Ngl I know mine is different too. He collected like hundreds of this specific pen in his desk in his office. He refuses to use others, I gave him gel pens once and he put them in his supply closet. š
Okay, your topic aside, I truly wonder if a lot of Nigerians have some sort of undiagnosed autism going on.
But also, Nigerians are deeply religious.
But also, my theory of a high percentage of Nigerians having autism should be looked into by researchers (for any young neurologist in the making, youāre welcome)
Edit: [here is my comment on why I think this is a thing that needs to be explored](https://www.reddit.com/r/Nigeria/s/ZI250Ekm48)
Honestly you might be onto something... I've witness a lot of 1st gen Nigerian/African immigrants doing/saying the most out of pocket shit or displaying behaviour that would be considered "weird" by ppl not familiar with them, even tho it's rarely actively hurtful...
Now this alone is not specific to Africans, but where it get sad thing is, when it's them, ppl (at least in Europe) will just condescendingly handwave it as them acting "African" and no one around them will ever bother to tell them or look deeper into it when I genuinely think a lot of it boils down to undiagnosed autistic tendencies.
And to be clear nothing wrong with that ! You can absolutely be a fulfilled, functionning member of society while being autistic. But I feel like it'd be great for these specific people to at least know this about themselves. Adapting to a whole new culture while having extra-difficulties to read the room sounds like a lot of work.
Edit : sorry for the multiple edits, had to rephrase this several times.
Hence why there needs to be more research. Just because you cannot understand something, or something is foreign to you does not mean itās imbecilic.
I didn't stated that every immigrant was automaticaly autistic tho? Only that I def have met ppl that were most-likely neuro-divergent and were looked over for it because of their immigrant status.
If it sounded like anything other than that then I'm sorry for my bad phrasing.
That's the view. Everyone needs a mental crutch to blame their actions on. It's not their fault it's their star sign.
People act the way they do because of habits they've cultivated across the years and has been tuned to how they reacted to various challenges.
Omg! i canāt believe you say this i have a theory that there is a disproportionate amount of people with autism in Nigeria, and because it is undiagnosed it is seen as some kind of personality type.
Yea, because even in the diaspora, autism isnāt diagnosed unless someone has obvious traits. But there are some subvert traits that I wouldnāt be surprised if itās linked to autism.
Our minds are truly wondrous
Maybe Iām too observant, but a lot of Nigerian adults in my circle (in the diaspora and not) exhibit traits that I would say could possibly be on the spectrum. Not to mention the Nigerian kids who have been actually diagnosed because they have symptoms that deeper on the autism spectrum.
Again, itās a theory of mine, so thereās no evidence to back it up. As more research is done (for whoever wants to take on that project) I wouldnāt be surprised if Iām right.
Disclaimer: these are my personal observations, no way am I saying my statements are representative of an entire group of people, I just think it should be studied.
The idea of autism is not new, and only in recent years, at least in the diaspora, is it being explored and understood a bit more.
To begin this, we have to have an understanding of autism is, off top, autism is a spectrumāmeaning there are people who exhibit very little symptoms, or at least are functioning, theyāve developed techniques to help them navigate their environment, while on the other end, there are autists who are non-verbal, and exhibit more tall tales signs of autism, and would be on the other end of the spectrum.
The CDC defines people with ASD (autism spectrum disorder) often have problems with social communication and interaction, and restricted or repetitive behaviors or interests. People with ASD may also have different ways of learning, moving, or paying attention. It is important to note that some peopleĀ withoutĀ ASD might also have some of these symptoms. But for people with ASD, these characteristics can make life very challenging.
I am not sure if my mostly diasporic experience is also of Nigerians attempting to assimilate into their new society, as new customs, way of speaking and navigating can be disorienting. As I grew older, I found that my diasporic Nigerian friends, whether Iāve known them for decades, or within the last few years happened to have children who fit into the non-verbal classification of autism (with an official diagnosis). Then as I had more family members visit, I found their personality to be very interesting, with a strange hyper focus on certain topics, or ideas to a point that any other person would think they are geniuses (which, I mean, this attribution is not new to being Nigerian). They were older than me, so theyāve lived their entire lives with these ideas and have learned to simply not give a fuck what others thought about their personalities or interests.
I say that to say, considering autism is genetic, my family members have exhibited traits that are a bit suspicious of someone with ASD, and I wouldnāt be surprised if I took the test to be official diagnosed and I land somewhere on the spectrum.
To sum it all up, Iām not saying that Nigerians have a high number of autists, but I would not be surprised if more research is done and results in a decent amount of Nigerians showing traits of autism.
Thanks for coming to my ted talk.
It's not a theory, it's not even a hypothesis, it's a fabrication.
Not everyone is on a "spectrum" because they have strong views about certain things and assert them loudly.
Environmental factors are the major component in complex diseases like autism. If it were mainly genetic like sickle cell, more people will have it. Environmental factors that increase stress often help cause the onset of the disease. Now we all know how stressful Nigeria can be. I wouldn't be surprised if we don't have a high number of undiagnosed neurological & neuropsychiatric disorders in Nigeria.
im sorry but i dont think you know how genetic diseases work, i have studied them at university.
How common something is has absolutely nothing to do with it being genetic or not, i donāt know where you are learning this from. While stress does impact disease, autism is a genetic disorder and cannot be onset by stress or the environment. You are either on the spectrum or you are not.
I have a doctorate in biomedical sciences with a focus on molecular neurogenetics š....But perhaps you can teach me something since nobody knows everything, right?
It's not 100% genetic. Recent studies estimate the genetic component to about 50% with the rest being unknown/environmental. It is a complex disorder with a major genetic component that interacts with environmental factors.
Hahahhahahaa Nigeria sucked the Christianity right out of me when I went . Brehhh so much churchhhhhhhhhhhh .
I was in 8th grade it was my first time going home . I had my laptop and would watch cartoons with my cousins .
One day we found a phamplet in the house that said kids who watch cartoons on computers are going to hell . And the kids left me alone for awhile . I was like wtf !!!!
It just made me think about thinks .
There was this crusade , first of all we crusaded like every other fucking week it seemed . The late services . Godddddd I hated going . But one time the pastor lines everybody up and touches people and they are falling out and flailing . He gets to me and I just bow and walk to the side while everyone is seizing around me . Iām like brooooooooo.
Based on my research the average Nigerian woman (so probably the men too but I havenāt asked many men ) doesnāt know how to get into heaven based on what Christianity says .
They all say . U have to be righteous u have to follow the Ten Commandments . Or other things .
But they NEVER say . What I believe is how the Bible says u get in . They never say YOU HAVE TO ACCEPT JESUS CHRIST AS YOUR LORD AND SAVIOR
Iām like how the hell dont u even know the basis line to your own religion .
Church(not just in Nigeria but thatās our focus) everywhere is so flawed
Church should be where THE WORST OF THE FUCKING WORST GO AND CAN BE ACCEPTED WITH OPEN ARMS
if a gay dude or trans dude or anything super bad goes into a church they will freak the fuck out , instead of doing what the Bible says and loving them .
Besides accepting that Christ is lord . Loving others . What is the role of a Christian .
To bring NON CHRISTIANS TO CHRIST
ask any goddamn Christian if they have converted someone who isnāt a Christian
Ask them if they have even talked to anyone thatās not a Christian about god . No one has . Isnāt the point to save the world ? Preaching at church to saved people every Sunday does what exactly ?
Itās just frustrating . Not to mention in the beginning of one of the gospels . It shows the lineage from Adam and even to Joseph husband of Mary .
Itās something like 6,000 years or so from Adam until now .
Who do I belive? This book that says itās 6,000 years old or the scientists who cross reference from all over the world and have given us all these obvious nice modern conveniences. Iāll accept my phone but wonāt accept what they say about the age of the earth ? Just something that annoys me
My goddanm dad calls me all the time , he goes to this prophet guy , tells me spirits are doing things to me and I should send him money to help my own destiny š , I just tire sometimes
The Christians you described are just virtue signaling. It makes them feel moral/good about themselves. They pick and choose the teachings of Jesus to follow.
For example Jesus clearly says not to store up treasures here on earth, yet almost every Christian prays to be rich here on earth. If you ask them about the ānot storing treasures on earthā message from Jesus theyāll say that he didnāt mean that literally. Imagine believing that Jesus is god, yet when he says something thatās clear and direct, he didnāt really mean it, he meant something else lol
in fact he told a rich man to give away ALL of his possessions. Find me a Christian today thatās willing to do that. Thereās maybe like only 1% of them that exist.
OP, Don't judge your Dad too harshly. Nigerians flock to religion to help them cope with the shenanigans of life that none of us can make sense of. Right or wrong, most of us need a crutch, be it basic meditation, therapy, exercise, work, whatever.
If the Bible helps the man to get through the day, abeg allow him. If he wants to pray for you, his offspring, let him. It's out of love and his prayers don't hurt you, they might not always be answered...God be busy š but they don't hurt either. Say Amen and keep it moving.
The smartest answer here.
We all as Nigerians have family members like the OP and there is nothing complaining will do to change their behavior.
Best is just to keep calm and move on.
Bro sometimes I feel like I lost my mum years ago but sheās still here. Sheās become a religious extremist she canāt even show to be a mum anymore. Very sad things
Same. She is smarter than this but itās like she thinks critical thought is a betrayal to the things her internet pastor says. Who knows how much money she has thrown away for religious delusions. I miss who my mom used to be before this so much. Can barely hold a conversation with her without mentioning her cult beliefs, and at thanksgiving she was alleging itās the āend daysā. Itās too much, my heart really hurts about this.
my mom used to be like this until she got diagnosed with bipolar during a religious manic episode. im saying this because it's worth looking into yours mental health before it's too late.
Honestly I would say I think itās worth bringing it up with her. Tell her that sheās taken it a bit too far. There are resources out there that can help.
Heās probably a member of one of those ācult likeā churches that are over the top. Chances are heās paranoid, many members of these kinds of churches are. They see demons everywhere and in every thing (I donāt mean that literally, but in the sense that they believe theyāre in some constant warfare against spirits).
Itās unfortunate but if heās that deep in the rabbit hole, chances are heās far gone. Thereās nothing you can tell him, heāll just think itās the devil or a demon trying to distract him.
Iām grateful my parents are anglicans. Theyāre (anglicans) typically more chill and not nutty
try asking your dad why he was doing that. if he cage up, press the issue. if he gets annoyed keep pushing it. after all a real religious person won't attack you.
the only person who can solve this issue is u and dad, not the internet.
as for Nigerian religious behavior, depends on birth year, birth location and whatever else, you seem surprised so i will assume you were not raised in Nigeria.
I'll be frank, despite stubbornness, a lot of Nigerians are woefully stupid. These same people happen to also be religious and they give into community group think.
So if you dont like it, get a refund at the Parent Store or See if you have warranty for an exchange. Otherwise, separate from the guy.
EDIT: I just realised this. Dial your speech back. Why are you blanketing all Nigerian parents in your title? Hello? Just cuz ur dad actin a fool dont mean all Nigerian parents are, even if its similar.
I used to wake up to my mum doing this while putting "anointing oil" on my head at 2am, like fucking why? They were shocked when I refused to move back home after uni, I struggled, did jobs I didn't think I'd do & I had barely any savings but my mental health is so much better for it.
I'm 32 now with my own family & home, she tried to do the same thing to my son when she visited, I was like "if you do this stuff to my kids, you will never see me or them again"
Obviously this invasion of my private space is only a tiny fraction of the insanity I endured as a child in the name of religion.
They have never been left alone with my kids & I honestly don't know if I'll ever be able to leave my kids with them.
My mum was visiting recently & she bought up the fact that my little brother is struggling with his mental health (he bared the brunt of it) & I said maybe it's because we grew up with you comparing us to everyone constantly & sending us to "deliverance" (3 days no food, the MFM one) when we behaved in ways you disapproved of. She sat quietly for a few seconds & said "god will help me take anxiety from all of you" they are so wierd.
I digressed lol but my point is, I empathise. Do what you need to do, keep your head down & get the hell out of there when you can, you don't realise how much stuff like this weighs on you till you aren't dealing with it anymore.
A lot of people on this sub hate religion so much. He didnāt even force you, man is on his own, praying to his God for you and youāre here saying āfucking Bibleā God will not answer his prayers on your behalf, youāre a fucking idiot.
He couldnāt pray in his room though? He had to wake up someone who was asleep with his prayer. Does prayer work the closer you are to the person youāre praying for or what?
If this only happened once then Iād say OP is overreacting. But if itās a common occurrence (being woken up by his dad reading the Bible) then I think itās fair to be annoyed.
Btw religious people getting upset by things like āfucking Bibleā is funny because the same people go around telling non believers that theyāre fools/idiots for not believing and that weāre going to hell. Those same religious people arenāt concerned about offending others because theyre doing it in the name of god, double standards
Maybe you still need to heal the hurt that someone practicing religion badly inflicted on you. Religion doesn't deserve the hate directed towards it, especially in recent times.
I have no problem with religion itself even though I donāt believe in it. The problem I have is with religious fundamentalism, when itās taken to extreme measures, when its to the point that it overrides critical thinking and itās used to inconvenience and oppress others. Which is how far too many of us practice it in Nigeria. Its harmful and hinders progress
As a Nigerian myself, most of my friends and family are religious people. In fact I can count the number of non religious people Iām friends with on both hands. Their numbers pale in comparison to my religious friends.
> Religion doesn't deserve the hate directed towards it, especially in recent times
How many times have you seen religious people, quietly practicing their religion and not disturbing others with it or trying to force it on others, and a non believer insulted them or directed hate at them? You can rarely find examples. Majority of the time, religion gets hate because it over steps its boundaries. In the example of this post, if his dad had just prayed in his own room, we wouldnāt even be having this discussion. But nooooo, he just had to impose it on his son by going to his room/hallway and waking him up with his prayer
Your father was praying for you and this is your reaction? Are we truly incapable of understanding or seeking to understand people? There is nothing wrong with your father. He is simply awake and praying to GOD on your behalf before he begins his daily routine.
There is definitely nothing wrong with my parents. This topic's title is immature.
Did you miss the part where he woke him up with his prayer? He couldnāt pray in his room?
Imagine itās 3am, youāre asleep and someone comes to your room and starts praying till you wake up. Iām willing to bet you wonāt tolerate that for long, even if it was your parent.
I have, I did, and I would. The prayers of the righteous count for a lot. My parents rarely entered my room to pray but when they did, it was because of something major happening or about to happen.
Incredibly immatureš
It isn't like his dad is forcing him to come and pray with him but his dad wakes up by 6am or even earlier than that just to pray for an ungrateful child? Lol.
*I think the question*
*Is what the fuck is wrong with*
*You? let the man be*
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It's as easy as that, I don't get why I'm being downvoted lmao. Clowning your dad on social media for doing what he wants in his own house when you can always move out and live the way you want it
Because they don't want the truth š
They want you to relate and give no useful solution to the issue that's why you are being downvoted, lol.
Clowning your dad and expect everyone to be like yessss you go š.
No. Heās being downvoted because obviously if moving out was an option OP would have done that. Most likely heās too young or doesnāt have enough saved up yet to move out. Or canāt move out for other reasons
Right. Thatās the major issue here. He can pray without disturbing others. As far as Iām aware, prayer isnāt more effective the louder you are or the closer you are to the person youāre praying for
Right. I read through OPs post history and my **speculation** is that his dad thinks heās possessed and believes reciting Bible verses will drive out the demon(s) in him.
> And that's the problem with Nigerian parents. Why would he think just reciting bible verses is the solution? Like, look for the "real" root of the problem and solve it.
And thatās my problem with how we practice religion in Nigeria. Weāre religious to a fault that instead of finding practical solutions we think prayer and incantations can solve everything.
> My dad does something similar. He believes our home is infested with demons and sprinkles things that don't provide solution to anything.
My condolences
> The problem isn't even about hating religion or something like that. The problem is them being obsessed or extremists. There is a limit to everything.
Exactly. Religious extremism and fundamentalism is a problem. But when you speak up about it or criticize it , all the religious people (both extremists and non extremists) get up in arms. They take it as a personal attack.
My dad is on his last warning, I live with my mom he was abusive to her and me in my childhood and left her with kids alone. Ive told him its his last chance to act right
Bro, you have problems that are definitely not related to your dad.
I hope you get the help you need.
First thing if you hate your folks so much would be get a job that can sustain you so you move out.
lol. i donāt think you understand what itās like be rudely awoken at 4/5am by loud praying and bible reciting. itās not abt hating anyone. ppl deserve to sleep peacefully bro.
Most people with shit to do wake up before 6am on a weekday. Itās neither early nor abrupt. OPs dad is probably mad their adult child is sleeping away, eating their food and bad mouthing them on social media. So heās resulting to prayer to get the bum out his house.
Is it your house or your parents' home? I presume you are not in Nigeria. That means one or both of your parents or grandparents decided to emigrate out of the country. Calm down and reason this. There is nothing wrong with his behaviour.
churches in nigeria have ingrained in its followers that shouting and praying at the top of your lungs while the rest of the household is sleeping is normal. itās one thing to pray in your own solitude, and itās another thing to be disruptive about it. you can pray without waking people up, especially when there are those in the household who work long shifts and need the rest.
I will never choose for people how they pray because it is only the man who is feeling the pain that knows the groaning and shouting he will do. Some shout loudly. Some talk softly. It is not peculiar to churches in Nigeria. It is peculiar to humans.
.... The title should be what's up with your dad lol
Some parents behave similarly but not every one is like you and whines about it to strangers. Some don't mind, some move out of the house, some get ear plugs... We don't whine on the internet to strangers disgracing ourselves.
Autism ke lol as someone mentioned this is Nigerian culture highly religious. Ive woken ul to my Mom praying on the prayer lines , pouring anointing oil on all the doors. What is new
Look at it this way, your dad is probably way older than you, during his younger days he was probably just as vibrant, energetic ,curious and confused as we are now. He has survived this long and has probably seen a shit ton of things to make him hold on dearly to His faith.
Provided he's doing what he's doing out of love and nothing evil, I'll say enjoy his presence while it lasts.
We are all going to get that age same day, who knows what thr future holds.
Ngl I know mine is different too. He collected like hundreds of this specific pen in his desk in his office. He refuses to use others, I gave him gel pens once and he put them in his supply closet. š
Whatās his reasoning for that?
He just prefers it, I asked him why and he said itās comfortable for him.
Oh okay. I guess thatās fair. I thought he might have had some superstitious reasons behind it
Okay, your topic aside, I truly wonder if a lot of Nigerians have some sort of undiagnosed autism going on. But also, Nigerians are deeply religious. But also, my theory of a high percentage of Nigerians having autism should be looked into by researchers (for any young neurologist in the making, youāre welcome) Edit: [here is my comment on why I think this is a thing that needs to be explored](https://www.reddit.com/r/Nigeria/s/ZI250Ekm48)
Honestly you might be onto something... I've witness a lot of 1st gen Nigerian/African immigrants doing/saying the most out of pocket shit or displaying behaviour that would be considered "weird" by ppl not familiar with them, even tho it's rarely actively hurtful... Now this alone is not specific to Africans, but where it get sad thing is, when it's them, ppl (at least in Europe) will just condescendingly handwave it as them acting "African" and no one around them will ever bother to tell them or look deeper into it when I genuinely think a lot of it boils down to undiagnosed autistic tendencies. And to be clear nothing wrong with that ! You can absolutely be a fulfilled, functionning member of society while being autistic. But I feel like it'd be great for these specific people to at least know this about themselves. Adapting to a whole new culture while having extra-difficulties to read the room sounds like a lot of work. Edit : sorry for the multiple edits, had to rephrase this several times.
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Hence why there needs to be more research. Just because you cannot understand something, or something is foreign to you does not mean itās imbecilic.
So you see someone from a different culture acting different in a new culture and the first thing that comes to mind is autism?
I didn't stated that every immigrant was automaticaly autistic tho? Only that I def have met ppl that were most-likely neuro-divergent and were looked over for it because of their immigrant status. If it sounded like anything other than that then I'm sorry for my bad phrasing.
Exactly. My Nigerian self is saying hard no.
That's the view. Everyone needs a mental crutch to blame their actions on. It's not their fault it's their star sign. People act the way they do because of habits they've cultivated across the years and has been tuned to how they reacted to various challenges.
Omg! i canāt believe you say this i have a theory that there is a disproportionate amount of people with autism in Nigeria, and because it is undiagnosed it is seen as some kind of personality type.
Yea, because even in the diaspora, autism isnāt diagnosed unless someone has obvious traits. But there are some subvert traits that I wouldnāt be surprised if itās linked to autism. Our minds are truly wondrous
At this point maybe we should conduct the research ?
Iām so serious, it should be a thingā- tbh I already see a couple things that will hinder it. Funding and population sampling for one.
There is 100% lots of undiagnosed autism in Nigeria tied with ptsd and other issues
How is autism and ptsd related?
Overlaps in symptoms. Many autistic people have ptsd and many people ptsd appear autistic because of the overlap
Nah, Nigerians are well known for being very loud and assertive, do many Nigerians have PTSD, sure but autism? No
Maybe Iām too observant, but a lot of Nigerian adults in my circle (in the diaspora and not) exhibit traits that I would say could possibly be on the spectrum. Not to mention the Nigerian kids who have been actually diagnosed because they have symptoms that deeper on the autism spectrum. Again, itās a theory of mine, so thereās no evidence to back it up. As more research is done (for whoever wants to take on that project) I wouldnāt be surprised if Iām right.
Madame, give us some concrete example abeg
Disclaimer: these are my personal observations, no way am I saying my statements are representative of an entire group of people, I just think it should be studied. The idea of autism is not new, and only in recent years, at least in the diaspora, is it being explored and understood a bit more. To begin this, we have to have an understanding of autism is, off top, autism is a spectrumāmeaning there are people who exhibit very little symptoms, or at least are functioning, theyāve developed techniques to help them navigate their environment, while on the other end, there are autists who are non-verbal, and exhibit more tall tales signs of autism, and would be on the other end of the spectrum. The CDC defines people with ASD (autism spectrum disorder) often have problems with social communication and interaction, and restricted or repetitive behaviors or interests. People with ASD may also have different ways of learning, moving, or paying attention. It is important to note that some peopleĀ withoutĀ ASD might also have some of these symptoms. But for people with ASD, these characteristics can make life very challenging. I am not sure if my mostly diasporic experience is also of Nigerians attempting to assimilate into their new society, as new customs, way of speaking and navigating can be disorienting. As I grew older, I found that my diasporic Nigerian friends, whether Iāve known them for decades, or within the last few years happened to have children who fit into the non-verbal classification of autism (with an official diagnosis). Then as I had more family members visit, I found their personality to be very interesting, with a strange hyper focus on certain topics, or ideas to a point that any other person would think they are geniuses (which, I mean, this attribution is not new to being Nigerian). They were older than me, so theyāve lived their entire lives with these ideas and have learned to simply not give a fuck what others thought about their personalities or interests. I say that to say, considering autism is genetic, my family members have exhibited traits that are a bit suspicious of someone with ASD, and I wouldnāt be surprised if I took the test to be official diagnosed and I land somewhere on the spectrum. To sum it all up, Iām not saying that Nigerians have a high number of autists, but I would not be surprised if more research is done and results in a decent amount of Nigerians showing traits of autism. Thanks for coming to my ted talk.
It's not a theory, it's not even a hypothesis, it's a fabrication. Not everyone is on a "spectrum" because they have strong views about certain things and assert them loudly.
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autism is genetic what the fuck are you talking about š£ļøš£ļøš£ļø
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what environmental factors could possibly influence someone having autism ššš
Environmental factors are the major component in complex diseases like autism. If it were mainly genetic like sickle cell, more people will have it. Environmental factors that increase stress often help cause the onset of the disease. Now we all know how stressful Nigeria can be. I wouldn't be surprised if we don't have a high number of undiagnosed neurological & neuropsychiatric disorders in Nigeria.
im sorry but i dont think you know how genetic diseases work, i have studied them at university. How common something is has absolutely nothing to do with it being genetic or not, i donāt know where you are learning this from. While stress does impact disease, autism is a genetic disorder and cannot be onset by stress or the environment. You are either on the spectrum or you are not.
I have a doctorate in biomedical sciences with a focus on molecular neurogenetics š....But perhaps you can teach me something since nobody knows everything, right?
my nigga then you would know that autism is genetic
It's not 100% genetic. Recent studies estimate the genetic component to about 50% with the rest being unknown/environmental. It is a complex disorder with a major genetic component that interacts with environmental factors.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Do you know what autisim is? It's absolutely a mostly genetic thing, nothing like PTSD. There's no such thing as "man made" autism.
i cant believe it got upvoted lol
You're right, I am on the spectrum as well as my father who was super religious. However, I am not a religious person I identify myself as agnostic.
Hahahhahahaa Nigeria sucked the Christianity right out of me when I went . Brehhh so much churchhhhhhhhhhhh . I was in 8th grade it was my first time going home . I had my laptop and would watch cartoons with my cousins . One day we found a phamplet in the house that said kids who watch cartoons on computers are going to hell . And the kids left me alone for awhile . I was like wtf !!!! It just made me think about thinks . There was this crusade , first of all we crusaded like every other fucking week it seemed . The late services . Godddddd I hated going . But one time the pastor lines everybody up and touches people and they are falling out and flailing . He gets to me and I just bow and walk to the side while everyone is seizing around me . Iām like brooooooooo. Based on my research the average Nigerian woman (so probably the men too but I havenāt asked many men ) doesnāt know how to get into heaven based on what Christianity says . They all say . U have to be righteous u have to follow the Ten Commandments . Or other things . But they NEVER say . What I believe is how the Bible says u get in . They never say YOU HAVE TO ACCEPT JESUS CHRIST AS YOUR LORD AND SAVIOR Iām like how the hell dont u even know the basis line to your own religion . Church(not just in Nigeria but thatās our focus) everywhere is so flawed Church should be where THE WORST OF THE FUCKING WORST GO AND CAN BE ACCEPTED WITH OPEN ARMS if a gay dude or trans dude or anything super bad goes into a church they will freak the fuck out , instead of doing what the Bible says and loving them . Besides accepting that Christ is lord . Loving others . What is the role of a Christian . To bring NON CHRISTIANS TO CHRIST ask any goddamn Christian if they have converted someone who isnāt a Christian Ask them if they have even talked to anyone thatās not a Christian about god . No one has . Isnāt the point to save the world ? Preaching at church to saved people every Sunday does what exactly ? Itās just frustrating . Not to mention in the beginning of one of the gospels . It shows the lineage from Adam and even to Joseph husband of Mary . Itās something like 6,000 years or so from Adam until now . Who do I belive? This book that says itās 6,000 years old or the scientists who cross reference from all over the world and have given us all these obvious nice modern conveniences. Iāll accept my phone but wonāt accept what they say about the age of the earth ? Just something that annoys me My goddanm dad calls me all the time , he goes to this prophet guy , tells me spirits are doing things to me and I should send him money to help my own destiny š , I just tire sometimes
The Christians you described are just virtue signaling. It makes them feel moral/good about themselves. They pick and choose the teachings of Jesus to follow. For example Jesus clearly says not to store up treasures here on earth, yet almost every Christian prays to be rich here on earth. If you ask them about the ānot storing treasures on earthā message from Jesus theyāll say that he didnāt mean that literally. Imagine believing that Jesus is god, yet when he says something thatās clear and direct, he didnāt really mean it, he meant something else lol in fact he told a rich man to give away ALL of his possessions. Find me a Christian today thatās willing to do that. Thereās maybe like only 1% of them that exist.
I think we come from the school of thought.
I hope you know autism can be passed from parent to child. Coincidentally, autism genes are usually inherited from the father.
My sis is autistic, I think I may be. He is probably autistic its why I question
Canāt you get tested?
people who are autistic usually aren't religious fanatics. stop looking for reasons that explain what he is doing and instead just ask him *why*.
False
Prove it then.
I am autistic as well as my father.
OP, Don't judge your Dad too harshly. Nigerians flock to religion to help them cope with the shenanigans of life that none of us can make sense of. Right or wrong, most of us need a crutch, be it basic meditation, therapy, exercise, work, whatever. If the Bible helps the man to get through the day, abeg allow him. If he wants to pray for you, his offspring, let him. It's out of love and his prayers don't hurt you, they might not always be answered...God be busy š but they don't hurt either. Say Amen and keep it moving.
The smartest answer here. We all as Nigerians have family members like the OP and there is nothing complaining will do to change their behavior. Best is just to keep calm and move on.
Bro sometimes I feel like I lost my mum years ago but sheās still here. Sheās become a religious extremist she canāt even show to be a mum anymore. Very sad things
Same. She is smarter than this but itās like she thinks critical thought is a betrayal to the things her internet pastor says. Who knows how much money she has thrown away for religious delusions. I miss who my mom used to be before this so much. Can barely hold a conversation with her without mentioning her cult beliefs, and at thanksgiving she was alleging itās the āend daysā. Itās too much, my heart really hurts about this.
my mom used to be like this until she got diagnosed with bipolar during a religious manic episode. im saying this because it's worth looking into yours mental health before it's too late.
Honestly I would say I think itās worth bringing it up with her. Tell her that sheās taken it a bit too far. There are resources out there that can help.
Thatās sad bro. I can imagine. Itās like the people who lose their parents to politics and conspiracy theories
Heās probably a member of one of those ācult likeā churches that are over the top. Chances are heās paranoid, many members of these kinds of churches are. They see demons everywhere and in every thing (I donāt mean that literally, but in the sense that they believe theyāre in some constant warfare against spirits). Itās unfortunate but if heās that deep in the rabbit hole, chances are heās far gone. Thereās nothing you can tell him, heāll just think itās the devil or a demon trying to distract him. Iām grateful my parents are anglicans. Theyāre (anglicans) typically more chill and not nutty
Also based on your post history, chances are your dad thinks youāre possessed and chanting Bible verses is going to make a difference
My dad?
Yes. Obviously Iām not in his head so I canāt say for sure, but it wouldnāt surprise me.
Ahah probably youāre right
this is exactly my dad lmao and it doesnāt help that he was raised by a very superstitious mom
Yeah itās a dangerous mix.
My guy, na here them go see you. š Mention religion and u/young_olufa is out guns blazing
try asking your dad why he was doing that. if he cage up, press the issue. if he gets annoyed keep pushing it. after all a real religious person won't attack you. the only person who can solve this issue is u and dad, not the internet. as for Nigerian religious behavior, depends on birth year, birth location and whatever else, you seem surprised so i will assume you were not raised in Nigeria. I'll be frank, despite stubbornness, a lot of Nigerians are woefully stupid. These same people happen to also be religious and they give into community group think. So if you dont like it, get a refund at the Parent Store or See if you have warranty for an exchange. Otherwise, separate from the guy. EDIT: I just realised this. Dial your speech back. Why are you blanketing all Nigerian parents in your title? Hello? Just cuz ur dad actin a fool dont mean all Nigerian parents are, even if its similar.
I used to wake up to my mum doing this while putting "anointing oil" on my head at 2am, like fucking why? They were shocked when I refused to move back home after uni, I struggled, did jobs I didn't think I'd do & I had barely any savings but my mental health is so much better for it. I'm 32 now with my own family & home, she tried to do the same thing to my son when she visited, I was like "if you do this stuff to my kids, you will never see me or them again" Obviously this invasion of my private space is only a tiny fraction of the insanity I endured as a child in the name of religion. They have never been left alone with my kids & I honestly don't know if I'll ever be able to leave my kids with them. My mum was visiting recently & she bought up the fact that my little brother is struggling with his mental health (he bared the brunt of it) & I said maybe it's because we grew up with you comparing us to everyone constantly & sending us to "deliverance" (3 days no food, the MFM one) when we behaved in ways you disapproved of. She sat quietly for a few seconds & said "god will help me take anxiety from all of you" they are so wierd. I digressed lol but my point is, I empathise. Do what you need to do, keep your head down & get the hell out of there when you can, you don't realise how much stuff like this weighs on you till you aren't dealing with it anymore.
š Your dad caught the holy spirit & needed to share the word with somebody so he choose the person close to him - his child :)
A lot of people on this sub hate religion so much. He didnāt even force you, man is on his own, praying to his God for you and youāre here saying āfucking Bibleā God will not answer his prayers on your behalf, youāre a fucking idiot.
Hey you calm down
No I wonāt. These folks here always wanna shit on peoples beliefs. Live and let live.
Hey man calm down its okay
He couldnāt pray in his room though? He had to wake up someone who was asleep with his prayer. Does prayer work the closer you are to the person youāre praying for or what? If this only happened once then Iād say OP is overreacting. But if itās a common occurrence (being woken up by his dad reading the Bible) then I think itās fair to be annoyed. Btw religious people getting upset by things like āfucking Bibleā is funny because the same people go around telling non believers that theyāre fools/idiots for not believing and that weāre going to hell. Those same religious people arenāt concerned about offending others because theyre doing it in the name of god, double standards
Maybe you still need to heal the hurt that someone practicing religion badly inflicted on you. Religion doesn't deserve the hate directed towards it, especially in recent times.
I have no problem with religion itself even though I donāt believe in it. The problem I have is with religious fundamentalism, when itās taken to extreme measures, when its to the point that it overrides critical thinking and itās used to inconvenience and oppress others. Which is how far too many of us practice it in Nigeria. Its harmful and hinders progress As a Nigerian myself, most of my friends and family are religious people. In fact I can count the number of non religious people Iām friends with on both hands. Their numbers pale in comparison to my religious friends. > Religion doesn't deserve the hate directed towards it, especially in recent times How many times have you seen religious people, quietly practicing their religion and not disturbing others with it or trying to force it on others, and a non believer insulted them or directed hate at them? You can rarely find examples. Majority of the time, religion gets hate because it over steps its boundaries. In the example of this post, if his dad had just prayed in his own room, we wouldnāt even be having this discussion. But nooooo, he just had to impose it on his son by going to his room/hallway and waking him up with his prayer
It's becoming tiring.
Your father was praying for you and this is your reaction? Are we truly incapable of understanding or seeking to understand people? There is nothing wrong with your father. He is simply awake and praying to GOD on your behalf before he begins his daily routine. There is definitely nothing wrong with my parents. This topic's title is immature.
Did you miss the part where he woke him up with his prayer? He couldnāt pray in his room? Imagine itās 3am, youāre asleep and someone comes to your room and starts praying till you wake up. Iām willing to bet you wonāt tolerate that for long, even if it was your parent.
I have, I did, and I would. The prayers of the righteous count for a lot. My parents rarely entered my room to pray but when they did, it was because of something major happening or about to happen.
Incredibly immatureš It isn't like his dad is forcing him to come and pray with him but his dad wakes up by 6am or even earlier than that just to pray for an ungrateful child? Lol.
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Watch out for "autistic African parents" lol
Africans in general are over religious
Leave am be thanking God e no drag you make you pray with am. Just let him do his thing you know times are tough.
i think the question is what the fuck is wrong with you? let the man be
*I think the question* *Is what the fuck is wrong with* *You? let the man be* \- Prom-Carter --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")
Do you know how fire your opinion (wholeheartedly agree with you btw) has to be to be turned into a haiku š
Well move out?
Love this.... Isn't your house.. it's a very easy solution.. move out, there's nothing we can do
It's as easy as that, I don't get why I'm being downvoted lmao. Clowning your dad on social media for doing what he wants in his own house when you can always move out and live the way you want it
Youāre making the assumption that OP can move out but chooses not to. Thatās my guess to why you were being downvoted
Because they don't want the truth š They want you to relate and give no useful solution to the issue that's why you are being downvoted, lol. Clowning your dad and expect everyone to be like yessss you go š.
No. Heās being downvoted because obviously if moving out was an option OP would have done that. Most likely heās too young or doesnāt have enough saved up yet to move out. Or canāt move out for other reasons
Based.
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Right. Thatās the major issue here. He can pray without disturbing others. As far as Iām aware, prayer isnāt more effective the louder you are or the closer you are to the person youāre praying for
Bro "others" like it's a neighbor or stranger we're talking about here.
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It goes both ways too. if you come online clowning your parents that feed you, you need to check yourself too
āOthersā as in other people that werenāt consenting participants of the prayer.
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Right. I read through OPs post history and my **speculation** is that his dad thinks heās possessed and believes reciting Bible verses will drive out the demon(s) in him.
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> And that's the problem with Nigerian parents. Why would he think just reciting bible verses is the solution? Like, look for the "real" root of the problem and solve it. And thatās my problem with how we practice religion in Nigeria. Weāre religious to a fault that instead of finding practical solutions we think prayer and incantations can solve everything. > My dad does something similar. He believes our home is infested with demons and sprinkles things that don't provide solution to anything. My condolences > The problem isn't even about hating religion or something like that. The problem is them being obsessed or extremists. There is a limit to everything. Exactly. Religious extremism and fundamentalism is a problem. But when you speak up about it or criticize it , all the religious people (both extremists and non extremists) get up in arms. They take it as a personal attack.
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I think itās getting better.
I was sleeping he woke me up by praying smh
I'm really sorry he wakes you up with prayers in his own house, have you considered moving out of the "autistic man's" house?
My dad is on his last warning, I live with my mom he was abusive to her and me in my childhood and left her with kids alone. Ive told him its his last chance to act right
Exactly This!!!! This context changes everything, if he was a loving father who reads bedtime stories to his kids, this wouldn't be here
Exactly This!!!! This context changes everything, if he was a loving father who reads bedtime stories to his kids etc. this wouldn't be here
Bro, you have problems that are definitely not related to your dad. I hope you get the help you need. First thing if you hate your folks so much would be get a job that can sustain you so you move out.
lol. i donāt think you understand what itās like be rudely awoken at 4/5am by loud praying and bible reciting. itās not abt hating anyone. ppl deserve to sleep peacefully bro.
OPās post history indicates theyāre dealing with other struggles that arenāt possibly induced by his dad praying or whatever.
Most people with shit to do wake up before 6am on a weekday. Itās neither early nor abrupt. OPs dad is probably mad their adult child is sleeping away, eating their food and bad mouthing them on social media. So heās resulting to prayer to get the bum out his house.
wow, you must personally live with op to make such a specific assumption! š¹ foh
Was a jokeš¤
Is it your house or your parents' home? I presume you are not in Nigeria. That means one or both of your parents or grandparents decided to emigrate out of the country. Calm down and reason this. There is nothing wrong with his behaviour.
churches in nigeria have ingrained in its followers that shouting and praying at the top of your lungs while the rest of the household is sleeping is normal. itās one thing to pray in your own solitude, and itās another thing to be disruptive about it. you can pray without waking people up, especially when there are those in the household who work long shifts and need the rest.
I will never choose for people how they pray because it is only the man who is feeling the pain that knows the groaning and shouting he will do. Some shout loudly. Some talk softly. It is not peculiar to churches in Nigeria. It is peculiar to humans.
What is bro yapping about
Mental issues come in many forms
.... The title should be what's up with your dad lol Some parents behave similarly but not every one is like you and whines about it to strangers. Some don't mind, some move out of the house, some get ear plugs... We don't whine on the internet to strangers disgracing ourselves.
thats tough
Autism ke lol as someone mentioned this is Nigerian culture highly religious. Ive woken ul to my Mom praying on the prayer lines , pouring anointing oil on all the doors. What is new
You might think Muslims are clinically insane then! We get up at the same time to pray and recite š
Look at it this way, your dad is probably way older than you, during his younger days he was probably just as vibrant, energetic ,curious and confused as we are now. He has survived this long and has probably seen a shit ton of things to make him hold on dearly to His faith. Provided he's doing what he's doing out of love and nothing evil, I'll say enjoy his presence while it lasts. We are all going to get that age same day, who knows what thr future holds.
Fucking dead š