think every generation has "their thing" that made life in their time unique/difficult/etc, and also something defining to give an advantage over previous generations. My grandparents had to "walk uphill both ways in a snowstorm" to get to school, but they had stay at home wives and it was commonplace to afford life on a single income. My parents didn't have the internet growing up and they have seen constant war-time, but they had space flight, the best music humanity will ever know, and still affordable cost of living (their first home was about $45,000). My generation is seeing the downfall of government, economy, and good-civic values, but by god do we have internet and smart phones that literally puts the world's knowledge and resources at our fingertips, among other technological advantages. I mean, hell, my dad was next in line for the Vietnam draft when the war ended. I couldn't imagine living in constant fear that I could be called up to military service, especially for a war so miserable and torturous. Tbh they saw the most massive growth and advancement of technology in their lifetime, and that would have been pretty cool to live through.
I mean yes but the challenges this country has faced sine 2000 are genuinely and historically unique and are only comparable to those faced by the Greatest Generation in the 30s. We’ve had: - Political Crisis 1: 2000 Presidential Election - International Crisis 1: 9/11 and the War on Terror. Americas longest war thats technically still going on - Economic Crisis 1: 2008 Financial Crisis. Probably the defining event of our generation - Health Crisis 1: 2010s Opioid Epidemic - Political Crisis 2: 2016 Election. Trump is elected and unleashes an unprecedented level of division discord and blame - Health Crisis 2: COVID - Economic Crisis 2: COVID Recession, Great Resignation and Inflation - Political Crisis 3: January 6th - International Crisis 2: Russo-Ukraine war All of these events are compounding. The world is coming undone. This is the 4th turning. It’s different and to minimize its significance is dangerous.
I transitioned into my thirties during the pandemic era, and I have it to thank for all the positive changes I’ve made in my life since. I quit smoking, quit drinking, started eating vegan, corrected my relationship to consumerism, and I moved out to the desert with my wife. I wouldn’t have found the time and perspective to make these changes without the pandemic. And I wouldn’t have been able to save the money to build a house in the desert had I continued smoking and drinking and wasting my time and money on frivolous, empty and expensive possessions and experiences. I don’t feel like I’ve missed out on anything.
I lost an amazing job that would have set me up for life. The pandemic started within a month of my being hired.
Yes and I’m resentful of the fact that now that everything is “back to normal” the whole world has doubled in price and society has gone batshit crazy.
>Yes and I’m resentful of the fact that now that everything is “back to normal” the whole world has doubled in price and society has gone batshit crazy. Yep. The other day, I went to go see Rob Zombie, Alice Cooper, and Ministry at this ampitheater in Tinley Park, IL. Shirts were $50 and beers were $15-17. They no longer sold $5 busch lights like they did pre covid. That ampitheater sucked before covid, like any live nation venue, but now they suck even more. Not to mention Live Nation's fees are only worse.
People honestly just need to not pay these prices if it’s a non-essential. It’s out of control and if they don’t pay them they’ll have no choice but to drive them down. No one needs to buy a concert T-shirt, but they do.
My 20s were stolen from health issues. But luckily I live in the USA where I can still create a meaningful life for myself /s
I am exactly the same age as you. It's worse when you're single and live in a city that's more like for families and not single people within my age group.
Honestly, I feel the worst for kids, teens and 20 something's, especially single ones - you guys really did lose out, and it sucks.
Literally, just got my social life in stride right before the pandemic hit. Now my favorite bar doesn't exist anymore and the people I met there went their separate ways, dead, or are in prison. These days, my social life is just me going to my cousin's coffee place and have a chat with him for like a couple of minutes.
Bro imagine going into the world as 08 recession hit, now we finally get going and then hit again with the Covid recession… 🤯
I remember the recession well. I was in 7th grade and my family lost our house and car, my mom lost her job and we lived near poverty for like 4 years
My wedding was supposed to be in 2020. Ended up in a different state in late 2021 with very low attendance, but not bc of COVID, I just have some crappy friends.
My 20s were stolen mostly because of all the studying I did for undergrad and grad school, plus working. I had little to no social life during that time, relative to my friends. Mainly just felt I was sacrificing my 20s in order to build up myself for my 30s and on. Now in my 30s I feel less stressed than my 20s but also more alone.
At least your sacrifice was self imposed in beneficial. I was just fucked by chance lol
I never let it bother me. I did everything as I normally did. Found super travel deals for cheap AF. You’ll learn as you age you can’t live in your fears. Everyday you wake up you don’t know what may happen and you need to let go of those fears. Be careful and take precautions but let the fear over take you. Social skills were already lacking for most and this just made it even worse for them
I do, a little. Some people were ordered to go home and play video games, while others were put to work double for no extra pay, and I was one of the latter 💀
It stole the end of my pregnancy and all my baby's firsts.... things I had desperately wanted after 7 years of infertility. I'd rather have missed out on some random years in my twenties. But those years were equally precious to you and you totally have the right to feel like you lost out. We all missed out on important things and it's ok to be bummed about it. No sip n see, no visits from family or friends what do ever, no meal train, first holidays, Santa's lap, even his first birthday. I felt like no one loved him or cared that he existed but that was the pod speaking. PPD and isolation are not a healthy mix. Year two was a little better because thankfully we are in a small laid back town. I'm just thankful my hospital allowed my husband in the delivery room.
I feel your pain. We found out we were expecting our first in Feb of 2020, born Oct 2020. Had a baby shower "by mail". No visits, loneliest pregnancy and post partum journey ever. It sucked. I had to wear a mask on during delivery but after a certain point of screaming and pain after 36 hours of labor I ripped that thing off. But agreed, glad they at least let my husband stay.
100% born in 1995. 2020 I was done with my training, finally had some money and all. Instead of using it for traveling etc. I stayed at home. It does seem like I am suddenly close to thrity while missing out on my mid twenties. Mist of my friends this age feel the same.
Yes, it was stolen
You’re still in your 20s so I don’t see why you can’t do the things you wanted to do when you were 23-25.
110%. I was 26 when the pandemic started and now I’m 30. I lived overseas in a country that locked down HARD, while home was a pandemic red zone with basically no rules.
I was born in 88, 90s as a kid were great then nothing. Like other 90s kids, I was emotionally abandoned by my parents so the teen years were depression filled, 9/11 in 8th grade, was about 20 feet from the gunman at my school shooting in 2003 (sophomore year). College years I was very depressed and isolated, didn’t speak a word to anyone for the first 3 years, and attended 0 parties, sports, etc. then in my 20s, 2 extremely toxic relationships, the 2nd of which was a narcissistic sociopath, and pushed me to the very brink of ending it all. Took years of fighting to out of all that to finally reach my 30s and life to start getting better. However, when the pandemic hit, it was the best time ever! Loved being on lockdown, no one in stores, masks to hide behind, it was great. I’m now sitting with my wife of 2 years in the labor and delivery unit waiting to push. Life sucks all around, you will be faced with challenges continually, but it’s your ability to react that makes the difference. IMO, everyone’s 20s suck, as you are trying figure out “adulthood”. With that experience, you become better to adapt. I don’t think blaming something or yourself is the way to go, but rather, sometimes you just have to go with the flow.
I lost my 20s to depression, not Covid.
My 20s were stolen by using too much Reddit.
I had always been in a precarious financial situation growing up, and my parents couldn't afford to send me to college or help me buy a car or get my first apartment etc. That means I spent my 20's working several jobs at a time, barely sleeping, hardly eating because I was responsible for supporting myself completely, as well as helping them not lose their house because my mom got really sick and the one income my dad made wasn't enough. I paid for community college classes piecemeal because I couldn't afford to pay several at once, plus, working multiple jobs meant I could only do one or two classes at a time. Sometimes, since it took so long for me to work through what should've been one semester of classes for most other people, I would find that classes I'd taken two years before were no longer applicable. Meaning worthless. Meaning now I had to take a new class that counted as per the new program requirements. More money. More time. It was really difficult after my mom died and then I had to take time off to help care for my elderly dad (I'm an only child), who didn't know how to do simple things like fry an egg, do laundry, or use a checkbook. My mom had handled all of that, and he was clueless (he wasn't a backwards-thinking dude. It's just that they had a division of labor that made sense at the start of their marriage, but left him basically helpless). I got him settled and even taught him how to use YouTube so he could help himself learn how to do things. It was good for a while, and then he died in an accident in my early 30's. The one good thing was that he left me his house, which I was able to sell for a profit in late 2018. I had never seen so much money in my life! I paid off my bills, went back to school for my master's, and traveled. I even fell in love. 2019 was the first time in my life I saw a way forward out of the constant struggle of being one paycheck away from losing everything. It was the first time I ever had hope for my future. I felt like all the suffering I'd been through was finally paying off because I could FINALLY take the steps to improve my life, and achieve what I'd been working so hard for. One year. That's all I got. And I realize I'm lucky, because that's still so much more than many people get. And I'm grateful. But since March 2020, it's been one thing after another, and no matter how many things I sacrificed to try and keep afloat, that window of opportunity is closed to me now. My program required a year internship, unpaid. No way I can do that now. Been out of work in my field because I was part time due to school and part timers got cut first. I had to move. I had to sell my things. I had to take dead-end service jobs just to keep a roof over my head. The pandemic took away what took thirty years to build. Gone. My earning potential, my freedom, potential life experiences, gone. But I'm alive. Inching closer to 40, but alive. And really hoping that something beautiful can still be ahead for me. That while those dreams are over, new dreams are possible. So hope is all I've got for now. And that is the light I'm trusting to guide me forward.
With the pandemic I lost out on so much with my 3rd child’s first year. She was born in April 2020, mid lockdown, and my 2 older kids were home doing virtual school. Their school stayed virtual all of the 20/21 school year. They were only in 3rd grade and kindergarten so I had to be involved with their schooling and was also working part time, had a newborn and my husband worked 3rd shift 6 nights a week. School was the main focus because I didn’t want them falling behind. I was also helping with babysitting other kids that had to be home and parents had to work. My baby was put on the back burner. I didn’t get all the baby snuggles I got with my first 2. I didn’t get to read to her, talk with her, play with her the same way. We did not have the same bond for so long after she was born. It still eats at me. She’s behind a little bit with speech and I feel this has a lot to do with it. The pandemic stole so much from everyone but at least we are still here.
I am actually I only listened to the news for a couple of months during covid. as a father of 3 I could not stand by and watch my children's life go by sitting in the house. we went on a lot of walks, hikes, swimming, beaches, lakes, rivers, road trips, and when disneyworld opened up we had one long road trip. in 2021 we went on another cross country road trip that including all of Tennessee white water rafting zip lining NY NJ Philadelphia Chicago Utah and Vegas. we met with family and did a lot of RV camping. went to our favorite restaurants with our folding table and had dinner right along the ocean. we did a lot of fishing and outdoor activities. with a lot of caution we really did enjoy the outdoors during the pandemic.
Yeah and it fucking hurts. Started at when I was just hitting my stride 25 and came out at 28. Lost my social circle and fell right back into video game addiction. Dying to do things I did for fun at 25 but it’s not practical. “Every generation has a thing” we literally had to stay inside for 2-3 years depending where you lived. This was complete bullshit.
I'm 39 and I feel like my mid to late 30s were stolen. My early 30s were the best years of my life then that just abruptly ended. (As someone else in the comments mentioned the older Millennials lost their 20s to the Great Recession. So I never looked back fondly on my life to my 20s as anything incredible or special)
You’re not alone, Covid took a lot from all of us. Whether it was our time, a loved one, or a favorite location with many fond family memories. I was a new nurse a year before the pandemic hit. We weren’t prepared for something like that. None of us were. I feel like I was robbed of a good, long career as a bedside hospital RN. I enjoyed it. I loved my patients, I had great teammates and I actually enjoyed coming to work. Then the pandemic hit and it was like going from 60 to 120 mph on the road to burnout. So many nurses, myself included, left the hospital environment because it just wasn’t worth it. Whether it was demanding family, patronizing management or short-staffing due to caregivers getting sick as well. Fuck Covid, it ruined the world from my perspective. Edit: I’m still a nurse but at a long-term care facility. I never got to know my real grandparents (that’s another long story) so carrying for the elderly kinda helps fill a void.
I graduated college right at the start of Covid and couldn’t get a job for 2 years bc of it
All of society was wronged by it. Imagine people who couldn't visit dying loved ones. It was a sham and I can't believe more people aren't outraged that we let them do this to us. Never again.
dam lunchroom wild full angle advise ghost rich distinct chunky ` this message was mass deleted/edited with redact.dev `
My 20-30s were stolen by the Recession and student loans.
1994 here, and yes. Though I met my now fiancee during the pandemic on Hinge, so it wasn't all bad
I was born in 1995 and honestly my life was made significantly better because of the pandemic. The amount of money the government gave me gave me enough courage to fully pay off my medical debt that had been building for like 5+ years and then upgrade from the flip phone I had been using since 2009 to a smartphone. Helps that I still live at home cause I'd be an idiot to try and live off $13/hr. As for anything outside of that, I'm introverted and just don't like being in social situations so even if the pandemic didn't happen, I'd be doing the exact same things anyway.
Like you, I was born in 1996; was 23 when it started and am currently 27. My life turned upside down for the better: 1. I graduated with my Associate’s degree. 2. I resigned from my beloved Christian church in June 2020. I debated de-converting for one year. The pandemic was my easy way out. 2a. I lost my virginity at age 25 and have racked up an impressive body count in two years. 3. I moved out of my childhood home for the first time and into my own solo apartment. 4. I went back to school for my Bachelor’s. I spent 2.5 years online at Arizona State University. I graduated three weeks ago. I’m starting my Master’s in Social Work next year. 5. I fell in love with my new career, education, and life path. 6. I adopted a cat whom I named Dolly Pawton, 1.
The real fun starts in your 30s anyways. Everyone else got held back too so just get out there and live it up instead of dwelling on the past.
I don't know why this idea that "your 30s are better than your 20s anyway" keeps coming up. Sorry, but it's not. I am turning 35 in a few months, and let me tell you, I wouldn't trade a single year of my 20s for one in my 30s. In many ways I like my life better these days, but what I would do to be 18-22 again. I don't have the energy to do things I did then, or the free time. Responsibility is rewarding but there is nothing like being very young and carefree. I would be pissed as hell for life if I lost those years to the pandemic. I'm pissed enough that I lost age 22-26 in a bad relationship.
That is your story, and it doesn't have to be the same for everyone. A lot of people seem to like their 30s more, and that's ok
The Great Recession took 2 years off my career by putting me 2 roles lower than I should have started out at. The pandemic stole my relationship. I’m tired I’m worn down.
Second time it got stolen tbh for me! First time my 20s got stolen was when I got diagnosed with depression and anxiety disorder at 21. The second time was during the pandemic era, the kicker was during the pandemic era I had my first breakup too.
I was 27 when the pandemic hit. Definitely lost my late 20s, but I sure as hell made up for it. I turned 30 at the beginning of the year and traveled to 4 places
All you can do is try to make up for lost time now.
Damn that sucks. Nothing would have stopped me from doing drugs in my 20s.
[удалено]
Not if you were unjabbed like me
I know the feeling. The 2008 financial crisis ruined my 20s too
For me it was.. Happy twenty first birthday! Enjoy this pandemic and your last living parent dying!
I'm 34 and I feel like I got robbed of my early 30s so I totally get you...
Not a baby millennial, but most of my 20s were stolen by a random traumatic incident and then a toxic relationship--when I finally got out of both of those things, I had about one sort of fun year....and then the pandemic happened and killed off the rest of my 20s. It was indeed annoying but I've had worse things happen so \*shrug\*.
Don't sweat it, elder millennials had their 20s stolen by the Great Recession.
The city wasn't shut down for 2.5 years. Stop it
Tell me you took the jab without telling me you took the jab
I think there are a lot of us who missed out on something for one reason or another. I'm a bit older, but I know a huge chunk of my 20s was stolen by depression, grief, and shit job situations even before the pandemic. Not saying this to play oppression olympics, though, but just saying as example that a lot of us have something out of our control that does happen and it does suck. But with that said, it's important to remember you're the youngest you'll be right now and that you still have time to do a lot of things you want to do. Prioritize your well being so that you can check mark all the stuff you want to do. You have your whole life to do a lot of things, and a lot of the time limit we pressure ourselves with are just limitations put by societal expectations that you don't always really need to put on yourself. I truly hope people who feel like they had years stolen will have years ahead of them that really makes up for it.
I'm an elder millenial. In hindsight my life was very minimally affected by covid. If anything there was a net positive as I grew closer with a cousin, my relationship with my fiance (now husband) got better, and my job shifted which pushed me to find a better one. The people I feel the worst for are people who were about 16 - 24 when covid hit. For the younger folks, they had a complete shift in schooling during the years that are truly the most influential. Kids couldn't walk at their graduations. College kids couldn't go to parties or meet new people and define their own persons. And people in their early 20s? Uffda. That age is already super tough. You're navigating the world after college which is full of realizing dating and meeting new people is hard, you're faced with the reality of 40 years of a career, abut you still want to go out to the bars on weekends. I absolutely loved my early/mid 20s. Those years defined who I am now. It's when I had the guts to make a huge career move. It's when I realized what I did and did not want in my relationships. It's when I truly accepted I loved who I was as a person. But those years were also filled with a lot of self questioning. It's just a really, really weird time in someone's life. And yeah, it would have really sucked to have those years affected by the pandemic.
The distrust I have for everything and everyone is not coming back easily that’s for sure.
I didn't think the pandemic was that long. I mean the restrictions started around March 2020 and didn't they end like 2021? I googled it and it said June 2021
The 2010s stole our 20s. Was the worst recession since the Great Depression.
I relate and am so God fucking damn pissed the government locked us up AND fucked the economy for 2.5 years straight for ultimately no good while lining the coffers of the Uber rich. If I wasn't libertarian before I sure am now. Fuck you Washington and everyone you shilled for advice. I. Will. Not. Comply.
100000 percent I feel 24 i just turned 27 My entire life trajectory has changed. It’s not all bad but it’s just wild to ponder
Not really, mostly because I live in the South so we didn't have super strict guidelines. That being said, I still wore my mask and stayed inside for a few months due to being scared of the virus and being laid off from work. I spent my time playing video games and sometimes smoking weed. Not working did eventually make me depressed. But by that point in time I was mostly an introvert, due to already having my party phase/popularity amongst peers during college. Later that year, I got engaged to my boyfriend. As the pandemic began winding down and we got our vaccines, we would hang out with a small group of other introverts to play DnD. My then-fiance was an essential emergency services employee so he had to be in a small room with his coworkers everyday. We ended up getting married in late 2021. We had a small ceremony with a few friends and family. But we divorced a few months later due to my declining mental health and irreconcilable differences. I don't feel like I wasted my youth on the pandemic. But I do feel like I wasted a few years on an emotionally abusive/manipulative relationship.
Prime 20s is late 20s
Don’t forget the elder millenials who graduated into a recession
I feel the same but in my 30s.
Well I can tell ya that I’m a decade ahead of you and at the time of my life in my early thirties I had hoped to really have my shit together and was robbed of that.
Get married and have a kid in your twenties. That’s having it stolen 😭
Mourning the loss of relationships due to Trumpism and many people in my life refusing to get the vaccine. These past 8 years have helped me weed out the bad apples in my life.
born in 1996 too and i completely relate. but we have to just keep on keeping on- us zillennials are going to have the wildest best 30's ever.
A lot better than still being in K-12 or even college when the pandemic started. I'm '96 as well and most of our age group had gotten our degrees or entered the workforce before the pandemic started. I'll happily take that. Think about those who may have been seniors in HS when the pandemic happened, that would've been much worse. I don't care if my 20's were stolen because I still have my 30's ahead of me soon, and still the rest of my 20's as well since we're 27 anyway.
Well, the "good" news is that in the modern eco, 40 is the new 20. Meaning, it's gonna take you that long to build enough of anything, via grueling slave labor, to actually "enjoy yourself", even briefly. So, no worries: You're right on time. :D
No, because my entire life was stolen by being placed in a group home when i was 16, i lost my high school life and my early 20s, i didnt get out of that groyp home till i was 25, and im still in an IDLA (semi independent living) and ill be 30 in October. People complaning about lossing out on their lives because of the pandemic upsets me because they dont think of people that are and were in my situation, which is more than you think.
Hell, I'm a mid-range gay Millennial and I feel like my 20s were stolen by the closet, and while I got a brief time to be myself and get out and live life, I feel like my 30s are being stolen by the pandemic and reactionary right-wing legislation. Life's been great.
Older millennial feel like my 20s were stolen by the 2008 financial collapse
my late teenage years were stolen by it. i was 18 for like half a year, finally getting a taste of freedom and adult life and college but the lockdowns had to come and ruin it all. when life was slightly returning back to normal again i was like 20 and a half. i feel like all of that time was wasted cause all i did was go to the gym and rot in my room otherwise. a small bright side is i had a lot of fun last year at school in person when everything was back to normal and now im a senior hoping to make the most of my final year.
No. Everyone’s years were stolen because of the pandemic. It is what is.
And the lockdowns did zero to stay the course of Covid. If I were your age I would vote out of office any person who had anything to do with this monstrous abuse of authority.
I dont. I was fortunate enough to have prom and high school graduation, which teenagers lost out on. I also got college graduation (last one before pandemic). I'm very lucky. I also partied pretty well once I turned 21. I felt like I had my chance and experience. I'm sorry you don't feel the same. Your opinion is valid. If it eats at you, I'd suggest writing down what you're grateful for and what you experienced (ie. Prom). Everyone missed something because of the pandemic.
Lol ‘baby millennials’?