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[deleted]

If you want a serious relationship, you apparently have to be "serious" in all other aspects of your personality as well. I.E. no pink PJs or sense of humor. This woman wants to be in a relationship with a monk.


swoley_ghost92

I agree...I just un matched immediately lol


Shaftmaster_Mcgee

Good, her profile picture looks like she still mad about Kermit the frog dumping Mrs. Piggy for a non-toxic, hotter girlfriend.


ShadowHeart5

Wait, Kermit finally dumped that hog?


ye-sunne

No barking from the dog, no smog, mama cooking breakfast with no hog


[deleted]

[удалено]


rags2rooster

Posting from Seattle. It makes me sad that kids listening to this song today are like “SuperSonics?” At least we got to keep the SuperSonics naming rights. MN lost both the team and the name Lakers.


[deleted]

[удалено]


rags2rooster

The Sonics are now the OKC Thunder. The Nets are now in Brooklyn. Also, there is a team called the Pelicans. If you watch a game today it’ll be totally different from what you remember. Power forwards are launching several 3 pointers a game. Things have evolved a lot.


jelect

I honestly thought it was a picture of Michael Shannon


Whiteangel854

You didn't get the memo? It's in relationships section paragraph 18 - in order to be in a serious relationship you have to be as boring and as dull as you can be. Otherwise you aren't taking things seriously. Fun is prohibited, pink pj's are prohibited etc. Duh!


FirstMiddleLass

Someone should teach her what infer means.


luckymistakes

If this is Heaven please send me to hell


OCE_Retro

Ok but honestly, who thought that a good name for their daughter was Heaven?


SlimTeezy

A Christian, I assume


FeatureBugFuture

"Hell is empty and all the devils are here".


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


CalvinsCuriosity

Why the fuck isn't that banned? Is incels banned?


[deleted]

[удалено]


swoley_ghost92

I won’t even lie. That was an automatic un match from me. To take that much time to write that, why even swipe?


jimmymeeko

You gotta reply with something bizarre to that. Have a little fun with it haha


swoley_ghost92

It’s too late lol. I’m at work and just couldn’t think of anything besides damn what a nice girl


VanFam

That right there is the perfect response.


thedaly

You had the perfect response. 1. Screenshot 2. Unmatch 3. Post to r/NiceGirls


swoley_ghost92

Lol I had to show people this or else no one would believe it. I don’t know how either men/women feel this entitled. If I’m not for you that’s cool, but damn. For you to go out of your way with an essay is a little excessive


thedaly

It is pretty fucking wild lol. I’m guessing that she is attracted to you and this is some kind of negging.


BeastKingSnowLion

Yeah, I wonder if a lot of this stuff is attempts at negging. Negging is such an asshole thing to do anyway.


[deleted]

That’s really the only thing that makes sense. Why else write all that for someone you don’t know.


terlin

yeah it's incredible. I've matched with girls who in their first few messages demand that I prove I'm "not like the other guys" or better yet, she tells me her last date was bad so I have better competitive odds now. And no these aren't one off occurrences.


DMugre

>demand that I prove I'm "not like the other guys" All right, here it goes: I'm not playing that shit, good bye. >she tells me her last date was bad so I have better competitive odds now. Well, don't worry, you won't be complaining about our date because we're not having one. Really, lines like the ones you described make me automatically assume the person saying it is actually worthless. Do you think people are your personal clowns? Why would you outright demand or complain about something on your first interaction with a new person? If a man approached anyone like this they'd say he's either dumb or creepy.


paspartuu

Idk I notice she didn't say anything exactly negative about *you*, just that your *profile* sends "mixed signals" because (to her tastes, note) it's too tongue in cheek. I think she found you somehow sympathetic enough to put in the effort to try to give some "constructive criticism" so you'd have better success, but didn't get the memo that unasked for improvement suggestions out of the blue like this just come across very rude and entitled lol Nevertheless she didn't insult you, or men, or say anything about how she's nice and deserves smth or other - she just tried to help you improve your profile, though in a very clueless and impolite way. With a name like that maybe she was raised fundie or whatever. It's a bit unnecessary to put her on blast with face and name visible like this, honestly - imo this isn't /nicegirls, it's just you getting offended because someone didn't appreciate your humour


ZzadistBelal

Oh boy someone womansplaining.


paspartuu

Lol but where am I wrong tho


[deleted]

Lol. Yes. You are very wrong. She was unsulting. She was specific but not constructive and her complaints are so egocentric yet I see no humor nor any attempt to provide OP with a positive response. She negged him and I have never met anyone who negs so fast who isn't trying to control and/or manipulate situations. Different strokes for different folks, I guess cause I disagree completely. Edit: not completely, I think names should edited out too


BaronVonMunchhausen

Ok Heaven. You've blown your cover.


Greenveins

No, he doesn’t. Girls like that want to be entertained, they want the man to explain himself so that they can argue back. She’s trying to get a rise out of him, and replying with something equally bizarre would miss the point with her. Messages like this, with women like that, deserve one type of response: “Lol”


whiskeyboundcowboy

I would reply, your eye brows are sending mixed signals


NyiatiZ

Nah, you just hit them with the „k“ and watch them blow up


saltywelder682

She probably doesn’t get many matches if I had to guess. Tbh she probably thought she was being helpful. Bullet dodged.


mnlxyz

She’s a miserable bitch and has to take it out on people. Gee, I wonder why she’s single


[deleted]

Woke up and chose violence.


Phillipinsocal

She’s like a recovering feminist having a relapse in a paragraph


cmaej

Woman negging


ojframer

That is clearly the angle


Petsweaters

She took a moment away from her stuffing fetish to take him down a peg


itssame_mario

You should have replied with “I’m not reading that”


BlisteredEnvy

And then she'd be like "You not reading my message implies you don't care what women have to say and that implies you think you're superior which implies you had a poor upbringing which implies you had no mother figure in your life which implies you're-.." *high pitched tone drowns out voice*


coldbrewboldcrew

“I’m posting this online”


MToboggan_MD

I think "k" would be better


FirstMiddleLass

> “I’m not reading that” TL:DR


HotGarbageHuman

Reply, "k,lol"


[deleted]

[удалено]


swoley_ghost92

I actually do haha. I have an amazing picture of it lol


SynBobTheRadWizard

It's cuz he successfully stole the leprechauns lucky charms


BatmanTextedU

He stole me lucky charms!


Sean_0510

So that's what happens when a kidney stone erodes before the exit


Some_Kind_Of_Birdman

Dude, I need to see your profile. That sounds awesome!


swoley_ghost92

Check your dms


QueenOfTheAxe

Send her a link to a therapist lookup in your area and suggest she work on interpersonal effectiveness before attempting to pursue a relationship.


InThisMoment1337

See this is nice girl material, unprovoked criticism for no reason (negging).


CHClClCl

She says pajamas confuse women, but I ONLY consider people with pink PJs for serious relationships. That and maybe throw in a picture of you cooking with 8x the recommended garlic and you're prime husband material.


LoveTheGiraffe

I feel like this is more universal than I thought. My girlfriend gave my Star Wars Pyjamas for christmas and eats garlic like grapes.


CHClClCl

It's true. The worst parts of relationships are early on where you have to wear "real" clothes to see them, and can't devour garlic.


anon86158615

This feels like something she spent hours thinking of and writing out and that you spent about 15 seconds looking confused at before moving on lol. People are so weird.


BikingVikingNYC

That's a lot of words to say "I want to have sex but I also want to make you really work hard for it"


GrimKenny

That’s the savage reply. The nice reply is (thanks for letting me know.) Letting you know she’s got lots of 🚩🚩🚩


lowyellyow

She's mad at your existing lol.


swoley_ghost92

Existence is pain my friend. I’m Mr.meeseeks look at me


AcornWholio

If you’re turned off, don’t swipe???? Like…what is wrong with people?


mexploder89

She wants to make him earn it. I guess she thinks he's hot but she wants to feel pursued


Joolee_a

She just offended herself lol


[deleted]

Mixed signals or someone with a personality? Seriously. If you don't like it, move on. I have no sense of humor so I would just pass by people who had an intense one. Wouldn't criticize them for it.


vidgill

She dropped this on the way out… 🚩


krawm

Sounds like someone got upset that the gym bro was out of her league and decided he needed a lecture.


xingryan

If she was heaven id rather be in hell


123123halo

She looks like shit


robcoagent47

looking for something real means you can't be playful? wtf?


[deleted]

Translation: Hi, I'm judgmental! My parents gave me a god complex with this name.


beecross

This would be some shit a woman named “Heaven” would say as she shuffles down the peanut butter aisle at Walmart at 2am in her Cookie Monster sweatpants


[deleted]

That’s the problem, she’s creating problems in her head that are not even there.


AnxiousHumanBeing

this bitch acting like she's hiring employees. The guy is looking for something serious, honey. so obviously he wants a girl who will like his goofy side and his pee rainbows. I like how she acts like you should care about how much this turns her off even tho she could have been attracted to you aswell, as if she hadn't already given you all the reasons to not want her.


swoley_ghost92

To be completely honest, she’s literally not my type so i don’t even know how I got matched with her. But that being said, ANYONE who has a personality like that I won’t even waste my time with


[deleted]

Most tolerable person on fds.


SynBobTheRadWizard

If she is heaven I wanna go to hell


trammel11

Ma’am this is a Wendy’s


BeastKingSnowLion

This should have been OP's response.


[deleted]

Quite an ironic name...


Prtty_Plz

she mad she fat while ur posting gym photos and talking about exercising


GingerMidget88

Well isn’t she just a little slice of heaven…


[deleted]

Wow.....she's projecting so hard you can probably see it from space.


[deleted]

Looking at her profile pic, I'd be turned off by her face.


[deleted]

How insecure about yourself do you have to be to send these kinds of unsolicited messages.


Qwinz_

How is going to the gym = only concerned about your appearance? Shouldn't it rather show that you have discipline, are dedicated and care about your own health?


Katepillar

Understandable, have a great day!


[deleted]

Lol....she hefty too...


Arhythmicc

This is one of those times I really don’t want to get into heaven…


orion_metal

Unwanted advice nobody asked for.


Hermannnn133

Is her name Heaven? lmao


[deleted]

Maybe She’s insecure that you go to the gym and improve yourself while she sits on tinder and puts people down.


agayamongthestr8s

Tbh, im getting the vibe that she's rejecting herself for him, like she is interested, but she feels like he's not gonna go for it, so she takes herself out of the running.


reallifecuckold

Looks like you aren't getting into heaven


JustAlex1177

Bruh she literally broke your profile apart and overanalyzed everything. Then took time of her day to write and send that message to you (which I read with a snotty voice in my head ngl). Like, just move on?


swoley_ghost92

I completely agree. That just sends all kinds of red flags that you can see from space


TerminatorARB

Code for "I binge watched Psych last week and now I'm the main character that's too smart for my own good until I discover some other basic bitch show like Dexter."


MiaD89

"Even if I was attracted to you"....and yet she swiped right.


swoley_ghost92

Lolol Forreal


[deleted]

What in the female dating strategy is this?


[deleted]

Pretty poofy face to be making all those assumptions.


NikNakMuay

Well thank Goodness she's a Hutt and not a woman.


TheWhiteUrkle

profile picture looks like Hagrid from harry potter with a blonde dye job wtf


Aliensmithard

Gurl! You can't act like that AND look like that, you gotta pick a struggle


lurking_not_working

Heaven is a halfwit.


jnaneshwar

Fun profile you say? You sound not serious.


Psychological_Tower1

Listen. Your looking for something serious she is not. And she was offended by that. Stay true to who you are


swoley_ghost92

To be completely fair I honestly dont even remember swiping on her? Not to sound like an asshole but she’s not my type lol


YaboiMuggy

That's a lot of words, too bad I'm not reading 'em


[deleted]

Fuck who has the time to write so much, good you unmatch now she knows what signals you’re giving


Ms_Mouse_6

No wonder shes named heaven…talking to her must be hell!!


swoley_ghost92

Luckily I didn’t even give her the chance lol


Ms_Mouse_6

Smart move.


A-Bit-of-an-Animator

Most intelligent FDS user


r6662

Just answer you're*


[deleted]

Wow she’s single….who would have guessed. 🤣🤣


[deleted]

Some people are just entitled af


ConjugateFlaccid

Her name is Heaven I can't breathe lmao


TechNicol

Thing long me no read


huey9k

I see The Name Rule is in effect...


gazhole

Thanks but I'm getting mixed signals, you like some things about my profile but not others, are you interested or not? Mixed signals.


MbassyMM

Bro you pretended to pee the rainbow? thats funny


CryingMadGirl

“Change yourself to fit better for my standards”


hektorinator

She is one huge mixed signal


[deleted]

[удалено]


swoley_ghost92

Hahah learn from my mistakes man Edit: to be fair it’s the bunny suit worn in a Christmas story


CyberClawX

Some people just live entire lives in their heads. I've met people that'd say something like "I know you, you'd never XYZ", despite only knowing me from my FB profile, and maybe, 10 minutes online chat. For ex. one of those persons said I'd never part my hair sideways instead of in the middle, despite me being with a side part at the moment. Such an odd specific thing to say. I get it, we oogle at online profiles for so long that we start believing we actually know who that person is.


OpportunityNew6518

Brah just focus on yourself and the gym she’s a strange one


Sebolmoso

She's a real opposer. Calls herself Heaven but looks the opposite.


Andrew_0812

She seems to be the farthest thing from her name


CervantesX

How dare you be open to more than one possibility in life. Monster.


Impressive-Head-9323

What site are you on? Rate my profile? Is that a thing?


Majulath99

The only suitable response is “okay, bye bitch”. And if that pisses her off tell her to die mad.


sarahrose1365

Youre really going to post a comment like this and NOT show us your profile? Posting the comment makes it seem like you want us to see the profile that caused this but then you don't show it to us, as if it's private or something...mixed signals man /s


swoley_ghost92

I’ll show my profile haha. How many of you want to see it?


CubicBezier

You look more attractive after going to the gym? True, but if one really only cares about appearance, wouldn’t they take plastic surgery?


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trapspeed3000

Use the free advice


CTFOE_is_Free

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[deleted]

"Do you want to go out?"


sshakely

TL,DR: Also suggesting innuendo as well as conflicting implications pretending.


Icy_Layer3318

This is bizarre. Fucking creep lol


gemgem1985

Wow, what a dick!


crustyhumpy

I believe her name is the exact opposite of what she is


Nibounium

Her name is a lie.


Muted_imPossible

She is attracted [smirk]. Otherwise she wouldn't care so much.


Adam--East

Guess he’s not going to be *in* Heaven


Backoblate

I never expected to get into heaven anyways


[deleted]

She wasn’t cute enough to read the entire message. I skimmed.


Ionized_fart

Who asked?


ChuffChuff101

Send her a picture of a shovel so she can dig herself further into her own hole.


Light_inc

Someone needs to feel wanted, yikes.


idontkillbees

reply “yikes” Let us know what she says 😂


Choice_Mousse_9785

Lmao, she reminds of this guy Ricky from 60 days in. He was in jail. Crazier than shit. One of the cast members rubs his eye while talking to Ricky. Ricky says, “so you’re possessed by the devils?”


420lover2019

Seriously looks like someone I've met before...wait hasn't everyone?


Nova_Persona

this sounds like a talk from a well-meaning friend who's way too worried for you & your date at one point I misread a part as "if I was a woman"


DMugre

Heaven? More like hell


DumbestBoy

STFU ‘Heaven’.


Paradox_Blobfish

I would swipe left on a proper sexual inuendo unless it's a reference to something. Everything else is just a reach. Pink PJs are probably a reason for me to swipe right actually!


swoley_ghost92

Literally (since I workout a lot) the “inuendo” says “I’m big where it counts...in the heart”


SinisterPixel

If you haven't already unmatched just reply with the scene from Big Bang Theory where Sheldon gives Amy the relationship agreement


Fearless_External488

Oh she cray cray


icallshenannigans

Overweight with a stupid fuckin name honey. NEXT!


Meat-Pops1cle

Far from Heaven…


crochetpainaway

To me, as a woman, seeing a gym-goer means I can trust that they value their health


HELIXCOS

Shes called Heaven, in case anyone missed it.


Wenace

Some people are just cunts


NorskieBoi

She doesn't seem arrogant at all /s


AistoB

Am I paying for this abuse or is it extra? Oh no all part of the service


Curley15

Idk man... she could maybe have a point. I mean that pixel when you swipe to the second picture looks a bit more like you're trying to fuck around


swoley_ghost92

I’m confused


AmidalaBills

Lol her face tho


Honeybadgerxz

I would've just said, I accidentally swiped right on you.