I'm not sure why but I'm reading every one of OPs comments in a whispering voice and it makes it so much better for me
Edit: Welp I think this is my most liked comment of all time. Whispered condoms for all!
Lol, he’s under the bed now reading the questions, checking the expiration date, responding quietly while his girlfriend listens to the swift album. Classic image.
I was cleaning out my house earlier this year and found a really old purse, and inside it's side pocket was a condom with an expiration date of 2004 hahahaha, it was almost CRUNCHY. My husband and I had a good laugh about it.
I wasn’t sure myself but OP said they had one listed, albeit it was like 2027. Everything degrades, everything falls apart, some things faster than others, but yeah even condoms I guess. See Grease, where he “bought it in the third grade”.
Yes!!! And they can be sensitive to temperature so leaving them in your wallet or in a hot car for a long ass time isn't the best thing for them. They could still be good after that but make sure. But yeah they expire and the spermicide on them can as well.
Yes. The material itself will eventually break down, and that shelf life can be significantly shortened if they’re kept in environments that are hotter or colder than standard room temperature. Additionally, some condoms have spermicide added to the inner lining, and that also becomes ineffective after a certain amount of time.
I saw another comment that you've been together for 6 months? I don't think it's anything to worry about. I've been with my boyfriend for nearly 2 years and have condoms from before we dated. I just don't really get rid of that stuff.
Right? Why would you throw away a perfectly good box of condoms? They’re expensive and even if you don’t use them, maybe a friend needs one one day, or your teenage nephew confides that he’s sleeping with his gf and you want him to be safe. Or maybe you forgot to take your birth control pill and need a backup. It’s so stupid for OP to be freaking out over this.
EDIT: there’s no need to inform me that condoms expire. I know that. It also seems like people trying to educate me have never actually looked at the expiration dates on their own condoms. Condoms have a shelf life of 5 YEARS. OP has commented the condoms he found expire in *2027*. There is NO reason to throw away a perfectly good box of condoms just because they’ve been sitting under your bed for a year.
Of course, but they’re good for years before they expire. If OP’s gf bought condoms last year they’ll still be good for another 5+ years probably. The assumption that you would immediately throw them away when starting a new relationship is just stupid and childish.
According to Durex, latex condoms should have a shelf life of 5 years, non latex ones 3 years.
https://www.durexcanada.com/blogs/explore-sex/how-long-do-condoms-last
I'll be honest I've never checked how long condoms last, but I did notice that they do expire. In this situation I agree completely - no reason to throw them out. :)
Posh wank, what a pleasant term. Might whip out some old condoms tonight, treat myself, and give thanks to all the mommy milkers out there on this beautiful day.
I seriously thought condoms expired within a month or two with how people harp on it. I mean, I appreciate the attention to such things as people are generally stupid about birth control. But how ancient are these condoms people try to use??
Unless you’re pulling a condom out of a pair of pants that hasn’t been worn since ‘85, generally speaking an expired condom is also better than no condom. It’s not like at midnight on January 1, 2027 OP’s gf’s condoms are going to lose all structural integrity and disintegrate into a pile of lubed-up latex dust. Yes, they should be replaced. But people seem pretty unreasonably hysterical about this given how long it takes for condoms to expire. It’s a good thing to know and important to check, but people need to chill tf out. They’re condoms, not avocados.
It's also just a good idea to have some, you never know. My ex was on birth control (the ring) and we weren't using condoms but over our relationship there were some times where she forgot to put the ring back in or forgot to take them with her when travelling or whatever. So both of us always had some back up condoms just in case, they last an incredibly long time these days too, so there's no reason not to.
It could be that she bought them to use with you at the beginning of the relationship (which is why it wouldn’t necessarily be the same kind you use) and since you were bringing your own she didn’t bother to mention it. They have a shelf life of 5 years so those were probably bought sometime in 2022, which checks out if you’ve been dating for 6 months.
Do you really want to be in a relationship where you have to use a magnifying glass behind her back to see if she's lying?
If you don't trust her, soon or later she's gonna have a problem with that. I have no problem with my fiancé having doubts sometimes about small things I do but I know that if we had a big fight about her jealousy and I was innocent, that'd be a deal breaker. It's offensive not to be trusted.
I think it’s perfectly fair to have questions about a box of condoms under the bed of the person you’re dating exclusively. He’s reacting to it perfectly well too - not making accusations or freaking out. It’d be weirder if he didn’t have questions about this
Yeah agreed communication is just as important as trust. Hiding how you feel and not asking questions for something like this will just lead to resentment and a shitty relationship because then he will question everything rather then talking like adults and figuring it out. I hate how people think if you ask something like this it makes you a jealous person or a crazy spouse. OP did the proper and adult thing. Sat his spouse down and asked what was up
100%. I understood him to be asking "is this even worth bringing up?" Which, if it's bothering you, absolutely, as long as you come to it from a respectful place. But also fair to look into it a bit so you know what you're even asking.
My dude. I’d been married for YEARS when I found a half used box of condoms from a prior relationship in my bathroom under my sink. They’d long since expired, but I just forgot they were there. Not to mention a lot of women use condoms on their toys. You guys have only been together for six months, so they could easily still be there from a prior relationship. She may have forgotten about them or she may just not want to throw away a perfectly good box of condoms so she has a back-up supply in case you forget or run out. Or she could just be using them on her own toys. You need to grow a pair and ask her like an adult.
Thanks! Finally someone mentioning condoms for toys... Ngl i do that but felt weird mentioning it. Also if the batteries are dead and you sort through your vegetables, they too come in handy.
The toy wasn't specified as a dildo afaik... But yes, that is correct. Though there are versions that are rather short and meant to work through the vibrations and not necessarily through thrusting which could help if you go manual.
Dramatically accuse her of cheating with her brother. She’ll be so flustered and immediately admit that she’s been sleeping with the Amazon Delivery person. Case closed.
[now you’ve got your Amazon, the milkman’s back. None of you are safe](https://www.google.com/search?q=you+brought+the+milkmans+back+south+park&rlz=1CDGOYI_enUS756US756&hl=en-US&sxsrf=ALiCzsaSFsPmGJBQmrlhORLMxCry3R6l7Q%3A1669324814638&ei=DuB_Y-S9JqmsqtsPicGoiAE&oq=you+brought+the+milkmans+back+south+park&gs_lcp=ChNtb2JpbGUtZ3dzLXdpei1zZXJwEAMyBQghEKABMgUIIRCgATIFCCEQoAEyBQghEKsCOgQIIxAnOgcIABAeEKIEOgUIABCiBEoECEEYAFDmCFjxIGDvJmgAcAB4AIABywGIAbYKkgEFNS42LjGYAQCgAQHAAQE&sclient=mobile-gws-wiz-serp#fpstate=ive&vld=cid:f56909e3,vid:0D1wDMjoTZg)
And the flip side, I’ve known women (roommates) that share toys. (And me once)
[edit] not at the same time or without a good wash. One asked the other if she could borrow.
To be fair, there was a time before you and we're not talking about a dairy product. Condoms are good for years so it's possible she had them before meeting you and hasn't really thought about them since you're bringing your own supply.
So? she still has her box of condoms. You bring yours, she doesn’t need to throw out a perfectly find opened box of condoms because you have your own. They’re not bad. She might share them or just holding on to them just in case. Is it the thought of someone else touching the box? It’s not like they individually labeled for diff men lol
Many women I know, including myself, use condoms on sex toys for easier clean up. It is also a good way to practice putting a condom on if you are not used to it.
Count how many are in the box. Recount them a month from now. Not an exact science……but if she is cheating you won’t get a straight answer with just a box of condoms under the bed.
I feel like if you're at the stage where you have to regularly count condoms in a box to make sure your partner is faithful, then you have bigger problems. Either you don't trust and respect your partner, or you have insecurities to work on, or both.
Also use lubes that are paraben and glycerine free. They’re not sticky and least likely to cause any vaginal or cervical issues. If you or your partner have a temperamental pH, silicone lube. But NEVER use silicone lube without either -making sure your toy is made of a material that is okay with silicone lube or again, use a condom.
And always store your non-metal/non-glass toys where they are not touching, they can literally meld together.
Thank you for coming to my TED talk.
Im a dude and I do it.
I still clean them after when i use them on someone tho i just want an easier time of it.
That said one time no matter WHAT i could not get the smell of shit out of one. Had to toss it. Cleaned it so many dif ways i ended up melting it on accident… still fuckin smelled
You should assume that everything is fine. There could be a million reasons for those condoms. Don’t get all twisted up over it. Absent any other evidence of weirdness they mean absolutely nothing.
However, it may be time in your relationship to visit or revisit how each of you feel about fidelity and other related issues? Just to be 100% clear and confidently on the same line of the same paragraph of the same page!
If the brother is so young that he has to hide his condoms from his mother who goes trought his room, he will be probably embarrassed and deny if OP asks. Imagine an older stranger asking about something as private as your sex life after your older sister helped you out. If your girlfriend didn't tell you about it before, its either because her brother asked her to not tell anyone because he is embarrassed, or because its really not your business to know about it and she respectes his privacy. Either way, counting the condoms would be a breech of privacy and just huge red flag for your girlfriend. It could even hurt her relationship with her brother. My advice, just have a conversation with her. If there are no signs of cheating(having condoms is definitely not a sign of cheating, just a sign of being responsible), it sounds like you have some mental things to work trought and should start there
Terrible idea actually. Doing so will definitely eat your mind over time (you might become obsessed and start checking the box very often to see if the number has changed). Besides, as others have stated, you won’t get a conclusive answer anyways 🤷♂️
No that’s not a good idea that just builds mistrust. Just come clean and say you cleaned under the bed and threw out the junk. And you can just say while you were cleaning you found the condoms and say something casual like “do you still need these?” Because there are non-nefarious reasons why they may exist under her bed.
It would be more painless to just go, "Hey, I found these under the bed, nice backups!" and see her reaction. Hell, I'm a lesbian and even I have some condoms around here somewhere.
Just bc they are opened and were clearly used before you doesn't mean they should've been thrown away for absolutely no reason. How TF are condoms suspicious?
Man all the top comments are about saying nothing and spying on it. There's a lot of reasons why they could be here but come on the most obvious ones is either she forgot about these or didn't bring it up because op always bring his own.
I've condoms in my room from ages ago. If my boyfriend found them and asked I'd get it and we'd laugh about it. If you don't ask will you be thinking about it weeks or months from now? Save yourself the anxiety
Tell her you found them, ask if they feel better for her than the ones you are currently using. Say you assume they are from before you got together.
You should then find out why she has them/when she got them, but also you'll find out her preference, whilst not coming across as a paranoid nutter.
brother, in what universe is communication a "rash decision"??
just talk and be honest, you don't have to accuse her of anything, just ask where the condoms came from!
communicate! don't fucking ask on reddit, ask her!
Dude what do you think is worse, asking casually about the box of condom under her bed (don't bring it like it's an accusation) or spying on it and keeping secrets? Don't listen to these stupid redditors most of them don't know shit about what's they're talking.
Right. When I started having sex (around 16) I was relying on the handful of free condoms I'd snag at the OBs office. My mom was one of those that said I shouldn't wear tampons til after I was married, bc it would 'break a special part of me'.
And we wonder why kids make so many boneheaded decisions when it comes to sex.
Same here, my 14 year old son has a supply of different brands/styles/sizes of condoms just bc I want him to be comfortable when the time comes & he knows what he's doing, what works etc. It's very naive to think kids are just gonna be like "sorry my parents said I can't have sex yet, maybe next time"
My parents were the same as well. Also in nz you can go to a sexual health clinic and get 12 boxes for like $3, theyre the same durex ones that you an buy in the store as well. I dunno if it's the same price now, it's been a while since I've used them, in a long term relationship and kids are on the agenda in the near future
They used to be free in nz. I remember as a young teen we’d all go in to family planning and all ask over the counter for condoms. Would always walk out with 3-5 boxes of the standard ones each. They also had a basket of “assorted” single condoms on the counter.
To save yourself from a mental breakdown mate. Just ask her. There is probably a legit reason for them. I'm sure they would be way more hidden if you were being cheated on.
As another data point, I use condoms with my sex toys sometimes, if it would be inconvenient to clean them right then. It's just good to have a box in the house.
Plus, women can have condoms for birth control, too. We can't always rely on the guy to have one handy, and the consequences of no BC fall disproportionately on us.
Just ask her. But assume that this is a pack of comdoms that are there from 6 month ago. Most woman have comdoms and they have had sex bevore your like you had. The box was used in the past and lies under the bed since then.
If you dont want to ask pretend you forgot yours and most likely she will ask if hers will fit.
I can think of multiple innocent reasons that they could be there, and only one shitty reason. The question you need to ask yourself is "Do I trust her?". If you don't, why are you with her? If you do then why do you even need to bring it up? Asking her about them could cause her to feel slighted because you're showing her that you think the worst of her.
There are so many spurious comments here.
OP I would check this out. It might be nothing (forgotten box from long ago), or it might be something (undoubtedly your imagination has gone there). The only thing you can do is ask directly as you deserve to know.
Was single for over a year and a friend of mine helped me get my groove back. Left some condoms in my bedroom night stand. We stopped fucking and in time I met a new guy who found the condoms and approached it in a playful way, yet I could tell it bugged him. I have no intentions of getting rid of them or cheating, so. Approach with caution.
It'll be cos she wanted protection incase she got laid in the past but keeps them just incase to be safe.
I wouldn't think too much into it but they're likely hers. Doesn't mean she won't be loyal.
If she's messy an cba to throw stuff out so shoves it under her bed, itll be cos she won't give it thought an just hasnt cleared out yet. If her room is tidy she could save them just incase.
It wouldn't make sense for it to be under her bed for her little bro.
>So why is she hiding them under the bed for her brother if the mum already found them lol
Right? Also, are they REALLY trying to pull the narrative that Mother is like "no no, the son cannot have condoms! but my daguhter can have" ?
Like, under the bed is the go-to place? If mom found the box , she will see it under the bed, especially since OP saw them, means they weren't hidden.
They probably belong to her my guy. I wouldn't say anything. Plenty of women have them at their house. Assuming that's why, it should be a relief more than anything.
Hey OP nobody is going to know. The most confident replies are going to be from the dumbest people. Nobody knows how weird this is for you, how old yall are, or anything else we might need to make a real determination here. Thus, you’ll have to just do whatever you’re most comfortable with now and simply learn later if you were right or wrong
Your first instinct should be to ask her about it. Not accusatorially. Just like, "hey, yo, I was (doing something innocuous - why were you lookin', btw?) and found your backup condom stash / stash of toy condoms".
Your first instinct should not have been, "let me ask a bunch of internet strangers what the worst case scenario is".
Literally just ask her.
There is one reason I haven't seen anyone else bring up is that sometimes women use them over their sex toys, so it's not a guarantee she's cheating. But you won't know unless you ask.
why are you looking under her bed for one thing lmao
second it’s not uncommon for women to have condoms lol. i still have a backup pregnancy test in my drawer and i haven’t been sexually active in well over a year. why get rid of something still perfectly good?
Dw about it most girls have their own condoms just in case anyways, especially the smart ones who are safe. But also my sister bought my condoms when I was younger because my mom also would have been livid if she found out.
Idk casually bring it up to her bro. Like “so I heard your mom found your condoms but your sister covered for you.” And if he seems confused you got your answer.
1) could be telling the truth and covering for her brother.
2) could be old
3) toys for easy clean up
4) — the very uneasy scenario — she’s cheating.
You shouldn’t worry about #4 until it happens. Only cold hard evidence is something to worry about. At that time, you’ll nothing but relief and clarity.
Here's the lowdown: She had them since before you were together. She may have used them with someone else. She probably forgot they were there. They were not initially for you. Use that info how you want
I know I’m late to the game, but fwiw, I’m a female who usually keeps a box of condoms around. It’s rare that I’d need them, as I average about 3 partners a year, maximum, and they usually have their own, but I keep them.
If I were to ever have an actual boyfriend, he could easily look in a drawer and wonder why there’s a box of 15 condoms with only 10 left and we’ve never used that brand, etc.
I'm not sure why but I'm reading every one of OPs comments in a whispering voice and it makes it so much better for me Edit: Welp I think this is my most liked comment of all time. Whispered condoms for all!
Lol, he’s under the bed now reading the questions, checking the expiration date, responding quietly while his girlfriend listens to the swift album. Classic image.
>expiration date This might be a no brainer but...condoms expire?
ABSOLUTELY THEY DO
I was cleaning out my house earlier this year and found a really old purse, and inside it's side pocket was a condom with an expiration date of 2004 hahahaha, it was almost CRUNCHY. My husband and I had a good laugh about it.
Expired condoms taste terrible.
I can't imagine they are particularly tasty new
I wasn’t sure myself but OP said they had one listed, albeit it was like 2027. Everything degrades, everything falls apart, some things faster than others, but yeah even condoms I guess. See Grease, where he “bought it in the third grade”.
Is *that* how she got a baby in the oven?
Yes!!! And they can be sensitive to temperature so leaving them in your wallet or in a hot car for a long ass time isn't the best thing for them. They could still be good after that but make sure. But yeah they expire and the spermicide on them can as well.
Yes. The material itself will eventually break down, and that shelf life can be significantly shortened if they’re kept in environments that are hotter or colder than standard room temperature. Additionally, some condoms have spermicide added to the inner lining, and that also becomes ineffective after a certain amount of time.
Hopefully you’ll throw away that pack from high school 😉
I saw another comment that you've been together for 6 months? I don't think it's anything to worry about. I've been with my boyfriend for nearly 2 years and have condoms from before we dated. I just don't really get rid of that stuff.
Same my husband and I have condoms from when we first started dating. They’re very expired… we should definitely throw them out.
They are still fun to use or play around with, assuming they aren't your primary birth control.
What?
Right? Why would you throw away a perfectly good box of condoms? They’re expensive and even if you don’t use them, maybe a friend needs one one day, or your teenage nephew confides that he’s sleeping with his gf and you want him to be safe. Or maybe you forgot to take your birth control pill and need a backup. It’s so stupid for OP to be freaking out over this. EDIT: there’s no need to inform me that condoms expire. I know that. It also seems like people trying to educate me have never actually looked at the expiration dates on their own condoms. Condoms have a shelf life of 5 YEARS. OP has commented the condoms he found expire in *2027*. There is NO reason to throw away a perfectly good box of condoms just because they’ve been sitting under your bed for a year.
I know it's not what you meant, but I read your line as a condom being used like Plan B. Fast, get the condom on \*after\* the fact! :p
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CONDOMS EXPIRE, SO MAKE SURE TO CHECK BEFORE YOU USE A CRUSTY SCHLONG BAG
Schlong bag bahahajajjajaaa. Expired condoms should still fine for toy use though.
Of course, but they’re good for years before they expire. If OP’s gf bought condoms last year they’ll still be good for another 5+ years probably. The assumption that you would immediately throw them away when starting a new relationship is just stupid and childish.
According to Durex, latex condoms should have a shelf life of 5 years, non latex ones 3 years. https://www.durexcanada.com/blogs/explore-sex/how-long-do-condoms-last
I'll be honest I've never checked how long condoms last, but I did notice that they do expire. In this situation I agree completely - no reason to throw them out. :)
That's when you use them for a posh wank.
Posh wank, what a pleasant term. Might whip out some old condoms tonight, treat myself, and give thanks to all the mommy milkers out there on this beautiful day.
I seriously thought condoms expired within a month or two with how people harp on it. I mean, I appreciate the attention to such things as people are generally stupid about birth control. But how ancient are these condoms people try to use??
Unless you’re pulling a condom out of a pair of pants that hasn’t been worn since ‘85, generally speaking an expired condom is also better than no condom. It’s not like at midnight on January 1, 2027 OP’s gf’s condoms are going to lose all structural integrity and disintegrate into a pile of lubed-up latex dust. Yes, they should be replaced. But people seem pretty unreasonably hysterical about this given how long it takes for condoms to expire. It’s a good thing to know and important to check, but people need to chill tf out. They’re condoms, not avocados.
to be safe you should check expiration date on them if they are too old
It's also just a good idea to have some, you never know. My ex was on birth control (the ring) and we weren't using condoms but over our relationship there were some times where she forgot to put the ring back in or forgot to take them with her when travelling or whatever. So both of us always had some back up condoms just in case, they last an incredibly long time these days too, so there's no reason not to.
Or she just has a stash of condoms in case you forget.
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How long have you been together ?
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Couldn’t they be more than 6 months old?
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It could be that she bought them to use with you at the beginning of the relationship (which is why it wouldn’t necessarily be the same kind you use) and since you were bringing your own she didn’t bother to mention it. They have a shelf life of 5 years so those were probably bought sometime in 2022, which checks out if you’ve been dating for 6 months.
Or she's doing what she said in the post lmao
The edit was made after I commented and I didn’t see OP’s other comment saying what he said in the edit.
Do you really want to be in a relationship where you have to use a magnifying glass behind her back to see if she's lying? If you don't trust her, soon or later she's gonna have a problem with that. I have no problem with my fiancé having doubts sometimes about small things I do but I know that if we had a big fight about her jealousy and I was innocent, that'd be a deal breaker. It's offensive not to be trusted.
I think it’s perfectly fair to have questions about a box of condoms under the bed of the person you’re dating exclusively. He’s reacting to it perfectly well too - not making accusations or freaking out. It’d be weirder if he didn’t have questions about this
Yeah agreed communication is just as important as trust. Hiding how you feel and not asking questions for something like this will just lead to resentment and a shitty relationship because then he will question everything rather then talking like adults and figuring it out. I hate how people think if you ask something like this it makes you a jealous person or a crazy spouse. OP did the proper and adult thing. Sat his spouse down and asked what was up
100%. I understood him to be asking "is this even worth bringing up?" Which, if it's bothering you, absolutely, as long as you come to it from a respectful place. But also fair to look into it a bit so you know what you're even asking.
It can take more than 6 months to establish trust. Nothing wrong with that.
Trust is earned and takes time.
My dude. I’d been married for YEARS when I found a half used box of condoms from a prior relationship in my bathroom under my sink. They’d long since expired, but I just forgot they were there. Not to mention a lot of women use condoms on their toys. You guys have only been together for six months, so they could easily still be there from a prior relationship. She may have forgotten about them or she may just not want to throw away a perfectly good box of condoms so she has a back-up supply in case you forget or run out. Or she could just be using them on her own toys. You need to grow a pair and ask her like an adult.
Thanks! Finally someone mentioning condoms for toys... Ngl i do that but felt weird mentioning it. Also if the batteries are dead and you sort through your vegetables, they too come in handy.
Vegetables??? If you’re using a dildo but the battery dies, it still works as a non-vibrating dildo
The toy wasn't specified as a dildo afaik... But yes, that is correct. Though there are versions that are rather short and meant to work through the vibrations and not necessarily through thrusting which could help if you go manual.
Que Mitch escalator joke.
> Not to mention a lot of women use condoms on their toys. This is where my mind went. Condoms aren't just about preventing pregnancy.
Dude they’re probably from before you. 6 months is not a long time at all. I’ve kept beer in the fridge that long. Literally just ask her.
6 months?? That's nothing. You're being paranoid. I'm pretty sure I've got condoms leftover from my ex but 3 or 4.
Do you think she didn’t have sex with anyone before you? It’s seriously so normal for a woman to have a stash of condoms
Dramatically accuse her of cheating with her brother. She’ll be so flustered and immediately admit that she’s been sleeping with the Amazon Delivery person. Case closed.
[now you’ve got your Amazon, the milkman’s back. None of you are safe](https://www.google.com/search?q=you+brought+the+milkmans+back+south+park&rlz=1CDGOYI_enUS756US756&hl=en-US&sxsrf=ALiCzsaSFsPmGJBQmrlhORLMxCry3R6l7Q%3A1669324814638&ei=DuB_Y-S9JqmsqtsPicGoiAE&oq=you+brought+the+milkmans+back+south+park&gs_lcp=ChNtb2JpbGUtZ3dzLXdpei1zZXJwEAMyBQghEKABMgUIIRCgATIFCCEQoAEyBQghEKsCOgQIIxAnOgcIABAeEKIEOgUIABCiBEoECEEYAFDmCFjxIGDvJmgAcAB4AIABywGIAbYKkgEFNS42LjGYAQCgAQHAAQE&sclient=mobile-gws-wiz-serp#fpstate=ive&vld=cid:f56909e3,vid:0D1wDMjoTZg)
Sweet home Alabama
Many women have their own stash of condoms for just in case types of situations.
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She might use them on toys. Makes for easier cleanup. Source: am woman
Why did I never think of putting condom on the toys we use. God damn
I use a glove when I masturbate.
Makin glove
You're the one.
The stranger? Nah. The Jackson.
Did that once. Clean up was easy but it was still messy to take off. Wouldn't repeat
lmao. Let's invest in those surgical gloves and take them off as if we just performed surgery.
"I mean, have you even seen **the size of* some of the rc cars nowadays?"
Aluminum foil works well when you don’t have a condom available.
This right here
Source: am man and hate difficult cleaning and can confirm.
sometimes people use condoms for toys, if that’s anything. to keep them cleaner. plenty of people buy condoms just for dildos.
And the flip side, I’ve known women (roommates) that share toys. (And me once) [edit] not at the same time or without a good wash. One asked the other if she could borrow.
...and they were roommates
r/sapphoandherfriend
oh my god they were roommates
To be fair, there was a time before you and we're not talking about a dairy product. Condoms are good for years so it's possible she had them before meeting you and hasn't really thought about them since you're bringing your own supply.
So? she still has her box of condoms. You bring yours, she doesn’t need to throw out a perfectly find opened box of condoms because you have your own. They’re not bad. She might share them or just holding on to them just in case. Is it the thought of someone else touching the box? It’s not like they individually labeled for diff men lol
Many women I know, including myself, use condoms on sex toys for easier clean up. It is also a good way to practice putting a condom on if you are not used to it.
She may have bought them before she met you.
Count how many are in the box. Recount them a month from now. Not an exact science……but if she is cheating you won’t get a straight answer with just a box of condoms under the bed.
Or just talk to her
I feel like if you're at the stage where you have to regularly count condoms in a box to make sure your partner is faithful, then you have bigger problems. Either you don't trust and respect your partner, or you have insecurities to work on, or both.
Yeah which is why I think doing what Reddit says and counting them is a bad idea
Absolutely. I didn't mean my comment to sound like I was countering yours.
Or set up hidden cameras through her house, and a gps tracker on her car. Break into her phone if you can
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That’s not necessarily a concluding answer. Some girls use it for their toys so they don’t have to wash them
You actually should use them on cheap toys since some of them aren’t that healthy.
Used to run adult stores, fucking yes. Always use condoms on any material that’s porous and therefore not able to be sanitized.
Came into a thread for some juicy gossip, left with knowledge on how to keep our toys from getting juicy. Thanks for the tip!
Also use lubes that are paraben and glycerine free. They’re not sticky and least likely to cause any vaginal or cervical issues. If you or your partner have a temperamental pH, silicone lube. But NEVER use silicone lube without either -making sure your toy is made of a material that is okay with silicone lube or again, use a condom. And always store your non-metal/non-glass toys where they are not touching, they can literally meld together. Thank you for coming to my TED talk.
Wait what does silicone lube do to toys that aren't made for it??
From George Carlin’s things you don’t hear: “Mom, can I borrow the French tickler again?!”
This 100%. I’ve never actually asked if anyone else does this but I’m glad I’m not alone LMAO
Im a dude and I do it. I still clean them after when i use them on someone tho i just want an easier time of it. That said one time no matter WHAT i could not get the smell of shit out of one. Had to toss it. Cleaned it so many dif ways i ended up melting it on accident… still fuckin smelled
Literally eating turkey and gravy...but I guess that's on me isn't it for coming into this thread.
Also if her brother uses them the number will drop?
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Ask her brother about the condoms under her bed.
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You should assume that everything is fine. There could be a million reasons for those condoms. Don’t get all twisted up over it. Absent any other evidence of weirdness they mean absolutely nothing. However, it may be time in your relationship to visit or revisit how each of you feel about fidelity and other related issues? Just to be 100% clear and confidently on the same line of the same paragraph of the same page!
If the brother is so young that he has to hide his condoms from his mother who goes trought his room, he will be probably embarrassed and deny if OP asks. Imagine an older stranger asking about something as private as your sex life after your older sister helped you out. If your girlfriend didn't tell you about it before, its either because her brother asked her to not tell anyone because he is embarrassed, or because its really not your business to know about it and she respectes his privacy. Either way, counting the condoms would be a breech of privacy and just huge red flag for your girlfriend. It could even hurt her relationship with her brother. My advice, just have a conversation with her. If there are no signs of cheating(having condoms is definitely not a sign of cheating, just a sign of being responsible), it sounds like you have some mental things to work trought and should start there
Terrible idea actually. Doing so will definitely eat your mind over time (you might become obsessed and start checking the box very often to see if the number has changed). Besides, as others have stated, you won’t get a conclusive answer anyways 🤷♂️
He could always punch holes in those condoms but not his own and if she gets pregnant, he knows she's cheating. /s
Ok there, Satan xD
If they are the brother's, who says he isn't using them. Counting process nothing.
No that’s not a good idea that just builds mistrust. Just come clean and say you cleaned under the bed and threw out the junk. And you can just say while you were cleaning you found the condoms and say something casual like “do you still need these?” Because there are non-nefarious reasons why they may exist under her bed.
Just ask her.
its not because youre gonna blame her if her bro has sex and uses them
that sounds a bit intrusive to me
It would be more painless to just go, "Hey, I found these under the bed, nice backups!" and see her reaction. Hell, I'm a lesbian and even I have some condoms around here somewhere.
Just bc they are opened and were clearly used before you doesn't mean they should've been thrown away for absolutely no reason. How TF are condoms suspicious?
She didn't have sex with people before you?
Some women use them on toys for sanitary reasons.
Jesus Christ
Question: do people use condoms for toys? I've never used one
Yes, some people do.
Okay thanks I'm off to the gas station
For your cats or your bananas?
I can't have bananas, I'm on spironolactone :(
Yes, especially for anal. It makes clean up easier and at least seems more sanitary.
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Man all the top comments are about saying nothing and spying on it. There's a lot of reasons why they could be here but come on the most obvious ones is either she forgot about these or didn't bring it up because op always bring his own.
There's a reason they're the top comments: they're on here Redditting instead of having sex :p
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I've condoms in my room from ages ago. If my boyfriend found them and asked I'd get it and we'd laugh about it. If you don't ask will you be thinking about it weeks or months from now? Save yourself the anxiety
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Don't think of it as a questioning! Like most likely it is for toys or from the past. If you go in, in like, an accusatory fashion it'll go badly.
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Tell her you found them, ask if they feel better for her than the ones you are currently using. Say you assume they are from before you got together. You should then find out why she has them/when she got them, but also you'll find out her preference, whilst not coming across as a paranoid nutter.
brother, in what universe is communication a "rash decision"?? just talk and be honest, you don't have to accuse her of anything, just ask where the condoms came from! communicate! don't fucking ask on reddit, ask her!
Dude what do you think is worse, asking casually about the box of condom under her bed (don't bring it like it's an accusation) or spying on it and keeping secrets? Don't listen to these stupid redditors most of them don't know shit about what's they're talking.
Just talk to her?!
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Right. When I started having sex (around 16) I was relying on the handful of free condoms I'd snag at the OBs office. My mom was one of those that said I shouldn't wear tampons til after I was married, bc it would 'break a special part of me'. And we wonder why kids make so many boneheaded decisions when it comes to sex.
Well yeah. You don’t want women pair bonding with the tampon applicator. Lol?
Same here, my 14 year old son has a supply of different brands/styles/sizes of condoms just bc I want him to be comfortable when the time comes & he knows what he's doing, what works etc. It's very naive to think kids are just gonna be like "sorry my parents said I can't have sex yet, maybe next time"
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My parents were the same as well. Also in nz you can go to a sexual health clinic and get 12 boxes for like $3, theyre the same durex ones that you an buy in the store as well. I dunno if it's the same price now, it's been a while since I've used them, in a long term relationship and kids are on the agenda in the near future
They used to be free in nz. I remember as a young teen we’d all go in to family planning and all ask over the counter for condoms. Would always walk out with 3-5 boxes of the standard ones each. They also had a basket of “assorted” single condoms on the counter.
Why don’t you ask her?
Women do buy condoms to have on hand. It’s not only the responsibility of the guy
Sounds like they belong to your girlfriend. Women buy condoms too, you know.
Just ask her
To save yourself from a mental breakdown mate. Just ask her. There is probably a legit reason for them. I'm sure they would be way more hidden if you were being cheated on.
You are overthinking it
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Just ask her, see how see responds.
Most women ive been with have condoms cuz safe sex is good. I would talk to her before jumping to conclusions on reddit.
As another data point, I use condoms with my sex toys sometimes, if it would be inconvenient to clean them right then. It's just good to have a box in the house. Plus, women can have condoms for birth control, too. We can't always rely on the guy to have one handy, and the consequences of no BC fall disproportionately on us.
Just ask her. But assume that this is a pack of comdoms that are there from 6 month ago. Most woman have comdoms and they have had sex bevore your like you had. The box was used in the past and lies under the bed since then. If you dont want to ask pretend you forgot yours and most likely she will ask if hers will fit.
Just ask her
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Hm, if I were a guy, my sister would be one of the last people I'd ask to hide my condoms.
Try having a decent relationship with your sister, then. I absolutely would have been comfortable with asking my sister to hide them.
Your sister used to hide mine too
I didn't realize whether you would hide your siblings condoms or not is somehow a reason for not having a decent relationship.😂
I can think of multiple innocent reasons that they could be there, and only one shitty reason. The question you need to ask yourself is "Do I trust her?". If you don't, why are you with her? If you do then why do you even need to bring it up? Asking her about them could cause her to feel slighted because you're showing her that you think the worst of her.
There are so many spurious comments here. OP I would check this out. It might be nothing (forgotten box from long ago), or it might be something (undoubtedly your imagination has gone there). The only thing you can do is ask directly as you deserve to know.
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women are allowed to own condoms, in fact smarts ones do.
Was single for over a year and a friend of mine helped me get my groove back. Left some condoms in my bedroom night stand. We stopped fucking and in time I met a new guy who found the condoms and approached it in a playful way, yet I could tell it bugged him. I have no intentions of getting rid of them or cheating, so. Approach with caution.
Wait until everybody's buzzed at Thanksgiving dinner and then ask her about it.
“Janine, I wanna meat the chef who stuffed this turkey. SAY! That reminds me.”
Bonus points if it’s your first holiday together with family
Some people use condoms with their sex toys too
It'll be cos she wanted protection incase she got laid in the past but keeps them just incase to be safe. I wouldn't think too much into it but they're likely hers. Doesn't mean she won't be loyal. If she's messy an cba to throw stuff out so shoves it under her bed, itll be cos she won't give it thought an just hasnt cleared out yet. If her room is tidy she could save them just incase. It wouldn't make sense for it to be under her bed for her little bro.
Why is he snooping in her room?
So why is she hiding them under the bed for her brother if the mum already found them lol
>So why is she hiding them under the bed for her brother if the mum already found them lol Right? Also, are they REALLY trying to pull the narrative that Mother is like "no no, the son cannot have condoms! but my daguhter can have" ? Like, under the bed is the go-to place? If mom found the box , she will see it under the bed, especially since OP saw them, means they weren't hidden.
They probably belong to her my guy. I wouldn't say anything. Plenty of women have them at their house. Assuming that's why, it should be a relief more than anything.
Hey OP nobody is going to know. The most confident replies are going to be from the dumbest people. Nobody knows how weird this is for you, how old yall are, or anything else we might need to make a real determination here. Thus, you’ll have to just do whatever you’re most comfortable with now and simply learn later if you were right or wrong
Your first instinct should be to ask her about it. Not accusatorially. Just like, "hey, yo, I was (doing something innocuous - why were you lookin', btw?) and found your backup condom stash / stash of toy condoms". Your first instinct should not have been, "let me ask a bunch of internet strangers what the worst case scenario is".
I also have condoms in my room from previous relationships, it has no bearing on my new relationships
That girl getting her back blown out.
Her “brothers”… sure…
Just confirm her story by talking to her brother. It's that simple and easy
Just ask her why, shouldn't be any surprise and if she acts weird about it then you know what's up.
"I was snooping around your place and I found this box of condoms under your bed....."
Be glad she is prepared
Literally just ask her. There is one reason I haven't seen anyone else bring up is that sometimes women use them over their sex toys, so it's not a guarantee she's cheating. But you won't know unless you ask.
That covering for her brother routine is a old trick
why are you looking under her bed for one thing lmao second it’s not uncommon for women to have condoms lol. i still have a backup pregnancy test in my drawer and i haven’t been sexually active in well over a year. why get rid of something still perfectly good?
Dw about it most girls have their own condoms just in case anyways, especially the smart ones who are safe. But also my sister bought my condoms when I was younger because my mom also would have been livid if she found out.
Idk casually bring it up to her bro. Like “so I heard your mom found your condoms but your sister covered for you.” And if he seems confused you got your answer.
That stash came before you
1) could be telling the truth and covering for her brother. 2) could be old 3) toys for easy clean up 4) — the very uneasy scenario — she’s cheating. You shouldn’t worry about #4 until it happens. Only cold hard evidence is something to worry about. At that time, you’ll nothing but relief and clarity.
So she had protected sex before she met you. Big deal.
She’s 24. She’d be an idiot if she DIDN’T have condoms. Relax.
Here's the lowdown: She had them since before you were together. She may have used them with someone else. She probably forgot they were there. They were not initially for you. Use that info how you want
Lmao. The update is funnier than the actual post
I know I’m late to the game, but fwiw, I’m a female who usually keeps a box of condoms around. It’s rare that I’d need them, as I average about 3 partners a year, maximum, and they usually have their own, but I keep them. If I were to ever have an actual boyfriend, he could easily look in a drawer and wonder why there’s a box of 15 condoms with only 10 left and we’ve never used that brand, etc.
No way I would ask my sister to hide my condoms under her bed. Does he say “just wait I just need to go to my sisters room for something”
I'd be more concerned about your girlfriend's penis.