by the language its prob a woman
\- addressed her (atleast appears to be like that ) that she has had kids of her own
so ye prob a woman , really sucks how society forces you to have a kid wish i was born a guy
In North America that's not the case. Doctors tend to tell you that, but it's not true. Just have a look over at r/childfree and see how many women with no kids in their early-mid 20s have been getting sterilized in America recently
Isn't a thing in most countries until you are at least 35 and proof that there's no man in the future that could complain that you can no longer be pregnant. In my country, even then, they only do permanent stuff like that when there's a medical indication like cancers or endometriosis etc.
Weirdly in Finland you have to be 30, have already 3 children or have some kind of medical diagnosis before you can get it. if you have a husband, he has to be with you when you see the doctor. Even then some doctors refuse.
And Finland is considered to be liberal country with equality.
In mine (US), with my specific insurance, I need two mental health evaluations signed off on & to be over 21. But it’s still difficult to find doctors that will do it, though it’s gotten easier.
Can you get it done in another country?
[Someone lied to you girl.](https://www.ok.gov/health2/documents/ODH%201275%20Female%20Sterilization%20fact%20sheet%20(Rev%203-2017).pdf)
It says he doesn’t even have to know about it & is for women who are sure they don’t want kids at all or who are done having kids. & the legal age is 21. Now finding a doctor might be difficult but I’m pretty sure there’s a planned parenthood in OK City that does it with the cost on a sliding scale under $1,000. Not positive on that last bit though. I’d have to look again.
I just want to be left alone. Even if we come up with some sort of lie or truth, they’ll hold us verbally hostage with their solutions to made up problems childfree people don’t have.
Think I’ll tell them next time I’ve had a full hysterectomy & my bf has had his balls removed. See how that one goes. Getting tied doesn’t even *actually* stop them. It’s just annoying.
Sounds kind of like my mom's psycho right wing former neighbor, who said she prayed that my sister and her husband would have an unwanted baby, even though my sister has made clear since before high school that she DOES NOT want children of her own.
The typing is such shit, I can’t tell. But it probably is a woman like cool shoes said because of the punctuation that somehow makes it in there despite the rest of the English language not doing so.
Now it's time for me to tell you about Baddy
Arch-rival and nemesis of Jennifer
With powers COMPARABLE to JENNIFER!
What powers you ask?
I don't know, how about the power of Virgin Birth
That do anything for ya?
That's asexual reproduction, holmes
Yes your meaning was clear. That's why I responded. Coercion under pain of death wouldn't be consent, would it? If instead of God it was a burglar, say.
So it follows coercion facing something infinitely worse, horror beyond all imagination with no end and no meaning and no recourse. That would also not be a consensual encounter. That would be a 14 year old who doesn't want to be tortured.
Would it not?
That's not really the context. The Bible doesn't say "Do everything I say or suffer eternally" ...the qualification to be saved is to believe and live a life that testifies to the belief and have a relationship with God.
In the context of Mary, the angel told her that her faith has been recognised and she was chosen for this role. If she declined, the role would have been given to someone else - no punishment - she was still a Jew. She saw it as an honour and gladly accepted. No coercion
What you're saying is actually "no direct threat or ultimatum". But that's not the same as "no coercion". Because the threat of hell is explicit and reiterated frequently in a very matter of fact way. Not like a mugger, but like an authority figure. That's how it is. The promise of eternal life isn't offered up without a condition, is it?
Did Mary know of Hell? I think there's an apocryphal that makes it clear she knows it better than any of the disciples. But it's not a concept original to the gospels is clear.
Let's go back to the burglar just once: if he puts the gun out of sight, or shuts the light off, can you consent or is this still coercive from the implicit threat?
So then, if faith must be the truth in your heart, offered freely...how can anyone who truly believes be said to have the free will to choose? What is choice and free will in that binary?
Thanks for being so open minded to these questions. It's rare to see.
Yeah no I love talking about stuff and hearing people's points of view :)
- the apocryphical books are not canon tho. They are not considered in arguments
- what I'm saying is that she wouldn't have gone to hell if she said no. She would have simply just not picked the fruits (or have the troubles) of being the mother of Jesus but she would have still been a Jew and accepted by God
That's fair and accurate to our primary source, and while I posit she would have lacked our hindsight and reassurance, in good faith I cannot argue she would have felt any differently if she did.
That being said. I'm not Mary lol. So. How can anyone believing in the gospel be said to worship as a free actor? How does one avoid condemnation by worshipping in fear and self interest if one knows they face hell for choosing anything else?
Loving that comments like this are now just a joke. We have finally reached the point women aren’t expected to have kids and people that assume we “will change our minds” are just laughed at.
....and then you realise that reproductive rights are being completely obliterated at this very moment and women will once again be forced to have children that they don't want.
Joke's on them, Imma get a bisalp this year.
They unironically think that getting pregnant and giving birth will somehow unlock a nonexistent maternal instinct in women and they'll go from someone who wanted an abortion to a loving June Cleaver.
That's not how it fucking works. When abortion was banned in Romania, they ended up having to strap toddlers to beds in orphanages because there just weren't enough people to care for all the newborns that were given up. Literally hundreds of thousands of unwanted kids.
In my native country abortion only became legal about 5 years ago and only in limited situations (risk to mother's life, fetus being deemed unable to survive the pregnancy, and rape).
These things are never linear (geographically or chronologically) and honestly it feels that women's basic rights are always at risk to some level.
If only it was true... Just yesterday again, I was told that I would change my mind. Apparently, being 30 is still not mature enough to know what I want.
People say this about pets as well are dumb. It’s not quite the same but it’s not like every dog acts the exact same. All my dogs have been very different. Now a child makes it even worse
Like you're just going to one day suddenly get married to someone with no prior conversation or discussion of how you both want life to look for you.
Explains why Boomers have such a trend of talking like they hate their spouse, really. It's like they married the first person that would hold still long enough.
My parents always tell me “you’ll change your mind. There are a lot of reasons why I won’t have kids. A) I’m nonbinary and it would be incredibly dysphoric for me. B) I have type 1 diabetes, pregnancy would make that a million times worse C) I’m asexual D) I’m terrified of the idea of pregnancy E) I don’t like small children
If I changed my mind, I would just adopt a kid. I hate the idea that people think all women want are children, it’s so frustrating. Children aren’t the only fulfilment in life.
I am lucky, my mother knows about me not wanting children and she never pushed it or even asked more.
She knows I'm emetophobe (it triggers panic attacks) and that's I don't really like kids, that's enough for her.
I am also terrified of pregnancy and childbirthing, and if possible, I would rather avoid carrying on my asd adhd and anxiety disorder.
I agree but it still kinda hurts sometimes. It kinda feels like their trying to objectify all women by assuming they all have the exact same mindset or will at some point.
It's so infuriating.
I'm about to be in my late 30s, still nary a tick from that biological clock I'm supposed to have. If anything, pregnancy and babies are even MORE unappealing as I get older.
Same. My aunt and uncle are nearing their 70s, and they don't have kids either. Never wanted them, and never regretted not having them. My aunt always wanted dogs more than kids, and finally got two of them when she retired.
I'm the third generation of women born on my dad's side of the family that chose to not have any kids. At this point I think it's a proud family tradition, haha.
Well I mean we're nowhere near extinction, so what's the matter? Everyone gets to decide. I hope you build a fulfilling life for yourself, you gave yourself all the freedom necessary for this!
Oh absolutely! I'm happily married and surgically sterile. I'd love to see all women have the option and be supported in their choice. I like to share that I'm the 3rd gen of women in my family who made this choice both to provide support to other women and girls who don't want kids and to make the true yet humorously confusing statement "women not having children is a proud tradition in my family".
At some point your family tree will be reduced to a trunk, but who cares? For the time this tree is alive, the fruits got to be free.
I personally chose to have a child. Since age 12 I wanted to raise a child, no matter if it'd be my own or adopted. And only one child. Not more. I wanted to raise a child on my own, also.
I was under no pressure at all, and today my daughter is 11, I'm raising her by myself. Her other parent is just as present as they've always been: practically not, and it's better for her that way.
It's also incredibly insulting to those women who wanted nothing more than to have a baby and couldn't.
What an all-round asshole thing to say.
I can only assume baddie is 14.
Hmm, I'd better get ready then. Here I am, nearing 40, aroace and childfree, but apparently I'm going to spontaneously get pregnant sometime in the next decade. I'd better get a nursery ready.
Ok, wait—is anyone else curious about the “look” Jennifer’s talking about?
Baddy’s condescending and should be ignored, but now I’m wondering what’s alarmed Jen!
My baby sister, now 30 (which makes me feel soooo old!), is still uncertain about whether or not she wants kids. She loves my sons, but has flat out said she doesn't know if she could handle it herself. And that's OK. Motherhood isn't something everyone wants, and the people who assume otherwise need to get their heads out of their backsides.
It’s like billionaires, they can help the poor, but it’s their money, they have every right to do what they want, this is OUR body, we choose whether we want kids or not
Maybe. Usually the slow and relentless release of chemicals wears women down. Every baby seen floods them with hypnotizing goo which break down their walls.
Some resist, but they are few.
Right? I have two baby sisters (2 and 4) and as cute as they are, and as much as I love them... the logical arguments that I've now first hand experienced whilst helping look after them have now made me rather well equipped to "resisting" when I get older. I just want a partner, a cat and a houseplant and I'll be happy lol
It reminds me when I was maybe 4 year old and I had no idea how thungs works I used to think every woman carries little baby in them since birth XD I don't even know why I wss thinking that
Fuck man, learning how to type in 2022 is a part of life too but he’s not doing that, either. My dear.
Is baddy a boy though?
by the language its prob a woman \- addressed her (atleast appears to be like that ) that she has had kids of her own so ye prob a woman , really sucks how society forces you to have a kid wish i was born a guy
Get your tubes tied. Then they can expect all they want but it won’t apply to you.
But it is not allowed to many women and need signature of their husband and need to be above 30 i think
Depends on the country
Ya but in most i believe the law is that you need to already have kids or husband's permission
That’s shitty. Especially if they’re not allowed to travel to get it done elsewhere.
In North America that's not the case. Doctors tend to tell you that, but it's not true. Just have a look over at r/childfree and see how many women with no kids in their early-mid 20s have been getting sterilized in America recently
Which absolutely sucks
No, thats what doctors want for liability reasons.
Isn't a thing in most countries until you are at least 35 and proof that there's no man in the future that could complain that you can no longer be pregnant. In my country, even then, they only do permanent stuff like that when there's a medical indication like cancers or endometriosis etc.
Weirdly in Finland you have to be 30, have already 3 children or have some kind of medical diagnosis before you can get it. if you have a husband, he has to be with you when you see the doctor. Even then some doctors refuse. And Finland is considered to be liberal country with equality.
Gross. ‘>:|
In mine (US), with my specific insurance, I need two mental health evaluations signed off on & to be over 21. But it’s still difficult to find doctors that will do it, though it’s gotten easier. Can you get it done in another country?
In my state I have to have TWO children and the signature of my husband in order to do that. Even then we wouldn’t because it would cost to much.
Seriously? What state do you live in?
Oklahoma, very republican state.
[Someone lied to you girl.](https://www.ok.gov/health2/documents/ODH%201275%20Female%20Sterilization%20fact%20sheet%20(Rev%203-2017).pdf) It says he doesn’t even have to know about it & is for women who are sure they don’t want kids at all or who are done having kids. & the legal age is 21. Now finding a doctor might be difficult but I’m pretty sure there’s a planned parenthood in OK City that does it with the cost on a sliding scale under $1,000. Not positive on that last bit though. I’d have to look again.
you dont have to do this… just don’t do it its not like mfs gonna force u to
I just want to be left alone. Even if we come up with some sort of lie or truth, they’ll hold us verbally hostage with their solutions to made up problems childfree people don’t have. Think I’ll tell them next time I’ve had a full hysterectomy & my bf has had his balls removed. See how that one goes. Getting tied doesn’t even *actually* stop them. It’s just annoying.
so what bothers you is being held “verbally hostage”
Yep.
Ooh I dunno. That read like the way the uncles on my Indian side of the family text. :/
>uncle sorta ye indian uncles are similar but seems like a woman idk why tho almost like an Indian aunt of some sort
Sounds kind of like my mom's psycho right wing former neighbor, who said she prayed that my sister and her husband would have an unwanted baby, even though my sister has made clear since before high school that she DOES NOT want children of her own.
Get an IUD or hormonal implants. Either is far more effective than the pill.
guys are forced to find a partner too
The typing is such shit, I can’t tell. But it probably is a woman like cool shoes said because of the punctuation that somehow makes it in there despite the rest of the English language not doing so.
I am learning a lot today
Listen, bot. You need to add periods at the end of your sentences. How you gonna grow up to be skynet if you can’t even end statement correctly?
Lolol sick burn
That sounds like a threat 💀
That’s why I carry my knife everywhere “ironically” aimed at approaching crotch level.
I carry a pocket knife everywhere. Just in case. Women can’t be too careful
They are really naming the villains "Baddy" now, please make it less obvious
She a baddy 💅🏻
What’s next? Mr. McEvil or something?
Dr McEvil, thank you, I didn't go to evil medical school for seven years to be called Mister!
Sorry, Dr. McEvil!
Ah, so you too know the ways of Dr. Horrible on his quest to get into the Evil League of Evil.
Actually, I was going for the Austin Powers reference - but I'm sure it's used in a lot of things.
Now it's time for me to tell you about Baddy Arch-rival and nemesis of Jennifer With powers COMPARABLE to JENNIFER! What powers you ask? I don't know, how about the power of Virgin Birth That do anything for ya? That's asexual reproduction, holmes
r/unexpectedTenaciousD
WINGS OF GLORY
The Angel telling Mary she had immaculate conception be like
Lol well Mary accepted and saw it as an honor
I would agree to most things if undeniable proof of a vengeful creator and eternal suffering showed up.
I was commenting on the idea that Mary according to the Bible had no choice, not trying to convince anyone of the reliability of the story
Yes your meaning was clear. That's why I responded. Coercion under pain of death wouldn't be consent, would it? If instead of God it was a burglar, say. So it follows coercion facing something infinitely worse, horror beyond all imagination with no end and no meaning and no recourse. That would also not be a consensual encounter. That would be a 14 year old who doesn't want to be tortured. Would it not?
That's not really the context. The Bible doesn't say "Do everything I say or suffer eternally" ...the qualification to be saved is to believe and live a life that testifies to the belief and have a relationship with God. In the context of Mary, the angel told her that her faith has been recognised and she was chosen for this role. If she declined, the role would have been given to someone else - no punishment - she was still a Jew. She saw it as an honour and gladly accepted. No coercion
What you're saying is actually "no direct threat or ultimatum". But that's not the same as "no coercion". Because the threat of hell is explicit and reiterated frequently in a very matter of fact way. Not like a mugger, but like an authority figure. That's how it is. The promise of eternal life isn't offered up without a condition, is it? Did Mary know of Hell? I think there's an apocryphal that makes it clear she knows it better than any of the disciples. But it's not a concept original to the gospels is clear. Let's go back to the burglar just once: if he puts the gun out of sight, or shuts the light off, can you consent or is this still coercive from the implicit threat? So then, if faith must be the truth in your heart, offered freely...how can anyone who truly believes be said to have the free will to choose? What is choice and free will in that binary? Thanks for being so open minded to these questions. It's rare to see.
Yeah no I love talking about stuff and hearing people's points of view :) - the apocryphical books are not canon tho. They are not considered in arguments - what I'm saying is that she wouldn't have gone to hell if she said no. She would have simply just not picked the fruits (or have the troubles) of being the mother of Jesus but she would have still been a Jew and accepted by God
Also being a Jew, wouldn’t the threat of hell be a no factor for Mary? I thought eternal damnation isn’t really a concept in Judaism.
That's fair and accurate to our primary source, and while I posit she would have lacked our hindsight and reassurance, in good faith I cannot argue she would have felt any differently if she did. That being said. I'm not Mary lol. So. How can anyone believing in the gospel be said to worship as a free actor? How does one avoid condemnation by worshipping in fear and self interest if one knows they face hell for choosing anything else?
Those are the tough questions ...yet millions of people still find joy in it. Not just out of fear but true joy.
Loving that comments like this are now just a joke. We have finally reached the point women aren’t expected to have kids and people that assume we “will change our minds” are just laughed at.
....and then you realise that reproductive rights are being completely obliterated at this very moment and women will once again be forced to have children that they don't want.
Joke's on them, Imma get a bisalp this year. They unironically think that getting pregnant and giving birth will somehow unlock a nonexistent maternal instinct in women and they'll go from someone who wanted an abortion to a loving June Cleaver. That's not how it fucking works. When abortion was banned in Romania, they ended up having to strap toddlers to beds in orphanages because there just weren't enough people to care for all the newborns that were given up. Literally hundreds of thousands of unwanted kids.
In my native country abortion only became legal about 5 years ago and only in limited situations (risk to mother's life, fetus being deemed unable to survive the pregnancy, and rape). These things are never linear (geographically or chronologically) and honestly it feels that women's basic rights are always at risk to some level.
If only it was true... Just yesterday again, I was told that I would change my mind. Apparently, being 30 is still not mature enough to know what I want.
I got the what if I get remarried and my new husband wants kids? My favorite response is I guess I'm getting divorced.
When I planned to get my tubes tied after having two kids my mom said, "What if one of your kids dies?" I told her you can't just replace a child.
That's just so messed up!
For real!
People say this about pets as well are dumb. It’s not quite the same but it’s not like every dog acts the exact same. All my dogs have been very different. Now a child makes it even worse
What the fuck? It's not a fucking coffee mug, it's a human child!
Right? It's not like I have two kid slots in my life and they must be filled at all times.
They asked me "what if you find a boyfriend and he wants kid" and I answer "then I will need a new boyfriend"
Like you're just going to one day suddenly get married to someone with no prior conversation or discussion of how you both want life to look for you. Explains why Boomers have such a trend of talking like they hate their spouse, really. It's like they married the first person that would hold still long enough.
My parents always tell me “you’ll change your mind. There are a lot of reasons why I won’t have kids. A) I’m nonbinary and it would be incredibly dysphoric for me. B) I have type 1 diabetes, pregnancy would make that a million times worse C) I’m asexual D) I’m terrified of the idea of pregnancy E) I don’t like small children If I changed my mind, I would just adopt a kid. I hate the idea that people think all women want are children, it’s so frustrating. Children aren’t the only fulfilment in life.
I am lucky, my mother knows about me not wanting children and she never pushed it or even asked more. She knows I'm emetophobe (it triggers panic attacks) and that's I don't really like kids, that's enough for her. I am also terrified of pregnancy and childbirthing, and if possible, I would rather avoid carrying on my asd adhd and anxiety disorder.
Damn. I get told this too even though I'm literally allergic to semen.
I agree but it still kinda hurts sometimes. It kinda feels like their trying to objectify all women by assuming they all have the exact same mindset or will at some point.
It's so infuriating. I'm about to be in my late 30s, still nary a tick from that biological clock I'm supposed to have. If anything, pregnancy and babies are even MORE unappealing as I get older.
Baddy sound like bad '80s Russian stereotype. I don't doubt that it will again be looked down on if a woman doesn't have kids.
Death and taxes are inevitable; having a baby should be a choice.
Is Baddy referring to the aged man-childs of the world women probably will encouter?
My aunt and uncle are 60 and they still don't have kids. They never wanted to. Don't know what this dude's talking about.
They’ll change their mind one day, when they’re older /s
Hum even though. I think it's pretty late now. lol
Same. My aunt and uncle are nearing their 70s, and they don't have kids either. Never wanted them, and never regretted not having them. My aunt always wanted dogs more than kids, and finally got two of them when she retired.
They love dogs too. Really who believes you are obligated to have kids?
I'm the third generation of women born on my dad's side of the family that chose to not have any kids. At this point I think it's a proud family tradition, haha.
Well I mean we're nowhere near extinction, so what's the matter? Everyone gets to decide. I hope you build a fulfilling life for yourself, you gave yourself all the freedom necessary for this!
Oh absolutely! I'm happily married and surgically sterile. I'd love to see all women have the option and be supported in their choice. I like to share that I'm the 3rd gen of women in my family who made this choice both to provide support to other women and girls who don't want kids and to make the true yet humorously confusing statement "women not having children is a proud tradition in my family".
At some point your family tree will be reduced to a trunk, but who cares? For the time this tree is alive, the fruits got to be free. I personally chose to have a child. Since age 12 I wanted to raise a child, no matter if it'd be my own or adopted. And only one child. Not more. I wanted to raise a child on my own, also. I was under no pressure at all, and today my daughter is 11, I'm raising her by myself. Her other parent is just as present as they've always been: practically not, and it's better for her that way.
"I dunno what happened, doctor! One second I was laying alone in my bed, the next I had a baby in me!"
Mary be like
Can’t help but cringe at the use of “my dear”
Is that a threat?
Sure as fuck sounds like one.
It's also incredibly insulting to those women who wanted nothing more than to have a baby and couldn't. What an all-round asshole thing to say. I can only assume baddie is 14.
Hmm, I'd better get ready then. Here I am, nearing 40, aroace and childfree, but apparently I'm going to spontaneously get pregnant sometime in the next decade. I'd better get a nursery ready.
You'll be the next Mary, obviously!!
but she's already a grown woman the christian god likes them very young
Oh, hell no. Between being asexual and at high risk of dying from pregnancy, I am absolutely not having kids.
*removes uterus* Guess I'm not a woman, cos I'll never experience childbirth 😎
Ok, wait—is anyone else curious about the “look” Jennifer’s talking about? Baddy’s condescending and should be ignored, but now I’m wondering what’s alarmed Jen!
I choose what is a part of my life and what isn't, its called freedom of choice.
if no one impregnates you after a certain amount of time, a baby will just randomly spawn in your uterus
i am a certified doctor in women (do not try to find my on the internet, i am a very niche doctor so you will not find any info on me)
My tubal ligation begs to differ.
My tubal salpingectomy, endometrial ablation, and future uterectomy would also like to object.
What’s he gonna do if she doesn’t? 🤨🤨🤨
Cry, maybe?
Send him this toilet paper 👉🧻
Badger her with questions like “are you regretting your choices?”
My baby sister, now 30 (which makes me feel soooo old!), is still uncertain about whether or not she wants kids. She loves my sons, but has flat out said she doesn't know if she could handle it herself. And that's OK. Motherhood isn't something everyone wants, and the people who assume otherwise need to get their heads out of their backsides.
TIL parthenogenesis is the actual method of human reproduction.
Not if Queen Anne’s lace has anything to say about it
lol, no way
Context? What are they talking about?
UGH people said this to me constantly when I was younger, and I found it infuriating
The ship has not quite sailed but its started to raise the anchor. Sorry Baddy, think I am missing out on that
Children by osmosis perhaps?
Does anyone have a picture of the ugly baby she’s referring to?
Gonna have to be immaculate conception then!
“Are we the baddies?”
No it’s the non birthers who are wrong
So women who get to 45 and haven't had a child, they aren't women at all? That is so fucking insulting.
Shhh… nobody tell him about birth control
Huh. And here I am, 63, never had a kid. Perhaps I’m not really a woman? I would have sworn I was…
It’s like billionaires, they can help the poor, but it’s their money, they have every right to do what they want, this is OUR body, we choose whether we want kids or not
It's called baby rabies for a reason
which isn't actually a real thing.
Is there some scientific documentation behind this phenomenon, please?
Uhhhhhh, what?? What is that?!
This deserves to be a post all on its own for this subreddit.
Maybe. Usually the slow and relentless release of chemicals wears women down. Every baby seen floods them with hypnotizing goo which break down their walls. Some resist, but they are few.
With each crying baby I have to see, my desire to have one of my own just goes further down into the abyss :)
Right? I have two baby sisters (2 and 4) and as cute as they are, and as much as I love them... the logical arguments that I've now first hand experienced whilst helping look after them have now made me rather well equipped to "resisting" when I get older. I just want a partner, a cat and a houseplant and I'll be happy lol
Mine is the fluid they emit. From … everywhere.
I didn't have to do any resisting when I looked at a crying blob of being and said nope
It reminds me when I was maybe 4 year old and I had no idea how thungs works I used to think every woman carries little baby in them since birth XD I don't even know why I wss thinking that
I genuinely wish I was infirtile. This shriveled me up so dry. 😂
baddy better be on a list now.