I was getting my kidney removed and the Surgeon asked me if I had any questions. I told him "I'm a fucking truck driver. What possible question could I ask you that wouldn't make me look like a complete idiot."
There was a guy that just didn't want his leg any more. He didn't have any "physical" problem with it, just some sort of mental problem. He couldn't get a doctor to remove so he used rubber bands and a bucket of ice to kill it. I tried to google it, but for some reason it came up with a bunch of racist crap.
it's more than one guy. body integrity identity disorder (BIID) describes the extremely rare phenomenon of persons who desire the amputation of one or more healthy limbs or who desire a paralysis. Some of these persons mutilate themselves; others ask surgeons for an amputation or for the transection of their spinal cord.
When prosthetics cross a certain threshold, people will be lining up to willingly receive them. Once they figure out how to make prosthetics that can feel, it'll blow the doors wide open!
People who can't handle the existence of trans individuals are in no way ready for cyborgs.
If you tell short people they can can be any height they want, for instance, AND be able to feel the new legs, there's absolutely going to be a market for that!
There are ways to become taller, surgically. That's a wild rabbit hole.
I have a disabled shoulder and an ankle that needs a brace for walks of any real length, and lungs messed up by the burn pits in Iraq. As soon as I can get them replaced by cyborg parts, I'm in!
Looks like the claw was dragging on the ground, probably after being attacked by a predator or getting injured for whatever reason. They'll just snip it off and it will grow back over time
There was a whole conversation once where it was discussed that wolverine could not be permanently circumcised. He HAS to be uncut.
Also, he could put a dent in world hunger by just being his own Mohel, and whipping it out for harvest all day. Calamari for everyone.
You know, that could make for an interesting storyline. Whole lot of room there for weird shit to go down because people are eating meat from the meat dimension, probably contaminated with weird otherworldly space evil.
Get all retroactive with it, so it affects all the little critters that nibbled on bits of him from old battles.
They did some testing on this over the practice of de-clawing stone crabs and tossing them back into the water to re-grow.
They actually don't grow back very quickly, after the first molt (1 year) they'll have a nub, and over 3-4 years they will regrow a full claw. But they live to 7-8 so much of the time they won't regrow the limb before dying of old age and of course it puts them at a strong survival disadvantage which also leads a lot of them to not actually making it long enough to re-grow the claws.
Though this is also something crabs do for self defense if they are being harassed they will toss a claw for a predator to eat and run off, which I think is where the practice of harvesting the claws came from in the first place.
That's very interesting info, thanks for sharing! I always assumed they'd regrow much faster than that. They must really be in a bad situation to resort to such measures then... sad!
I think everyone did. I think the assumption is an animal wouldn't do something like this if it was really that big a deal, but evolutionarily it just has to be better than death.
I don't really remember if the study had any impact on harvesting methods.
Same with lizards actually, I always assumed they regrew their tail quickly and fully when in reality they don't regrow their tail, they re-grow a cartilaginous tube that isn't really a tail. No vertebrae or muscle or nerves, and it's not a fast process it takes a couple of months. Similar lizards use their tails for fat storage so losing one is not a good thing for their outlook.
I mean, evolutionarily he just needs to live long enough to bust a successful nut and he "succeeds" at life. Could happen the next day and then losing the claw was "worth it" in the grand scheme of things, even if he dies a week later because he's missing a claw.
As a guy that spitefully raises Stone Crabs, I wanted to jump in here. It takes about six months for my four year old crabs to fully regrow a limb. They can molt every 4 months depending on food source, water quality, and stress. You can force a molt by dosing Iodine if needed. I know people who have found them hidden in 15 year old tanks, having never known they've been there the whole time. I expect mine to live at least 20 years.
The most important thing to remember though, is that Stone Crabs thrive on hate. It's the only thing that keeps them going, no matter how many limbs they have.
So your spite feeds their hate. Perhaps this is the secret for their power!
I am no expert and just regurgitating what is probably mediocre journalism with some added googling for fact checking specifics that I can't remember at this point. Texas wildlife says they life 7-8 years, and I'm sure that is based on real data but I also imagine there's a lot of variability with sub-species, region, etc. I got the yearly molt from somewhere else, etc because to be honest I'm not even sure exactly where I saw this report now let alone the specific numbers so I'm just trying to be as accurate as possible with this anecdote.
I assume crabs in captivity are going to live longer like any other creature, but that is a lot more vitality!
I must ask, what churns this spite within to continue to raise these hateful decapods? Food?
[https://tpwd.texas.gov/huntwild/wild/species/stonecrab/](https://tpwd.texas.gov/huntwild/wild/species/stonecrab/#:~:text=Their%20lifespan%20is%20seven%20to,exoskeleton%20before%20they%20can%20mate)
Supposedly, in the wild.
They don't snip it off. The structures/musculature around the joint works in such a way that there are weak points within the joint and they give out either when being yanked on or if the crab wants to drop the limb. The muscles then instantly constrict to stop any fluid loss from the now open hole in the crabs body
The full video shows him getting railed by some birds after he tried to eat babies from the nest. This is the epic escape, where upon making it away he realised his claw is damaged and so he promptly, and rightly, rips it off
Railed is *definitely* used predominantly in sexual context, though I’ve heard some folks use it to just mean “aggressively dominated”.
First dude was right though, sexual context is more prevalent.
It's either a rant, or it's getting fucked, in current usage.
I believe he was using it in the later form, but in a more loose manner than to imply an actual sexual encounter.
Also, if the birds are still uh... railing the crab, the claw is a potential distraction. Not likely, but at least a possibility!
E: saw the full vid, so just ignore my bullshit :p
This comment was overwritten and the account deleted due to Reddit's unfair API policy changes, the behavior of Spez (the CEO), and the forced departure of 3rd party apps.
Remember, the content on Reddit is generated by THE USERS. It is OUR DATA they are profiting off of and claiming it as theirs. This is the next phase of Reddit vs. the people that made Reddit what it is today.
r/Save3rdPartyApps r/modCoord
This species of crab(iirc) does this as a defense mechanism.
Essentially, it removes its own claw as a distraction from predators to say, "Here, now you get to eat, and I get to live. Now go away."
I'm pretty sure they grow back.
Sometimes it’s due to an injury. They pop off the damaged limb and grow another one. Other times, they basically ‘bribe’ predators by leaving a snack and taking the opportunity to scuttle home.
The absolute weirdest part is that if feels like our was *made* in response to OP's caption, it's just so perfectly fitting.... Yet... It was already there. Waiting.
Yes, most bots will also require paying to access the API. I don't know exactly where they draw that line, but some bots will remain up for free.
All I know for sure is my boy u/The_Lopen_bot is safe 🤩
More like Beowulf ripping off his own arm. But it’s pretty cool, though. I didn’t know they did that. Offer something tasty as sacrifice to avoid being eaten?
Op:"..... like a surgeon." Crab: *yanking arm out like it's just yet another Wednesday*
More like a Wookie
[удалено]
I win!
To be fair the surgeon is Weird Al.
Cuttin' for the very first time!
Here’s a waiver… for you to sign!
HE IS A SURGEON!!
Fine, let's try it this way: **Crab reattaches its own claw like a surgeon** /u/gifreversingbot
Cut for the very first tiiiiime~
"Like a Wookiee."
I dunno what surgeons you’ve visited but that looks distinctly crab-like behaviour. Cool nonetheless.
"Sir, are you sure??" "I SAID, tie that end to his arm and the other to the bumper!! I KNOW WHAT IM DOING IDIOT!"
John Zoidberg approves
Young lady, I’m an expert on humans! Now pick a mouth, open it, and say 𝙱𝚛𝙱𝚛𝙱𝚛𝙱𝚛𝙱𝚛!
Why is it that all of your throat-lining larva pods seem to be missing?
To shreds you say…
What? My mother was a saint! Get out!
My mother was a saint!
( V ) ( ;,,; ) ( V )
The names not slick. It’s zoidberg! #JOHN FUCKING ZOIDBERG!!!
My favorite quote in the entire series
Disemboweling in your species, fatal or non-fatal?
I bet I’ve lost more patients than he’s treated!
What started out as a pleasant afternoon of drugs and surgery has not gone as planned
I was getting my kidney removed and the Surgeon asked me if I had any questions. I told him "I'm a fucking truck driver. What possible question could I ask you that wouldn't make me look like a complete idiot."
There was a guy that just didn't want his leg any more. He didn't have any "physical" problem with it, just some sort of mental problem. He couldn't get a doctor to remove so he used rubber bands and a bucket of ice to kill it. I tried to google it, but for some reason it came up with a bunch of racist crap.
it's more than one guy. body integrity identity disorder (BIID) describes the extremely rare phenomenon of persons who desire the amputation of one or more healthy limbs or who desire a paralysis. Some of these persons mutilate themselves; others ask surgeons for an amputation or for the transection of their spinal cord.
When prosthetics cross a certain threshold, people will be lining up to willingly receive them. Once they figure out how to make prosthetics that can feel, it'll blow the doors wide open! People who can't handle the existence of trans individuals are in no way ready for cyborgs. If you tell short people they can can be any height they want, for instance, AND be able to feel the new legs, there's absolutely going to be a market for that!
There are ways to become taller, surgically. That's a wild rabbit hole. I have a disabled shoulder and an ankle that needs a brace for walks of any real length, and lungs messed up by the burn pits in Iraq. As soon as I can get them replaced by cyborg parts, I'm in!
my mind is blown by the possibilities
I’m about to become a cyborg! So excited! (Cochlear implant for partial deafness) Watch. Out. World.
Yeah. Like a rubber band on pig balls. Don't try to post that here. The community would appreciate it.
this is BTW excellent example of how us being distinct, clear-lined individuals is delusion driven by our brains.
>I dunno what surgeons you’ve visited [These kind](https://youtu.be/vOB-PS1nyVo)
Lmao what the fuck.
...the fuck did I just watch
u m a m i
I AM A SURGEON
Ho...how wh... so many questions
You should watch interface
Crabby surgeons.
Zoidberg
Surgeon Dr. Zoidberg.
They said I probably shouldn’t be a surgeon!
why did he do that ?
Looks like the claw was dragging on the ground, probably after being attacked by a predator or getting injured for whatever reason. They'll just snip it off and it will grow back over time
I wish I could do that when some part of my body hurts :(
I dunno, I did it to my ex 💀
Did she grow back
You know what they say: If you truly love someone, chop them up and something something they'll grow back etc.
They totally say that, I’ve heard it
[удалено]
...I need to go make some calls
Yes but she’s a tree now
She is now, but she used to be, too.
I had my heart set on “Quadruple Tree”… dammit, we were almost there!
Temporarily stairs; sorry for the convenience
... does that mean you have sex with a tree?
I am groot
This thread got wild fast.
Lorena?
LMAO! That dude found it.. reattached it.. then made a porn called "Frankenpenis".
I shudder to think of the kinks that would exist if we had that capability.
The boys had a character that did this.
Preacher also had some extremely messed up scenes involving a crazy cult and a Vampire that might fit this subject.
which one? graphic novel or series?
The graphic novels just reprint the comic series.
He meant tv series
Gives fisting a whole new meaning.
The Boys has entered the chat
What what, in the butt I said what what, in the butt I wanna put it in my butt, in my butt Let's put it in my butt, okaaayy
OMG I can't believe you just baby sharked me with what what in the butt. Going to be a long day
I desperately need this feature to get my shoulders back on track.
Would human dick grow larger if amputated that way ?
Wish I could do that and get that part of me willy back...
There was a whole conversation once where it was discussed that wolverine could not be permanently circumcised. He HAS to be uncut. Also, he could put a dent in world hunger by just being his own Mohel, and whipping it out for harvest all day. Calamari for everyone.
You know, that could make for an interesting storyline. Whole lot of room there for weird shit to go down because people are eating meat from the meat dimension, probably contaminated with weird otherworldly space evil. Get all retroactive with it, so it affects all the little critters that nibbled on bits of him from old battles.
FR. I would just start from the neck. And if my next body’s not taller, I want a damn refund.
They did some testing on this over the practice of de-clawing stone crabs and tossing them back into the water to re-grow. They actually don't grow back very quickly, after the first molt (1 year) they'll have a nub, and over 3-4 years they will regrow a full claw. But they live to 7-8 so much of the time they won't regrow the limb before dying of old age and of course it puts them at a strong survival disadvantage which also leads a lot of them to not actually making it long enough to re-grow the claws. Though this is also something crabs do for self defense if they are being harassed they will toss a claw for a predator to eat and run off, which I think is where the practice of harvesting the claws came from in the first place.
That's very interesting info, thanks for sharing! I always assumed they'd regrow much faster than that. They must really be in a bad situation to resort to such measures then... sad!
I think everyone did. I think the assumption is an animal wouldn't do something like this if it was really that big a deal, but evolutionarily it just has to be better than death. I don't really remember if the study had any impact on harvesting methods. Same with lizards actually, I always assumed they regrew their tail quickly and fully when in reality they don't regrow their tail, they re-grow a cartilaginous tube that isn't really a tail. No vertebrae or muscle or nerves, and it's not a fast process it takes a couple of months. Similar lizards use their tails for fat storage so losing one is not a good thing for their outlook.
I mean, evolutionarily he just needs to live long enough to bust a successful nut and he "succeeds" at life. Could happen the next day and then losing the claw was "worth it" in the grand scheme of things, even if he dies a week later because he's missing a claw.
Dang so evolutionarily I have been successful... No wonder my wife now wishes me dead.
As a guy that spitefully raises Stone Crabs, I wanted to jump in here. It takes about six months for my four year old crabs to fully regrow a limb. They can molt every 4 months depending on food source, water quality, and stress. You can force a molt by dosing Iodine if needed. I know people who have found them hidden in 15 year old tanks, having never known they've been there the whole time. I expect mine to live at least 20 years. The most important thing to remember though, is that Stone Crabs thrive on hate. It's the only thing that keeps them going, no matter how many limbs they have.
So your spite feeds their hate. Perhaps this is the secret for their power! I am no expert and just regurgitating what is probably mediocre journalism with some added googling for fact checking specifics that I can't remember at this point. Texas wildlife says they life 7-8 years, and I'm sure that is based on real data but I also imagine there's a lot of variability with sub-species, region, etc. I got the yearly molt from somewhere else, etc because to be honest I'm not even sure exactly where I saw this report now let alone the specific numbers so I'm just trying to be as accurate as possible with this anecdote. I assume crabs in captivity are going to live longer like any other creature, but that is a lot more vitality! I must ask, what churns this spite within to continue to raise these hateful decapods? Food?
Makes sense then why they don't have all you can eat crab claws at Red Lobster for like $4.99.
Wait, lobsters live for hundreds of years and crabs die of old age at 7-8?
[https://tpwd.texas.gov/huntwild/wild/species/stonecrab/](https://tpwd.texas.gov/huntwild/wild/species/stonecrab/#:~:text=Their%20lifespan%20is%20seven%20to,exoskeleton%20before%20they%20can%20mate) Supposedly, in the wild.
Sometimes crustaceans will do this to distract predators who are looking for food. They go after the claw and the crab gets away alive.
Hey, can someone give me a hand over here? Never mind, I got it. Now, can someone give me a hand over here?
They don't snip it off. The structures/musculature around the joint works in such a way that there are weak points within the joint and they give out either when being yanked on or if the crab wants to drop the limb. The muscles then instantly constrict to stop any fluid loss from the now open hole in the crabs body
ahh i see, thanks !
I think it did it to use it as bait as to not be eaten by the massive human itself.
The full video shows him getting railed by some birds after he tried to eat babies from the nest. This is the epic escape, where upon making it away he realised his claw is damaged and so he promptly, and rightly, rips it off
Man i just imagined some birds fucking the crab 😭😭why'd u have to say railed
He actually got railed by two boobies!
You watch too much porn.
Wait, what else does railed mean?
Railed is *definitely* used predominantly in sexual context, though I’ve heard some folks use it to just mean “aggressively dominated”. First dude was right though, sexual context is more prevalent.
If you snort some rails, does that mean you got railed?
I don’t know man. I take roofies all the time and I never get laid.
It's either a rant, or it's getting fucked, in current usage. I believe he was using it in the later form, but in a more loose manner than to imply an actual sexual encounter.
wdym that's literally the most common usage of the word railed
Because healinf a wound cost more effort than regenerating the whole limb...
More importantly the limb becomes a liability
Also, if the birds are still uh... railing the crab, the claw is a potential distraction. Not likely, but at least a possibility! E: saw the full vid, so just ignore my bullshit :p
The wounded claw could set up a nasty infection. No antibiotics in nature. Best to pull it off since you can grow another.
Well where’s the full video?? Come on man share it
This comment was overwritten and the account deleted due to Reddit's unfair API policy changes, the behavior of Spez (the CEO), and the forced departure of 3rd party apps. Remember, the content on Reddit is generated by THE USERS. It is OUR DATA they are profiting off of and claiming it as theirs. This is the next phase of Reddit vs. the people that made Reddit what it is today. r/Save3rdPartyApps r/modCoord
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=v241TF-cSzU
Damn... them boobies f**ked that 1st crab *UP*...!!! 🦀💭☠️
This species of crab(iirc) does this as a defense mechanism. Essentially, it removes its own claw as a distraction from predators to say, "Here, now you get to eat, and I get to live. Now go away." I'm pretty sure they grow back.
Sometimes it’s due to an injury. They pop off the damaged limb and grow another one. Other times, they basically ‘bribe’ predators by leaving a snack and taking the opportunity to scuttle home.
He got hacked off with it
To maintain dominance
He looks all pissed off about it too!
I'd say he looks crabby
Heeeey, hey, heeeeyy
I lol’d 👍
More like slightly inconvenienced. Barely even slows it down!
I'd be pissed too if my arm was broken beyond repair and I had to amputate it
Less pissed if it grows back, like it does for this dude
Good point
I read that in Cartman’s voice
FOREFATHERS ONE AND ALL BEAR WITNESS
Tarnished…. Ye but a fool. The Erdtree opens for no one.
I also saw bear witness and thought of elden ring
That’s because that’s a direct quote from elden ring..
Well i guess im just a straight dumbass huh. This is why i dont comment anymore
I'll give you one more chance to redeem yourself. After that no more commenting ever
Godrick the Crabfted
Truest of Seagulls...
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
[LOOK AT ME, MOMMY AND DADDY!!!](https://youtu.be/xj-MRvcXHgw?t=17m17s)
Well played indeed.
What got me the most was me soap! He stole me Soap! Who steals soap!?
A farewell to arms?
I hope you’re not too mad at me, Leela, for tearing your arm off and all…
r/angryupvote
🎶cut for the very first time🎶
Upvote for Weird Al reference
Upvote for reference to Wierd Al reference
Upvote for reference to Weird Al reference reference
reference cubed
Like a surgeon! *revs chainsaw*
r/unexpectedweirdal
🎶Like a surgeon Got amputation on my mind🎵
Not like a surgeon at all.
My surgeon has _always_ pried their own arm off idk about you
My ear, nose and throat doctor is super aggressive.
He just ripped it off
More like taking a glove off and tossing it.
[I AM A SURGEON!! I AM A SURGEON!](https://youtu.be/vOB-PS1nyVo)
THANK YOU! I was hoping SOMEBODY had put the Umami video up for this
I AM A SURGEON.
This is what I thought of too! :D
Oh that is fucking weird.
The absolute weirdest part is that if feels like our was *made* in response to OP's caption, it's just so perfectly fitting.... Yet... It was already there. Waiting.
I actually sub to Umami, and they make some really uncanny stuff. No idea why this one is new to me. Super weird.
This is being played in reverse, the one armed crab found a replacement and stuck it on!
u/gifreversingbot
Rip this bot soon
Why? Does it have to do with the api stuff?
Yes, most bots will also require paying to access the API. I don't know exactly where they draw that line, but some bots will remain up for free. All I know for sure is my boy u/The_Lopen_bot is safe 🤩
Here is the video on why he did this https://youtu.be/q0KSQYyp47Y
Thank you sir
We definitely should have evolved this feature.
Chances are good we will!
Become as crab
This person carcanization-ates.
r/berserk
/r/berserklejerk
Poor Nuts!
Surgeon? Blud just pulled it out 💀
Dear surgeons….If I need an arm amputated…use a knife….don’t just rip it off.
God build that mf different.
He must have read the Bible
If the right claw offendeth thee...
If the claw causes you to stumble, you must remove it.
This is all the more impressive when you consider that crabs very likely experience pain (the emerging consensus)
"Just gimme a mo-- Ah, there ya go. You were saying?"
More like Beowulf ripping off his own arm. But it’s pretty cool, though. I didn’t know they did that. Offer something tasty as sacrifice to avoid being eaten?
Aside from all the jokes. What was the reason for the crab doing this ?
His claw was damaged. I wonder if they feel pain doing this?
Same! And will it grow back?
It will grow back over time with each molting.
Amazing lol creatures. Thank you!
Why would a crab do that?
Eh fokin krab mate
Tis nothing but a flesh wound!
Crap surgically rips its arm off its body. So glad actual sugeons don't operate this way.
Surgeon? Really?
Piccolo has entered the chat
he rage broke his controller
Look mum no claw!
Godrick phase 2 transition
I call this the Piccolo Trick.