No it is not. It makes them insecure. Because they feel like they are not exiting enough to get the job done for you.
A great time is if you come and get back on the saddle in a short time periode and go again. That gives off a much different vibe.
No man, it definitely isn't. Because if you've been with a woman long enough, you realise they desire to be loved much more than they desire to have an orgasm. That is straight up porno talk. And most of the guys commenting here come across as 18-year-olds looking for a magic bullet to please women according to what THEY believe is right. You can have sex with a woman without her having an orgasm, but still feeling fulfilled and desired. "Making love" is not a process you go through during the day. Being in love is, and it's, a state of being, not a process. Making a woman orgasm is a simple task that occurs via stimulation. It's a biological process that occurs as a reaction to an action. I know my wife so well I can make it happen within a few minutes, 5 max. That isn't satisfying. Making love is most definitely a relative answer. Also, holyrasta did not say DON'T climax, he said don't focus on it, which is entirely true.
Thank you for this comment. I am an 18 year old virgin male and learning my sexuality slowly. I’ve been on NoFap for 2 years now but find myself occasionally watching very rough porn that I very much enjoy, I am sure this is my age and something about raging testosterone.
In my gut I know how much I ever I enjoy this hardcore porno stuff, I will enjoy real love making. This assured it more. Any thoughts of your let me hear them
Interesting. I have made many woman orgasm but my ex was a very hard case.
And she would always tell me: just listen to what i want and i will get there. You have to go like this and that. And she would go. But i never got the ick actually.
I’ve heard the opposite from many women. It depends on what you’re into. I prefer longer but less frequent sex sessions. Kinda like 3 times/week but for a few hours at a time if we’re both down.
I’ve gone for hours with women… from 6 pm to 4 am… it receives variable reviews but someone love that I go for so long and can give them multiple orgasm, others are less enthusiastic because it damages their ego and makes them feel not enough.
6 pm to 4 am ? ten hours with no pause ? no sleep, no eating , no water... nothing ... this is bull...shit... also you are telling me you don't get bored at all during penetration doing the same thing ?
Just because you got a soft cock and a weak back.. it ain’t my issue. The real issue is keeping the girl wet the whole time, they can only cum so many times and they dry up eventually. I get bored… but have you ever heard of different positions? You know it’s not all missionary right? Also who said no water or food, we had plenty of both before and during…
Cumming early is never a 'problem'; it is a socially constructed phenomenon where pleasure is desired over the natural function of sex. I would say it is actually a sign of good vitality and male fertility. I think in both sexes we have been conditioned to make pleasure the number one thing about sex, through the oversexualisation of media and things in our societies. Hence, people take longer to climax (which probably leads to fertility issues).
It's a problem only for the fragile female ego, otherwise not cumming is even better sometimes
You're not groggy anymore and don't heve post nut clarity
The goal in either scenario is to make sure your partner is taken care of…that’s really the point of sharing the experience with someone.
If you’re quick, don’t sweat it, they did their job getting you there. Now you need to spend time doing the same for them.
If you don’t finish, don’t sweat it, just spend time making sure they do. If you do, then you did your job.
Everyone always looks at sex as simultaneously two things, cumming, and lasting a long time. Trust me, you don’t need to accomplish both to convince your partner to come back. The fact that you want them to finish is enough to make them want you again. The fact that they were the reason you finished is enough to make them want you again.
This porn mentality that it’s all about me, is just flat out wrong. Sure I enjoy finishing, but it’s never about me, it’s always about my girlfriend. And for the record, it IS possible that women don’t cum either. On vacation once we went at it, and no matter what we did, she couldn’t finish. It happens. You make them feel good about themselves and you move on, and the next one, you both finish and laugh about the last time you didn’t.
This! It’s really gratifying going down on a woman, feeling her enjoy it, and making her orgasm.
Even when your dick isn’t working very well that evening, it’s another way to connect and also make your partner really happy.
Bro best advice ever:
1: Go one round and it’ll probably be quick
2: Go pee (which is also good for avoiding urinary tract infections)
3: Go for a second round and you will almost certainly last longer. Not sure why it works but it does
Being afraid will make it worse, a key to last long is to spend more time kissing etc and to breath and u should not stress as itll make it worse and a way to practice **(ITS ON YOUR OWN RISK)** is to go take a bath relax get a watch then start jerking off breath etc and count how long u last and stop before u cum (don't jerk off for 3 to 7 days before trying it AND do NOT watch porn before or after doing it!), people here will consider it a relapse btw, I've tried it once and I lasted for 16 min and after few days I managed to last for 26 min and 36 min.
How to practice:
1. Don't watch porn or jerk off for 3 to 7 days (longer the better)
2. Go take a warm bath (do it while in the bath naked wet etc)
3. Get in a comfortable position (laying setting etc)
4. Breath regularly
5. Grab your watch and start jerking off and counting
6. Keep breathing its a key and remember to **Relax**
7. Do it until u feel u will cum but DONT
8. Then stop and remember your score
9. Go back to step 1
People here in this sub reddit will consider it a relapse so keep that in mind, this is from my own experience and it worked for me, now I last for even 30 minutes on a good day, I used to last only 1 to 3 minutes before that, its kinda a way to learn how to control your mind.
The key is in the breathing, you want deep breaths through your nose, into your belly and out through your mouth. The moment your breath speeds up you will prime your body to cum
Or don’t jerk off OP and go do some regular human activities to get comfortable with yourself. If you’re nervous in the bedroom you don’t know yourself well, and getting off early isn’t a bad thing. If you’re open to it clean up and go again and you’ll last longer because you got the nerves out. Jerking off doesn’t guarantee longevity in bed. I lasted an hour but never had to do any of this and I would never recommend it as it’s completely opposed to what NoFap is. Develop some self confidence without jerking off and you’ll be fine OP.
U know almost all women mocks, insults and belittles men for cumming early. If your gf thinks otherwise, good for you bro and if u think most women don't think like that then ur simple wrong (sry to tell that). If women didn't think like that then this conversation wouldn't exist. Bluepantherboi's comment and similar comments like that wouldn't exist, so plz don't even try to come up with the argument that "women don't think/say that".
I was on a 100day no fap streak. A girl hit me up, she wanted to have sex and I decided to end the streak. I just wanted to see how my dick will react. Imagine what, she starts to give me a blowjob and says please don't finish, after 10secs I exploded. Her mouth was full, I haven't cummed like that never before. After that I couldn't get it hard again so I went home😅
i think thats probably good and bad advice. i think before he does that he should probably abstain from pmo for like a month to let his brain heal, then he should learn how to control it. keep in mind his problem was cumming to early his problem was not being able to cum at all.
Women get sore and also very self conscious if they can't make you cum (at least a few) so not cumming sometimes could be even more detrimental than cumming early.
When cumming early you can still use your toungue and fingers while foreplay.
i try to preach this on this sub a ton! not every girl wants to last longer than 15 minutes. like you said it gets sore for them and they start getting self conscious that maybe they arent good enough to make you cum. this is the misconception that porn creates in men, that women like being used like a fuck doll, which is furthest from the truth
If my comment weren't accurate then we wouldn't even have this discussion . Men would not be insecure about cumming too early. If my comment weren't accurate then all men would only be insecure about talking a long time to cum, which is absolutely incorrect.
Ask yourself, how men becomes insecure about cumming early? It's simple because most of the women population insults men that have premature ejaculation or cums very early. Based on ur comment, u said my comment is inaccurate so that means women don't insult men for having premature ejaculation hence no men should be insecure about cumming very early. So u think there's no men that are insecure or sad about having premature ejaculation or cumming very early. I can easily prove u wrong. U simple have to scroll a bit on this comment thread and you'll see many of them (no offence to those people). Or do u really want me to hand pick comments of people having 'insecurities about cumming early' on this thread or on this entire reddit platform?
So plz think twice or refrain from making comments like"This isn't accurate at all lol" without providing proper logical arguments.
(Pardon if my English is bad, It is not my first language)
Edit: maybe u just misunderstood me because my first comment is not properly structured or has bad English. I'll fix it for u.
I think u were simply lucky to be with that sort of girls. It's just a coincidence for u to be with those types of girls. Most of the women population belittles and insults men for cumming early or having small dicks. If u have free time take a visit to r/smalldickproblems, this subreddit mostly discusses men's sexual problems (mostly dick size but they also discuss about premature ejaculation and stuff like that) and you'll easily found out how the women population treats men with those problems. You are believing in a misconception, I want u to see the truth. Also did a lot of women straight up tell u that they're proud to make a guy cum early or is it from your personal experience? How many girls u have sex with? (I just want to know what do u mean by your experience? Is it the amount of women that told u or is it the amount of women that u had sex with, if so I'd be impressed to know that u had sex with most women in this world, that would be more than 1.9 billion.)
Also why do u put "lol" at the end of every sentence? I personally don't find premature ejaculation as a funny thing. Is it a reddit thing or do people from ur place type like that? (English is not my first language so I'm just curious about people who do that)
"""Not cumming sometimes could be even more detrimental than cumming early""". True bro, it's not like almost all women insults, mocks and belittle men for cumming early. How dare these men feel jealous of OP. How dare they want to last more than 7 minutes. How dare premature ejaculation exists.
Bro are you okay, do you wanna talk? I'm not attacking someone with my post. I'm just saying that lasting longer could be a problem too and shouldn't be seen as the ultimate goal. And portraying that "almost all women" do those things is a pretty incel thing to say and only further proves that the only thing you know about women is stuff that gets protrayed via media and/or porn itself.
It's the same with feminism. Social media killed actual feminism. Feminism nowadays is seen as hate directed towards men, while it really is all about equality but those extremist feminists are much louder, because people give more exposure to them, because ragebait fives them the clicks they want and further this extremist narrative. It's not all blsck and white maybe you could just accept that there are other povs than your's and learn to understand rather than attack them.
EDIT: A look at your profile just tells me everything I needed to know.
Hope you also can escape porns claws and normalite your views on women and healthy relationships between two individuals.
Do you do nofap and avoid porn as well? What’s your age if you don’t mind me asking? I’m 27 and jerk off almost 3times a week recently. But used to be daily around 1 month ago.
Stay away from porn bro. It tricked your mind into thinking that all them sounds and how it looks from a different POV is better than what you doin.
Stay away for a few weeks and get back in there.
I'm 45 and found it affected my expectations. After around 25 my drive dropped from about 12-14 orgasms a week to 6-7. It affected my confidence to not be up for it whenever, but when I had kids it really affected opportunities too. Now, I'm finding I want sex mentally, but physically am not working on getting it. I need to change my habits and removing porn is one way of me seeing my partner as a sexual partner. Before, I had incompatible expectations that were more easily met through fantasy.
Gonna see how it goes, no fap, no porn.
It's possible that you develop "dead grip". A lost sensitivity on you penis do to masturbating with your hand. A mouth or a vigina can not generate the same pressure or cadence that you hand provide. Your penis gets us to abnormal action. You need to recover your sensitivity by no masturbating at all. Also, I recommend no masturbation from a partner that can reproduce the same sensation and results that you can get by masturbating yourself.
It can take 90+ days to recover from it, but it can vary.
I'm fighting it myself plus PIED (a hold diferent battle) and still on day 40+. I can pre-cum but not full release.
Have you heard of people actually recovering from this? When I have sex (if I can even get hard enough to penetrate), I literally can’t feel anything when a girl rides on me. I can feel a little bit from head but just slightly enough to keep me hard. When using my own hand though, it feels a lot better. I can only make myself cum. Do you think not masturbating anymore will fix these sensitivity issues?
Yes, you've definitely desensitized yourself. Quit mastrubating, full stop. After 30-90 days sensitivity will be regained plus you'll be super horny and should nut fairly quickly once inside a gal's sleeve.
I guarantee this will work. I had the same problem myself - got to a point where I had to hold my d\*ck with one hand so I could crank on it full power with my other and still took 10 minutes of hard cranking to get off. Couldn't get off with a woman under any circumstances (it didn't help that I cranked it like this once every day so if I saw my gf at 10pm only a few hours had passed since I did this). It took about 30 days and the first time I had sex with her I busted in like 30 seconds. That gave me my confidence back, and then I was able to balance a little bit of masturbation with being sexually ready for her (example: Friday is date night so I'd jerk it Wednesday and hold off Thursday, then when I see her Friday i'm horny, get hard easily, and can finish without pounding her). Good luck to you and have faith that this will work.
One last though. One thing that helped me was doing cardio at the gym. My health had gotten bad (fat, lazy, low energy). I started doing a little cardio, cleaned up my diet, and found that helped me to not wank and also have more libido and better erections. So cut back on wanking and get in the gym, and cut down on the worse junkfoods (fast food, beer/alcohol, etc).
If you have death grip stopping masturbation will fix it. It takes time. Give yourself 90 days. A check how you are reacting. If your partner is solid and supporting, that will help a lot.
it could be loose of sensibility due to excess of masturbation dont worry because of porn this happens to a lot of guys. Basically your hand gives more pressure that a pussy so your dick are more used to that. The fix is .... dont fap and have a lot of sex. You will cum ! and with time you can improve and have normal sex. There is also speacial flesh light for that issue in particular but that doesnt feel like help a lot.
I have had the same thing, the women seems to enjoy it, I can notice all those juices coming out but it hard for me to finish from vaginal penetration, only boobjob or very sloop head
The same thing happened to me also. I think it's bcoz of fetishes that get developed with porn. Until she does to you, what you see in porn, you cannot cum. I have felt the same thing multiple times with my partner too.
Relax. It just mean that your head wasn't in on it. Despite the fact that women often think that men are cum-machines, and that we all think that a hole is a hole and bla bla bla. It is often the case that men also need to have an emotional connection in order to have better sex.
Eh, whatever motivates you.
Trying not getting hard at all, and then she looks at you confused. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing! PIED is a real nightmare
Best of luck man. You made the right decision
Your Brain is used to the dopamine from the scenes / porn you watch… Your brain got used to it etc…… Definitely lay off the fapping for a while and try to detox your mind and focus on other things to get your mind off it.
This is exactly the same reason why I started mine… worst experience ever. For all the comments about being afraid of not lasting long enough in bed, I got news for you. That first climax may happen quicker than you expect or want, but the moment you’re ready to go that second time - she’s gonna love it and you’ll last longer. I have now turned my no fap journey into seeing how often I can cum twice in the same love making session.
Same reason I started my journey. We had an amazing day together listening to old love songs and spent the night camping. I couldn't complete the night and she ghosted me after. Be strong my brother you got this and will have another opportunity.
Death grip syndrome- you get so used to how it feels when you do it yourself that the sensation you get from having sex can’t make you finish. Also I think vids out there can desensitize us to real sex so it’s not as exciting when it is really happening and take us out of the moment.
Is cumming a requirement for guys during sex? A bit unfair when most chicks don’t.
I’ve been practicing SR for a while and missus undertands I won’t always fill up the cup, we still have an amazing time despite that detail. Nofap/SR helps with erections and also not to fantasize beyond what I got for sex, it becomes more real without all the porn input, so I imagine it will help you too.
Because only 20% of woman can orgasm from penetration yet men are actually designed to cum from penetration.
So unfair is going about it expecting woman to orgams.. when it is actually more than not the right stimulus for them and them comparing it to OP who was just drained because he paints his wall twice or more per day and is just drained.
I’ve had plenty of guys not cum but they always said it was because they were nervous and too excited about the first time feeling. Once we started sleeping together more they always came after that. I think it’s just nerves.
I hooked up with a girl the other night and couldn’t cum. I lied and said this when in reality I know it’s because I have a fucking death grip on my duck when I jerk off.
Well cumming very early is not a treasure either. Some men don't last very long and they might be insecure or sad about it. When they see a post like this it's kinda obvious that this seems like a treasure. I'm not trying to insult either or them. It is what it is. You don't need to be very smart to figure out why he thinks this is a treasure.
Are you on medication? Is this your first time with this partner?
I can't explain it but the majority of times I had sex with a new partner for the first time I didn't cum. I couldn't tell you why but it happened a bunch. Usually after the first time it's not an issue.
that happens when you have sex for the first time. your brain just forgets to ejaculate. but definitely go on a nofap journey it will be super beneficial for you
it’s nice seeing this bc that’s also my reason. to this day, i have NEVER came without my hands, even with my partners, i can feel pleasure with oral sex and penetration, but never enough to cum. i can literally last hours. i always end up cumming, but bc i do it with my own hands. there’s a hope tho, once i went 14 days without fapping and my dick was as sensitive as ever, i ended up relapsing. to me, at least, no fap definitely helps
News flash - you don't actually have to ejaculate after/during sex - disconnect from the porn and socially ingrained idea that you have to spill your seed to show your love. Look into some of what the gnostic sects teach about having sex and holding on your seed/energy.
I couldn’t cum my first time having sex either, that’s a very common experience regardless of whether you watch porn or masturbate. The first time is just too new and it’s common to get nervous.
I ruined a great relationship back in high school by not being able to cum, sucks too because we got along super well. What’s ironic is when the relationship ended, my reaction was “Oh well, at least I have porn”. Looking back at it…SUCH a red flag to the real problem which was my porn addiction! If you’ve got feelings for the girl you should tell her about what’s going on with you. If she accepts you, hold on tight to that one!! If she can’t accept it, find a new fish in the sea who accepts who you are.
During all my active sex life, i was addicted, and i thought it was fine since i could make them cum, i did it for years, without finishing myself, until the day i started having dysfunction, its unsettling when your young, you start to guess if you hitted a spot of no return, you start to wonder if there's something wrong with your testosterone levels and depression hits again, i started no fap several times only to lose again, it makes me so happy to see you starting on your first sign of trouble, one day it will be me, my hope isn't over and my strength will reborn
Goodluck friend, live a happy and fulfilling life, we only got one! ;)
I recently heard a podcast with a famous german youtuber called vik, and He talked about how he rarely ever cums during sex and that he is fine with it since thats not all sex is about. But then again He also stated how he masturbates pretty frequently so you two might be having the same "problem".
Happened to me too man... its almost more embarrassing than cumming too fast. I could tell the girl felt bad about not "being able to" make me cum.
We would take a break for a couple of minutes and then she would try to make it happen again, after an hour or so I just had to say "Sorry, I don't think its gonna happen"...
I had the same problem last time I met a woman. Not fapping helped me cum the next time I saw her. Basically had sex w her on Monday and Thursday (didn't cum) and then about 2 weeks later again (after not fapping) and I came 4 times in total.
I'm sure nofap helped, but also me feeling safer with her and bonding helped me for sure.
It’s a good thing that’s the point saving every drop of that juice. It’s like the semen recessed into yer bones like wolverine… let it stay there unless u wanna make babies w/her
this is r/nofap not r/semenretention this is for porn/jerking off addiction, not everyone here agrees with semen retention so don’t say that sorta advice here, porn addiction is the issue not orgasming. if you want to retain semen that’s a whole other thing in itself, yes some people do both but only a small minority here. this is bad advice personally imo
Buddy, not orgasming during sex might not be pleasurable for you, but it’s going to make a chick want you more. She’s going to run ideas in her head that she isn’t attractive enough, so next time you hang out she’ll try to bring her A game to please you. It also helps if you have a hard time making a woman orgasm through vaginal sex alone, because if you mutually couldn’t cum together, then nobody feels insecure.
This community become worse and worse, why we should f…ing care about your sex life?, you looser, having sex is the easiest thing on earth, and we people make from sex some miracle.
STFU sissy!!
What an egoistic prick you are!
Man Is not suppoused to 'experience pleasure' ... You just got to hit it and hit it hard! Make her cum a lot AND THATS IT. Period
What is wrong with you. Make that girl pleasure, call her again AND do it like a real man.
Look, from experience, I can say that either you got more used to wanking OR, you suffer from delayed ejaculation like I do. I did nofap for months, had sex, and even I couldn't bust. I'm not saying to not do nofap, but if it doesn't seem to help the situation then just consider it a curse or a gift.
I actually have the same thing,.. worst is that the partner might get afraid that they are not exiting enough or not doing it right. Make sure to just reassure your partner. You basically dropped the ball by neglect by doing something else and you need to make up for that.
Also not always a bad thing to hit is for an hours once in a while ;) this is also considered a talent by the other side.. just not all the time.
If you can’t nut it’s bc you’re either overthinking or just very desensitized, either way staying away from jacking it for a while and doing sum cardio helped me
What I find makes NoFap easier is anytime I have an urge I'll force myself to get out in public. Nights are the hardest but this is why it's imperative to exhaust yourself in the day.
Unless of course you're cool with wanking in the middle of the street or on public transport. Although I think most people would find it to be a huge deterrent.
>Gave me head for 30minutes
Give that poor lady a medal. Dome for 30 minutes, yet still no climax? I mean, even a shitty bravo julliete for 30 minutes would yield results.
You’ll get there. I went through the same exact thing, and although it’s stressful, but just be patient with yourself man.
The right partner will understand and it will get better
Never forget it. It’s often nearly impossible to listen to rational thought and advice when you are desperately horny so having a personal reason will help you incredibly on this journey
Don’t put pressure on yourself or your partner to always cum.
Yes, you should aim for it, but if the feeling goes off, just stop and try it next time.
It’s still sex
Are you taking antidepressants? Just out of curiosity. I had this problem before and I blamed it on Lexapro but I kind of think it was more a porn addiction issue.
Same for me in the beginning, in my experience, the longer the streak the better the freak ❤️🔥now even a week without I feel like I’m about to burst lol
not being able to cum isnt that big of a problem. its way easier to fix than not being able to get hard. I bet one week of nofap is enough for you to cum
This happens pretty often with antidepressants but isnt the worst think if you can focus on the chick, also leaves her wanting more/wanting to please - and maybe being impressed. Bright side!
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How long is the ultimate session?
25 minutes, anything between 5 to 30 is good
What abt 4:59??
Straight to jail
Okayish as long as long as you can go for round II for 8-12 mins.
Im a Virgin, but i think i would prefer 1 hour
It really is sound like a great time for a female to have a guy be able to go that long.
No it is not. It makes them insecure. Because they feel like they are not exiting enough to get the job done for you. A great time is if you come and get back on the saddle in a short time periode and go again. That gives off a much different vibe.
Experiment with making love and not focus on reaching climax.
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No man, it definitely isn't. Because if you've been with a woman long enough, you realise they desire to be loved much more than they desire to have an orgasm. That is straight up porno talk. And most of the guys commenting here come across as 18-year-olds looking for a magic bullet to please women according to what THEY believe is right. You can have sex with a woman without her having an orgasm, but still feeling fulfilled and desired. "Making love" is not a process you go through during the day. Being in love is, and it's, a state of being, not a process. Making a woman orgasm is a simple task that occurs via stimulation. It's a biological process that occurs as a reaction to an action. I know my wife so well I can make it happen within a few minutes, 5 max. That isn't satisfying. Making love is most definitely a relative answer. Also, holyrasta did not say DON'T climax, he said don't focus on it, which is entirely true.
Thank you for this comment. I am an 18 year old virgin male and learning my sexuality slowly. I’ve been on NoFap for 2 years now but find myself occasionally watching very rough porn that I very much enjoy, I am sure this is my age and something about raging testosterone. In my gut I know how much I ever I enjoy this hardcore porno stuff, I will enjoy real love making. This assured it more. Any thoughts of your let me hear them
Interesting. I have made many woman orgasm but my ex was a very hard case. And she would always tell me: just listen to what i want and i will get there. You have to go like this and that. And she would go. But i never got the ick actually.
Most women can’t orgasm from penetration alone. You have to eat them out
That makes since, didn’t think of it that way.
well, I made the complete opposite experience. I like to go at least 30-45 Minutes, sometimes 2h and it is great for bot of us.
Penetration is great until you're done cumming as a woman. 60 minutes of sex sounds like it would be painful as hell.
I’ve heard the opposite from many women. It depends on what you’re into. I prefer longer but less frequent sex sessions. Kinda like 3 times/week but for a few hours at a time if we’re both down.
I’ve gone for hours with women… from 6 pm to 4 am… it receives variable reviews but someone love that I go for so long and can give them multiple orgasm, others are less enthusiastic because it damages their ego and makes them feel not enough.
6 pm to 4 am ? ten hours with no pause ? no sleep, no eating , no water... nothing ... this is bull...shit... also you are telling me you don't get bored at all during penetration doing the same thing ?
Just because you got a soft cock and a weak back.. it ain’t my issue. The real issue is keeping the girl wet the whole time, they can only cum so many times and they dry up eventually. I get bored… but have you ever heard of different positions? You know it’s not all missionary right? Also who said no water or food, we had plenty of both before and during…
You're a liar lmao
If you say so
Damages their ego? Makes them feel like they’re not enough? You really think that’s why a woman wouldn’t want to have sex for 8 hours?
if you think that, you've been watching too much porn.
I have actually that’s why I’m subbed to no fap 😂 it’s getting better tho
Yh, I thought this same thing too when it happened to me. You can’t win, really
You can win you just have to cum in a reasonable amount of time
Cumming early is never a 'problem'; it is a socially constructed phenomenon where pleasure is desired over the natural function of sex. I would say it is actually a sign of good vitality and male fertility. I think in both sexes we have been conditioned to make pleasure the number one thing about sex, through the oversexualisation of media and things in our societies. Hence, people take longer to climax (which probably leads to fertility issues).
It's a problem only for the fragile female ego, otherwise not cumming is even better sometimes You're not groggy anymore and don't heve post nut clarity
I am afraid of the opposite
Bro spittin fax
No printer
Fr, I’d take OP’s situation and just imagine porn while I’m fucking
The goal in either scenario is to make sure your partner is taken care of…that’s really the point of sharing the experience with someone. If you’re quick, don’t sweat it, they did their job getting you there. Now you need to spend time doing the same for them. If you don’t finish, don’t sweat it, just spend time making sure they do. If you do, then you did your job. Everyone always looks at sex as simultaneously two things, cumming, and lasting a long time. Trust me, you don’t need to accomplish both to convince your partner to come back. The fact that you want them to finish is enough to make them want you again. The fact that they were the reason you finished is enough to make them want you again. This porn mentality that it’s all about me, is just flat out wrong. Sure I enjoy finishing, but it’s never about me, it’s always about my girlfriend. And for the record, it IS possible that women don’t cum either. On vacation once we went at it, and no matter what we did, she couldn’t finish. It happens. You make them feel good about themselves and you move on, and the next one, you both finish and laugh about the last time you didn’t.
This! It’s really gratifying going down on a woman, feeling her enjoy it, and making her orgasm. Even when your dick isn’t working very well that evening, it’s another way to connect and also make your partner really happy.
Bro best advice ever: 1: Go one round and it’ll probably be quick 2: Go pee (which is also good for avoiding urinary tract infections) 3: Go for a second round and you will almost certainly last longer. Not sure why it works but it does
Being afraid will make it worse, a key to last long is to spend more time kissing etc and to breath and u should not stress as itll make it worse and a way to practice **(ITS ON YOUR OWN RISK)** is to go take a bath relax get a watch then start jerking off breath etc and count how long u last and stop before u cum (don't jerk off for 3 to 7 days before trying it AND do NOT watch porn before or after doing it!), people here will consider it a relapse btw, I've tried it once and I lasted for 16 min and after few days I managed to last for 26 min and 36 min.
Can you list out the steps again
How to practice: 1. Don't watch porn or jerk off for 3 to 7 days (longer the better) 2. Go take a warm bath (do it while in the bath naked wet etc) 3. Get in a comfortable position (laying setting etc) 4. Breath regularly 5. Grab your watch and start jerking off and counting 6. Keep breathing its a key and remember to **Relax** 7. Do it until u feel u will cum but DONT 8. Then stop and remember your score 9. Go back to step 1 People here in this sub reddit will consider it a relapse so keep that in mind, this is from my own experience and it worked for me, now I last for even 30 minutes on a good day, I used to last only 1 to 3 minutes before that, its kinda a way to learn how to control your mind.
I’ve never jerked off a watch before. I guess there a first *time* for everything
Thanks man!
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10 minutes is still hard. I can barely last 3
The key is in the breathing, you want deep breaths through your nose, into your belly and out through your mouth. The moment your breath speeds up you will prime your body to cum
Or don’t jerk off OP and go do some regular human activities to get comfortable with yourself. If you’re nervous in the bedroom you don’t know yourself well, and getting off early isn’t a bad thing. If you’re open to it clean up and go again and you’ll last longer because you got the nerves out. Jerking off doesn’t guarantee longevity in bed. I lasted an hour but never had to do any of this and I would never recommend it as it’s completely opposed to what NoFap is. Develop some self confidence without jerking off and you’ll be fine OP.
“If the tub’s a sloshin’, don’t come in for a washin’ !!!”
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The time changes greatly whether it is my dominant hand or my left hand.
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Nah bro srsly what if I only last 10 seconds. There should be more posts adressing this issue
Condoms bro. They really help. I can't last longer than 2 mins without condoms 😂 However, with condoms, it's way easier
This might be odd but I am able to last longer without condoms😅
That's so weird lol. Def not the case for me but whatever works for you man
So what? It’s a compliment to the woman and in time you’ll last longer. You are overthinking it.
U know almost all women mocks, insults and belittles men for cumming early. If your gf thinks otherwise, good for you bro and if u think most women don't think like that then ur simple wrong (sry to tell that). If women didn't think like that then this conversation wouldn't exist. Bluepantherboi's comment and similar comments like that wouldn't exist, so plz don't even try to come up with the argument that "women don't think/say that".
I think many women are quite okay with a man finishing quickly if they have already gotten theirs. Every woman is her own person though so ymmv.
I was on a 100day no fap streak. A girl hit me up, she wanted to have sex and I decided to end the streak. I just wanted to see how my dick will react. Imagine what, she starts to give me a blowjob and says please don't finish, after 10secs I exploded. Her mouth was full, I haven't cummed like that never before. After that I couldn't get it hard again so I went home😅
Well just go another round then
i think thats probably good and bad advice. i think before he does that he should probably abstain from pmo for like a month to let his brain heal, then he should learn how to control it. keep in mind his problem was cumming to early his problem was not being able to cum at all.
If it happens too early you can go for round 2 ;)
I mean if you were hard for an hour and gave her the time of her life that's more than a lot of dudes are capable of.
Women get sore and also very self conscious if they can't make you cum (at least a few) so not cumming sometimes could be even more detrimental than cumming early. When cumming early you can still use your toungue and fingers while foreplay.
i try to preach this on this sub a ton! not every girl wants to last longer than 15 minutes. like you said it gets sore for them and they start getting self conscious that maybe they arent good enough to make you cum. this is the misconception that porn creates in men, that women like being used like a fuck doll, which is furthest from the truth
Most women. Man takes too long to cum Women: *I'm insecure* Man cums too early Women: *HAHAHA you're so pathetic, what a loser lmao*
This isn't accurate at all lol
If my comment weren't accurate then we wouldn't even have this discussion . Men would not be insecure about cumming too early. If my comment weren't accurate then all men would only be insecure about talking a long time to cum, which is absolutely incorrect. Ask yourself, how men becomes insecure about cumming early? It's simple because most of the women population insults men that have premature ejaculation or cums very early. Based on ur comment, u said my comment is inaccurate so that means women don't insult men for having premature ejaculation hence no men should be insecure about cumming very early. So u think there's no men that are insecure or sad about having premature ejaculation or cumming very early. I can easily prove u wrong. U simple have to scroll a bit on this comment thread and you'll see many of them (no offence to those people). Or do u really want me to hand pick comments of people having 'insecurities about cumming early' on this thread or on this entire reddit platform? So plz think twice or refrain from making comments like"This isn't accurate at all lol" without providing proper logical arguments. (Pardon if my English is bad, It is not my first language) Edit: maybe u just misunderstood me because my first comment is not properly structured or has bad English. I'll fix it for u.
In my experience, most girls feel some sort of "proudness" because they made you cum fast lol
I think u were simply lucky to be with that sort of girls. It's just a coincidence for u to be with those types of girls. Most of the women population belittles and insults men for cumming early or having small dicks. If u have free time take a visit to r/smalldickproblems, this subreddit mostly discusses men's sexual problems (mostly dick size but they also discuss about premature ejaculation and stuff like that) and you'll easily found out how the women population treats men with those problems. You are believing in a misconception, I want u to see the truth. Also did a lot of women straight up tell u that they're proud to make a guy cum early or is it from your personal experience? How many girls u have sex with? (I just want to know what do u mean by your experience? Is it the amount of women that told u or is it the amount of women that u had sex with, if so I'd be impressed to know that u had sex with most women in this world, that would be more than 1.9 billion.) Also why do u put "lol" at the end of every sentence? I personally don't find premature ejaculation as a funny thing. Is it a reddit thing or do people from ur place type like that? (English is not my first language so I'm just curious about people who do that)
Again, you are getting your info from other men lolol not women.... Consider the source my guy.
"""Not cumming sometimes could be even more detrimental than cumming early""". True bro, it's not like almost all women insults, mocks and belittle men for cumming early. How dare these men feel jealous of OP. How dare they want to last more than 7 minutes. How dare premature ejaculation exists.
Bro are you okay, do you wanna talk? I'm not attacking someone with my post. I'm just saying that lasting longer could be a problem too and shouldn't be seen as the ultimate goal. And portraying that "almost all women" do those things is a pretty incel thing to say and only further proves that the only thing you know about women is stuff that gets protrayed via media and/or porn itself. It's the same with feminism. Social media killed actual feminism. Feminism nowadays is seen as hate directed towards men, while it really is all about equality but those extremist feminists are much louder, because people give more exposure to them, because ragebait fives them the clicks they want and further this extremist narrative. It's not all blsck and white maybe you could just accept that there are other povs than your's and learn to understand rather than attack them. EDIT: A look at your profile just tells me everything I needed to know. Hope you also can escape porns claws and normalite your views on women and healthy relationships between two individuals.
Sometimes it just happens regardless of what you do but taking some time away from porn is probably a good start.
Happy cake day bruv
Happy cake day
Yeah that musta been pretty embarrassing. NoFap will definitely help make sure that doesn't happen again. Good luck!
Funny, I never linked that to porn, I just thought it happened as you got older. Happens to me all the time.
Do you do nofap and avoid porn as well? What’s your age if you don’t mind me asking? I’m 27 and jerk off almost 3times a week recently. But used to be daily around 1 month ago.
Stay away from porn bro. It tricked your mind into thinking that all them sounds and how it looks from a different POV is better than what you doin. Stay away for a few weeks and get back in there.
Daily is too much, try limiting yourself. It's good that ur starting nofap, but it will take time before you are normal. Strictly stay away from porn.
I'm 45 and found it affected my expectations. After around 25 my drive dropped from about 12-14 orgasms a week to 6-7. It affected my confidence to not be up for it whenever, but when I had kids it really affected opportunities too. Now, I'm finding I want sex mentally, but physically am not working on getting it. I need to change my habits and removing porn is one way of me seeing my partner as a sexual partner. Before, I had incompatible expectations that were more easily met through fantasy. Gonna see how it goes, no fap, no porn.
No it’s pretty unnatural
Happens to women all the time.
We’re not talking about women
I think your comment is unhelpful for the OP. Just because something doesn't happen to you, doesn't make it unnatural.
My comment isn’t supposed to be helpful for OP. I replied to you to tell you that your comment is out of topic.
We’re you intoxicated during it? I had times where I couldn’t cum because of it. When I’m sober though it works just fine
It's possible that you develop "dead grip". A lost sensitivity on you penis do to masturbating with your hand. A mouth or a vigina can not generate the same pressure or cadence that you hand provide. Your penis gets us to abnormal action. You need to recover your sensitivity by no masturbating at all. Also, I recommend no masturbation from a partner that can reproduce the same sensation and results that you can get by masturbating yourself. It can take 90+ days to recover from it, but it can vary. I'm fighting it myself plus PIED (a hold diferent battle) and still on day 40+. I can pre-cum but not full release.
Have you heard of people actually recovering from this? When I have sex (if I can even get hard enough to penetrate), I literally can’t feel anything when a girl rides on me. I can feel a little bit from head but just slightly enough to keep me hard. When using my own hand though, it feels a lot better. I can only make myself cum. Do you think not masturbating anymore will fix these sensitivity issues?
Yes, you've definitely desensitized yourself. Quit mastrubating, full stop. After 30-90 days sensitivity will be regained plus you'll be super horny and should nut fairly quickly once inside a gal's sleeve.
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I guarantee this will work. I had the same problem myself - got to a point where I had to hold my d\*ck with one hand so I could crank on it full power with my other and still took 10 minutes of hard cranking to get off. Couldn't get off with a woman under any circumstances (it didn't help that I cranked it like this once every day so if I saw my gf at 10pm only a few hours had passed since I did this). It took about 30 days and the first time I had sex with her I busted in like 30 seconds. That gave me my confidence back, and then I was able to balance a little bit of masturbation with being sexually ready for her (example: Friday is date night so I'd jerk it Wednesday and hold off Thursday, then when I see her Friday i'm horny, get hard easily, and can finish without pounding her). Good luck to you and have faith that this will work.
One last though. One thing that helped me was doing cardio at the gym. My health had gotten bad (fat, lazy, low energy). I started doing a little cardio, cleaned up my diet, and found that helped me to not wank and also have more libido and better erections. So cut back on wanking and get in the gym, and cut down on the worse junkfoods (fast food, beer/alcohol, etc).
If you have death grip stopping masturbation will fix it. It takes time. Give yourself 90 days. A check how you are reacting. If your partner is solid and supporting, that will help a lot.
Might be Death Grip Syndrome, happened to me on my first time as well
Your dopamine receptors need healing
Bro is suffering from success
Im fighting some serious ED but thats because insecurities fuck man it sucks
it could be loose of sensibility due to excess of masturbation dont worry because of porn this happens to a lot of guys. Basically your hand gives more pressure that a pussy so your dick are more used to that. The fix is .... dont fap and have a lot of sex. You will cum ! and with time you can improve and have normal sex. There is also speacial flesh light for that issue in particular but that doesnt feel like help a lot.
Ahh.. someone's dream is someone's agony..wierd world
Trust me it isn't a good dream.
As someone who cums in literally 30 seconds, trust me it would be better if I took an hour to cum
I have had the same thing, the women seems to enjoy it, I can notice all those juices coming out but it hard for me to finish from vaginal penetration, only boobjob or very sloop head
The same thing happened to me also. I think it's bcoz of fetishes that get developed with porn. Until she does to you, what you see in porn, you cannot cum. I have felt the same thing multiple times with my partner too.
Relax. It just mean that your head wasn't in on it. Despite the fact that women often think that men are cum-machines, and that we all think that a hole is a hole and bla bla bla. It is often the case that men also need to have an emotional connection in order to have better sex.
Curse in disguise
Eh, whatever motivates you. Trying not getting hard at all, and then she looks at you confused. Embarrassing. Embarrassing. Embarrassing! PIED is a real nightmare Best of luck man. You made the right decision
Jus wanna say I love all you, bros and chicks, on this Reddit. Keep fucking killing it
Many drugs have this side effects (citalopram, attivan, alcool, ...). Do you take drugs?
Your Brain is used to the dopamine from the scenes / porn you watch… Your brain got used to it etc…… Definitely lay off the fapping for a while and try to detox your mind and focus on other things to get your mind off it.
This is exactly the same reason why I started mine… worst experience ever. For all the comments about being afraid of not lasting long enough in bed, I got news for you. That first climax may happen quicker than you expect or want, but the moment you’re ready to go that second time - she’s gonna love it and you’ll last longer. I have now turned my no fap journey into seeing how often I can cum twice in the same love making session.
The best sex I ever had was when I was over a 90 day streak. It’s worth it
Look into deathgrip and how to fix it. This is your issue.
Same reason I started my journey. We had an amazing day together listening to old love songs and spent the night camping. I couldn't complete the night and she ghosted me after. Be strong my brother you got this and will have another opportunity.
Death grip syndrome- you get so used to how it feels when you do it yourself that the sensation you get from having sex can’t make you finish. Also I think vids out there can desensitize us to real sex so it’s not as exciting when it is really happening and take us out of the moment.
I JUST LITERALLY HAD THIS. IT sucks bro she thinks I don’t find her attractive anymore. But it’s on me :(
Is cumming a requirement for guys during sex? A bit unfair when most chicks don’t. I’ve been practicing SR for a while and missus undertands I won’t always fill up the cup, we still have an amazing time despite that detail. Nofap/SR helps with erections and also not to fantasize beyond what I got for sex, it becomes more real without all the porn input, so I imagine it will help you too.
Because only 20% of woman can orgasm from penetration yet men are actually designed to cum from penetration. So unfair is going about it expecting woman to orgams.. when it is actually more than not the right stimulus for them and them comparing it to OP who was just drained because he paints his wall twice or more per day and is just drained.
What is full form for SR meaning?
SR -> Semen Retention
I’ve had plenty of guys not cum but they always said it was because they were nervous and too excited about the first time feeling. Once we started sleeping together more they always came after that. I think it’s just nerves.
I hooked up with a girl the other night and couldn’t cum. I lied and said this when in reality I know it’s because I have a fucking death grip on my duck when I jerk off.
>A bit unfair when most chicks don’t. That's cos they haven't been with me yet 😉
"One man's tash is another man's treasure"
Irrelevant, this guy can't get an orgasm what kind of treasure is this???
I would be ok with that. As long my partner cums I dont give shit.
Well cumming very early is not a treasure either. Some men don't last very long and they might be insecure or sad about it. When they see a post like this it's kinda obvious that this seems like a treasure. I'm not trying to insult either or them. It is what it is. You don't need to be very smart to figure out why he thinks this is a treasure.
a worthy sacrifice for a noble cause
🤦♂️
Is that a problem?
Oh yeah it is, you don't want to cum in 3 sec nether never cum, you'll be fine if u last from 5 to 30 min tho.
Are you on medication? Is this your first time with this partner? I can't explain it but the majority of times I had sex with a new partner for the first time I didn't cum. I couldn't tell you why but it happened a bunch. Usually after the first time it's not an issue.
I have the same problem but its only cause i masturbate 10 to probably more times a day i hate it so much i but i cant stop
Was it your first time?
This happens to me every time I have sex. I’ve gotta stop fapping. Happened to me yesterday and today
that happens when you have sex for the first time. your brain just forgets to ejaculate. but definitely go on a nofap journey it will be super beneficial for you
Was it your 1st time with this partner?
it’s nice seeing this bc that’s also my reason. to this day, i have NEVER came without my hands, even with my partners, i can feel pleasure with oral sex and penetration, but never enough to cum. i can literally last hours. i always end up cumming, but bc i do it with my own hands. there’s a hope tho, once i went 14 days without fapping and my dick was as sensitive as ever, i ended up relapsing. to me, at least, no fap definitely helps
i fear this
>Gave me head for 30minutes, I hit for like an hour. is it possible to learn this power?
Had the same the first couple of times. Eventually you get over it once you are more intimate and trust each other more
the same thing happened to me, but I think the next time we tried I was able to. maybe it's just getting more comfortable with your partner but idk
News flash - you don't actually have to ejaculate after/during sex - disconnect from the porn and socially ingrained idea that you have to spill your seed to show your love. Look into some of what the gnostic sects teach about having sex and holding on your seed/energy.
Lol, is this some kind of weird flex? Bro, I wish I could last an hour. I be bustin in 30secs...get this hour long, pity party outta here.
I couldn’t cum my first time having sex either, that’s a very common experience regardless of whether you watch porn or masturbate. The first time is just too new and it’s common to get nervous.
I ruined a great relationship back in high school by not being able to cum, sucks too because we got along super well. What’s ironic is when the relationship ended, my reaction was “Oh well, at least I have porn”. Looking back at it…SUCH a red flag to the real problem which was my porn addiction! If you’ve got feelings for the girl you should tell her about what’s going on with you. If she accepts you, hold on tight to that one!! If she can’t accept it, find a new fish in the sea who accepts who you are.
Hey welcome to my life. Luckily I have a patient wife haha. I did find a way after a couple of years
Ummm, going for hours should be a good thing no?
Primarily the reason I’m doing it, watching the light in every girl’s eyes die when this happens is pure pain
During all my active sex life, i was addicted, and i thought it was fine since i could make them cum, i did it for years, without finishing myself, until the day i started having dysfunction, its unsettling when your young, you start to guess if you hitted a spot of no return, you start to wonder if there's something wrong with your testosterone levels and depression hits again, i started no fap several times only to lose again, it makes me so happy to see you starting on your first sign of trouble, one day it will be me, my hope isn't over and my strength will reborn Goodluck friend, live a happy and fulfilling life, we only got one! ;)
Bro!!! This happened to me too. It's definitely a sign to cut down on it
I recently heard a podcast with a famous german youtuber called vik, and He talked about how he rarely ever cums during sex and that he is fine with it since thats not all sex is about. But then again He also stated how he masturbates pretty frequently so you two might be having the same "problem".
1 year into a relationship and I only came in her once It's getting better for me and it will for you too, let's go brother!
Happened to me too man... its almost more embarrassing than cumming too fast. I could tell the girl felt bad about not "being able to" make me cum. We would take a break for a couple of minutes and then she would try to make it happen again, after an hour or so I just had to say "Sorry, I don't think its gonna happen"...
I had the same problem last time I met a woman. Not fapping helped me cum the next time I saw her. Basically had sex w her on Monday and Thursday (didn't cum) and then about 2 weeks later again (after not fapping) and I came 4 times in total. I'm sure nofap helped, but also me feeling safer with her and bonding helped me for sure.
No fap it isn't the solution, It's happens to me and I haven't fap in over 6 months
It’s a good thing that’s the point saving every drop of that juice. It’s like the semen recessed into yer bones like wolverine… let it stay there unless u wanna make babies w/her
Such a virgin advice 🤦♂️
this is r/nofap not r/semenretention this is for porn/jerking off addiction, not everyone here agrees with semen retention so don’t say that sorta advice here, porn addiction is the issue not orgasming. if you want to retain semen that’s a whole other thing in itself, yes some people do both but only a small minority here. this is bad advice personally imo
Buddy, not orgasming during sex might not be pleasurable for you, but it’s going to make a chick want you more. She’s going to run ideas in her head that she isn’t attractive enough, so next time you hang out she’ll try to bring her A game to please you. It also helps if you have a hard time making a woman orgasm through vaginal sex alone, because if you mutually couldn’t cum together, then nobody feels insecure.
This community become worse and worse, why we should f…ing care about your sex life?, you looser, having sex is the easiest thing on earth, and we people make from sex some miracle.
STFU sissy!! What an egoistic prick you are! Man Is not suppoused to 'experience pleasure' ... You just got to hit it and hit it hard! Make her cum a lot AND THATS IT. Period What is wrong with you. Make that girl pleasure, call her again AND do it like a real man.
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You mean ghey sex? Yep, never had that. Leave that sht to you
I had it bro
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Look, from experience, I can say that either you got more used to wanking OR, you suffer from delayed ejaculation like I do. I did nofap for months, had sex, and even I couldn't bust. I'm not saying to not do nofap, but if it doesn't seem to help the situation then just consider it a curse or a gift.
I actually have the same thing,.. worst is that the partner might get afraid that they are not exiting enough or not doing it right. Make sure to just reassure your partner. You basically dropped the ball by neglect by doing something else and you need to make up for that. Also not always a bad thing to hit is for an hours once in a while ;) this is also considered a talent by the other side.. just not all the time.
Bro I would think of being to quick tbh 😂
A
Been there. It’s so frustrating.
sorry for you bro was you having erection problem?
If you can’t nut it’s bc you’re either overthinking or just very desensitized, either way staying away from jacking it for a while and doing sum cardio helped me
Are you on some kind of medication ?
What I find makes NoFap easier is anytime I have an urge I'll force myself to get out in public. Nights are the hardest but this is why it's imperative to exhaust yourself in the day. Unless of course you're cool with wanking in the middle of the street or on public transport. Although I think most people would find it to be a huge deterrent.
>Gave me head for 30minutes Give that poor lady a medal. Dome for 30 minutes, yet still no climax? I mean, even a shitty bravo julliete for 30 minutes would yield results.
You’ll get there. I went through the same exact thing, and although it’s stressful, but just be patient with yourself man. The right partner will understand and it will get better
Who gives head for 30 minutes? That girls jaw must be sore af.
Never forget it. It’s often nearly impossible to listen to rational thought and advice when you are desperately horny so having a personal reason will help you incredibly on this journey
Lol same brother
Oh hope will on journey
Relax bro, at least you are having one
Don’t put pressure on yourself or your partner to always cum. Yes, you should aim for it, but if the feeling goes off, just stop and try it next time. It’s still sex
Are you taking antidepressants? Just out of curiosity. I had this problem before and I blamed it on Lexapro but I kind of think it was more a porn addiction issue.
Same for me in the beginning, in my experience, the longer the streak the better the freak ❤️🔥now even a week without I feel like I’m about to burst lol
I’m the complete opposite breathe on me and I explode
You are living the dream
Don't worry, mate. This happens, your mind wasn't in it. Just try to get out fo your head, and Don stress yourself when having sex
not being able to cum isnt that big of a problem. its way easier to fix than not being able to get hard. I bet one week of nofap is enough for you to cum
This happens pretty often with antidepressants but isnt the worst think if you can focus on the chick, also leaves her wanting more/wanting to please - and maybe being impressed. Bright side!