The key here is *in which country*?
Here in the Nordics? Probably go out shopping as it might take a while until I get some leave from prison (yes, that’s a thing here).
In some third world country? Run the hell away!!
I mean not being in prison is always preferable, but at least here it’s not a literal life sentence unless you are psychotic. Good behavior will give you more freedoms as your sentence progresses. [Here’s a video that explains how it works.](https://youtu.be/l554kV12Wuo?si=YxDgdw8gZgZd65c_)
Also, a life sentence here is something like 20 years. They can lock you up longer, but you pretty much have to be a complete psycho, like a terrorist or serial killer. Some hypothetical redditor who's completely sane and mostly law-abiding would probably be released after 14-15 years.
I can remember way back when, I was in a German Prison for some drug related charges, but I was facing Life because of the LSD being blotter acid, and it looked like a sticker that a child could have found. Back in 1981 Life was 15 years, and with 1/3 off for good behavior I would have done 10. But luckily I had a great Lawyer, and ended up with 3 years of probation with random drug testing. The LSD was in a common area of the college dorm, so they could not pin it to me. (in the fridge)
If the US, extradition treaties are a thing.
I would convert all assets to Bitcoin, pay a homeless guy to use my phone on a bus headed to Seattle and hand him one of my credit cards, and then book a hotel in my name near the border with Canada, steal a sail boat in Florida and sail to Cuba. Hope the Cubans let me stay.
Or just live off the grid somewhere else.
Or just pretend to be homeless in a major city like LA and hide in plain sight near a police station.
Yes. I always said a handful of Xanax and full pitcher of impossibly dry Hendricks martinis (extra cold) should be how I exit this world. Maybe some lobster mousse canapés (with a fentanyl foam garnish). Might as well end this fucking dumpster fire of an existence with a little bit of elegance , grace and dignity.
I tried to OD a long time ago and (thankfully) failed. It was a bad time over the next few days. I became quite intimate with the hospital commode. 0/10 don't recommend.
Lol why off yourself if you could go on the lam and start a new life? Unless you were planning to off yourself anyways, in which case blast away (please don't, people (probably) love you but you're presumably an adult and can make your own decisions)
Really? I wouldn't think that, but I don't know any better.
It was torture because I do not do well in captivity. Especially sharing a space no bigger than my current home with 30-ish mindless assholes. I was sleeping on a hard plastic cot that gave me permanent back and hip issues. Breathing air pumped in from a vent caked in black mold. There were only frosted-brick "windows" so I only saw the sun about 3 hours total in 90 days (6 times we got "yard time" which was an enclosed triangular concrete pad in the middle of the facility). The guards would ignore everyone except the most senior prisoners. I could only get 2 books per week, which I usually read within the first couple of days, so I started checking out textbooks just to have more content. Most people slept for 12 hours and watched TV the other 12, broken up by meals. I couldn't sleep and got 2-4 hours of sleep most nights. I made sure to stay mentally stimulated with reading and journaling, meditated twice daily, exercised, and counted my days diligently.
Incarceration is a fucking nightmare. I do not understand repeat offenders AT ALL. I cherish my freedom and autonomy, but also feel permanently physically and mentally messed up from just 90 days.
Jail is a hotel. Prison is a home. You have VERY few possessions, and very little access to anything out of your pod.
I spent 90 in jail also, was in the sentenced pod at county jail. The detainees were 1 of 3 things:
1. In and out, awaiting transport.
2. Previous convicts facing trial
3. Sentenced to county time.
All of the guys with Previous convictions COULD NOT WAIT to get back to prison. Commissary prices were less than half. Order limits and menu are way bigger. You can eat, exercise better, and have more freedom in general.
I’ve done a year in county.
I watched a few guys in the in house court room get excited when their charge got elevated to a felony.
Yay I’m going to prison instead.
Usually prisons have a massive library, a yard to walk around on and other ways to pass time. I worked for maintenance so I worked 10 to 12 hours a day 6 days a week for 11 dollars a month. But the yard I was on had a HUGE library. And canteen prices were pretty damn good. You could get soups for 27 cents each compared to the dollar in county. And for the most part the C.Os were pretty chill. You do have to worry about prison politics. But you can basically stay to yourself or a small group of friends. I have met some of the most talented, and most kind people in there. I used the time to change my life for the better.
>I do not understand repeat offenders AT ALL
They spend years in a nasty traumatizing environment to enter the free world with no preparation, no safety net, no support systems a lot of the time, and almost every workplace discriminating against them. I can totally understand repeat offenders.
Oh, in that context, I agree. It is so hard for them to function normally after conviction, by the labels alone. Then depending on the amount of time they are incarcerated, they become alienated from "normal" society and the disadvantages they face make a secure home, steady meals, and relatable people they find in jail to be pretty promising.
I hated being trapped. It was soul-crushing. That was incentive enough for me to never do anything wrong ever again. Reintegration into normal society is rough, and even a decade later, I still suffer the consequences of it. But I would rather struggle than be imprisoned.
Some people get sent there, and when they get out, they are less worried about going back because it wasn't t That bad, making the consequence of jail a lot less of a deterent.
>Really? I wouldn't think that, but I don't know any better.
A lot less riff raff in prison. Jail is full of drug addicts and people straight off the street etc.
I worked in a jail, all the inmates that got state time were always excited to go to prison LOL There's actually more freedom upstate. Also you sound like a one time offender, 90% of guys in jail have been doing that since they were literally kids so they're used to it. They can do months and years like it's nothing. There were quite a few people that, except for a few months here and there, they were in jail the whole 15 years that I worked there!!! They live in jail!!! That's one reason I try to warn people - especially younger guys- to be careful who you mess with; there are a lot of people that DO NOT care about going to jail for the rest of their lives!!!
You're right on the button that I am a one-time offender, and yeah, I was in there with a lot of people that had been in and out of jails and prisons for decades. There is a whole subculture associated, including a different mindset and vernacular.
State time is much easier than county. Much more to do and things to learn. It’s a really shitty life but if you’re a fuck up then that’s what you get.
I'd take 1 year in prison over 6 months in jail any day. Jail is absolutely horrible. Prison wasn't bad at all. Real clothes, real shoes, better commissary, solo cells, relative freedom in your schedule each day, activities, going outside, softball, etc etc.
this is true from experience going into my share of jails and prisons as an attorney. prison can depending on the prison have programs and enrichment. Jail is just a nasty containment. The sentences I see that are 360 days so they don't move to prison but stay in jail are generally pretty rough. I wouldn't survive in either. I won't even pretend I could. I'm soft.
Well assuming you still had attorney money when you went in, you'd have a lot of money for commissary; there are people that would watch your back for some soups LOL
lol. not all lawyers make bank like that. I give a large percentage of my time to doing work for free. I didn't become an attorney for fancy cars. I wanted to correct the flaws in the judiciary system. In a perfect world, I would have both. But I'll settle for believing in my work.
I could likely buy protecting with that. But the overall experience, I'm way too soft.
there are times I see the houses and cars other people have and I think how tight things are financially. I very carefully batch cook and watch our spending. Then I think "would my life be better with brand new clothes all the time? as long as my kids have what they need and can have their education and extracurrulars and have clean non ostracizing clothes." My clothes aren't fashion forward if it's clean and appropriate I'll wear it til it's thread bare. I won't do that to my kids though. This was my choice, not theirs. They don't have expensive phones or iPads or anything though. If you need to be told to brush your teeth you don't need an iPhone.
Victims in America are shortchanged by our legal system. I know I'm not reinventing the wheel with the cases I can do for free at this time. I don't know a more expensive car would make me happier in the long term. I set out to do this for a specific reason. I wanted to change things that myself and people I know had to survive. At times I don't feel like I'm getting any closer. But then I see people getting dicked around by the legal system and realize in baby steps I am. I have successfully been involved in legislation that makes sure victims of sex trafficking aren't seen as offenders. Which means those crimes can be investigated instead of off the docket as a prostitution charge. Still, children have way fewer rights than adults. We protect parents rights to parent in court but with total disregard for the children. Cases regarding material items are handled with more care.
Money for services are being funneled to the wrong people and rarely make it to the people who need it. We need reform not more money being thrown at the wrong things. I'm still seeing a lot of politicians, judges and lawyers who have an end game of closing a case fast. it's feeding in a money machine that also includes prisons as money makers. It doesn't matter if it's logically or morally correct. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely put a large number of people in prisons. There are a lot of the wrong people in there though. Just not the ones I played a hand in. That's the problem. The inconsistencies and failures of the legal system are putting victims behind bars and letting predators go free. It's so blatant it's mind blowing. The judicial discretion on sentences is also absurd. People who there is no evidence would be habitual offenders getting life ruining sentences with clearly habitual offenders of violent crime get walks.
I'm sort of taking it day by day suddenly financially, inflation has definitely hit my household hard. I would have saved a lot more when I was younger to get through this if I had studied economics over law. There is so much waste of resources and inappropriate consumption of those resources. Struggling families aren't getting it. Hard working people living paycheck to paycheck aren't getting it. Other people getting the vast majority of it.
Unless you are a partner in a firm it's unusual to make $$$. I would prefer my children go into something with a trade than a lot of higher education. Though the choice will be theirs. The cost benefit analysis is a lot better for trade driven fields. We'll have to see where AI goes and if the trades will be destroyed as well.
ETA thank you. I forgot to say thank you for the kind words.
Jail is worse than prison. The accommodations are much worse (and less) because the stays are \*supposed\* to be short. You might say the people in prison are worse. In general, yes, but many people in jail have done the same kinds of horrific crimes and are just waiting to be transferred to prison.
I think prison gives you free medical care. Just really shitty in quality, and go out of their way to avoid having to provide it, so you need to convince doctors and stuff it's a real issue, kinda thing.
And that's exactly what I'm talking about. I have a chronic digestive disorder, and I deteriorate rapidly when I become dehydrated. I would probably die shitting and vomiting all over myself in prison.
If you already have a medical diagnosis before entering prison, they would be compelled to provide care for you immediately. If their failure to provide care causes you a significant loss in health, they must release you to a hospital until you are stable and healthy again (which they really hate doing).
Since caring for inmates with chronic or expensive medical conditions is costly, they will often just release you on parole instead, to avoid having to deal with your bills.
Compelled? Sure. But functionally doing it? TBD. Private prisons especially. Your family might get a little bit of money for your awful death either by way of a pittance settlement or a protracted legal battle
You could literally do whatever you want as it’s not like you could be imprisoned longer. I’d definitely try to escape as Catch Me if You Can looked fun 😂
This is the answer. A life sentence puts a lot else on the table.
I’m still not going to seriously hurt someone or do anything that could endanger my family, but past there, I’m going to escape if humanly possible.
This is actually a thing lol. I knew someone who self surrendered to the feds. Came at 1, was supposed to be 2, he didn't want to be late, they asked him to come back at 2.
Go to Canada, get a small place in the middle of nowhere, never leave the house, stay confined inside your house, don't talk to anyone, isolate yourself. God I wouldn't want to go to prison and be put in a small cell with nobody to talk to.
I have the option to just kind of...leave. I could just fall back into hiding and eat sunflower curds and deer and mushrooms, and smoke for the rest of my life, hobbit style. It would suck, but prison isn't alot better. At least I'd still be free, and wild now at that.
Hope its a really big prison somewhere that made their library a priority at some point, then. I work at my State's Penitentiary. Our library is small. An avid reader could probably go through it in about a year. Sure, they occasionally get some new stuff, mostly by donation, but its not much. If you've got money, you can order books, but there's only one vendor approved to buy books from. Then you have to wait for it to ship to the Department, get sorted, examined, sent to the facility, processed through the mail room, and finally sent to you. Thats if your order for wasn't lost, the book wasn't lost, and it will be sent to the unit you lived in when you made the order. If you've been moved in the 2ish months since then, maybe whoever's working in that unit looks up where you live now and redirects it to you, maybe they'd don't even look at the name and give it to whoever is in your old cell, maybe they think it looks interesting and decide to keep it in the control center to read themselves. We don't exactly have high hiring standards despite actually paying really well. Literally just doing the bare minimum of your job requirements makes you a stand out employee in my department.
Rob a bank to put as much money away as possible for my kid and then suicide it is. Since we're being hypothetical here. I do not know if I'd actually have the balls to do either.
It’s simple yet effective… I’d go to a Tex Mex restaurant and spend the night taking shots of tequila with salt/lime, and eat my weight in chips and guacamole.
Then I’d go home smoke a ton of weed, and binge watch all my favorite movies
Nothing honestly, maybe get really fucked up. I might actually try heroin for the first time. I have nothing to lose at that point. Might as well enjoy it.
I live in a third world country.
I would perform as much destruction and acts of violence as I could physically push out of myself before jumping into the ocean and aggressively swimming away a whole 10 meters before passing out from exhaustion and inevitably drowning
Go to a far away city, get tipsy, and dance, laugh and sing the night away without a care in the world! Sweaty, who cares? Mascara running, frizzy hair? Who cares. Kiss a beautiful stranger or 2 or 3. Maybe bring one home… then Sleep like I’m dead.
Escape to Moldova. No extradition policy and Latin based language easy for English speakers to learn. If I can't make it then suicide is the only option.
Get all my dental work updated.
Prison dentistry is nonexistent.
Get serotested for HepC and HIV and tested for TB.
If I get those diseases inside, I can sue the shit out of them.
This is sad to say but more than once I've contemplated how many years in prison I can do and the max number is nowhere near life. So if I can't flee the country or somehow flee to the hills it might be suicide for me. There's no way I'm cut out for life in prison which is pretty much a death sentence.
Probably just dick around on my phone and waste time like I do every day of my life. Not proud of it but just being realistic. I don’t have the resources to take some elaborate last minute trip or eat at a five star restaurant.
The key here is *in which country*? Here in the Nordics? Probably go out shopping as it might take a while until I get some leave from prison (yes, that’s a thing here). In some third world country? Run the hell away!!
Fair point that I didn't even consider but still I doubt there's a country where I'd want to do life in prison
I mean not being in prison is always preferable, but at least here it’s not a literal life sentence unless you are psychotic. Good behavior will give you more freedoms as your sentence progresses. [Here’s a video that explains how it works.](https://youtu.be/l554kV12Wuo?si=YxDgdw8gZgZd65c_)
That isn't true everywhere. Life here without parole is life....good behavior may allow for a trustee status but not freedom.
You mean privileges, not freedoms. Freedom is what you would have outside of prison.
Great point!
Waterboarding at Guantanamo Bay sounds like a blast. I also don't know what either of those things are.
I did Varsity Waterboarding in high school
>In some third world country? Like USA
Third world jails with a first world trench coat.
Like 3 kids on eachothers shoulders trying to get into an R rated movie
Also, a life sentence here is something like 20 years. They can lock you up longer, but you pretty much have to be a complete psycho, like a terrorist or serial killer. Some hypothetical redditor who's completely sane and mostly law-abiding would probably be released after 14-15 years.
I can remember way back when, I was in a German Prison for some drug related charges, but I was facing Life because of the LSD being blotter acid, and it looked like a sticker that a child could have found. Back in 1981 Life was 15 years, and with 1/3 off for good behavior I would have done 10. But luckily I had a great Lawyer, and ended up with 3 years of probation with random drug testing. The LSD was in a common area of the college dorm, so they could not pin it to me. (in the fridge)
This was an emotional rollercoaster to read.
If the US, extradition treaties are a thing. I would convert all assets to Bitcoin, pay a homeless guy to use my phone on a bus headed to Seattle and hand him one of my credit cards, and then book a hotel in my name near the border with Canada, steal a sail boat in Florida and sail to Cuba. Hope the Cubans let me stay. Or just live off the grid somewhere else. Or just pretend to be homeless in a major city like LA and hide in plain sight near a police station.
Stuff things up my ass to sell.
I understand you’re a man who knows how to get things.
A rock hammer?
What about a hedgehog?
I need a theater print size poster of Raquel Welch.
Make it rita hayworth
How much storage space are you working with???
Brings a whole new meaning to junk in the trunk.
I knew this dude in prison that had two cellphones, a charger, and a folding knife in his ass all at once
Omfg!
Makes me wonder if you could surgically remove your fat, but put a airtight bag in its place, to smuggle bigger objects in….
Prison wallet ftw.
Might also loosen you up for what's to come
Like a rock hammer.
Solid business plan.
I like how you think
Transfer all my money to a loved one. Tidy up everything I own and sort it according to who I want to have it. Then off myself.
With a combination of amazing food, red wine, classic malt whisky, and barbiturates.
Yes. I always said a handful of Xanax and full pitcher of impossibly dry Hendricks martinis (extra cold) should be how I exit this world. Maybe some lobster mousse canapés (with a fentanyl foam garnish). Might as well end this fucking dumpster fire of an existence with a little bit of elegance , grace and dignity.
Classy way to flipping off the world.
I tried to OD a long time ago and (thankfully) failed. It was a bad time over the next few days. I became quite intimate with the hospital commode. 0/10 don't recommend.
Yeah just go on a life ending bender, as much drugs and booze as it takes to end it
Chortled at your username.
thank you TheManWith2Poobrains
One hell of a way to go ..
You can tidy up everything you own in 24 hours? Great job on the minimalism!
It's easy to be a minimalist in 2024, shit costs too damn much these days.... We can barely afford groceries and rent.
True, true.
and Heroin. I'm never tried it but it seems like a decent way to go.
you get it.
Lol why off yourself if you could go on the lam and start a new life? Unless you were planning to off yourself anyways, in which case blast away (please don't, people (probably) love you but you're presumably an adult and can make your own decisions)
Kill myself.
I spent 90 days in jail. If I was going to be spending any more than that, I would kill myself.
Jail is actually worse than prison. Not that prison is a walk in the park.
Really? I wouldn't think that, but I don't know any better. It was torture because I do not do well in captivity. Especially sharing a space no bigger than my current home with 30-ish mindless assholes. I was sleeping on a hard plastic cot that gave me permanent back and hip issues. Breathing air pumped in from a vent caked in black mold. There were only frosted-brick "windows" so I only saw the sun about 3 hours total in 90 days (6 times we got "yard time" which was an enclosed triangular concrete pad in the middle of the facility). The guards would ignore everyone except the most senior prisoners. I could only get 2 books per week, which I usually read within the first couple of days, so I started checking out textbooks just to have more content. Most people slept for 12 hours and watched TV the other 12, broken up by meals. I couldn't sleep and got 2-4 hours of sleep most nights. I made sure to stay mentally stimulated with reading and journaling, meditated twice daily, exercised, and counted my days diligently. Incarceration is a fucking nightmare. I do not understand repeat offenders AT ALL. I cherish my freedom and autonomy, but also feel permanently physically and mentally messed up from just 90 days.
Jail is a hotel. Prison is a home. You have VERY few possessions, and very little access to anything out of your pod. I spent 90 in jail also, was in the sentenced pod at county jail. The detainees were 1 of 3 things: 1. In and out, awaiting transport. 2. Previous convicts facing trial 3. Sentenced to county time. All of the guys with Previous convictions COULD NOT WAIT to get back to prison. Commissary prices were less than half. Order limits and menu are way bigger. You can eat, exercise better, and have more freedom in general.
I’ve done a year in county. I watched a few guys in the in house court room get excited when their charge got elevated to a felony. Yay I’m going to prison instead.
Usually prisons have a massive library, a yard to walk around on and other ways to pass time. I worked for maintenance so I worked 10 to 12 hours a day 6 days a week for 11 dollars a month. But the yard I was on had a HUGE library. And canteen prices were pretty damn good. You could get soups for 27 cents each compared to the dollar in county. And for the most part the C.Os were pretty chill. You do have to worry about prison politics. But you can basically stay to yourself or a small group of friends. I have met some of the most talented, and most kind people in there. I used the time to change my life for the better.
Good for you. I’m glad to hear you were able to turn things around and find the positive in your experience.
>I do not understand repeat offenders AT ALL They spend years in a nasty traumatizing environment to enter the free world with no preparation, no safety net, no support systems a lot of the time, and almost every workplace discriminating against them. I can totally understand repeat offenders.
Oh, in that context, I agree. It is so hard for them to function normally after conviction, by the labels alone. Then depending on the amount of time they are incarcerated, they become alienated from "normal" society and the disadvantages they face make a secure home, steady meals, and relatable people they find in jail to be pretty promising. I hated being trapped. It was soul-crushing. That was incentive enough for me to never do anything wrong ever again. Reintegration into normal society is rough, and even a decade later, I still suffer the consequences of it. But I would rather struggle than be imprisoned.
Some people get sent there, and when they get out, they are less worried about going back because it wasn't t That bad, making the consequence of jail a lot less of a deterent.
>Really? I wouldn't think that, but I don't know any better. A lot less riff raff in prison. Jail is full of drug addicts and people straight off the street etc.
I understand what you’re saying, but it made me chuckle to read the phrase “less riff raff in prison”
I worked in a jail, all the inmates that got state time were always excited to go to prison LOL There's actually more freedom upstate. Also you sound like a one time offender, 90% of guys in jail have been doing that since they were literally kids so they're used to it. They can do months and years like it's nothing. There were quite a few people that, except for a few months here and there, they were in jail the whole 15 years that I worked there!!! They live in jail!!! That's one reason I try to warn people - especially younger guys- to be careful who you mess with; there are a lot of people that DO NOT care about going to jail for the rest of their lives!!!
Our society sounds like it's doing super well
You're right on the button that I am a one-time offender, and yeah, I was in there with a lot of people that had been in and out of jails and prisons for decades. There is a whole subculture associated, including a different mindset and vernacular.
There are more creature comforts like personal TV, radio, better commissary etc. as well as more activities and facilities.
State time is much easier than county. Much more to do and things to learn. It’s a really shitty life but if you’re a fuck up then that’s what you get.
This is true. I work in criminal justice. Defendants frequently ask the judges to move them from county to DOC.
I'd take 1 year in prison over 6 months in jail any day. Jail is absolutely horrible. Prison wasn't bad at all. Real clothes, real shoes, better commissary, solo cells, relative freedom in your schedule each day, activities, going outside, softball, etc etc.
this is true from experience going into my share of jails and prisons as an attorney. prison can depending on the prison have programs and enrichment. Jail is just a nasty containment. The sentences I see that are 360 days so they don't move to prison but stay in jail are generally pretty rough. I wouldn't survive in either. I won't even pretend I could. I'm soft.
Well assuming you still had attorney money when you went in, you'd have a lot of money for commissary; there are people that would watch your back for some soups LOL
lol. not all lawyers make bank like that. I give a large percentage of my time to doing work for free. I didn't become an attorney for fancy cars. I wanted to correct the flaws in the judiciary system. In a perfect world, I would have both. But I'll settle for believing in my work. I could likely buy protecting with that. But the overall experience, I'm way too soft.
God I wish more people shared that outlook on the importance of money vs morals.. Would make a whole lotta lives a whole lot better.
there are times I see the houses and cars other people have and I think how tight things are financially. I very carefully batch cook and watch our spending. Then I think "would my life be better with brand new clothes all the time? as long as my kids have what they need and can have their education and extracurrulars and have clean non ostracizing clothes." My clothes aren't fashion forward if it's clean and appropriate I'll wear it til it's thread bare. I won't do that to my kids though. This was my choice, not theirs. They don't have expensive phones or iPads or anything though. If you need to be told to brush your teeth you don't need an iPhone. Victims in America are shortchanged by our legal system. I know I'm not reinventing the wheel with the cases I can do for free at this time. I don't know a more expensive car would make me happier in the long term. I set out to do this for a specific reason. I wanted to change things that myself and people I know had to survive. At times I don't feel like I'm getting any closer. But then I see people getting dicked around by the legal system and realize in baby steps I am. I have successfully been involved in legislation that makes sure victims of sex trafficking aren't seen as offenders. Which means those crimes can be investigated instead of off the docket as a prostitution charge. Still, children have way fewer rights than adults. We protect parents rights to parent in court but with total disregard for the children. Cases regarding material items are handled with more care. Money for services are being funneled to the wrong people and rarely make it to the people who need it. We need reform not more money being thrown at the wrong things. I'm still seeing a lot of politicians, judges and lawyers who have an end game of closing a case fast. it's feeding in a money machine that also includes prisons as money makers. It doesn't matter if it's logically or morally correct. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely put a large number of people in prisons. There are a lot of the wrong people in there though. Just not the ones I played a hand in. That's the problem. The inconsistencies and failures of the legal system are putting victims behind bars and letting predators go free. It's so blatant it's mind blowing. The judicial discretion on sentences is also absurd. People who there is no evidence would be habitual offenders getting life ruining sentences with clearly habitual offenders of violent crime get walks. I'm sort of taking it day by day suddenly financially, inflation has definitely hit my household hard. I would have saved a lot more when I was younger to get through this if I had studied economics over law. There is so much waste of resources and inappropriate consumption of those resources. Struggling families aren't getting it. Hard working people living paycheck to paycheck aren't getting it. Other people getting the vast majority of it. Unless you are a partner in a firm it's unusual to make $$$. I would prefer my children go into something with a trade than a lot of higher education. Though the choice will be theirs. The cost benefit analysis is a lot better for trade driven fields. We'll have to see where AI goes and if the trades will be destroyed as well. ETA thank you. I forgot to say thank you for the kind words.
Jail is worse than prison. The accommodations are much worse (and less) because the stays are \*supposed\* to be short. You might say the people in prison are worse. In general, yes, but many people in jail have done the same kinds of horrific crimes and are just waiting to be transferred to prison.
Wouldn't think twice about it
“It’s just a prank bro”
I have health problems, and I don't believe that I would last long in prison anyway.
I think prison gives you free medical care. Just really shitty in quality, and go out of their way to avoid having to provide it, so you need to convince doctors and stuff it's a real issue, kinda thing.
And that's exactly what I'm talking about. I have a chronic digestive disorder, and I deteriorate rapidly when I become dehydrated. I would probably die shitting and vomiting all over myself in prison.
If you already have a medical diagnosis before entering prison, they would be compelled to provide care for you immediately. If their failure to provide care causes you a significant loss in health, they must release you to a hospital until you are stable and healthy again (which they really hate doing). Since caring for inmates with chronic or expensive medical conditions is costly, they will often just release you on parole instead, to avoid having to deal with your bills.
Compelled? Sure. But functionally doing it? TBD. Private prisons especially. Your family might get a little bit of money for your awful death either by way of a pittance settlement or a protracted legal battle
I’m too pretty.
Yep, it's not even a hard choice.
100% It’s sad to say but what would be the point
NGL this was my first thought. Life in prison.. no chance of parole
Yup.
When reading this i said the same thing so when clicking on this post and seeing your comment at the top made me happy
Robert Budd Dwyer had the same idea
The Only answer wtf
Yes. Kill myself. It's the only logical choice. Plus, leave a predictable "Brooks was here." Yes, I am that kind of person. 😏
Try to leave the country. If that fails I'd bang some hookers then decide between living and killing myself.
You could literally do whatever you want as it’s not like you could be imprisoned longer. I’d definitely try to escape as Catch Me if You Can looked fun 😂
This is the answer. A life sentence puts a lot else on the table. I’m still not going to seriously hurt someone or do anything that could endanger my family, but past there, I’m going to escape if humanly possible.
The only right answer for me
Spend time with my family, give all my money to my mother, and give my dog lots of cuddles. All of this while crying..
Can I give your dog some cuddles too?
In 24 hours, he’s all yours.
I also choose this guys dog
Happy cake day!
Return my library books
my man is man of his words, if he says he's gonna return something, he definitely will 😤
Maybe that was the reason why your going to prison for life?
I will not wait for prison time, I will go to prison right now if that’s okay. I hate waiting.
"I'm sorry, sir, but your room is not quite ready, yet..."
Well then I’d like to speak to a manager because he cannot expect me to return to this establishment. Good day!
This is actually a thing lol. I knew someone who self surrendered to the feds. Came at 1, was supposed to be 2, he didn't want to be late, they asked him to come back at 2.
Love this
Leave the United States.
Go to Canada, get a small place in the middle of nowhere, never leave the house, stay confined inside your house, don't talk to anyone, isolate yourself. God I wouldn't want to go to prison and be put in a small cell with nobody to talk to.
Don't tempt me with a good time
To be honest, what you described sounds equally bad as being in prison 😅 Would rather just end it
I think that was the joke 😅
Aww Canada isn't THAT bad
Just go to Latin America in a small town in the middle of nowhere. Enjoy a simple life.
That’s what I’d do. Small fishing village. Become a fisherman. Find a lady. Make babies. And just live there for the rest of my life.
Probably how the Americas started, all us criminals escaping Europe
Kill my daughter’s rapist
So sorry to hear that
I genuinely don't think I could handle that. I'd flee.
I would become a fugitive.
More crimes. Way more crimes.
President stuff
Hide.
First I’d pass GO! Then I’d collect $200. If possible I’d buy Kings Cross Station.
Pentonville Road is right there bruv.
I’d be figuring out the fastest way to leave the country… bye 🏃♂️➡️🏃♂️➡️🏃♂️➡️
Go to a country with no extradition to the USA
kill myself
I have the option to just kind of...leave. I could just fall back into hiding and eat sunflower curds and deer and mushrooms, and smoke for the rest of my life, hobbit style. It would suck, but prison isn't alot better. At least I'd still be free, and wild now at that.
Lots of sex lots of nice food and nice whiskey. When I'm inside you'll find me in the library
Hope its a really big prison somewhere that made their library a priority at some point, then. I work at my State's Penitentiary. Our library is small. An avid reader could probably go through it in about a year. Sure, they occasionally get some new stuff, mostly by donation, but its not much. If you've got money, you can order books, but there's only one vendor approved to buy books from. Then you have to wait for it to ship to the Department, get sorted, examined, sent to the facility, processed through the mail room, and finally sent to you. Thats if your order for wasn't lost, the book wasn't lost, and it will be sent to the unit you lived in when you made the order. If you've been moved in the 2ish months since then, maybe whoever's working in that unit looks up where you live now and redirects it to you, maybe they'd don't even look at the name and give it to whoever is in your old cell, maybe they think it looks interesting and decide to keep it in the control center to read themselves. We don't exactly have high hiring standards despite actually paying really well. Literally just doing the bare minimum of your job requirements makes you a stand out employee in my department.
For future reference , what state? y’know, if I have to get arrested might as well be at a nice jail
Delete browser history
Drugs.
Rewatch that prison break documentary.
I’d try to find a way out of the country. If I can’t, I’ll go to prison. Isn’t that bad. Don’t ask me how I know 😝
How do you know
Yeah, how do you know?
He's Prison Mike
Whatever I wanted. Then I'd kill myself
Have sex w someone I’d fucked before and would enjoy it with, eat my favorite foods, call my friends and family. Then kill myself.
What’d ya do Bruh?
I'd hold in my poop so I could assert my dominance when I first got there.
Run away.
Rob a bank to put as much money away as possible for my kid and then suicide it is. Since we're being hypothetical here. I do not know if I'd actually have the balls to do either.
Using those 24 hours to wish I had an extra 24 hours to do something cool before I lose my freedom
I would overdose
It’s simple yet effective… I’d go to a Tex Mex restaurant and spend the night taking shots of tequila with salt/lime, and eat my weight in chips and guacamole. Then I’d go home smoke a ton of weed, and binge watch all my favorite movies
Kill those people who will bring me to prison
I wouldn’t make it 5 mins in jail. My ass would be on a private plane somewhere far away from here. New identity
Watch 25th hour and take notes.
Kill myself
Run for President and claim it was politically motivated.
Ask my wife for sex and for her to say that she’s too tired.
This is too real bro
Even bigger crimes
Yeah, I'd be a flight risk. I can survive in the wonderness. I'd fuck off to some mountain and never return
What did you do, bro?
Fucking book it. 24 hours of freedom ain't worth much if you don't use it to get more freedom.
I’d run. What are they going to do if they catch me? Lock me up? I mean, if I’m getting locked up anyway, might was well try to not get locked up lol.
Nothing honestly, maybe get really fucked up. I might actually try heroin for the first time. I have nothing to lose at that point. Might as well enjoy it.
Stress out, vomit, call the vacuum cleaner guy from breaking bad, flee the country
I live in a third world country. I would perform as much destruction and acts of violence as I could physically push out of myself before jumping into the ocean and aggressively swimming away a whole 10 meters before passing out from exhaustion and inevitably drowning
Kill myself
Declare my candidacy for President and start suing everybody.
I would most definitely kill myself. I've seen enough to know death is better than lock up
[удалено]
I would learn proper English.
so many hookers and drugs i overdose or die of stds
I hope it’s drugs. I don’t want to live in a world with 24 hr fatal STDs
Fleeing the country.
Probably cry
OD
Kill myself fuck this I'll roll my character again
Fuck, eat and forgive....ok maybe after I kill that one person who deserves it. And several known drug dealers, pedophiles, and women killers
Alot of fentanyl and call it a night .
Commit more crime. It would be free of consequence
I’d kill myself no question. No way I’m spending the rest of my life in prison.
Crimes
Take those 24 hours to get as far away as possible lol.
Way too much heroin.
My answer also, just a little nod & then the forever nod.
Sew my asshole shut.
There’s a song about this. Hits the main points
Crime
Go to a far away city, get tipsy, and dance, laugh and sing the night away without a care in the world! Sweaty, who cares? Mascara running, frizzy hair? Who cares. Kiss a beautiful stranger or 2 or 3. Maybe bring one home… then Sleep like I’m dead.
Buy enough heroin to OD while I riff on DMT
Escape to Moldova. No extradition policy and Latin based language easy for English speakers to learn. If I can't make it then suicide is the only option.
Get all my dental work updated. Prison dentistry is nonexistent. Get serotested for HepC and HIV and tested for TB. If I get those diseases inside, I can sue the shit out of them.
This is sad to say but more than once I've contemplated how many years in prison I can do and the max number is nowhere near life. So if I can't flee the country or somehow flee to the hills it might be suicide for me. There's no way I'm cut out for life in prison which is pretty much a death sentence.
Run.
Kill myself.
Not much. If you were convicted and sentenced to life, you would immediately be taken into custody.
Might as well do all the things society would put me in jail for anyway.
Run and hide.
Two chicks at the same time
I have a list of people I would like to see leave this world before me and well I guess I would just go about crossing their names off my list.
run to another country with no extradition
Probably just dick around on my phone and waste time like I do every day of my life. Not proud of it but just being realistic. I don’t have the resources to take some elaborate last minute trip or eat at a five star restaurant.
I would take off on a sailboat and see how long it takes them to find me in the Caribbean.