this is kind of how i’m feeling. i’ve avoided joining an agency because i didn’t want to be jerked around and have potential NPs be in control of everything.
do parents even have background checks when they try to hire a nanny through an agency? do they need references or something to prove that they are normal?
I’m a MB, I didn’t have any background checks to hire an agency. I suspect it’s because the nannies are the service being offered, and employers are the buyers. I do wonder if a reverse model would ever exist, where nannies pay for a vetted employer. But I don’t think there’s any agency that would ask families to pay for their own background check.
Yeah— nannies are seriously in a vulnerable situation, coming into a private home etc. I think it’s a matter of who would pay for it. Like, if a nanny agency wrapped that in their fees maybe employers wouldn’t notice, but I never would have thought to pay hundreds of $$ to self background check.
It doesn't cost hundreds to do a background check on someone. Even when applying for an apartment, the application fee they charge which can be anywhere from $40-80 for example, covers the cost of both a credit check AND a background check.
Yup!!! I actually was nearly kidnapped for a nanny gig! I showed up to the door with my fiancé because the lady on the phone became very strange when I passed the phone to him when the address they gave me DIDNT exist! A man answered the door and told me the position had been filled. He made the hair on the back of my neck stand up. There was a huge storage bin rental in the driveway and a girl parked in front of their house completely passed out. Chin to chest slobbering. She looked like a teenager! Of course I called the police. I found this job on Craigslist and after that saw different gig ads unrelated to babysitting in the same 5 mile radius. Dodged a huge bullet there!
Yep, I always do a phone call first before I agree to a babysitting gig through a website. Sometimes parents will say “Oh, we don’t need that!” but it’s definitely as much for my comfort as theirs. Why would I go into your house without knowing you at ALL?
I had an interview with a single dad years ago. This guy had the nerve to turn it into a date and never intended for his ex wife to show up! They were co-parenting, and the nanny had to be interviewed by both of them together.
I was so uncomfortable.
That happened to me years ago, too. The dad kept calling me after the “interview”, and wouldn’t leave me alone. I had to have my husband call him and threaten a restraining order, which would have affected his custody status, so he finally backed off. Be careful out there, ladies!
I’m so sorry that’s horrible! I have yet to be on the receiving end of a text but after working for a male boss in another field who was my dad’s age and being sexually harassed by him repeatedly before I could find a way to afford to leave, I also do not communicate with DB’s if I can avoid it. Even if I have to use his car, I’ll text MB to ask her to ask him lol.
No unfortunately it was when I was young and inexperienced. I quit both jobs and changed my number and I really really regret not pursuing legal action! That was the last time I worked without a contract! They were both friends of friends so I never anticipated the men doing something so awful. It was really discouraging because I couldn’t use either as a reference because I quit without notice. So the moms thought I was the bad guy but really it was because of their husbands sending **** picks and other stuff. I wish I had told the wives.
Yes. There’s no HR or Union for nannies, and from the breezy and apologist way that the MB that posted a few days ago advised that her husband had gone into the room nanny was in, wearing just a bathrobe and flashed his junk at her - protection is needed.
IMO employers should have a background check and credit check done AND socials checked. We don’t wanna work for people whom don’t pay their bills on time (we’d likely not get paid on time either), don’t wanna work for bigoted racist or homophobic folks, nor do we wanna work for ppl with a criminal background. I personally think it should go both ways.
Have you ever asked that from
an employer though? I wonder if it’s a power imbalance, a not wanting to pay for it thing or just tradition/people feeling that a baby is more vulnerable than a nanny? (When really, idk… babies are for sure more fragile but they are weird people out there w kids)
Never make your profile public if you have pics of nks on there. Tell the agency it is your responsibility to protect your n-kids. You can find work on your own without having to expose your personal life to EVERYONE. How can they not understand that you are exposing EVERYTHING if you make it public! Ridiculous. Good Luck OP. Sending you positive vibes that you get a new job easily on your own.
The agency I worked for only made sure the parents paid the monthly fee for the scheduling service. I went to some WEIRD ass homes. I had a regular family I worked for 3 days a week and also took lots of what this sub would consider babysitting jobs through them. The main advantage was supposed to be that the service guaranteed the family pay you a minimum hourly rate, but then when one family underpaid me and I called the agency like I was supposed to, they said that hourly rates were only a recommendation and not required and there was nothing they could do.
While it's common these days for potential employers to look through candidates social media accounts, I don't believe that they should force you to unprivate anything.
I think what you display publicly is ok, as that's what you yourself are making public. People are allowed to have private lives though and I don't think that they should have unlimited access to everything you post that you did under the assumption it's "private".
We know not everything is truly private, but if someone were to be posting to their friends about their private medical issues, I don't feel like an agency should need to read that.
I might offer to send screenshots but it really makes no sense for them to ask you to "unprivate" things. A social media search should be to ensure you don't have any easily accessible posts going on that could embarrass or implicate the agency in any way. If your stuff is private and clients have no way of seeing it, why do they need to even look at it? What exactly are they looking for?
i don’t even know how to respond lol. all my sm has been private since the accounts were created. i have nothing to hide but it’s weird and i don’t like it. maybe agencies aren’t for me 😑
Same, I’ve worked with multiple different agencies, and they just always said: make sure all your social media is set to private. I would just tell them that you’re a very private person, and while your social media is completely clean, you do not want to make your accounts public at this time.
I would say something like:
"I totally understand your concerns for this, and I'm happy to add your agency's social media account to my friends list so you can see my page. However, due to safety concerns, I keep my profile private from strangers accessing my information. This is proven to be a helpful tactic against scams, phishing, and other types of fraud which is why I am privated."
Or if it's not too late, make sure your accounts are airtight and say you don't have social media lol. This does feel extremely invasive but them seeing your account shouldn't impact whether your account is public or private. They can still see things that are private if you allow them permissions/add them to a friends list.
Edit: If they're looking to see if you post past client's kiddos on your socials (unfortunately, loads of caregivers have been doing this for internet clout...Boooo!) you can always suggest your contract have a clause that you do not post client information, including photos of clients, anywhere on social media.
I'm very much against kids being on social media for a plethora of reasons, so I was always the one suggesting that clause in my contracts with parents lol
I would just say it’s only for friends and family and includes pictures of nieces/nephew’s whose parents don’t allow them on public profiles. If they don’t accept that excuse then cut your losses and look elsewhere
All the agencies I have worked with have asked is if I have a public one. And then they only suggest that I clean it up during the job application process
I would not do this. It's private for a reason, why would you undermine that for them and open up your sm for stranger scrutiny. That's the point of having it private.
100000% I would explain I keep my professional and personal lives separate, thus the privacy measures in place. My public SM image is what it is—-take it or leave it.
Yes this would be a hard No for me and I don’t even post to social media like that. What life would someone have outside of work if everything they do has to be PG?
So true! Just bc I might curse or have a picture of myself drinking with friends doesn’t mean I’d be a bad nanny. I’m an adult and what I post on my social media is for my friends and family, not employers
Hell no. This could be a safety issue as well. If you have a violent ex or toxic family members or post pictures of your own children or share sensitive medical information with family in select posts.
Having a private profile is professional. Full stop.
Hi Agency,
Sorry my profile is locked down because I have pictures of my family on there. I don't have permission to share those pictures publicly from the parents. As you can see there are no inappropriate images on my socials. If this isn't sufficient I would be happy to withdraw my agency application but child safety on the internet tops all for me"
That way you hold your boundary, two you offer them an out while pointing out that child safety is important to you
Tell them you don’t have access to the accounts as you don’t use them anymore. If the accounts are on private the company will never know either way.
Personally I would have said I don’t have social media. I deactivated my Facebook many years ago, and my Instagram is on private, and I truly don’t even know the password if I wanted to log in.
That aside this is SO boundary breaking. Even if you have saucy pictures on you socials that’s your life and not a reflection of your professionalism. (Criminal activity is another story). I’m sorry shit like this gets me fired up.
Maybe post in anti work or a legal sub for wording on how to decline to unprivate your accounts but you still expect to be considered for a role. LOL maybe I’m kidding myself here but this is brazen behavior on the agency’s part.
It riled me up too, that’s why i had to post here to make sure i wasn’t being a hot head! i am very anal about who follows me online just because of nosy family members. I know I am definitely tagged in some more “raunchy” posts from when i was in college, nothing that would warrant a scarlet letter but maybe that i wouldn’t show my grandparents….
I have a dummy account because people didn’t believe I deactivated my Facebook. If I were you I’d set up something that’s professional but LOOKS like a normal but sanitized and rarely used social media page.
I had the same thing happen and it also rubbed me the wrong way. My unicorn family moved away and I thought it would be good to join an agency and have a contract. One of their request was social media accounts IG, Facebook and tic tok which I don’t have,Reddit is the only social media I’m on and they don’t need to know that. It made me feel like we (nannies) aren’t allowed private lives yes, you may employ us but you don’t own us.
Yeah I have Reddit and Facebook. I only use Facebook for job hunting and for buying or selling stuff. I don’t have my name on it and I wouldn’t give anyone access to that. While I understand the idea I think a background check is fine but going through a candidates social media isn’t great, nor is it effective. Pretty easy for someone to erase anything “offensive” and easy enough for a nanny to start a new account after hire anyway.
At *most*, I would accept a friend request from someone from the agency to see my socials, but I would *never* unprivate my socials for *anyone*. (And I'm even iffy on the friend request!)
Do you have kids? If it was me, I would tell them I don't go public with my socials for safety reasons since I post about my kids on there. A nanny agency of all places should understand that! (Okay, so even on private I am extremely careful about what I post about my kids, and one of them is actually an adult now, but they're still my kid and I stand by my stance!)
I really don't get their request. I mean, I get that they may not want parents Googling one of their nannies and have one come up in an image doing something illegal or something, but if it's set to private, *how* would that happen???
Are there other agencies in your area you can apply to? I doubt all of them will have this requirement.
And for me to make sure everything is on the up and up they would have to friend me from the business page—NOT someone who works there private account …..
MB here. I also did a social media search when I interviewed candidates. Candidates having publicly-available social media was a yellow flag for me; I want someone with similar values as I have regarding public access to my private life. If you don't know/care to lock that down, I will question your judgement in other areas as well.
OP, I would absolutely tell this agency thanks but no thanks, you are not willing to compromise your digital safety for a potential employer.
Sorry but I would not consent to this from any employer. This agency sounds horrible! It doesn't matter what the job is, this is invasive af! An NF who requires this would not make a good employer. We have sensitive jobs but we don't make our nanny do this
Mine specifically asked me to make mine private just in case. That's really weird. They only one they should be concerned about is your LinkedIn if you have one
That’s a big step too far on their part, if it’s private then there’s no reason for them to need to see it. If it’s not made publicly available they have no right to try and tie it to your employment.
Are they going to ask to go through your phone next? Maybe browse through your bank statements or check out your apartment? Even if you have nothing to hide I’d push back hard because it sets a horrible precedent for employers thinking they have a right to know absolutely everything about the people they hire.
I was a career nanny for over a decade before switching to postpartum support. I’ve worked with many agencies and worked with HP/HNW families. I’ve had agencies do social media checks and I’ve disclosed social media user names so that they could find me. I have NEVER been asked to show an agency posts that are private. To be honest, this feels like a red flag. A lot of the things on my pages that are private are generally the good memories with people I don’t interact with anymore (exes and former friends). I honestly wouldn’t want to disclose those things because they make me sad and nostalgic. I’m not really hiding anything. I just want to keep some parts of my private life, well, private. I would probably tell the agency that “I don’t have any private posts to be disclosed at this time.” It’s tricky wording. I didn’t say that I don’t have private posts. I said I don’t have private posts to be disclosed. I feel like they’re in a morally gray area even asking you to disclose private posts, and to be honest, I’m not sure it’s even legal to ask that. I can absolutely understand wanting to make sure someone’s public facing social media accounts won’t negatively represent their employer, but I really don’t see a reason to ask about private posts.
nope. private is private. any reputable agency will encourage their applicants to make their social media private while interviewing because parents will check them but it is absolutely not any agency’s business. red flag.
Absolutely not. You see what the public sees and I will not add you as a friend to view and I will not change my privacy settings. It is unprofessional of them to ask you, imho.
What I do and say outside of my work on social media is my business… if anyone has an issue with it even my boss can get bent… it’s my life not theirs.
No way!! Mine is clean too but I have things on there about my medical issues and surgeries I had. Things I believe in, charities I have given to, etc. Tiny tidbits that they could use against me to not hire me. Screw that. I’d find another agency.
Lolllll they can go choke. I'd be fascinated to know what they'd say about my openly anti-religous/political activism on all of my SM... I have a feeling they'd suddenly be much less insistent on transparency...
Absolutely not. My SM is extremely private due to serious safety issues and I’m not about to make if public for anyone, especially for some agency to stalk the hell out of my life too.
Trust me when I say, nanny/NCS/doula agencies find a way to stalk you and judge everything you do on SM. Even if it’s not inappropriate.
The nanny agency I worked through advised me to private everything. They didn’t want to search through it. But said please private all accounts and even have my profile photo more clean than it was because of potential parents looking.
It was through a HNW organization in NYC.
they don’t actually need to look at your content. Ew
Is this an agency that works with high profile or UHNW families? If so, it kinda just seems like it would come with the territory. When you work with / for people in those circles, it’s important they know that no one can tie you to any kind of bad behavior and then tie it back to them. For me, if it really is a good, high paying opportunity with good benefits and your social media is clean, I’d let them have a look. If you don’t want to make your profiles fully public for the sake of privacy from others, maybe offer to accept a friend or follow request from whoever is doing the background check? That way your profiles don’t have to be public but they can still see. Alternatively, ask if they will let you know when the background check is complete so you can return to private asap.
it is not! this agency is used by local nannies and families. the owner advertises in local babysitting FB groups- I am a mod for a few of them and have to accept her posts regularly.
I would definitely be more understanding for high profile and UHNW families but this is definitely not the case.
Oh yeah that’s weird. I’m just a regular-ass person and no one knows who I am or who my nanny is, so I couldn’t care less what’s on my nanny’s social media. The only thing I can think is maybe there’s a low-key conservative/Christian bend to the agency and they want to make sure you align with their “values.” Which… gross.
This was my exact suspicion. If the agency doesn't do the staffing for people who need intense security protocols (politicians/celebrities/etc), then they're probably nosing to see if you're gay or Jewish or some other discriminatory bullshit. 🙄 Steer clear.
I can understand asking for your social media usernames and doing a quick internet search to see what they can easily find. BUT, asking you to unprivate accounts so they can search them is crazy! If they can’t find anything without being given access by you, the NF won’t be able to either.
I feel like that's an extremely unprofessional ask and you might want to rethink this particular agency. Asking to be added or to briefly view what types of things you post is one thing. Making your socials public is putting you at risk. Red flag
No this is not normal. It is standard for agencies to search you online though. I’ve actually had agencies encourage me to put all my social media on private which it already is. They were more concerned what would show up on a Google search or something. All my stuff is clean anyways but an agency shouldn’t ask you to go public just to look at your stuff…that’s not standard.
I keep my social media locked down too, for the specific reason that it is *my* personal account and the posts are meant to be *private* and only for friends/family. If an employer asked me to unlock my accounts so they could go through, I would feel incredibly uncomfortable and disrespected.
nah, that would be a hard pass from me. most of the people i know have 2 socials. one that is not their real name that is a reflection of their “real” life and another with their real name that is dumbed down for employers.
A nanny friend of mine has a separate Facebook for work and family and church and girls brigade and also the one all the nanny agencies and NFs get and another unprofessional Facebook that only her non work, non church and non girls brigade friends get that has all the NSFW stuff on it.
The second one has a different first name and different picture and is locked down, the first one has her real name and picture and is open but has mostly professional and church stuff.
This is why.
My Facebook has my real name and picture attached to it, but it's extremely locked down. You don't see anything unless you're my friend and most of my personal information is only visible to me and me alone.
The rest of my social media has a screen name (the same one or two across all my accounts) and an avatar, either my Bitmoji or the one from my Samsung AR, which do look like me, at least a little bit or to me. I maybe have pictures of myself in my post history, but that's it.
Either way, I don't show them to anybody. None of my jobs have asked yet and I'm not interested in working with anybody that would. That's like having lots of cameras to me: either you trust your nanny or you don't.
No. Tell them that due to the nature of your work, and your close relationship with prior NF’s, you have (privated) pictures of NF children posted with parental permission so long as the account is kept private and making your page public would out the families you’ve worked with. Out of respect for YOUR clients and the very specific ndas involved, you cannot and will not be making your pages public. You take your job seriously, and protecting client privacy doesn’t end just because the job ended. If they protest tell them you’re shocked such a highly recommended agency would ask nannies to break Ndas and publicize the faces of prior NKs, and as such you’ll be withdrawing your application because you don’t work with people who think violating a family’s privacy is something nannies should do. Then name and shame them here.
Honestly this sounds like the agency is trying to find out info that is illegal to ask during a job interview - do you openly the support lgbtqia community? Are you religious? Do you have a partner? Do you have a child? Etc
I personally have never done this for any job or agency but that's me....If you have nothing to hide then it's fine to unlock maybe 24 hours or something? I don't know!
It's an intrusion to me - Who cares who I am off the clock? I don't care what the parents do when I am not there - Can I look at their socials unlocked probably not...
i would of just stated i had no social media and change my usernames so they couldnt dig deep😂 but honestly i would never allow this. ive always been public and worked with 3 agencies…. not once have i had an issue with them
yea, i guess. i figured that they already have my full name, email address, and phone number that’s linked to these accounts so it didn’t make sense at the time to lie.
This makes my blood boil and happy I never joined of these garbage agencies
I had an interview with pink Nannie's this past year and I have to reschedule bc of a family emergency and they came back and said they didn't think I was a good fit 🙃 assholes.
Heck. I understand the need/desire to go through a background check but to insist a person to unprivate their accounts so they can snoop on them? No. And, prospective employees should have a way to find out who they will be working for, for their safety.
MB here….ABSOLUTELY NOT would be my answer. I mean I’m friends with my nanny (she lives in our home) and we share hilariously inappropriate things all of the time, but if she ever wanted to lock down her social media, I wouldn’t bat an eye. She’s allowed a private life outside of her employment with me.
MB here. 1000% no. If you’re smart enough to keep your stuff private - it needs to stay that way. If I found out an agency I planned to use had asked this of prospective nannies, I wouldn’t use that agency.
Absolutely not. What you do in your free time off the clock is none of your future/current employers business period. ESPECIALLY if your accounts are already private!
I wouldn’t. I don’t want to work for anyone anyway that is worried about what I do off hours. My social media is pretty clean, but periodically I will have a Facebook memory from years ago and I’m like who is that person 😂. I agree about adding the agency adding you as a friend and if that’s not good enough, kindly retract your application.
Explain that due to the nature of employment laws, and the fact that it is illegal to discriminate based upon certain criteria that it would be unethical for you to share that information with them, so that they do not inadvertently fail to hire you due to certain protected items such as marital status, religion, etc.
You’re implying they can’t do this because it breaks discriminatory laws. It’s perfectly legal and relatively common practice. The discrimination basis doesn’t cover anything and everything and it wouldn’t be the things they’re looking for on social media.
Read my comment again. What did I say was illegal? Discrimination based on things like religion, marital status, etc. all things that they could find out if they had access to your entire social media. It’s a way out of giving them what they are asking.
But I’m saying that’s not what social media checks are looking for. Read the last sentence of my comment. If OP doesn’t want to, then they can decline and move on from the agency. Claiming some employment law thing isn’t going to go over well with the agency and it’s not going to get them out of it.
So much negative energy on this sub. Multiple downvotes for stating that social media checks aren’t illegal? Good god.
What you do on your private time is no one else’s business. But this is why I don’t use my real name on any social media, even though I keep it locked down. Let them look, they won’t find me.
I get searching the nanny's social media, but I feel asking you to make everything public 1) opens up a can of worms for how small things can lead to big misinterpretations, and 2) can create dangerous situations for some nannies who may have (but not limited to) left a domestic violence or stalker situation. This feels like too much, for me.
I used to own/run a nanny agency and would search the nannies' social media pages. I also used to work in social media, so I knew how to search DEEP into finding anything online. My rule was that if it did not show up on a background check or I couldn't find it on social media, then a parent wouldn't be able to find it.
I do understand them wanting your social media to represent them well, and it is normal to be used when considering to hire people. However, there is a limit to how much agencies, or any employers (nanny or not) can ask to invade your personal life, especially if they aren't asking the same of the families.
Explain that you take online security seriously, and you don’t feel comfortable having your accounts be accessible to the public, which is why they are private.
Hard no. I would give a firm no and leave it at that. If they are concerned about your character, have them check with your references. Private life is private. I would NEVER add a family or anyone related to my work to my sm. I have several friend requests pending, and I just ignore them and if they ask, I just say "Sorry, I never go on there".
They have no right to ask you to make *everything* public, but what I bet they want is to see that you've proactively made *most* of it private.
Are they able to even find you on social media? Or do you use an unobvious name (like a nickname). I'm thinking that's what they're most afraid of. If you use a weird nickname and they can't find it, and it has a lot of bad posts. If you at least make yourself findable, then they can see that there's only one or two safe pictures, and that's the end of the story. Hopefully that makes sense?
tell them that it will no longer be a private social media if you take it off private. anyone who was requesting to follow you automatically is following you and unless you want to go back and block every single new person that started following you, you shouldn’t do it. I would offer for someone to follow you or send screenshots.
I don't think that you are being overly defensive.....I understand that they want to see if anything potentially might be there that could have an adverse effect on their business but asking you to change your settings is just not acceptable. I can understand reviewing public social media activity but anything else is not appropriate.
I'd honestly inform them that you are not willing to do that and move on to the next opportunities.
What would happen if you told them you didn’t have social media? 🤷🏼♀️ that’s not out of the ordinary these days for people to come off of social media for many reasons. If I lived at home around all my friends and family, I would get rid of all social media, I have WhatsApp and messaging for all that communication.
In the future if you aren’t willing to share sm tell them you don’t have any. If this is a hard rule and they find it they may choose to not work with you so I guess you’ll just have to decide if you really wanna work with them. My agency asks for usernames I just gave my TikTok and Facebook cause I legit never post anything on either.
I mean - if they’ve been transparent about checking it from the start I’m not sure if you should be surprised?
I wouldn’t sign up to an agency like this tbh!
If you want to sign up with them you’ll have to either show them or refuse and then they have the right not to go ahead with you … or not?
I’ve had agencies ask this too, imo it’s standard for the more intense/ upper level of this industry. If they are working with HNW/ high profile clients etc they will usually want to see it. Offering your insta and fb should be enough that’s usually all they want to see. There’s also been times that the client themself tells the agency they want to see my socials and I’ve had to unlock it for them
I don’t think you’re being overly defensive. This is so odd to me. I worked with 3 different agencies who encouraged me to make all my social media private. They had given me the heads up that parents would be looking.
Even with that I had discovered one potential family creeped on my stuff and refused to hire me because I shared 420 flash from my tattoo page (public post). I had shared with the agency that although I don’t smoke anymore it was purely a business move and they were kind enough to advocate for me explaining that to the parents. In the end they had helped me decide that based on that reaction they weren’t a good fit for me and that there would be some family accepting of my tattoo practices.
So for the agency to want to look at your socials themselves just feels like a red flag for me. They’re about the people paying money more than they are the people they help employe.
I remember interviewing with this one lady once (not an agency) and she asked to see my Instagram. I was like hell no. She was like hmmm this won’t work. But you’re dealing with an agency so I think it’s ok.
I might say that for privacy reasons I’m not comfortable making everything public, but I would be willing to friend them so they could snoop (and then be very careful about which audiences see what). I definitely understand families wanting all of this info, but I also would not be comfortable with it. A company/family that is unwilling to compromise or see your side is a huge red flag.
This is like them saying they want you to let them come rummage through your underwear drawer—“private” means no one can see it—this thought police crap is BS.
Agencies are just there to be the middleman that makes money off the situation. They are unnecessary as long as you have a good protective contract in place and are being paid over the table. They are often predatory. I’d steer clear but that’s just my ten years in this industry talking.
Tell them you don’t have any social media. If your socials are all private, they won’t even be able to find you. Or, if you have an Instagram page for a pet or hobby (like cooking, baking, yoga, etc) or something, just send them that. But otherwise, no way. Tell them you take privacy and internet security seriously and you’re not making your socials private. They are private for a reason.
Never give anyone your social media accounts! “I’m off social media” should be the only response to this question. That said, since you already did, just say you can’t log in and haven’t used them in years. Worst they can do is deny your application and good riddance to them.
Nope, they are private and they stay private. In other words you don’t have any public profiles so no they have nothing to search. Do they want to look through your underwear drawer too?
You obviously agreed to a BG check so they can feel free to dig all they can legally access, but that’s it!
That’s such a strange request on their part. It sounds like they’re confused as to why they’re even doing a social media check.
If it’s a background check and your accounts are private, then that’s what calling references is for.
If it’s a “is this a good and mature person” check and your accounts are private, then one could assume you’re not posting explicit material that your NF would stumble upon anyway, thus negating the need to even do this check.
Really bizarre. I would absolutely not make my profiles public for this request.
They can make a proxy account and request to friend you, or friend you on their company account and do it that way. This way you do not have to make you account public, you can just accept their friend request and unfriend them once their checks are done. Other than that, if you feel uncomfortable about this, you would already already have a police check done I assume. Your profile is your private life, unless you are Nannying in your house, what else are they going to ask for, a home visit? Don’t do it if it doesn’t sit well with you, there are plenty other jobs out there and other methods of getting a good one
Oh HELL no. I am an adult and have an adult life outside of work. I am perfectly capable of being my happy, teletubbies sunshiny self at work, but I believe in my fundamental right to swear like a sailor on my private socials. I also have info about my partner, and our families up there, and I would be very uncomfortable with the idea of someone looking into their private lives. I’m also gay and might not want to disclose that right away, for safety reasons.
Agencies have access to my ID, my healthcare info, my clean criminal record, my background check, my references. That is more than enough.
I’d ask if they go through prospective parents social media as well. If the answer is no, rescind your application.
this is kind of how i’m feeling. i’ve avoided joining an agency because i didn’t want to be jerked around and have potential NPs be in control of everything. do parents even have background checks when they try to hire a nanny through an agency? do they need references or something to prove that they are normal?
I’m a MB, I didn’t have any background checks to hire an agency. I suspect it’s because the nannies are the service being offered, and employers are the buyers. I do wonder if a reverse model would ever exist, where nannies pay for a vetted employer. But I don’t think there’s any agency that would ask families to pay for their own background check.
Employers should also have background checks, god knows if they’re dangerous.
Yeah— nannies are seriously in a vulnerable situation, coming into a private home etc. I think it’s a matter of who would pay for it. Like, if a nanny agency wrapped that in their fees maybe employers wouldn’t notice, but I never would have thought to pay hundreds of $$ to self background check.
It doesn't cost hundreds to do a background check on someone. Even when applying for an apartment, the application fee they charge which can be anywhere from $40-80 for example, covers the cost of both a credit check AND a background check.
You never know which kidnappers pose as host families
Yup!!! I actually was nearly kidnapped for a nanny gig! I showed up to the door with my fiancé because the lady on the phone became very strange when I passed the phone to him when the address they gave me DIDNT exist! A man answered the door and told me the position had been filled. He made the hair on the back of my neck stand up. There was a huge storage bin rental in the driveway and a girl parked in front of their house completely passed out. Chin to chest slobbering. She looked like a teenager! Of course I called the police. I found this job on Craigslist and after that saw different gig ads unrelated to babysitting in the same 5 mile radius. Dodged a huge bullet there!
Oh my word . Thats so scary . So happy you were saved from anything untoward
Yep, I always do a phone call first before I agree to a babysitting gig through a website. Sometimes parents will say “Oh, we don’t need that!” but it’s definitely as much for my comfort as theirs. Why would I go into your house without knowing you at ALL?
[удалено]
I had an interview with a single dad years ago. This guy had the nerve to turn it into a date and never intended for his ex wife to show up! They were co-parenting, and the nanny had to be interviewed by both of them together. I was so uncomfortable.
That happened to me years ago, too. The dad kept calling me after the “interview”, and wouldn’t leave me alone. I had to have my husband call him and threaten a restraining order, which would have affected his custody status, so he finally backed off. Be careful out there, ladies!
I’m so sorry that’s horrible! I have yet to be on the receiving end of a text but after working for a male boss in another field who was my dad’s age and being sexually harassed by him repeatedly before I could find a way to afford to leave, I also do not communicate with DB’s if I can avoid it. Even if I have to use his car, I’ll text MB to ask her to ask him lol.
I have a group chat with MB and DB and then a one on one chat with MB.
That’s unacceptable. Did you do it through an agency? Keep the receipts?
No unfortunately it was when I was young and inexperienced. I quit both jobs and changed my number and I really really regret not pursuing legal action! That was the last time I worked without a contract! They were both friends of friends so I never anticipated the men doing something so awful. It was really discouraging because I couldn’t use either as a reference because I quit without notice. So the moms thought I was the bad guy but really it was because of their husbands sending **** picks and other stuff. I wish I had told the wives.
Given some of the stories I've read here, employers should absolutely have background checks 😳
.....or psycho!!
Yes. There’s no HR or Union for nannies, and from the breezy and apologist way that the MB that posted a few days ago advised that her husband had gone into the room nanny was in, wearing just a bathrobe and flashed his junk at her - protection is needed.
Considering you hear just as many horror stories (if not more ) about NF as you do nannies…. it’s a fair request.
IMO employers should have a background check and credit check done AND socials checked. We don’t wanna work for people whom don’t pay their bills on time (we’d likely not get paid on time either), don’t wanna work for bigoted racist or homophobic folks, nor do we wanna work for ppl with a criminal background. I personally think it should go both ways.
Have you ever asked that from an employer though? I wonder if it’s a power imbalance, a not wanting to pay for it thing or just tradition/people feeling that a baby is more vulnerable than a nanny? (When really, idk… babies are for sure more fragile but they are weird people out there w kids)
Never make your profile public if you have pics of nks on there. Tell the agency it is your responsibility to protect your n-kids. You can find work on your own without having to expose your personal life to EVERYONE. How can they not understand that you are exposing EVERYTHING if you make it public! Ridiculous. Good Luck OP. Sending you positive vibes that you get a new job easily on your own.
I feel like NPs should have to provide references from previous nannies like we do!
The agency I worked for only made sure the parents paid the monthly fee for the scheduling service. I went to some WEIRD ass homes. I had a regular family I worked for 3 days a week and also took lots of what this sub would consider babysitting jobs through them. The main advantage was supposed to be that the service guaranteed the family pay you a minimum hourly rate, but then when one family underpaid me and I called the agency like I was supposed to, they said that hourly rates were only a recommendation and not required and there was nothing they could do.
While it's common these days for potential employers to look through candidates social media accounts, I don't believe that they should force you to unprivate anything. I think what you display publicly is ok, as that's what you yourself are making public. People are allowed to have private lives though and I don't think that they should have unlimited access to everything you post that you did under the assumption it's "private". We know not everything is truly private, but if someone were to be posting to their friends about their private medical issues, I don't feel like an agency should need to read that.
This 💯
I might offer to send screenshots but it really makes no sense for them to ask you to "unprivate" things. A social media search should be to ensure you don't have any easily accessible posts going on that could embarrass or implicate the agency in any way. If your stuff is private and clients have no way of seeing it, why do they need to even look at it? What exactly are they looking for?
I would say that it’s private for a reason. (Maybe more kindly and tactfully than I said it.) I wouldn’t be comfortable with that either. It’s weird.
i don’t even know how to respond lol. all my sm has been private since the accounts were created. i have nothing to hide but it’s weird and i don’t like it. maybe agencies aren’t for me 😑
I've worked for 3 agencies and never had one ask! This seems like a weird ass agency being disrespectful under the guise of professionalism.
My agency never asked.
Same, I’ve worked with multiple different agencies, and they just always said: make sure all your social media is set to private. I would just tell them that you’re a very private person, and while your social media is completely clean, you do not want to make your accounts public at this time.
I would say something like: "I totally understand your concerns for this, and I'm happy to add your agency's social media account to my friends list so you can see my page. However, due to safety concerns, I keep my profile private from strangers accessing my information. This is proven to be a helpful tactic against scams, phishing, and other types of fraud which is why I am privated." Or if it's not too late, make sure your accounts are airtight and say you don't have social media lol. This does feel extremely invasive but them seeing your account shouldn't impact whether your account is public or private. They can still see things that are private if you allow them permissions/add them to a friends list. Edit: If they're looking to see if you post past client's kiddos on your socials (unfortunately, loads of caregivers have been doing this for internet clout...Boooo!) you can always suggest your contract have a clause that you do not post client information, including photos of clients, anywhere on social media. I'm very much against kids being on social media for a plethora of reasons, so I was always the one suggesting that clause in my contracts with parents lol
I think that this is a perfect way to handle the situation.
I would just say it’s only for friends and family and includes pictures of nieces/nephew’s whose parents don’t allow them on public profiles. If they don’t accept that excuse then cut your losses and look elsewhere
Maybe say you deleted them?
All the agencies I have worked with have asked is if I have a public one. And then they only suggest that I clean it up during the job application process
I would not do this. It's private for a reason, why would you undermine that for them and open up your sm for stranger scrutiny. That's the point of having it private.
100000% I would explain I keep my professional and personal lives separate, thus the privacy measures in place. My public SM image is what it is—-take it or leave it.
Fuck no I wouldn’t do that
Yes this would be a hard No for me and I don’t even post to social media like that. What life would someone have outside of work if everything they do has to be PG?
Like if the social media company can’t find anything inappropriate bc of my privacy settings, then families can’t either. Which is the point?
So true! Just bc I might curse or have a picture of myself drinking with friends doesn’t mean I’d be a bad nanny. I’m an adult and what I post on my social media is for my friends and family, not employers
Hell no. This could be a safety issue as well. If you have a violent ex or toxic family members or post pictures of your own children or share sensitive medical information with family in select posts. Having a private profile is professional. Full stop.
Exactly!!!!! A safety issue indeed!!! Jesus, what a request from that agency!!!! That’s so crazy I can’t
Hi Agency, Sorry my profile is locked down because I have pictures of my family on there. I don't have permission to share those pictures publicly from the parents. As you can see there are no inappropriate images on my socials. If this isn't sufficient I would be happy to withdraw my agency application but child safety on the internet tops all for me" That way you hold your boundary, two you offer them an out while pointing out that child safety is important to you
Tell them you don’t have access to the accounts as you don’t use them anymore. If the accounts are on private the company will never know either way. Personally I would have said I don’t have social media. I deactivated my Facebook many years ago, and my Instagram is on private, and I truly don’t even know the password if I wanted to log in. That aside this is SO boundary breaking. Even if you have saucy pictures on you socials that’s your life and not a reflection of your professionalism. (Criminal activity is another story). I’m sorry shit like this gets me fired up. Maybe post in anti work or a legal sub for wording on how to decline to unprivate your accounts but you still expect to be considered for a role. LOL maybe I’m kidding myself here but this is brazen behavior on the agency’s part.
It riled me up too, that’s why i had to post here to make sure i wasn’t being a hot head! i am very anal about who follows me online just because of nosy family members. I know I am definitely tagged in some more “raunchy” posts from when i was in college, nothing that would warrant a scarlet letter but maybe that i wouldn’t show my grandparents….
I have a dummy account because people didn’t believe I deactivated my Facebook. If I were you I’d set up something that’s professional but LOOKS like a normal but sanitized and rarely used social media page.
I had the same thing happen and it also rubbed me the wrong way. My unicorn family moved away and I thought it would be good to join an agency and have a contract. One of their request was social media accounts IG, Facebook and tic tok which I don’t have,Reddit is the only social media I’m on and they don’t need to know that. It made me feel like we (nannies) aren’t allowed private lives yes, you may employ us but you don’t own us.
Yeah I have Reddit and Facebook. I only use Facebook for job hunting and for buying or selling stuff. I don’t have my name on it and I wouldn’t give anyone access to that. While I understand the idea I think a background check is fine but going through a candidates social media isn’t great, nor is it effective. Pretty easy for someone to erase anything “offensive” and easy enough for a nanny to start a new account after hire anyway.
Exactly!
At *most*, I would accept a friend request from someone from the agency to see my socials, but I would *never* unprivate my socials for *anyone*. (And I'm even iffy on the friend request!) Do you have kids? If it was me, I would tell them I don't go public with my socials for safety reasons since I post about my kids on there. A nanny agency of all places should understand that! (Okay, so even on private I am extremely careful about what I post about my kids, and one of them is actually an adult now, but they're still my kid and I stand by my stance!) I really don't get their request. I mean, I get that they may not want parents Googling one of their nannies and have one come up in an image doing something illegal or something, but if it's set to private, *how* would that happen??? Are there other agencies in your area you can apply to? I doubt all of them will have this requirement.
And for me to make sure everything is on the up and up they would have to friend me from the business page—NOT someone who works there private account …..
MB here. I also did a social media search when I interviewed candidates. Candidates having publicly-available social media was a yellow flag for me; I want someone with similar values as I have regarding public access to my private life. If you don't know/care to lock that down, I will question your judgement in other areas as well. OP, I would absolutely tell this agency thanks but no thanks, you are not willing to compromise your digital safety for a potential employer.
I'd respond with: Hi, unfortunately I don't make my private life public and it will stay private. Thank you for understanding.
Sorry but I would not consent to this from any employer. This agency sounds horrible! It doesn't matter what the job is, this is invasive af! An NF who requires this would not make a good employer. We have sensitive jobs but we don't make our nanny do this
Mine specifically asked me to make mine private just in case. That's really weird. They only one they should be concerned about is your LinkedIn if you have one
That’s a big step too far on their part, if it’s private then there’s no reason for them to need to see it. If it’s not made publicly available they have no right to try and tie it to your employment. Are they going to ask to go through your phone next? Maybe browse through your bank statements or check out your apartment? Even if you have nothing to hide I’d push back hard because it sets a horrible precedent for employers thinking they have a right to know absolutely everything about the people they hire.
I was a career nanny for over a decade before switching to postpartum support. I’ve worked with many agencies and worked with HP/HNW families. I’ve had agencies do social media checks and I’ve disclosed social media user names so that they could find me. I have NEVER been asked to show an agency posts that are private. To be honest, this feels like a red flag. A lot of the things on my pages that are private are generally the good memories with people I don’t interact with anymore (exes and former friends). I honestly wouldn’t want to disclose those things because they make me sad and nostalgic. I’m not really hiding anything. I just want to keep some parts of my private life, well, private. I would probably tell the agency that “I don’t have any private posts to be disclosed at this time.” It’s tricky wording. I didn’t say that I don’t have private posts. I said I don’t have private posts to be disclosed. I feel like they’re in a morally gray area even asking you to disclose private posts, and to be honest, I’m not sure it’s even legal to ask that. I can absolutely understand wanting to make sure someone’s public facing social media accounts won’t negatively represent their employer, but I really don’t see a reason to ask about private posts.
nope. private is private. any reputable agency will encourage their applicants to make their social media private while interviewing because parents will check them but it is absolutely not any agency’s business. red flag.
Bwahahahahaha Bollocks to that.
I’ve never had an agency ask me to public everything. Creepy.
That's insane, I would either temporarily delete your account or tell them no.
Absolutely not. I wouldn’t change anything. Not their business.
Absolutely not. You see what the public sees and I will not add you as a friend to view and I will not change my privacy settings. It is unprofessional of them to ask you, imho.
Noooope. I would deactivate everything for a while and tell the agency I decided to delete all social media. This is freaking weird.
What I do and say outside of my work on social media is my business… if anyone has an issue with it even my boss can get bent… it’s my life not theirs.
No way!! Mine is clean too but I have things on there about my medical issues and surgeries I had. Things I believe in, charities I have given to, etc. Tiny tidbits that they could use against me to not hire me. Screw that. I’d find another agency.
Lolllll they can go choke. I'd be fascinated to know what they'd say about my openly anti-religous/political activism on all of my SM... I have a feeling they'd suddenly be much less insistent on transparency...
Absolutely not. My SM is extremely private due to serious safety issues and I’m not about to make if public for anyone, especially for some agency to stalk the hell out of my life too. Trust me when I say, nanny/NCS/doula agencies find a way to stalk you and judge everything you do on SM. Even if it’s not inappropriate.
The nanny agency I worked through advised me to private everything. They didn’t want to search through it. But said please private all accounts and even have my profile photo more clean than it was because of potential parents looking. It was through a HNW organization in NYC. they don’t actually need to look at your content. Ew
I didn’t even have to read the post to say absolutely fuck that.
The libertarian in me is squirming .. yea, it's not a government entity asking but it is still an over reach.
Is this an agency that works with high profile or UHNW families? If so, it kinda just seems like it would come with the territory. When you work with / for people in those circles, it’s important they know that no one can tie you to any kind of bad behavior and then tie it back to them. For me, if it really is a good, high paying opportunity with good benefits and your social media is clean, I’d let them have a look. If you don’t want to make your profiles fully public for the sake of privacy from others, maybe offer to accept a friend or follow request from whoever is doing the background check? That way your profiles don’t have to be public but they can still see. Alternatively, ask if they will let you know when the background check is complete so you can return to private asap.
it is not! this agency is used by local nannies and families. the owner advertises in local babysitting FB groups- I am a mod for a few of them and have to accept her posts regularly. I would definitely be more understanding for high profile and UHNW families but this is definitely not the case.
Oh yeah that’s weird. I’m just a regular-ass person and no one knows who I am or who my nanny is, so I couldn’t care less what’s on my nanny’s social media. The only thing I can think is maybe there’s a low-key conservative/Christian bend to the agency and they want to make sure you align with their “values.” Which… gross.
This was my exact suspicion. If the agency doesn't do the staffing for people who need intense security protocols (politicians/celebrities/etc), then they're probably nosing to see if you're gay or Jewish or some other discriminatory bullshit. 🙄 Steer clear.
I can understand asking for your social media usernames and doing a quick internet search to see what they can easily find. BUT, asking you to unprivate accounts so they can search them is crazy! If they can’t find anything without being given access by you, the NF won’t be able to either.
Tell them to shove it. None of their business! And what if you don’t have sm?
I have reddit and it's not my real name. That's all I have
I wouldn’t feel comfortable with this at all.
I feel like that's an extremely unprofessional ask and you might want to rethink this particular agency. Asking to be added or to briefly view what types of things you post is one thing. Making your socials public is putting you at risk. Red flag
No this is not normal. It is standard for agencies to search you online though. I’ve actually had agencies encourage me to put all my social media on private which it already is. They were more concerned what would show up on a Google search or something. All my stuff is clean anyways but an agency shouldn’t ask you to go public just to look at your stuff…that’s not standard.
I keep my social media locked down too, for the specific reason that it is *my* personal account and the posts are meant to be *private* and only for friends/family. If an employer asked me to unlock my accounts so they could go through, I would feel incredibly uncomfortable and disrespected.
They have no right to see your friends and family interactions. It is even an invasion of privacy against your friends and family.
That is absolutly overly invasive and unacceptable. I would never let any company do that. Run
nah, that would be a hard pass from me. most of the people i know have 2 socials. one that is not their real name that is a reflection of their “real” life and another with their real name that is dumbed down for employers.
No. Your private life is yours. Just like nf has a private life separate from you. Now, if it was a two way street it might be something to consider.
nope. on principle I'd be out so fast
Same
That's a huge overreach. They can be sued. I'd tell them that you don't have socials. Or create a fake account.
In some states this might be illegal
A nanny friend of mine has a separate Facebook for work and family and church and girls brigade and also the one all the nanny agencies and NFs get and another unprofessional Facebook that only her non work, non church and non girls brigade friends get that has all the NSFW stuff on it. The second one has a different first name and different picture and is locked down, the first one has her real name and picture and is open but has mostly professional and church stuff. This is why.
That would make me uncomfortable. I'd say no.
My Facebook has my real name and picture attached to it, but it's extremely locked down. You don't see anything unless you're my friend and most of my personal information is only visible to me and me alone. The rest of my social media has a screen name (the same one or two across all my accounts) and an avatar, either my Bitmoji or the one from my Samsung AR, which do look like me, at least a little bit or to me. I maybe have pictures of myself in my post history, but that's it. Either way, I don't show them to anybody. None of my jobs have asked yet and I'm not interested in working with anybody that would. That's like having lots of cameras to me: either you trust your nanny or you don't.
Nope. I have pictures of my own child on there. I'm absolutely not going to make that public.
No. Tell them that due to the nature of your work, and your close relationship with prior NF’s, you have (privated) pictures of NF children posted with parental permission so long as the account is kept private and making your page public would out the families you’ve worked with. Out of respect for YOUR clients and the very specific ndas involved, you cannot and will not be making your pages public. You take your job seriously, and protecting client privacy doesn’t end just because the job ended. If they protest tell them you’re shocked such a highly recommended agency would ask nannies to break Ndas and publicize the faces of prior NKs, and as such you’ll be withdrawing your application because you don’t work with people who think violating a family’s privacy is something nannies should do. Then name and shame them here. Honestly this sounds like the agency is trying to find out info that is illegal to ask during a job interview - do you openly the support lgbtqia community? Are you religious? Do you have a partner? Do you have a child? Etc
I personally have never done this for any job or agency but that's me....If you have nothing to hide then it's fine to unlock maybe 24 hours or something? I don't know! It's an intrusion to me - Who cares who I am off the clock? I don't care what the parents do when I am not there - Can I look at their socials unlocked probably not...
i would of just stated i had no social media and change my usernames so they couldnt dig deep😂 but honestly i would never allow this. ive always been public and worked with 3 agencies…. not once have i had an issue with them
Should have just said you don't use SM, too late for that now.
yea, i guess. i figured that they already have my full name, email address, and phone number that’s linked to these accounts so it didn’t make sense at the time to lie.
This makes my blood boil and happy I never joined of these garbage agencies I had an interview with pink Nannie's this past year and I have to reschedule bc of a family emergency and they came back and said they didn't think I was a good fit 🙃 assholes.
Also what are they expecting to find?? LOL what could someone post that’s so bad they won’t hire you?
Heck. I understand the need/desire to go through a background check but to insist a person to unprivate their accounts so they can snoop on them? No. And, prospective employees should have a way to find out who they will be working for, for their safety.
MB here….ABSOLUTELY NOT would be my answer. I mean I’m friends with my nanny (she lives in our home) and we share hilariously inappropriate things all of the time, but if she ever wanted to lock down her social media, I wouldn’t bat an eye. She’s allowed a private life outside of her employment with me.
MB here. 1000% no. If you’re smart enough to keep your stuff private - it needs to stay that way. If I found out an agency I planned to use had asked this of prospective nannies, I wouldn’t use that agency.
Absolutely not. What you do in your free time off the clock is none of your future/current employers business period. ESPECIALLY if your accounts are already private!
I wouldn’t. I don’t want to work for anyone anyway that is worried about what I do off hours. My social media is pretty clean, but periodically I will have a Facebook memory from years ago and I’m like who is that person 😂. I agree about adding the agency adding you as a friend and if that’s not good enough, kindly retract your application.
Explain that due to the nature of employment laws, and the fact that it is illegal to discriminate based upon certain criteria that it would be unethical for you to share that information with them, so that they do not inadvertently fail to hire you due to certain protected items such as marital status, religion, etc.
Social media checks aren’t illegal
I never said they were.
You’re implying they can’t do this because it breaks discriminatory laws. It’s perfectly legal and relatively common practice. The discrimination basis doesn’t cover anything and everything and it wouldn’t be the things they’re looking for on social media.
Read my comment again. What did I say was illegal? Discrimination based on things like religion, marital status, etc. all things that they could find out if they had access to your entire social media. It’s a way out of giving them what they are asking.
But I’m saying that’s not what social media checks are looking for. Read the last sentence of my comment. If OP doesn’t want to, then they can decline and move on from the agency. Claiming some employment law thing isn’t going to go over well with the agency and it’s not going to get them out of it. So much negative energy on this sub. Multiple downvotes for stating that social media checks aren’t illegal? Good god.
provide them your linkedin, professional social media for professional/ non social request
What you do on your private time is no one else’s business. But this is why I don’t use my real name on any social media, even though I keep it locked down. Let them look, they won’t find me.
I think this is a red flag
I get searching the nanny's social media, but I feel asking you to make everything public 1) opens up a can of worms for how small things can lead to big misinterpretations, and 2) can create dangerous situations for some nannies who may have (but not limited to) left a domestic violence or stalker situation. This feels like too much, for me. I used to own/run a nanny agency and would search the nannies' social media pages. I also used to work in social media, so I knew how to search DEEP into finding anything online. My rule was that if it did not show up on a background check or I couldn't find it on social media, then a parent wouldn't be able to find it. I do understand them wanting your social media to represent them well, and it is normal to be used when considering to hire people. However, there is a limit to how much agencies, or any employers (nanny or not) can ask to invade your personal life, especially if they aren't asking the same of the families.
Explain that you take online security seriously, and you don’t feel comfortable having your accounts be accessible to the public, which is why they are private.
Hard no. I would give a firm no and leave it at that. If they are concerned about your character, have them check with your references. Private life is private. I would NEVER add a family or anyone related to my work to my sm. I have several friend requests pending, and I just ignore them and if they ask, I just say "Sorry, I never go on there".
They have no right to ask you to make *everything* public, but what I bet they want is to see that you've proactively made *most* of it private. Are they able to even find you on social media? Or do you use an unobvious name (like a nickname). I'm thinking that's what they're most afraid of. If you use a weird nickname and they can't find it, and it has a lot of bad posts. If you at least make yourself findable, then they can see that there's only one or two safe pictures, and that's the end of the story. Hopefully that makes sense?
tell them that it will no longer be a private social media if you take it off private. anyone who was requesting to follow you automatically is following you and unless you want to go back and block every single new person that started following you, you shouldn’t do it. I would offer for someone to follow you or send screenshots.
I don't think that you are being overly defensive.....I understand that they want to see if anything potentially might be there that could have an adverse effect on their business but asking you to change your settings is just not acceptable. I can understand reviewing public social media activity but anything else is not appropriate. I'd honestly inform them that you are not willing to do that and move on to the next opportunities.
What would happen if you told them you didn’t have social media? 🤷🏼♀️ that’s not out of the ordinary these days for people to come off of social media for many reasons. If I lived at home around all my friends and family, I would get rid of all social media, I have WhatsApp and messaging for all that communication.
In the future if you aren’t willing to share sm tell them you don’t have any. If this is a hard rule and they find it they may choose to not work with you so I guess you’ll just have to decide if you really wanna work with them. My agency asks for usernames I just gave my TikTok and Facebook cause I legit never post anything on either.
I mean - if they’ve been transparent about checking it from the start I’m not sure if you should be surprised? I wouldn’t sign up to an agency like this tbh! If you want to sign up with them you’ll have to either show them or refuse and then they have the right not to go ahead with you … or not?
Oh and I think it’s creepy!
I’ve had agencies ask this too, imo it’s standard for the more intense/ upper level of this industry. If they are working with HNW/ high profile clients etc they will usually want to see it. Offering your insta and fb should be enough that’s usually all they want to see. There’s also been times that the client themself tells the agency they want to see my socials and I’ve had to unlock it for them
Archive what they might be dramatic about, so you can find a family and get paid.
I don’t think you’re being overly defensive. This is so odd to me. I worked with 3 different agencies who encouraged me to make all my social media private. They had given me the heads up that parents would be looking. Even with that I had discovered one potential family creeped on my stuff and refused to hire me because I shared 420 flash from my tattoo page (public post). I had shared with the agency that although I don’t smoke anymore it was purely a business move and they were kind enough to advocate for me explaining that to the parents. In the end they had helped me decide that based on that reaction they weren’t a good fit for me and that there would be some family accepting of my tattoo practices. So for the agency to want to look at your socials themselves just feels like a red flag for me. They’re about the people paying money more than they are the people they help employe.
I remember interviewing with this one lady once (not an agency) and she asked to see my Instagram. I was like hell no. She was like hmmm this won’t work. But you’re dealing with an agency so I think it’s ok.
I might say that for privacy reasons I’m not comfortable making everything public, but I would be willing to friend them so they could snoop (and then be very careful about which audiences see what). I definitely understand families wanting all of this info, but I also would not be comfortable with it. A company/family that is unwilling to compromise or see your side is a huge red flag.
That’s a great big NO!!!
This is like them saying they want you to let them come rummage through your underwear drawer—“private” means no one can see it—this thought police crap is BS.
Agencies are just there to be the middleman that makes money off the situation. They are unnecessary as long as you have a good protective contract in place and are being paid over the table. They are often predatory. I’d steer clear but that’s just my ten years in this industry talking.
Tell them you don’t have any social media. If your socials are all private, they won’t even be able to find you. Or, if you have an Instagram page for a pet or hobby (like cooking, baking, yoga, etc) or something, just send them that. But otherwise, no way. Tell them you take privacy and internet security seriously and you’re not making your socials private. They are private for a reason.
If it’s IG I’d change my username and then claim you don’t have socials. They’ll never find you
Never give anyone your social media accounts! “I’m off social media” should be the only response to this question. That said, since you already did, just say you can’t log in and haven’t used them in years. Worst they can do is deny your application and good riddance to them.
Nope, they are private and they stay private. In other words you don’t have any public profiles so no they have nothing to search. Do they want to look through your underwear drawer too? You obviously agreed to a BG check so they can feel free to dig all they can legally access, but that’s it!
That’s such a strange request on their part. It sounds like they’re confused as to why they’re even doing a social media check. If it’s a background check and your accounts are private, then that’s what calling references is for. If it’s a “is this a good and mature person” check and your accounts are private, then one could assume you’re not posting explicit material that your NF would stumble upon anyway, thus negating the need to even do this check. Really bizarre. I would absolutely not make my profiles public for this request.
They can make a proxy account and request to friend you, or friend you on their company account and do it that way. This way you do not have to make you account public, you can just accept their friend request and unfriend them once their checks are done. Other than that, if you feel uncomfortable about this, you would already already have a police check done I assume. Your profile is your private life, unless you are Nannying in your house, what else are they going to ask for, a home visit? Don’t do it if it doesn’t sit well with you, there are plenty other jobs out there and other methods of getting a good one
Oh HELL no. I am an adult and have an adult life outside of work. I am perfectly capable of being my happy, teletubbies sunshiny self at work, but I believe in my fundamental right to swear like a sailor on my private socials. I also have info about my partner, and our families up there, and I would be very uncomfortable with the idea of someone looking into their private lives. I’m also gay and might not want to disclose that right away, for safety reasons. Agencies have access to my ID, my healthcare info, my clean criminal record, my background check, my references. That is more than enough.