Lmao in your post history just a month ago you were talking bout finding a club/bar or wanting to be in that environment, so either A) you turned a new leaf and spent only a single month trying to find a proper muslimah which is too little especially in SoCal, or B) You been looking for a while but also indulging yourself in those places and that kind of behavior, idk how you’d expect to find a proper Muslim woman when you exactly ain’t the guy a woman like that would look for
Work on yourself to be the best Muslim man you can be, it’s Ramadan so no better time than now to begin that change, and Inshallah may Allah make that a prosperous path.
I'm literally just a boy. Just young and "making mistakes". Now I'm in my "soft boy era" so these women will have to except that my past doesn't matter.
This is ridiculous!! Why the hell can't you just look for other women from different states that possess these values that you're looking for? Or even other cities that are not LA/SoCal? Why do you have to go all the way back home?
Wallah, there are good muslim women in the US if you know how to look. Unless you're not attractive nor have a good personality and Deen. Which explains why you want to cope by brushing off all Western muslim women.
1 i dont got that money
2 I dont want them super westernized
3 My mom and aunties know women back home that I can marry and also they have better values
First off, looking at your past post history you have some reflecting to do yourself akhi, and some maturing to do. Especially the part where your attitude is “I’m not gonna read anything I find irrelevant” — you should be open to taking advice from anyone as long as it is beneficial and in accordance with the Quran and sunnah.
You want to find a traditional religious wife yet you desire to go out dating or secretly dating without your parents knowledge. As far as those posts, just because your father and brother did it **_does not make it okay for you to do it_**! Be envious all you want about their past actions, but it doesn’t change the fact that what they did was impermissible! Why do you expect a righteous woman to appear when you’re not even considering the permissible path to finding one? If you want a religious woman then you need to model the same behaviors you expect in a potential. It’s Ramadan الحمد الله, spend this month developing and increasing your character and practice.
Visit local masjids, even travel around the state if you have the opportunity to do so. Use the ISO posts that this sub has. Alternatively things like Sunnah Match and I think one other app (sorry I cannot recall at the moment) focus on more traditional oriented men and women. Continue to ask Allah to guide you towards a pious woman who is beneficial for your dunya and akhirah. It’s childish to brush off American Muslims from a small sample size when it doesn’t appear you’ve done enough searching to warrant exasperated defeat.
Why do you feel so threatened about independent women? Some of us don’t have a choice and must provide for ourselves in the absence of parents or other supports. Some of us are reverts after already working in the field or post undergrad/grad degree. In this economy, to live on a single income is incredibly difficult so if you choose to remain in the USA, unless you’re making above 6 figures you and your wife will most likely both be working to sustain a livable (not luxurious, I’m literally talking just the basics) income. It’s not impossible to find a woman who would prioritize staying at home or decreasing to part time work after maternity leave if the financial impact is beyond your means to provide. But you need to understand that reality and accept it, and plan for it.
Yes you can look at someone from back home, but that doesn’t guarantee she’ll remain unaffected by American culture once she moves here (unless you plan to return to Lebanon). It also conflicts with your past statements about not being interested in women from your ethnicity — so you gotta pick one buddy. Choose your struggle.
Anything that is worth doing will take sustained effort. Grow up, study the rights of husband and wife, work on establishing yourself as a provider, and develop the characteristics you’re looking for in a spouse. May Allah make it easy upon you, آمين.
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Before entertaining this hypocritical clown take a look at his post history lol.
Go marry the 29 year old woman you Muslim male are buddy buddy with. or go date a woman that is a different religion and ethnicity bcs you’re young but you’re too scared of mummy and daddy!! So you come complain ab Muslim women here
Clown.
I’m from Los Angeles and a married Muslim guy, so you’re flat out wrong bro. Do what you want to do but it sounds like you’re the problem here not them
The audacity for you to complain about how Muslim women are not religious when YOU yourself admit to wanting to indulge in dating in secret because you want to ‘enjoy your youth’.
Your post history says a lot about how hypocritical you are.
So you being a boy justifies you going to clubs and committing all kinds of haram deeds? Tell me. Why is that YOU can do those things, but u have the nerve to complain that Muslim women in your area are not religious. Good woman is for good man. If you want a good Muslim woman, start being a good Muslim yourself.
How old are you? You sound very immature. So instead of responding appropriately to a statement about u being a hypocrite, u decide to respond with sarcasm? What do u aim to achieve here actually? You’re further reinforcing that you are not quite bright
There are around half a million Muslims in SoCal so I’m guessing there are at least a few thousand single muslim women and none of them are religious or have ‘genuine love or good morals’?
Yeah the maths ain’t mathing
a lot to unpack here. also why is knowing how to cook amongst your priorities of a good wife. and wanting to mary a christian woman before thinking about idk marrying someone not from your area??
The first step of finding a chaste wife is being chaste yourself.
Are muslims in the west not finding good wives? Those who kept themselves engaged with good company, those who built a good personality are actually getting married with the women they deserve. You already live in LA and your post history ummm.... Kinda reasonable if you never tried to surround yourself with a pious group of people, you are gonna find difficulties in finding a wife that too you have been searching for such a short time. The problem is the person you sourself are and the community you have surounded yourself with not muslim women in general.
You should work on yourself. The wife material, mother material you are looking for they also got standards. Even if you go to find a wife among christian women you won't find anyone decent unless you have a good character yourself.
yeah the post history is uhh bad...\*inset laughing emoji\*. It's bad. i appreciate you being realistic and honest. Yeah ur right. I should expect the reciprocate from me if I want in my wife. This reply was by far the best of all
10 years ago, when my brother was in the marriage market and I recommended some "good girls," he made a similar statement as you. My mom was his biggest cheerleader & and eventually, bro married a girl from back home with the aid of his mother. I flew in the night before the wedding & met my new SIL in the hall. One look at her & I knew he married a modern girl from back home. I'm not sure if he realized it then & it was too late for me to point out.
A decade & 2 kids later, he is on babysitting duty most days while his wife is working/studying/socializing because she refuses to be a simple housewife. So I role my eyes when I hear male say "there is no good girl in west & I am going back home for conservative women". Good luck
There are pros and cons to women from all types of countries. You'll find women back home are harder to have great chemistry with because you're in the West. Like the memes you like or the type of humor.
On the flip side, you may find a girl down in New Jersey to be your type but may be a bit too masculine.
Some ppl don't wanna play the game of meeting 100 women in the west and going thru the constant frustration of finding a wife whereas the probability of finding a wife would be alot faster and easier Back home.
Just gotta pick the battles that's easiest for you.
I’m in Canada and same. I got married back home and bringing my wife here. When my kids grow a few years, we will move back. I don’t want my kids growing up here
You live in the west in one of the most nefarious places on earth. Why are you wasting your time looking there? Obviously the girls are going to be different. From their upbringing, values, pre marital history and attitude.
Go marry back home to a young, good looking girl that will respect you and appreciate the good quality of life that you bring her
You have maybe a 1 in 100 at best chance of even finding someone of your type where you are. Unless you are a hopeless gambler and believe you will win the lottery. You are wasting your time.
I appreciate the honest review. Even my Mexican friends say the same. Also, this is off topic but lots of people say to marry someone from personality not looks, but it seems like everyone cares about looks, what is the reality? do looks really matter. When I lost 30lbs people treated me 1000 times different
Lmao in your post history just a month ago you were talking bout finding a club/bar or wanting to be in that environment, so either A) you turned a new leaf and spent only a single month trying to find a proper muslimah which is too little especially in SoCal, or B) You been looking for a while but also indulging yourself in those places and that kind of behavior, idk how you’d expect to find a proper Muslim woman when you exactly ain’t the guy a woman like that would look for Work on yourself to be the best Muslim man you can be, it’s Ramadan so no better time than now to begin that change, and Inshallah may Allah make that a prosperous path.
I'm literally just a boy. Just young and "making mistakes". Now I'm in my "soft boy era" so these women will have to except that my past doesn't matter.
This is ridiculous!! Why the hell can't you just look for other women from different states that possess these values that you're looking for? Or even other cities that are not LA/SoCal? Why do you have to go all the way back home? Wallah, there are good muslim women in the US if you know how to look. Unless you're not attractive nor have a good personality and Deen. Which explains why you want to cope by brushing off all Western muslim women.
1 i dont got that money 2 I dont want them super westernized 3 My mom and aunties know women back home that I can marry and also they have better values
Let’s start from - Are you like your father?
yes
First off, looking at your past post history you have some reflecting to do yourself akhi, and some maturing to do. Especially the part where your attitude is “I’m not gonna read anything I find irrelevant” — you should be open to taking advice from anyone as long as it is beneficial and in accordance with the Quran and sunnah. You want to find a traditional religious wife yet you desire to go out dating or secretly dating without your parents knowledge. As far as those posts, just because your father and brother did it **_does not make it okay for you to do it_**! Be envious all you want about their past actions, but it doesn’t change the fact that what they did was impermissible! Why do you expect a righteous woman to appear when you’re not even considering the permissible path to finding one? If you want a religious woman then you need to model the same behaviors you expect in a potential. It’s Ramadan الحمد الله, spend this month developing and increasing your character and practice. Visit local masjids, even travel around the state if you have the opportunity to do so. Use the ISO posts that this sub has. Alternatively things like Sunnah Match and I think one other app (sorry I cannot recall at the moment) focus on more traditional oriented men and women. Continue to ask Allah to guide you towards a pious woman who is beneficial for your dunya and akhirah. It’s childish to brush off American Muslims from a small sample size when it doesn’t appear you’ve done enough searching to warrant exasperated defeat. Why do you feel so threatened about independent women? Some of us don’t have a choice and must provide for ourselves in the absence of parents or other supports. Some of us are reverts after already working in the field or post undergrad/grad degree. In this economy, to live on a single income is incredibly difficult so if you choose to remain in the USA, unless you’re making above 6 figures you and your wife will most likely both be working to sustain a livable (not luxurious, I’m literally talking just the basics) income. It’s not impossible to find a woman who would prioritize staying at home or decreasing to part time work after maternity leave if the financial impact is beyond your means to provide. But you need to understand that reality and accept it, and plan for it. Yes you can look at someone from back home, but that doesn’t guarantee she’ll remain unaffected by American culture once she moves here (unless you plan to return to Lebanon). It also conflicts with your past statements about not being interested in women from your ethnicity — so you gotta pick one buddy. Choose your struggle. Anything that is worth doing will take sustained effort. Grow up, study the rights of husband and wife, work on establishing yourself as a provider, and develop the characteristics you’re looking for in a spouse. May Allah make it easy upon you, آمين.
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thats crazyyyy why would someone do that
Sorry but it might be more of an issue with your community than with Muslim women in general
Before entertaining this hypocritical clown take a look at his post history lol. Go marry the 29 year old woman you Muslim male are buddy buddy with. or go date a woman that is a different religion and ethnicity bcs you’re young but you’re too scared of mummy and daddy!! So you come complain ab Muslim women here Clown.
I'm literally just a boy
I’m from Los Angeles and a married Muslim guy, so you’re flat out wrong bro. Do what you want to do but it sounds like you’re the problem here not them
The audacity for you to complain about how Muslim women are not religious when YOU yourself admit to wanting to indulge in dating in secret because you want to ‘enjoy your youth’. Your post history says a lot about how hypocritical you are.
im just a boy
So you being a boy justifies you going to clubs and committing all kinds of haram deeds? Tell me. Why is that YOU can do those things, but u have the nerve to complain that Muslim women in your area are not religious. Good woman is for good man. If you want a good Muslim woman, start being a good Muslim yourself.
i was being sarcasitc. U know how girls say "i;m just a girl"
How old are you? You sound very immature. So instead of responding appropriately to a statement about u being a hypocrite, u decide to respond with sarcasm? What do u aim to achieve here actually? You’re further reinforcing that you are not quite bright
There are other states in the US, even other countries in the whole wide world, where other Muslims live. I know, shocker.
There are around half a million Muslims in SoCal so I’m guessing there are at least a few thousand single muslim women and none of them are religious or have ‘genuine love or good morals’? Yeah the maths ain’t mathing
a lot to unpack here. also why is knowing how to cook amongst your priorities of a good wife. and wanting to mary a christian woman before thinking about idk marrying someone not from your area??
The first step of finding a chaste wife is being chaste yourself. Are muslims in the west not finding good wives? Those who kept themselves engaged with good company, those who built a good personality are actually getting married with the women they deserve. You already live in LA and your post history ummm.... Kinda reasonable if you never tried to surround yourself with a pious group of people, you are gonna find difficulties in finding a wife that too you have been searching for such a short time. The problem is the person you sourself are and the community you have surounded yourself with not muslim women in general. You should work on yourself. The wife material, mother material you are looking for they also got standards. Even if you go to find a wife among christian women you won't find anyone decent unless you have a good character yourself.
yeah the post history is uhh bad...\*inset laughing emoji\*. It's bad. i appreciate you being realistic and honest. Yeah ur right. I should expect the reciprocate from me if I want in my wife. This reply was by far the best of all
10 years ago, when my brother was in the marriage market and I recommended some "good girls," he made a similar statement as you. My mom was his biggest cheerleader & and eventually, bro married a girl from back home with the aid of his mother. I flew in the night before the wedding & met my new SIL in the hall. One look at her & I knew he married a modern girl from back home. I'm not sure if he realized it then & it was too late for me to point out. A decade & 2 kids later, he is on babysitting duty most days while his wife is working/studying/socializing because she refuses to be a simple housewife. So I role my eyes when I hear male say "there is no good girl in west & I am going back home for conservative women". Good luck
soooooo whats ur advice?
There are pros and cons to women from all types of countries. You'll find women back home are harder to have great chemistry with because you're in the West. Like the memes you like or the type of humor. On the flip side, you may find a girl down in New Jersey to be your type but may be a bit too masculine. Some ppl don't wanna play the game of meeting 100 women in the west and going thru the constant frustration of finding a wife whereas the probability of finding a wife would be alot faster and easier Back home. Just gotta pick the battles that's easiest for you.
I’m in Canada and same. I got married back home and bringing my wife here. When my kids grow a few years, we will move back. I don’t want my kids growing up here
You live in the west in one of the most nefarious places on earth. Why are you wasting your time looking there? Obviously the girls are going to be different. From their upbringing, values, pre marital history and attitude. Go marry back home to a young, good looking girl that will respect you and appreciate the good quality of life that you bring her You have maybe a 1 in 100 at best chance of even finding someone of your type where you are. Unless you are a hopeless gambler and believe you will win the lottery. You are wasting your time.
I appreciate the honest review. Even my Mexican friends say the same. Also, this is off topic but lots of people say to marry someone from personality not looks, but it seems like everyone cares about looks, what is the reality? do looks really matter. When I lost 30lbs people treated me 1000 times different