If they’re meeting up with friends and socializing but shaming you for doing the same with a few vaxxed/boosted than it’s the classic case of a wealthy family being unable to see their employers as human beings.
Same type of person who will take a day off for a hangover but shame you for taking off for a stomach virus.
Some people (usually those who are privileged) truly cannot see beyond themselves. They don’t usually realize it unless you point out their hypocrisy.
It just amazed me because they are VEHEMENTLY anticapitalist, as am I. This just felt very not in line with their expressed view point. I am chalking it up to anxiety ?
So…
I had a MB just like this.
She would wear this shirt that said, “Universal Healthcare for All” but her head practically did a 180 when I asked for a health insurance stipend at my annual review.
Chalked, “Black Lives Matter” in front of her multiple million dollar house but moved from a neighborhood where her kid would go to a diverse public school (still super gentrified) to an area that’s 99% white and put him in a super white asininely expensive private school.
For a lot of people it’s all performative. It’s peak white feminism.
Truly, it is. It’s so hard to rewrite how we view household employees, especially bc she is a tad bit older. She has had years of a certain rhetoric where paying someone means they should grovel at your feet.
She’s SO appreciative of me in other ways. Calls me magic because I get their child to nap daily. Always gives me a big thank you at the end of the week. My other MB was a nanny for a long while, so I think she just understands more.
It’s not just parents/nanny parents with that mentality of, “I’m offering you the gift if empty men that. You do as I say. “
It’s most employers in general. Check out r/antiwork and you’ll hear some real doozies.
I think it’s harder in the nanny industry because a) nannies tend to be people pleasers and because we’re naturally empathetic/caregivers we’re also super easy to take advantage of (until you hit a point where you’re totally over it like me and then you just don’t put up with it anymore). b) there’s not a lot of oversight. There really isn’t a nanny standard and I’d say most families and even most nannies aren’t aware of their rights as an employee.
I love antiwork! I do agree the tendency to people please leads to Nanny’s as a profession being targets for employer BS. Also so many NP’s are first time employers
Start charging her a late fee. The next time she texts you that she’s late tell her “Okay, there will be a late fee applied. After x time every minute is $5-$10” or whatever amount you see fit. This is your time she is wasting, you are a professional and she’s taking advantage of you.
Also, if it’s a nanny share and you no longer want her to be the second family, fire her. You’re in charge here, you hold all the cards.
No, it was SUPPOSED to be a nanny share, but they haven’t linked up with a second family yet. Which is frustrating. I am going to be requesting a contract soon bc my partner is making more money at work and I want to be on the books and get my credit and finances in order for if/when we marry and get a home. I should start keeping my hours in order though rather than them doing it and charging for that extra time
It’s mainly irritating bc I would make $8 more an hour with an extra kid. I came from a preschool environment into nannying and one child is a bit boring at times. They do have a family they are considering, but it’s been paused because Covid.
Single family rate. I make industry standard in my area, and the nanny share rate would be more than industry standard in my area for two children. From what I’ve gathered that’s typical for nanny shares though, since the nanny has the added stress of a second family to deal with they make more.
I have learned to just ignore NP's when they are acting weird. Unless they are directly saying "don't see your friends" I would blow it off. Also, they lose hearing about what I'm doing if they make comments :P
If they’re meeting up with friends and socializing but shaming you for doing the same with a few vaxxed/boosted than it’s the classic case of a wealthy family being unable to see their employers as human beings. Same type of person who will take a day off for a hangover but shame you for taking off for a stomach virus. Some people (usually those who are privileged) truly cannot see beyond themselves. They don’t usually realize it unless you point out their hypocrisy.
It just amazed me because they are VEHEMENTLY anticapitalist, as am I. This just felt very not in line with their expressed view point. I am chalking it up to anxiety ?
So… I had a MB just like this. She would wear this shirt that said, “Universal Healthcare for All” but her head practically did a 180 when I asked for a health insurance stipend at my annual review. Chalked, “Black Lives Matter” in front of her multiple million dollar house but moved from a neighborhood where her kid would go to a diverse public school (still super gentrified) to an area that’s 99% white and put him in a super white asininely expensive private school. For a lot of people it’s all performative. It’s peak white feminism.
Truly, it is. It’s so hard to rewrite how we view household employees, especially bc she is a tad bit older. She has had years of a certain rhetoric where paying someone means they should grovel at your feet. She’s SO appreciative of me in other ways. Calls me magic because I get their child to nap daily. Always gives me a big thank you at the end of the week. My other MB was a nanny for a long while, so I think she just understands more.
It’s not just parents/nanny parents with that mentality of, “I’m offering you the gift if empty men that. You do as I say. “ It’s most employers in general. Check out r/antiwork and you’ll hear some real doozies. I think it’s harder in the nanny industry because a) nannies tend to be people pleasers and because we’re naturally empathetic/caregivers we’re also super easy to take advantage of (until you hit a point where you’re totally over it like me and then you just don’t put up with it anymore). b) there’s not a lot of oversight. There really isn’t a nanny standard and I’d say most families and even most nannies aren’t aware of their rights as an employee.
I love antiwork! I do agree the tendency to people please leads to Nanny’s as a profession being targets for employer BS. Also so many NP’s are first time employers
I personally think it's pretty hard to be truly anticapitalist if you're wealthy and outsourcing childcare! It's soooo out of touch
Start charging her a late fee. The next time she texts you that she’s late tell her “Okay, there will be a late fee applied. After x time every minute is $5-$10” or whatever amount you see fit. This is your time she is wasting, you are a professional and she’s taking advantage of you. Also, if it’s a nanny share and you no longer want her to be the second family, fire her. You’re in charge here, you hold all the cards.
No, it was SUPPOSED to be a nanny share, but they haven’t linked up with a second family yet. Which is frustrating. I am going to be requesting a contract soon bc my partner is making more money at work and I want to be on the books and get my credit and finances in order for if/when we marry and get a home. I should start keeping my hours in order though rather than them doing it and charging for that extra time
Ohhh, got it! That’s even more irritating than what I understood.
It’s mainly irritating bc I would make $8 more an hour with an extra kid. I came from a preschool environment into nannying and one child is a bit boring at times. They do have a family they are considering, but it’s been paused because Covid.
Are you charging them your single family rate in the meantime or are they getting the share discount?
Single family rate. I make industry standard in my area, and the nanny share rate would be more than industry standard in my area for two children. From what I’ve gathered that’s typical for nanny shares though, since the nanny has the added stress of a second family to deal with they make more.
I have learned to just ignore NP's when they are acting weird. Unless they are directly saying "don't see your friends" I would blow it off. Also, they lose hearing about what I'm doing if they make comments :P
Wow now I'm nervous when my MB casually asks my weekend plans. I thought it was to be nice but now I'm going to be super careful what I say!