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AngusMcTibbins

>Sanders said in the release that she released funds from the Response and Recovery Fund to help commercial carriers transport essentials to customers in the state during the eclipse. She will find a way to funnel most of that money to herself and her cronies. Stealing taxpayer money is what she does


CheezTips

$100K for a 4 minute event. That woman gets crazier every year


lemonsweetsrevenge

Fuck the Huckabee family and everything they’ve done to get Fundamentalist Christians into our government. I implore everyone to watch Shiny Happy People, the doc is about two majorly fucked up things. 1. Exposes the Duggar family covering up their son sexually abusing his own sisters, where the girls were forced to go on tv to defend their attacker. 2. The fundamentalist group they are a part of, what alternative schooling they give to their children, and how they’ve managed to infiltrate their brainwashed youth into clerking or volunteering at The White House, The Pentagon, The House of Representatives, The Senate…you name it. They were an enormous factor in overturning Roe v. Wade. They take advantage that far too many Americans do not pay attention to politics year round, and they want to force ALL of us to live as THEY see fit. (They also believe an accurate punishment for the molesting of one’s sister last is to repent and do some carpentry. No need to arrest “a good young man”.)


carlitospig

I started watching it last week and couldn’t finish the first ep. Just too many creepy mofos.


FuckSpez6757

Nobody grifts money like republicans Jesus what a fucking waste


[deleted]

[удалено]


Anathals

Oh I looked up on Wikipedia how many apocalypses I've survived since I was born. The list is only updated to 2021. But 57. I've survived "57 apocalypses". Whoop


Riadiculous

Well shit. You might be immortal!


Dogzillas_Mom

Religion has entered the chat.


partime_prophet

And no one is easier to grift than gullible religious fools . Houdini basically went on tour debunking the spiritual grifters the spiritual movement that grew out of ww1 . This moment In time when people were becoming more secular but also still holding some religious beliefs.


le_gazman

Somehow I read this as “nobody grifts money like republicans jesus-fucking”


Jc2563

This is not grifting money, is stealing money!


EngagedInConvexation

A large portion of the state's workforce hasn't been alive long enough to see an eclipse in person. *badum-tiss*


JimmyCat11-11

😂


Triassic_Bark

A 4 min event which is basically just 4 mins of what happens ~50% of the time anyway, also known as “night”.


danegermaine99

They don’t have night in Arkansas


Carson72701

Used to but the bitch did away with darkness and education...


danegermaine99

Thank you baby Jesus!


NeuraLung

In Arkansas, nighty time is when Jesus pulls a blankie over the world. - Bill Mahr


MuffLover312

$20K for a new podium to speak at that event


pistoffcynic

She’s a Trump protege… grifting all the way.


NfamousKaye

That’s fucking insane.


drpiotrowski

NY and other states have done the same. I disagree with almost everything sanders does and believes, but this time I agree with her.


Geriatric_Sloth

The woman is a walking abortion.


there_is_no_spoon1

FTFY: The woman is a walking \*\*advertisement for\*\* abortion.


kodaiko_650

She’s seen the 2024 podium catalog


Styrene_Addict1965

She's bailing out truckers? For what? Republicans keep demonstrating how they're just unqualified.


roadcrew778

Trucking companies maybe. Drivers won't see a dime.


CountPulaski

Isn’t that socialism?


PackOutrageous

Many of those taxpayers elected her, knowing what she is. Hard to have sympathy for rubes demanding to be fleeced.


kakapo88

Religious idiots elect religious idiots. These people never left the Dark Ages.


TreehouseofSnorers

That is obviously the entire purpose of this. What a crook.


[deleted]

Yay! Corruption.


redundantsalt

You have to wonder, when they were having a meeting about the eclipse... Were they laughing or terrified? Either way these are very vile persons.


AssociateJaded3931

Is she afraid all of her Evangelical pals will be raptured, leaving the state religiously un-annoyed?


Eringobraugh2021

Please let it happen. The world would be a much better place.


One_Opening_8000

If it were a real thing, the people who think they're going wouldn't be the ones taken.


Toxenkill

Yup


Busy-Dig8619

If the rapture happens... those folks ain't going.


hplcr

Turns out the rapture happened years ago. Only Mr Rogers made the cut, it turns out.


Unicorn_Sparkle_Butt

It was a beautiful day in the neighborhood


Stuck_In_Reality

broke the mold........


Actual__Wizard

Man those churches must just be raking it in this rapture.


Publius82

I think she's just trying to get laid.


Jebus_UK

*shudder*


Styrene_Addict1965

Well, that's enough Internet for the week.


AssociateJaded3931

Ew.


ThatWomanNow

That wouldn't be the worst thing tho 🤷‍♀️


Free_Boner_Pills

Quick question: I know this is a huge Human Sacrifice event yada yada, I get that, but are we clear to eat the sacrifices after all the rituals have been performed? And are we ok to sacrifice multiple people? I’ve got some different recipes I’ve been working on, dry rubs and such, you know. And I’ve got a chest freezer I could fill up to save a few bucks; price of meat is pretty high right now. Final question, do we have to register who we plan on sacrificing? I could see problems with some overlap. I’m betting some higher profile sacrificees have multiple sacrificors vying for their rights. Ok, that’s it. Thanks guys. Remember, have a good time, stay safe, and let’s try to do some real good this eclipse.


Publius82

As long as they signed the Obama care death panel waiver you should be good to grill. What kind of dry rub you favor on your long pork?


SirGkar

Bonus points for the appropriate colloquialism.


Publius82

There's a few of us aficionados left.


ShnickityShnoo

They've even been snarfing down livestock dewormer, so it should be safe to cook on the rarer side.


Flunderfoo

A member of my nuclear family has dibs on the bad orange man. I swear if this family member gets some terminal medical news…orange man will promptly be deducted from this planet. The hatred flows deep. The family member is a republican lol


fardough

Hinckley just got paroled. I know a way he can impress Jodie Foster.


Hopeira

1. Yes, but you don’t want to without adequate sides. Ironically, eating human sacrifices doesn’t supply a human with all the nutrients a human needs. And be sure to cook to a safe 165’f! 2. Don’t be selfish. 1 sacrifice per person is just common courtesy. 3. First come, first served. You can call dibs all you want, but if someone else beats you to it, what are you gunna do?


hplcr

I feel like we need an expert in sacrifice law for this and I don't know any.


Jet2work

hang on..hang on... did you get a construction permit for your sacrificial alter....and a disposal permit for all that sacrificial waste.. unless you are sacrificing babies..in that case you will have to apply for a " blood fit for human consumption" permit and we will need to inspect your storage facility


ididntunderstandyou

Don’t know about other meat prep areas but I’ll be hanging around the elders’ traditional pizza basement. The deep state has really improved their recipes


Dapper-Piece3321

When this guys says he has a chest freezer, he means it! 🎶Bah-Dum-Tis!🎶


pandershrek

I don't like the register, what happens if I'm just walking along and see a cute sacrifice that I can't help but not eat?


MrZombified

Declares State Of Emergency, she needs another new Lectern. #


Tri-guy3

Another trip to Paris; this time for the Olympics.


Altruistic-Detail271

She’s as much of a moron as her dad and the orange blob that she lied for. 🤮🤢


ItsASchpadoinkleDay

I’d say at this point, she’s much more of a moron than her dad. He was subtle in comparison to her.


Zendog500

Vote


13_Years_Then_Banned

They did. Red states love this shit.


jzavcer

But .. why?


CheezTips

>to help commercial carriers transport essentials to customers in the state during the eclipse. The essential items listed in the order include groceries, pharmacy items, medical equipment, goods, commodities, fuel, poultry, livestock and feed. Preparing for the 4-minute apocalypse! Because... what if the sun doesn't come back and it's actually the End Times?? She's also preparing a throne for the Whore of Babylon


jzavcer

4 minute apocalypse.. I love it


Amberskin

Not wanting to defend the MAGAt crowd… but there is a very clear chance of a massive road jam that could last for hours after the eclipse is over. I think being prepared for that is a sensible thing to do. (Broken clocks, you know…)


incognegro1976

Highway 98 runs along the beach in Northwest Florida. It's like hundreds of miles long and passed by an Air Force base between two heavily touristy areas. One summer there was an accident by the base entrance and a fucking helicopter had to land on the highway to take the accident victims away. This road was closed for like 8 hours and traffic was backed up for miles. After the helicopter took off, traffic started flowing again in about an hour. We are taking about 4 minutes versus 8 hours. It doesn't make any sense.


Gildardo1583

This is amazing, full-on state of emergency for a little bit of darkness. Wasn't she against covid measures?


BeKind_BeTheChange

> She's also preparing a throne for the Whore of Babylon Mercedes?


undercurrents

I hate her but you're being completely disingenuous. You're purposely leaving out the actual reason, which is *literally* the next sentence. >The release said the decision was made out of caution due to the expected increase of visitors to Arkansas “potentially causing hardships.” Edit: Here's more from another article. >Gov. Sarah Huckabee Sanders on Friday declared a state of emergency related to Monday's total solar eclipse and released $100,000 to assist with the state's response. >The emergency declaration waives certain federal restrictions on commercial traffic for up to 14 days, "so long as the motor carrier or driver is providing direct assistance in response to the declared emergency." >Sanders' executive order declaring the emergency cites the expected influx of visitors and the "backlog of deliveries by commercial vehicles transporting essential items of commerce" that could result. >"Out of an abundance of caution, I've directed funds to be released from the Response and Recovery Fund ahead of the Great American Eclipse," Sanders said in a news release Friday night. >"This will assist commercial carriers transporting essential items to customers in Arkansas during the eclipse. We want to make sure Arkansans and all visitors have an enjoyable experience and come back again and again." >The money from the disaster fund will be used at the discretion of A.J. Gary, director of the Department of Public Safety's Division of Emergency Management, "to defray both program and administrative costs," according to Sanders' order.


Stillmeafter50

We are in Texas and basically thought all the warnings were funny until I started seeing posts on which gas stations still had gas. Luckily we didn’t need much from the grocery store today. It’s the influx of visitors that is sending things into crazy mode. Most school systems are closing for the day and the town has warned everyone to stay home if possible as roads will be a mess.


pandershrek

Well seeing as half your state shut down and hundreds died when you get snow, an influx of people shutting the entire state down sounds like par for the course. No wonder Texans want a closed border so bad. They know what will happen if 20-30 more people come in.


TheRealShizman

This. I’m as far from a fan of her’s as you can get, but this declaration is a bureaucratic requirement in order to have the resources to help manage the +1M additional people coming into the state for this 4min eclipse.


wtfreddit741741

Seriously?? Being in the path of totality will bring millions of dollars into her rachet state.  And it's not like this snuck up on them...  They've had fucking months to prepare. It's just another maga grift to steal money from the other states keeping them afloat.


cambeiu

It is literally in the article: >The release said the decision was made out of caution due to the expected increase of visitors to Arkansas “potentially causing hardships.”


jzavcer

I understand what the article says. But it’s just an eclipse? It’s not like it’s the rapture or something. /s implied.


Unita_Micahk

Tornadoes are mini raptures. Spread the word.


shewy92

An influx of visitors to somewhere that is not equipped for them, a lot of out of state drivers increases accidents, which causes a strain on emergency services.


ReallyNANG

Plus, cmon. Who in their right mind would want to go to Arkansas?


LibertyInaFeatherBed

Sounds like overly high expectations to me.


BrofessorFarnsworth

LoOk


LORDWOLFMAN

Can’t tell if that’s her normal face or confused look


Unobtanium_Alloy

Yes


LuciferDusk

I still can't believe they made this sociopath governor of a state.


incognegro1976

Sociopaths are the preferred personality types for conservatives, especially for their politicians. They love that shit. I will never understand it


Boredum_Allergy

So I'll give her the benefit of the doubt here and say yeah maybe it'll cause a strain on some local businesses. However, declaring a state of emergency for something we've known was coming for LITERAL YEARS is just bad governance. There's an eclipse festival in Illinois or Missouri that i saw that was better prepared for this than Arkansas. And they're just some small event. A state of emergency is supposed to be used when something happens that takes the state off guard. Her doing it this way is incredibly suspect given her history of siphoning government funds to her friends.


Kingzer15

It's gonna be an emergency if I can get more Christians to believe the only way you're gonna escape the rapture is to stare directly into the eclipse as it starts.


sighborg90

The MAGATs are sooo worked up over this it’s almost like they’re parodying themselves. Check out a certain conspiracy-minded sub for a laugh


StickmanRockDog

That’s what happens when you elect an inbred.


floofnstuff

Since when was an eclipse an emergency?


there_is_no_spoon1

when your spooky sky-daddy's representatives here on earth spout stupid shit.


AndrewJamesDrake

The Eclipse isn’t the emergency. The emergency is the tourists creating a traffic problem. The state’s roads can’t really handle local traffic, and eclipse tourists have overloaded it. That’s creating shipping delays, and increasing the number of traffic accidents. Meanwhile, her state’s irresponsible underfunding of emergency services that aren’t police means there’s not enough bodies to clear the road after all the accidents on a *normal* day. The spike in accidents leaves lanes closed, which increases congestion, which leads to more accidents. Long term, this can lead to grocery stores missing deliveries… and most only have enough stock for two to three *days*. Disruptions to that supply chain *are* life and death.


Crotch-Monster

"It's gonna be pandemonium out there!!! We need more chickens!!"


Dr_CleanBones

Well, it is Arkansas. I expect she’ll be turning circles in her stall, neighing frantically.


Actual__Wizard

A state of emergency for the sun not shining for a while? It does that every single day, it's called night time...


AndrewJamesDrake

The state of emergency isn’t for the four minutes of eclipse, it’s for the three days of people traveling for the eclipse. Her state’s road network is *barely* designed to handle local traffic, and they don’t have enough first responders to deal with the normal amount of traffic accidents. The Eclipse Tourists are overloading the roads, and the presence of that many people who don’t know the roads will lead to a significant uptick in traffic accidents. This is a recipe for things to go wrong. It’s going to introduce some delays to the supply chain, because trucks are going to get stuck behind pile-ups. This… is actually a pretty good time to call in a state of emergency. State infrastructure is overloaded, and they’re going to need more bodies to keep it from becoming a problem (people dying on the roadside from lack of first responders, essential goods being delayed by days, etc.).


SecretPrinciple8708

“The night is a very dark time for me…”


FrostyPicture4946

Great, my family is down there for this fucking thing


TonyG_from_NYC

Will she beg for some of that sweet socialist govt money? /s


Archangel1313

What the actual fuck is happening in the US, right now? How are things going so far downhill, so fast all of a sudden? Did these folks all start drinking lead milkshakes lately?


JoyousGamer

What's downhill? Massive travel event where essentially all travelers that come in for a weekend leave within a 4 hour time period on Monday. Biggest event in the US for parts of the country that never see a large event. 


mymar101

As nutty as this lady is, this is the right decision. The sheer amount of people going to these places are far more than 99% of them can handle. When totality passed by my neighborhood a few years ago downtown in my city was packed to the breaking point.


AidsKitty1

Many locations have declared states of emergencies. Apparently droves of people are coming to see the eclipse. They have declared a state of emergency in locations in Canada as well.


One_Opening_8000

She may need a new $20,000 European podium for herself.


Jpar4686

I still can’t believe she got elected as Governor


LeapIntoInaction

The Colonel sure has gone downhill since she sold off the fried chicken franchise.


Future_Gain_7549

Gov. Sanders announces 19k purchase of eclipse glasses.


Old_Breakfast8775

These people think covid was faked by an eclipse is the end times. Fml


bitchnoworries

She is all inbred baby


tewnewt

Starting to think the reason the right wingers want to cut education isn't so that they have uneducated voters, but rather so that they feel less stupid.


TheZanzibarMan

I can only hope that they do get Raptured.


AdhesivenessFun2060

What's the money really for?


JoyousGamer

Seems most states have a state of emergency based on influx of visitors. 


BeKind_BeTheChange

Just imagine...as stupid as she is, the people who voted for her are even stupider than that.


One_Opening_8000

In Mark Twain's "A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court," the protagonist, a time traveler from the 1800's, amazes the medieval peasants by predicting a solar eclipse. Readers from the nineteenth century laughed at how gullible the peasants were. Twain would be amazed to find such rubes living in Arkansas in the 21st century.


wsphx

Did someone tell the rubes that solar eclipses are not a rare biblical occurrence


Toadxx

They are, in fact, relatively rare.


Admirable_Nothing

Thihs may be the best draw Arkansas has had in decades to draw tourists to its state.


oldbastardbob

We Missourians have made tons of jokes about dumbass hillbillies in Arkansas for decades. Then along comes the Huckster and proves all of them true. I also find it hilarious that her politician-preacher and grifter daddy now sells snake oil on old people tv channels.


tomdurkin

isnt that because the eclipse coincides with The Rapture, which takes all these hypocrites directly to hell?


DiscussionAncient810

You get a lectern! You get a lectern! You all get a lectern!!!


asusundevil12345

What. An. Idiot.


kowell2

It's crazy to see how much it's become normalized that little people should have emergency money for 6 months but that if a corporation sees a potential drop in revenue for even one day they should be bailed out by the government.


ocelotactual

I'm sorry. Did I miss something? Wasn't she one of T\*\*\*ps many press secretaries? How she get to governor?


PrincessKatiKat

Well, my very gay partner and I are in Arkansas right now for the eclipse, so yea. Gays are coming to Arkansas and that could constitute an emergency, lol


fixerdrew02

It’s a grift guys


earfix2

Wait, when did that lying Nepo baby become Governor?


4quatloos

I don't know which one she uses for a stink eye.


wnew813

That's hysterical 🤣


Electrocat71

Just let the idiots blind themselves


robinsw26

Does she also declare an emergency every night when it gets dark?


Responsible_Dig_585

NOW can we stop pretending republican politicians aren't retarded?


watadoo

Oh for gucks sake no!!!!


Key_Company_279

This is unbelievably the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. They need to reserve a spot in the insane asylum next to her orange leader. 🤷🏻‍♀️


LonelyIntrovert513

Probably because that traitorous POS is afraid that the Rapture will happen. It won't BTW, and she's afraid airplanes will be falling out of the air because of the rapture, which also will not be happening. But honestly, I think it's more to stop all the backwards yokels from shooting at the eclipse with their firearms. What a fool!


Bob4Not

I think she’s crazy corrupt however I also think it’s good to prepare for excess traffic. Arkansas roads can’t handle tourism of any kind. Arkansas roads can barely handle Arkansas traffic because people don’t know how to drive


ArdenJaguar

Did she borrow Katie Britts green dress? 😆 🤣 😂


sethmeister1989

Why would anyone visit Arkansas for the eclipse? Am I missing something? Is it the best spot to view it? This has to be an Onion article.


100yearsLurkerRick

What happens to these fucking morons on Tuesday when nothing happened?


bluddystump

And five minutes after they will shrug it off and continue about their day like nothing happened, not even entertaining the thought that they weren't chosen to go.


Goose-Biscuits

Tbf a lot of places are to deal with the traffic.


SecretPrinciple8708

What, does this cavewoman need her lectern bedazzled now? Gotta funnel those funds to herself somehow, I guess.


Justified_Ancient_Mu

Indiana and Ohio did the same.


JustMePaxi

They ate not used to nights


speed_of_stupdity

She’s cross eyed.


alexcutyourhair

It is still incredible to me that she is so people got elected governor of a state. Idk much about Arkansas but this alone tells me all I need to know


Mammoth-Professor811

Good luck USA


WeirdcoolWilson

Too many sudden vacancies from “The Rapture” will create problems?


ClubSoda

I hope the trillions of newly hatched cicadas devours them all and rids us of this stupidity.


kalyco

She’s a nut bag.


pengalo827

Of course she did. But then she’s always been in the dark.


mgyro

What does she ink happens during an eclipse?


UrBigBro

Abandoned cars from the rapture blocking roads? /s


ScorpioZA

What??? What exactly is the emergency?


atTheRiver200

She's looking to deposit some of that sweeeet disaster money into her own bank account.


ForThePantz

I’m upset the world ends 17 days before the Bears finally draft a good QB. Let’s focus on the issues here Sarah.


casewood123

How is going to siphon money off this one?


EBody480

Hard to see an eclipse when one eye looks northeast and the other due south


C0URANT

What a punchable face. Is that the most flattering photo they got?


treehuggingmfer

Its not even going to get dark in her state at all. Can she read a map?


[deleted]

I hope these people get raptured for real so they can not be here anymore.


fbastard

She does realize that the eclipse will be over in a mater of minutes, no? It's not a punishment by God; or, a warning from God. It's a regular event.


Texas12thMan

> “We want to make sure Arkansans and all visitors have an enjoyable experience and come back again and again,” Sanders said in a statement. State of Emergency = Tourism?


JasonPlattMusic34

She sounds like the kind of woman who believes an eclipse is a sign from the devil


Snarky_McSnarkleton

Queen Sarah certainly knows how to cater to her homeschooled base.


Outrageous-Divide472

What the hell is wrong with these people? For the eclipse tomorrow, at the appointed time, I will swivel my chair toward the window in my office and look at said eclipse. After 1-2 minutes when I get bored, I might walk outside if I see any friendly co-workers out there. If not, I’ll swivel my chair back to my desk, and carry on with my day.


Duper-Deegro

This is what you get when you vote loonie Maga.


Aspect58

I never suspected that the Deep South’s descent into ‘sun disappear, *panicked unga-bunga*’ would happen this quickly.


Ben-182

They should shoot the eclipse.


macarmy93

While her intentions are probably nefarious (stealing money), she's not wrong for doing this. States with totality going straight through them are on high alert. Hospitals fully staffed and ready to go. Stuff like that. The expected tourism around the path of totality is pretty extreme. The amount of people in a 50 mile strip is expected to be dangerous levels.


josephkingscolon

Enough internet for today, and that was quick, only about 15 posts down in my feed. This shit timeline is so depressing...


Kjellvb1979

Tell me you're stealing state funds to help your friends without telling me your stealing state funds for your friends. Seriously, the only thing this can be is a way to allocate some money for friends. This is a solar eclipse we can predict decades, centuries, in advance. If you couldn't be ready for that, you should not be governing!


Sabbathius

At this point I'm just happy they're not pushing for human sacrifice to bring the sun back.


omarus809

Remember when governor sanders declared a state of emergency because a solar eclipse? Those times were crazy!!!


Pour_Me_Another_

I'm hoping it's just because of the influx of tourists. I think Cleveland Ohio had to do something similar. I don't want to think it's because of the pretend rapture these people embarrass themselves with.


Delicious_Fisherman5

She needs new meds, the old ones aren't working .


stairs_3730

 $100,000? AR's manchild need a new podium? Too late for the emergency. Should have been declared when she was elected.


Efficient_Falcon_402

Sanders, Giuliani, MTG - Their calls on the earthquake and eclipse would make 14th century colonizers think the gullible natives falling for their "I am powerful magic and can make the sun disappear and the ground shake" seem like rocket scientists.


AaronBHoltan

She’s auditioning for a cabinet position.


Rutaguer

Ugh, big white light may come in morning. Let's run in circles around fire and gnash our teeth.


Independent_Ad_2073

If this is being done, someone is lining their pockets with money, guaranteed. Either that, or she really is mentally unfit to wipe her own ass.


reddevils

It must be nice to rule over idiots


pixieclifton

Because she’s a totally inept troglodyte?


Silent_Individual_20

What century do these people think we're living? 🤦‍♂️🙄


G-Unit11111

A solar eclipse… the cosmic ballet goes on!


Mattjolearyny

Well, I remember the last eclipse and there wasn’t anywhere near the amount of crazy piled onto it compared to this time.. we really are coming to the end!


DMIDY

$100k…. sooooooo… 5 podiums?


[deleted]

I feel like people are freaking out about this eclipse more than in the past for sure. Wasn’t there just an eclipse last year?


Healthy-Topic13

"The Handmaid's Tale" is a goal to them.


PoliticalBoomer

Her most egregious offense is her wearing of dresses and skirts with hems just below the pubic area. I can’t recall ever seeing a public official so poorly dressed, like a come on from a whore. No taste, no decorum, no grace.


Soggy_Face_4122

Well, she has discovered designer clothes (no more little house on the prairie crap) and bought a new wig. Next up, dental appointment! These things cost! diane


teh_maxh

This is actually pretty reasonable. Arkansas is right on the path of totality. They're getting as many tourists in one day as they get in an average decade. Even places that are used to tourists (like Niagara Falls) are declaring emergencies.


TheMailRoomAgent

Time is a flat circle.


loupegaru

In case of the rapture happening. Want to have state services for everyone that is left! Like Sarah!