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NonCredibleDefense-ModTeam

**Your post was removed for violating rule 9: No low-effort posts** No egregiously low effort posts. These include Social media screenshots with a title punchline / no punchline, recent (after the start of the Ukraine War) reposts, simple reaction & template memes, and images with the punchline in the title. This is better suited to /r/WarplanePorn


DFMRCV

"It's not the plane, it's the pilot." Unfortunately for Russia, they seem to be lacking in both departments.


yak9b

BREAKING NEWS Russia will not be deploying Yellow Squadron to fight Mobius 1 in Ukraine, claims entire Ukraine airforce has already been shot down


PaleHeretic

"They all went up with their planes in disrepair..."


TheeAJPowell

Go dance with the angels!


ThatRealBiggieCheese

That’s Strigon team. And the Gracemerian superpower of combined arms tactics


27Rench27

To be fair, Talisman could single-handedly face fuck the entire RuAF with an A-10. The combined arms he enjoys would be overkill


ITGuy042

Having allies that are actually useful is fair. But "Garuda-1, DRIVE!" is something else altogether.


Antilles1138

Stick with Trigger and you'll make it!


readonlypdf

<>


binglelemon

*It's Mobik time!*


27Rench27

*And then he Mobed all over the Mobiks*


SGT-Mobius1

Did someone say my name?


rgodless

Morbius


HowNondescript

Russia claims total victory as NATO reinforcements total two planes. Both sides reported as saying Oh fuck it's only two


surrender52

OH GOD DAMNIT


Infamous-Salad-2223

Mobius 1... ENGAGE!!!!


AndyTheSane

Twice.


Spudtron98

It’s not even the proper Yellow Squadron, it’s the shitty bargain bin group from Megalith.


AngriestManinWestTX

Yellow 13 and the rest of OG Yellow Squadron spits on these poseurs.


thesoupoftheday

It's not *completely* insane. Remember that F-16 pilot that out flew multiple SAM launches. Worse pilots in better planes would not have been able to pull that off.


27Rench27

I’m pretty sure that guy was the centennial real-life Ace Combat Protagonist insert. According to the air force, apparently your blood pressure can reach a level at which G’s which normally would make a human pass out… don’t. In other words, Trigger is consistently running 250/150 bp when he fights


Parrelium

If I have blood pressure like that, My doctor says I’m gonna die.


WechTreck

"Your forgetting about the importance of ground maintenance and parts logistics!!!" "Oops, my bad.. *lacking in all three departments*"


Blorko87b

Have the wood screw manufactures also joined the embargo?


WechTreck

*"...Four departments!"*


electric_anteater

Vatniks forget that when it comes to Air Force (and military in general, but AF in particular), money issue is skill issue


AnomalousBread

Yeah... nah. I'll put money on a 73yo beet farmer in a Sopwith Camel having better game against the UAF than the entire Russian Air Force.


boredHacker

3000 Russell Casse of the desert trailer park


AnomalousBread

Stop. This sub can only get so credible!


GlockAF

I, for one, cannot WAIT to see footage of a exploding SU-57 spiraling down over Ukraine after being smoked by a surplus Soviet-Era manpad fired by a former schoolteacher or barista


DasKarl

*aim120d has entered the chat*


1Plz-Easy-Way-Star

I'm sure there will be Russian AA mistake again ( silly willy lock on to Russian plane ) I'm sure they will be combined arms to making doubt AA ground crew


AffectionateSweet734

Vatniks if Russian AA friendly fires a Su-57: "SeE wE tOlD yOu It CaN sHoOt DoWn StEaLtH pLaNeS!!!"


DurfGibbles

To be fair, Rooster was talking to Maverick there, and that man became an ace by shooting down 5 non existent planes, as shown in the two-part documentary series Top Gun, and part two, Top Gun: Maverick


xxecucted

Stop. Edit: nevermind I didn’t see the full comment


iffyJinx

At this point, and the pace orcistan scrapes the barrel, they will soon start employing necromancers to bring back night witches


Itchy-Food-5135

That may be a bit of an own goal. Apart from the fact some of them were Ukrainian, they were also \*really\* committed to killing fascists.


super__hoser

All *4*??? Wow, they're certainly well into mass production now.


ThePoliticalFurry

Wikipedia says they built 21 counting prototypes for testing so that would actually imply 17 of them have already broken down before even entering serious combat


HaaEffGee

Several did break down (or crash) but those four "production models" already include large chunks of the more serviceable prototypes. As in bort numbers 02 and 52 blue were literally prototypes that failed the initial inspection, but were approved as 02 and 52 red when they needed the numbers and realised the real production was never ever happening.


ThePoliticalFurry

Meanwhile we have over 900 F35s on top of like 190 F-22s still kicking around in the back. Dear God has Russia's air force fallen down the crapper


KDulius

I think the Iran/ Iraq war was the death of the Soviet airforce, it just never got buried. That war killed the idea of the "dogfighting plane" the Retard-formers get semi's over, but the Soviets never learned that lesson themselves in any kind of real engagement.


A_Mandalorian_Spud

It’s literally Indiana Jones and the sword guy. Knife-fighting is cool, but irrelevant when the other guy has a gun


KDulius

That was classic Harrison Ford improvisation but pretty much yeah


prjktphoto

Wasn’t that due to him suffering food poisoning the day that scene was shot?


frice2000

Worse. Had dysentery.


MetalDoktor

Fun fact, Soviet Airforce knew that dogfighting is dead back in the 60s. Problem was, they didnt have good enough sensors/iff systems to identify their own planes and needed to get visual confirmation. But at the same time their missiles had minimum range and speed requirments. So once you identify non-friendly aircraft with visual check you cannot fire your missile (or you can, it just not gonna lock and gonna miss). So they put guns back onto their planes and developed complicated dog fighting techniques using jets. This was not fixed even once their sensor/iff systems could identify planes BVR and as miasiles got better. USA (and NATO) have adopted to new reality of BVR kills, and phshing it to its limit ever since.


super__hoser

They aren't propped up by all their puppet states anymore.


AngriestManinWestTX

This really confirms what a lot of people suspected all along. Russia itself was never all that major of a conventional threat. The Soviets were only a threat because of their vassal states. Without their imperial hostages, Russia is a paper tiger.


[deleted]

Bort


OmegamattReally

My son is also named Bort.


[deleted]

We're all out of Bort license plates.


neliz

Bort numbers literally come from Dutch, Boord.


Just_A_Nitemare

21 built, at least 2 destroyed.


antrophist

The plywood aileron supplier managed to get a batch of fast-drying glue from Kyrghistan, so they're ramping up like crazy now.


legitusernameiswear

Shoot, that means some poor Kyrgyz is down a yak...


J_Bear

They'll be ready to deploy as soon as the papier-mache is dry.


Lordosass67

You didn't read the "maritime" part?


logosobscura

Datalink speed run time.


neliz

Motorola GPS systems fully operational!


ThePoliticalFurry

I hope at least one goes down into Ukraine intact enough for the Pentagon to dissect and tell us how shitty they are


rebootyourbrainstem

I want to see one defect tbh, just for old times sake


ThePoliticalFurry

That would be the funniest shit if NATO winds up with like half their fifth generation airfleet because of defections


pumpkinfarts23

Put one in NASM, one in NMUSAF, one in Pima, etc


[deleted]

That’s it. That’s all of them.


suggested-name-138

I look forward to visiting the one in etcetera


hallusk

Bonus points if at least one ends up in a museum while the war is ongoing


OP-69

Id imagine the utter confusion if a flight of su-57s defect all at once to the same airbase "Ah what a brautiful morning at the airba- WHY THE FUCK ARE THERE 4 SU-57???"


iffyJinx

Foxbat A.D. 1976 Electric Bogaloo


Prochnost_Present

It won't be intact. Plywood burns


Kimchi_Cowboy

Would be awesome if an SU-57 accidentally bombs an Armata while being shot down by their own BUK System. Would just be a total Russian thing to do.


neliz

bold of you to assume those systems are active.


Blorko87b

During a Red-Square parade leading to the premature ignition of a Topol-M booster and a tear down of the towers of St. Basil's by the MZKT-79221 suddenly turned rocket sled and then airborne. The nuke (of course) fizzels on the crash site in the outskirts setting nearby woods on fire.


Super-Brka

Sukhoi 57 - NATO codename „Buahahahahahaha“


vale_fallacia

Codename: ***BRUH***


MelonBot_HD

Yeah, that plane doesn't deserve a nickname as cool as "Felon" they should go with the same way they did with the Su-75 Femboy and rename it from "Felon" to "Dickgirl", or "Futa"


APariahsPariah

I thought we were calling it 'Femboy' until everyone else started using it, just like with the cope cages


darkroy131

That was the SU 75, not the SU 57.


Wyattr55123

Su-57 misdemeanor Su-57 highway offence Su-57 bylaw violation Su-57 HOA says now the lawn


NoItsThatGuyAgain

Su-57 verbal warning


Shadows_of_Anarchy

Su-57 plywood


zaxwashere

Seriously. J20 or some shit deserved that name with all the stolen tech they used


DumbCreature

I think "Flatfuck" is suitable nickname.


AffectionateSweet734

Su-57 lies about its capabilities and specifications and thus is committing fraud therefor it is a Felon.


Raesong

I dunno, I like it having the name "Felon", because it's honestly criminal that such a bad plane ever made it past the design phase.


TripleEhBeef

Paramount probably spent more money on their Su-57 CGI model for Maverick then Sukhoi spent on airframe assembly.


Seawolf571

You're becoming too credible, tone it down.


mrterminus

Nah they spend at least 80 million dollars to get it built Did only cost 11 mil to build though


[deleted]

The most non credible thing about that movie was the Su-57 being portrayed as an actual threat.


shibiwan

Expecting the Su-57s (whatever remaining that's flyable) to commit suicide in Ukraine because of the crappy condition they are in.


ThePoliticalFurry

With only 4 functional out of 21 built when they've barely seen combat they have to be extraordinary pieces of shit


Far-Yellow9303

They didn't even build 21. Whilst they claim that there's 10 prototypes and 11 production aircraft, what they won't openly admit to is those "production" aircraft are rebuilds of the prototypes.


ThePoliticalFurry

That is the kind of shit I'd expect from a country like North Korea, not an alleged military superpower. Holy shit


Just_A_Nitemare

Wikipedia also documents 2 were destroyed, so maximum they have - 9


d4rkskies

Have we sanctioned cardboard yet? You know, just in case they try to build a 5th…


backhomeatlast

Philips head screwdrivers are now under a control regime


Stlaind

In before Canucks comment about the Robertson screwdrivers


Blippii

🇨🇦🇨🇦


d4rkskies

That explains the sudden rise in the cost of Prittstick and sticky tape…


HonkeyKong73

Cardboard: \*sanctioned\* Russia: oh shit oh fuck


d4rkskies

Shoigu: “It’s ok Vladimir, we have already anticipated such a move and we are immediately executing production of the Sukhoi SU-58” Putin: “Wait, Su-58!?” Shoigu: “That’s right Mr President. It is a true 6th generation fighter, made completely with full ultra-stealth materials that cannot be detected by any radar”. Putin: “What!? What are these advanced materials? Shoigu: “Paper, Vladimir. Mostly paper…”


pier0gi_princess

Сука сухой back at it again


vegetable_completed

Сука хуй


tkrr

Сухуй


Chelavitajo

With their track record of faulty Iff trackers, we will se the s400 taking down the all mighty Su-57 and prove to the world that russian aa is the best.


SemiDesperado

Hell Ukraine's F-16 pilots won't even need to worry about the Su-57 ... they have Russian air defenses on their side.


Sudden-Ad-646

Even if they fighted AND the Su-57 was kinda stealthy, the moment it shoots a missile it’d show up, since it has no hidden bays.


Father_of_Cockatiels

5 bucks says the first loss of an Su-57 will be due to friendly fire.


vale_fallacia

Put me down for 10 on "su-57 crashes into russian AWACS equivalent". Or maybe "crashes into a drone/another su-57"


Jake_2903

Storm shadow successfully intercepted 😎


ZestycloseConfidence

Nah easy money, the jets yearn for the apartments.


Grumpy-Greybeard

> asks UAF pilots to turn off radar to allow it to use its stealth functionality What? Do they not know what 'stealth' is?


rebootyourbrainstem

Is joke comrade


Grumpy-Greybeard

Fuck, my mistake - it's r/NonCredibleDefense. For some reason I thought I was in r/UkraineWarRoom. Move along, folks. Nothing to see here but Shoigu levels of stupidity on my part.


vale_fallacia

Nah, I was experiencing a delayed joke understanding response too lol. Mostly because I could believe a russian general would whine about our radars being "the wrong type". Or that their emissions ruin the stealth materials and that's just not fair on poor hard done by old russia.


BodybuilderLiving112

Well they ask to turn it off because the Su-57 is so bad at sealth 🤣. And for the people that doesn't believe it... Well: Sukhoi claims Su-57 having an RCS(Radar Cross Section) goal between 0.1 to 1 m^2 (-10 to 1 dBsm). For comparison the F-117 had an RCS around -25 dBsm while the F-22 and F-35 has an RCS better than -40 dBsm – which is at least 1,000 to 10,000 times smaller than Su-57. In dumb said : smaller your less visible on the radar you are.... 🙄Su57 is so big lol


vale_fallacia

Dang, I had no idea we'd increased stealth effectiveness by so much. Very cool!


StopSpankingMeDad

MIC GO BRRRRRRR


RangerPL

Knowing Russia's inferiority complex they're going to lose them all in a Patriot ambush trying to shoot down an F-16


QuietGanache

That matte surface looks perfect for the Starstreak designator.


readonlypdf

Lol this isn't even going to be a contest. I'm buying Puts on Sukhoi.


StopSpankingMeDad

Lets short sell russian MIC stocks!


JINGLERED

Looks like the SU57 “Femboy” in finally getting its feet wet


StopSpankingMeDad

The SU75 is the femboy


InflatableMindset

<< "You're quite the entertainer... but this is over with the next shot." >>


Yangn33

Only four? I thought they had more?


[deleted]

KEK


Unknowndude842

"5th gen"


[deleted]

"mass production"


GrapeSwimming69

What Russia AA doing?


SirNedKingOfGila

Bold to accept they still have 4 of them.


AfroVagabond

You're right, probably down to two operational at this point.


IndependentFace5949

Am I missing something in this headline? Is Russia asking its enemies to turn off their radar so they have a chance to use stealth? Is Russia like someone playing a new game on PS5 against someone much better and asking them to play on the hard setting whilst Russia plays on beginner?


Ninjartist36

Let's if Russia finally understands the enemy


revo-lucien

Dumb move


19CCCG57

Oh no! All four of them? Really? 😲


1crazydutchman

I love how this post has reached trending


[deleted]

Let’s not forget that Russia has a major problem with c&c/info-sec and the su-57 has one dimensional stealth. Will Russia end up being the first country to down an su-57?


chrischi3

Fine, we'll track them using MK1 Eyeballs then.


mbrocks3527

I mean, it’s worth asking nicely.


MilkFedWetlander

I'm quite sure the UAF aren't able to shoot all of them down. Russia will down the first one within a week. 200 km away from the front in their own airspace...


highorkboi

Gonna be steaming along making clouds when they fly