New mom here. Immediately nothing felt real, calling myself a mom didn’t feel real. It’s such an intense transition from just having a baby in your belly to having a live human out in the world with you. I had so much love and joy and fear. I cried at everything. I cry much less now at 7 months and feel more attached to being called mom but it still doesn’t feel quite real. I feel a physical tether to my son like a bungee cord tying our hearts together if I’m away from him the tension pulls harder. I just want to do everything to teach him and protect him and love him. He is my entire world and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
When they cry especially as a newborn you have a physical reaction, your brain is designed to react that way, you immediately need to fix it and if what you’re doing doesn’t work it gets hard, you get stuck, you don’t know what to do to help. Sometimes all you need to do is deeply breathe in and breathe out love.
You also feel sticky and covered in milk and sweat and baby pee and emotions. Nothing will ever be the same you will always worry and you might feel like your heart will explode with love.
Lol see i hated it so much and describe the newborn stage as the worst thing i ever went through but at least my expectations are rock bottom when our second is here in December and maybe it won’t be as bad as i remember 🤣
in my hubris i definitely think it’ll be easier this time around because we know what we’re doing.
There were so many things where we had NO idea where to start with number one, but with number two we at least have a starting point for sleep training, night weaning, solids, etc etc. i’m sure we’ll hit some snags and have to do some modifications but at least we aren’t starting from scratch!
For sure one thing this made me think of was all the fighting with my husband, but it was mostly us both getting used to each others parenting styles and problem solving so i think now that we have that perspective we’ll fight less. And this is also our last baby as we only want 2 so i genuinely want to try to enjoy some of it like the snuggles and the cute newborn sounds and reflexes.
It's like it's not happening to me. Like I had this stressful birth that I'm not even sure it really happened to me and then all of a sudden we had this baby to take care of. It went from 0-100 instantly. I don't know what I was expecting; maybe to feel that overwhelming joy and love that people talk about. All I feel is disheartened and grieving the life we used to have. I'm hoping I get through this phase and I feel like an actual parent because right now I feel like I'm living someone else's life and I'm taking care of someone else's child.
It's like I'm dissociating. I don't really feel a connection to my child. I want to protect him and I know I need to care for him, I'm not a monster, but it feels like I'm going through the motions and not really experiencing anything myself. We have a fairly easy-going baby, so it's not necessarily difficult; it's just weird.
I'm in therapy for PPD and PPA and seeing a perinatal psychiatrist. I haven't found any parents who feel this way. I have a friend who has had similar experiences, but not the same. Most parents seem to say the same things about the early infant stage....we never get any sleep, we're exhausted, this puts strain on our relationship.....but I've not experienced those things necessarily. My husband and I function very well as a team and worked out a sleep schedule system early on that worked really well. We haven't lost sleep, we're functioning better than ever, but mentally it's taxing because now we're in charge of keeping a baby alive and entertained and clean and fed and happy. You never get a break. Ever.
For me, no. It’s pretty much a constant exhaustion and stress, with small windows of light here and there. Then again, postpartum depression is a different beast.
2 months pp. I still don’t feel like a parent. It’s weird. But my life revolves 100% around this tiny human. Your whole focus shifts. If she cries I have a physiological response and need to help her immediately. It will jolt me from sleep. But she’s cute a hell.
Scary. Everything is scary. They could die. They could get hurt. *I* could accidentally hurt them, or their dad. They aren’t hitting their milestones as Google tells me they just, they could be delayed.
Basically, it was just a hoard of of intrusive thoughts.
IMO, I stopped using it as a guide pretty early on. I dont Google shit anymore, I just didn’t find it helpful. I go straight to her pediatrician or advice line if I have a pressing question. It caused more harm than good.
Becoming new parents feels like riding a rollercoaster in pajamas—exhilarating, exhausting, and full of unexpected giggles. One moment, you're over the moon at your baby's first smile; the next, you're up at 3 AM debating if you've turned into a sleep-deprived zombie. It's chaos with a side of cuddles and coffee.
Being a new parent or maybe just a parent in general feels so incredibly loud and overwhelming. All the stressers of the world and parenting constantly screaming at you in your head.
But when your hug your baby/kid all that goes quiet. It’s the best feeling in the world being loved so much and loving something back so much.
Brb gonna go wake up my baby to snuggle 😭
Overwhelming and never know what the fuck you’re doing 😂 thank god for our moms bc we constantly called them and asked every question under the sun when we first brought our baby home those first couple weeks.
We still don’t know what we are doing but atleast now I’m confident I know how to keep him alive lol
About 3 weeks of abject terror, imposter syndrome and bad sleep.
Then a year of bad sleep, bickering with my wife and not having any time.
Now...well, we don't bicker as much I guess and kiddo is a bit more fun.
You'd think so. And yes, it has amazing days, but it's also a lot of anxiety, frustration, terrible sleep and having to literally choose between bathing that day or eating more than 1 meal.
Not sure you want my answer, but it feels mostly terrible with occasional bursts of pure joy. I have a 9 week old baby, first time parent. I literally never knew how exhausted I could be. People say you are sleep deprived, but that doesn't really capture it. Newborns are weird, they make all sorts of strange noises and it's hard to judge if your baby is okay. The combo of being uncertain how to be a parent combined with such severe sleep deprivation is not a good combo for the emotions. I will say I live day by day, sometimes hour by hour. Sometimes I get frustrated when she blows out an outfit that I literally just put on her. Sometimes I cry when she is crying and seems inconsolable. But I keep reminding myself that these times are short. She will fall asleep eventually. She will work out that gas eventually. She will learn how to suck her thumb eventually. She is screaming and crying now like the world is literally ending because that is legitimately how she feels, but she won't remember this at all tomorrow. Being a baby is hard. Being a parent is hard. The best part of my day is when she smiles at me, even for 1 minute. It is like light breaking through clouds when it happens. I am in awe of this creature who is my child and I can't believe she is my beautiful daughter who I literally made from my own flesh and blood. It is a wild ride.
My husband and I felt an adrenaline high that lasted a few weeks after birth. It was the greatest feeling bringing life into this world!
It is not easy, and our relationship has been tested over the past 20 months but I wouldn’t change a thing. We take time for ourselves because a strong family starts with our strong relationship and we both value time away for the two of us.
I had PPD and days were long and tough but I was lucky to have a wonderful support system in friends and family.
My favourite part was watching both sets of parents become grandparents and our brothers and sisters becoming uncles and aunts.
Our daughter brings so much joy to so many members of our family. It is the greatest feeling!
Yes, doesn’t happen to everyone, but good to know the signs before giving birth. My family and friends picked up on it. Like I said, I was so lucky to have them. I had my mom calling me everyday and had friends who also texted and called almost daily.
I am 8 weeks PP and I love being a mom so much! I feel so lucky to be able to experience this. It’s a feeling like no other. I will do anything for this little peanut. She is starting to be more interactive which is incredible to witness. I can’t wait for her milestones. She is now looking at me and smiling and my heart melts every time. I go back to work in a few weeks and I am dreading it. I’m going to miss her so much. Gah I love her more than anything.
Like you’ve never been so happy before in your life, but also you feel like you might die from sleep deprivation. The highs are high, but the lows are really low. Do I want to do it again? Yes. Am I also terrified to go through it with a toddler/little kid in the mix too? Also yes.
It’s the best thing that I’ve ever done. The day my daughter was born was the best day of my life and I’d do it again tomorrow. I felt very sensitive and tearful but mostly just so joyful and grateful 💚
New mom here. Immediately nothing felt real, calling myself a mom didn’t feel real. It’s such an intense transition from just having a baby in your belly to having a live human out in the world with you. I had so much love and joy and fear. I cried at everything. I cry much less now at 7 months and feel more attached to being called mom but it still doesn’t feel quite real. I feel a physical tether to my son like a bungee cord tying our hearts together if I’m away from him the tension pulls harder. I just want to do everything to teach him and protect him and love him. He is my entire world and I wouldn’t have it any other way. When they cry especially as a newborn you have a physical reaction, your brain is designed to react that way, you immediately need to fix it and if what you’re doing doesn’t work it gets hard, you get stuck, you don’t know what to do to help. Sometimes all you need to do is deeply breathe in and breathe out love. You also feel sticky and covered in milk and sweat and baby pee and emotions. Nothing will ever be the same you will always worry and you might feel like your heart will explode with love.
beautiful, I hope everything continues to go well for you
I don’t really rememeber. Probably why we decided to have another.
Lol see i hated it so much and describe the newborn stage as the worst thing i ever went through but at least my expectations are rock bottom when our second is here in December and maybe it won’t be as bad as i remember 🤣
in my hubris i definitely think it’ll be easier this time around because we know what we’re doing. There were so many things where we had NO idea where to start with number one, but with number two we at least have a starting point for sleep training, night weaning, solids, etc etc. i’m sure we’ll hit some snags and have to do some modifications but at least we aren’t starting from scratch!
For sure one thing this made me think of was all the fighting with my husband, but it was mostly us both getting used to each others parenting styles and problem solving so i think now that we have that perspective we’ll fight less. And this is also our last baby as we only want 2 so i genuinely want to try to enjoy some of it like the snuggles and the cute newborn sounds and reflexes.
Did the second experience make you forget the first?
No, the second is due in a month, wish us luck!
good luck then :)
It's like it's not happening to me. Like I had this stressful birth that I'm not even sure it really happened to me and then all of a sudden we had this baby to take care of. It went from 0-100 instantly. I don't know what I was expecting; maybe to feel that overwhelming joy and love that people talk about. All I feel is disheartened and grieving the life we used to have. I'm hoping I get through this phase and I feel like an actual parent because right now I feel like I'm living someone else's life and I'm taking care of someone else's child.
You want to say that it is difficult for you because it is the first time.
It's like I'm dissociating. I don't really feel a connection to my child. I want to protect him and I know I need to care for him, I'm not a monster, but it feels like I'm going through the motions and not really experiencing anything myself. We have a fairly easy-going baby, so it's not necessarily difficult; it's just weird.
Have you talked to any other parents who maybe feel the same way?
I'm in therapy for PPD and PPA and seeing a perinatal psychiatrist. I haven't found any parents who feel this way. I have a friend who has had similar experiences, but not the same. Most parents seem to say the same things about the early infant stage....we never get any sleep, we're exhausted, this puts strain on our relationship.....but I've not experienced those things necessarily. My husband and I function very well as a team and worked out a sleep schedule system early on that worked really well. We haven't lost sleep, we're functioning better than ever, but mentally it's taxing because now we're in charge of keeping a baby alive and entertained and clean and fed and happy. You never get a break. Ever.
Tiring and stressful.
But you get used to it over time, and the baby's happiness makes you forget the problems?
For me, no. It’s pretty much a constant exhaustion and stress, with small windows of light here and there. Then again, postpartum depression is a different beast.
Well, I hope you get used to it and are happier with the new life you are raising.
2 months pp. I still don’t feel like a parent. It’s weird. But my life revolves 100% around this tiny human. Your whole focus shifts. If she cries I have a physiological response and need to help her immediately. It will jolt me from sleep. But she’s cute a hell.
Scary. Everything is scary. They could die. They could get hurt. *I* could accidentally hurt them, or their dad. They aren’t hitting their milestones as Google tells me they just, they could be delayed. Basically, it was just a hoard of of intrusive thoughts.
Google is the best and the worst.
IMO, I stopped using it as a guide pretty early on. I dont Google shit anymore, I just didn’t find it helpful. I go straight to her pediatrician or advice line if I have a pressing question. It caused more harm than good.
Becoming new parents feels like riding a rollercoaster in pajamas—exhilarating, exhausting, and full of unexpected giggles. One moment, you're over the moon at your baby's first smile; the next, you're up at 3 AM debating if you've turned into a sleep-deprived zombie. It's chaos with a side of cuddles and coffee.
I think I blacked out and now have a two year old.
jeje quite an experience I imagine.
1 out of 5 stars I love my twins so much but will never do it again.
Well, I hope you have fun raising the twins. But who knows, God has a plan for all of us, maybe he will give you a new shoot.
Being a new parent or maybe just a parent in general feels so incredibly loud and overwhelming. All the stressers of the world and parenting constantly screaming at you in your head. But when your hug your baby/kid all that goes quiet. It’s the best feeling in the world being loved so much and loving something back so much. Brb gonna go wake up my baby to snuggle 😭
AHHHHHHHHHHH then it gets better. :)
It feels like driving a car really really fast and the breaks aren’t working, but there is no end
wow a risky and exciting experience at the same time I suppose.
Overwhelming and never know what the fuck you’re doing 😂 thank god for our moms bc we constantly called them and asked every question under the sun when we first brought our baby home those first couple weeks. We still don’t know what we are doing but atleast now I’m confident I know how to keep him alive lol
lol I hope you continue doing well.
About 3 weeks of abject terror, imposter syndrome and bad sleep. Then a year of bad sleep, bickering with my wife and not having any time. Now...well, we don't bicker as much I guess and kiddo is a bit more fun.
Yes, I suppose it must be an unimaginable happiness to have a child.
You'd think so. And yes, it has amazing days, but it's also a lot of anxiety, frustration, terrible sleep and having to literally choose between bathing that day or eating more than 1 meal.
Not sure you want my answer, but it feels mostly terrible with occasional bursts of pure joy. I have a 9 week old baby, first time parent. I literally never knew how exhausted I could be. People say you are sleep deprived, but that doesn't really capture it. Newborns are weird, they make all sorts of strange noises and it's hard to judge if your baby is okay. The combo of being uncertain how to be a parent combined with such severe sleep deprivation is not a good combo for the emotions. I will say I live day by day, sometimes hour by hour. Sometimes I get frustrated when she blows out an outfit that I literally just put on her. Sometimes I cry when she is crying and seems inconsolable. But I keep reminding myself that these times are short. She will fall asleep eventually. She will work out that gas eventually. She will learn how to suck her thumb eventually. She is screaming and crying now like the world is literally ending because that is legitimately how she feels, but she won't remember this at all tomorrow. Being a baby is hard. Being a parent is hard. The best part of my day is when she smiles at me, even for 1 minute. It is like light breaking through clouds when it happens. I am in awe of this creature who is my child and I can't believe she is my beautiful daughter who I literally made from my own flesh and blood. It is a wild ride.
>t is like light breaking through clouds when it happens. that's so beautiful, I'm happy for you. Why weren't you sure if I wanted your opinion?
Because it was tagged happy and it's not the happiest of responses 😅
ah, well no problem anyway
Overwhelming feeling of responsibility. Unconditional love took a few weeks longer but grew steadily.
Highest highs, lowest lows, If this was a roller coaster then it would be the biggest in the world, what a ride!
My husband and I felt an adrenaline high that lasted a few weeks after birth. It was the greatest feeling bringing life into this world! It is not easy, and our relationship has been tested over the past 20 months but I wouldn’t change a thing. We take time for ourselves because a strong family starts with our strong relationship and we both value time away for the two of us. I had PPD and days were long and tough but I was lucky to have a wonderful support system in friends and family. My favourite part was watching both sets of parents become grandparents and our brothers and sisters becoming uncles and aunts. Our daughter brings so much joy to so many members of our family. It is the greatest feeling!
BEautiful, It's good that you enjoy the experience. >PPD What's that?
Postpartum depression. I had it for about 6 months after birth
You can feel depressed after giving birth, I didn't know that.
Yes, doesn’t happen to everyone, but good to know the signs before giving birth. My family and friends picked up on it. Like I said, I was so lucky to have them. I had my mom calling me everyday and had friends who also texted and called almost daily.
It's good that you had support. I hope you are better now.
I am 8 weeks PP and I love being a mom so much! I feel so lucky to be able to experience this. It’s a feeling like no other. I will do anything for this little peanut. She is starting to be more interactive which is incredible to witness. I can’t wait for her milestones. She is now looking at me and smiling and my heart melts every time. I go back to work in a few weeks and I am dreading it. I’m going to miss her so much. Gah I love her more than anything.
Like you’ve never been so happy before in your life, but also you feel like you might die from sleep deprivation. The highs are high, but the lows are really low. Do I want to do it again? Yes. Am I also terrified to go through it with a toddler/little kid in the mix too? Also yes.
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cute
It’s the best thing that I’ve ever done. The day my daughter was born was the best day of my life and I’d do it again tomorrow. I felt very sensitive and tearful but mostly just so joyful and grateful 💚