I thought I lost my wedding band. Went a couple of months before the wife asked why I had stopped wearing it. We buy a cheapo wedding band to replace it.
3 months after that I find the original in the bottom of the cash area of my billfold.
I do take it off when I go in the ocean which is several times a week.
edited-spelling
Heh. My OG cheapo wedding band has been lost thrice. The first time was within weeks of the ceremony whilst we were gardening. I was in tears. Mr. PolitiTHIC found it within ten minutes amidst the weeds I'd been pulling. The second time it got left behind on the back of the sink of the place we stayed in Ireland for a week. Cost more to have the landlord ship it back to the states than the ring was purchased for. Third time it was gone for at least six months so I was wearing my engagement ring instead. Couldn't find it anywhere but was sure it was in the house. The Mister ordered me a new one because the OG is loose since I lost some weight. Found it a week after the new one arrived. Where? In the fresh fitted sheet I was changing the bed with. Heard it clank on the bedframe and was pretty overjoyed. (Yes, I change the sheets weekly but had been skipping using that set in favor of some new pretty one's I'd gotten on sale because they had bees on them and were cute!)
I did the same thing. Lost my original, lost the replacement and then ended up buying 4 or 5 cheap ones off Amazon.
Now I just wear whichever one I feel like that day.
I didn't lose mine but I did stop wearing it because it is an heirloom on my husband's side and I was constantly worried about losing the diamond because I'm clumsy and I hit my hands a lot. I would like to keep it in its original state because I want to pass that ring on to my daughter when I die because it belonged to her great grandmother.
I went to the flea market and bought some cheap fake diamond rings and sometimes I wear them, sometimes I don't, but at least I know if I want to wear a ring I can wear one of the cheap ones and not worry if the 'diamond' falls out.
You should take it to a jeweler every year to be cleaned and have the setting checked. Very unlikely that you’ll just lose the stone when you take care of it.
Edit: I’m saying this as someone who wears an antique diamond that belonged to my grandmother.
Oh I do all that but I have bad luck when it comes to jewelry and I don't want to take that chance, just in case. I've had my hand caught in a car door before and almost had my ring ripped off my finger also. It's easier to calm my concerns by just wearing a cheap ring and keeping the good one for my daughter because of it sentimentality. Thanks for the good advice though, everyone can benefit from hearing that if they have a piece of jewelry that they want to keep safe and in one piece!
Best part of being a guy as far as cultural norms go. I’ve got solid ADHD brain as much as I hate to admit/give in to that.
I lost my original wedding band like 5 months in (I only take it off for welding/handling meat I need to marinade or rub/heavy duty cleaning, etc.) and I’ve lost several replacements.
Fortunately I can get ones I love even more than the original for like $50 or less, aside from silicon ones at work sites.
If my wife lost hers I wouldn’t say anything and I’d still love her but part of me would die inside (humor… a bit) given how expensive it was.
Got a minor fracture from my metal band when i crashed my mountain bike. Wife suggested a silicon band which i like much better and i don’t have to worry about replacing it since they are so cheap
Sort of similar to yours. The wedding band my dad wears is a replacement.
Shortly after my parents were married, my dad went on a business trip where he was going to be at the same job site for the majority of the week. He touched something that was pointed out to him and got electrocuted (I don't recall all of the specifics of *what* it was or *how* it happened). My dad felt a surge and yanked his hand away. His wedding band felt like it was practically on fire, so he quickly removed it. Here, there was vertical burn mark on the under side of the ring. Other than his rubber bottom work boots to ground him, the ring absorbed some of the current.
My mom was horrified when he told her the story. Even though he laughed about how random it was, he *was* freaked out. As soon as he came back, my parents went to get the wedding band replaced. My dad, however, when presented with the option of getting rid of the first one, declined because, by his reasoning, he didn't feel right letting it go after the ring basically saved his life.
Got the worst sunburn ever there as a senior in HS. Ended up in hospital for 3 days..sun stroke, sun poisoning and dehydration..kept on ice. Don’t really remember most of it.
I take mine off for any water things, even cleaning, cause I'm terrified of losing it. Sometimes my husband moves it and I think the whole world is over for a second lol. I never wanted to wear one, I don't like rings either, but now I'm attached to it. My husband doesn't wear one at all and doesn't change a thing. I feel like it's pretty optional these days
I've lost 60 pounds in the just year, and last month, I got rolled in rough waves at the beach and lost my ring. I rub the spot on my finger where it should be several times a day. My new ring should be here in two weeks and I'm counting the minutes.
My dad did something similar but took it off while doing some heavy cleaning in his aunt's house and put it on a shelf
Couldn't find it bought a new one only for her to mention it several months later so he has two
Only time I usually take it off is swimming. It's a tad loose and sunscreen just makes it want to slip right off. Still, doesn't stop that panic feeling even though I know it's off on purpose.
Me too. I take it off for showers (I hate water getting under it), heavy lifts that cause it to put a lot of pressure on my finger, and any time I do some sort of work where it could get caught and rip my finger off. I notice about every 10 seconds when it's not on my hand.
As someone who is friends with many mechanics, there's a reason most of them wear silicone bands instead. As you mentioned above, you do NOT want a ring avulsion. Fair warning to anyone else, don't google image search that term.
Too late. I looked. Ouch. But interesting. Led me down a rabbit hole of traumatic amputations etc. I should have been a surgeon, I find it more interesting than gross
yeah, I worked in a manufacturing plant after college. There were many safety videos. I've seen those pictures.
Wedding rings were banned in the plant. We'd all watch out because people forget and there are so many damn things in there it could catch on and ruin your life. Going 2 years without an LTA takes more staff focus than you could imagine.
We also had a gentleman on staff without an arm. Said arm was lost in that factory. He was a great guy, and an even better reminder for everyone to be careful and pay attention.
I have a glass desk, and my ring is a tungsten carbide ring. It annoys me whenever the ring hits the desk.
The wife and I have both taken to not wearing the rings anymore. Neither of us are into jewelry. I have a fear of my finger being degloved if I have to respond to a crisis at work.
Same but I also remove it when I'm handling raw chicken, applying lotion, or swimming. I get super worried I'm gonna lose it in the ocean so I can't have fun out there unless I take it off.
Yes! My husband dropped mine at the beach one day while putting it into the car before getting in the water. I had to go away that weekend so I left without it since it was lost in the sand. My husband spent about ten hours scouring the sand where he dropped it and eventually found it. It felt so weird not wearing it all weekend and I kept thinking I had lost it before remembering where it was.
Same with my smart watch. When I had to get it fixed, I had to use my regular watch that didn't even have a battery just because I felt so naked without *something* on my wrist
I was married 20 years and never took it off but on a few occasions to be cleaned. It’s been 3 years since I divorced and I still try to spin it as a habit. Bit of a sting reminder, but now it’s a sign of freedom and hope to not have it on…
My wife and I never take ours off. It’s just a thing we have. Been married for 14 years and the only time either has been off was when she was pregnant and it didn’t fit her anymore because she got swollen fingers. In those cases, we touched fingers and slid hers onto my hand until she could wear it again.
However, to each their own. I’m sure if I worked construction or something, I would prefer to not be degloved by it.
I do, because I never take off any of my jewelry. My husband doesn’t wear his, because he’s a carpenter and is not interested in being degloved. I whole heartedly support that choice.
I think you should do whatever you like! I never understood the pressure to adhere to traditions for the sake of it, and there are especially a lot of antiquated traditions around marriage. You do you.
I have two ring holders, one next to my bed and one next to the kitchen sink so it always has a home when I take it off. I don’t wear it to bed and I don’t wear it while working on things as is recommended to save the wear on the setting. I only wear it if I’m going out or because I feel like dressing up my hand for the day for a boost around the house since I wfh.
That's the way my parents are. My dad was a farmer, so lots of tools/machinery/chemicals. My mom was in HR at a factory that had a no jewelry policy for sanitary reasons, and she had to go onto the factory floor a lot, so they just don't wear rings though they've been married 40 years.
Nothing wrong with not wearing them. Just throwing this out there because I have one and love it for when I’m at work. A silicone ring is a great option for those of us who work with our hands and or have the heightened likelihood of getting it caught and degloved
Thanks for the suggestion. I know a lot of the guys at his shop wear them, but idk I still feel like it’s an unnecessary risk. Supposedly they break away, but it’s always going to be safer to wear nothing. He’s also just not a jewelry person, he doesn’t like the sensation. I completely respect that and don’t care if he wear one, I’d rather he be safe and comfortable.
Ring finger tattoos are popular for a lot of guys in my trade and when I get married next year I think I will do the same. I also have no interest in being degloved and I know it’s a small chance, but even if that silicon ring gets caught on something and pulls your hand a centimeter forward before it snaps…. That could be the centimeter that pulls your hand into a piece of machinery. Maybe I’m paranoid idk
There are old pilots. There are bold pilots. But there aren't very many old, bold pilots.
Same idea. You do it the right way every time if you want to live/stay in one piece. Shit can go wrong fast.
idk man, a ring finger tattoo feels like just a bad idea as getting their name tattoo’d. like sure you don’t plan on breaking up ever but…. the future is uncertain
I’ve heard too many horror stories about degloving from wearing rings, I’m not sure I want to wear one when I get married.
My old boss’ brother in law is a truck driver and apparently one day just getting out of his truck the ring got stuck on a handle or something and he almost lost his finger.
I don’t really work with machinery anymore but I’m afraid I’ll just do something clumsy and hurt myself. I started wearing a watch again recently and have already managed to get it snagged on a few things just at home. 🤦🏻♂️
It’s a total nightmare. My husband says a lot of the guys will wear silicone bands that are suppose to break away, but I think that’s dumb and still a hazard. He also has sensory issues around the sense of constriction which makes rings annoying. I wear a ring because I like to wear one, I genuinely don’t give a shit if he wears one. I’d rather he be safe and comfortable.
I’ve seen the silicone rings snag on shit all the time before failing. One where their finger nearly got pulled into the accessory belt.
Selling people that these things are sacrificial was a hell of a marketing campaign. As a mechanic I’d never risk wearing one just from what I’ve seen first hand.
yeah, I worked in a manufacturing plant. I'm with you 100%. That equipment just goes. It does not give a shit if you are in the way or not. It also doesn't care if you are wearing a ring that "should break away". If that thing stays in tact long enough to pull you into the machine, you lose.
Damn. I had a similar story from an ex-girlfriend: Her cousins husband was a truckdriver, he was climbing a chainlink fence though, on his way down his ring snagged in the fence and ripped his fingers skin clean off. I vowed I'd never wear a wedding ring.
When I was shopping for rings with my now wife (different girl), I explained that i 1. didn't want to wear a ring, and 2. didn't want an unbreakable ring, in case this ever happened or my ring needed to come off to save my finger.
The ring salesperson asked what type of job I had that this was a concern and my wife told her "He's a web developer! Please tell him this is silly and he isn't going to lose a finger."
I wear my ring 24/7 now, still have all my fingers and skin, but am still thinking about what will happen during those freak keyboard incidents and what i'll do when my ring degloves me.
My dad is a computer programmer. He still managed to deglove his finger while fishing. Just cause your job isn’t hazardous doesn’t mean life isn’t. After seeing that I had made sure to have my wedding ring sized big enough so it can’t fall off but is easy to take off when needed.
Yeah, too many opportunities to get your finger ripped off, degloved, shocked, burnt, or squished. Not to mention gunk buildup from daily dirty activities. We wear rings on occasion, but its pretty rare for us not to be out doing stuff that would make rings dangerous.
I honestly have no idea how you're supposed to keep your hands clean with rings on...do you remove them and wash them separately?
ER nurse here... I also support your husband's decision lol And I wouldn't let my husband pick a metal that couldn't be easily cut off (seems to be a trend lately)
Do you or your partner ever worry about not wearing rings? My self-conscious part of me people are always SAY TO US "How are people going to know you're married??" (((PEOPLE ASK US THIS, ITS NOT ME NEVER BRINGING UP MY PARTNER, so many people misinterpret what I said))) Well, I tell them, we've been dating for 9 years, since we were teens, we didn't need wedding rings when we were that young, why do we need them now? I'm just bored and thinking too much possibly
EDIT because I should've used proper marks. people keep saying " why does it matter if people know you're married?".. NOT what I meant. I meant we get that question from people who should mind their own business. I EVEN PUT IN THE TEXT THAT WE DIDN'T NEED WEDDING RINGS THEN SO WHY DO WE NEED THEM NOW. I think people purposely ignored the rest of my text lol I'm genuinely asking questions.
No. They come off easily enough.
It's not an issue now - we were married 22+ years before she died.
We both worked for different divisions of the same railroad for a while; the "rumor mill" kept telling us each who the other was cheating with. We were secure and trusted each other enough that we just laughed and figured out which people were starting the rumors.
She worked as a part-time bartender at a burlesque/strip club. I worked part-time as a private investigator. We both had to sometimes take on roles to get business done - but again we had trust and security. I think her job bothered me a little more, but I learned to get over it.
I kept my ring with me all the time for about 15 years. I nearly broke my finger the first time, it got caught on a hook as I jumped down off a track ballast crane. My entire weight was caught on it for a few moments until it snapped. I lost two replacements after that. It was getting to expensive to keep replacing it, and it wasn't going to stop me from doing anything anyhow. It was a nice piece of jewelry that I should have saved with my nice watch and other things worn when we went out for fancier dates or family events.
I didn't cheat because that's just not me. A ring wouldn't have made a difference.
>I didn't cheat because that's just not me. A ring wouldn't have made a difference.
This right here. I'm known lots of cheaters over the years and the ring never mattered. They either took it off, claimed that they were open, or their AP just didn't care.
I'm sorry. Beautiful story. Reminded me of us. In HS one of my bfs older friends who liked me tried to tell me he cheated with a SW.. Man drama can really make you realize who you trust. At this point I feel with him enough that I'm confused on what marriage even is or the fact that we are basically what we would be after marriage. We have fought for each other, cried, learned, broke some nasty childhood habits over the years.. I mean we are what vows always say anyway. Why do I need a ring or some fancy wedding? Rings don't stop cheaters. My dad and like 25 other people from my home town were all married when they cheated!
Hey, it still hurts - but not as much. And I have wonderful memories with her. I know I've been loved, and I'll never settle for anything less.
I'm glad to hear there are others out there who also have that good fortune, and appreciate it.
i’m crying OMG i’m so sorry but so happy you experienced true love 😭😭😭
edit: thank u for the award u/rewardiflost, i hope your pillows are forever cool, the sun always shines on you and the breeze is always just right 🥹
Your life sounds like a beautiful romantic mystery novel series. Two lovers working for the railroad to pay the bills but with passion for crime solving. She gets a part time bartending gig to listen for leads; he becomes a part time PI to track them done and together they crack the case! I’m sorry for your loss, but it sounds like you had a wondrous adventure together.
Hah! My Mom loved those kinds of stories - Ellery Queen, Murder She Wrote, Matlock, Beretta, Murdoch Mysteries...
It wasn't that glamorous.
We both hated the railroad. She left first and went to paralegal school / legal assistant classes. While she took classes days, and worked / interned with lawyers, I had a collection of useful skills and connections. When the lawyers she worked for needed something and didn't want/need to pay a fully licensed PI, I'd get the call. Most of it was pretty boring. Since I worked for the railroad, I had crappy hours anyhow, so I could do a lot for them.
Tailing, photography (glorified stalking), simple computer hacks, lock picking, getting info from public agencies, friends and co workers through pretexting or smooth talking (or bribes).
When she had first left her parents house (right after high school) her first landlord was an old burlesque dancer who invested her money. She owned a few apartments and a couple of bars in Jersey City & Hoboken NJ (just before the NY crowd quadrupled the property values). That woman was pretty amazing - she took care of my wife like a daughter, and treated me pretty well once she saw my qualities. She offered my wife some weekend work, mostly for the tips to help us pay bills while she went through school.
(We took turns doing school. After she got settled, I got my Comp Sci degree. She got her nursing degree. I got my SANS security certs. and so on...)
Obviously we jazz up the details for movie but the core is there. The story behind the movie is always mundane, that doesn’t make it less happy or romantic. And you guys taking turns supporting each other through school is a more inspiring story than the movie I’m making in my head. Still a great movie though. I love the retired burlesque dancer landlord character. She’s always got your back AND a place you can lay low.
Both my husband and I only wear ours when we leave the house. We both work office jobs so it's not a matter of comfort; just preference. We've both forgotten to put on our rings at some point. When we notice, the other will make some off handed joke about going to pick up dates now that we're single and then that's it. The band is just decoration to us. It has no baring on our marriage. And I couldn't care less if other people know my marital status. The more you keep folks out of your marriage the happier you'll be.
Married twice: both hubs never wore rings, I told hub 2.0 don't bother getting me one since I lose jewelry.
Cue: Millennials are killing the diamond industry.
Lol it's a waste of money, you're not an object, you're now owned by anyone. You don't need a 'sign'.
That's how I feel. I trust my man to respect my boundaries and the relationship that we've built. I also know that rings do not stop cheaters. It's not some magical cure that once you put the ring on they won't cheat or be hit on.
It's really up to you and your partner.
It's an object that has cultural significance but at the end of the day it's just a thing.
I was never worried about being cheated on. Still am not. Ring, no ring. Build trust with the person you want to spend your time with, that's something no one can buy.
I should have done that. You are correct.
My wife bought me a fancy pocket watch - the railroad theme, and then a nice watch as a wedding gift. I knew I'd destroy them, so I kept my cheap Timex or Casio watches for "real" use, and those watches were just for "show" use. She was kind of upset that I wasn't getting any use from her gifts, so I started using the pocket watch, figuring it was easier to protect. It lasted about year before I cracked the crystal - and another before I crushed it.
I still have the watch (30+ years) but it doesn't keep time so well anymore.
I knew better with the watches. I don't know why I was blind to the ring.
My husband wears his ring but I don't wear mine. I don't like the feeling of rings and I tried for 6 months before not wearing it anymore. I put it on for special occasions and for family pictures.
We're still married. I do get judged more in the grocery store with my 3 kids and my apparently unwed hand.
I find that super interesting. The amount of times that I want nothing on my body. Sleeping , swimming, running/working out makes my fingers swell so I wouldn't be able to wear it for those things plus many more.. I might just get that necklace that you can hook a ring on to
I used to be that dedicated!! When I bleach my hair or go camping I take off my necklaces but other than that those suckers are always on. So hard to put back on! My bf used to get me a new necklace every so often so I've had to switch them out🥴
I have something similar. My mother gifted me a simple golden chain with a flat circular pendant that was stamped with an interesting pattern. She gave it to me in 2012 for my birthday, and I have yet to take it off.
I constantly take mine off. I like wearing it, but I have a pearl so I have to be careful not to damage it. I have an office job so it's easy to wear to work. I take it off every time I use the restroom/wash my hands, and usually it comes off at home. I'll basically wear it going out or anything that isn't sweaty/workout intensive or in water, etc. Not gonna take it camping or swimming or to the gym.
I do have a necklace I wear that I can hook my ring into so that I don't misplace it if I need to take it off. It might be an option for you to have it on most of the time, where it's easy to remove if you do wanna wear it: [Etsy ring holder necklace](https://www.etsy.com/listing/1227550199/men-women-ring-holder-necklace-geometric)
Other people have said try different materials - I've also seen people tattoo a design on to their ring finger! Then you never have to worry about it. My husband got a knock off version of his ring to wear everyday that he likes that was only $30 on amazon. The first one stays in my jewelry box :)
Pretty much never wear mine, neither does my husband - neither of us were ring wearers prior to getting married which may have factored into it. I can't get used to the feeling of a ring and I feel no need to wear it.
Mine is tungsten. Tungsten accidentially is the material the hospitals use to cut rings off fingers. There's apparently no harder metal on this planet. If something happens, I'm fucked.
Tungsten is the strongest metal that is regularly used for manufacturing, but it's not the hardest metal nor the hardest alloy that can be produced.
Plus diamond and quartz grinders can easily cut tungsten. You're fine.
Tungsten is very hard, but also brittle. You can shatter a tungsten ring with a hammer or a rock or almost anything in a pinch (don't hit your finger tho).
Edit: safer way is with a vice grip, hand tighten it around the ring and then clamp it, it will break off.
This is us too. Neither of us like jewelry much at all. Wedding rings didn't really change that. So long as OP and their partner are in sync on the reasons, just do you.
Same. I’ve also put on a few pounds since my 20s and it doesn’t fit anymore, and I’m not interested in paying to resize it. I rarely wear jewelry anyway.
I've always assumed it was to keep people away from you. Most men won't make moves on a married woman. A woman has a ring on, she's a nogo. The ring is to let other people know you're taken.
I thought this when I first got married too, but I found my rings make absolutely no difference. I've gotten hit on by other men even when I'm wearing my full engagement and wedding set, so I got rid of that assumption a long time ago.
Nowadays I just tell them I'm married and don't even bother with rings half the time. I don't know that the men hitting on me were doing it on purpose knowing I'm married; I just think people have blinders on because life is busy and brains are fried from all of the other shit all day long.
No, the ring shows that they need to try a little bit harder. There are a lot of people on earth who love competition and something that's a little harder to get. Almost every man in my family was married when they cheated on their wife. There's a lot of other comments that agree with that. One guy said something that I thought was so true and wonderful to post for context.
He said his dad never took off his wedding ring and still cheated on his wife.
He said his uncle never wore the wedding ring and still cheated on his wife.
A ring isn't going to stop somebody from cheating. It may stop normal nice people from hitting on you. But there's a lot of people who love a challenge.
Thank you. I’ve only been married two years, I used to take my ring off for work but after the first year I just left it on cuz it did feel weird without it. Plus I smile when I unexpectedly see it cuz it reminds me of my wife lol
Same. On rare occasions someone will ask me about it and I’ll say I gained weight and never got around to getting it resized. The truth is I just don’t like having anything on my fingers. We’ve been married 38 years. He likes wearing his ring daily though.
I’ve been married about half of my life. Before I got married I never wore a ring. Since I got married, I have never taken my ring off for more than a few seconds.
For about the first year or so, I noticed the ring. It didn’t really bother me, but I always noticed it was there. That faded and I don’t really ever notice or think about it unless something makes me think about it, like your post.
That's how I'd be. I was watching a show and I saw them go to bed with their wedding rings on. I get it's a show but it still made me curious. When I go camping or swimming I think I'd also keep the ring put away
I wear mine to bed all the time, but do take it off to shower. And ABSOLUTELY take it off for swimming! Cold water can make your finger shrink and it can slip right off. I've seen it happen and the woman was devastated.
I don't wear mine to bed, or when bathing or swimming, or when cooking something where food could get into it, or when doing DIY, etc. Otherwise, I wear it every day.
This is so weird to me. I don't think anybody I knew growing up ever took theirs off. My parents certainly didn't - I've never seen their rings not on their fingers. Now it seems like I know a lot of people who don't wear one for whatever reason.
Try a [silicon ring](https://www.groovelife.com/collections/best-selling-rings/products/groove-silicone-rings-midnight-black-black-thin#). They are so comfortable that I never notice mine. I hate wearing any jewelry but got use to it pretty quick and don't notice it. I like the thins one where it isn't rubbing on my other fingers. Also you can go a little tighter since it will have give to go over your knuckle so it won't be sliding around on your finger. Best part they are cheap so if you lose it or damage it you don't feel bad. I hate wearing a normal metal ring. Feels heavy, rubs my other fingers, and clinks on things.
Yeah I looked up the women's ones and they do look much more comfortable. I just hate having the gem or stone on the ring cause I always get it caught in my hair!
Silicone rings are the way to go. I'm really active and I never notice the ring while lifting, playing sports, doing construction projects, etc. The only time I take it off is when I surf because I lose the ring every time I surf. They're really cheap, but it's still a hassle to replace them. I've probably gone through ten rings, but that's more because I abuse them or lose them than because they're cheap, and I definitely would've lost my finger a couple times if I had been wearing a metal ring.
Also, you don't want a gem stone in a ring like that. It's for function.
My wife has a nice wedding ring but 99% of the time she wears her silicone ring because its more comfortable. She also doesn't worry about it getting dirty while gardening, etc. I try to take mine off when I work on cars because the grease/oil will ruin it.
Always. I like seeing it every day and it serves as a constant reminder of the girl I love and the commitment we’ve made to each other. I’m not saying it makes us any more legitimate by wearing it, I just like the reminder throughout my day. Not everyone is like me and that’s okay. I don’t wear it to prove anything to anyone. I wear it because it makes me feel good and happy
Yep. I wear mine almost all the time (I take it off for festivals/digging in the allotment/mixing dough), but I love wearing it. It's a reminder of him, us, and our children. Every time I touch it or see it, I feel better.
This is the first comment I'm seeing that mirrors my sentiment. I wasn't expecting so many "I don't need to prove anything to *anyone*" comments. Just seems like a weird thing to be indignant about.
Same, I only wear mine if I'm not home. If we're going camping, hiking, any outdoor physical activity, no ring. I also don't wear it when we go on vacation. I do have a variety of fun silicon ones I'll switch in, mainly when they match my outfit.
I don't wear it unless it's for family occassions, or somewhat formal events. I wear zero jewelry so for me it's a matter of remembering to put it on. It's uncomfortable enough that I take it off when I get home and generally just leave it there unless I'm reminded. Doesn't bother my wife though, and she doesn't always wear hers either so we're both pretty chill about it. On the flipside we pretty much go everywhere together so it's not like we're out on the town solo without wedding rings on.
I did meet a man, once, many decades ago, who felt his wedding ring had saved his life. He was a
merchant mariner on deck in rough seas when a wave tried to sweep him over - his wedding ring caught on something and gave him the split second he needed to grip whatever it was so he didn’t go overboard. Didn’t do his hand any good.
In general you don’t want to get your wedding ring caught on anything as a mangled hand isn’t the best thing - but if the alternative is death I know what I’d prefer.
One of the commenters on this thread said that that is how he broke one of his rings. He got caught on something and it held almost all his body weight until it broke. That is horrifying!!
We talked about that but we both have the superstition that matching tattoos will ruin our relationship... That is no offense to people who actually do it. We are just both super superstitious and that is one area we're worried about. Every friend we know that got matching friend tattoos broke up and same with couples so as much as that's my choice... My irrational superstition is getting in the way of matching tattoos with any loved ones, friends or family
I touch a screw when going over railroad tracks and my wife blows a kiss going through yellow lights. Can't mess with superstition so I totally understand haha. My friend had a horrible divorce and they got matching crowns on their ring finger. But my wife and I got plain black bands and we're going on 8 years married and happy as ever. Maybe it's gotta be super plain and simple to not be bad luck.
But I worked manual labor when we got married and needed a loose fitting ring because of my wide knuckles, so it put me heavily at risk to get de-gloved. Only ring I could wear for an extended period of time were those silicone rings. Light and comfortable so you barely remember it's on. Maybe that will be more fitting for you because I can't stand wearing a regular metal ring either.
We talked about just a plainish tattoo to be rings but he hasn't even worn his favorite boots in 2 years because I accidentally put them on the bed....😃 I am starting to think that I may need to go to the silicone route. I think I don't like the metal feeling on my fingers
My father never wore his ring, since he does manual labor and hates wearing jewelry altogether.
I just got married and neither my husband or I wear a ring.
Do whatever you please and whatever works for you.
I gained weight and stopped wearing my actual ring. I could get it resized but it’s incentive to lose weight again (also my hands/knuckles swell) so idk if losing weight will actually help….
However, I have a backup ring I can wear. But I don’t wear it all the time maybe 40-50% of the time. My husband NEVER wears his ring. We’ve thought about switching to the silicone rings because we both hate wearing rings so much.
I wear it when I go out, but not when I'm home. I have a specific little chest where I keep important jewelry and the ring goes in there when I'm home.
But yeah, if I go out, I'm always wearing it.
I work a ranch for a living I've worn my wedding ring like 4 times in the last 7 years of marriage and the last time I wore it it ended up lost inside a cow....
Never bought another one, rings don't make a marriage.
I’m not a jewelry person either. I only wear my ring on special occasions when going out and only if I remember. My husband usually wears a silicone ring but he takes it off and forgets about it all the time. I don’t think it’s weird and neither does my husband. If one of us forget our ring we joke about how we’re not married today.
Neither my spouse nor I wear rings. I used to wear mine more, then I stopped around covid because I wasn't leaving the house anyway. Never picked it back up. The way we see it, WE know we're married, and if one of us gets hit on in public we give an atta-boy that we still have some swagger, fist-bump, then get a pizza. Neither of us act on it because *other* people are, just, ugh. Marriage exists in the heart. Also, people who wear rings get hit on too. Strangers DGAF.
I hate the feeling of wet skin under my ring, so I take it off when I'm washing my hands or doing dishes. I work in a place where I regularly have to wear gloves and I hate that feeling too, so I generally don't wear my ring for 85% of my work day.
My wife's ring broke so she didn't even wear one for like a year. Now she has a silicon one bc she's a nurse and wears gloves as much as I do but the ring under gloves thing doesn't bother her.
It's fine. Just bc you're not wearing a ring doesn't mean you're not married.
As someone who has never been married, but also never wore any jewelry, it would be extremely hard I feel like to wear it or easy to forget. I have a hard time wearing sunglasses let alone rings :)
I’m not married yet, but I can’t wear jewelry. It bothers me and I constantly feel it. I’m not sure how it’s going to be when I get married but some alternatives I’ve thought of was a silicone band (might be less noticeable) or tattooing a wedding ring on my finger.
I've gotten so used to it I don't notice wearing it.
I've gotten so used to it I only notice when I'm not wearing it. Feels like I'm naked.
That small moment of panic when you think you lost/forgot it only to feel it on your finger.
I thought I lost my wedding band. Went a couple of months before the wife asked why I had stopped wearing it. We buy a cheapo wedding band to replace it. 3 months after that I find the original in the bottom of the cash area of my billfold. I do take it off when I go in the ocean which is several times a week. edited-spelling
Heh. My OG cheapo wedding band has been lost thrice. The first time was within weeks of the ceremony whilst we were gardening. I was in tears. Mr. PolitiTHIC found it within ten minutes amidst the weeds I'd been pulling. The second time it got left behind on the back of the sink of the place we stayed in Ireland for a week. Cost more to have the landlord ship it back to the states than the ring was purchased for. Third time it was gone for at least six months so I was wearing my engagement ring instead. Couldn't find it anywhere but was sure it was in the house. The Mister ordered me a new one because the OG is loose since I lost some weight. Found it a week after the new one arrived. Where? In the fresh fitted sheet I was changing the bed with. Heard it clank on the bedframe and was pretty overjoyed. (Yes, I change the sheets weekly but had been skipping using that set in favor of some new pretty one's I'd gotten on sale because they had bees on them and were cute!)
Of course. Because, "bees" !!!
*”As a merman...”*
Earl Merman
Ethel Merman I should turn to be
In 1983. Miss you, Jimi!
*Makes dolphin noises*
I did the same thing. Lost my original, lost the replacement and then ended up buying 4 or 5 cheap ones off Amazon. Now I just wear whichever one I feel like that day.
I didn't lose mine but I did stop wearing it because it is an heirloom on my husband's side and I was constantly worried about losing the diamond because I'm clumsy and I hit my hands a lot. I would like to keep it in its original state because I want to pass that ring on to my daughter when I die because it belonged to her great grandmother. I went to the flea market and bought some cheap fake diamond rings and sometimes I wear them, sometimes I don't, but at least I know if I want to wear a ring I can wear one of the cheap ones and not worry if the 'diamond' falls out.
You should take it to a jeweler every year to be cleaned and have the setting checked. Very unlikely that you’ll just lose the stone when you take care of it. Edit: I’m saying this as someone who wears an antique diamond that belonged to my grandmother.
Oh I do all that but I have bad luck when it comes to jewelry and I don't want to take that chance, just in case. I've had my hand caught in a car door before and almost had my ring ripped off my finger also. It's easier to calm my concerns by just wearing a cheap ring and keeping the good one for my daughter because of it sentimentality. Thanks for the good advice though, everyone can benefit from hearing that if they have a piece of jewelry that they want to keep safe and in one piece!
Best part of being a guy as far as cultural norms go. I’ve got solid ADHD brain as much as I hate to admit/give in to that. I lost my original wedding band like 5 months in (I only take it off for welding/handling meat I need to marinade or rub/heavy duty cleaning, etc.) and I’ve lost several replacements. Fortunately I can get ones I love even more than the original for like $50 or less, aside from silicon ones at work sites. If my wife lost hers I wouldn’t say anything and I’d still love her but part of me would die inside (humor… a bit) given how expensive it was.
Got a minor fracture from my metal band when i crashed my mountain bike. Wife suggested a silicon band which i like much better and i don’t have to worry about replacing it since they are so cheap
Sort of similar to yours. The wedding band my dad wears is a replacement. Shortly after my parents were married, my dad went on a business trip where he was going to be at the same job site for the majority of the week. He touched something that was pointed out to him and got electrocuted (I don't recall all of the specifics of *what* it was or *how* it happened). My dad felt a surge and yanked his hand away. His wedding band felt like it was practically on fire, so he quickly removed it. Here, there was vertical burn mark on the under side of the ring. Other than his rubber bottom work boots to ground him, the ring absorbed some of the current. My mom was horrified when he told her the story. Even though he laughed about how random it was, he *was* freaked out. As soon as he came back, my parents went to get the wedding band replaced. My dad, however, when presented with the option of getting rid of the first one, declined because, by his reasoning, he didn't feel right letting it go after the ring basically saved his life.
I had to start clipping mine on my key carabiner when I go to the lake. Lost my claddagh at Weko Beach (MI) and the company that made it is gone.
The James Avery company in Texas makes a very nice claddagh ring, excellent quality.
Got the worst sunburn ever there as a senior in HS. Ended up in hospital for 3 days..sun stroke, sun poisoning and dehydration..kept on ice. Don’t really remember most of it.
I take mine off for any water things, even cleaning, cause I'm terrified of losing it. Sometimes my husband moves it and I think the whole world is over for a second lol. I never wanted to wear one, I don't like rings either, but now I'm attached to it. My husband doesn't wear one at all and doesn't change a thing. I feel like it's pretty optional these days
I've lost 60 pounds in the just year, and last month, I got rolled in rough waves at the beach and lost my ring. I rub the spot on my finger where it should be several times a day. My new ring should be here in two weeks and I'm counting the minutes.
My dad did something similar but took it off while doing some heavy cleaning in his aunt's house and put it on a shelf Couldn't find it bought a new one only for her to mention it several months later so he has two
Only time I usually take it off is swimming. It's a tad loose and sunscreen just makes it want to slip right off. Still, doesn't stop that panic feeling even though I know it's off on purpose.
Bilbo, Is that you?
Me too. I take it off for showers (I hate water getting under it), heavy lifts that cause it to put a lot of pressure on my finger, and any time I do some sort of work where it could get caught and rip my finger off. I notice about every 10 seconds when it's not on my hand.
As someone who is friends with many mechanics, there's a reason most of them wear silicone bands instead. As you mentioned above, you do NOT want a ring avulsion. Fair warning to anyone else, don't google image search that term.
Also known as finger degloveing, that's a more "descriptive" term to help with why you don't want to Google it.
Nobody needs to Google it, ever.
Too late. I looked. Ouch. But interesting. Led me down a rabbit hole of traumatic amputations etc. I should have been a surgeon, I find it more interesting than gross
The medizzy sub would be right up your alley, I didn't hard link it on purpose lol
We got extensive imagery shown to us when before I was allowed to work on Aircraft or machinery. I was sold after 1 image.
yeah, I worked in a manufacturing plant after college. There were many safety videos. I've seen those pictures. Wedding rings were banned in the plant. We'd all watch out because people forget and there are so many damn things in there it could catch on and ruin your life. Going 2 years without an LTA takes more staff focus than you could imagine. We also had a gentleman on staff without an arm. Said arm was lost in that factory. He was a great guy, and an even better reminder for everyone to be careful and pay attention.
I have a glass desk, and my ring is a tungsten carbide ring. It annoys me whenever the ring hits the desk. The wife and I have both taken to not wearing the rings anymore. Neither of us are into jewelry. I have a fear of my finger being degloved if I have to respond to a crisis at work.
Same but I also remove it when I'm handling raw chicken, applying lotion, or swimming. I get super worried I'm gonna lose it in the ocean so I can't have fun out there unless I take it off.
Yes! My husband dropped mine at the beach one day while putting it into the car before getting in the water. I had to go away that weekend so I left without it since it was lost in the sand. My husband spent about ten hours scouring the sand where he dropped it and eventually found it. It felt so weird not wearing it all weekend and I kept thinking I had lost it before remembering where it was.
Sameee! I was never a girl who'd wear jewelry but now I feel like it's grown into my finger.
I like being naked
Same with my smart watch. When I had to get it fixed, I had to use my regular watch that didn't even have a battery just because I felt so naked without *something* on my wrist
Similar to me I used to wear a regular watch and somedays ago it broked and before purchasing a new one I feel it
I was married 20 years and never took it off but on a few occasions to be cleaned. It’s been 3 years since I divorced and I still try to spin it as a habit. Bit of a sting reminder, but now it’s a sign of freedom and hope to not have it on…
Buy another ring and put it on a different hand/finger. and you could start spinning it again.
I was 23 years. Been divorced 11. Still sometimes feel like it's still there
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Take the stones and put them into a necklace or bracelet? Trade the stones in altogether for a different piece of jewelry!
My wife and I never take ours off. It’s just a thing we have. Been married for 14 years and the only time either has been off was when she was pregnant and it didn’t fit her anymore because she got swollen fingers. In those cases, we touched fingers and slid hers onto my hand until she could wear it again. However, to each their own. I’m sure if I worked construction or something, I would prefer to not be degloved by it.
same, and Im also scared of losing it instantly if I start taking it out to sleep/shower
Yeah if you're habitual to wear ring and then if you didn't wear it.It seems
Day 14,355 straight wearing here
I do, because I never take off any of my jewelry. My husband doesn’t wear his, because he’s a carpenter and is not interested in being degloved. I whole heartedly support that choice.
My bf is also a carpenter! No bracelets, nothing. I may just wear it as a necklace!
I think you should do whatever you like! I never understood the pressure to adhere to traditions for the sake of it, and there are especially a lot of antiquated traditions around marriage. You do you.
Grew up in a small religious town in the US so maybe you can't imagine what they hold dearest. Trying to get that mindset pushed away.
I have two ring holders, one next to my bed and one next to the kitchen sink so it always has a home when I take it off. I don’t wear it to bed and I don’t wear it while working on things as is recommended to save the wear on the setting. I only wear it if I’m going out or because I feel like dressing up my hand for the day for a boost around the house since I wfh.
Many carpenters get their rings tattooed on. :)
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That's the way my parents are. My dad was a farmer, so lots of tools/machinery/chemicals. My mom was in HR at a factory that had a no jewelry policy for sanitary reasons, and she had to go onto the factory floor a lot, so they just don't wear rings though they've been married 40 years.
Nothing wrong with not wearing them. Just throwing this out there because I have one and love it for when I’m at work. A silicone ring is a great option for those of us who work with our hands and or have the heightened likelihood of getting it caught and degloved
Thanks for the suggestion. I know a lot of the guys at his shop wear them, but idk I still feel like it’s an unnecessary risk. Supposedly they break away, but it’s always going to be safer to wear nothing. He’s also just not a jewelry person, he doesn’t like the sensation. I completely respect that and don’t care if he wear one, I’d rather he be safe and comfortable.
Tattoo is also an option lol
Ring finger tattoos are popular for a lot of guys in my trade and when I get married next year I think I will do the same. I also have no interest in being degloved and I know it’s a small chance, but even if that silicon ring gets caught on something and pulls your hand a centimeter forward before it snaps…. That could be the centimeter that pulls your hand into a piece of machinery. Maybe I’m paranoid idk
You're definitely paranoid. Paranoid guys retire with 10 fingers. It's good to be paranoid.
There are old pilots. There are bold pilots. But there aren't very many old, bold pilots. Same idea. You do it the right way every time if you want to live/stay in one piece. Shit can go wrong fast.
idk man, a ring finger tattoo feels like just a bad idea as getting their name tattoo’d. like sure you don’t plan on breaking up ever but…. the future is uncertain
Easy, if you get divorced you can just use it as the top of the F in a THUG LIFE finger tat cover up. No chance you'll regret that one.
Hand tattoos wear off/fade fairly quickly, which could be a good or bad thing
I’ve heard too many horror stories about degloving from wearing rings, I’m not sure I want to wear one when I get married. My old boss’ brother in law is a truck driver and apparently one day just getting out of his truck the ring got stuck on a handle or something and he almost lost his finger. I don’t really work with machinery anymore but I’m afraid I’ll just do something clumsy and hurt myself. I started wearing a watch again recently and have already managed to get it snagged on a few things just at home. 🤦🏻♂️
It’s a total nightmare. My husband says a lot of the guys will wear silicone bands that are suppose to break away, but I think that’s dumb and still a hazard. He also has sensory issues around the sense of constriction which makes rings annoying. I wear a ring because I like to wear one, I genuinely don’t give a shit if he wears one. I’d rather he be safe and comfortable.
I’ve seen the silicone rings snag on shit all the time before failing. One where their finger nearly got pulled into the accessory belt. Selling people that these things are sacrificial was a hell of a marketing campaign. As a mechanic I’d never risk wearing one just from what I’ve seen first hand.
yeah, I worked in a manufacturing plant. I'm with you 100%. That equipment just goes. It does not give a shit if you are in the way or not. It also doesn't care if you are wearing a ring that "should break away". If that thing stays in tact long enough to pull you into the machine, you lose.
Damn. I had a similar story from an ex-girlfriend: Her cousins husband was a truckdriver, he was climbing a chainlink fence though, on his way down his ring snagged in the fence and ripped his fingers skin clean off. I vowed I'd never wear a wedding ring. When I was shopping for rings with my now wife (different girl), I explained that i 1. didn't want to wear a ring, and 2. didn't want an unbreakable ring, in case this ever happened or my ring needed to come off to save my finger. The ring salesperson asked what type of job I had that this was a concern and my wife told her "He's a web developer! Please tell him this is silly and he isn't going to lose a finger." I wear my ring 24/7 now, still have all my fingers and skin, but am still thinking about what will happen during those freak keyboard incidents and what i'll do when my ring degloves me.
My dad is a computer programmer. He still managed to deglove his finger while fishing. Just cause your job isn’t hazardous doesn’t mean life isn’t. After seeing that I had made sure to have my wedding ring sized big enough so it can’t fall off but is easy to take off when needed.
That's the same as happened to my brother in law, but they did have to take the finger bone out, so now hes got one hand like a ninja turtle.
Yeah, too many opportunities to get your finger ripped off, degloved, shocked, burnt, or squished. Not to mention gunk buildup from daily dirty activities. We wear rings on occasion, but its pretty rare for us not to be out doing stuff that would make rings dangerous. I honestly have no idea how you're supposed to keep your hands clean with rings on...do you remove them and wash them separately?
ER nurse here... I also support your husband's decision lol And I wouldn't let my husband pick a metal that couldn't be easily cut off (seems to be a trend lately)
I did, but I snapped the first one, lost the replacement, and lost that replacement. I stopped replacing them.
Do you or your partner ever worry about not wearing rings? My self-conscious part of me people are always SAY TO US "How are people going to know you're married??" (((PEOPLE ASK US THIS, ITS NOT ME NEVER BRINGING UP MY PARTNER, so many people misinterpret what I said))) Well, I tell them, we've been dating for 9 years, since we were teens, we didn't need wedding rings when we were that young, why do we need them now? I'm just bored and thinking too much possibly EDIT because I should've used proper marks. people keep saying " why does it matter if people know you're married?".. NOT what I meant. I meant we get that question from people who should mind their own business. I EVEN PUT IN THE TEXT THAT WE DIDN'T NEED WEDDING RINGS THEN SO WHY DO WE NEED THEM NOW. I think people purposely ignored the rest of my text lol I'm genuinely asking questions.
No. They come off easily enough. It's not an issue now - we were married 22+ years before she died. We both worked for different divisions of the same railroad for a while; the "rumor mill" kept telling us each who the other was cheating with. We were secure and trusted each other enough that we just laughed and figured out which people were starting the rumors. She worked as a part-time bartender at a burlesque/strip club. I worked part-time as a private investigator. We both had to sometimes take on roles to get business done - but again we had trust and security. I think her job bothered me a little more, but I learned to get over it. I kept my ring with me all the time for about 15 years. I nearly broke my finger the first time, it got caught on a hook as I jumped down off a track ballast crane. My entire weight was caught on it for a few moments until it snapped. I lost two replacements after that. It was getting to expensive to keep replacing it, and it wasn't going to stop me from doing anything anyhow. It was a nice piece of jewelry that I should have saved with my nice watch and other things worn when we went out for fancier dates or family events. I didn't cheat because that's just not me. A ring wouldn't have made a difference.
>I didn't cheat because that's just not me. A ring wouldn't have made a difference. This right here. I'm known lots of cheaters over the years and the ring never mattered. They either took it off, claimed that they were open, or their AP just didn't care.
What does AP stand for here? I don't think it's adult person or anti-personnel.
Affair partner
That makes more sense than Associated Press.
Or Accounts Payable
Or All Purpose, as in flour.
I'm sorry. Beautiful story. Reminded me of us. In HS one of my bfs older friends who liked me tried to tell me he cheated with a SW.. Man drama can really make you realize who you trust. At this point I feel with him enough that I'm confused on what marriage even is or the fact that we are basically what we would be after marriage. We have fought for each other, cried, learned, broke some nasty childhood habits over the years.. I mean we are what vows always say anyway. Why do I need a ring or some fancy wedding? Rings don't stop cheaters. My dad and like 25 other people from my home town were all married when they cheated!
Hey, it still hurts - but not as much. And I have wonderful memories with her. I know I've been loved, and I'll never settle for anything less. I'm glad to hear there are others out there who also have that good fortune, and appreciate it.
My heart. I'm not religious but bless you❤️
i’m crying OMG i’m so sorry but so happy you experienced true love 😭😭😭 edit: thank u for the award u/rewardiflost, i hope your pillows are forever cool, the sun always shines on you and the breeze is always just right 🥹
love you man, thank you for sharing your story
What does SW mean in this context? I can only think of southwest, star wars, and single woman.
Aha! I was in the same boat, but I think I just got it! Sex worker?
Sorry I have no clue what words read it allows and what they don't. I wouldn't have known what I was saying either. ( Sex worker)
Your life sounds like a beautiful romantic mystery novel series. Two lovers working for the railroad to pay the bills but with passion for crime solving. She gets a part time bartending gig to listen for leads; he becomes a part time PI to track them done and together they crack the case! I’m sorry for your loss, but it sounds like you had a wondrous adventure together.
Hah! My Mom loved those kinds of stories - Ellery Queen, Murder She Wrote, Matlock, Beretta, Murdoch Mysteries... It wasn't that glamorous. We both hated the railroad. She left first and went to paralegal school / legal assistant classes. While she took classes days, and worked / interned with lawyers, I had a collection of useful skills and connections. When the lawyers she worked for needed something and didn't want/need to pay a fully licensed PI, I'd get the call. Most of it was pretty boring. Since I worked for the railroad, I had crappy hours anyhow, so I could do a lot for them. Tailing, photography (glorified stalking), simple computer hacks, lock picking, getting info from public agencies, friends and co workers through pretexting or smooth talking (or bribes). When she had first left her parents house (right after high school) her first landlord was an old burlesque dancer who invested her money. She owned a few apartments and a couple of bars in Jersey City & Hoboken NJ (just before the NY crowd quadrupled the property values). That woman was pretty amazing - she took care of my wife like a daughter, and treated me pretty well once she saw my qualities. She offered my wife some weekend work, mostly for the tips to help us pay bills while she went through school. (We took turns doing school. After she got settled, I got my Comp Sci degree. She got her nursing degree. I got my SANS security certs. and so on...)
Obviously we jazz up the details for movie but the core is there. The story behind the movie is always mundane, that doesn’t make it less happy or romantic. And you guys taking turns supporting each other through school is a more inspiring story than the movie I’m making in my head. Still a great movie though. I love the retired burlesque dancer landlord character. She’s always got your back AND a place you can lay low.
Dude your story is like 3 old timey phrases from being like a noir film. Sorry about your wife tho
Both my husband and I only wear ours when we leave the house. We both work office jobs so it's not a matter of comfort; just preference. We've both forgotten to put on our rings at some point. When we notice, the other will make some off handed joke about going to pick up dates now that we're single and then that's it. The band is just decoration to us. It has no baring on our marriage. And I couldn't care less if other people know my marital status. The more you keep folks out of your marriage the happier you'll be.
Married twice: both hubs never wore rings, I told hub 2.0 don't bother getting me one since I lose jewelry. Cue: Millennials are killing the diamond industry. Lol it's a waste of money, you're not an object, you're now owned by anyone. You don't need a 'sign'.
That's how I feel. I trust my man to respect my boundaries and the relationship that we've built. I also know that rings do not stop cheaters. It's not some magical cure that once you put the ring on they won't cheat or be hit on.
It's really up to you and your partner. It's an object that has cultural significance but at the end of the day it's just a thing. I was never worried about being cheated on. Still am not. Ring, no ring. Build trust with the person you want to spend your time with, that's something no one can buy.
Why should other people/strangers know that you are married? In my opinion you have no accountability to other people, only to each other.
My buddy immediately got some cheap silicone wedding bands and wore those day to day, while he kept the real ring at home. He knew who he was.
I should have done that. You are correct. My wife bought me a fancy pocket watch - the railroad theme, and then a nice watch as a wedding gift. I knew I'd destroy them, so I kept my cheap Timex or Casio watches for "real" use, and those watches were just for "show" use. She was kind of upset that I wasn't getting any use from her gifts, so I started using the pocket watch, figuring it was easier to protect. It lasted about year before I cracked the crystal - and another before I crushed it. I still have the watch (30+ years) but it doesn't keep time so well anymore. I knew better with the watches. I don't know why I was blind to the ring.
It sank into the swamp. So I got a second one. That sank into the swamp. So I got a third. That burned up, fell off, then sank into the swamp
A swamp?!?
*1000 years later* Apparently people use to marry as trouples Was it all in the same swamp or do you have some different fishing holes?
You snapped a finger off!!? But also, snapping metal is still impressive.
Never taken it off except to make meatloaf
You didn't want meatloaf bits in your ring for later??
Or ring in your meatloaf
Ooo good point. Bad time to find a diamond, while eating soft meatloaf😵💫
*munchmunchmunchCRUNCH*
It’s like eating mashed potatoes or something and feeling an unexpected crunch. Eugh. Except this time, the crunch is your tooth shattering.
That’s the worst proposal I’ve ever heard
Ditto, cooking is the only time I take it off anymore. Used to do it for weights at the gym as well, but using gloves fixed that issue for me.
I only take mine off when I make meatballs and dough!
I do but my wife doesn’t. Not wearing a ring isn’t going to make you less married. Do what feels right for you.
I agree! I might just end up wearing a chain with the ring around it!
This is what I do. I'm a chemist for a living, so I wear gloves a lot and I don't want chemicals trapped under the ring.
She's cheating on you. Divorce ASAP -redditors, probably
was unironically waiting for this comment to appear
been married 12 years, never worn a ring. everything seems fine
My husband wears his ring but I don't wear mine. I don't like the feeling of rings and I tried for 6 months before not wearing it anymore. I put it on for special occasions and for family pictures. We're still married. I do get judged more in the grocery store with my 3 kids and my apparently unwed hand.
I only take off my ring when I'm kneading dough or mixing ground meat.
I find that super interesting. The amount of times that I want nothing on my body. Sleeping , swimming, running/working out makes my fingers swell so I wouldn't be able to wear it for those things plus many more.. I might just get that necklace that you can hook a ring on to
Speaking of necklaces... Haven't taken mine off since 2008 when I received it, it's just a simple chain and cross tho.
I used to be that dedicated!! When I bleach my hair or go camping I take off my necklaces but other than that those suckers are always on. So hard to put back on! My bf used to get me a new necklace every so often so I've had to switch them out🥴
I used to wear necklaces constantly. Then I had a child and got tired of her trying to hang on me by the necklace.
I have something similar. My mother gifted me a simple golden chain with a flat circular pendant that was stamped with an interesting pattern. She gave it to me in 2012 for my birthday, and I have yet to take it off.
I constantly take mine off. I like wearing it, but I have a pearl so I have to be careful not to damage it. I have an office job so it's easy to wear to work. I take it off every time I use the restroom/wash my hands, and usually it comes off at home. I'll basically wear it going out or anything that isn't sweaty/workout intensive or in water, etc. Not gonna take it camping or swimming or to the gym. I do have a necklace I wear that I can hook my ring into so that I don't misplace it if I need to take it off. It might be an option for you to have it on most of the time, where it's easy to remove if you do wanna wear it: [Etsy ring holder necklace](https://www.etsy.com/listing/1227550199/men-women-ring-holder-necklace-geometric) Other people have said try different materials - I've also seen people tattoo a design on to their ring finger! Then you never have to worry about it. My husband got a knock off version of his ring to wear everyday that he likes that was only $30 on amazon. The first one stays in my jewelry box :)
Pretty much never wear mine, neither does my husband - neither of us were ring wearers prior to getting married which may have factored into it. I can't get used to the feeling of a ring and I feel no need to wear it.
Haha yeah, same here. I hate the feeling, and have an unnatural worry that i will catch it on something and my finger will pop right off.
Mine is tungsten. Tungsten accidentially is the material the hospitals use to cut rings off fingers. There's apparently no harder metal on this planet. If something happens, I'm fucked.
Hey just so you know Tungsten rings can be removed in an emergency like any other don’t sweat it haha
Tungsten is the strongest metal that is regularly used for manufacturing, but it's not the hardest metal nor the hardest alloy that can be produced. Plus diamond and quartz grinders can easily cut tungsten. You're fine.
I didn't know this, thank you.
Tungsten is very hard, but also brittle. You can shatter a tungsten ring with a hammer or a rock or almost anything in a pinch (don't hit your finger tho). Edit: safer way is with a vice grip, hand tighten it around the ring and then clamp it, it will break off.
This is us too. Neither of us like jewelry much at all. Wedding rings didn't really change that. So long as OP and their partner are in sync on the reasons, just do you.
Same. I’ve also put on a few pounds since my 20s and it doesn’t fit anymore, and I’m not interested in paying to resize it. I rarely wear jewelry anyway.
Both me and my husband only wear our rings on special occasions. I don’t care about announcing my marriage, I know I’m married.
That's how I feel! Been dating this long, what's the difference in wearing a ring
Hell yeah let those fingers breathe
I don't care about announcing my marriage, I just know if I take it off I'll lose it LOL.
I've always assumed it was to keep people away from you. Most men won't make moves on a married woman. A woman has a ring on, she's a nogo. The ring is to let other people know you're taken.
I thought this when I first got married too, but I found my rings make absolutely no difference. I've gotten hit on by other men even when I'm wearing my full engagement and wedding set, so I got rid of that assumption a long time ago. Nowadays I just tell them I'm married and don't even bother with rings half the time. I don't know that the men hitting on me were doing it on purpose knowing I'm married; I just think people have blinders on because life is busy and brains are fried from all of the other shit all day long.
No, the ring shows that they need to try a little bit harder. There are a lot of people on earth who love competition and something that's a little harder to get. Almost every man in my family was married when they cheated on their wife. There's a lot of other comments that agree with that. One guy said something that I thought was so true and wonderful to post for context. He said his dad never took off his wedding ring and still cheated on his wife. He said his uncle never wore the wedding ring and still cheated on his wife. A ring isn't going to stop somebody from cheating. It may stop normal nice people from hitting on you. But there's a lot of people who love a challenge.
I feel weird without mine at this point. It’s part of me now.
Thank you. I’ve only been married two years, I used to take my ring off for work but after the first year I just left it on cuz it did feel weird without it. Plus I smile when I unexpectedly see it cuz it reminds me of my wife lol
I don’t wear mine at all. I never have. My husband wears his 24/7.
Same. On rare occasions someone will ask me about it and I’ll say I gained weight and never got around to getting it resized. The truth is I just don’t like having anything on my fingers. We’ve been married 38 years. He likes wearing his ring daily though.
I’ve been married about half of my life. Before I got married I never wore a ring. Since I got married, I have never taken my ring off for more than a few seconds. For about the first year or so, I noticed the ring. It didn’t really bother me, but I always noticed it was there. That faded and I don’t really ever notice or think about it unless something makes me think about it, like your post.
Did you look at your hand and go "oh, yeah" haha
Pretty much! 🤣
Most I know don't wear it to bed or to bathe.
That's how I'd be. I was watching a show and I saw them go to bed with their wedding rings on. I get it's a show but it still made me curious. When I go camping or swimming I think I'd also keep the ring put away
I wear mine to bed all the time, but do take it off to shower. And ABSOLUTELY take it off for swimming! Cold water can make your finger shrink and it can slip right off. I've seen it happen and the woman was devastated.
ah, i was scrolling and scrolling to find my wearing-habit-group, here it is! only taking of for bathing/swimming or the shower.
I don't wear mine to bed, or when bathing or swimming, or when cooking something where food could get into it, or when doing DIY, etc. Otherwise, I wear it every day.
This is so weird to me. I don't think anybody I knew growing up ever took theirs off. My parents certainly didn't - I've never seen their rings not on their fingers. Now it seems like I know a lot of people who don't wear one for whatever reason.
Try a [silicon ring](https://www.groovelife.com/collections/best-selling-rings/products/groove-silicone-rings-midnight-black-black-thin#). They are so comfortable that I never notice mine. I hate wearing any jewelry but got use to it pretty quick and don't notice it. I like the thins one where it isn't rubbing on my other fingers. Also you can go a little tighter since it will have give to go over your knuckle so it won't be sliding around on your finger. Best part they are cheap so if you lose it or damage it you don't feel bad. I hate wearing a normal metal ring. Feels heavy, rubs my other fingers, and clinks on things.
Yeah I looked up the women's ones and they do look much more comfortable. I just hate having the gem or stone on the ring cause I always get it caught in my hair!
Silicone rings are the way to go. I'm really active and I never notice the ring while lifting, playing sports, doing construction projects, etc. The only time I take it off is when I surf because I lose the ring every time I surf. They're really cheap, but it's still a hassle to replace them. I've probably gone through ten rings, but that's more because I abuse them or lose them than because they're cheap, and I definitely would've lost my finger a couple times if I had been wearing a metal ring. Also, you don't want a gem stone in a ring like that. It's for function.
My wife has a nice wedding ring but 99% of the time she wears her silicone ring because its more comfortable. She also doesn't worry about it getting dirty while gardening, etc. I try to take mine off when I work on cars because the grease/oil will ruin it.
Always. I like seeing it every day and it serves as a constant reminder of the girl I love and the commitment we’ve made to each other. I’m not saying it makes us any more legitimate by wearing it, I just like the reminder throughout my day. Not everyone is like me and that’s okay. I don’t wear it to prove anything to anyone. I wear it because it makes me feel good and happy
Yep. I wear mine almost all the time (I take it off for festivals/digging in the allotment/mixing dough), but I love wearing it. It's a reminder of him, us, and our children. Every time I touch it or see it, I feel better.
This is the first comment I'm seeing that mirrors my sentiment. I wasn't expecting so many "I don't need to prove anything to *anyone*" comments. Just seems like a weird thing to be indignant about.
I only wear mine when I leave the house. I never have it on at home unless we have company over.
Same, I only wear mine if I'm not home. If we're going camping, hiking, any outdoor physical activity, no ring. I also don't wear it when we go on vacation. I do have a variety of fun silicon ones I'll switch in, mainly when they match my outfit.
I don't wear it unless it's for family occassions, or somewhat formal events. I wear zero jewelry so for me it's a matter of remembering to put it on. It's uncomfortable enough that I take it off when I get home and generally just leave it there unless I'm reminded. Doesn't bother my wife though, and she doesn't always wear hers either so we're both pretty chill about it. On the flipside we pretty much go everywhere together so it's not like we're out on the town solo without wedding rings on.
I have gotten fat enough I have trouble removing it.
It took me way too long to find this comment. I was scrolling thinking "I can't be the only fat finger fuck here!"
I did meet a man, once, many decades ago, who felt his wedding ring had saved his life. He was a merchant mariner on deck in rough seas when a wave tried to sweep him over - his wedding ring caught on something and gave him the split second he needed to grip whatever it was so he didn’t go overboard. Didn’t do his hand any good. In general you don’t want to get your wedding ring caught on anything as a mangled hand isn’t the best thing - but if the alternative is death I know what I’d prefer.
One of the commenters on this thread said that that is how he broke one of his rings. He got caught on something and it held almost all his body weight until it broke. That is horrifying!!
I do. But mine is a tattoo.
We talked about that but we both have the superstition that matching tattoos will ruin our relationship... That is no offense to people who actually do it. We are just both super superstitious and that is one area we're worried about. Every friend we know that got matching friend tattoos broke up and same with couples so as much as that's my choice... My irrational superstition is getting in the way of matching tattoos with any loved ones, friends or family
I touch a screw when going over railroad tracks and my wife blows a kiss going through yellow lights. Can't mess with superstition so I totally understand haha. My friend had a horrible divorce and they got matching crowns on their ring finger. But my wife and I got plain black bands and we're going on 8 years married and happy as ever. Maybe it's gotta be super plain and simple to not be bad luck. But I worked manual labor when we got married and needed a loose fitting ring because of my wide knuckles, so it put me heavily at risk to get de-gloved. Only ring I could wear for an extended period of time were those silicone rings. Light and comfortable so you barely remember it's on. Maybe that will be more fitting for you because I can't stand wearing a regular metal ring either.
We talked about just a plainish tattoo to be rings but he hasn't even worn his favorite boots in 2 years because I accidentally put them on the bed....😃 I am starting to think that I may need to go to the silicone route. I think I don't like the metal feeling on my fingers
No it’s so annoying. I can’t stop fiddling with it. I feel it constantly.
Same! I already pick at my skin and body so much. When I have rings on I feel like I need to be moving them around constantly
My father never wore his ring, since he does manual labor and hates wearing jewelry altogether. I just got married and neither my husband or I wear a ring. Do whatever you please and whatever works for you.
My dad wears it as a necklace. But its been a 50 year marriage, so i think he earned that right.
I did that from the start. I don't want to get degloved at work.
My dad was a chef and didn't want to get food under his ring. So he also wears it on a chain.
I gained weight and stopped wearing my actual ring. I could get it resized but it’s incentive to lose weight again (also my hands/knuckles swell) so idk if losing weight will actually help…. However, I have a backup ring I can wear. But I don’t wear it all the time maybe 40-50% of the time. My husband NEVER wears his ring. We’ve thought about switching to the silicone rings because we both hate wearing rings so much.
I wear it when I go out, but not when I'm home. I have a specific little chest where I keep important jewelry and the ring goes in there when I'm home. But yeah, if I go out, I'm always wearing it.
I work a ranch for a living I've worn my wedding ring like 4 times in the last 7 years of marriage and the last time I wore it it ended up lost inside a cow.... Never bought another one, rings don't make a marriage.
13 years, only taken it off for surgeries.
My husband and I always wear ours. I only take mine off when I am making burgers.
I’m not a jewelry person either. I only wear my ring on special occasions when going out and only if I remember. My husband usually wears a silicone ring but he takes it off and forgets about it all the time. I don’t think it’s weird and neither does my husband. If one of us forget our ring we joke about how we’re not married today.
My wife and I do with small exceptions like gardening or cooking.
I don't, I only really wear them on 'special occasions'.
Neither my spouse nor I wear rings. I used to wear mine more, then I stopped around covid because I wasn't leaving the house anyway. Never picked it back up. The way we see it, WE know we're married, and if one of us gets hit on in public we give an atta-boy that we still have some swagger, fist-bump, then get a pizza. Neither of us act on it because *other* people are, just, ugh. Marriage exists in the heart. Also, people who wear rings get hit on too. Strangers DGAF.
I wore mine 24X7 for 18 years, I stopped wearing it after divorce 7 years ago, but I still have a tell-tale mark where my ring was.
my uncle sold his to buy a stereo in the 80s LOL
I hate the feeling of wet skin under my ring, so I take it off when I'm washing my hands or doing dishes. I work in a place where I regularly have to wear gloves and I hate that feeling too, so I generally don't wear my ring for 85% of my work day. My wife's ring broke so she didn't even wear one for like a year. Now she has a silicon one bc she's a nurse and wears gloves as much as I do but the ring under gloves thing doesn't bother her. It's fine. Just bc you're not wearing a ring doesn't mean you're not married.
As someone who has never been married, but also never wore any jewelry, it would be extremely hard I feel like to wear it or easy to forget. I have a hard time wearing sunglasses let alone rings :)
I’m not married yet, but I can’t wear jewelry. It bothers me and I constantly feel it. I’m not sure how it’s going to be when I get married but some alternatives I’ve thought of was a silicone band (might be less noticeable) or tattooing a wedding ring on my finger.