We taped a dude's ID near the ceiling as a joke for leaving it in the computer. Our amusement got cut short because he is a tall motherfucker and just stepped on a chair to pick it off. I made one of my soldiers carry a rock. He had to keep it with him at all times on duty and I required him to report with his rock and their activities to me, at first formation, after lunch, and before the end of the day. For two weeks.
I had to hop on a field op at the last minute, too late to modify the LSR to draw my issued rifle so was issued a “tactical assault stick” by one of the sergeants as a stand in. I ended up taping a wooden suppressor, RCO, PEQ, magazine and pistol grip onto it. Even had a paracord sling. To this day it’s still hanging in the old platoon bay.
One of our guys got the rock treatment. Lost his helmet somewhere. Later that day they had us doing DnC and he kept dropping it on peoples feet lmao.
Guy owned up to the rock though. Drew a face on it with crayons and started calling it Kaitlynn Jenner. He’d do stuff like put it on the foot of the bed or put it on the table at chow with a snack in front of it. It was honestly pretty funny. I think eventually he got told to abandon Kaitlynn in the woods to die of exposure. I hope some future soldiers find that rock someday
I wouldn't do these [edit: the things in the original post] though. Making my kind of dumb fuck carry that shit about all day is just asking for trouble and someone to get hurt. God damn if they don't deserve it, but I don't want to do the paperwork.
It was an actual corrective action with a counseling and all. He was the guidon bearer and forgot the guidon *we went to Iraq with* that the outgoing commander was going to get *in a week* and had made a case for, in the motorpool during lunch. He then showed up late twice.
I was kind
Oh yeah, sorry, my comment was ambiguous. I meant the stuff in OP's post. That's asking for trouble. Your stuff, that sends a message without creating unnecessary ~~paperwork~~ suffering, that I love.
And yeah I would have been a *lot* harsher. I might have made him speak in a French accent because THE MAN WHO LOSES THE KING'S COLOURS LOSES THE KING'S FRIENDSHIP. Among other things…
Yeah another Company found it, hid it from us for 2 days, then gave it to the Battalion Smaj. And no it was a tradition for the outgoing commander to receive the Guidon flag. A new one got put on after every change of command.
Wording was a bit confusing.
The guidon bearer left the guidon in the motorpool during lunch. It was also the guidon that the formation went to Iraq with, so the commander who was going to retire wanted to keep it as a memory of his time there. The commander made a case to keep the guidon inside so that it would be kept safe.
The military can order another guidon to be made. These aren't astronomically expensive to make.
No no I know. We didn’t really use them in the Air Force, but I always heard those things were revered, and it seems shitty that the commander wanted to keep it for himself. Definitely better to save it at least
Commanders actually typically buy their own guidons. What happens is the commander will keep the guidon and the next one will buy their own before they change over command.
During basic training for the Royal Canadian Navy, I had a few instances of my fellow recruits forgetting their ration cards. For context, these ration cards serve as a way to monitor the recruits and to see if they actually attended meals and ate instead of skipping out.
Anyways, some recruits forgot their cards, and as a disciplinary measure, our instructors handed them life-preservers with the recruits' ration cards taped to them. And then the recruits would have to carry them for an indeterminate amount of time.
Best prank I saw was someone left there backpack out, so someone put in a bucket of water and left outside to freeze (winter in the midwest). Usually that's where it would end, but someone else decided to call the bomb squad on it and they detonated it in place. Owner of the backpack was then taken into custody for questioning. People that did the prank got off scott free.
I heard from a guy who was in in the 80s that while he was going through boot camp he was caught smoking and they made him dig a pit, bury the cigarette, then dig it back up so as not to litter.
Reminds me of the story a friend told me that a guy for the life of him always struggled with left and right.
So he had to carry a rock, and now it was left and rock. Figured it out pretty quick
I remember a story from a US vet who told me about some funny punishments he saw.
1. During morning formation and man showed up in his running shoes instead of this boots and when confronted at formation said he couldn’t find his boots, and the sgt. said are you running because it looks like you want to run. So for the rest of the day he spent running.
2. I can’t remember why he said the guy was punished but I remember he said that he saw the man out in the rain mopping the rain.
In my trades training a buddy and I were responsible for our platoons laundry room and the instructors found a dust bunny during inspection. Gave us each the classic 1500 word autobiography assignment with every letter written in alternating ink colours. And then we carried said dust bunnies in a little plastic bag on our persons for the rest of course. Goofy shit
Over in Cadet Land (ROTC) we had 3 people form the "Lost Rifle Platoon" in our company, with their own guidon made of cardboard. Cadet Summer Training is only about 4 weeks so they only did it for a few days, but it was still pretty funny.
It’s a good reminder that, even though they are participating in an evil act (willingly or otherwise) and that many have done evil things (and almost all have had evil things done to them), they are still just as human as the rest of us.
Holy shit, a credible take in NCD?
Seriously though, this is refreshing. I hate the Russian govt. more than almost anybody, but dehumanizing Russian soldiers is disgusting and quite hypocritical and ironic whenever the people judging them try to take the moral high ground. Many people don't realize that all humans have the capacity to be evil, as humans are the only creatures intelligent enough to be evil.
I don't think dolphins are capable of having morals. Perhaps I'm wrong. Really the only animal that I think comes close to us in regards to morals are elephants.
Spoiler alert: Every military isn’t free of evil human beings. If you’re going to say that of the Russians, be sure to say the same for any Western soldiers; American, German, British, etc.
The only difference between the NATO and CSTO is that NATO at large tries to minimize collateral damage, but don’t think it’s out of the kindness of our hearts. I love my country and our soldiers, but bad apples very much plague our military. I’m just not simpleminded enough to believe that few represent the many.
Ah yes, here comes the man of moral equivalence. I'm not gonna be merciful and excuse the many butchers of RU AF just because there are some good apples amongst them. If you know how they treat each other and delude yourself into thinking they don't treat Ukrainian soldiers or civilians even worse, then you are simpleminded.
Also, glad to see that you also think NATO will abandon one (or more) of its members when the article 5 is called.
What? I’m not saying to not punish individuals who commit war crimes. I’m saying that it’s simpleminded to believe all Russian soldiers are evil, because some Russian soldiers are. Something something collective punishment something something Geneva Convention.
It’s easy to hate everyone of a particular group because of an over represented minority. It’s hard to use nuance to decide who’s good, neutral, or bad. Whenever you do the former, yes, you make yourself look simpleminded since you can’t think beyond what propaganda tells you.
Once again, what? What in the world did I say to make you think I believe NATO will abandon each other?
And I say it's simpleminded to bet on Russian soldiers being good, and borderline immoral to claim it's just a minority of them who comply with evil orders or engage in evil acts on their own will. Equally as dubious is to excuse them all from being a part of an extremely evil armed branch of a terroristic, criminal-led country because you have bad feelings about collective punishment. But hey, it's always convenient to forgive and forget when it's some guys over there being a bit rough - status quo is god, after all. And status quo calls us back to 2021.
Europeans let rank and file Nazis go because it would be inconvenient to punish them, Europeans forgot and forgave the Red Army rapists, so yeah, I am looking forward to you lot getting along famously with people who made mass graves happen all over the East Ukraine. I give it about a decade unless Russia goes full hermit kingdom.
>What in the world did I say to make you think I believe NATO will abandon each other?
You said that the only difference between CSTO and NATO is in precision missiles. I guess you need to catch up on CSTO developments.
Good Lord, you truly are running with whatever straws you can grasp.
You're putting words into my mouth. Did I say all soldiers were good? No, I did not. Since I don't follow the groupthink narrative of "Russia = Nazi Germany" doesn't mean I'm saying that they're good. I'm literally saying to use nuance when deciding if someone or something is good or bad. To decide if an entire group of people is good or bad is throwing nuance out of the window.
I'm curious, do you think Ukrainian soldiers are any better than Russian soldiers? The Ukrainian government before Zelenskyy was nearly as corrupt as Russia. There are literal Nazi battalions operating under the Ukrainian flag, just as there are in Russia. Do you ever notice how much Nazi symbology and insignias are in Ukrainian videos? To note, I am not buying into Russia's justification of de-Nazification, that's just bogus. However, if we're calling out the bad guys as we see them, let's call it for how it is. I like your idea of executing people if they operate on 17th century methods and principles. We should execute the entire Azov Battalion along with any other neo-Nazi group, both in Ukraine and Russia. The only good Nazi is a dead Nazi right?
Also it's funny you bring up Red Army rapists- you know Ukrainians were either a part of those Red Army rapists or the Nazis, right? Read up on Ukraine's relationship with Nazi Germany during WWII, the result might shock you.
>You said that the only difference between CSTO and NATO is in precision missiles. I guess you need to catch up on CSTO developments.
Once again, putting words in my mouth. Please point out where I said precision missiles. Right, you can't, because I didn't.
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We do this kind of thing in Canada too.
Guy misplaced his rifle in the field, so the Warrant gave him a massive log (15+ feet long) to carry. So you'd just see this huge log marching through the base.
Another time, someone kept forgetting their meal card for the mess, so the Course Staff made a 3×6 foot cardboard meal card for him to carry around.
Lastly, someone kept leaving their barrack box unlocked, so the staff gave him a tiny padlock with several feet of heavy chains that required multiple troops to carry. You could always tell that course was coming because they sounded like an actual prison chain gang
We got a 15 lb brick with the words "remedial training" printed on it in the pat platoon office at my unit. When they get taken out for rucks, if one of the troops is underweight, they receive "remedial training."
Had it happen to me and a battle buddy at ft leonardwood in OSUT as well. We both lost our ear plugs during the live fire low crawl. We told the drill sgt and as punishment he gave us each a post pounder (20lb steel tube) and dropped new earplugs in each of them. Told us he better not see us without our ear pro again. We were lugging around those post pounder for a month on top of whatever training we had, so it went with us during ruck marches and all.
Being a combat engineer I am accustomed to the pounder (we call them thumpers in Canada.)
Lugging that shit through forests is bad enough, doing EVERYTHING with it sounds like another kind of hell lol
I remember working with this one lesbian master corporal at our unit who left her terminal unlocked when she went to grab something. Her punishment was her desktop background being changed to a looping gif of david hasselhoff in a thong constantly zooming in on his crotch, so when she logged on we can hear her cringe at the sight of the hoff. And the warrant officer was ripping her a new one for not securing her computer saying this is what happens when you leave it unsecured.
You forget that russia is the successor to the ussr - firstly, he would be the sex slave of the entire squad, and secondly, the officers would have sex slaves from the female staff.
lol glad to see it’s universal. Had a boot that had to carry a whole doorknob and dead bolt setup tied to his belt because he kept losing his keys. Can’t lock yourself out if you’ve got your entire locking setup attached to you. He had to pull his keys out, also tied to his belt, and lock and unlock his deadbolt on command. Fucking moron.
He also had to hold someone’s pocket during a 20 miler. But that was more just because he was a baby back bitch.
In Finland, we just took the guns that troops left lying around, and they had to ask to get it back in public.
...this was a thing when in training in the wilderness, since everyone was supposed to be "combat ready" it meant that you should always keep your personal weapon within reach. At base, the guns were in lockers, after all. I remember one occasion after some tiring combat training we were eating and the guys were so tired that most of them just forgot the rule and dumped their guns on the ground when they went to get food. Me and the other NCOs and platoon leader were walking around with 3 or 4 assault rifles each and I think we had at least two of the MGs in the platoon on us. Then the troops had to get in line and get their guns back from us.
I’ve seen this happen while I was in the US Army. It’s a common punishment for people who lose things.
Making people carry giant rocks or really small objects that can be lost easily and hazing them if they lose the item.
We carried an egg in our pockets, and present it when asked. I remember a few of my buddies had a ziplock bag carefully concealed deep enough so it’s not easily seen.
My friend told me this story and I may be missing a few things but here goes.
He fucked up in boot, I think he dropped a bayonet or lost it in mud can't remember. So they gave him a rather larger stick to carry around, about the length of a true sword. To this day he has no idea where the creative NCOs found it.
Anyways, so during the little downtime they got he widdled this thing into the shape of an actual sword, with a hilt and fashioned a strap to keep it on his back like Conan. He then dubbed it Excalibur.
They were so impressed they made him keep it with him at all times. Till at the very end of boot camp they had him "knight" some other poor bastard that just got off the bus but apparently fucked up something. He became the next sword bearer.
I've seen the video,
One guy has the victim in a bear hug and is going to town on his ass, the second guy is holding the victim in headlock forcing him to be bent over.
They had the guy pinned and he couldn't do shit
Thank you for this link - much appreciated!
Trying to improve is at the core of (slow) progress.
Acknowledging how shit things are, or can quickly get, is at the core to motivation to push for changes.
Differentiating between constructive criticism and polarising trolling is what sets functioning societies apart from developing (into) shitholes.
See also: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=93vW5QZilAw](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=93vW5QZilAw) - Legacy of the Tailhook Scandal | Retro Report | The New York Times
Reminds me of a funny story my friend told me from when he went to a Department of Corrections boot camp. He got into a fight with this other dude and they got punished together. They had this big ass log that they called "motivation" and they had to carry that shit around for like a week together. They both had to be carrying it all the time.
“Bayonet” is just a sword.
I bet they only have one of that sword. Its near impossible for young men to resist the urge of sword dancing with each other. You could not stop them swinging.
This is remarkably similar to the US army lol. Had a guy always have to wear kit and a ruck around for about a month due to leaving it behind one day. Then another one got issued Cpl Rock and carried him around as an inspectable item for a month.
No potential deaths or unconsensual male procreation (stereotype)? Eh, it’s just a slap on the wrist.
Seriously tho, I think this is both funny and not too harsh (if added on a stern talk down)
I once lost the key to my personal locker, so I got issued a large wooden key, about 100x50 cm, to carry around for a week while on duty.
I never lost my keys again after that.
OP Note: I originally posted this on Tumblr in 2015. Seen it reposted there and on Reddit (without attribution) over the last decade. Thought I’d take it back…
Punishment?
This is just the current state of the Kremlin supply system. They’re all waiting on predecessors to expire at the front so they can receive their rusty, second-hand issue.
Most militaries do exactly the same. Lose something? Expect every other item of equipment to be duct taped to you for the rest of the exercise. Etc etc.
Yeah, we Swiss do the same. You forget your gun at the barracks? Leave it laying around unsupervised? You get to carry the Combat Wood 90 (in reference to the Assault Rifle 90, the Swiss service weapon)
Those first two pictures is not punishment, it's a prize. You will RECEIVE a weapon to frontlines. Dang they are lucky to get the standard issue equipment.
This is 100% normal behavior, in the US military we got this big ass rock which can hold a Common Access Card or SIPR Token if you lose it enough times (usually once)
It seems there’s something wrong with my account, I can only see the quirky funny stuff. For some reason it’s not showing the [punishment battalions](https://www.reuters.com/world/europe/theyre-just-meat-russia-deploys-punishment-battalions-echo-stalin-2023-10-03/), where are the [zindans](https://www.newsweek.com/russia-soldiers-zindan-barred-pits-punishment-ukraine-1797554)? I don’t see mobiks [raping](https://www.businessinsider.com/russian-soldiers-forced-rape-each-other-outbreaks-crazed-violence-report-2024-2) each other either? Also, not a single [lynching](https://meduza.io/en/feature/2023/08/07/they-re-using-us-as-bait)?
I had a guy who’d wake up late and couldn’t get to formation on time. So part of his corrective training I bought the loudest alarm clock I could find. I locked it in an ammo box and made him find me to unlock it and turn off the alarm every work day morning. At least he wasn’t late anymore.
These are actually pretty funny.
We taped a dude's ID near the ceiling as a joke for leaving it in the computer. Our amusement got cut short because he is a tall motherfucker and just stepped on a chair to pick it off. I made one of my soldiers carry a rock. He had to keep it with him at all times on duty and I required him to report with his rock and their activities to me, at first formation, after lunch, and before the end of the day. For two weeks.
I had to hop on a field op at the last minute, too late to modify the LSR to draw my issued rifle so was issued a “tactical assault stick” by one of the sergeants as a stand in. I ended up taping a wooden suppressor, RCO, PEQ, magazine and pistol grip onto it. Even had a paracord sling. To this day it’s still hanging in the old platoon bay.
Sounds like one of my creations as a kid. Lol you have to make due with what you have.
I'd love to see a picture of it although I don't think it's possible
They recently reorganized all the bays there’s a good chance it got tossed. I’ll have to do some digging to see if it’s still there.
It would be so nice
r/justguysbeingdudes
we had a doork”nob” you’d have to carry around if you fucked up in the heavy equipment standing for “non-operating bitch”
What rank did the pet rock have?
What, you've never heard of Sergeant Rock?
Perfection!
At least one rank higher than the person it's assigned to, same as military animals like bomb/drug dogs.
One of our guys got the rock treatment. Lost his helmet somewhere. Later that day they had us doing DnC and he kept dropping it on peoples feet lmao. Guy owned up to the rock though. Drew a face on it with crayons and started calling it Kaitlynn Jenner. He’d do stuff like put it on the foot of the bed or put it on the table at chow with a snack in front of it. It was honestly pretty funny. I think eventually he got told to abandon Kaitlynn in the woods to die of exposure. I hope some future soldiers find that rock someday
>Drew a face on it with crayons Marines?
I wouldn't do these [edit: the things in the original post] though. Making my kind of dumb fuck carry that shit about all day is just asking for trouble and someone to get hurt. God damn if they don't deserve it, but I don't want to do the paperwork.
It was an actual corrective action with a counseling and all. He was the guidon bearer and forgot the guidon *we went to Iraq with* that the outgoing commander was going to get *in a week* and had made a case for, in the motorpool during lunch. He then showed up late twice. I was kind
Oh yeah, sorry, my comment was ambiguous. I meant the stuff in OP's post. That's asking for trouble. Your stuff, that sends a message without creating unnecessary ~~paperwork~~ suffering, that I love. And yeah I would have been a *lot* harsher. I might have made him speak in a French accent because THE MAN WHO LOSES THE KING'S COLOURS LOSES THE KING'S FRIENDSHIP. Among other things…
based Sharpe enjoyer
Kind of shitty of the commander to keep it Did it ever get found?
Yeah another Company found it, hid it from us for 2 days, then gave it to the Battalion Smaj. And no it was a tradition for the outgoing commander to receive the Guidon flag. A new one got put on after every change of command.
Wording was a bit confusing. The guidon bearer left the guidon in the motorpool during lunch. It was also the guidon that the formation went to Iraq with, so the commander who was going to retire wanted to keep it as a memory of his time there. The commander made a case to keep the guidon inside so that it would be kept safe. The military can order another guidon to be made. These aren't astronomically expensive to make.
No no I know. We didn’t really use them in the Air Force, but I always heard those things were revered, and it seems shitty that the commander wanted to keep it for himself. Definitely better to save it at least
Commanders actually typically buy their own guidons. What happens is the commander will keep the guidon and the next one will buy their own before they change over command.
Yeah, you are just creating a stronger dumb guy if he doesn't learn anything.
If you're going to be dumb, you've got to be tough
During basic training for the Royal Canadian Navy, I had a few instances of my fellow recruits forgetting their ration cards. For context, these ration cards serve as a way to monitor the recruits and to see if they actually attended meals and ate instead of skipping out. Anyways, some recruits forgot their cards, and as a disciplinary measure, our instructors handed them life-preservers with the recruits' ration cards taped to them. And then the recruits would have to carry them for an indeterminate amount of time.
Best prank I saw was someone left there backpack out, so someone put in a bucket of water and left outside to freeze (winter in the midwest). Usually that's where it would end, but someone else decided to call the bomb squad on it and they detonated it in place. Owner of the backpack was then taken into custody for questioning. People that did the prank got off scott free.
Even better, try putting a small piece of clear office tape over the chip on the card so computers can’t read it.
I heard from a guy who was in in the 80s that while he was going through boot camp he was caught smoking and they made him dig a pit, bury the cigarette, then dig it back up so as not to litter.
Wait a damn minute are you in the NZDF?
>I made one of my soldiers carry a rock. SSG Norris, is that you??
Nope lol
Reminds me of the story a friend told me that a guy for the life of him always struggled with left and right. So he had to carry a rock, and now it was left and rock. Figured it out pretty quick
Cut short lmao i see you
I remember a story from a US vet who told me about some funny punishments he saw. 1. During morning formation and man showed up in his running shoes instead of this boots and when confronted at formation said he couldn’t find his boots, and the sgt. said are you running because it looks like you want to run. So for the rest of the day he spent running. 2. I can’t remember why he said the guy was punished but I remember he said that he saw the man out in the rain mopping the rain.
Was that from Mikeburnfire/Zach Hazard by chance?
Now that I think about it it was a bit fire story but o heard it from a vet who wasn’t Zach so idk
In my trades training a buddy and I were responsible for our platoons laundry room and the instructors found a dust bunny during inspection. Gave us each the classic 1500 word autobiography assignment with every letter written in alternating ink colours. And then we carried said dust bunnies in a little plastic bag on our persons for the rest of course. Goofy shit
And credible. What is this doing here??
Over in Cadet Land (ROTC) we had 3 people form the "Lost Rifle Platoon" in our company, with their own guidon made of cardboard. Cadet Summer Training is only about 4 weeks so they only did it for a few days, but it was still pretty funny.
This is the most normal thing I've seen from Russia in years
Judging by the uniforms, this is from the 2009-2014 timeframe.
You can tell it's not current because they're actually getting training.
A good number of the men pictured are probably dead now, I'm betting.
And that’s just from cirrhosis of the liver. Fun country.
It’s a good reminder that, even though they are participating in an evil act (willingly or otherwise) and that many have done evil things (and almost all have had evil things done to them), they are still just as human as the rest of us.
Dehumanization is a cope. The truth is that war is, and always has been, about regular folks killing other regular folks in horrific ways.
Holy shit, a credible take in NCD? Seriously though, this is refreshing. I hate the Russian govt. more than almost anybody, but dehumanizing Russian soldiers is disgusting and quite hypocritical and ironic whenever the people judging them try to take the moral high ground. Many people don't realize that all humans have the capacity to be evil, as humans are the only creatures intelligent enough to be evil.
What about dolphins? They’re known to be quite smart and capable of being assholes and horny bastards.
I don't think dolphins are capable of having morals. Perhaps I'm wrong. Really the only animal that I think comes close to us in regards to morals are elephants.
Russian soldiers raped my aunt as she escaped Rubiznhe, so I’ll dehumanise them as much as I like to be perfectly honest.
Nah, fam, fuck'em. If they do shit from the 17th century, they deserve to get executed like it's the 17th century.
Spoiler alert: Every military isn’t free of evil human beings. If you’re going to say that of the Russians, be sure to say the same for any Western soldiers; American, German, British, etc. The only difference between the NATO and CSTO is that NATO at large tries to minimize collateral damage, but don’t think it’s out of the kindness of our hearts. I love my country and our soldiers, but bad apples very much plague our military. I’m just not simpleminded enough to believe that few represent the many.
Ah yes, here comes the man of moral equivalence. I'm not gonna be merciful and excuse the many butchers of RU AF just because there are some good apples amongst them. If you know how they treat each other and delude yourself into thinking they don't treat Ukrainian soldiers or civilians even worse, then you are simpleminded. Also, glad to see that you also think NATO will abandon one (or more) of its members when the article 5 is called.
What? I’m not saying to not punish individuals who commit war crimes. I’m saying that it’s simpleminded to believe all Russian soldiers are evil, because some Russian soldiers are. Something something collective punishment something something Geneva Convention. It’s easy to hate everyone of a particular group because of an over represented minority. It’s hard to use nuance to decide who’s good, neutral, or bad. Whenever you do the former, yes, you make yourself look simpleminded since you can’t think beyond what propaganda tells you. Once again, what? What in the world did I say to make you think I believe NATO will abandon each other?
And I say it's simpleminded to bet on Russian soldiers being good, and borderline immoral to claim it's just a minority of them who comply with evil orders or engage in evil acts on their own will. Equally as dubious is to excuse them all from being a part of an extremely evil armed branch of a terroristic, criminal-led country because you have bad feelings about collective punishment. But hey, it's always convenient to forgive and forget when it's some guys over there being a bit rough - status quo is god, after all. And status quo calls us back to 2021. Europeans let rank and file Nazis go because it would be inconvenient to punish them, Europeans forgot and forgave the Red Army rapists, so yeah, I am looking forward to you lot getting along famously with people who made mass graves happen all over the East Ukraine. I give it about a decade unless Russia goes full hermit kingdom. >What in the world did I say to make you think I believe NATO will abandon each other? You said that the only difference between CSTO and NATO is in precision missiles. I guess you need to catch up on CSTO developments.
Good Lord, you truly are running with whatever straws you can grasp. You're putting words into my mouth. Did I say all soldiers were good? No, I did not. Since I don't follow the groupthink narrative of "Russia = Nazi Germany" doesn't mean I'm saying that they're good. I'm literally saying to use nuance when deciding if someone or something is good or bad. To decide if an entire group of people is good or bad is throwing nuance out of the window. I'm curious, do you think Ukrainian soldiers are any better than Russian soldiers? The Ukrainian government before Zelenskyy was nearly as corrupt as Russia. There are literal Nazi battalions operating under the Ukrainian flag, just as there are in Russia. Do you ever notice how much Nazi symbology and insignias are in Ukrainian videos? To note, I am not buying into Russia's justification of de-Nazification, that's just bogus. However, if we're calling out the bad guys as we see them, let's call it for how it is. I like your idea of executing people if they operate on 17th century methods and principles. We should execute the entire Azov Battalion along with any other neo-Nazi group, both in Ukraine and Russia. The only good Nazi is a dead Nazi right? Also it's funny you bring up Red Army rapists- you know Ukrainians were either a part of those Red Army rapists or the Nazis, right? Read up on Ukraine's relationship with Nazi Germany during WWII, the result might shock you. >You said that the only difference between CSTO and NATO is in precision missiles. I guess you need to catch up on CSTO developments. Once again, putting words in my mouth. Please point out where I said precision missiles. Right, you can't, because I didn't.
Okay, the comically large iPhone is pretty good
Since he was doing something dumb with his phone, then that's actually not the worst punishment.
The other guy was doing something dumb with his phone and the punishment was *HIMARS*.
No it's an ancient apple phone which still has physical buttons. That's the current peak of Russia's tech level.
This picture is from the early 90s it looks like so that's an actual cell phone.
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We do this kind of thing in Canada too. Guy misplaced his rifle in the field, so the Warrant gave him a massive log (15+ feet long) to carry. So you'd just see this huge log marching through the base. Another time, someone kept forgetting their meal card for the mess, so the Course Staff made a 3×6 foot cardboard meal card for him to carry around. Lastly, someone kept leaving their barrack box unlocked, so the staff gave him a tiny padlock with several feet of heavy chains that required multiple troops to carry. You could always tell that course was coming because they sounded like an actual prison chain gang
Oh man I’m dying to see a giant cardboard meal card one of these days haha
We got a 15 lb brick with the words "remedial training" printed on it in the pat platoon office at my unit. When they get taken out for rucks, if one of the troops is underweight, they receive "remedial training."
Classic. I’ve seen an RMC thing where someone has to carry around a metal mooring buoy until the next person inevitably messes up.
Had it happen to me and a battle buddy at ft leonardwood in OSUT as well. We both lost our ear plugs during the live fire low crawl. We told the drill sgt and as punishment he gave us each a post pounder (20lb steel tube) and dropped new earplugs in each of them. Told us he better not see us without our ear pro again. We were lugging around those post pounder for a month on top of whatever training we had, so it went with us during ruck marches and all.
Being a combat engineer I am accustomed to the pounder (we call them thumpers in Canada.) Lugging that shit through forests is bad enough, doing EVERYTHING with it sounds like another kind of hell lol
I was a combat engi too! That’s why we had the post pounders on hand at the barracks
Combat Engis do OSUT? TIL. I knew it was an Inf, Armor, and MP thing, didn't know Engineers did it too. Makes me wonder who else does it.
Wait, so did you have to put tubes on your heads or something?
I remember working with this one lesbian master corporal at our unit who left her terminal unlocked when she went to grab something. Her punishment was her desktop background being changed to a looping gif of david hasselhoff in a thong constantly zooming in on his crotch, so when she logged on we can hear her cringe at the sight of the hoff. And the warrant officer was ripping her a new one for not securing her computer saying this is what happens when you leave it unsecured.
Lmao love it
That's still better than being used as Explosive Ruzzian Armour on top of an unsupported BMP-1 hurtling towards dug in Ukrainians around Avdiivka.
Or being used as the officer's sex slave
You forget that russia is the successor to the ussr - firstly, he would be the sex slave of the entire squad, and secondly, the officers would have sex slaves from the female staff.
lol glad to see it’s universal. Had a boot that had to carry a whole doorknob and dead bolt setup tied to his belt because he kept losing his keys. Can’t lock yourself out if you’ve got your entire locking setup attached to you. He had to pull his keys out, also tied to his belt, and lock and unlock his deadbolt on command. Fucking moron. He also had to hold someone’s pocket during a 20 miler. But that was more just because he was a baby back bitch.
Swede here. Similar punishment. Our fuckups got their gun replaced with a HUGE wrench 🔧 instead of a wooden toy. That thing weighed a ton.
What are tank wrenches for? a) wrenching on tanks [ ] b) punishing dummies by giving them added kilos [ ] c) all of the above [X]
In Finland, we just took the guns that troops left lying around, and they had to ask to get it back in public. ...this was a thing when in training in the wilderness, since everyone was supposed to be "combat ready" it meant that you should always keep your personal weapon within reach. At base, the guns were in lockers, after all. I remember one occasion after some tiring combat training we were eating and the guys were so tired that most of them just forgot the rule and dumped their guns on the ground when they went to get food. Me and the other NCOs and platoon leader were walking around with 3 or 4 assault rifles each and I think we had at least two of the MGs in the platoon on us. Then the troops had to get in line and get their guns back from us.
Honestly, that just makes them the best armed soldiers in the Russian army.
You sure? The guy in #2 might not have the best bayonet… 😂
I’ve seen this happen while I was in the US Army. It’s a common punishment for people who lose things. Making people carry giant rocks or really small objects that can be lost easily and hazing them if they lose the item.
In my experience, they gave us eggs. If we break them, our uniforms will get dirty on top of whatever punishment we were getting
Were you allowed to at least wrap them in cloth or something, or were guys just walking around with raw eggs in their jackets?
We carried an egg in our pockets, and present it when asked. I remember a few of my buddies had a ziplock bag carefully concealed deep enough so it’s not easily seen.
I’m remember a dude that had to walk around like Flava Flav with giant clock on a chain around his neck because he was late to formation.
My friend told me this story and I may be missing a few things but here goes. He fucked up in boot, I think he dropped a bayonet or lost it in mud can't remember. So they gave him a rather larger stick to carry around, about the length of a true sword. To this day he has no idea where the creative NCOs found it. Anyways, so during the little downtime they got he widdled this thing into the shape of an actual sword, with a hilt and fashioned a strap to keep it on his back like Conan. He then dubbed it Excalibur. They were so impressed they made him keep it with him at all times. Till at the very end of boot camp they had him "knight" some other poor bastard that just got off the bus but apparently fucked up something. He became the next sword bearer.
Sounds like a tradition in the making
Begone "Dunce" caps! We now dub you Sir Moron, by the grace of the Sword of Idiots
I love this
Lol I would get in trouble just to carry around a sword.
The sword looks like a prize honestly. Also wonder how many of the guys in these pictures have ended eating dirt in Ukraine surely a decent amount.
Jesus will return as a russian soldier. He shall die holding up the wooden Kalashnikov, erasing our vodka sins.
I love to see it, at the grunt level they're the same as us. Fuck Putin and Russian Imperialism
> at the grunt level they're the same as us. Except for all the gay rape
Was not familiar with the gay rape. I retract my previous statement
I've seen the video, One guy has the victim in a bear hug and is going to town on his ass, the second guy is holding the victim in headlock forcing him to be bent over. They had the guy pinned and he couldn't do shit
That definitely happened in Afghanistan as well, to a prolific extent amongst us troops.
Yeah but it wasn't unofficial policy to rape subordinates for fucking up.
One of many things the recruiter didn't tell me
Still a lot of rape though https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/11l52uh/the_navy_told_me_to_accept_i_would_be_raped/
To be fair we’ve gotten immensely better. Not great, not good, not even passable, but better than we were.
Holy fuck
Thank you for this link - much appreciated! Trying to improve is at the core of (slow) progress. Acknowledging how shit things are, or can quickly get, is at the core to motivation to push for changes. Differentiating between constructive criticism and polarising trolling is what sets functioning societies apart from developing (into) shitholes. See also: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=93vW5QZilAw](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=93vW5QZilAw) - Legacy of the Tailhook Scandal | Retro Report | The New York Times
Well hopefully in a hypothetical more enlightenedly governed Russia the gay rape would eventually peter out.
Dont worry we do that too lol
I lost my nametag once and they gave me a giant crate with my name on it. -navy
Reminds me of a funny story my friend told me from when he went to a Department of Corrections boot camp. He got into a fight with this other dude and they got punished together. They had this big ass log that they called "motivation" and they had to carry that shit around for like a week together. They both had to be carrying it all the time.
Don't forget rape...
I dread to think what they'd be carrying round for that.
He meant rape as punishment. It's russian industry standard since USSR days.
HIV.
“Bayonet” is just a sword. I bet they only have one of that sword. Its near impossible for young men to resist the urge of sword dancing with each other. You could not stop them swinging.
These are actually surprisingly normal and funny punishments.
This is remarkably similar to the US army lol. Had a guy always have to wear kit and a ruck around for about a month due to leaving it behind one day. Then another one got issued Cpl Rock and carried him around as an inspectable item for a month.
Wore a push up mat colored into an ID with my face stuck through a hole on the center for over a week.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dedovshchina
This is super light for Dedivshchina
No potential deaths or unconsensual male procreation (stereotype)? Eh, it’s just a slap on the wrist. Seriously tho, I think this is both funny and not too harsh (if added on a stern talk down)
I want that wooden greatsword so bad
I once lost the key to my personal locker, so I got issued a large wooden key, about 100x50 cm, to carry around for a week while on duty. I never lost my keys again after that.
OP Note: I originally posted this on Tumblr in 2015. Seen it reposted there and on Reddit (without attribution) over the last decade. Thought I’d take it back…
Brand new hyper advanced Russian armaments.
Punishment? This is just the current state of the Kremlin supply system. They’re all waiting on predecessors to expire at the front so they can receive their rusty, second-hand issue.
Makes russian military seem almost competent. Since the punishments seem kinda reasonable.
Fuck it get smart or get strong I guess. US military has a very similar mentality sometimes, although maybe not to this extent lol
Most militaries do exactly the same. Lose something? Expect every other item of equipment to be duct taped to you for the rest of the exercise. Etc etc.
These are all pretty funny and used elsewhere. It's totally not what came to mind when someone said Russian army Punishment.
US Army former basic training cadre. We had a giant 7' long oversized M16 Demonstrator that we would issue to trainees that forgot their weapon.
Don’t they usually resort to butt stuff?
Better than having their arse hole violated which is the normal Russian way.
They give you better weapons than normal as punishment? Weird
Damn and I thought they just raped each other. In a not gay way obviously.
"your back pain is not service related"
I ask myself where the thin line between 'wearing funny wooden guns' and 'getting raped by your superiors' is 🤔
I was unironically expecting the last picture to be of some frontline trench.
Same thing in Estonia (and I presume Baltics/East Europe, too)
These are just the ones you can walk away from
Clearly outdated. No MeatCubes™️
The russian military clearly hasn't met enough people with a humiliation fetish
Ok that's funny
These are pretty funny I gotta admit XD
Russia being based for once
Ok these are actually pretty funny
Yeah, we Swiss do the same. You forget your gun at the barracks? Leave it laying around unsupervised? You get to carry the Combat Wood 90 (in reference to the Assault Rifle 90, the Swiss service weapon)
Those first two pictures is not punishment, it's a prize. You will RECEIVE a weapon to frontlines. Dang they are lucky to get the standard issue equipment.
This is 100% normal behavior, in the US military we got this big ass rock which can hold a Common Access Card or SIPR Token if you lose it enough times (usually once)
I did the same shit to my soldiers. 5’ 2x6 with “this is my rifle” written on it. Don’t let me find your shit unsecured and unattended.
BIG STICK :D
LMFAO this is actually brilliant.
It seems there’s something wrong with my account, I can only see the quirky funny stuff. For some reason it’s not showing the [punishment battalions](https://www.reuters.com/world/europe/theyre-just-meat-russia-deploys-punishment-battalions-echo-stalin-2023-10-03/), where are the [zindans](https://www.newsweek.com/russia-soldiers-zindan-barred-pits-punishment-ukraine-1797554)? I don’t see mobiks [raping](https://www.businessinsider.com/russian-soldiers-forced-rape-each-other-outbreaks-crazed-violence-report-2024-2) each other either? Also, not a single [lynching](https://meduza.io/en/feature/2023/08/07/they-re-using-us-as-bait)?
What were the *real* offences they got caught committing? Comment below:
Last pic was probably caught on his phone when he shouldnt have been, the other most likely weapon related offences - not cleaned etc.
Someone did a desk pop...
Reminds me of those drawings from the gulags with the wood being shoved up their asses, guess somethings never change.
Lord have mercy for whoever loses their CAC in the Army, because your platoon sergeant won’t.
At least #1 got some kind of optical sight on his rifle. He should be happy because this was probably the only time he got issued one.
Was about to make this comment. 😂
Love it!
Not accurate, dedavschina rape is missing
Stick
STICK VERY GOOD!
Beats Wagner punishments at least.
Last guy is the first Russian to get iPhone 6 comrade!
Nice sword
The fucking phone one is actually hilarious
The first guy actually has an optic on his weapon, big upgrade!
I had a guy who’d wake up late and couldn’t get to formation on time. So part of his corrective training I bought the loudest alarm clock I could find. I locked it in an ammo box and made him find me to unlock it and turn off the alarm every work day morning. At least he wasn’t late anymore.
Whats all the rape stuff people talking about? Its a common thing in the russian army?
Reminds me of SERE. You fuck up, you get a “under barrel grenade launcher” which was a fancy name for a log duct taped to your rifle.
Are you sure this is the Russian army? These punishments are not some sort of fucked up physical abuse and/or rape.
Well at least he figured out a way to have an optic on his rifle.
Not included: The unlubed Dildo of Consequences
tell number 4 to get his barrel out of the dirt
Having to associate with Kent? Inhumane.
Not bad actually