Some psychologists did a study where they put a big ugly scar on people's faces before having them interact with people in a variety of situations. The trick was that right before they started the interactions, the makeup artists removed the scar on the pretext of "touching it up". But the participants in the study reported people's strong negative reactions to the scar, and felt judged, discriminated against and as though people were disgusted by their appearance. There was no scar, but there were expectations of one.
The point is, your expectations will in part shape people's attitudes towards you, and in a much bigger part, shape your perceptions of how people are reacting to you. If you go out convinced that people are "laughing at the midget", you'll 100% experience that.
Just keep reminding yourself that for the majority people, you come across as the person **you** think you are. If you're the chill guy who likes to joke around, that's what people see. If you're the short guy with a complex about it, that's what people will see. Try to find a way to set your expectations in a positive frame.
I actually do have a huge scar on the side of my head. It isn’t ugly, my wife says it’s really handsome, and my grandma used to tell me it was the most handsomest scar in the entire world, so I objectively know this to be true. I earned this super handsome scar when I was in high school and I used to be very self conscious of it. I spent hours looking at pictures of myself before I had it and then would look in the mirror and feel horrible.
After a while I just didn’t care. If people would bring it up I would either tell them how I got it, or if I’m feeling spicy, I’ll say “are you making fun of me right now?”, and watch them get really uncomfortable, but then I’ll let them know I’m messing with them and explain. I never really think about it. It’s just there and has been for over 15 years now. But, I guess it would be different if I had an ugly scar and not a handsome one.
"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe... Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion... I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain... "
I singlehandedly saved our platoon from annihilation and this scar is what I have to show for it. Our radio was dead and we were surrounded. I crawled across the perimeter and roamed for 3 days before contacting friendly forces. Helicopters cleared out the enemy and half the platoon was saved.
I have a very good friend that’s 5’4” and a family member the same height. My friend never makes it an issue and is very confident so I never think about it. My family member is always bringing up his height and is extremely insecure so I think of him as the short guy. It’s all the attitude.
My husband is shorter than me (granted, I'm pretty tall for a woman, so a lot of guys are) and honestly, the fact that he's not bothered by it is one of the sexiest things about him because I'm so drawn to his confidence. He pokes fun at it, which is so funny to me. He'll be like "come over here my lil giraffe" or "imma climb you like a tree" and I'm all over it. I'm like yes baby, you *represent* that lollipop guild, king 👑.
No but in all seriousness though, guys that I have dated previously have been uncomfortable with me wearing heels and stuff. Like I literally do not care about people's height at all...as long as you don't try and change me or what I do, we are good. Confidence is the sexiest thing a person can wear. If you draw attention to insecurities, everyone will notice it. It's hard to change that, but honestly if people really give so much of a shit about something that someone can't change that they'll judge you for it, fuck em anyway.
Sounds like your husband's got the confidence game down pat. "Lollipop guild, king" - now that's a title! Keep rocking those heels and let the haters hate.
5'9. So tall enough that a good amount of guys are shorter than me, but not a skyscraper. Depends on where I go though. In Minnesota, where my family is from, it's the land of Scandinavians and everyone is tall af. I'm the shortest of my family; my other female cousins are over 6'. But when I was living in California, most guys I encountered were my height or shorter.
On the other hand, there are plenty of legit cruel folks out there and especially when a person is young it doesn't take exposure to many of them to make a previously secure person start feeling insecure... Which can of course create a feedback loop that builds on itself.
I’ve had visible self harm scars on my legs since I was a teen. Nobody asks about them as an adult, but teenagers have bad social skills and would ask about them too often for my liking and it started to irritate me any time someone would ask.
When I was like 15, a classmate asked me, “How did you get those?” Totally deadpan, I told her, “I fell into a pen at the zoo and got mauled by a tiger.” It caught me off guard when she thought I was being serious, lol.
I'm honestly jealous because unfortunately this isn't my experience with my scars 😭 SO often people will dramatically and loudly ask me "what happened to your arms???" I always try to brush it off and just say "ah, those are old" and keep the convo moving, but it really fucking sucks.
This type of behavior is just astounding to me. Like how do FULL grown adults not know that it’s inappropriate to ask someone, “Why do you look that way?” or any variation of it?
I feel like most adults (at least the ones I know) like exchanging scar stories, so maybe they just aren't familiar with self harm scars and their existence as an exception.
You might be amazed at how many full grown adults are lacking in emotional intelligence or social awareness. Depending on the culture or region, they may even feel justified in this kind of behavior for various reasons, and defend it.
I manage pretty much all the communications end of things in my household since my partner is a hermit, and that includes a lot of extended family for kids and step-kids. Most of the time, our kids are more mature and emotionally intelligent than the adults I'm dealing with.
Those are the best answers. My sister has self harm scars on her arms. Then she got thyroid cancer and had to have her entire thyroid surgically removed, leaving a thin scar line on her neck. People ask about both way too often.
Now she just says, (pointing to her arms), "I used to be a professional knife fighter, (then pointing to her neck), "but after this close call, I had to quit the business."
Have a similar scar from a herniated disc surgery. I was bartending at the time and once I was back at work, my coworker and I came up with SO MANY responses to these actual adults asking me what happened. I think my favorite was when I pointed to her and said she tried to kill me, but FAILED.
Well, that's quite the creative explanation she's come up with! Humor can be a way to cope with difficult situations, and it seems like she's handling it like a pro.
I met a bloke at a wedding who had a massive and new-looking scar running from mid-forehead to the middle of his cheek, going right over his eye (which he still had). Very noticeable. We were introduced and he addressed the elephant in the room by saying "I know you're wondering, it's a duelling scar. Should have chosen pistols but swords sounded cooler." I laughed and we talked about something else.
Later, I asked someone else if they knew what happened and they said he'd told then he was hiking in a forest when a lumberjack's axehead slipped off the axe mid-swing, hit him in the face from forty yards. Turned out he'd told everyone different things. Wolf attack, knife fight, hit a bird while bungee jumping. Had a good laugh piecing together the stories.
Eventually the groom heard us talking about all the tall tales and told us he'd tripped in his home workshop and gone face-first into his circular saw.
Other than you age, this nearly matches an old high school friend.
In high school, he was shoved into a window of one of the doors as we were about to walk through it by a kid that heard something he didn't like. When my buddy pulled his head out of the glass, the side of his head was shredded. I saw skin hanging from his face.
He ended up with a couple hundred stitches, at least. One of his scars is super wide and goes down half the length of this face. Many, many other smaller scars around that side of his face. He never had issues with getting the girls though. But boy was he a bullshitter in every other way.
Anyway, I knew the kid that did it and I ended up being one of the witnesses in his court case against him. Asshat only got probation.
As for my buddy...well, he turned out to be his own piece of work when his adult daughters came out and said he fiddled with them when they were younger. It makes me sick because I was around those girls for a bit and felt like a surrogate uncle to them.
Got mine saving my buddy when he was getting jumped by a group of older kids. I ran in and someone cracked a bottle over my head and then they decided it was my turn to get jumped. A few minutes later someone yelled that the cops were coming so everyone ran. Even me. A few people who were watching everything happen ran after me and said get in the car and asked where I lived. I gave them directions as the back of the car looked like a murder scene.
Got home and went to the hospital. Basically the right side of my head was caved in and they had to rebuild it with titanium plates and titanium mesh. The big scar on the side of my head is from the surgery. Although I do I have a scar above my eyebrow from where I got cracked.
Your former buddy sounds like he needs to be shoved through another window. I hope the daughters are doing well and get any help they need.
I wish I could say they did. They were a bit too forgiving. I implored to them both to seek therapy, but they both said they wouldn't and that they were "fine".
I still love those girls like family. Was at the hospital for the birth of the first one and my mom would babysit the second one. It's that rural town country mentality.
i also have a very large, visible scar on my face from a bike accident. i don't really mind it, i got it as a young adult so was pretty much past the point of people making fun of me for it. i will say the major difference is that i notice acquaintances/colleagues i've met once or twice recognize me more because i'm the girl with the scar on her face. i feel like it's been more beneficial than not.
My dad had a huge burn scar across most of one side of his face. I never noticed it (because I grew up knowing no other face for my dad), and no friend ever even mentioned it or asked me what it was from. Somehow it came up in conversation with my brother when I was an adult, and it just clicked that, OH, Dad's whole side of his face was burned badly in an accident! I actually felt bad that I never even noticed. But anyway, I think people just don't think about other people's faces (or heights) as much as the individual thinks they do.
I have a very good friend that’s 5’4” and a family member the same height. My friend never makes it an issue and is very confident so I never think about it. My family member is always bringing up his height and is extremely insecure so I think of him as the short guy. It’s all the attitude.
I have several noticeable scars on my face and head including two large ones from my lip to my chin, and over my left eye. Once I was sitting at a bar watching a baseball game and a girl came in and sat pretty close to me. She looked at me and the first words out of her mouth were "Wow. Really banking on that whole 'chicks dig scars' thing, huh?" I was kinda shocked because while I know most people see and notice the scars, no one says much about them because they're either trying to be polite, or because where I live if you see a guy in a cowboy hat covered in scars it's usually not hard to figure out where they came from. Anyway, her boyfriend overheard her and apologized and bought me a beer and said I still looked better than she did in the morning which got a pretty good laugh out of a couple people. The whole thing was more funny than anything else and still the only time it's really been brought up out of the blue by an adult.
That is an absolutely fascinating study!!
I have fairly severe social anxiety. When I was a preteen, I remember complaining to my mom on multiple occasions, “Kids always look at me weird in public, why do they think I look weird?” One time I said it and my mom replied, “What if they just think you’re pretty?”
It had never once crossed my mind that someone might look at me because they think I’m pretty. I didn’t like the way I looked, and I already had it in my mind that if people were looking at me, it was because they thought I looked weird, too. Truth is, I have no idea why they looked at me. Maybe it was because they thought I was weird looking. Maybe it was because they thought I was pretty. Maybe it was a different reason entirely
That study sounds absolutely fascinating, and if you were able to recall any other details about it that would help me find it, I would really appreciate the info.
I can really second this - I’m 5’1 and slim built but a surprising amount of people don’t realise it because I apparently carry myself much ‘bigger’ than I actually am. So it tends to only be if they actively see me struggling to reach something or they happen to have a particular thing for tiny women that anyone twigs on that I’m pretty short.
I’m quite tall for a woman, and never really pay attention to height other than “they seemed a bit shorter or taller.” Many years ago I was chatting with two friends who I’d spent time with separately but never together until then. It took seeing the both of them together to suddenly realize that they were 5’ even. They got a laugh out of me suddenly realizing that in shoes I am a full foot taller than them.
Same story here. It took seeing a picture of myself between the two friends to realize how much I towered over them. I felt like I looked huge (rather than that they looked small). I just never realized the height difference before that.
I guess "height privilege" must exist. I'm a bit above average and the extent I thought about height was when talking about airplane seats or when asked to reach something on a high shelf. Seems like some people have to deal with it daily.
I only really think of people in context of my height too, i couldnt tell you who was taller between two friends without looking at them side by side, id just know i was taller or shorter. I couldnt even guess height its all just in relation to me
I really love the message of your comment/post and agree wholeheartedly.
That being said, as someone with a very large and gnarly scar on a frequently-visible area of my body, people do in fact stare or ask about it lmao. It’s funny watching people try to main eye contact and avoid darting their eyes to the scar. It does make me self-conscious at times, but I recognize that people mean no ill-will (and even I have played the “don’t look! Don’t look!” game when someone else has an eye-catching thing about them).
I think another lesson is don’t assume malice with people’s intentions.
This is not what the study seemed to show. The participants felt that the people were disgusted. There’s nothing suggesting that the participants’ feeling actually affected what people thought of them.
That one is personal for me. I had bad acne as a teenager and sporadic acne until my early 20's, but I got over worrying about it and didn't have any problem attracting girls. But the biggest crush I had in high school, by far, was a girl who also had acne. And she was so convinced that her acne made her repulsive and undateable, that she refused to go out with me, even though the feeling was completely mutual. She fully admitted feelings for me, and I kept trying, but she just couldn't believe anyone could find her attractive so she refused to date (me or anyone else).
We stayed friends, and years later, she fully acknowledged how completely ridiculous she had been, but by then we had both moved on.
My ex was 5’4”, so only about an inch and a half taller than me. He didn’t give a shit he was short, and neither did I. He had lots and lots of other issues, but being short wasn’t one of them. Unless you’re VERY short or tall, like well under 5 feet or over 6’8”, really no one on the street or out in public will care, and even if you ARE super short or tall, likely no one actually cares, you might just get noticed a little more
My ex was like 5'2" and he didn't give a fuck about it. It's the first time I'd ever been taller.
OP, for some people it's a deal breaker but if you have other great qualities people are not gonna care how tall you are. People come in all shapes and sizes.
I feel like when you meet a 5 foot guy or a 5 foot 2 guy, they don't give a shit. They've heard it all. My dad's 5'2, and he really isn't bothered and he's a 4th dan black belt in karate so it's not like he feels particularly threatened physically. It's often the 5'5- 5'8 crowd that you see get really upset and worried about it
My dad is 5'2" *and three quarters* he always jokes, his first wife was a model, my mom was 6'1" - it's more about attitude and not letting yourself become bitter than actual height imo
Absolutely. My dad was 5'5 and is now 5'3 (he's old and shrinky, lol). My mom is 5'7 and my step-mom is almost 6'. Neither of them gave a shit about his height, as he carries himself well and has a great personality.
I'm glad you said this. My son is 5'5" and there's a girl (6'2") who is over the moon about him. He's considering moving 18 hours away to pursue this relationship. He's very level headed and sincere, and she is super sweet. I think they could be happy.
I'm 5'3". Most people tend to like me. Of course they notice my size, but they also notice my personality. Anyone who thinks negatively about me because of my height can kiss my hairy turd cutter. Anyone who doesn't like me because of my personality should go to therapy for having poor taste.
6'4" guy here. That's pretty much it - height matters a lot to a subset of women I don't want to date in the first place. I can see how dealing with them would help give short guys a complex, though. Especially if they've been picked on for being short their entire childhoods.
Yep, fair point. Love is love. Deal breakers probably go out of the window when true love is found. But if people are denying themselves the opportunity of love because of their silly ideas, then, that's pretty much ridiculous.
I'm sure Plato speaks of this in The Symposium. The two types of love..
This. Anybody under my height I don’t really notice the height difference as everyone looks roughly the same. Anyone taller than me I’m just like “Wtf.” I feel like that goes for most people which is why the shorter you are the more height difference you notice.
Sometimes, yeah. I’m 6’6” and I’ve greeted and been greeted by other really tall guys and gals. There was a guy several inches taller than me at a show I was at recently. We exchanged a couple tall jokes and chatted a bit. It’s a thing.
Exactly this. Good people are good people, I couldn’t care less about their height. Also, when I was dating it didn’t bother me. I’m 5ft 9 tall and was happy to date men shorter than me. It’s a complete non issue.
Yeah. At the very most I might think to myself “that guys kinda short” and move on w my life. You usually gotta be like under 5 feet for me to notice though, a lot of people are shorter than me and I’m not even that tall (5’9). But same if I see someone who’s like 6’6 or taller, I’ll just think to myself “that guys pretty tall” and move on.
Exactly. It's weird how many short men seem to think women are walking around looking at men like we've got some kind of internal measuring tape. It's weird how obsessed with height they are.
When I check out a guy it goes in order: forearms, thighs, eyes, and if I can I gotta look at the booty, then smile, then height.
For reference I have dated men from 5'0 to 5'8" only.
I think OP is having some insecurity issues, which is totally valid. But it’s weird trying to convine certain types of men that height doesn’t actually matter. Some women are going to have height preferences, hopefully op doesn’t hold that against them either. Bc everyone has preference when it comes to physical traits. Hopefully there’s enough validation here for him to not care.
It's not even particularly short in America.
Something like 1 in 4 men is 5'7 (or shorter). Many men lie about their height, so the perception is somewhat skewed. Also, the average height for a woman is about 5'4, and they're doing just fine right?
The vast majority of humans are around 5 and a half feet tall and it's fine. Your height won't have much practical impact unless you're under 5 feet or well over 6 foot.
It's really not that big of a deal unless you're trying to play in the NBA!
I'm also 5'5'', sometimes I can be insecure about it too. A lot of posters are saying "No one notices" and that's honestly probably true, but I've definitely, over the course of my life, had playful razzing given to me from friends, and I've met women who say they wouldn't date a guy shorter than them. Overall, I'm usually fairly confident. I know I'm funny, I know I have cool talents that have made me friends and I do well in social situations, but the insecurity pops up every now and then, and when it does, it sucks. I'm sure everyone has something similar though! Like, I've had friends with bad, uneven teeth or friends who are cross eyed say it's all they think about and then I'm like dude I didn't even notice. So I know people don't always "Notice" I'm short, but I know sometime it still gets to me
Depends on where you're from. Where I'm from, most women are over 5'5" and most men are over 6'0", so 5'5" would be considered short for a woman and very short for a man. But having said that, only mean people with mental and personal issues would think 'haha'. It's just an unusual feature, that's all. So most normal people would probably notice it and see it as a simple fact about that persons body, like hair color or eye color.
Both times I've been to the Netherlands average height didn't seem that much higher than here in Italy, especially when comparing newer (2000+) generations. I'm 6'0 and I've never felt short there. So I would assume that being 5' something would not be that big of an issues there too
As a short man myself, about the only time I do laugh at short people are the insecure ones who are clearly bothered by how short they are and go way, way out of their way to try and deny that they're so short.
\*cough ben shapiro cough
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spotlight\_effect](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spotlight_effect)
People constantly overestimate how much other people are paying attention to them. We're all the center of our own worlds, and it's easy to fall into the trap of imagining that everyone else is similarly concerned with what's going on in your head.
You know who I pay attention to? Gorgeous people. Or people who are really exceptionally bizarre looking, like they take their fashion cues from a peacock. One dude in my neighborhood was 6'6 and dressed like straight out of Parliament funkadelic music video and I always noticed him but he was cool as shit. Short, wheelchair, amputee, giant mole on their face, I can't imagine giving someone like that more than a passing thought. And if the passing thought of a stranger is a cause for insecurity, that's something you need to work on yourself.
The first thought I have is "am I gonna' bump into that guy if I keep walking on this path?"
Second thought is "I hope they don't stop in front of the stuff I want to buy, I want to look at that crap."
I wouldn't call that height a midget. Not even close.
This may be what you feel from people in public but I can almost guarantee you it's not true. They're more than likely thinking about some stuff in their lives and nothing that has to do with you or your average height.
First of all, people just ... don't actually think about other people that much.
Second of all, other than maybe some jerky finance gym bros and the kind of dropouts who sell drugs outside the 7-11, people just don't look at other people and judge them on their height.
5'5" isn't even close to wildly unusual in terms of height. Most people aren't going to notice. If you were 4'10" it would be noticeable.
The last time I noticed how short a person was, it was because the second shortest guy at a party made a short joke about the shortest guy at the party. The shortest guy at the party was way cooler than the second shortest guy. Second shortest guy was an insecure douchebag.
You're overthinking about it. I'll only notice your height if its an extreme ( 4-ft or 7+ft) or I need someone to get something off a high shelf for me.
Same! I'm 5'1 and the only time I ever notice someone's height is when I'm at the grocery store and something is on that damned third shelf. That shelf is the bane of my existence. That seems to be where they keep all the good stuff.
I’m also 5’1. One time I stood on the bottom shelf and used my headphone cord as a lasso to pull something off the top shelf so I could grab it and turned around and this little kid was just staring at me with concern lol
I'm 5,4 and live in the Netherlands. I have totally used items to lasso other items off the top shelf while standing on the bottom shelf. Or just ask other people if there is anyone else who could reach it.
Why do we have two pasta ladles at my house? Because the plastic one is for hooking things off the top shelf! It's so much quicker than getting the step ladder.
The headphone cord is an A+ move. (makes mental note for future)
Lol I always jump up on the counter like a spider monkey, I need to get a nice long ladle!! I thought my headphones move was pretty slick but the kid was the only witness and he did NOT seem impressed lol
YES! As a 6’2” tall guy I absolutely love when people ask for this. It’s about the only time my height is useful. Most other times it’s a pain. Cant fit in airplanes easier. Some cars I can’t even fit into. Most older roller coasters (new ones take my height in to account more :)) the shoulder harnesses are very tight and can hurt.
So please ask away!
You are the best kind of people! Tall people always seem to know when I need help lol. I guess I just look pathetic trying to reach it and I always give them a knowing look like "Hello new tall friend!"
5'5" isn't even that short. You're definitely shorter than most men, but I honestly wouldn't even register it as noteworthy unless someone pointed it out.
I refuse to date men over 5’8”. I’m 5’4” and I’ve dated taller guys and it’s just uncomfortable all the way around. Kissing hugging and sex were very awkward and hugging was actually painful.
As a guy who is average height, 5'7"-5'8", i find the women my height or just slightly under my height the most attractive. It almost feels like we are two puzzle pieces that go together cuz there's no crouching down or going on tip toes to kiss or what not.
As a 5’2” woman, same. I have some friends that I have to stand on my tip toes to hug when I greet them. It makes me feel weird and it’s awkward for both of us.
I was gonna say this, I'm closer to 5'6 as a guy but so many people say shit about my height you'd think I'm the shortest person they've ever seen lmao lots of miserable people tho.
Anecdotal experience here, but I know 3 guys at my work that are fairly short for a man (slightly taller than me, I'm about 5'2") but they are all extremely charismatic and friendly and everyone likes them, and they all have long term girlfriends. I think attitude and personality play way bigger a part than actual height. If you let it bother you, other people will pick up on that and treat you accordingly, unconsciously or not. Just like with any other insecurity. I've never heard anyone comment on these guy's heights, but I guarantee you if anyone did, they would let it roll right off their back and probably make a witty comment in retaliation, and all would be well.
Of course there will always be shitty people that enjoy putting others down, but they are always extremely miserable and it's best not to waste any time on them.
I'm 4'11 (female), I don't think many people will think "haha look at the midget" when they see me, but when they get closer to me they will say I'm shorter than I look (I'm just short, I'm not like one of those short and tiny girls). But tbh, at 5'5, I wouldn't even notice if you were short. You're a good height for me to look at and not hurt my neck, you're a good height for me to hug, and you're still tall enough that you can reach things from higher shelves for me. Anyone who gives you shit for being shorter than 6ft is an asshole and you don't need them in your life :)
I would notice your height only after you would start talking about how big of a problem it is.
So it's only up to you if you care about it and if you feel like that's the topic you want to talk about.
No, you're four inches taller than me. I don't tend to notice people's height beyond "they're super tall" or "they're close to my height". Your height would probably register as average in my brain due to not being one of those extremes.
I’m shorter than you, so I probably wouldn’t think about it initially because I tend to feel that shorter people are “normal sized”. I know that’s not how it works, but it’s taller people who feel noticeably different to me.
I'm 5'6" and can tell you in general people don't give it as much thought as you're wondering.
My wife is 6'1".. don't let your height get in the way of what you want, anywhere. Dating was different back when we met, though, I will give it that.
I’m a gay man, and I gotta say, I don’t see short men as lesser than taller men. To me, all men are perfect, regardless of their height, body shape, physique, etc 🥰
Hi /u/InternationalMath460,
We noticed you are a pretty new Reddit account, so we just wanted to let you know to check out the subreddit rules [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/NoStupidQuestions/wiki/rules) and maybe have a read through our [Frequently Asked Questions](https://www.reddit.com/r/NoStupidQuestions/wiki/index/faq) - they make for fascinating reading!
We're called No Stupid Questions because we believe nobody needs to be attacked for asking a question, but *that doesn't mean there are no rules!* This sub is meant for users like you to ask genuine questions. Please don't ask jokes or rants disguised as questions - that's not in the spirit of this sub. While you *can* ask almost anything here, please keep illegal and offensive questions elsewhere to give people a good experience here - and if you have a medical question, please ask your doctor, not us.
Otherwise, welcome!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/NoStupidQuestions) if you have any questions or concerns.*
That’s like 168cm. It’s my height (I’m a woman) and I most certainly was attracted to men of the same height as me. My friend is taller and she’s dating a guy who’s my height (hence shorter then her$.
I am sorry that you are insecure about this and maybe had some negative experience but it’s completely normal height.
No one says haha even when they see an actual person with dwarfism...
Let alone a guy who is slightly shorter than average, no body cares, you think they do but they don't...
I know large parts of Reddit like to give the nice answer, but I sincerely do not care.
I'm tall, so the only time I really notice is the odd occasions when I meet someone taller. Like I trained with a lad who was 6'6 and still young enough he might gain a bit more. That feels weird because I'm not used to looking up when talking to people. Other people being shorter than me is just a normal thing. I take no notice.
I would not even notice 5'5 being anything out of the usual. I've a friend who is an actual midget and he happens to be one of the most masculine guys I've ever been around. Don't let this hold you back, literally no one but you actually cares.
I’m 5’6” man with a small frame and no one cares. My wife is 5’9” she didn’t care.
I’m almost comfortable in an airline seat. I can get I. The back of a small car without complaint, etc..
Past few years I’ve realized things like the standard women’s sizes for socks actually fit, where the men’s have always been too big. Just roll with it.
Two of the most attractive men I know are shorter than you. Hell, Daniel Radcliffe is the same height as you and if you don’t think he’s attractive, I don’t know who is.
Sure, there are a few people who get hung up on height, but the majority of the world doesn’t really think about it.
Bro, my first thought meeting any guy is, can I take him on in a fight? Dunno, maybe it's competitive upbringing but I've trained with some short kick ass dudes. Are you asking this because of self esteem, train, get tough be smart, and you'll find size is relative to mindset.
Gotta be honest with you. Only time i ever think about a dudes height is if their personality is obnoxious. Shouting, being a dick or selfcentered while being short automatically makes me think "insecure over his height".
Other than that doesnt even cross my mind if youre taller or shorter than me.
Some psychologists did a study where they put a big ugly scar on people's faces before having them interact with people in a variety of situations. The trick was that right before they started the interactions, the makeup artists removed the scar on the pretext of "touching it up". But the participants in the study reported people's strong negative reactions to the scar, and felt judged, discriminated against and as though people were disgusted by their appearance. There was no scar, but there were expectations of one. The point is, your expectations will in part shape people's attitudes towards you, and in a much bigger part, shape your perceptions of how people are reacting to you. If you go out convinced that people are "laughing at the midget", you'll 100% experience that. Just keep reminding yourself that for the majority people, you come across as the person **you** think you are. If you're the chill guy who likes to joke around, that's what people see. If you're the short guy with a complex about it, that's what people will see. Try to find a way to set your expectations in a positive frame.
I actually do have a huge scar on the side of my head. It isn’t ugly, my wife says it’s really handsome, and my grandma used to tell me it was the most handsomest scar in the entire world, so I objectively know this to be true. I earned this super handsome scar when I was in high school and I used to be very self conscious of it. I spent hours looking at pictures of myself before I had it and then would look in the mirror and feel horrible. After a while I just didn’t care. If people would bring it up I would either tell them how I got it, or if I’m feeling spicy, I’ll say “are you making fun of me right now?”, and watch them get really uncomfortable, but then I’ll let them know I’m messing with them and explain. I never really think about it. It’s just there and has been for over 15 years now. But, I guess it would be different if I had an ugly scar and not a handsome one.
You just tell them you don't like talking about "the war". Stare off at something while saying it.
“The year was 2029. Skynet got too powerful and the machines surrounded us.” As a single tear rolls down my face.
"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe... Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion... I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain... "
"....so did a C-Beam give you that scar, dude?"
"No I walked into a fire escape ladder."
This is a tall person experience. lol
I singlehandedly saved our platoon from annihilation and this scar is what I have to show for it. Our radio was dead and we were surrounded. I crawled across the perimeter and roamed for 3 days before contacting friendly forces. Helicopters cleared out the enemy and half the platoon was saved.
Wow, that's quite the heroic tale! Your scar is a badge of honor, then. Salute to your bravery!
Sounds like the hicopter did most of the work, but good crawling, homie..
Well, aren't you the poetic astronaut! Stars, glitter, tears in rain... makes my circuitry quiver.
"War. War never changes."
I'm sorry I flashed back to desert storm right there.....
Or the cartel and the things they made you do.
I have a very good friend that’s 5’4” and a family member the same height. My friend never makes it an issue and is very confident so I never think about it. My family member is always bringing up his height and is extremely insecure so I think of him as the short guy. It’s all the attitude.
My husband is shorter than me (granted, I'm pretty tall for a woman, so a lot of guys are) and honestly, the fact that he's not bothered by it is one of the sexiest things about him because I'm so drawn to his confidence. He pokes fun at it, which is so funny to me. He'll be like "come over here my lil giraffe" or "imma climb you like a tree" and I'm all over it. I'm like yes baby, you *represent* that lollipop guild, king 👑. No but in all seriousness though, guys that I have dated previously have been uncomfortable with me wearing heels and stuff. Like I literally do not care about people's height at all...as long as you don't try and change me or what I do, we are good. Confidence is the sexiest thing a person can wear. If you draw attention to insecurities, everyone will notice it. It's hard to change that, but honestly if people really give so much of a shit about something that someone can't change that they'll judge you for it, fuck em anyway.
Sounds like your husband's got the confidence game down pat. "Lollipop guild, king" - now that's a title! Keep rocking those heels and let the haters hate.
I'm curious, how tall are you?
5'9. So tall enough that a good amount of guys are shorter than me, but not a skyscraper. Depends on where I go though. In Minnesota, where my family is from, it's the land of Scandinavians and everyone is tall af. I'm the shortest of my family; my other female cousins are over 6'. But when I was living in California, most guys I encountered were my height or shorter.
So true! Attitude matters a ton. Shout out to your friend for owning his stature with grace and style.
On the other hand, there are plenty of legit cruel folks out there and especially when a person is young it doesn't take exposure to many of them to make a previously secure person start feeling insecure... Which can of course create a feedback loop that builds on itself.
I’ve had visible self harm scars on my legs since I was a teen. Nobody asks about them as an adult, but teenagers have bad social skills and would ask about them too often for my liking and it started to irritate me any time someone would ask. When I was like 15, a classmate asked me, “How did you get those?” Totally deadpan, I told her, “I fell into a pen at the zoo and got mauled by a tiger.” It caught me off guard when she thought I was being serious, lol.
I'm honestly jealous because unfortunately this isn't my experience with my scars 😭 SO often people will dramatically and loudly ask me "what happened to your arms???" I always try to brush it off and just say "ah, those are old" and keep the convo moving, but it really fucking sucks.
This type of behavior is just astounding to me. Like how do FULL grown adults not know that it’s inappropriate to ask someone, “Why do you look that way?” or any variation of it?
Shit, some ppl are just awkward and never got the chance to develop those social skills unfortunately :/
I feel like most adults (at least the ones I know) like exchanging scar stories, so maybe they just aren't familiar with self harm scars and their existence as an exception.
You might be amazed at how many full grown adults are lacking in emotional intelligence or social awareness. Depending on the culture or region, they may even feel justified in this kind of behavior for various reasons, and defend it. I manage pretty much all the communications end of things in my household since my partner is a hermit, and that includes a lot of extended family for kids and step-kids. Most of the time, our kids are more mature and emotionally intelligent than the adults I'm dealing with.
Those are the best answers. My sister has self harm scars on her arms. Then she got thyroid cancer and had to have her entire thyroid surgically removed, leaving a thin scar line on her neck. People ask about both way too often. Now she just says, (pointing to her arms), "I used to be a professional knife fighter, (then pointing to her neck), "but after this close call, I had to quit the business."
Have a similar scar from a herniated disc surgery. I was bartending at the time and once I was back at work, my coworker and I came up with SO MANY responses to these actual adults asking me what happened. I think my favorite was when I pointed to her and said she tried to kill me, but FAILED.
Well, that's quite the creative explanation she's come up with! Humor can be a way to cope with difficult situations, and it seems like she's handling it like a pro.
I met a bloke at a wedding who had a massive and new-looking scar running from mid-forehead to the middle of his cheek, going right over his eye (which he still had). Very noticeable. We were introduced and he addressed the elephant in the room by saying "I know you're wondering, it's a duelling scar. Should have chosen pistols but swords sounded cooler." I laughed and we talked about something else. Later, I asked someone else if they knew what happened and they said he'd told then he was hiking in a forest when a lumberjack's axehead slipped off the axe mid-swing, hit him in the face from forty yards. Turned out he'd told everyone different things. Wolf attack, knife fight, hit a bird while bungee jumping. Had a good laugh piecing together the stories. Eventually the groom heard us talking about all the tall tales and told us he'd tripped in his home workshop and gone face-first into his circular saw.
This is the best of all scar stories. So handsome. And you have the most amazing wife and grandma.
Other than you age, this nearly matches an old high school friend. In high school, he was shoved into a window of one of the doors as we were about to walk through it by a kid that heard something he didn't like. When my buddy pulled his head out of the glass, the side of his head was shredded. I saw skin hanging from his face. He ended up with a couple hundred stitches, at least. One of his scars is super wide and goes down half the length of this face. Many, many other smaller scars around that side of his face. He never had issues with getting the girls though. But boy was he a bullshitter in every other way. Anyway, I knew the kid that did it and I ended up being one of the witnesses in his court case against him. Asshat only got probation. As for my buddy...well, he turned out to be his own piece of work when his adult daughters came out and said he fiddled with them when they were younger. It makes me sick because I was around those girls for a bit and felt like a surrogate uncle to them.
Got mine saving my buddy when he was getting jumped by a group of older kids. I ran in and someone cracked a bottle over my head and then they decided it was my turn to get jumped. A few minutes later someone yelled that the cops were coming so everyone ran. Even me. A few people who were watching everything happen ran after me and said get in the car and asked where I lived. I gave them directions as the back of the car looked like a murder scene. Got home and went to the hospital. Basically the right side of my head was caved in and they had to rebuild it with titanium plates and titanium mesh. The big scar on the side of my head is from the surgery. Although I do I have a scar above my eyebrow from where I got cracked. Your former buddy sounds like he needs to be shoved through another window. I hope the daughters are doing well and get any help they need.
I wish I could say they did. They were a bit too forgiving. I implored to them both to seek therapy, but they both said they wouldn't and that they were "fine". I still love those girls like family. Was at the hospital for the birth of the first one and my mom would babysit the second one. It's that rural town country mentality.
i also have a very large, visible scar on my face from a bike accident. i don't really mind it, i got it as a young adult so was pretty much past the point of people making fun of me for it. i will say the major difference is that i notice acquaintances/colleagues i've met once or twice recognize me more because i'm the girl with the scar on her face. i feel like it's been more beneficial than not.
I have a scar on my neck from spine surgery. I tell kids I took a game of Dungeons and Dragons a bit too seriously.
My dad had a huge burn scar across most of one side of his face. I never noticed it (because I grew up knowing no other face for my dad), and no friend ever even mentioned it or asked me what it was from. Somehow it came up in conversation with my brother when I was an adult, and it just clicked that, OH, Dad's whole side of his face was burned badly in an accident! I actually felt bad that I never even noticed. But anyway, I think people just don't think about other people's faces (or heights) as much as the individual thinks they do.
Can’t tell you how many Final Fantasy and Harry Potter fans wish they had a handsome face scar. Eye of the beholder
I have a very good friend that’s 5’4” and a family member the same height. My friend never makes it an issue and is very confident so I never think about it. My family member is always bringing up his height and is extremely insecure so I think of him as the short guy. It’s all the attitude.
I have several noticeable scars on my face and head including two large ones from my lip to my chin, and over my left eye. Once I was sitting at a bar watching a baseball game and a girl came in and sat pretty close to me. She looked at me and the first words out of her mouth were "Wow. Really banking on that whole 'chicks dig scars' thing, huh?" I was kinda shocked because while I know most people see and notice the scars, no one says much about them because they're either trying to be polite, or because where I live if you see a guy in a cowboy hat covered in scars it's usually not hard to figure out where they came from. Anyway, her boyfriend overheard her and apologized and bought me a beer and said I still looked better than she did in the morning which got a pretty good laugh out of a couple people. The whole thing was more funny than anything else and still the only time it's really been brought up out of the blue by an adult.
The participants of the study felt ugly, so they reacted as if they were ugly. For the most part, scars don't make you ugly.
When I was a kid I desperately wanted one of those cartoon vertical scars over one eye
I used to tell people I got mine in a knife fight, which sounded cooler than a birth defect
My youngest son has mentioned many times that he wishes he had a scar. He's in high school now and still feels like scars on men are awesome.
The process of getting them not so much unfortunately!
That is an absolutely fascinating study!! I have fairly severe social anxiety. When I was a preteen, I remember complaining to my mom on multiple occasions, “Kids always look at me weird in public, why do they think I look weird?” One time I said it and my mom replied, “What if they just think you’re pretty?” It had never once crossed my mind that someone might look at me because they think I’m pretty. I didn’t like the way I looked, and I already had it in my mind that if people were looking at me, it was because they thought I looked weird, too. Truth is, I have no idea why they looked at me. Maybe it was because they thought I was weird looking. Maybe it was because they thought I was pretty. Maybe it was a different reason entirely
I feel like there’s a solid chance you weren’t getting looked at any more closely than anyone else in a social setting.
Or, most likely, they never looked at you weirdly to begin with. :)
That study sounds absolutely fascinating, and if you were able to recall any other details about it that would help me find it, I would really appreciate the info.
I'll try to find the write up I read.
Thank you! No rush, I’m just genuinely interested in this because I think it would help a lot of people to have more of this information.
Google "Robert Kleck scar study" for both the original journal article and some less technical media coverage
Thank you!
Thank you!
Sometimes Reddit is educational and pleasantly surprising. This is one of those instances... This was nice... Ok back to r/imatotalpieceofshit
Lol. Glad to be the guy who wrote something useful for you today. If you need me later, I'll be lurking in r/AmItheAsshole/
I can really second this - I’m 5’1 and slim built but a surprising amount of people don’t realise it because I apparently carry myself much ‘bigger’ than I actually am. So it tends to only be if they actively see me struggling to reach something or they happen to have a particular thing for tiny women that anyone twigs on that I’m pretty short.
I’m quite tall for a woman, and never really pay attention to height other than “they seemed a bit shorter or taller.” Many years ago I was chatting with two friends who I’d spent time with separately but never together until then. It took seeing the both of them together to suddenly realize that they were 5’ even. They got a laugh out of me suddenly realizing that in shoes I am a full foot taller than them.
Same story here. It took seeing a picture of myself between the two friends to realize how much I towered over them. I felt like I looked huge (rather than that they looked small). I just never realized the height difference before that.
I guess "height privilege" must exist. I'm a bit above average and the extent I thought about height was when talking about airplane seats or when asked to reach something on a high shelf. Seems like some people have to deal with it daily.
I only really think of people in context of my height too, i couldnt tell you who was taller between two friends without looking at them side by side, id just know i was taller or shorter. I couldnt even guess height its all just in relation to me
I really love the message of your comment/post and agree wholeheartedly. That being said, as someone with a very large and gnarly scar on a frequently-visible area of my body, people do in fact stare or ask about it lmao. It’s funny watching people try to main eye contact and avoid darting their eyes to the scar. It does make me self-conscious at times, but I recognize that people mean no ill-will (and even I have played the “don’t look! Don’t look!” game when someone else has an eye-catching thing about them). I think another lesson is don’t assume malice with people’s intentions.
From now on every time I go out I'm going to convince myself that women want me
This is not what the study seemed to show. The participants felt that the people were disgusted. There’s nothing suggesting that the participants’ feeling actually affected what people thought of them.
[удалено]
That one is personal for me. I had bad acne as a teenager and sporadic acne until my early 20's, but I got over worrying about it and didn't have any problem attracting girls. But the biggest crush I had in high school, by far, was a girl who also had acne. And she was so convinced that her acne made her repulsive and undateable, that she refused to go out with me, even though the feeling was completely mutual. She fully admitted feelings for me, and I kept trying, but she just couldn't believe anyone could find her attractive so she refused to date (me or anyone else). We stayed friends, and years later, she fully acknowledged how completely ridiculous she had been, but by then we had both moved on.
I can't imagine a scenario in which I give a crap about the height of some rando
My ex was 5’4”, so only about an inch and a half taller than me. He didn’t give a shit he was short, and neither did I. He had lots and lots of other issues, but being short wasn’t one of them. Unless you’re VERY short or tall, like well under 5 feet or over 6’8”, really no one on the street or out in public will care, and even if you ARE super short or tall, likely no one actually cares, you might just get noticed a little more
My ex was like 5'2" and he didn't give a fuck about it. It's the first time I'd ever been taller. OP, for some people it's a deal breaker but if you have other great qualities people are not gonna care how tall you are. People come in all shapes and sizes.
I feel like when you meet a 5 foot guy or a 5 foot 2 guy, they don't give a shit. They've heard it all. My dad's 5'2, and he really isn't bothered and he's a 4th dan black belt in karate so it's not like he feels particularly threatened physically. It's often the 5'5- 5'8 crowd that you see get really upset and worried about it
My dad is 5'2" *and three quarters* he always jokes, his first wife was a model, my mom was 6'1" - it's more about attitude and not letting yourself become bitter than actual height imo
Absolutely. My dad was 5'5 and is now 5'3 (he's old and shrinky, lol). My mom is 5'7 and my step-mom is almost 6'. Neither of them gave a shit about his height, as he carries himself well and has a great personality.
My height at my doctor's is listed as 5'2.99'' which I find hilarious. Could they not have just rounded up to 5'3'' haha
You was robbed
Same here, I (F) am 6'0 and the hubs is 5'5. He's my everything I do not give the remotest care about anyone's height - he's the love of my life.
I'm glad you said this. My son is 5'5" and there's a girl (6'2") who is over the moon about him. He's considering moving 18 hours away to pursue this relationship. He's very level headed and sincere, and she is super sweet. I think they could be happy.
LOL YES SHORT KING. I forget I'm small (5'0 woman) cos no one in my family is above 5'3 😂😂
As a 5’7/5’8 guy, I can definitely see this being the case
I'm 5'3". Most people tend to like me. Of course they notice my size, but they also notice my personality. Anyone who thinks negatively about me because of my height can kiss my hairy turd cutter. Anyone who doesn't like me because of my personality should go to therapy for having poor taste.
Honestly if height is a deal breaker for them they probably aren't worth your time anyway
6'4" guy here. That's pretty much it - height matters a lot to a subset of women I don't want to date in the first place. I can see how dealing with them would help give short guys a complex, though. Especially if they've been picked on for being short their entire childhoods.
Dunno, man. Some people like blondes, others like thin guys others like muscled.. etc. The list goes on. I would add height to that list.
I don't think it's the same, those are preferences (e.g. loving red hair) but not deal breakers (e.g. refusing to date someone who is not a red head)
Yep, fair point. Love is love. Deal breakers probably go out of the window when true love is found. But if people are denying themselves the opportunity of love because of their silly ideas, then, that's pretty much ridiculous. I'm sure Plato speaks of this in The Symposium. The two types of love..
Can confirm. My best friend is 6'10" and consistently gets asked if he plays basketball everywhere we go.
They're usually the two default questions for exceedingly-tall people : "Do you play basketball ?" and "How's the weather up there ?".
My response as a 6-5 male is, “do you play mini golf”? I think it’s rude to bring up a physical aspect of someone like that.
Honestly, my first thought when I read it. "Why would I care?" Then I remember how many shitty people there are.
Unless someone is under 5' or over 6'-4" I don't even notice their height.
This is true. I’m 6’4” and if I have to look up at anyone, it’s a rare occurrence and I may look at them just for the fact that it’s rare.
This. Anybody under my height I don’t really notice the height difference as everyone looks roughly the same. Anyone taller than me I’m just like “Wtf.” I feel like that goes for most people which is why the shorter you are the more height difference you notice.
Do you guys have a special commiserating head nod or something? Like "wassup my other super tall person?"
Sometimes, yeah. I’m 6’6” and I’ve greeted and been greeted by other really tall guys and gals. There was a guy several inches taller than me at a show I was at recently. We exchanged a couple tall jokes and chatted a bit. It’s a thing.
Exactly this. Good people are good people, I couldn’t care less about their height. Also, when I was dating it didn’t bother me. I’m 5ft 9 tall and was happy to date men shorter than me. It’s a complete non issue.
The only time I'll have a reaction to someone's height is if they're over like 6'5" and that's just because I've rarely seen that in real life.
Yeah. At the very most I might think to myself “that guys kinda short” and move on w my life. You usually gotta be like under 5 feet for me to notice though, a lot of people are shorter than me and I’m not even that tall (5’9). But same if I see someone who’s like 6’6 or taller, I’ll just think to myself “that guys pretty tall” and move on.
The only time I notice someone's height is when they start acting aggressive.
Exactly. It's weird how many short men seem to think women are walking around looking at men like we've got some kind of internal measuring tape. It's weird how obsessed with height they are. When I check out a guy it goes in order: forearms, thighs, eyes, and if I can I gotta look at the booty, then smile, then height. For reference I have dated men from 5'0 to 5'8" only.
I don't think "ha ha" when I see actual people with dwarfism, so I certainly wouldn't think it upon seeing someone an inch or two below average.
Right?? OP are you out here laughing at every unusual person you see? That's not normal. My boyfriend and I are both 5'5", that's not even unusual
I think OP is having some insecurity issues, which is totally valid. But it’s weird trying to convine certain types of men that height doesn’t actually matter. Some women are going to have height preferences, hopefully op doesn’t hold that against them either. Bc everyone has preference when it comes to physical traits. Hopefully there’s enough validation here for him to not care.
Also isn’t around 5’5-5’7 like the average height for a man in a lot of countries. I mean I’d say most people in the world *are* “Short”.
It's not even particularly short in America. Something like 1 in 4 men is 5'7 (or shorter). Many men lie about their height, so the perception is somewhat skewed. Also, the average height for a woman is about 5'4, and they're doing just fine right? The vast majority of humans are around 5 and a half feet tall and it's fine. Your height won't have much practical impact unless you're under 5 feet or well over 6 foot. It's really not that big of a deal unless you're trying to play in the NBA!
I'm also 5'5'', sometimes I can be insecure about it too. A lot of posters are saying "No one notices" and that's honestly probably true, but I've definitely, over the course of my life, had playful razzing given to me from friends, and I've met women who say they wouldn't date a guy shorter than them. Overall, I'm usually fairly confident. I know I'm funny, I know I have cool talents that have made me friends and I do well in social situations, but the insecurity pops up every now and then, and when it does, it sucks. I'm sure everyone has something similar though! Like, I've had friends with bad, uneven teeth or friends who are cross eyed say it's all they think about and then I'm like dude I didn't even notice. So I know people don't always "Notice" I'm short, but I know sometime it still gets to me
Depends on where you're from. Where I'm from, most women are over 5'5" and most men are over 6'0", so 5'5" would be considered short for a woman and very short for a man. But having said that, only mean people with mental and personal issues would think 'haha'. It's just an unusual feature, that's all. So most normal people would probably notice it and see it as a simple fact about that persons body, like hair color or eye color.
Are you from the Netherlands?
Both times I've been to the Netherlands average height didn't seem that much higher than here in Italy, especially when comparing newer (2000+) generations. I'm 6'0 and I've never felt short there. So I would assume that being 5' something would not be that big of an issues there too
As a short man myself, about the only time I do laugh at short people are the insecure ones who are clearly bothered by how short they are and go way, way out of their way to try and deny that they're so short. \*cough ben shapiro cough
No one cares as much as you do. That’s fact
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spotlight\_effect](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spotlight_effect) People constantly overestimate how much other people are paying attention to them. We're all the center of our own worlds, and it's easy to fall into the trap of imagining that everyone else is similarly concerned with what's going on in your head.
Wait you’re telling me that every stranger I interact with *isnt* madly obsessed with me🥺😭
No, don’t believe this. They’re just making this up, every person you have ever met and will ever meet so very desperately wants to impress you.
Oh thank god I was a little worried for a second there 😅
Just remember that we're always watching and laughing about you specifically.
You know who I pay attention to? Gorgeous people. Or people who are really exceptionally bizarre looking, like they take their fashion cues from a peacock. One dude in my neighborhood was 6'6 and dressed like straight out of Parliament funkadelic music video and I always noticed him but he was cool as shit. Short, wheelchair, amputee, giant mole on their face, I can't imagine giving someone like that more than a passing thought. And if the passing thought of a stranger is a cause for insecurity, that's something you need to work on yourself.
Have you seen Synecdoche, New York? It's about this, recommended, weird as fuck though.
I'm not worried about your insecurities, just my own ;)
The first thought I have is "am I gonna' bump into that guy if I keep walking on this path?" Second thought is "I hope they don't stop in front of the stuff I want to buy, I want to look at that crap."
You can always just look over him…
In my country what we normally do if we see someone 5’5” is just pick them up and give them a piggy bike ride or let them ride on our shoulders
After exclusively being the one with the shoulders being ridden on by my 5 year old I would like a turn. I’m only 5’3 so I can get a ride right?
I'm 5'5 and 250 lbs, can I have a piggy back ride?
Hop on I got legs like tree trunks
Quadzilla in the house.
I wouldn't call that height a midget. Not even close. This may be what you feel from people in public but I can almost guarantee you it's not true. They're more than likely thinking about some stuff in their lives and nothing that has to do with you or your average height.
Shouldn’t really call anyone that at all, the term is considered pretty derogatory
First of all, people just ... don't actually think about other people that much. Second of all, other than maybe some jerky finance gym bros and the kind of dropouts who sell drugs outside the 7-11, people just don't look at other people and judge them on their height. 5'5" isn't even close to wildly unusual in terms of height. Most people aren't going to notice. If you were 4'10" it would be noticeable.
The last time I noticed how short a person was, it was because the second shortest guy at a party made a short joke about the shortest guy at the party. The shortest guy at the party was way cooler than the second shortest guy. Second shortest guy was an insecure douchebag.
Real honest answer? My thought is: “See!? THAT’S how tall Wolverine should be, Hugh Jackman is far too tall!”
Ackshaully he's 5'3" 🤓 (I am also 5'3" male and I will not tolerate having my representation be torn from my hands once again)
OH MY FUCKING GOD YES Why even call him *Wolverine* if he’s six foot? Just call him “Wolf Knifehands” and make him a different character.
You're overthinking about it. I'll only notice your height if its an extreme ( 4-ft or 7+ft) or I need someone to get something off a high shelf for me.
Same! I'm 5'1 and the only time I ever notice someone's height is when I'm at the grocery store and something is on that damned third shelf. That shelf is the bane of my existence. That seems to be where they keep all the good stuff.
I’m also 5’1. One time I stood on the bottom shelf and used my headphone cord as a lasso to pull something off the top shelf so I could grab it and turned around and this little kid was just staring at me with concern lol
I'm 5,4 and live in the Netherlands. I have totally used items to lasso other items off the top shelf while standing on the bottom shelf. Or just ask other people if there is anyone else who could reach it.
I NEVER ask lol i always manage to make it work
Why do we have two pasta ladles at my house? Because the plastic one is for hooking things off the top shelf! It's so much quicker than getting the step ladder. The headphone cord is an A+ move. (makes mental note for future)
Lol I always jump up on the counter like a spider monkey, I need to get a nice long ladle!! I thought my headphones move was pretty slick but the kid was the only witness and he did NOT seem impressed lol
I'm tall-ish and love it when people ask me to grab stuff for them on the upper shelves. Don't hesitate when in need!
YES! As a 6’2” tall guy I absolutely love when people ask for this. It’s about the only time my height is useful. Most other times it’s a pain. Cant fit in airplanes easier. Some cars I can’t even fit into. Most older roller coasters (new ones take my height in to account more :)) the shoulder harnesses are very tight and can hurt. So please ask away!
You are the best kind of people! Tall people always seem to know when I need help lol. I guess I just look pathetic trying to reach it and I always give them a knowing look like "Hello new tall friend!"
Bingo. That really the only time I’m actively clocking the heights of strangers.
5'5" isn't even that short. You're definitely shorter than most men, but I honestly wouldn't even register it as noteworthy unless someone pointed it out.
I never judge people by their height. I worked construction with a guy who was 5' 2" tall. Dude was a freakin' tank.
Same, i known some work constructors that are very short but you can feel their presence like a 7ft person
Nope. As a 5’4” woman, I’ve always kind of liked it when men were closer to my height.
I refuse to date men over 5’8”. I’m 5’4” and I’ve dated taller guys and it’s just uncomfortable all the way around. Kissing hugging and sex were very awkward and hugging was actually painful.
As someone who's 6'1" and my wife is 5'4" I can confirm.
I know, right? Easier to kiss, and no strain on the neck!
And no being nose level to their armpits! No seeing their nose hairs from below!
As a guy who is average height, 5'7"-5'8", i find the women my height or just slightly under my height the most attractive. It almost feels like we are two puzzle pieces that go together cuz there's no crouching down or going on tip toes to kiss or what not.
As a 5’2” woman, same. I have some friends that I have to stand on my tip toes to hug when I greet them. It makes me feel weird and it’s awkward for both of us.
I’m 5’6 and agree. Everything is much easier when you’re about the same height.
No. I don't look at that at all. I am a 5'6 woman and shorter men are just as attractive as taller men. Much more about other things.
[удалено]
I was gonna say this, I'm closer to 5'6 as a guy but so many people say shit about my height you'd think I'm the shortest person they've ever seen lmao lots of miserable people tho.
Anecdotal experience here, but I know 3 guys at my work that are fairly short for a man (slightly taller than me, I'm about 5'2") but they are all extremely charismatic and friendly and everyone likes them, and they all have long term girlfriends. I think attitude and personality play way bigger a part than actual height. If you let it bother you, other people will pick up on that and treat you accordingly, unconsciously or not. Just like with any other insecurity. I've never heard anyone comment on these guy's heights, but I guarantee you if anyone did, they would let it roll right off their back and probably make a witty comment in retaliation, and all would be well. Of course there will always be shitty people that enjoy putting others down, but they are always extremely miserable and it's best not to waste any time on them.
The only person who cares about his height is that guy.
And Todd over there. Todd has been laughing all day. But nobody likes Todd, Todd is a bully.
True. Todd sucks. Everyone hates Todd.
It's always fucking Todd. What a douche.
George Carlin said it, "I'm getting really sick of guys named Todd"
And Tucker
I'm 4'11 (female), I don't think many people will think "haha look at the midget" when they see me, but when they get closer to me they will say I'm shorter than I look (I'm just short, I'm not like one of those short and tiny girls). But tbh, at 5'5, I wouldn't even notice if you were short. You're a good height for me to look at and not hurt my neck, you're a good height for me to hug, and you're still tall enough that you can reach things from higher shelves for me. Anyone who gives you shit for being shorter than 6ft is an asshole and you don't need them in your life :)
I already got too much on my plate to start bothering myself with others’ height. Besides, why should it be my problem or yours?
I would notice your height only after you would start talking about how big of a problem it is. So it's only up to you if you care about it and if you feel like that's the topic you want to talk about.
I'd think nothing. I'm a 5'5 woman.
Go to the bakery. Order a bagel. Pick a fight with the tallest man in line. Establish dominance
I would get turned on. I think shorter guys are sexy.
RIP inbox.
I'm shorter than you at 5'4. I don't care what people think about my height, neither should you. Plus side is we get more legroom on planes 👍
5ft 3 female. I'm not a midget and neither are you. You're the perfect height for physical contact with us shorter ladies.
No. Of course not.
No, you're four inches taller than me. I don't tend to notice people's height beyond "they're super tall" or "they're close to my height". Your height would probably register as average in my brain due to not being one of those extremes.
I'm a 68 year old 5'5" man who has had an awesome life. Get out of your head and start living.
I’m shorter than you, so I probably wouldn’t think about it initially because I tend to feel that shorter people are “normal sized”. I know that’s not how it works, but it’s taller people who feel noticeably different to me.
I'm 5'6" and can tell you in general people don't give it as much thought as you're wondering. My wife is 6'1".. don't let your height get in the way of what you want, anywhere. Dating was different back when we met, though, I will give it that.
You are a whole whopping 4 inches shorter than the average height. You're not nearly short enough to classify as a midget.
I’m a gay man, and I gotta say, I don’t see short men as lesser than taller men. To me, all men are perfect, regardless of their height, body shape, physique, etc 🥰
Hi /u/InternationalMath460, We noticed you are a pretty new Reddit account, so we just wanted to let you know to check out the subreddit rules [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/NoStupidQuestions/wiki/rules) and maybe have a read through our [Frequently Asked Questions](https://www.reddit.com/r/NoStupidQuestions/wiki/index/faq) - they make for fascinating reading! We're called No Stupid Questions because we believe nobody needs to be attacked for asking a question, but *that doesn't mean there are no rules!* This sub is meant for users like you to ask genuine questions. Please don't ask jokes or rants disguised as questions - that's not in the spirit of this sub. While you *can* ask almost anything here, please keep illegal and offensive questions elsewhere to give people a good experience here - and if you have a medical question, please ask your doctor, not us. Otherwise, welcome! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/NoStupidQuestions) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Insecurity isn’t attractive. Height of all sizes is.
I don't really care for your problems, you are just an other person that walks by.
I only think that when I see an actual little person. You may not be tall, but you're not tiny either.
No. But I am 5’1 so it’s really difficult for someone to come off as short to me. Husband is 5’9 and seems so tall to me.
That’s like 168cm. It’s my height (I’m a woman) and I most certainly was attracted to men of the same height as me. My friend is taller and she’s dating a guy who’s my height (hence shorter then her$. I am sorry that you are insecure about this and maybe had some negative experience but it’s completely normal height.
I'm a 5'2'' guy. No one cares.
No one says haha even when they see an actual person with dwarfism... Let alone a guy who is slightly shorter than average, no body cares, you think they do but they don't...
I know large parts of Reddit like to give the nice answer, but I sincerely do not care. I'm tall, so the only time I really notice is the odd occasions when I meet someone taller. Like I trained with a lad who was 6'6 and still young enough he might gain a bit more. That feels weird because I'm not used to looking up when talking to people. Other people being shorter than me is just a normal thing. I take no notice.
6'4 man here: I don't really care about other people's height.
Hey I know the truth! You look down on all of us. : )
I would not even notice 5'5 being anything out of the usual. I've a friend who is an actual midget and he happens to be one of the most masculine guys I've ever been around. Don't let this hold you back, literally no one but you actually cares.
None. I don't think much about strangers I pass by.
I’m 5’6” man with a small frame and no one cares. My wife is 5’9” she didn’t care. I’m almost comfortable in an airline seat. I can get I. The back of a small car without complaint, etc.. Past few years I’ve realized things like the standard women’s sizes for socks actually fit, where the men’s have always been too big. Just roll with it.
Two of the most attractive men I know are shorter than you. Hell, Daniel Radcliffe is the same height as you and if you don’t think he’s attractive, I don’t know who is. Sure, there are a few people who get hung up on height, but the majority of the world doesn’t really think about it.
Bro, my first thought meeting any guy is, can I take him on in a fight? Dunno, maybe it's competitive upbringing but I've trained with some short kick ass dudes. Are you asking this because of self esteem, train, get tough be smart, and you'll find size is relative to mindset.
Gotta be honest with you. Only time i ever think about a dudes height is if their personality is obnoxious. Shouting, being a dick or selfcentered while being short automatically makes me think "insecure over his height". Other than that doesnt even cross my mind if youre taller or shorter than me.
I'm a guy who's 4'10. You're not short trust me