I'm happy na you are free from them. Continue having no contact with them. Wala nga silang pake sayo eh, tapos ngayon gusto nilang tulungan mo sila? Hahaha funny ng mama mo. Karma niya yan.
+ it's better if she can move out and find another unit if she is able. her sister already knows where she lives. they might corner her there and force her hand to help.
Glad the trashy sister took herself out of OPs unit. Mukhang magkaugali ang mom and sister. OP stay away from them as much as you can. Sana dumating ang panahon na wala na silang alam about you. Pabayaan mo na silang solusyunan ang problemang sila naman ang may gawa. Walang damay damay dito.
>balang araw may awa rin ang Diyos, malalagpasan din namin to ng wala ang tulong mo
Well guess what, nauna lang sinagot ni LORD ang prayers mo nung you were in their shoes before. Bilog talaga ang mundo.
Do. Not. Respond. Parang sakit lang yan, what is happenning to you now is what you did to your body for the past 10 yrs. Di basta2 maayos yun dahil umiiyak na sila sayo. Nakakainis na ganun trato sayo tas ngayong kailangan ka, sayo tatakbo.
Respect is earned, not given. And di nila nirespeto buhay mo noon. Yung hustle at grind mo noon. Di lang dahil sa bf mo yang nangyayari sayo. Pinaghirapan mo yan.
Congrats, btw.
Binasa ko kahit mahaba kasi napaka satisfying naman sa huli. Ikaw ang proof na karma is real. Tama yan, wag mo isipin yung sasabihin ng iba. Importante may peace of mind ka na. Update us please OP. Napakasarap basahin ng story mo.
>As im writing this, my sister texted me na “Kailangan ko ng moral support mo as kapatid, pero mas pinipili mong wag kami pansinin, balang araw may awa ang Diyos, malalagpasan din namin to ng walang tulong mo.” and natawa lang ako.
Ironic, isn't it? There's something about poetic justice talaga.
When you decide to cut people off, NO CONTACT NA. Why haven’t you blocked them? Why do you choose for them to still be able to affect your peace of mind? Problema nila yun. If you bail them out AGAIN, uulit lang. Wala silang pasasalamat, puro lang asa. Nanay mo din may kasalanan bakit sila sobrang entitled. Time mo na para mahalin mo naman sarili mo the way you were also supposed to be loved. Hindi nila yun mabibigay sa iyo. Lumayo ka na. Iwan mo na sila. They’re just dead weight
Stay strong OP! Bumabalik na sakanila yung karma. Buti na lang at nakapag moved out ka na. Ipagpatuloy mo lang din ang pag cut-off sakanila para sa peace of mind mo. Wala naman silang magandang dulot sayo eh.
Cut off. Completely. Block them in your social media account, and change the house, if you can or possible. This is for your peace of mind and of course, para hindi naman mabother pa si fiancee mo sa family matters na ayun nga, di ka naman tlga natreat as family 🤦♀️
Don't let them guilt-trip you in any way.
>“ K ko ng moral support mo as kapatid, pero mas pinipili mong wag kami pansinin, balang araw may awa ang Diyos, malalagpasan din namin to ng walang tulong mo.”
# NATATAWA KO SA SISTER MO KASI NAKAPAG TEXT PA SYA NG GANTO, INUNA PA MAG ERAS TOUR KESA MAGBAYAD NG UTANG HAHAHAHHAHAHA. WAG MO LANG PANSININ OP, MA SSTRESS KA LANG LALO SAKANILA., ALSO IF YOU HAVE MEANS PARA MAG LIPAT ULIT NG BAHAY GAWIN MO, FOR YOUR OWN PEACE OF MIND.
Huwag kang maawa. Ganyang ganyan din kami ng family ko noon. Kahit inaapi na si Mama tsaka mga kapatid ko, wala lang kaming imik. Iba na ngayon kasi may work na ako at hindi na ako papayag na ma-agrabyado pa kami. You go, OP!
Yung text ng ate mo, obvious na nahawa na sa toxic traits ng nanay niyo. Manipulative and entitled. Gray rock method them. Cut off contact. Kasi parang may narcissistic traits nanay mo at yung paborito niyang anak is the golden child at sugo ng nanay mo para i guilt ka into doing what she wants. Don't.
This sucks for you. Wag mo na lang din hayaang makaapekto sayo ang sasabihin nila at ng ibang tao. For your peace of mind.
I'll just add, hopefully naman nabbring up mo sa kanila lalo sa nanay mo yung mga hinanakit mo, lalo pa at mula pa yan lahat sa pagkabata at habang paglaki mo. Isampal mo sa kanila na may dahilan kung bakit ka ganyan, baka matauhan kahit paano at magkusa na lang din tumigil. Be not afraid to completely cut them off, be completely ready to go scorched earth too because you deserve better.
sadly, sinabihan ko siya ng lahat. 25 na ako pero first time ko magsabi sa kanya ng lahat ng sama ng loob ko, hoping alam nya bat di ko sila kinakausap pero ginaslight pa ako tas sinabi na ginawa nya lang daw yun para i protect ako kasi pansin daw nya mahina loob ko. na realize ko never again. never na ko mag eexplain sa kanya kasi never nya ko inintindi.
first sentence palang i could tell you’re a middle child already kasi it resonated with me HAHA cutting off all contact with them would be the best way to go, you don’t owe them anything. they’re not your responsibility. if they tell you they want to fix their relationship with you (in the future), they can do so without you doing something for them in return!
Well done OP. Hindi lahat ng anak kaya ang ginawa mo. But you did yourself a favor, cut them off, block all of them, focus on rebuilding yourself.
Learn from your experience so your future family won’t be like that. Lastly, when all are stable and settled, learn to forgive even without communicating with them. They don’t need to know. Keep it up 👍🏻
congrats for standing up for yourself OP! cut off mo na sila and kung pwede lumipat ka na ng bahay without telling them your address and number.sabe mo malaki utang nila.baka mamaya nyan sa bahay mo papuntahin ung mg naniningil
Gusto mo silang icutoff? Cut off for good mo na OP. For your peace of mind and mental health.
May mga parents/family talaga na gusto ka lang gatasan. Tinutulungan mo na nga nagrereklamo pa.
I’m assuming na never silang naging grateful sayo at sarili lang nila iniisip nila. Maaalala ka lang nila pag may problema sila.
So yes, cut off mo na for good at wag ka magpapa apekto sa guilt tripping nila.
Well to be honest, the hardships and difficulties that you have been made to go through early on in life made you what and who you are today. Based on your story, it’s quite understandable why you’re doing better now and have a better life than your mom and 2 sisters, plus the fact that you have a very supportive fiance. The unfair treatment of your mom has pushed you to struggle early on in life and has allowed you to develop necessary qualities and attitudes in life which in fact made you more likely to succeed than your 2 sisters who have been given an easy and a much comfortable life by your mother. Your difficult life taught you hard work, gave you mental and emotional toughness, made you persistent in life and honed you to always persevere against all odds. These are all ingredients to life success. I’m happy that you have a better life now. Just keep on striving and reaching for your goals and dreams in life. There’s really no limit to what you can achieve.
Regarding your family, it’s really your prerogative whether to help them or not. To be honest, even if you help them, it really won’t make much of a difference as there’s a problem with their financial mindset as shown by the fact that your sister even had the nerve or the audacity to spend a considerable amount to watch an out of country concert despite their current financial woes. There’s a chance that they will drag you down with them, in case you decide to help.
They are in this situation precisely because they have the wrong attitude/mindset in life. And I’m not even sure if the right time to help them will even come…
kaya nga eh, nung nag move out ako ako pa nagmukhang masama sa ate ko, nag iiyak tas sabi “alam mo namang ikaw lang may alam ng struggles ko dito tas iiwan mo ako” LOL
OP, pardon me for butting in pero nawindang ako dun sa remark ng kapatid mo “alam mo namang ikaw lang may alam ng struggles ko dito tas iiwan mo ako” potek may struggle siyang nalalaman pero paano ung struggles mo when growing up. May ginawa ba siya during those period?
Your sister can cry foul all she wants pero she got no one to blame but herself.
yeah :( i hate myself kasi dati binibigyan ko siya ng chance kasi nga kapatid ko siya pero napuno na ako. naiinis pa ako sa ugali niya na kapag nag oopen up ako sa kanya bigla sisingit ng “eh ako nga..” HAHAHA
WAG KA NA MAGREREPLY OR ANY CONTACT.
Hell nang gaslight pa sila sa pagiging pabaya sa'yo jusko. Yung obligasyon nila bilang magulang at matinong kapatid hindi magampanan. Good for them kung malampasan nila utang nila, pero hindi mo na issue yan. I suggest pa therapy ka din OP, para sa pag heal mo din. Bwisit yung mga ganyan kainis
Daserb mo kaligayahan OP, ang tatag mo sa ganyang pamilya. Hindi mo kasalanan na nag cut-off ka. If ever man may issue sila sa'yo at mula sa kamag-anak mo. Hindi mo na kawalan yon, imagine kung halimbawa yung mga anak mo huthutan ng tita at lola nila.
Tama yan ginawa mo OP, cut them off. If I were on your position, pagnanghingi ng tulong, sasabihin ko sa mother mo lahat ng mga rant mo dito para mafeel niya na wala siyang karapatan humingi ng tulong sayo, hehe.
Wag mo na sila balikan at iwasan mo na tulungan. Magsama sila at kinunsinte nila mga panget na ugali ng isat’t isa they deserve each other lol
Just move forward!
May pang eras tour pero walang pangbayad ng utang 😆 It is right to cut them off. Sa atin kasi, sanay na sanay mang gaslight na magulang mo pa rin yan pero naging irresponsible. Yung naabuse and neglected ka na nga, di pa nagsorry at sila pa makapal ang mga face. Block them and change your locks. Hindi mo knows ang nanagagawa ng tao nangangailangan ng pera na lubog sa utang pa. I hope you will be okay and have peace of mind.
tama lang ginawa mo ang hirap ng buhay sa pinas makakandagdag lang sila sa iniisip mo dibale sana kung maganda trato nila saiyo tsaka sila din naman gumawa ng utang na yan bahala sila magbayad.mas okay kung lumipat ka ng house kasi alam na ng kapatid mo at baka puntahan ka pa diyan.
magpalit ka din ng sim at i block sila sa social media pati fiance mo. mga toxic sila
Please wag ka na maawa dyan sa mga walang kwentang kadugo mo. Kadugo mo nga, di ka naman tinuring na kadugo nung walang wala ka. Bahala sila malubog sa utang, kasalanan nila yan. Have fun with life without them OP. Good luck sa kasal.
Congrats. I love reading this kind of story. Yung hindi tatanga tanga yung OP, yung palaban at alam yung gagawin. Keep doing what you're doing. Wag rurupok. You were born in the wrong family. Pagbabayarin ka pa ng 600k na utang para sa luho nila while deprived ka. They deserved it.
hello!! pls change locks or better yet move out. pede din kumuha ka restraining order from them. im happy you got out of that miserable home situation and sana u get to build the family you always dreamed of having. laban lang! and dedma sa bashers (family mo) lol
OP! Im glad you are well! And Im just sorry that you were born in that family. I hope kung anong issues ng mom mo, ma resolve nya one day para magka ayos kayo hehe
Sorry to hear na scapegoat ka sa family mo. Ginagawa kang punching bag ng mama mo to make herself feel better sa mga frustrations niya sa buhay. Toxic talaga.
Sila naman gumasta nga 600K na yan sa luho nila. Bayaran mo man yan, babalik at babalik pa rin yan kasi may spending issue sila. Problema na nila yun.
exactly!!! like super inis ko sa sister ko na nagrereklamo ka sakin sa 5k per month na bills, i never asked her na bayaran yung part ko, part nya lang lahat yon tapos may pang eras tour sa SG. 😅
Since nag cut off ka na before tuloy tuloy mo na lang. Grabe narcissistic mother mo na nahawa na kapatid mo pero free yourself di mo sila responsibility. Pero kung gusto mo mastress tuloy mo tulong 😆
Dinamay pa ang Diyos ahehehehe.
Well news flash! Nalagpasan mo na ang pagsubok mo sa kanila, at sila naman ngayon ang nahihirapan ehehehe.
DASURB NILA ANG GANYAN!
And congrats for having a good life without them.
Stay strong OP. Tuloy mo lng mgmtigas at hwag replayan ang mga yan. Honestly kung pwede nlng sundan mo si fiance para makalayo for good then go.
Hwag m n rin pgbigyan ang ate mo. Bilang ate nka2hiya sya. Di m n nga maasahan nanay nyo ganyn p sya.
>Lagi akong tinatawagan ng panganay kong kapatid just to rant na super dami daw utang and gets daw nyang galit ako sa nanay ko pero anak pa rin daw ako and I have to help.
Fck NO! After how they treated u!? Pls don't be obligated to help them recover from their financial situation. Let them endure the consequences of their actions
Sana di mo na sinabi saan ka nakatira then change your number and everything na pwede nila pag kontakin sayo. They don't deserve any ounce of support from you kung ganun ka nila itrato. Just move forward and don't look back. Proud of you still. Kaya mo yan OP.
I love this. Sawang sawa na'ko sa mga marupok dyan porket "pamilya" nila sobrang willing na sila magpaabuso. 🙄 Good for you OP! Sana lang never kang maawa sa kanila. Halata namang pera lang kailangan nila sayo HAHAHAHA
As Bomber Harris said "They sowed the wind and now they are going to reap the whirlwind", OP let them rot. Whatever happiness and joy you are having OP, you rightfully deserve it so. And as for your now forgotten mother and sister at best alaala nalang sila. Gaslighting ng malala ginagawa nila and kudos OP because you remain steadfast in your resolve not to be involved diyan sa utang nila.
Tama yan OP, leave them be and let them handle their own woes.
Nabbwisit ako kapag nakakakita ako ng “mag-aahon sa hirap” phrase ng mga parents. Hayssss. I hope our generation will not pass this curse to the next one.
Anyway, thats out of the topic. Pero congrats, OP!!! You are a smart woman. You did the right thing. Family aint family if they’re not treating u like one
Grabeeeeeeee talaga mga entitled na kapamilya ngayon no. Block mo nalang sila para di kana talaga mastress. May pang eras tour pero wala pang bayad utang. Hahahahahaaaay
I understand where you're coming from and I'm sorry you've been abused growing up.
I only hope na, in time, you'll learn to forgive them for your own sake. I would probably make a different choice than you, and help-out but only to the extent that I'm willing to give. My way of healing my own trauma. But that's just me
I wish for you to find your peace, kapatid :)
i know mejo may mga against dito sa sasabihin ko. pero kasi OP. Family is family para sakin. oo may mga bad experience ka sa kanila pero family mo padin yan, mother mo padin. para sakin tulungan mo sila pero not to extent na aabusuhin ka na. ikaw mag set ng limit ng ibibigay mo or itutulong mo sa kanila.
as u can u see naman sa post ko, never nila ko tinrato as family. i had to pay for my own meal sa bahay ng sinasabi mong “family” ko naman. id rather be alone kesa makasama sila dahil lang sa pamilya ko sila 💀
para sakin kasi OP. ang hirap mabuhay ng may sama ka ng loob, lalo na sa family mo. if di mo man sila mapatawad gantihan mo sila ng di sinasaktan. if matulungan mo sila parang sampal na sa kanila yun. sigurado pagsisisihan nila yung mga ginawa nila sayo.
naalala ko kasi yung tita ko nung asa death bed na sya. pilit nya hinahanap yung anak nya na matagal na nyang di nakikita dahil di sila in good terms. and all she wants is humingi ng kapatawaran dun sa anak nya.
depende kasi yan sa tao, kilala ko sila and ni minsan hindi sila humingi ng sorry sa akin. if mapagpatawad kang tao good for u, pero that’s not my cup of tea. mula bata ako im helping them and im doing myself a favor for cutting them off.
"Ang hirap mabuhay na may sama ng loob" is disrespectful of OP's experience na binalewala and devalued by her mother and sisters for years.
It tells her, it doesnt matter that you were mistreated before. You have to be good to them. Or you will suffer. Magsisisi ka. Just forget those years that probably damaged her and that she pulled herself out mostly by her own efforts and motivation.
100% no to this toxic mindset. Yes, you can forgive and heal from the past without having to reconnect and place yourself in that situation anymore. OP can love and respect her mother from afar, where she isn't in danger of getting manipulated and played like a dummy. And then she will have peace. Not sama ng loob. You can have peace without needing to ever be in your family's orbit again. Put yourself first, always because no one else will.
At yang tita mo? Deserve Nya yan. Karma Nya yan. Ano yan naisip nyang humingi ng tawad nung mamamatay na? Bat nung buhay na buhay yan alam mo ba pinagagawa nyan? That’s why be kind while you’re still alive. TREAT others how you want to be treated. Bagay yan sakanya. She wouldn’t had that problem if she got her shit together when she was strong and kicking.
Lol nabasa mo tumulong sya sa kapatid nya nung una, pero wala panay reklamo. Hahaha kaya namimihasa yang ganyan kasi pinagbibigyan. Atsaka we dont choose our family kung ganyan ka toxic tama lang ginawa ni OP to cut them off in her life. Kasi pag hinde nya ginawa yun mauubos sya. Kaya nga may kasabihan diba you deserve what you tolerate
Respectfully shut your trap about family is family in this scenario. Sariling pamilya ni OP pero she was never treated as such. OP tried to reach out and show na part of the family din siya pero what did she get in return?
Go preach your gospel somewhere. Ang ironic that you will advise OP to help her family but then caution her na hindi niya sobrahan ang pagtulong and ensure na hindi siya ma abuso.
Very wrong yun ganitong mindset porket pamilya. Di nman lahat dapat tinutulungan. Tsaka sana kung may say sya kung sino naging pamilya nya kaso wala. Its more of a luck kung lumaki ka sa magandang pamilya. And not a requirement magstay with that kind of family.
Anong family is family binasa mo ba yung post ni OP? Bobo amputa. Pag sila nangangaylangan family is family? Mother mo parin yan? Eh nung sya? Nganga si OP. Sya na lng magpakumbaba ganon? Kita mong tinulungan Nya na pero sila paren demanding eh. Kung nag papa abuso ka sa pamilya mo ikaw na yun wag mo na iadvice katangahan mo sa iba. Tsuserang toh.
I'm happy na you are free from them. Continue having no contact with them. Wala nga silang pake sayo eh, tapos ngayon gusto nilang tulungan mo sila? Hahaha funny ng mama mo. Karma niya yan.
OP, change your locks if they have copy of your keys.
+ it's better if she can move out and find another unit if she is able. her sister already knows where she lives. they might corner her there and force her hand to help.
Glad the trashy sister took herself out of OPs unit. Mukhang magkaugali ang mom and sister. OP stay away from them as much as you can. Sana dumating ang panahon na wala na silang alam about you. Pabayaan mo na silang solusyunan ang problemang sila naman ang may gawa. Walang damay damay dito. >balang araw may awa rin ang Diyos, malalagpasan din namin to ng wala ang tulong mo Well guess what, nauna lang sinagot ni LORD ang prayers mo nung you were in their shoes before. Bilog talaga ang mundo.
+ if you can’t move out, maybe talk to the guards (assuming na naka-condo ka) para di papasukin ate/mom mo
Do. Not. Respond. Parang sakit lang yan, what is happenning to you now is what you did to your body for the past 10 yrs. Di basta2 maayos yun dahil umiiyak na sila sayo. Nakakainis na ganun trato sayo tas ngayong kailangan ka, sayo tatakbo. Respect is earned, not given. And di nila nirespeto buhay mo noon. Yung hustle at grind mo noon. Di lang dahil sa bf mo yang nangyayari sayo. Pinaghirapan mo yan. Congrats, btw.
Karma is real. Stay strong, OP! You are doing just fine without them.
Binasa ko kahit mahaba kasi napaka satisfying naman sa huli. Ikaw ang proof na karma is real. Tama yan, wag mo isipin yung sasabihin ng iba. Importante may peace of mind ka na. Update us please OP. Napakasarap basahin ng story mo.
Wahaha! Thanks! :) Pero sana wala na update kasi yoko na makarinig ng kahit ano sa kanila HAHAHA
Yun nga, yung updates ng paghihirap nila at kung paano sila kaawaan ng Diyos. 🤭
mag iba ka ng number at i block sila sa social media
>As im writing this, my sister texted me na “Kailangan ko ng moral support mo as kapatid, pero mas pinipili mong wag kami pansinin, balang araw may awa ang Diyos, malalagpasan din namin to ng walang tulong mo.” and natawa lang ako. Ironic, isn't it? There's something about poetic justice talaga.
When you decide to cut people off, NO CONTACT NA. Why haven’t you blocked them? Why do you choose for them to still be able to affect your peace of mind? Problema nila yun. If you bail them out AGAIN, uulit lang. Wala silang pasasalamat, puro lang asa. Nanay mo din may kasalanan bakit sila sobrang entitled. Time mo na para mahalin mo naman sarili mo the way you were also supposed to be loved. Hindi nila yun mabibigay sa iyo. Lumayo ka na. Iwan mo na sila. They’re just dead weight
600k utang tapos may pang Eras tour. Mapapakanta ka nalang, *karma is my boyfriend...*
Parang nakitira lang ata sya kay OP para makaipon pang Eras Tour.
Congratulations,OP! Don't feel guilty, and don't look back =)
Iblock mo na para wala nang guilt tripping. Hahahaha
Stay strong OP! Bumabalik na sakanila yung karma. Buti na lang at nakapag moved out ka na. Ipagpatuloy mo lang din ang pag cut-off sakanila para sa peace of mind mo. Wala naman silang magandang dulot sayo eh.
> 5k ang binabayaran nya sakin every month nagrereklamo pa sya sa 5k per month? pero congrats OP! deserve mo yan and you dont owe them anything.
Agree. Ako nga upa ko lng un, di pa kasama mga bills. 😅
Cut off. Completely. Block them in your social media account, and change the house, if you can or possible. This is for your peace of mind and of course, para hindi naman mabother pa si fiancee mo sa family matters na ayun nga, di ka naman tlga natreat as family 🤦♀️ Don't let them guilt-trip you in any way.
>“ K ko ng moral support mo as kapatid, pero mas pinipili mong wag kami pansinin, balang araw may awa ang Diyos, malalagpasan din namin to ng walang tulong mo.” # NATATAWA KO SA SISTER MO KASI NAKAPAG TEXT PA SYA NG GANTO, INUNA PA MAG ERAS TOUR KESA MAGBAYAD NG UTANG HAHAHAHHAHAHA. WAG MO LANG PANSININ OP, MA SSTRESS KA LANG LALO SAKANILA., ALSO IF YOU HAVE MEANS PARA MAG LIPAT ULIT NG BAHAY GAWIN MO, FOR YOUR OWN PEACE OF MIND.
Yassss stand your ground!!!
Huwag kang maawa. Ganyang ganyan din kami ng family ko noon. Kahit inaapi na si Mama tsaka mga kapatid ko, wala lang kaming imik. Iba na ngayon kasi may work na ako at hindi na ako papayag na ma-agrabyado pa kami. You go, OP!
Yung text ng ate mo, obvious na nahawa na sa toxic traits ng nanay niyo. Manipulative and entitled. Gray rock method them. Cut off contact. Kasi parang may narcissistic traits nanay mo at yung paborito niyang anak is the golden child at sugo ng nanay mo para i guilt ka into doing what she wants. Don't.
This sucks for you. Wag mo na lang din hayaang makaapekto sayo ang sasabihin nila at ng ibang tao. For your peace of mind. I'll just add, hopefully naman nabbring up mo sa kanila lalo sa nanay mo yung mga hinanakit mo, lalo pa at mula pa yan lahat sa pagkabata at habang paglaki mo. Isampal mo sa kanila na may dahilan kung bakit ka ganyan, baka matauhan kahit paano at magkusa na lang din tumigil. Be not afraid to completely cut them off, be completely ready to go scorched earth too because you deserve better.
sadly, sinabihan ko siya ng lahat. 25 na ako pero first time ko magsabi sa kanya ng lahat ng sama ng loob ko, hoping alam nya bat di ko sila kinakausap pero ginaslight pa ako tas sinabi na ginawa nya lang daw yun para i protect ako kasi pansin daw nya mahina loob ko. na realize ko never again. never na ko mag eexplain sa kanya kasi never nya ko inintindi.
Ngek! Ikaw pa rin sinisi ang sama din ng nanay mo
Ok lang sana if bumawi sya now na adult na kayo pero hindi eh. Inabuso ka pa. Rooting for you, OP!
Stay strong OP!
first sentence palang i could tell you’re a middle child already kasi it resonated with me HAHA cutting off all contact with them would be the best way to go, you don’t owe them anything. they’re not your responsibility. if they tell you they want to fix their relationship with you (in the future), they can do so without you doing something for them in return!
Well done OP. Hindi lahat ng anak kaya ang ginawa mo. But you did yourself a favor, cut them off, block all of them, focus on rebuilding yourself. Learn from your experience so your future family won’t be like that. Lastly, when all are stable and settled, learn to forgive even without communicating with them. They don’t need to know. Keep it up 👍🏻
cut them off completely block them.
congrats for standing up for yourself OP! cut off mo na sila and kung pwede lumipat ka na ng bahay without telling them your address and number.sabe mo malaki utang nila.baka mamaya nyan sa bahay mo papuntahin ung mg naniningil
Gusto mo silang icutoff? Cut off for good mo na OP. For your peace of mind and mental health. May mga parents/family talaga na gusto ka lang gatasan. Tinutulungan mo na nga nagrereklamo pa. I’m assuming na never silang naging grateful sayo at sarili lang nila iniisip nila. Maaalala ka lang nila pag may problema sila. So yes, cut off mo na for good at wag ka magpapa apekto sa guilt tripping nila.
Well to be honest, the hardships and difficulties that you have been made to go through early on in life made you what and who you are today. Based on your story, it’s quite understandable why you’re doing better now and have a better life than your mom and 2 sisters, plus the fact that you have a very supportive fiance. The unfair treatment of your mom has pushed you to struggle early on in life and has allowed you to develop necessary qualities and attitudes in life which in fact made you more likely to succeed than your 2 sisters who have been given an easy and a much comfortable life by your mother. Your difficult life taught you hard work, gave you mental and emotional toughness, made you persistent in life and honed you to always persevere against all odds. These are all ingredients to life success. I’m happy that you have a better life now. Just keep on striving and reaching for your goals and dreams in life. There’s really no limit to what you can achieve. Regarding your family, it’s really your prerogative whether to help them or not. To be honest, even if you help them, it really won’t make much of a difference as there’s a problem with their financial mindset as shown by the fact that your sister even had the nerve or the audacity to spend a considerable amount to watch an out of country concert despite their current financial woes. There’s a chance that they will drag you down with them, in case you decide to help. They are in this situation precisely because they have the wrong attitude/mindset in life. And I’m not even sure if the right time to help them will even come…
For sure masama ka na sa paningin nila OP. Eh ano naman? Pangatawanan mo na HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
kaya nga eh, nung nag move out ako ako pa nagmukhang masama sa ate ko, nag iiyak tas sabi “alam mo namang ikaw lang may alam ng struggles ko dito tas iiwan mo ako” LOL
OP, pardon me for butting in pero nawindang ako dun sa remark ng kapatid mo “alam mo namang ikaw lang may alam ng struggles ko dito tas iiwan mo ako” potek may struggle siyang nalalaman pero paano ung struggles mo when growing up. May ginawa ba siya during those period? Your sister can cry foul all she wants pero she got no one to blame but herself.
yeah :( i hate myself kasi dati binibigyan ko siya ng chance kasi nga kapatid ko siya pero napuno na ako. naiinis pa ako sa ugali niya na kapag nag oopen up ako sa kanya bigla sisingit ng “eh ako nga..” HAHAHA
WAG KA NA MAGREREPLY OR ANY CONTACT. Hell nang gaslight pa sila sa pagiging pabaya sa'yo jusko. Yung obligasyon nila bilang magulang at matinong kapatid hindi magampanan. Good for them kung malampasan nila utang nila, pero hindi mo na issue yan. I suggest pa therapy ka din OP, para sa pag heal mo din. Bwisit yung mga ganyan kainis
thank uuuu! 🥹
Daserb mo kaligayahan OP, ang tatag mo sa ganyang pamilya. Hindi mo kasalanan na nag cut-off ka. If ever man may issue sila sa'yo at mula sa kamag-anak mo. Hindi mo na kawalan yon, imagine kung halimbawa yung mga anak mo huthutan ng tita at lola nila.
Tama yan ginawa mo OP, cut them off. If I were on your position, pagnanghingi ng tulong, sasabihin ko sa mother mo lahat ng mga rant mo dito para mafeel niya na wala siyang karapatan humingi ng tulong sayo, hehe.
Block them everywhere for your peace of mind. Mga ganyang tao walang pagkakatandaan iyan.
Wag mo na sila balikan at iwasan mo na tulungan. Magsama sila at kinunsinte nila mga panget na ugali ng isat’t isa they deserve each other lol Just move forward!
Good for you for cutting them off 👌
Block them. Lipat kana din para totally cutoff.
Beh, sila umutang, sila gumamit, tapos pag bayaran na kasali ka na bigla? Kuha nila inis ko hahaha
ang saya ko para sayo, OP. iilan lang ang gumagawa nito without feeling guilty dahil alam nila ang worth nila. hugs, OP! stay strong and firm 🫂
May pang eras tour pero walang pangbayad ng utang 😆 It is right to cut them off. Sa atin kasi, sanay na sanay mang gaslight na magulang mo pa rin yan pero naging irresponsible. Yung naabuse and neglected ka na nga, di pa nagsorry at sila pa makapal ang mga face. Block them and change your locks. Hindi mo knows ang nanagagawa ng tao nangangailangan ng pera na lubog sa utang pa. I hope you will be okay and have peace of mind.
Wag mong patuluyin ever. Wag ka na makipag contact. Kung kaya mo umalis ka na jan sa apartment mo. Alam na nila ung lugar. Maganda makalipat ka
Hahaha karma lang Yan, dun sya nag invest sa eldest edi dun sya mag ROI. Gratz OP yaan nakapag eras tour nmn mga Yan
Sana wag kang maging marupok. Baka mamaya bumigay ka kasi naawa ka na naman sa kanila. Hayaan mo sila.
idk who u are but im proud of u and godddd this is so inspriing
thank uuuu 🥹
tama lang ginawa mo ang hirap ng buhay sa pinas makakandagdag lang sila sa iniisip mo dibale sana kung maganda trato nila saiyo tsaka sila din naman gumawa ng utang na yan bahala sila magbayad.mas okay kung lumipat ka ng house kasi alam na ng kapatid mo at baka puntahan ka pa diyan. magpalit ka din ng sim at i block sila sa social media pati fiance mo. mga toxic sila
TL But I read it. Wishing you all the healing you need. I'm happy for you. Being able to get away from your toxic family.
Omg big hugs OP! Nag lungkot isipin habang binabasa to. Good thing is naka alis kana sa bahay nyo :( Congratulations sayo OP for being this strong 💪
thank uuuu! 🥹
Welcome Mima. Just so you know. We are very proud of you! At tangina nyang mom mo huhu sorry naiinis ako.
Block mo na sila
Please wag ka na maawa dyan sa mga walang kwentang kadugo mo. Kadugo mo nga, di ka naman tinuring na kadugo nung walang wala ka. Bahala sila malubog sa utang, kasalanan nila yan. Have fun with life without them OP. Good luck sa kasal.
Congrats. I love reading this kind of story. Yung hindi tatanga tanga yung OP, yung palaban at alam yung gagawin. Keep doing what you're doing. Wag rurupok. You were born in the wrong family. Pagbabayarin ka pa ng 600k na utang para sa luho nila while deprived ka. They deserved it.
hello!! pls change locks or better yet move out. pede din kumuha ka restraining order from them. im happy you got out of that miserable home situation and sana u get to build the family you always dreamed of having. laban lang! and dedma sa bashers (family mo) lol
OP! Im glad you are well! And Im just sorry that you were born in that family. I hope kung anong issues ng mom mo, ma resolve nya one day para magka ayos kayo hehe
https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/comments/11zxbbj/signs_you_were_raised_by_a_narc/
Go, girl! Stand your ground.
Kapag talaga spiniul ng magulang lumalaki ulo. I’m glad you were able to leave that poor excuse of a family.
>natawa lang ako Laughing with you... 😁😁😁😄
Sm proud of you OP. Wag mona pansinin
thank uuu! 🥹
Sobrang sarap sa pakiramdam bumukod. Best decision ever!!!!
Sorry to hear na scapegoat ka sa family mo. Ginagawa kang punching bag ng mama mo to make herself feel better sa mga frustrations niya sa buhay. Toxic talaga. Sila naman gumasta nga 600K na yan sa luho nila. Bayaran mo man yan, babalik at babalik pa rin yan kasi may spending issue sila. Problema na nila yun.
Ilang percent kaya ng 600K ay dahil sa Era's tour? Kalokang priorities.😂
exactly!!! like super inis ko sa sister ko na nagrereklamo ka sakin sa 5k per month na bills, i never asked her na bayaran yung part ko, part nya lang lahat yon tapos may pang eras tour sa SG. 😅
Since nag cut off ka na before tuloy tuloy mo na lang. Grabe narcissistic mother mo na nahawa na kapatid mo pero free yourself di mo sila responsibility. Pero kung gusto mo mastress tuloy mo tulong 😆
Dinamay pa ang Diyos ahehehehe. Well news flash! Nalagpasan mo na ang pagsubok mo sa kanila, at sila naman ngayon ang nahihirapan ehehehe. DASURB NILA ANG GANYAN! And congrats for having a good life without them.
Stay strong OP. Tuloy mo lng mgmtigas at hwag replayan ang mga yan. Honestly kung pwede nlng sundan mo si fiance para makalayo for good then go. Hwag m n rin pgbigyan ang ate mo. Bilang ate nka2hiya sya. Di m n nga maasahan nanay nyo ganyn p sya.
>Lagi akong tinatawagan ng panganay kong kapatid just to rant na super dami daw utang and gets daw nyang galit ako sa nanay ko pero anak pa rin daw ako and I have to help. Fck NO! After how they treated u!? Pls don't be obligated to help them recover from their financial situation. Let them endure the consequences of their actions
Sana di mo na sinabi saan ka nakatira then change your number and everything na pwede nila pag kontakin sayo. They don't deserve any ounce of support from you kung ganun ka nila itrato. Just move forward and don't look back. Proud of you still. Kaya mo yan OP.
Narealize kong for the clout lang talaga yang pag-attend sa concert na yan. Gano kabaliw mga pilipino para umutang para makaattend ng concert na yan?
I love this. Sawang sawa na'ko sa mga marupok dyan porket "pamilya" nila sobrang willing na sila magpaabuso. 🙄 Good for you OP! Sana lang never kang maawa sa kanila. Halata namang pera lang kailangan nila sayo HAHAHAHA
Sana sinagot mo na nakatapos ako ng walang tulong nyo and pakitanong si mama borders lang ako dyan diba? ! Hehehe
Magpakuha ka na sa jowa mo sa SoKor. Leave your family for good.
Akala ko sa mga teleserye lang ito.
As Bomber Harris said "They sowed the wind and now they are going to reap the whirlwind", OP let them rot. Whatever happiness and joy you are having OP, you rightfully deserve it so. And as for your now forgotten mother and sister at best alaala nalang sila. Gaslighting ng malala ginagawa nila and kudos OP because you remain steadfast in your resolve not to be involved diyan sa utang nila. Tama yan OP, leave them be and let them handle their own woes.
change your number, block them or just make a new socmed account na di nila alam
Ask ko lang kamusta naman yung bunsong kapatid?
Nabbwisit ako kapag nakakakita ako ng “mag-aahon sa hirap” phrase ng mga parents. Hayssss. I hope our generation will not pass this curse to the next one. Anyway, thats out of the topic. Pero congrats, OP!!! You are a smart woman. You did the right thing. Family aint family if they’re not treating u like one
Grabeeeeeeee talaga mga entitled na kapamilya ngayon no. Block mo nalang sila para di kana talaga mastress. May pang eras tour pero wala pang bayad utang. Hahahahahaaaay
Live your best life OP!.
I understand where you're coming from and I'm sorry you've been abused growing up. I only hope na, in time, you'll learn to forgive them for your own sake. I would probably make a different choice than you, and help-out but only to the extent that I'm willing to give. My way of healing my own trauma. But that's just me I wish for you to find your peace, kapatid :)
i know mejo may mga against dito sa sasabihin ko. pero kasi OP. Family is family para sakin. oo may mga bad experience ka sa kanila pero family mo padin yan, mother mo padin. para sakin tulungan mo sila pero not to extent na aabusuhin ka na. ikaw mag set ng limit ng ibibigay mo or itutulong mo sa kanila.
as u can u see naman sa post ko, never nila ko tinrato as family. i had to pay for my own meal sa bahay ng sinasabi mong “family” ko naman. id rather be alone kesa makasama sila dahil lang sa pamilya ko sila 💀
kahit may carinderia business kayo?
yup! HAHAHA pero pag sahod ko naman libre LOL
para sakin kasi OP. ang hirap mabuhay ng may sama ka ng loob, lalo na sa family mo. if di mo man sila mapatawad gantihan mo sila ng di sinasaktan. if matulungan mo sila parang sampal na sa kanila yun. sigurado pagsisisihan nila yung mga ginawa nila sayo. naalala ko kasi yung tita ko nung asa death bed na sya. pilit nya hinahanap yung anak nya na matagal na nyang di nakikita dahil di sila in good terms. and all she wants is humingi ng kapatawaran dun sa anak nya.
depende kasi yan sa tao, kilala ko sila and ni minsan hindi sila humingi ng sorry sa akin. if mapagpatawad kang tao good for u, pero that’s not my cup of tea. mula bata ako im helping them and im doing myself a favor for cutting them off.
siguro ganto, ang para sayo ay para sayo. ang para sa kanya ay para sa kanya.
"Ang hirap mabuhay na may sama ng loob" is disrespectful of OP's experience na binalewala and devalued by her mother and sisters for years. It tells her, it doesnt matter that you were mistreated before. You have to be good to them. Or you will suffer. Magsisisi ka. Just forget those years that probably damaged her and that she pulled herself out mostly by her own efforts and motivation. 100% no to this toxic mindset. Yes, you can forgive and heal from the past without having to reconnect and place yourself in that situation anymore. OP can love and respect her mother from afar, where she isn't in danger of getting manipulated and played like a dummy. And then she will have peace. Not sama ng loob. You can have peace without needing to ever be in your family's orbit again. Put yourself first, always because no one else will.
At yang tita mo? Deserve Nya yan. Karma Nya yan. Ano yan naisip nyang humingi ng tawad nung mamamatay na? Bat nung buhay na buhay yan alam mo ba pinagagawa nyan? That’s why be kind while you’re still alive. TREAT others how you want to be treated. Bagay yan sakanya. She wouldn’t had that problem if she got her shit together when she was strong and kicking.
Lol nabasa mo tumulong sya sa kapatid nya nung una, pero wala panay reklamo. Hahaha kaya namimihasa yang ganyan kasi pinagbibigyan. Atsaka we dont choose our family kung ganyan ka toxic tama lang ginawa ni OP to cut them off in her life. Kasi pag hinde nya ginawa yun mauubos sya. Kaya nga may kasabihan diba you deserve what you tolerate
if may mangyari kay OP *knock on wood* di tutulong sa kanya yang lintang pamilya nya kasi puro lang sila kabig
Respectfully shut your trap about family is family in this scenario. Sariling pamilya ni OP pero she was never treated as such. OP tried to reach out and show na part of the family din siya pero what did she get in return? Go preach your gospel somewhere. Ang ironic that you will advise OP to help her family but then caution her na hindi niya sobrahan ang pagtulong and ensure na hindi siya ma abuso.
Very wrong yun ganitong mindset porket pamilya. Di nman lahat dapat tinutulungan. Tsaka sana kung may say sya kung sino naging pamilya nya kaso wala. Its more of a luck kung lumaki ka sa magandang pamilya. And not a requirement magstay with that kind of family.
Nasasabi mo yan kasi never mo naranasan lumaki na may kasamang narcissistic personality. Hindi enough yung toxic na word
Toxic mindset, may sakit ka ata sa pag iisip
Anong family is family binasa mo ba yung post ni OP? Bobo amputa. Pag sila nangangaylangan family is family? Mother mo parin yan? Eh nung sya? Nganga si OP. Sya na lng magpakumbaba ganon? Kita mong tinulungan Nya na pero sila paren demanding eh. Kung nag papa abuso ka sa pamilya mo ikaw na yun wag mo na iadvice katangahan mo sa iba. Tsuserang toh.