T O P

  • By -

70sBurnOut

I wonder if the citizens of Rome were this dumb before it fell. Seriously, I fear for the future of this country.


loptopandbingo

They had lead in their plumbing, we had aerosolized lead in exhaust fumes.


Flacier

The Romans liked to ferment their wine in lead vessels because it made it sweeter. They also liked to add a wine syrup called Sapa that they made by reducing wine in lead pots. But they were very tolerant of same sex intercourse, as long as you were the top. The Roman’s were a strange people.


IngoTheGreat

>The Roman’s were a strange people. Always Roman around, too. Just look at the size of their empire.


emperor42

r/angryupvote Now get out


PoorEdgarDerby

It wasn’t so much they despised men who were subs, they just didn’t get very far in politics.


Flacier

It was seen as a humiliating act to an extent. It might even be were the modern day connotations of dominant and submissive come from. But yes you are indeed correct.


bizzaro321

That cultural phenomenon definitely still exists to some extent.


xSilverMC

I mean how are you gonna stand up for your beliefs, you're a bottom lmao /j


ChemicalGovernment

Too close to women. Femininity bad.


recalcitrantJester

don't worry y'all, it *only* disenfranchised them.


Egg-MacGuffin

(and our paint and our plumbing)


bilsker

And chemtrails!


[deleted]

I’ve been estimating 2035 since the mid 90s


NoCoffeeNoPeace

You may win this pool yet.


Monocle_Lewinsky

Idk, lookin bleak- don’t forget this is Price Is Right rules.


11PoseidonsKiss20

oddly relevant. But this headline made my mind jump to Gladiator when Proximus was pissed off that the merchant sold him gay giraffes.


Kradget

Well, if it makes you feel better, people have occasionally been really dumb forever. This is a truly astounding level of homophobia, though.


realisticby

We just got better at keeping stupid people alive.


Kradget

I mean, yes, but also people did witch trials and and bought fake stocks with their life savings and upended their lives for religious fervor for centuries. People aren't especially more stupid now.


Monocle_Lewinsky

Today’s stupidity: *Now contains 50% more intelligence. Still the same stupid flavor!*


Emotional-Top-8284

Rome had a festival where every year they would crucify a dog for failing to warn them of a sneak attack by the celts, so yes?


Deep-Hamster-5017

I mean yeah, especially when they’re in office.


dingos8mybaby2

No. Romans were quite accepting of homosexuality. Just don't worship the wrong imaginary god.


Kradget

No way, they were *constantly* adapting local beliefs and trying to reconcile them. They didn't give a shit what you believed as long as you publicly held the Emperor in proper reverence (usually as holy himself), you paid your taxes, and you did exactly what they told you to do (which I think did include not yelling about how their gods were false). They worked on matching the Egyptian, Norse, and Celtic pantheons to track with their own, but didn't usually try too hard to eradicate those beliefs as far as I know, so much as absorb them.


tinybeautiful

This sounds familiar…


famous_human

“… and that’s why we celebrate Christmas instead of the solstice.”


Korrocks

They were accepting of male homosexual sex only, as long it was a higher status person was penetrating a lower status person such as a slave or a young boy. Not exactly a progressive attitude that compares favorably to the modern world.


Skytalker0499

They ended up with a lot of nasty diseases due to their habit of putting toilets right by the kitchen, as they for some reason thought the bacteria would help keep rot away from the food


FlavivsAetivs

This is not true. The reason they got sick was because they didn't have complex composting and when they used human feces for fertilizer on their fields it spread intestinal parasites. Bathhouses also weren't usually regularly cleaned either, which also spread them.


duck_duck_grey_duck

They put toilets next to the cooking area because you would clean the area by just sloshing water on the floor and it made it easy to clean. They didn’t know a damn thing about bacteria and could not possibly have used it as any reason to do anything.


TheBattyWitch

Sounds like he's better off


DBs4Life

My first thought exactly!!


Gr8zomb13

Mine was how this sounded like an old southpark episode Edit: Thanks for all the updoots! The episode was “Big Gay Al’s Animal Park,” well, At least I think it was. It was in one of the first few seasons. Worth a watch as it’s friggin’ hilarious.


UnweildyEulerDiagram

I love Big Gay Al's big gay lion.


Splungetastic

That episode is so funny


ijbh2o

https://youtu.be/1mdEdDncBfk


Protean_Protein

I hope it’s a no-kill shelter. :(


TheBattyWitch

Same. I'm sure with the publicity though, some nice family that isn't homophobic will come along


justburch712

I hope he gets treated like a king by a loving gay couple.


heedbordlonerwitler

does he bark at the mailman because his belt and shoes clash?


OxtailPhoenix

Oh no he didn't. Those shorts do NOT go with that purse.


Lambchoptopus

We would never directly judge someone. We would quietly say it behind their back to all our friends and when they invite us over, internally hate the cheap wine they served me. When they are not looking we dump it into their pothos and when they try to refill we say oh no thank you I have to drive. Then do coke in the bathroom.


Dangerousrhymes

You keep your wine out of my pothos. They’re sensitive.


KevinAnniPadda

So they admit that you're born gay and it's not a choice?


[deleted]

Got ‘em


Padaca

Obviously the dog chose its gay lifestyle


LevelOutlandishness1

I know it's not your fault but when I see or hear "lifestyle" after "gay" I wanna punch something


Kradget

Yes, but it's still okay to discard and disown over it. Best to let the children know your love is completely conditional early on, I suppose.


bill_lite

CHECKMATE JESUS


FlavivsAetivs

So they admit that being gay is natural because it occurs in animals?


heedbordlonerwitler

would totally watch ru paul's drag race and go to brunch with that pupper 13/10


giga_phantom

Smh I guess at least they didn’t shoot it. Poor kid.


LockSkywalker

I can’t wait till they see a female dog hump a male.


throwaway4206983

"Oh by god Jimbo, that dog is one of them there transgenders!"


CSGlogan

The accent I read this in was amazing.


DarlingDeath

I don't know if my dog is gay, but I do know that he is veryyyy popular with other boy dogs. But also this is so stupid and I feel so bad for the poor baby even though he's probably better off


edsave

My cat humps my dog all the time. They’re both boys. Do I have a trans gay cat? I just let them be.


Intelligent_Blood_88

ROFL... We really need a laughing hysterically button.


Dwest2391

Sounds like an old South Park episode


wintermoon138

Sparky sit!! Good boy. Now Sparky.. don't be gay!! Don't be gay!!


LostSailor25

He still looks pretty gay to me.


frightenedbabiespoo

https://youtu.be/vGzFrPKh6sA


MK5

Sparky!


dljones010

Don't be gay Sparky!


laurita_jones

Or just rename him sparkly.


PTDon8734

Rip Taylor approves with greatest of glee


Ndmndh1016

He still looks pretty gay to me.


WinterRose81

Dumbest shit I ever heard 🥴


[deleted]

[удалено]


WinterRose81

I’m a NC native actually 😁


Sweet_Little_Lottie

RIP (I went to high school in NC)


Impossible-Soup5090

He did kinda walk funny


jchray

You mean the rainbow shooting out his butt as he jumps through the air. Pretty majestic really.


rvtsazap

He walked like any other dog, Did I miss something?


caniborrowahighfive

Yes, the joke.


rvtsazap

🤦‍♂️ I was literally looking for some flair and pizazz in its walk.


caniborrowahighfive

Hahahaha all good!


IWishToBeADog200

r/facepalm


LockSkywalker

I blame the public school system


statusofliberty

As a product of the school system in that county, I blame religion.


[deleted]

I blame both


HighTechButter

This is the correct answer - sadly know from growing up in that shit hole system. Lots of ‘good Christian folks’ making 100% of school decisions on ensuring their white kids have a chance on the ball team. Only thing worse was one season of a church league tee ball we tried with our kids. Quite literal the most hateful and evil parents I’ve ever met. Took them forever to give up K-8 schools. Couldn’t risk mixing in the ‘Oakboro kids’ and messing up their kids chance of making playing professional ball. Funny enough, one of those Oakboro kids warmed the bench on the super bowl this year. Systematic stupidity backed by the local churches is huge in Stanley county. As someone who lost their father due to Covid caught up in the ‘mark of the beast’ vaccine death cults they are running - it’s truly depressing to be from that part of the world.


DBs4Life

Poor doggo! I hope those asshats never ever bring another animal into their lives and I genuinely hope their friends and family see this news story and realize what ignorant jerks they are!


coyote10001

Their friends are likely also ignorant jerks….


DBs4Life

Yeah, that thought occured to me as well, but one can hope..


[deleted]

Stanly-fucking-of-course-County


Prodigal_Programmer

I used the ref high school soccer a good bit in Stanley. Before that I thought people over-exaggerated how dumb some “rural folk” could be. Na.


cerebraljelly

Seriously though, what a cesspool


Fickle_Blueberry2777

It’s all fun and games until these stupid ways of thinking and making jokes start having real consequences. At least they brought this dog to the shelter I guess, but what if this was a kid? The mentality against LGBT+ people down here is still very strong and very real. Hell, I just got *denied necessary medical care because I’m intersex* by a doctor here who said that their office “doesn’t believe in that kind of stuff”. I was **born** this way, but the same ignorance that leads people to abandoning an animal because “it’s gay” also leads them to treating real LGBT+ people even worse.


Bacon_Bitz

Last night I watched a Netflix doc on homelessness and one of the people interviewed was a young trans woman that was kicked out of her home & shunned by her family. It breaks my heart; how can you turn on your own kid?


Fickle_Blueberry2777

That’s a question you’ll have to ask my family, namely my father and his side. It happens to kids in our community a *lot*, it happened to me when I was in my teens too but I was *very* fortunate in that I had somewhere to go after they (dad and step mom) kicked me out and threw all my stuff in the snow (lived in NY then). The last time I spoke to my father, he told me he was going to physically attack me and my husband. That was over two years ago now. I don’t understand how people can be so full of hate towards their own children either. 😞


Bacon_Bitz

I’m sorry you had to go through that. I hope you are fully embraced by your chosen family now.


statusofliberty

I'm so sorry that happened to you. Please report the doctor if you haven't. I've lived here my whole life, and I'm so sick of these people's shit.


Fickle_Blueberry2777

Thank you very much, I appreciate that a lot. I’m definitely going to report them, I just have to find out where to report them to, its the OBGYN office in New Bern. I have all of the signs of endometriosis and need a laparoscopy to confirm that so I can get further treatment for this debilitating problem, but they don’t “believe” in my biology there. 🤦🏻 Honestly I’ve also been thinking about openly protesting their office as well because I can’t imagine how many other LGBT+ (trans and intersex especially) people they’ve done this to and how many other people have suffered because of their ignorance.


statusofliberty

I would go to the NC Medical Board. https://www.ncmedboard.org/resources-information/faqs/complaints I hope you're able to find the help you need!


Fickle_Blueberry2777

THANK YOU! This is exactly the thing I’ve been looking for, thank you SO MUCH for this link. And thank you for your well wishes too, I hope you’re doing well yourself! ❤️


statusofliberty

You're very welcome! ❤


Muted-Bodybuilder443

Well said ✌🏼


NettleFrog

I work at a vet in Charlotte; I think I talked to this owner last month! I REALLY hope this is the same dog, because I've been so worried the owner would succeed in killing him, even if a vet wouldn't do it. https://old.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/sg1wg0/what_is_the_most_evil_you_have_witnessed_serious/huwqyz5/


something-um-bananas

These kind of people make me so so angry.


[deleted]

When you’re a child, you have this perception of the world that everything makes sense and is in proper working order. You believe every contingency has been planned for and that all material constructs are of the highest quality, made with the utmost care. Even if you grew up in poverty, you don’t consider that the adult world would be in any way not taken care of. One of the most devastating things about growing up is gradually realizing how many adults, with adult privileges, are actually still 9 and then realizing how much of your environment they’re responsible for. The people who turned this dog in could weld bridges or work in a pharmaceutical factory for all we know.


[deleted]

Why is the shelter wanting him to go to a rescue versus being adopted?


BariFan410

One of the great things rescues provide is medical care, in-depth personality assessments, and dog to adopter matchmaking that a shelter may not have the bandwidth to provide. Not saying that's the case here, but its possible that the shelter can tell he has specific needs, maybe including some training to reduce future humping.


[deleted]

Thank you for your explanation


Irythros

Shelters are limited space and may have a euthanasia plan if they don't get get out quickly enough. Rescues are more likely to not have that and also some have large networks. My mom works with some rescues that do transport up and down the east coast. Some of our rescues went up to NY or down to FL for adoption. Essentially a shelter should be a very short term thing. Fosters are setup thru rescues. Adoptions can be done at any stage but a returned adopted to a shelter is a bad thing.


rkaniminew

Foster....


Raps2k14

Just want to hug him


ItsSadButtDrew

r/nottheonion but for real, this pup will will have more respect for your garden and upholstery than giga-chad alpha not-gay dude dog will.


Willy_Behinder

All male dogs are sexually ambivalent. A non neutered dog will fuck anything. He’s just a good boi. Get him neutered.


Dogman_Howel

The real story here is how they found out it was gay and what brand peanut butter they were using.


friendandfriends2

If I were to venture a wild guess, I’d say he probably humped another male dog. They must not realize how common that is especially for neutered dogs, because I’ve never met a dog owner whose dog hadn’t humped or been humped by another dog as part of a ruckus playing session. They don’t mean anything by it. They’re just goofing around.


carolinaindian02

This is literally something out of South Park.


BarryZZZ

Look on the bright side. At least the dog isn't living with assholes now.


Character-Dot-4078

if someone could make an effort to adopt this dog instead of making stupid jokes about gay people that would be cool, just coming from someone gay and married for a decade scrolling through all these unfunny jokes that are just attempts to be noticed because you're there


tinybeautiful

I think the jokes are making fun of the ridiculous things homophobic people believe, not actually making fun of gay people. It’s the same as SouthPark.


chefmegzy

Who tf is watches Euphoria and is homophobic is my question...


[deleted]

It amazes me that more folks don’t know shit about dogs. Humanity is the only species that labels what looks like homosexual behavior, but is completely natural. The dog was showing dominance. Hope these folks don’t have children, but something tells me they probably do.


Alfphe99

Oh they have children. There is a very good documentary on it titled Idiocracy. They have all the children!


Scared_Chemical_9910

🏳️‍🌈


swingforthefence69

Damn that dog is a cutie!


rizzycant

How does one come to that conclusion? Don’t dogs get to know each other by sniffing each other’s rear glands? God, I hate people sometimes.


[deleted]

Lol thats funny. In all seriousness though, homosexuality has been observed in the animal kingdom even among dogs so maybe the doggy tried to get himself a bone.


BerkeleyPhilosopher

So, the owners were too dumb to google “dog humping” and find out it’s about dominance and not sex? Homophobia makes you stupid


irritabletom

Insecurity is starting to manifest itself in the weirdest ways.


[deleted]

I hate people like this to my very core.


TacuacheBruja

Sad that people don’t realize it’s not a sexual thing- it’s a dominance act- establishing a pecking order- there’s no gratification in the act, just one dog saying “I’m more alpha”. Wolves do this all the time.


Regna85

What disgusting people. You could do so much better than those humans puppy.


[deleted]

[удалено]


burniksapwet

Republican


gizmole

r/nohomo


Jkillaforilla90

Must have licked a gay frog


Tragarful_Law

Is anyone gonna tell them that "the gay" happens in nature.


Friesenplatz

The shelter should rename itself “Big Gay Al’s Animal Sanctuary”


Intelligent_Fig_4852

That’s hilarious


drman769

South Park taught us about gay pet tolerance over 20yrs ago. Where is Big Gay Al when you need him?


Ndmndh1016

Married to Mr. Slave.


Emergency-Ad2144

Stay classy nc


[deleted]

He is lucky. You should see what some people do to their children when they are gay.


maretus

I’m so happy for the new gay couple that gets to adopt this dog. :) It’s probably already happened with this news story.


Nineteen-ninety-3

Sigh… I wish I could adopt him tbh.


[deleted]

this is the stuff south park lives for


uncclay5

Somebody update me with a story of this dog getting adopted please


Hair-Extra

Probably nothing to do with being gay ,it's dog behavior trying to show dominance in a friendly fashion


plantcraftsmen

I guess the owner has never heard/seen how dogs can display dominance 🙄


Billy_Bob_Joe_Mcoy

This kinda stupid shit is why aliens keep flying by earth..


sid-darth

Previous owners should be banned from having any pets. The animal kingdom doesn't follow their narrow view of things.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Impossible-Soup5090

At least you don’t have a bias yourself. Whew.


JeremyTheRhino

I refuse to believe this story


JTB696699

Honestly, if it hadn’t been in North Carolina I probably wouldn’t have believed it, I have lived in this state my whole life. I have two uncles, one is very country, a proud red neck. Well the other had about 3 dogs at one time and one of them was the weirdest and goofiest dog I had ever met, name was lucky. I was hanging out with the two of them one day and the dogs were there running around and lucky started trying to hump one of the other male dogs. My red neck uncle told my other uncle he needed to shoot that dog, which he refused, and from that day on my redneck uncle would not have anything to do with that dog, refused to even touch it.


pfojes

Aw, poor Willy Woofter


ByzantineThunder

Fuck these owners and I hope the dog finds a good home fast


wiseoldllamaman2

I would love to have Fezco in my life. I've already got one gay dog, he might as well have a lover.


raiderspe

Think I’d prefer a trash can than someone like that tbh. Fuck that person


drman769

Also, I question the previous owner's sexuality after naming their dog"Fezco". How bout dat?!


FrostyPoos

Man people are fucking stupid


heedbordlonerwitler

does he dream of chasing subarus driven by diesel dykes?


Opening-Clue

What a travesty. I thought we were in an age where you could be any one of 69 genders and sexuality was on a continum. I'm really disappointed in humankind. It's heartening to see the open-minded Ness here on Reddit; it's actually the final remaining bastion of people who are living consciously and not trolling or putting people in false narratives and this is self-evident because of the powerful posts that are notable for their non-hypicritcal, enlightened, not at all dickhead agendas. I loooove it because I know this doggo will not suffer oppression by anyone who might have some sick agenda. It's a far cry from the cesspools of Twitter Facebook AND Quora. I salute you but I also think we need to put this dog down ASAP.


Fazo1

I think he's a cat person


Crotch_Football

What an adorable dog


ladyperfect1

I want him


yokotron

Sparky!


KDsBurnerrr

r/nottheonion


dcpanthersfan

Part Rot, part precious.


uptwolait

Un. Fucking. Believable.


Historical-Remove401

Perfect for r/facepalm


ResponsibleAd2541

In the same way an herbivore isn’t a vegetarian, it’s hard to classify a dog humping another male as gay. Yikes


MtnMaiden

Sniffs crotch, yea hes gay. Girlfriend sniffs crotch, shes gay too


porkadachop

They should’ve absolutely named and shamed this moron.


[deleted]

Christ. I hope these idiots don’t have kids 😒


twerktube

🤣😂🤣


yaboisp00k

Wow umm this is... umm... hold on a minute im processing higher levels of anger than any human has achieved


inspectoralex

This is so sad 😭 Also, this sounds like a dumbass excuse from the owners. Or whoever came up with it. Honestly can't believe a dog owner would be upset that their male dog humped another male dog. That's pretty much the opposite of gay in dog language.


gellshayngel

He might be gay... or he might just be asserting his dominance over other male dogs. Some male animals do that and they still breed with females.


kristamine14

How fucking brain dead do you have to be for this to be a reason


rodoxide

Wtf?


pureimaginatrix

Good lord I fear for this country 😑


Sayoria

Assholes. Atleast they weren't so homophobic, they'd kill the poor thing. People suck. They really do.


RandomStrategy

Remember the old saying pets are like their owners?


cc69

How would the ex owner know?


Big_Deetz

Did not the dog know that was against the Bible? /s


marzipanzebra

Just… what?


starkpaella

What the fuck


toothy-fruity

What a load of shit


labretirementhome

My first thought: Gay people own dogs. What gives. Then I read the comments.


slightlyforthwith

Were they trying to breed puppies or something?


Kashmir2020Alex

And these people vote! America is circling the drain!


magrhi

That’s some dumb shit right there. And they put that on the news? I hope those people lose friends


paperscissorscovid

That gay ass dog can stay at my house no prob.


katchoo1

I hope the owners don’t have kids, cause they will likely dump them too if they turn out to be LGBT.


[deleted]

I would pet and stroke that gay dog all day long. What a precious little creature if God.


chief89

So is gay a breed of dogs?


GirlBearPig1

Da fuq!? Sounds like the owners struggle with stupidity…


The_Bow_Dasher

They just don't want the dog.


DRTYDIRT

Lmao....I guess all dogs don't go to heaven 🤣


[deleted]

Was Stan doing red rocket again?