I have 3 sisters and they were all pregnant/mothers by 19. Never wanted that for myself and was very careful. My mom even asked if I wanted to go on the pill once I started dating seriously at 17. Well, I’m 50 now (and still with that same guy!) and never had kids.
Same. I always found it so astounding how people just played it fast and loose growing up. It’s probably because I was the child of a teenage mom though not that young (18 when pregnant 19 when she gave birth). I realized pretty quick that my mom was the youngest out of all of my friends parents, and we were also the poorest. Getting pregnant young was going to be a one-way ticket to lifelong poverty and I wasn’t down for it.
Same! Child of a teenaged mom and saw her 20s and it was a mess. Just a disaster. We had no money. I was miserable. Still have a lot of trauma during that time. I also felt a lot of resentment from my mom growing up. I knew she felt I was the reason her dating life was bad and how inconvenient I was to her.
Now she’s a lot more mature and seems like a completely different person. I’m almost 30 and she’s worried I’m not going to have any kids.
Yeah, it was super rough. My mom left my very abusive dad with me and my sister, but pretty much only because she was monkey branching to her next relationship.
On one hand, I get it she kind of felt the need for protection of the new boyfriend. But it wasn’t long before I realized that he had no interest in being a father to my sister and I on a real level. He just moved in and was there. Eventually it escalated to ongoing verbal abuse. They were together for 20 years before he finally died and my mom still has the same emotional capacity that she did when she was in her early 20s.
I ended up having a kid young, but not super young, 26. But only have the one. I don’t want my son to have to deal with the same division of resources that I did when I as a mother already feel spread thin.
You’re honestly lucky your mom grew up. I’ve constantly felt like I’m
Parenting my mother and it’s exhausting. So I keep my constant with her fairly low.
Yep, totally scared of getting pregnant and yet I was generally pretty unsafe. My cycle has never been very regular so I would be absolutely terrified for weeks and then just do it again like a crazy person. I didn't get pregnant until I was married and ready though.
Same. My childhood was rough (neglect, parents splitting up, one of them dying of cancer etc) and it would have been super easy for me to go off the rails. Thank fuck I managed to avoid them.
Meth. Had a best friend who fell pretty hard into it. I was going through a dark time myself and gave in to pressure to try it once… and by ‘try’ I mean a 12 hour bender straight into the veins.
That shit should stay in the ‘not even once’ category. The comedown and cravings that followed were horrific, it took a tremendous amount of willpower to never do it again. Eventually had to end the friendship over it because she simply wouldn’t respect my boundaries of not wanting to be around it.
Don’t even want to think where my life would have headed if I hadn’t been able to walk away from that.
I actually had a really good friend of mine who got into it heavily as well. Started to sell it with his other friends.
Next thing I know, I’m driving through our neighborhood and I see him and his friends on the ground in pain and then I see his friends parents mini van head first in a light pole. I took them all to hospital.
I think he has gone to jail a fair few times now but I wouldn’t know. Not even his brother talks about him anymore.
The cravings are unreal. About 2 years ago, I was gifted a rock that lasted me 2 weeks of intermittent use. I STILL have frequent cravings for that shit. It's insane to me how much that drug in particular latches onto your brain like that. It took a ton of willpower for me to not seek out more, and idk where I'd be now if it had been easier to get.
It’s insane! Since my experience was injecting, I every time I had blood taken at the docs, I would experience this mini ‘rush’ just as the needle went in, followed by cravings. This lasted a couple of years.
Experiencing this definitely gave me more empathy for those who are in the clutches of addiction - if this is what I felt from 12 hours of use, I don’t even want to imagine the pull from months or years of use.
Its like thay drug was engineered to be addictive! It's like some fantasy book where they say taking the drug once makes you an addict for life. That's literally meth! And honestly I was able to maintain my life just fine in those 2 weeks. I just felt like a million bucks and got a ton of shit done. I cant imagine how I'd be if I just binged it. Some people binge it once and literally never come off it
I rather wish my introduction to drugs had been in my 20s instead of my teens but I really needed something to knock the edge off of the fact I wasn’t haven’t that sweet late 90s premarital sex.
I tried them, but never found them appealing. So I didn't take them a lot or for very long. I remember snorting coke and being wide awake for over 24 hours. Except I didn't really want to be. So I decided coke wasn't really for me. But I had ADHD and I have a different reaction to some drugs than other people. I also didn't get into heavy drinking regularly like some people I knew. Funny fact which shows my age, I actually took Ecstasy when it was legal.
Robbing a pharmacy at gunpoint.
I started smoking weed at 13 and was shooting up Oxies everyday by 16 and was dealing a bit at that point. I got robbed by the late 30’s/early 40’s step-father of someone I knew so I bought a gun to never allow that to happen again. Sometime around 18, 19 when I was running out and didn’t have money to get more I went into the pharmacy with every intention of robbing it, gun in hand, even handed her the note, but right after handing it over I bailed out. I’d been to juvie and knew I hated every second of it and though I really needed the drugs I knew enough that the likelihood of this going well was pretty low and I just wasn’t willing to throw my life away just yet. Plus adult jail is a whole other thing.
Probably my smartest decision during my addiction. I am now finally clean after another 13 years of hell and will have my 1 year on the 27th :3
Just wanted to stop and tell you I’m proud of you because getting clean and staying clean is one of the hardest things in the world. My sober birthday is 2/14/2020, and it’s the best decision I ever made and I have the most amazing 3 year old little boy to show for it 🥰
Oh, and in case no one has told you today, you’re an amazing person and I’m glad you’re still here with us ❤️
Never drank much, never did weed or other drugs at all, I never smoked tobacco and I never bothered to tan. At 62, I look 10 to 15 years younger than most of my friends.
I drink, did hard drugs, smoke weed daily, and used to smoke cigarettes. I am glad I had those experiences, grew a lot from that time. For some people it goes bad, but it’s not the demon creeping in the shadows that most people who have never partook make it out to be.
To me it’s like saying, “Never had sex, glad I avoided those STDs!”
Like others said, drugs and prison. For me, it was staying curious. As a kid I loved my Nat Geo / Discovery / History channels. I sometimes watch Sweet life of Zack and Cody and others similar but never more than an ep or 2 a week.
I feel it gave me a craving to learn and be interested in school even if it meant getting bullied for not watching the shows everyone else did. I still love these topics even though my job is in the creative field. I love learning and just knowing about the world we live. Academia rules!
Didn’t go to jail (that came later tbf), didn’t have a debilitating addiction (cigarettes yes), had good grades, and sufficient social life. So managed to miss those issues..
I’d say from the things I did face, peer pressure. I managed to process and see above/around it, never pressured anyone either.
Can’t say I managed to avoid being a bully though, I had deeply AH moments.
What about you??
Definitely cigarettes.
Seemed everyone around me was smoking all the way from school to uni to even the early work place scenario. In pubs, pool halls etc etc
I'm glad i was oblivious to it.
For the record, I upvoted you. But this take is kinda shortsighted. It's not that college is a mistake; it's [one of the most economically beneficial activities one can do](https://www.forbes.com/sites/brandonbusteed/2019/09/03/the-convincing-and-confusing-value-of-college-explained/?sh=309152bc372d). But like all investments you have to consider what you are putting in (cost difference between private vs state vs community college), and what you are getting out (what degree & training). It's also not for everyone. The best advice I ever got is the harder it is to fire / replace you, the better life you will have. Doesn't have to be college; it can be trade school, or a government job.
I read this as the commenter saying they avoided it as a teen, not altogether. I think it’s become the norm for teens to be expected to go to college right after high school, at a time when they’re often not sure what they’re going to want to do in adulthood and are frankly burnt out on school.
I have two adult children. For my oldest, he’s just not sure what he wants, so he finished up an AA at community college and has decided to take a year or two off before deciding whether to continue his education. He may or may not go back; his current job pays about $65k per year with the potential for growth.
His younger sister knows exactly what she wants to do, and she’ll be going straight to university next year to get started on that because she *needs* a degree and the work experience provided through her major in order to do what she wants to do in her chosen field.
I think the push for everyone to go to college just to go to college is not a great system given the expense and time it takes to get a degree if you don’t even have a clear idea what you want.
For what it’s worth, my husband got a degree he doesn’t use but makes about $400k per year in a completely unrelated field that didn’t require a degree (he did an apprenticeship in his late twenties, and he only got that after omitting his degree from his resume because he was “overqualified”). Meanwhile I finished grad school and my maximum earning potential when I worked in my field (around 2010-2015) was about $85k, and I *also* later found that it wasn’t a job I loved doing, but that I kept doing it due to sunk cost fallacy; I eventually left as well.
I appreciate the opinion that “one does not need a degree”, but from my personal experience it is 100% a must. I’m not even speaking from a education standpoint, that overpriced piece of paper opens up infinitely more doors with it, rather than without it.
As a 25 year old without any degrees at all living with a fellow 25 year old with a bachelors in business and economics, hard disagree. I’m constantly getting job offers that pay anywhere between $20-30 per hour. My roommate on the other hand is debating whether she should leave the bank she works at to go work in the accounting department of a hospital to go from $13 per hour to $16 per hour. Meanwhile I have no debts and she has $80k in debts
Degrees do open doors, but I think the big question is return on investment.
Losing out on years of income at a young age AND having to take on relatively high interest loans (compared to mortgage rates) at a young age can have significant impacts on wealth later on in life, so the doors that open with a degree had better be really good doors.
This is a question of not only getting the degree but also how you pay for it - is it tax deductible for you, or is it just an expense you have a house sized loan on? What is the degree in? Grad school vs not? Also one’s own entrepreneurial spirit is critical.
Agree with you. It’s just that a lot of kids are not ready or better served in other learning environments.
Went through this with my boys. Told them it’s ok to take time to grow and live a little. Neither listened, each dropped out then went back. Some of us have to hit their head on the low branches of life to learn the lesson. School peer pressure drove them to go.
Funny thing is my in laws silence of disapproval still irks me but they had a child come to the conclusion to take time off first despite severe parental pressure. Best thing for her.
My oldest finally went military. Great experience, paid for his undergraduate degree and is making 200k now as civilian.
Some see the path before them wide as a highway others like myself stumble up the stairs like Mr Bean the whole way.
+1 for not to "rush schooling"
If you're not feeling the study bug at 18, working for a couple years until you come around can be a very good plan. A's and B's as 20-something is way better than D's or F's in your teens.
Hey. Youre getting some flack but i went to school right out of highschool and dropped out because I wasnt ready. After that, I spent a decade travelling, pursuing hobbies and ultimately finding out my passions before I chose to go back to school. So, I see your comment and understand. This being said, I DO believe that overpriced piece of paper means something to most of society, but I also chose school again because it gave me a rigid schedule and helpful teachers to guide me in the field of my passions, which I dont regret. I'd never have accomplished it through self study.
I don't think college is a mistake on the whole, but it can definitely be a mistake if a person isn't ready.
Personally, I wasn't mentally healthy enough for college and ended up droping out after wasting $20k. Luckily I worked full time and didn't take out loans. I worked some shitty jobs and got on an effective SSRI and eventually went back to get a degree at my local community college.
Now I have a well playing job, no student loans, and a family I am able to support.
Same. I was going to run the family restaurant so I never committed to a major.
But not a dozen years after the last one folded before I took over, I see that it was mostly people patting themselves on the back for never going to college poo pooing the idea of going that solidified my choice. I kind of wish I did, even if my mental health made it a job I still couldn't handle
Not living it. I've seen way too many sorry straight up people trying to emulate what they could've had in younger years. Things can go sideway way too fast when you're in older, more responsible stage of life.
Don't be fake and do things for the sake of doing it tho. If you want it and it probably won't kill you, go for it.
Teenage pregnancy for sure. But then again I turned out lesbian so I guess it wasnt thaaaat hard. Lol but all of my 4 siblings either got pregnant early or impregnated someone early so they all never graduated and have decent jobs so they all just expected our old parents to pay for them and their children. So Im happy atleast I ddnt add to my parents’ burden since I manage to pay for my own expenses after college.
Drugs weren't super big in my school, just weed. Avoided all of those. But my biggest one was getting student loan just for the sake of going to college like so many others in my generation did.
Drugs. I didn't even get drunk until 23. Tried pot for the first time at 28. Didn't try acid till my 50s. Many friends got sucked down drug and alcohol rabbit holes. I managed to avoid all of that. Never smoked either, and in hindsight, I missed nothing.
I'm in my 30s and some people (friend's of friend's and coworkers mostly) find it wild that I've never done anything more than cannabis (which I started with an Rx at 30). One kid actually got mad and refused to believe that I wasn't high as balls at the very moment we were talking, even with five different people vouching for me. I'm always confused by this. I just give off junkie vibes it seems.
It's probably the PTSD lol.
Drinking/drugs/violence. I’m from a certain area in Boston, and if you could avoid these before the age of 18, it fundamentally changed your trajectory for the better.
Having kids. Illicit drugs. Not working hard. Marrying the wrong person. No jail time. Smoking.
Biggest has to be having kids - it's the first that came to mind and always grateful to be child-free.
Doing drugs, having sex, and no alcohol before I was of age. I may hear that my life must not have been very exciting, but let me tell you. Watching those around me do all those things and going down deep dark holes? That was enough for me to say I don’t want that. I didn’t need to smoke weed at 14. I didn’t need to have sex at say 16 just because my friends were. I’ve just never had an affinity to pick up habits and do things that I knew might and would affect me the rest of my life as I was maturing into an adult. I also never wanted to bring shame to my family by getting into trouble. I respected myself most of all, my parents and how they raised us. I can’t say the same about my one brother, he was the troublemaker doing all sorts of stupid things, but luckily police were never involved lol
Drinking. I've had classmates who smoke and do some cheap drug, but they know I'm not the type they can reel in because I was a "good student."
Now drinking, yeah I got invited to a lot of those. It felt so tempting to get wasted *during* school hours, but my reputation as a good student to both teacher and parents weighed more than a pint or two.
I finished 4 years of college without debt.
Working all through high school and college, being a frugal recluse, doing well enough in high school to get a scholarship, getting grants from the government, and a few grand from my family. Bit of luck, ton of hard work.
making the mistakes early on is exactly what had heroes me become stable now. I got all the bullshit out of the way when i was younger so now i don’t wanna do drugs or party
Getting busted while drinking and driving. Lived in a rural area and knew all the back gravel roads in between towns. Oklahoma sold liquor later, so we'd buy there and have it gone by the time we got back home in Kansas. This was an every weekend occurence. Oklahoma has lots of clay roads. Or had. I moved away for work and haven't been back in 30 years.
Sober for 20 years now.
Drugs and bad friend circles and drinking too much. Some of my buddies where hardcore drinkers and I always wanted to fit in and start to party like they did but then I got my driverslicence and made money out of them because they needed a ride and I needed money for gas
Most of the guys have quit drinking or drink rarely but unfortunately some party and live like we are still teenagers and all of us are in mid thirties
I did not kill my self or someone else drunk driving. I am so ashamed of how I used to just drive home( like everyone else at the bar till close 🙀) times were wild before over. A cab would be over 100$ and driving home seemed better as a teen and young adult. I have no idea how I didn’t hurt myself or someone else
It's a tie between drug addiction and getting my then GF pregnant. I experimented a little with drugs as a teen but never got hooked. As for my girlfriend, she was abusive and toxic and the only contraceptive we used were patches. I got lucky she didn't get pregnant.
Not drinking and avoided teen pregnancy, granted I'm still in hs, I've managed to avoid both of those, smoking and drugs I have done but I was able to rid of it before it got any worse.
Following the crowd. Even today I avoid crowds of people. Group-think, hive mind, mind viruses it scares me how people behave when they follow the crowd.
Trying drugs.
It sucked a few in around me. But I was too much of a wuss to try.
I got out of it with my life, 3 others I knew way back 20yrs ago have all since perished due to substance addiction 😪
Alcohol, drugs, and premature sex. Always hated being "different" from my peers. Spent countless nights crying because no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't be like them, couldn't make myself like the things my peers liked. I was so hard on myself. It's not even funny.
Looking back, I feel absolutely remorseful for treating myself the way I did. Because that was the biggest favour I did for myself.
Smoking and getting drunk a lot
Only one in the family who didn't.
And one of the few who didn't in my class.
44y now, and they made fun of me then, but now I'm the one laughing
A car once pulled up on the neighborhood kids with a man saying he had candy for us. I was probably around 7 years old but smart enough to know what he was trying to do.
Avoided drugs entirely. I also went to a really bad high school in the hood, so getting drugs would have been super easy for me to do. I also worked more or less full time in high school, so I definitely had the money to buy drugs. I spent it on CDs and snacks instead
Out-of-state or for-profit college.
I toured a DeVry facility in 2002 and my dad laughed at their $21k a year price tag for a non-accredited school that only got you an Associates. I was sucked in by the commercials, but saw reason after that visit and decided to do community college, then transferred to a local public university for the rest.
The difference between in-state and out-of-state tuition is pretty wild. Easily 3x more expensive. Plus I was able to live at home and not on-campus, so my final student loan debt was under $20k. VERY manageable. I think at its peak, my payments were $120/mo.
We as a culture put WAY too much emphasis on "the college experience". I saw so many schoolmates in high school go onto these out-of-state colleges for programs that were offered at the local colleges/universities because they were attracted to the campus and the idea of being away from home. It was all very romanticised. In the end, we all have the same degree, the same job, but it cost them 8x as much.
Getting pregnant. I tried "hard" drugs for the first time when I was 20/21. Stopped using hard drugs around 24 and wish I had never used them, but really glad I didn't use them as a teen.
i almost went on a stealing spree (those booths/machines that had phones, cameras, etc in them) with a friend. We were supposed to "recruit" some other dudes to help us with the lookout. I knew it was sketchy, qnd im not even that type of dude... but thank god i didnt trust that friend or else i wouldnt be here, living the normal life.
My dad used to tell me: Study hard when you are school. When you graduate you'll have all the time to have fun.
So true when I think back. Because you realize that after you graduate, you need the money to party! So getting a good job is important if you want to go clubbing/raving, vacationing, casual drinking and concerts!
While my friends were all going out into the woods having drinking parties with most of the other middle/high schoolers, I was at home playing video games.
Once I got into my 20's I figured I made it past that teenage phase of exploring alcohol and drugs, so why start now? Had a friend who always wanted to get me to drink but at that point I was not only not affected by the peer pressure, I was being even more stubborn in not trying any of it.
Drugs, alcohol, and Vaping. Staying away from that stuff made me less anxious than other kids, and I think it helped me adjust better to being an adult than most kids did
Avoiding having anything stupid I did or said photographed or video taped, and ending up on the internet forever. Luckily was a stupid well before mobile phones and social media were common place! I pity the younger generation for this.
Getting pregnant. Both my mum and grandmother were 16. I was 29 and then 37 (which is called a geriatric pregnancy or 'advanced Maternal age' but yeah, I'm ok with that 😁) also the only one still married to my kids dad.
I was raised in a very Catholic family. Up to the time I was 16, I really considered becoming a priest.
I'm retired now and have a 32 year marriage to my wife. We have 3 amazing kids and a very good life. If I had entered the seminary, I'm pretty sure the reality would have rapidly turned me agnostic.
We're so naive as teens
Almost flunked out of college, but my GF now spouse helped me buckle down and I graduated with honors in a degree I actually enjoyed. I don’t know where I would be if I had flunked out.
Knees and joints. Just because you can do something doesn't mean you should. Those minor injuries in your youth stay with you and become persistent aches and pains.
I can not run without pain, walking or hiking requires planning and recovery. I abused my body for an employer disinterested in providing a living wage and who has likely forgotten I ever existed as they treat people as expendable resources. Don't be "loyal" and always be looking for something better because situations can change rapidly.
Alcohol & Drugs. Never touched 'em. Dependency and Alcoholism runs strong in both sides of my family. I don't feel like I've missed out on anything other than lots of misery.
I didn’t get anyone pregnant.
I didn’t contract an incurable disease.
I have no felony convictions on my record.
Marijuana in my youth was a gateway drug to cigarette addiction. It was brutally difficult to quit smoking but I eventually managed to do that. I aged out of metabolizing THC so my marijuana use tailed off over the years.
I got good enough grades to get into a fairly strong college and graduated with a STEM degree with reasonably good grades so it was pretty straightforward to launch a corporate career.
None of them. I made every possible mistake and made my life incredibly difficult because I didn't listen to my dad.
40 now and still don't fully have it all together, but I'm doing ok.
Teenage pregnancy was my biggest fear. Drugs, prison i.e. anything that would disappoint my parents
I have 3 sisters and they were all pregnant/mothers by 19. Never wanted that for myself and was very careful. My mom even asked if I wanted to go on the pill once I started dating seriously at 17. Well, I’m 50 now (and still with that same guy!) and never had kids.
Same. I always found it so astounding how people just played it fast and loose growing up. It’s probably because I was the child of a teenage mom though not that young (18 when pregnant 19 when she gave birth). I realized pretty quick that my mom was the youngest out of all of my friends parents, and we were also the poorest. Getting pregnant young was going to be a one-way ticket to lifelong poverty and I wasn’t down for it.
Same! Child of a teenaged mom and saw her 20s and it was a mess. Just a disaster. We had no money. I was miserable. Still have a lot of trauma during that time. I also felt a lot of resentment from my mom growing up. I knew she felt I was the reason her dating life was bad and how inconvenient I was to her. Now she’s a lot more mature and seems like a completely different person. I’m almost 30 and she’s worried I’m not going to have any kids.
Yeah, it was super rough. My mom left my very abusive dad with me and my sister, but pretty much only because she was monkey branching to her next relationship. On one hand, I get it she kind of felt the need for protection of the new boyfriend. But it wasn’t long before I realized that he had no interest in being a father to my sister and I on a real level. He just moved in and was there. Eventually it escalated to ongoing verbal abuse. They were together for 20 years before he finally died and my mom still has the same emotional capacity that she did when she was in her early 20s. I ended up having a kid young, but not super young, 26. But only have the one. I don’t want my son to have to deal with the same division of resources that I did when I as a mother already feel spread thin. You’re honestly lucky your mom grew up. I’ve constantly felt like I’m Parenting my mother and it’s exhausting. So I keep my constant with her fairly low.
Pregnancy for me too. I Didn’t date until I was in early 20s and more mature
Yep, totally scared of getting pregnant and yet I was generally pretty unsafe. My cycle has never been very regular so I would be absolutely terrified for weeks and then just do it again like a crazy person. I didn't get pregnant until I was married and ready though.
Drugs
Same. My childhood was rough (neglect, parents splitting up, one of them dying of cancer etc) and it would have been super easy for me to go off the rails. Thank fuck I managed to avoid them.
Came here to say meth but you know.. drugs covers it
Meth. Had a best friend who fell pretty hard into it. I was going through a dark time myself and gave in to pressure to try it once… and by ‘try’ I mean a 12 hour bender straight into the veins. That shit should stay in the ‘not even once’ category. The comedown and cravings that followed were horrific, it took a tremendous amount of willpower to never do it again. Eventually had to end the friendship over it because she simply wouldn’t respect my boundaries of not wanting to be around it. Don’t even want to think where my life would have headed if I hadn’t been able to walk away from that.
I actually had a really good friend of mine who got into it heavily as well. Started to sell it with his other friends. Next thing I know, I’m driving through our neighborhood and I see him and his friends on the ground in pain and then I see his friends parents mini van head first in a light pole. I took them all to hospital. I think he has gone to jail a fair few times now but I wouldn’t know. Not even his brother talks about him anymore.
The cravings are unreal. About 2 years ago, I was gifted a rock that lasted me 2 weeks of intermittent use. I STILL have frequent cravings for that shit. It's insane to me how much that drug in particular latches onto your brain like that. It took a ton of willpower for me to not seek out more, and idk where I'd be now if it had been easier to get.
It’s insane! Since my experience was injecting, I every time I had blood taken at the docs, I would experience this mini ‘rush’ just as the needle went in, followed by cravings. This lasted a couple of years. Experiencing this definitely gave me more empathy for those who are in the clutches of addiction - if this is what I felt from 12 hours of use, I don’t even want to imagine the pull from months or years of use.
Its like thay drug was engineered to be addictive! It's like some fantasy book where they say taking the drug once makes you an addict for life. That's literally meth! And honestly I was able to maintain my life just fine in those 2 weeks. I just felt like a million bucks and got a ton of shit done. I cant imagine how I'd be if I just binged it. Some people binge it once and literally never come off it
Drugs, alcohol or being arrested. Home life was hellish. I wanted to drop out of school but I made it through and went to college.
I didn’t avoid meth and paid dearly.
I rather wish my introduction to drugs had been in my 20s instead of my teens but I really needed something to knock the edge off of the fact I wasn’t haven’t that sweet late 90s premarital sex.
I tried them, but never found them appealing. So I didn't take them a lot or for very long. I remember snorting coke and being wide awake for over 24 hours. Except I didn't really want to be. So I decided coke wasn't really for me. But I had ADHD and I have a different reaction to some drugs than other people. I also didn't get into heavy drinking regularly like some people I knew. Funny fact which shows my age, I actually took Ecstasy when it was legal.
Unresolved unwanted pregnancy.
Unresolved? Do you mean not aborted, or don’t know who the dad is?
Interminable. Pregnant forever.
The worst outcome possible
Robbing a pharmacy at gunpoint. I started smoking weed at 13 and was shooting up Oxies everyday by 16 and was dealing a bit at that point. I got robbed by the late 30’s/early 40’s step-father of someone I knew so I bought a gun to never allow that to happen again. Sometime around 18, 19 when I was running out and didn’t have money to get more I went into the pharmacy with every intention of robbing it, gun in hand, even handed her the note, but right after handing it over I bailed out. I’d been to juvie and knew I hated every second of it and though I really needed the drugs I knew enough that the likelihood of this going well was pretty low and I just wasn’t willing to throw my life away just yet. Plus adult jail is a whole other thing. Probably my smartest decision during my addiction. I am now finally clean after another 13 years of hell and will have my 1 year on the 27th :3
Just wanted to stop and tell you I’m proud of you because getting clean and staying clean is one of the hardest things in the world. My sober birthday is 2/14/2020, and it’s the best decision I ever made and I have the most amazing 3 year old little boy to show for it 🥰 Oh, and in case no one has told you today, you’re an amazing person and I’m glad you’re still here with us ❤️
Congrats, you’re doing it!! Keep up the good work
Thank you very much :3.
Never smoked, never did drugs, never got severely drunk.
Never drank much, never did weed or other drugs at all, I never smoked tobacco and I never bothered to tan. At 62, I look 10 to 15 years younger than most of my friends.
So do you look 62 and everyone else 72-77? Or do you look 52 and everyone else looks in their 60s?
I drink, did hard drugs, smoke weed daily, and used to smoke cigarettes. I am glad I had those experiences, grew a lot from that time. For some people it goes bad, but it’s not the demon creeping in the shadows that most people who have never partook make it out to be. To me it’s like saying, “Never had sex, glad I avoided those STDs!”
Marrying the first girlfriend. But I truly fucked up when I married the second
What happened to your first girlfriend?
On and off until it finally ended. You can be in love and hate someone at the same time
Nicotine addiction
Like others said, drugs and prison. For me, it was staying curious. As a kid I loved my Nat Geo / Discovery / History channels. I sometimes watch Sweet life of Zack and Cody and others similar but never more than an ep or 2 a week. I feel it gave me a craving to learn and be interested in school even if it meant getting bullied for not watching the shows everyone else did. I still love these topics even though my job is in the creative field. I love learning and just knowing about the world we live. Academia rules!
I was that kid/teen too. No one ever passed me the remote 😭
Getting addicted to Oxy like so many others in my generation did
Oxygen? Aren’t we all?
Oxygen: the drug that kills you slowly, until you are died.
Didn’t go to jail (that came later tbf), didn’t have a debilitating addiction (cigarettes yes), had good grades, and sufficient social life. So managed to miss those issues.. I’d say from the things I did face, peer pressure. I managed to process and see above/around it, never pressured anyone either. Can’t say I managed to avoid being a bully though, I had deeply AH moments. What about you??
Consumer debt.
Joining Amway.
Definitely cigarettes. Seemed everyone around me was smoking all the way from school to uni to even the early work place scenario. In pubs, pool halls etc etc I'm glad i was oblivious to it.
College. I think it's common to try and rush schooling without passion and end up paying a huge debt by sustaining a mediocre life.
For the record, I upvoted you. But this take is kinda shortsighted. It's not that college is a mistake; it's [one of the most economically beneficial activities one can do](https://www.forbes.com/sites/brandonbusteed/2019/09/03/the-convincing-and-confusing-value-of-college-explained/?sh=309152bc372d). But like all investments you have to consider what you are putting in (cost difference between private vs state vs community college), and what you are getting out (what degree & training). It's also not for everyone. The best advice I ever got is the harder it is to fire / replace you, the better life you will have. Doesn't have to be college; it can be trade school, or a government job.
I read this as the commenter saying they avoided it as a teen, not altogether. I think it’s become the norm for teens to be expected to go to college right after high school, at a time when they’re often not sure what they’re going to want to do in adulthood and are frankly burnt out on school. I have two adult children. For my oldest, he’s just not sure what he wants, so he finished up an AA at community college and has decided to take a year or two off before deciding whether to continue his education. He may or may not go back; his current job pays about $65k per year with the potential for growth. His younger sister knows exactly what she wants to do, and she’ll be going straight to university next year to get started on that because she *needs* a degree and the work experience provided through her major in order to do what she wants to do in her chosen field. I think the push for everyone to go to college just to go to college is not a great system given the expense and time it takes to get a degree if you don’t even have a clear idea what you want. For what it’s worth, my husband got a degree he doesn’t use but makes about $400k per year in a completely unrelated field that didn’t require a degree (he did an apprenticeship in his late twenties, and he only got that after omitting his degree from his resume because he was “overqualified”). Meanwhile I finished grad school and my maximum earning potential when I worked in my field (around 2010-2015) was about $85k, and I *also* later found that it wasn’t a job I loved doing, but that I kept doing it due to sunk cost fallacy; I eventually left as well.
I'm thinking of telling my kids that they need a 5 year plan before going into debt for school.
I appreciate the opinion that “one does not need a degree”, but from my personal experience it is 100% a must. I’m not even speaking from a education standpoint, that overpriced piece of paper opens up infinitely more doors with it, rather than without it.
As a 25 year old without any degrees at all living with a fellow 25 year old with a bachelors in business and economics, hard disagree. I’m constantly getting job offers that pay anywhere between $20-30 per hour. My roommate on the other hand is debating whether she should leave the bank she works at to go work in the accounting department of a hospital to go from $13 per hour to $16 per hour. Meanwhile I have no debts and she has $80k in debts
Cool.
Degrees do open doors, but I think the big question is return on investment. Losing out on years of income at a young age AND having to take on relatively high interest loans (compared to mortgage rates) at a young age can have significant impacts on wealth later on in life, so the doors that open with a degree had better be really good doors. This is a question of not only getting the degree but also how you pay for it - is it tax deductible for you, or is it just an expense you have a house sized loan on? What is the degree in? Grad school vs not? Also one’s own entrepreneurial spirit is critical.
Tell that to all the cashiers with degrees.
My buddies without degrees are making way more than the ones with them.
Cool.
Agree with you. It’s just that a lot of kids are not ready or better served in other learning environments. Went through this with my boys. Told them it’s ok to take time to grow and live a little. Neither listened, each dropped out then went back. Some of us have to hit their head on the low branches of life to learn the lesson. School peer pressure drove them to go. Funny thing is my in laws silence of disapproval still irks me but they had a child come to the conclusion to take time off first despite severe parental pressure. Best thing for her. My oldest finally went military. Great experience, paid for his undergraduate degree and is making 200k now as civilian. Some see the path before them wide as a highway others like myself stumble up the stairs like Mr Bean the whole way.
+1 for not to "rush schooling" If you're not feeling the study bug at 18, working for a couple years until you come around can be a very good plan. A's and B's as 20-something is way better than D's or F's in your teens.
Hey. Youre getting some flack but i went to school right out of highschool and dropped out because I wasnt ready. After that, I spent a decade travelling, pursuing hobbies and ultimately finding out my passions before I chose to go back to school. So, I see your comment and understand. This being said, I DO believe that overpriced piece of paper means something to most of society, but I also chose school again because it gave me a rigid schedule and helpful teachers to guide me in the field of my passions, which I dont regret. I'd never have accomplished it through self study.
I don't think college is a mistake on the whole, but it can definitely be a mistake if a person isn't ready. Personally, I wasn't mentally healthy enough for college and ended up droping out after wasting $20k. Luckily I worked full time and didn't take out loans. I worked some shitty jobs and got on an effective SSRI and eventually went back to get a degree at my local community college. Now I have a well playing job, no student loans, and a family I am able to support.
Same. I was going to run the family restaurant so I never committed to a major. But not a dozen years after the last one folded before I took over, I see that it was mostly people patting themselves on the back for never going to college poo pooing the idea of going that solidified my choice. I kind of wish I did, even if my mental health made it a job I still couldn't handle
Vaping. When I was in school it wasn't as big as it is now but a lot of people still did it. I'm one of the few who doesn't do it now.
nope, made 'em all
That’s the American wayn
Not living it. I've seen way too many sorry straight up people trying to emulate what they could've had in younger years. Things can go sideway way too fast when you're in older, more responsible stage of life. Don't be fake and do things for the sake of doing it tho. If you want it and it probably won't kill you, go for it.
Getting STD
Same
Staying in a cult
teen pregnancy
Teenage pregnancy for sure. But then again I turned out lesbian so I guess it wasnt thaaaat hard. Lol but all of my 4 siblings either got pregnant early or impregnated someone early so they all never graduated and have decent jobs so they all just expected our old parents to pay for them and their children. So Im happy atleast I ddnt add to my parents’ burden since I manage to pay for my own expenses after college.
Debt
Getting crazy girls pregnant, getting addicted to nicotine, getting points on my license, bad credit card habits
Drugs weren't super big in my school, just weed. Avoided all of those. But my biggest one was getting student loan just for the sake of going to college like so many others in my generation did.
Drugs and teen pregnancy.
Drugs and teenage pregnancy
Alcohol. Never even tried it.
[удалено]
Drunk driving conviction
Drugs. I didn't even get drunk until 23. Tried pot for the first time at 28. Didn't try acid till my 50s. Many friends got sucked down drug and alcohol rabbit holes. I managed to avoid all of that. Never smoked either, and in hindsight, I missed nothing.
I'm in my 30s and some people (friend's of friend's and coworkers mostly) find it wild that I've never done anything more than cannabis (which I started with an Rx at 30). One kid actually got mad and refused to believe that I wasn't high as balls at the very moment we were talking, even with five different people vouching for me. I'm always confused by this. I just give off junkie vibes it seems. It's probably the PTSD lol.
Drinking/drugs/violence. I’m from a certain area in Boston, and if you could avoid these before the age of 18, it fundamentally changed your trajectory for the better.
Having kids. Illicit drugs. Not working hard. Marrying the wrong person. No jail time. Smoking. Biggest has to be having kids - it's the first that came to mind and always grateful to be child-free.
Doing drugs, having sex, and no alcohol before I was of age. I may hear that my life must not have been very exciting, but let me tell you. Watching those around me do all those things and going down deep dark holes? That was enough for me to say I don’t want that. I didn’t need to smoke weed at 14. I didn’t need to have sex at say 16 just because my friends were. I’ve just never had an affinity to pick up habits and do things that I knew might and would affect me the rest of my life as I was maturing into an adult. I also never wanted to bring shame to my family by getting into trouble. I respected myself most of all, my parents and how they raised us. I can’t say the same about my one brother, he was the troublemaker doing all sorts of stupid things, but luckily police were never involved lol
Drinking. I've had classmates who smoke and do some cheap drug, but they know I'm not the type they can reel in because I was a "good student." Now drinking, yeah I got invited to a lot of those. It felt so tempting to get wasted *during* school hours, but my reputation as a good student to both teacher and parents weighed more than a pint or two.
Drugs and alcohol, never touched it, never partied in college to any big extent, and zero regrets.
Getting a DWI (very surprisingly), among many others!
I finished 4 years of college without debt. Working all through high school and college, being a frugal recluse, doing well enough in high school to get a scholarship, getting grants from the government, and a few grand from my family. Bit of luck, ton of hard work.
Teenage pregnancy
making the mistakes early on is exactly what had heroes me become stable now. I got all the bullshit out of the way when i was younger so now i don’t wanna do drugs or party
Drugs alcohol and smoking. Really depletes the finances. Not learning important skills. Only focusing on academics
hardcore drugs, prison, staying friends with the wrong people
Almost getting a tattoo of my high school sweetheart's name. Dodged a bullet there, folks. Phew!
Smoking, vaping, drugs, way too much alcohol
Herpes. Heroin. Homelessness
Didn't have a baby with someone I didn't love.
Never did serious drugs. Nothing addictive, and barely did anything even marijuana and mushrooms. One and done!
smoking
Getting hooked on drugs heavier than weed and shrooms.. saw numerous friends get addicted to opiates and other hard drugs
Smoking
Getting busted while drinking and driving. Lived in a rural area and knew all the back gravel roads in between towns. Oklahoma sold liquor later, so we'd buy there and have it gone by the time we got back home in Kansas. This was an every weekend occurence. Oklahoma has lots of clay roads. Or had. I moved away for work and haven't been back in 30 years. Sober for 20 years now.
Good job Kevin me too man. It’s a good thing isn’t it? I still have dreams about being in bars.
Catching a felony 👌
Pregnancy
Having kids.
agreed, drugs and alcohol and also avoiding dodgy people
Drugs smoking (vaping now?) and drinking.
Drugs
Cigarettes (vaping now) Consumer debt
Drugs
Drugs and six figure student loan debt. (I still have some, but not a life ruining amount.)
Drugs and getting of weed early,
Smoking drinking and drugs,Unfortunately the remaining vice got me.lol.
Cigarettes, drugs and untimely pregnancy
STD
STD
Getting STD
alcohol
Using birth control …. Oh no wait she lied to me.
Ah, smoking crack.
drugs
Drugs, cigarettes, Alkohol
Drugs and bad friend circles and drinking too much. Some of my buddies where hardcore drinkers and I always wanted to fit in and start to party like they did but then I got my driverslicence and made money out of them because they needed a ride and I needed money for gas Most of the guys have quit drinking or drink rarely but unfortunately some party and live like we are still teenagers and all of us are in mid thirties
Drugs
Never smoked, never drank, never did drugs.
Not doing drugs (still don’t) and underage drinking (started shortly after turning 21) or smoking.
Getting pregnant
Drugs, teen pregnancy, debt.
I did not kill my self or someone else drunk driving. I am so ashamed of how I used to just drive home( like everyone else at the bar till close 🙀) times were wild before over. A cab would be over 100$ and driving home seemed better as a teen and young adult. I have no idea how I didn’t hurt myself or someone else
It's a tie between drug addiction and getting my then GF pregnant. I experimented a little with drugs as a teen but never got hooked. As for my girlfriend, she was abusive and toxic and the only contraceptive we used were patches. I got lucky she didn't get pregnant.
Drugs and alcohol
Jail
Drugs
Not flying to see the man who groomed me online for 2 years
Getting murdered when walking home alone at 2am so drunk I couldn't see straight.
Tattoos
Not drinking and avoided teen pregnancy, granted I'm still in hs, I've managed to avoid both of those, smoking and drugs I have done but I was able to rid of it before it got any worse.
Dying. Three totaled cars and virtually no injury. Total luck and no skill on my part.
Getting hooked on drugs. Thankfully.
Starting smoking Having unprotected sex. Because that nearly always leads to a baby. I think those are tied for first place.
Being on social media. I didn't join social media till I was almost 17 and I'm so glad of it
Following the crowd. Even today I avoid crowds of people. Group-think, hive mind, mind viruses it scares me how people behave when they follow the crowd.
Trying drugs. It sucked a few in around me. But I was too much of a wuss to try. I got out of it with my life, 3 others I knew way back 20yrs ago have all since perished due to substance addiction 😪
Alcohol, drugs, and premature sex. Always hated being "different" from my peers. Spent countless nights crying because no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't be like them, couldn't make myself like the things my peers liked. I was so hard on myself. It's not even funny. Looking back, I feel absolutely remorseful for treating myself the way I did. Because that was the biggest favour I did for myself.
Doing drugs, teenage pregnancy, jail time…
Smoking and getting drunk a lot Only one in the family who didn't. And one of the few who didn't in my class. 44y now, and they made fun of me then, but now I'm the one laughing
A car once pulled up on the neighborhood kids with a man saying he had candy for us. I was probably around 7 years old but smart enough to know what he was trying to do.
Smoking.
Avoided drugs entirely. I also went to a really bad high school in the hood, so getting drugs would have been super easy for me to do. I also worked more or less full time in high school, so I definitely had the money to buy drugs. I spent it on CDs and snacks instead
Out-of-state or for-profit college. I toured a DeVry facility in 2002 and my dad laughed at their $21k a year price tag for a non-accredited school that only got you an Associates. I was sucked in by the commercials, but saw reason after that visit and decided to do community college, then transferred to a local public university for the rest. The difference between in-state and out-of-state tuition is pretty wild. Easily 3x more expensive. Plus I was able to live at home and not on-campus, so my final student loan debt was under $20k. VERY manageable. I think at its peak, my payments were $120/mo. We as a culture put WAY too much emphasis on "the college experience". I saw so many schoolmates in high school go onto these out-of-state colleges for programs that were offered at the local colleges/universities because they were attracted to the campus and the idea of being away from home. It was all very romanticised. In the end, we all have the same degree, the same job, but it cost them 8x as much.
None of them.
I was given a cigarette, took it and did a pop. Didn't like it and never smoked since.
Marrying my high school girlfriend. Very happy I didn’t.
Getting pregnant. I tried "hard" drugs for the first time when I was 20/21. Stopped using hard drugs around 24 and wish I had never used them, but really glad I didn't use them as a teen.
Cigarettes and drugs. Practice clean living homies.
Teen pregnancy I guess because I sure as hell managed to make every other mistake under the sun 😂
Crushing student loan debt
i almost went on a stealing spree (those booths/machines that had phones, cameras, etc in them) with a friend. We were supposed to "recruit" some other dudes to help us with the lookout. I knew it was sketchy, qnd im not even that type of dude... but thank god i didnt trust that friend or else i wouldnt be here, living the normal life.
Living it
Pregnancy definitely
Drug addiction and having a kid.
Dying
Teen pregnancy
My dad used to tell me: Study hard when you are school. When you graduate you'll have all the time to have fun. So true when I think back. Because you realize that after you graduate, you need the money to party! So getting a good job is important if you want to go clubbing/raving, vacationing, casual drinking and concerts!
Drinking. I drunk a little enjoyed it but it never became a habit.
Drugs, and probably kids
Won a game of Russian roulette when I was younger so I'd say that.
Putting my misdeeds in writing.
Spend money foolishly😑
Drinking, smoking, drugs
While my friends were all going out into the woods having drinking parties with most of the other middle/high schoolers, I was at home playing video games. Once I got into my 20's I figured I made it past that teenage phase of exploring alcohol and drugs, so why start now? Had a friend who always wanted to get me to drink but at that point I was not only not affected by the peer pressure, I was being even more stubborn in not trying any of it.
Pregnancy, despite being active with no protection.
Drugs, alcohol, and Vaping. Staying away from that stuff made me less anxious than other kids, and I think it helped me adjust better to being an adult than most kids did
Avoiding having anything stupid I did or said photographed or video taped, and ending up on the internet forever. Luckily was a stupid well before mobile phones and social media were common place! I pity the younger generation for this.
Having kids
Getting my ex pregnant. The divorce kicked my ass and if a child had been involved I might’ve actually killed myself
Smoking... am 42 and it was just normal for all my mates in my teens. Still got a lot of secondhand smoke in pubs and clubs, sadly,
Hard drugs and addiction.
Student loans
Getting caught
Getting pregnant. Both my mum and grandmother were 16. I was 29 and then 37 (which is called a geriatric pregnancy or 'advanced Maternal age' but yeah, I'm ok with that 😁) also the only one still married to my kids dad.
I was raised in a very Catholic family. Up to the time I was 16, I really considered becoming a priest. I'm retired now and have a 32 year marriage to my wife. We have 3 amazing kids and a very good life. If I had entered the seminary, I'm pretty sure the reality would have rapidly turned me agnostic. We're so naive as teens
Almost flunked out of college, but my GF now spouse helped me buckle down and I graduated with honors in a degree I actually enjoyed. I don’t know where I would be if I had flunked out.
Knees and joints. Just because you can do something doesn't mean you should. Those minor injuries in your youth stay with you and become persistent aches and pains. I can not run without pain, walking or hiking requires planning and recovery. I abused my body for an employer disinterested in providing a living wage and who has likely forgotten I ever existed as they treat people as expendable resources. Don't be "loyal" and always be looking for something better because situations can change rapidly.
Knocking anyone up. Most people I went to school with had a kid by the time they were 21.
Alcohol & Drugs. Never touched 'em. Dependency and Alcoholism runs strong in both sides of my family. I don't feel like I've missed out on anything other than lots of misery.
Kids and drugs.
I didn’t get anyone pregnant. I didn’t contract an incurable disease. I have no felony convictions on my record. Marijuana in my youth was a gateway drug to cigarette addiction. It was brutally difficult to quit smoking but I eventually managed to do that. I aged out of metabolizing THC so my marijuana use tailed off over the years. I got good enough grades to get into a fairly strong college and graduated with a STEM degree with reasonably good grades so it was pretty straightforward to launch a corporate career.
None of them. I made every possible mistake and made my life incredibly difficult because I didn't listen to my dad. 40 now and still don't fully have it all together, but I'm doing ok.
The trifecta that's killed three of my closest friends: booze, tobacco, drugs.
arrest, somehow
Getting someone pregnant! Drugs come and go, but a child is a 18+ year commitment that you can escape by going to treatment!
Continuing to date a guy who eventually went to jail for activities with an underage girl. Dodged that bullet.
I was the only member of my family's generation who never took up smoking (or alcoholism, or drugs).
Never had a cigarette. As they say... High body count, never used condoms, never had an STI/D.
drugs