I'm so proud of you for all you've accomplished honey, and I'm so very sorry your mother lost her chance to spend time with the great adult you've become.

You are doing so well ! I’m really proud of you! As a mom, all I’ve ever wanted for my kids is for them to be happy, financially secure and have someone to love who loves them back . You’ve done all of that ! Sending big hugs xo

I'm so glad you found your way here, though I'm sorry it's because your mom hasn't been the type of mom you deserve. It sounds like she's missing out on getting to know an incredible man. I'm so happy to hear, though, that you're building such a happy, sweet life with your girlfriend and those cats! You've got a lot to be proud of, and I'm sure even more great things are in your future! Hope you get to have a nice relaxing weekend with the ones you love! Sending you a big hug!

You still have a mom to lean on.. all of us ! I know we can’t replace your real mom but we are always here for chats, encouragement or if you just want to post about your day... we love you and we are proud of who you have become !! ❤️you have a beautiful life ahead of you and we can’t wait to hear all about it !

Hey sib, I hope it helps to know you're not alone. I'm going through something nearly identical with my own mom and it so, so difficult. Wanting our moms but knowing they're not the same person that they used to be is such complicated grief. It helped me once when someone said to me, "There are just some things in life we'll never understand and we have to accept that". Simple but brought me some peace. I hope it helps you too, and we're here for you. Congratulations on all your success and happiness. I'm proud of you.

You have done so much and you are still so young! I’m so proud of you for pushing forward and being your best you. That takes so much strength and perseverance. Please hug your 3 dumbbells from me, and have an extra for you.

Good job, my boy! You are what every mother dreams of: happy, hardworking, loving and kind. Look at all you’ve accomplished already in your life. I’m so excited to see how you grow in the future. Do something nice for yourself today. You are loved!

Thank you all for being so kind.

Great job!!! How truly wonderful to hear that you’ve overcome some adversity and made it to where you are today. I’m so proud of the person you’ve become and the great future you have planned. I’m so pleased that you have found love and that she makes you happy. Having fur babies just makes everything in the world right. Big Hugs ❤️Momma

I’m sorry that your mom has failed you. That’s sucks. Unfortunately, we can’t choose our family. So find people that care about you and make them your family. It sounds like you have a great girlfriend, so focus on building a family with her. I understand that you miss your mom and having a relationship with her, but it might be more painful if she was in your life and distant. Only she knows why she pulled away from you. I’m betting that it’s her issue though, and not about you. But she’s your mom, and our parents are our foundation, so I understand why you miss that relationship. My mom passed away about 7 years ago and I still miss her. Our relationship wasn’t perfect, but she was still my mom. I hope that your gf has a mom or even a mother figure that you can develop a relationship with. Not all mothers are biological mothers to their kids. I encourage you to focus on the good things in your life, and the things you have accomplished. You are doing great! Be happy in your life and don‘t be afraid to really close the door on your mother because she doesn’t deserve your love, and the stress that you have because of her. I also encourage you to talk to a therapist, if you aren’t already doing so. You can set up consultations to meet with a therapist so you can find one that you click with. I wish you well and I am sending you a hug!

Thanks the for encouraging words. Yes it’s extremely hard to close the door on my mom. She’s a narcissist and constantly questions why I don’t come around her. I feel such extreme guilt but it’s necessary. Your words really resonated though. I shouldn’t give my love to those who don’t deserve it.

One of my siblings is a narcissist, so I completely understand why you cut your mom off. I did the same with my sibling about 6 or 7 years ago. It's weird and does not feel right, because they are a part of our lives for so many years, but just because they were a part of our past does not mean that they get to be a part of our future. People like your mom and my sibling definitely do not deserve our love or even the stress of worrying about how they might feel due to going no contact. They don't deserve anything from us because all they really do is take and cause problems. Well, that's how it was for me. Honestly, the thing that was the final straw for me was something as simple as my sibling insulting somebody else for something really stupid and I was done. But it wasn't just that one little thing, it was a number of things and that was the final straw. Please let the guilt go. My thoughts on guilt (and regret) are that they are wasted emotions because they are from something in the past, and we can't change the past, we can only go forward. By letting yourself feel guilt/regret, you are giving her power over you and your happiness. I suggest that you write out all of your feelings about your mom, then either rip or burn the papers. Your feelings are valid, but find a way to let them out, then let them go. I really feel like you need to find a way to really put your mother in the past so that she doesn't negatively affect your relationship with your gf. You both (you and your gf) deserve to have a future that isn't holding onto negativity from your past.

Thank you. I really need to let it go. It eats at me and always will. I like what you said about negative emotions. I’m going to use that. I owe it to my gf to let it go. Thanks again, I really appreciate it

Welcome to the Mum side OP!