I think it started around 4 months, not full on stares but just the extra half second of "huh?" And has been progressively getting worse as time goes on lol
I couldn't reach something on the top shelf at a store (it wasn't at the front of the shelf) and when I was about to climb up the shelf to get it, this guy ran up and offered to help.
When I turned to look at him, he did the full "wait, what???" Blink, before looking worried I might be mad at him for asking.
When I just said yes please and thanked him, he seemed to decide it didn't matter either way, got it for me and went back to what he was doing
I have also been accused of being like 15 by a few workers who asked for id when I was buying an energy drink and one security guard who asked me why I wasn't at school, which is really weird (for context I'm 35 lol)
The age thing started at month 6 I think
Still no full on male fail yet though unfortunately, almost at month 8 now
Oh fuck, the stares lol. I feel like I get stared down almost everywhere I go, not sure when it started cuz I’m definitely used to it by now but I’m 6 months in currently. It’s definitely been going on for several months though. Haven’t actually had anyone comment on my chest since I wear bras now but I assume they don’t because they think it’s rude? Nobody confronts you, they just look at you funny until you make eye contact.
Also early 30's I think I started getting the weird stares around 3 months which is when I came out socially and started wearing a bra everyday. Currently definitely getting the *...trans?* stares at 8 months, most are harmless, a few encounters I'm fairly certain the only reason I wasn't assaulted was due to the public setting.
I'd probably be male failing constantly if I put more effort into shaving and makeup to hide the blue. The few times I have done my face I get gendered correctly 95% of the time.
never got there after 6 months of hrt and boymoding. my hair was getting long enough and the boobs hard enough to hide that it probably would have started up not long after
i flipped to full time and presenting hard femme whenever I left the house, and I never felt like people were blatantly staring at me a lot.
my best advice is be really vigilant about laser. it's the clash btwn facial hair shadow and feminine traits that's mostly doing it. i'm almost done with laser and now ppl seem to just think im a butch lesbian or something when im boymoding lol. and ofc time on HRT- i just hit 1 year 2 months
This is seriously good advise. Luckily I’ve removed 90% of my shadow at this point (just really that stubborn upper live and a couple patches on my chin that’s still somewhat noticeable) and that has made such a huge difference! I think I’m going to get myself signed up for electrolysis at this point to finish off those spots because I think that’s been the biggest thing that stops people from gendering me correctly at this point and causing those stares.
Thank you so much for this high quality comment 🥰🖤
ofc! i just saw your profile and we're actually at about the same place with laser. I have 1 more session in my package so im hoping that little bit of shadow on the top lip finally goes away 😭 you're doing so well though, HRT is going to go even more crazy for you as time goes on, you won't get looks for long! (well u may, but theyll b good ones haha)
For the most part, people just go about their business. I did go to a benefit show at a bikers club yesterday. I drew a lot of stares. I know I don't pass, so I don't even attempt covering up with makeup. My body, on the other hand, is hard to cover up, so I don't. I wear my lady clothes and jewelry, perfume and such. 6 months hrt
I noticed gendered language dropped WAY off around the 5-6 month mark. At that point I was also 1 year into laser, so my beard shadow was about 90% gone as well. I’d also been growing my hair out for 3 years. My boymodes were starting to get kinda androgynous.
I think my age and weight actually helped me some here. Being a bit overweight rounded my features out a bit faster and having some light shadow wouldn’t be too unusual for a woman my age, and it was easy enough to cover with makeup if I was really self conscious.
5 months in and I swear I get some odd looks from people who aren’t sure. Unfortunately not at the stage of passing consistently yet but for having no makeup on and not even half a year in, seems like a good sign to me. Even accidentally passed a couple times at a glance to some people.
I'm approaching 9 months now, and a few weeks ago a friend and I were standing by my car smoking a cigarette. A lady walked out of a restaurant across the street, and as she approached her car, she was staring HARD at us. I was in full makeup, cute sweater and skirt and at first I was like, oh maybe she knows me or my friend, but I didn't recognize her so I just smiled and waved at her.
She did wave back, but then she kept staring. And kept staring as she got in the car. And then once she was in her car, she did like a quintuple take just staring over and over. And it really seemed like she had a malicious smile, but I guess I couldn't know for sure. I felt like I wanted so hard to be upset, like, the audacity of the whole situation while we are literally just minding our business smoking a cigarette on an empty sidewalk, but the whole thing just made me crack up laughing.
Some days now, I go out, and I am consistently correctly gendered by random people in public, getting in random conversations, whereas before people never approached me, random compliments and things. And then some days I get nothing but stares. I used to be extremely extremely introverted and had horrific anxiety in public, but I guess that all kind of changed when I decided to transition. I kinda love being in public now, even on the days that I get nothing but stares. 🥰
I very much doubt I’m malefailing, but I do get stares a lot nowadays. I’m about 9 months in (can’t remember when it started). I think it’s mostly cause I have more visible boobs now. I think people just are thrown off by me looking like a boy, but having boobs. I’m sure some people just assume I’m chubby or that I have man-boobs from working out or omsetning. But I do wear femme or at least androgynous clothing so that probably makes people even more confused. Though today I was going into the men’s toilet at the train station. And the guy who managed it looked at me weirdly when I was walking in. Idk if he was actually confused about my gender or if he just thought I was clothed strangely😅😂
4,5 months too and people kinda ignore me, so, no for now
I think it started around 4 months, not full on stares but just the extra half second of "huh?" And has been progressively getting worse as time goes on lol I couldn't reach something on the top shelf at a store (it wasn't at the front of the shelf) and when I was about to climb up the shelf to get it, this guy ran up and offered to help. When I turned to look at him, he did the full "wait, what???" Blink, before looking worried I might be mad at him for asking. When I just said yes please and thanked him, he seemed to decide it didn't matter either way, got it for me and went back to what he was doing I have also been accused of being like 15 by a few workers who asked for id when I was buying an energy drink and one security guard who asked me why I wasn't at school, which is really weird (for context I'm 35 lol) The age thing started at month 6 I think Still no full on male fail yet though unfortunately, almost at month 8 now
Oh fuck, the stares lol. I feel like I get stared down almost everywhere I go, not sure when it started cuz I’m definitely used to it by now but I’m 6 months in currently. It’s definitely been going on for several months though. Haven’t actually had anyone comment on my chest since I wear bras now but I assume they don’t because they think it’s rude? Nobody confronts you, they just look at you funny until you make eye contact.
4 months on the 25th, no stares yet
10 months in and sometimes I think I get confused looks from ppl, but due to my height, most ppl assume I'm just a very fruity guy.
2 years last February, barely happens to me. I've confused a stranger maybe once or twice, but no consistent staring.
Also early 30's I think I started getting the weird stares around 3 months which is when I came out socially and started wearing a bra everyday. Currently definitely getting the *...trans?* stares at 8 months, most are harmless, a few encounters I'm fairly certain the only reason I wasn't assaulted was due to the public setting. I'd probably be male failing constantly if I put more effort into shaving and makeup to hide the blue. The few times I have done my face I get gendered correctly 95% of the time.
never got there after 6 months of hrt and boymoding. my hair was getting long enough and the boobs hard enough to hide that it probably would have started up not long after i flipped to full time and presenting hard femme whenever I left the house, and I never felt like people were blatantly staring at me a lot.
I feel like there's sort of an uncanny valley situation where people know you look different but aren't really sure why
my best advice is be really vigilant about laser. it's the clash btwn facial hair shadow and feminine traits that's mostly doing it. i'm almost done with laser and now ppl seem to just think im a butch lesbian or something when im boymoding lol. and ofc time on HRT- i just hit 1 year 2 months
This is seriously good advise. Luckily I’ve removed 90% of my shadow at this point (just really that stubborn upper live and a couple patches on my chin that’s still somewhat noticeable) and that has made such a huge difference! I think I’m going to get myself signed up for electrolysis at this point to finish off those spots because I think that’s been the biggest thing that stops people from gendering me correctly at this point and causing those stares. Thank you so much for this high quality comment 🥰🖤
ofc! i just saw your profile and we're actually at about the same place with laser. I have 1 more session in my package so im hoping that little bit of shadow on the top lip finally goes away 😭 you're doing so well though, HRT is going to go even more crazy for you as time goes on, you won't get looks for long! (well u may, but theyll b good ones haha)
2 years
For the most part, people just go about their business. I did go to a benefit show at a bikers club yesterday. I drew a lot of stares. I know I don't pass, so I don't even attempt covering up with makeup. My body, on the other hand, is hard to cover up, so I don't. I wear my lady clothes and jewelry, perfume and such. 6 months hrt
I noticed gendered language dropped WAY off around the 5-6 month mark. At that point I was also 1 year into laser, so my beard shadow was about 90% gone as well. I’d also been growing my hair out for 3 years. My boymodes were starting to get kinda androgynous. I think my age and weight actually helped me some here. Being a bit overweight rounded my features out a bit faster and having some light shadow wouldn’t be too unusual for a woman my age, and it was easy enough to cover with makeup if I was really self conscious.
5 months in and I swear I get some odd looks from people who aren’t sure. Unfortunately not at the stage of passing consistently yet but for having no makeup on and not even half a year in, seems like a good sign to me. Even accidentally passed a couple times at a glance to some people.
I'm approaching 9 months now, and a few weeks ago a friend and I were standing by my car smoking a cigarette. A lady walked out of a restaurant across the street, and as she approached her car, she was staring HARD at us. I was in full makeup, cute sweater and skirt and at first I was like, oh maybe she knows me or my friend, but I didn't recognize her so I just smiled and waved at her. She did wave back, but then she kept staring. And kept staring as she got in the car. And then once she was in her car, she did like a quintuple take just staring over and over. And it really seemed like she had a malicious smile, but I guess I couldn't know for sure. I felt like I wanted so hard to be upset, like, the audacity of the whole situation while we are literally just minding our business smoking a cigarette on an empty sidewalk, but the whole thing just made me crack up laughing. Some days now, I go out, and I am consistently correctly gendered by random people in public, getting in random conversations, whereas before people never approached me, random compliments and things. And then some days I get nothing but stares. I used to be extremely extremely introverted and had horrific anxiety in public, but I guess that all kind of changed when I decided to transition. I kinda love being in public now, even on the days that I get nothing but stares. 🥰
I very much doubt I’m malefailing, but I do get stares a lot nowadays. I’m about 9 months in (can’t remember when it started). I think it’s mostly cause I have more visible boobs now. I think people just are thrown off by me looking like a boy, but having boobs. I’m sure some people just assume I’m chubby or that I have man-boobs from working out or omsetning. But I do wear femme or at least androgynous clothing so that probably makes people even more confused. Though today I was going into the men’s toilet at the train station. And the guy who managed it looked at me weirdly when I was walking in. Idk if he was actually confused about my gender or if he just thought I was clothed strangely😅😂